I’ve seen photos of this thing floating around for a while, but never did it occur to me that it’s in fact a real product. Available from Hammacher Schlemmer, this Wenger tool holds the Guinness Word Record for being the most multi-functional penknife. Kudos to you if you can name all of its fucntions. If not, here’s a real Swiss guy going over how ridiculous this thing really is.
I’m pissed they took the laser out.
Submitted by: Unknown
Via: Hammacher Schlemmer
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how the hell are you gonna use this if you get in a fight youll have better luck throughing it
It’s just a collector display model, not intended for real usage.
Grammar fails…you’re missing a period or two, an apostrophe, capitalization, and, worst of all, you don’t “through” something, you threw. In this case, though, it’s throw for present tense.
And in your comment, “You’re” should be capitalized, because it’s the beginning of a new, complete sentence.
You pedantic ass.
He deserved it, though.
This is true.
shut up no one cares about grammar
Well obviously bot pedrovay2003 and I do.
both*
You don’t use swiss army knifes for fighting.
No you use ninja stars. duh.
They’ve had this for quite a while IIRC.
It does have the laser pointer! Not to mention, it’s now on sale for only $995.
And if you read the amazon comments you may find many more helpful functions.
Most-functional? That thing is damn clumsy-looking. SwissTrollKnife.
I’m swiss myself and rolling on the floor laughin right now because of that guys swiss accent.
OMG
Haha! Me too!!
He’s probably from Berne…:)
Actually he says he’s in Delémont although I don’t know what a Swiss-German would be doing there. It’s not far from Berne though, although it’s actually in the Jura.
Me 2… at the first sentence you know, he’s swiss
)
btw: in Jura they also talk swiss german if i’m correct… i once was there and they talked swissgerman (k, i was a little boy then, but i understood them
And here the link to the product site (on top u could switch to english): http://www.wenger.ch/giant-knife-wenger-swiss-army-knife
Delemont is billangual, they do speak german and french.
No, he said the knife was manufactured in Delémont. He could be anywhere.
His accent is definitely from Bern.
And it’s really horrible to listen to such a strong swiss accent. Sadly there are still a lot of people here who can’t get their accent away.
I actually think the accent is awesome…because it’s funny and interesting and foreign. But what do I know? I’m American, not Swiss.
I would definitely cut myself just trying to use it.
Now THAT’S a knife!
- Crocodile Dundee
That’s not a knife. That’s a spoon.
- Bart Simpson
*knawf
Oh come on. In over NINE MINUTES of video, you couldn’t once show the knife closed??
i just skiped to the end to see it closed……and nothing
Same here, I am dissapoint
Googling “Wenger Giant” will give you some more satisfactory results, though.
I wanted to see the movie, but when he started talking about box i said- nooo
http://www.thinkgeek.com/gadgets/tools/8b97/?srp=24
You can get it from here!
“the pointless blade, for the kids” …. lol!
Also in Switzerland: “The hollow-point bullets, for the kids”
How does it fit into my trouser’s pocket ?
i think it would immediately drop your pants, so its the wrong question
its over 3 kg… -> http://www.wenger.ch/giant-knife-wenger-swiss-army-knife
You’ll never need to put it in your pocket, there’s always a use for it!
You can buy this sucker on ThinkGeek.com for the low low price of around 1500 bucks.
I’ve seen them for around $999… although is still seems about $980 over-priced
if you go to the amazon page of this baby (http://www.amazon.de/Wenger-Schweizer-Offiziersmesser-Messer-Schatulle/dp/B000R0JDSI/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1326925404&sr=8-2) there is a heap of fake reviews for it (all of them in german). they complain about how the local buses dont stop at the integrated bus stop, how the integrated disco isnt up to fire code and how the defibrilator can also be used as a torturing device and is therefore not in compliance with the geneva convention. good stuff.
The Swede from hell on wheels made this video.
Sweden is not Switzerland… When will they ever learn… -_-
It’s hard to tell the difference when they have the same uninteresting culture, ethnicity, and, well, non-importance in the world.
It’s a bit like saying there’s a difference between Catalans and Spaniards.
Trolls gonna troll
I think the guy making the video is Finnish or maybe Norwegian. Doesn’t quite sound like your typical Swedish accent (I’m Swedish).
The point of having this is, of course, just to have it. It’s far too unwieldy to actually use. It’s kind of multi-non-functional.
I can’t help but facepalm at them putting about 30 knives on the thing, it’s like “hey we want the guinness world record but we don’t know what to put on it. Oh let’s put dozens of knives that are the same size on it!”
Search for “Giant Messer, mit Schatulle” on the German Amazon site and check out the pictures uploaded by customers. Some pretty hilarious pics.
And if you happen to speak German, look at the reviews too. They’re pretty funny as well.
http://www.thinkgeek.com/gadgets/tools/8b97/?srp=21
You need giant hands to hold this thing while you turn the screwdriver, whittle wood, and so forth.
I can Stab you…….with 17 different sharp instruments………and that’s only half of the tools
OK, Bear Grylls is officially jealous.
No spoon or spork?
The most hilarious FAIL about this video is found if you press the closed caption button. So far I’ve read ‘YEs, like peace received full facial – morals coat knife’ and ‘So that is all local schools – I’m Oklahoma.’
Try it and be ready to witness the full majesty of CC fail.
What a “hoodge” box.
Man this thing is the Shit , Haves screwdrivers Knives Laser pointers clippers a Bike a mini bar a midget Beer cup holders a 9mm two grenades a bed and $5 Dollars. I need to get me this thing A . S . A . P
You are missing out the mini bathroom, the epic mini bar, a hat rack, free candy dispenser, and a coat rack.