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Cheezburger Company Blog
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well of course.. they’re the tastiest!
And have the most to offer…
My brother’s going to be the first pick. He’s always picked before me. I guess that payed off, though. Maybe they’ll spare me if I tell them where he is. I am not a good brother. But everyone has a will to survive, am I not right?
Technically seen, they are wrong.
If you eat meat, it’s the muscle of that animal, not the fat.
So aliens would actually eat the muscled people first, because they’re the tastiest. Fat is just disgusting.
Indeed
A) Highest Calorie levels
B) Colesterol Levels are also up there
C) And you also have to roll them in the most flour to find the wet spot
and easiest to catch
But maybe the aliens want to eat healthy, they don’t have eternal life either.
You can’t be sure. I’ve been living for over 300 years, and havn’t shown a single sign of aging. Oh crap, now they are going to backtrace this and try to kill me! Oh well, I am immortal. That may help.
Does that mean you’re a baby?
Backtrace! LOL! YOU DUN GOOFD
lol.
No Feathers?
Not quite!
That can’t be it, “quite” doesn’t start with a ‘F’.
Not funny? But this is funny and when the aliens come, running is going to be very helpful.
*adjusts tin foil hat*
I would think that aliens would be more cholesterol aware and go for leaner meat! Fatties would be exercised until at optimal weight.
Good point! Zombies like myself are lazy creatures and tend to go for the easy targets, but aliens have teleporters and death rays.
Rule #1: Cardio
No fatties?
Zombies*
Talk about a failure to communicate.
Not if they’re health conscious aliens!
Haha
Epic Win <3
=D
I think they’re gonna go for the steroids-juiced over-muscled people first. More meat. Nobody wants to eat fat, muscle’s the tasty stuff.
The fat is where all the flavor is. That’s why marbled meat is quite expensive.
Fat just improves the texture. The flavor is in the meat!
Who wants to eat fat? If I were an alien, I’d go to the gyms first.
Yeah, get the bodybuilders ride after workout when they’re nice and tired
Everyone knows muscle wieghs more then fat, gym rats are more filling then couch potatoes
lol…
This assumes that the aliens will land before the great collapse of civilization — when food will be scarce, we’ll all be living off our fat reserves, and the skinny people will starve.
Grammar fail…
Remember, you don’t have to be the fastest to outrun the aliens… just faster than the slowest people.
I thought the zombies were gonna eat the fatties first…
Poor fatties
This is just a guess, but i would assume i taste like crap due to my poor diet. Remember, farmers usually decide what their animals eat. They don’t let the cows eat Doritos and Mountain Dew all day long.
old joke. A fitness club advertised this and got into trouble.
It’s not an old joke, at least not where this shot was taken. I know a prof of mine brought it up about a month ago to start a discussion, and it was still there the last time I drove by.
By “aliens” do they mean illegal aliens?
Illegal? Gimme some cute green antennae and the law be damned. But I’m only 50/50 on the third breast thing.
Since alien abduction is typically what what in the butt, I’m out. But if that’s anyone else’s preference that’s swell.
I think DrB was thinking more in the lines of that green alien chick dancing for Captain Kirk kind of thing.
You just described Roosters fantasy. He’s trying to get me to buy a bikini and green body paint.
Sammy, we should party.
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/e/a/1999/02/16/NEWS1474.dtl
WHOO HOO Ty god for my Gym membership
WHOO = WOO.
Missing punctuation (!).
Ty = Thank.
god = God.
Gym = gym.
Missing final period.
Now I’m going to take a poop.
Ass.
And that, my friends, is why we need stronger border patrol.
http://cheezburger.com/View/3822568960
It fails – for the lack of apostrophes in the words “mens” and “womens”.
OMG, that’s on my route to work LOL
So untrue – fat people are harder to kidnap. You have to take all that extra mass into consideration, especially when it involves a tractor beam and a small aperture.
I should know – I stay fat so serial killers won’t want me.
also aliens are small
Jane- to your last comment: haven’t you ever seen Silence of the Lambs, with Buffalo Bill the serial killer taking all the big girls?!? lol he used their skin because it fit better!!!! LMAO
Lucky for me I’m not chubby
Why eat the fatties? We’re all grisle, but the buffed ones… They’ve got the meat!
This, and that gym, are offensive; not amusing. Fail.
Pls eat me first! I wouldn’t wanna run, hide and be scared anyways, losing friends and family. I’ll even bathe in BBQ sauce…
do u think aliens are members of the cheezburger network?
mmmmmm….. faaaatiiieessss….
Strong people are harder to kill than fat people, and more useful in general.
i think if the aliens are clever enough to get to us in the first place, they’ll be well aware of the risk of hypertension, cardiovascular disease, etc associated with obesity. they don’t want to take over earth just to die of a heart attack.
this was clearly taken from Zombieland… Rule #1: Cardio… originality fail…
This joke is also in Zombieland, only zombies instead of aliens ofc.
win
They stole it from Gold’s Gym it was an old bilboard when I used to live in CA and a bunch of fat people got offended and made then take it down, in my opinion it was a great advertisement, but god forbid you hurt someones feelings. I should start demanding they take down all bilboards advertising any kind of meat product, they’re advocating and encouraging the killing of poor defenseless animals those heartless bastards. (No, I’m not a vegetarian meat=murder=tasty)
Looks like most of you Americans are screwed in this case seeing as the average weight down there is 600 pounds. Stop eating fools.
I’d rather be fat than a pretentious canadian.
GO BAZOW!!! lmao!!!
And Lester…what’s wrong with fat people? When I think of fat people I picture jolliness….food actually releases endorphins which put you in a good mood…like Santa! If you took away his cookies and put him on a diet I don’t know how jubilant he’d be
Actually the Brits are preparing to take that crown away from us.
*T*
(a 145 pound American)
I say why wait for the aliens?
and then there going to eat all the idiots that spend all day in the gym working on their muscles, and not their cardio…
good luck running roid monkies
fatties have too many calories.
When the famine comes, the fatties will starve to death last.
24 hour fitness used that slogan first. They were sued and had to remove their bilboard. I believe it originally said “when aliens come, they’ll eat the fat ones first”
I seriously hope someone lost their job over this. Not funny. Pure fail. The only socially acceptable form of bullying anymore is fat bashing. It’s gotten old.
LoL but it’s still pretty funny!
Not really.
Maybe because he is!
That’s the only form left? really? the laundry list of other ones just evaporated?
I think people need to not be so uptight…if you can’t laugh at yourself, than you really need to loosen up
I’ve been fat and I’ve been thin….and when I decide to dive into a tub full of ice cream I know the consequences….therefore it becomes yet another thing I’ll joke about
Gramar phail oh mah gawd!
THIS IS IN MY CITY!!
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Very informative and interesting post, Great blog.
That’s one way to get some publicity for your store. I wonder how many complaints they had to manage. But like the saying goes, all publicity is good publicity…or something like that.
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