This is why no news is good news
Yes, these were actually printed side by side in the local newspaper.
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This is a black and white situation.
Scenic Drive, you can love it or hate it lol
Scenic died?
So obv: cycling > hiking !!! (clickie)
live it or… be killed by it.
…..and Dead all over?
Not all over. Just Scenic Drive.
I used to live on Scenic Drive.
Yes, sweetie — it died.
Yay!!!
*looks at watch*
Where is Judy and the Cuddle Puddle?
How does a street die?
Dang it, ZA! You have to go and be all logical at a time like this?!?
*starts to sob*
Poor street!!!
My grandfather installed the coin-operated binoculars up there and my father maintained them until 2006. Luckily, I moved away from El Paso several years ago…
how come the NFL is like all black but the quarterbacks are white? are blacks the muscle and whites the thinkers?
It’s for the gay gangbangs.
ahahaaahaaaa
loooool
wait…that wasnt funny
HAHAHAHAH!
why did you even ask that?
It’s not all black and white, there are shades of gray involved.
*squeezes the Shade of Gray*
I prefer Thursday Next.
second
But first to fail, jagoff
Go Canucks!!
Greece bailout!
These are from two different news papers. There is a crease in the right side one, there isn’t in the left, and there is a clear line separating the two down the middle. These are probably from different dates even.
Thought it was funny at first, now think it’s stupid.
Not necessarily. Depending where you live, the newspaper papers aren’t attached to each other but only put on a stack and folded, hence the crease.
~I didn’t even think about that.~
Be nice Leila, they suffer enough carrying all that excrement around inside their heads.
I bet their breath smells like poo, with all of that in their heads.
*blargh*
Failblog diet really works doesn’t it?
Honey sticks, cookies, occasional shots of rum, and the even rarer glass of milk (upon request). I’m not sure what the connotation of “work” is in this context.
*squawks*
Don’t forget the crackers!
more damning than the crease? the dead body story is obviously on the front page of a section–fold is to the left of the story. The other story is on the far right side of its section–you can see the edges of the pages under it. Same issue, possibly. Definitely not right next to each other.
No, this really is the same paper. This is the El Paso times. I live in El Paso, and I saw it myself.
No it is the same one because here in el paso tx (that’s were the newspaper is from) there is two news paper but one is in spanish and this one (el paso times ) is the only english news paper.
Damned if you do… Damned if you don’t.
Dammit.
Watch out sis. She is a bit kinky and has a *GASP!!!* twisted sense of humor!!!
*bites nails*
*doesn’t say whose*
GAH!!! I just got a manicure sis!!!! *sulks*
*stares at Leila’s name*
*stares some more*
*Enters, being dragged by the collar by LGB*
*Also stares at Leila’s name*
*covers lady parts*
WUT??? Why are you guys staring?
*stares even harder at Leila’s name*
*tugs FLB over closer so he can stare harder, too*
I don’t know what you are talking about but you are making me mighty uncomfortable.
So Stoppit!!!!
(I went to post a comment this morning and all my log in info was wiped out. I forgot my full name and just left it at Leila. I don’t do well without coffee.)
I don’t know why this is remarkable. I stare at Leila’s name all the time while I do. . .other. . .things.
My God, I have to find a new boyfriend. I’m growing terribly warped without an appropriate outlet.
DITH! Long time no *squeeeeeeze*
You just need a better BOB… Less hassle than a boyfriend…
Beast of Burden?
Diamonds aren’t girl’s best friend. A vibrator is.
Wait a second, I thought the boyfriend had the outlet.
Leila, curiously I just had to copy my name from my last post and re-enter my email address for the first time in I don’t know how long. So it’s not just you.
As for Scenic Drive, hey I was waiting for the party. 8)
*squeeziesback*
Yeah BOB and ET only get me so far. . . I find staring at Leila’s name with a penetrating gaze works pretty well.
I feel … violated! You should at least buy me dinner before you stare at me DITH!
My info was not there either. I don’t know what’s going on here.
♬ It’s the end of the world as we know it … ♬
It’s a conspiracy!!!!! Next thing you know, we’ll be seeing rainbows from our sprinklers!
My guess is that there is another major change afoot in blogland coming up. Maybe they’ll give us that coveted “edit” function!
Mine was gone. I thought maybe the new girl cleared my cache after I left yesterday.
MsB, you win my “most random comment” trophy today. ROFL!!!
Leila, please to be seeing previous fail
ht tp:// failblog.org/2008/09/08/conspiracy-fail/
I still liked your comment though.
*peeks in*
grinz very toothy.
Don’t be shy, MM… We’re all quite friendly here!
okie… I just can’t figure out where everyone is commenting.. I gets lost. lol
The easiest way to keep track of the comments is by using the links at the top of the page near the fail. See all the little avatars under “Recent Comments”? Click the link beside the names to take you to that person’s comment.
Most important: REFRESH, REFRESH, REFRESH! Otherwise, you won’t see the latest comments and replies…
Refresh early, refresh often.
For that fresh-from-the-fail feeling!
TeeHeeeee!!!! Douchhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!
Doesn’t like that
nosofreshfeeling
btw – ty LGB for the info.. i is new and lost.
*mwuah*
*smooches back*
Here are a few codes you may find useful
. Just put the words between two colons. You can always hover on the smiley to see the code too.
smile =
grin =
sad =
eek =
shock =
??? =
cool =
mad =
razz =
lol=
oops =
cry =
evil =
twisted =
roll =
! =
? =
idea =
arrow =
mrgreen =
twisted is my fav
Mine, too.
Much better than evil.
Evil has it’s place, like when you’re admonishing a nasty troll (bad troll!
).
But
is so much more fun overall, I have to agree.
Yay!
*squeezesherfavoritezombie*
*squeezes peeps*
*squeezesherfavoriteballoon*
SQUEEEEZEFEST!!!!!!
*squeezes every FP within reach*
Yayyyyyyy!!!!!!
*squeezes all present and past fail peeps in one ginormous squeeze*
*SQUEEEEEZE*
*MegaPeepSqueezie*
I can has Cuddle Puddle? Is it time yet? Is it time yet? Is it time yet? Okay, how about now? Is it Cuddle Puddle time yet?
Hmmm…I can’t pathom why that would be. Anyone?
Much better!!!
So, I’m intrigued. BDSM, goth, or both?
Yes and S&M too.
Why can’t it stand alone?
Tell you how much I know about the kinky stuff. Sowy!
Both
Oh, good! I can tell we’re going to get along splendidly…
giggles… I see that.
BDSM, Latex, RolePlay…. yadda yadda yadda…
sweaty and sleepy
She really wants one with fangs.
Um…we have to wait for NS to see if she can donate her fangs.
Nooo, I like NS’s fangs right where they are. I might be able to dig up an extra pair though.
Good idea. Can you grab a few for me too? I don’t know what for just yet.
That’s a bummer!
Ho-Bo(y)! I see where this is going.
Go on a nice relaxing scenic drive of dead bodies, nothing is more relaxing than that.
*Wonders where ZA is.”
He would enjoy this.
Did you look in Scenic Drive?
*Snaps Fingers*
No, no I didn’t!
*Looks in Scenic Drive*
Oh, ZA!!!
I was beginning to think no one was going to show up to this party.
I was there! The party was killer man!!!!!!
One fail yesterday and two from today … all about Texas. The state is a total FAIL!!!!
*Puts Ron Paul and GW in a boxing ring.*
Does that make it better?
No. Nothing can. There should be a way to saw off the state and separate it from the US and just let it float into oblivion.
*Scott Joplin, Buddy Holly, Roy Orbison, Steve Miller and Janis Joplin devour the rednecks.*
*scratches head*
*doesn’t say whose*
Left a bit!
*lefts a bit then rights*
Good?
*purrrrrrrr*
Hold on….Quit Writing on my head!
*pulls out Sharpies of various colours*
What? I’ll just try to match your tattoos.
Ruh-Oh!
I have decided I want a geek tattoo- I was thinking an ammonite, a flower and a diamond.
Geddit?
Nope… seems like a refrence to something I should possibly remember though.
BTW I’ve got a screwed up tattoo on my right arm of the kanji symbols for my name (the real one) all in black. Can those be covered with sometihng else?
Tar would work.
I could remove that tattoo for you. Did you need to keep the rest of the arm afterward?
Classic ZA response! I love it.
*squeeze*
*takes Sharpie™ away from Leila*
Sis! Jeesh!
That’s not how you draw a kitteh! Lemme show you how it’s done…
Put the whiskers on it!!! There. There … and one there.
Whiskers aren’t supposed to go there! That where the…..ohhhhh!
Uh huh!
Direct from my hubby (who used to live there, BTW):
“If there’s a bright center to the universe, Texas is the farthest point from it.”
Maybe they should color their big star black on their flag?
*nods in agreement*
He is a wise man. hehe!!!
Good morning!!!!!!
Good morning to you, too!!!!!
*sistasqueeze*
Leila, would you do that to me? Do you want me to float off into oblivion?
No, wait, don’t answer that.
*flees collar*
*comes back to comment*
You’ve been gone a while and you had to come back when I am trashing TX?
*flees collar*
*comes back*
*Squeeeeeeeeeeeeze*
*flees collar*
That is quite the collection of collars you have Leila
It’s that time of year again and she’s always had a problem with fleas.
*squeezes ZA*
I know my cats have the same problem, I prefer a few drops in their neck, it works better.
*Puts a little Swarovski crystal TX on Leila’s collar with a padlock*
muhahahahahaaaaa
Wow! I’ve never been collared with style before. What’s with the padlock?
So you can never take it off. Never. NEVER!!! muhhahahahahaaaa
Don’t Mess With TX. . .mumbledy mumbledy mumbledy. . .
Maybe we should give it back to Mexico.
No problem!!
*sign, sign pass*
I found the news!
http://www.elpasotimes.com/living/ci_14864734
(Too much time to waste, I like to be indoors)
Well, it certainly is scenic.
In more ways than one.
*squeeze SQ*
If you’ve never been to El Paso – then be glad. El Paso sucks mighty hard. It’s the armpit of the US.
Texas is the armpit of the US.
Okay, if El Paso is one armpit, and Cleveland is the other, who is the crotch of the U.S.?
Planning another road trip Judy?
*readies camera*
* Packs suitcase*
Just looking for a scenic drive.
Do you care if the landscape is not maintained?
Leila, sweetie, you’ve really gotta mow your lawn.
Is it a jungle down there?
The crotch of the U.S…
Brooklin?
I don’t appreciate you sleeping on my desk. I got work to do.
I don’t appreciate your desk being in my designated sleeping area. I’ve got napping to do.
LOL! Well, you know, napping is good for you.
*puts laptop on top of napping TO*
Like I said, I got work to do.
*snoozes away.*
*get’s really warm spot on chest from laptop heat.*
*wakes up*
YEEEEOUCH!!!
Be grateful, she could be giving you the cold shoulder.
Wouldn’t that be more your department, ZA?
Weeeeel, my dad used to say that if the Earth needed an enema, they’d put the tube in Biloxi, Mississippi. He did his Army basic training in Biloxi in WWII.
Close enough to crotch?
Florida? It looks like a naughty thing…
Florida?
refresh fail…
As a Texan, who loves Texas, I can confirm for you that El Paso sucks and it is the armpit of the US.
You’re welcome.
*applauds*
*continues brainwashing*
Now…say why you HATE TX again?
My crazy aunt lives near San Antonio. Is that reason enough?
You do not have to have a good reason to hate this state. It says so on this manual. See?
*shows Avis I Hate TX manual*
I was born in that state you know…
But my family and I moved out before the poison seeped in!
It’s okay Leila, Texas has an ‘I Hate Leila’ manual. But not me. I rub. . .er. . .lub you.
Eh. A fan is a fan. Thank you!!
Give me a break DIH, Texas has a “We Want to Secede Because We Hate EVERYBODY (but ourselves)” manual.
Oh, Leila. You mesmerize me with your ebil fleur de lis!
I am from North Texas. The good Texas. : P
*pokes without paying*
*send a bill for poke to N TX*
I didn’t know there was a good part in TX.
Is your avi a rug? I can’t tell.
Austin is the good part. And Austin is pretty small.
My gravatar is a star decoration on a rug at College Station, TX.
Looks like he got more than he bargained for.
That’s like the time when I saw a TV ad for travelling to Bali in Indonesia, during news coverage of the Bali Bombings there in 2002.
Yeah, exactly like that. Exact.
Like that.
Like this, this, like that.
Take that!
Sideways?
And this!
It’s just a flesh wound!
That is what they all say 8)
Now hold still this might sting a bit.
What are you gonna do, bleed on me?
*lends TO a hand*
*won’t say whose*
The Master does not approve.
You’re right. I don’t.
You really ought to train those minions better,
you know,
I’m just saying….
*hides her own contract behind her back*
Well I tried threatining them with the flameing pit of death. But they enjoy it.
Flaming pit of death?? …
…
…
… oh wait you mean the family BBQ!
Yeah we had such fun last time, and such yummy things to eat. You know Jimmy’s wife, Muriel, she makes a potato salad hmm. I know it goes straight to my thighs, but it just is that good.
“Crime scene investigators were investigating.” ~Ooh, that’s good journalism!~ That’s the kind we have here.
did he diarrhea?
Sh!t, I don’t know!!
giggles
As a Resident of El Paso this is truly a Fail!
These are different papers :/ they are different colours and have different crease lines
This is even more fail considering the police academy is on scenic drive.
Well, it’s El Paso. What did you expect?
Honey, check out this article about Scenic Drive!
What, the death? I’m not interested.
Oh……..boy
Scenic drive is waiting…
for its next victim
hey i live in el paso!!! but it is a pretty stupid city…
Clearly the editor of this newspaper is the killer in question advertising for more victims.
The guy should have stayed indoors.
Give our regards to Jo-Jo.
I think the real fail here is having “El Paso” and “scenic” in the same general proximity.
This.
those werent posted side by side you lieing basterd!!!
The real fail here is the fact that he read the El Paso Times!
I think they should start investigating the writer of the article…
ok, texas is not ideal. hpw bout the great state of maine?
I once danced on a table with someone from Maine … I’m not sure if I saw true rhythm, or if it was just necessary because of the low speed ceiling fan.
how*
i live there :O
Did you hear about this then?
if you look closely they’re clearly two pages placed side by side. making this a failed attempt at finding a fail
El Paso TX. Next to the most dangerous city in the world… Cd. Juarez …
just driving up scenic drive is effin scary! haha
el paso is one of the safest cities on the US and it’s right next to juarez THE MOST DANGEROUS CITY IN THE WORLD! craziness… and you can see it all from scenic drive! ;D
You guys calling this fake are idiots. They’re from the same newspaper, the “El Paso Times”. Okay, they aren’t literally side-by-side but they were in the same April 12th issue.
Look in the El Paso Times archive searching for “Scenic Drive” and you’ll come across the articles next to each other.
Not surprised…El Paso is full of Fail. Lived there for 3 years…and in Juarez, “The Most Dangerous City in the world” for 17 years.
Also, the comment in the left column? WTF??? “El Paso is one of the most wonderful places to live if you love being outdoors.”
Oh, sure: the average temperature in the shade is 90°, year-round, and if the blasting sands don’t get you, the sudden downpours might.
lol i know what you mean i lived there for 10 years.
i remember one summer it was like 05 or 06 it would rain for weeks straight
XD I LIVED IN EL PASO FOR UNTIL 2 YEARS AGO.
I STAYED THERE FOR 10 YEARS….
only in el paso……
I live in El Paso. It has a nice view. But being next to Juarez you hear a lot about people being murdered and not solved.
Also a lot of my friends and others have developed asthma. There are a lot of pollution in the air.