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She helped the dog and now she’s pregnant?
Hard to tell who impregnated her. We’ll have to examine the new-born closely.
Maybe the dog attacked the postman because he was impregnating her. Maybe.
I could not resist. I had to pop my head in for a little while and say hi.
I’m jealous. If I could choose I would give birth to puppies instead of babies.
Sounds painful.
lol….thats good…u shood make another.
haha well funny!!
No one was asking for what the dog did to the postman before the girl tried to “help”.
“Don’t be afraid, he doesn’t bite .. he just want to make love!”
Dog WIN
I would have expected the postman to be F#$*ing the dog.
You can see it on the ears!
did he died?
*hadta*
She’s having puppies!
The dog was sooooo asking for it!
His mouth said “woof-woof”, but his eyes said “yap-yap”?
He shook his head but wagged his tail.
His bark was worse than his bite.
Of course, damn those puppy dog eyes.
Brings a whole new meaning to “screwing the pooch”.
He kept pawing at her.
It’s just how he rolls
over, doggie style.Shagging shaggy
dog or postman?
Ha! Nice angle! I wonder if that’s what the pooch thought?
Or maybe? She asked for a three way and we will find the father’s results on Jerry Springer special episode “The dog vs. Postman”
that’s what you get for trying to help people….
The same thing probably happened to your mum, 18 years ago…
Oh no, you didn’t!
Did he DIE?!
column spelling fail
It’s missing a comma as well.
I’m appalled by all of this! Where the hell are the apostrophes?
Which word do you think is misspelled?
column is spelled colomn in the title
Ah, I see. I was looking in the newspaper.
You should use colomnoscope.
That was the first FAIL I noticed too. I’m surprised Failblog hasn’t gone back to correct their post title.
Doggystyle
Sometimes she likes it rrrruff.
The dog was in a jealous rage. It was sick of the postman emptying his sack around the neighbourhood.
He just has to prove he’s the alpha mailman.
At least nobody stamped this as ‘WIN’… yet.
*resists the urge*
That’s right, you should stick to your post.
Argh, I’m stuck!
*Throws bukkit of cold water on post*
Wildly Inside Naughtybits?
Wanting Insurance Now!
Worst Infedelitous Nightmare!
*cough* -e +i
Nightmari? Not entirely sure that’s the correct plural form there.
Ei on ‘Nightmari,’ in English the most common way to pluralize is to add an ‘s’ or ‘es’ (not an ‘i’ as in Finnish). In this case it would be ‘Nightmares.’ Good to see another Finn on the cheezburger sites!
WIN? Total WIN. WIN! WIN! WIN! I guess it truly is a dogs life.
WIN
Oh jam! *shakes head* How could you make me spit my coffee on my monitor so early in the morning.
*shakes fist*
I’m not sorry! I’d do it again in a heartbeat.
So she helped her dog attack the postman, then had an interspecies threesome, then got pregnant?
Yeah, but I think she loved the dog when she conceived, so it’s okay.
sounds like the twilight saga
WIN
I think it’s fake, I can’t find the full article on the Internets. Link or it never happened.
It’s not fake, saw this in the Sun a few days ago. Article gets better when she reveals that he used sweets to charm her into bed, nice bit of grooming there.
link?
I’m not sure you can get this online, it’s from the Sun’s ‘advice’ column. I saw this on as well,it goes on to say they got chatting and ended up ‘making love on the sofa’ if I remember correctly.
My boss buys the Sun everyday. It’s pretty stereotypical tabloid wank, but I usually read it just for the advice columns because they’re so damn funny.
Please do not forget the hysterical photo stories included in that self same column…….
The photo series have taught me that all of life’s problems occur when you are in your underwear.
……and a lot of problems can be solved that way too!
They’re funny and unbelievable because you’re not supposed to believe them, appreciating satire fail.
So my mum’s dog attacked the postman and yada yada yada…. I’m pregnant.
Seinfeld anyone?
No thanks, I just ate.
Those aren’t buoys!
But you yada-yada-yada-ed over the best part!
No, I mentioned the bisque.
A way of avoiding legal action under the dangerous dogs act…..?
lol, “colomn?”
spelling fail! XD
Ouch. ‘m’ is just the wrong shape to have in your colon
maybe the m is your colon. or at least your rear end.
Bristol Palin says you’re going to poor and lonely and your baby is going to be even worse. Hers on the other hand is going to be awesome. In your face.
You’re going too poor.
I totally want to read the rest of this column..anyone find it anywhere?
I remember reading this quite recently. It’s from the Dear Deirde agony aunt page in The Sun newspaper in the UK.
*Deirdre*
Stupid keyboard!
*Deidre* even!
You got that ‘write’ indeed
Maybe that was reward for saving the dog and the postman…
Well thats one way to tell a story…very subtle.
Once upon a time these guys made a ring. One thing led to another and then Frodo sailed off into the West.
There’s the rear window. There’s the man looking out of the window. He sees the murder. The murderer’s come into the room to kill him, but he’s outwitted him and he’s all right. The End.
There was a sledge.
When he was a kid, this man liked to ride on it.
The End.
Guy loves girl but their families hate eachother. Guy and girl die. The end.
A baby gets kidnapped by the Goblin King.
He’s rescued from a complicated maze.
The End.
A man falls in love with a woman who isn’t his wife, then commits attempted sledicide. The End.
An alien is left alone on the planet Earth. One thing leads to another and the alien returns home.
The End.
She was blind, he was a ruthless drug dealer with a penchant for dolls. She keeps everyone in the dark and he gets gassed up and stuck in a basement apartment. The End.
A baby gets dropped off at the apartment. Three bachelors end up raising her. The End.
I took a little longer than he thought but finally Odysseus arrived at home again. The End.
KS = Keyser Söze – The End
Vicar meets potato. The End
It was the 80s. One thing led to another and we all ended up wearing flourescent legwarmers and snoods. The End.
A 9-year old falls in love with Natalie Portman and ends up being the epitome of evil. The End.
The boat sinks. The End.
Titanic or Das Boot?
LOL
*anklesqueeze*
That, good sir, is a genius summation.
I applaud you.
There was a girl whose mum had a dog. The dog once attacked a postman and the girl tried to help him. then one thing led to another. Now her mom has nine dogs. The end.
FTW..!!
Forget That, Wanker?
There once was a guy whose brother died. One thing led to another and now he’s a big blue humanoid.
@buggy,
nonononono, not quite the end though. The extended AVATAR film doesn’t show up in theaters till August. Then he gets to be an UNDERWATER big blue humanoid. rofl
She yada yada’d over the best part!
And they lived happily ever after…
In a few years, the postman will get chased by a whole pack will get chased by a whole pack!
* sorry for the stammering
Kinda hard to tell if it was the dog or the postman
they´re both known for being poodle-fakers.
Now we all know why Scooby talks………*awkward silence*
I thought scooby talked because Mystery Inc was on LSD… turns out i was wrong.
oh! no, they still were on LSD.
Not to mention Column is mispelled
I Agree, how do we know if it is the dog or the postman.
One thing led to another…isn’t that the most lazy storytelling ever?
“Adolf Hitler flunked out of art school. One thing led to another…and the United States bombed the sovereign nation of Japan.”
Spelling Fail: COLUMN
thanks, COLUMNBO
There’s just one more thing. . .
. . .they spelt column wrong.
Yeah, so… Welcome to the Sun, I guess.
I would so like to read the entire COLUMN.
It has to have more head shakers.
We’ll just continue from where this one left off!
“I’m 17 and my little sister let …”
…the dogs out?
I have been reading all of these posts hoping somebody else picked up the “I’m 17″ part. Did the pedo-postman go after little sister next?
Meh… who cares about that? Someone spelled ‘column’ wrong!
If it’s the Sun, it’s from England. Age of consent is 16.
Age of consent in almost all of the USA is 16 too.
well it’s obviously the postman ffs
Really? It does seem very obvious ffs
doesn’t. Sheesh
The postman always knocks up twice
Failblog retard fail. “Colomn” is not a word.
They could have prevented this if they used a Colomn every time.
“colomn?” I guess that would be a spelling fail
*pours a bunch of fifths*
*labels with “Colomn”*
*safety*
*drinks each time the word is newly discovered by commenting pioneers*
You’re taking my approach now? I warn you, it can lead to disaster.
How is babby formed?
Well, do u expect her to help u out too …
How girl get pragnent?
Sometimes kissing doesn’t make the injury better, but it can feel really good.
I want to see Diedre’s response… o.o
The dog approved of the belly rub and rubbed a little something of his own…*wink**blink**wink*
at least the kid will see his dad every day
WTF? She will have puppies now or little postmen?
You could always say the postman delivered you!
Well, when i grow up, I’m gonna be a postman
Shopped
This is from a fake letter column in the British magazine Viz. Still funny though
Uhm…ha ha, it’s quite funny and… *looks intently curious* does anyone have the full article?
Special Delivery.
i wish she had explained a little bit more of what happened. This sounds like an interesting story.
One of the people who have read this really need to scan it and post it online, or at least type it up for the rest of us D:
OMG, the line below says she’s 17……actually not surprising…Sounds like my town.
the real problem is, that she is 17!
So masturbating to this later.
probably the best part of that gay adam sandler movie was the mailman.
Sometimes he goes through the back door, but he Always delivers.
Nope, in England age of consent, drinking age, etc. is 16.
Drinking age is 18 in Britain. Not that anyone would know given just about everyone under 18 drinks!
Damn you, Kevin Kostner!!!!!
Thing is, that’s actually quite normal for The Sun’s Dear Deirdre column!
i think this is more like a dog epic win
The dog attacked the postman and the girl went to help the postman and since the postman was pissed, she offered herself to him. Now she’s pregnant.
Really !!?
today i was playing hide and seek with my dog, and one thing led to another, and now i think im pregnant