Prepared Police Fail
Prepared Police Fail
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lol.. policemen
The lol police are coming to confiscate your laughs!
Resistance is futile.
All your humo[u]r are belong to us.
And your gunz too.
*ahem*
*points at gun on floor*
*picks up gun from floor*
*shoves it in bra*
…But whose?
Well, now that you’ve asked…Wait. Can I see your ID please?
Don’t you know who I am?
ACK!!!
Don’t you know I suffer from BarackNoPhobia!!!!???!!!
*climbs on the desk*
*snoffle*
No, I didn’t know that. Duly noted.
I would rather stay up here on this desk.
That desk is Obama.
I did not have sex with that man…Monic, erm, Barack Obama.
So you have the fear of lack of Barack Obama? Cause that’s what you just said. ^^
I hope you are his wife in disguise, or it’s going to become very frightening! ^^
I would sooooooo not want to be on Michelle’s bad side!
Must be Emperors Stormtroopers
nuuuuuu ;.;
they are fom romania , city timisoara im from timisoara
)
Ouch, comfies
romaaa gagaga oh la oh lala Oh wait, you meant Romania the country!
I’m from the next town actually, right by the 7-11….
Romanian cops rule!
)
So proud of that, aren’t we?
“Hey, mum, we’re on TV!!” – glad you didn’t spell out their names too.
Romanian cops
)
Nope. BETTER ! romanian policeman
))
i love the efficiency of romanian police. lol
MY FIRST FIRST
YOUR FIRST MEGAFAIL!
Oh, I’m sure it wasn’t the first time Pingas has failed. Nor will it be the last.
Some people are more prone to failure than others.
That accutally caught on, lol. It was just suppost to spark a pun-run.
LOL Suppost!
~Don’t you mean aposta?~
Apasta.
MEGGAAAAAAAAAAA!
Your FIRST FAIL
First of many more to come. ~Cheers!!!~
Being first isn’t as easy as it sounds. But when you are truly first, don’t expect anything good to follow.
Woopsie!
Yeah… very reassuring to see that…
OK, which “woopsie” were you two referring to? The cop who fell on his face or the one who dropped his piece? Let me guess, the town they police is called Keystone.
I thought it was L.A.
no… actually is romania
And why are you sad?! I love this country
) I laugh all day.
God, it’s like the best country to live in. The whole country is so funny, I might die one day by laughing too hard.
Romanina kid in my class who knows a lot of langauges, but gets his english mixed up a bit some times. When he talks its really funny, though his insults kind of suck(He told me to suck a giant blue duck, and then told me to get back in my seat and get a giant stinkbomb). Romania is hilarious1
Yes.
Wooo hooo Granny !!
and skip you, pinkas*.
Meh… the powered by comment was much funnier than the fail today.
Everything by granny is funnier… let’s get him a paddle for the jogging stunt doubles who lose their props.
So what actually happened? I can’t really see many of the videos, they all have serious lag.
Squad of police in riot gear runs by, one of them falling. He gets up and continues, but dropped something in the fall. A bystander grabs the item and returns it to the policeman.
Cue the failblog comment, then granny’s comment, “Just killing time between beatings.” The ad for failbooking follows, and finally the bicyclist gets hit by lightning.
In the sequel they also run into an exploding overpass
The critical point that you missed was that the “item” he dropped was his sidearm.
Do they happen to show how the cop loses his sleeves?
Well, its a bunch of police running. First one falls, then another one drops his gun and a cameraman gives it back to him. Then chief Wiggums stops to look at a menu at a Deli.
Well, ok, maybe Wiggums was not in this one, but otheriwise it’s true!
♫Bad Cops, Bad Caps.
Bad Cops, Bad Cops.♫
*Slides into FLBs post. Takes out A and replaces it with an o. Keep’s o for later, Slides out of post.*
*Bukkit*
About 2 dozen police are running down the street, some with dogs. One falls on his face, few seconds later one turns around to go pick up his gun that he droped about 20 feet behind him.
Thanks everybody!
You would think that a gun might be better secured…
What gun? … Oh sh!t!
Did you lose it AGAIN???
I am sure it’s here somewhere.
*frisks everyone in the room*
The regular one or the Buttocks Bra?
That’s a whole different type of cleavage…
I was looking in the wrong place this whole time.
*blink blink*
*jumps*
Hey! I did not give you permission to tounch me there!
*reaches into bra*
Here it is, Leila.
So, NOW the truth comes out…
Nope, just the gun.
Ok, this is becoming a huge security risk. I’m going to have to ask that all the females kindly remove their bras so that we can make sure there are no more hidden firearms.
Why didn’t I think of that?!The mushroom’s right, ladies. This is a security risk.
*stands with hands on own hips*
Do you really think this is going to work?
*points at Avis*
Agent K@, Take this one into custardy.
*sigh*
My brain is melting today.
On what, charges of possible terrorism?
If you don’t support security, you support terrorism, right?
*flies up to the rafters*
I think I’ll wait up here for a bit.
Mighty Melty Mushy?
For pizza sake LGB, what are you implying?
I don’t support terrorism, but you are suggesting to take away my support?
Nothing. I -erm … nothing.
*chants*
I will not even THINK of nomming my Fail Friends.Fail Friends are not food.One of my Fail Friends might be good sauteed with a nice, juicy steak.Bleh!
*snoffle*
“Breather”
*snoffle*
Holy Moley what have I done now!
Wow. You must really have a bad computer, a video card from 10 years ago would be able to play those video embeds without lag.
Nah, it just doesn’t have a lot of available memory to work with these days. And it is about 7 years old now. It’s a PowerBook G4. It’s a hand-me-down, so it was free. I can’t really complain. Too much.
*snickers*
Yeah, too much…
*giggles some more*
Got that urge again did you?
It kicks in every once in a while. And I’m still on a high from lunch today.
Me too! I got to meet her hubby and mom-in-law too. It was fabulous!
*bounces*
I’d love to meet all the FailPeeps IRL.
I might be able to wrangle something out of my gap-trip in 2012, if any of you guys are East Coast?
Any FailPeeps that expect to be in the Chicago area should let me know! I would love to meet some of you guys!
I’m only going as far west as Sandusky, Ohio.
(Southern Shore of Lake Erie)
Although, isn’t Chicago on Lake Erie as well?
Lake Michigan. But cheer up, there’s the chance that I can travel!
Hee! Not when you find out why I’m in Sandusky, you won’t.
I understand you hate roller coasters, yes?
Cedar Point, Sandusky, Ohio is home to the most roller coasters of any theme park in the world.
I may be able to blag a day trip to Chicago, though. I understand it’s a highly unique city. (And you’re there, obviously)
*turns green*
Roller coasters?
Chicago is great, but it’ll take you the better part of a day just to get here from there! This is two years away, I’m sure arrangements can be made.
No doubt. I think my friend (who is hopefully coming too) also inquired about Chicago, and possibilities of a visit.
Just how far is it from Ohio to Illinois?
On my map it’s only 1 9/16 inches from Sandusky to Chicago. How long can that possibly take?
I think that means it’s at least 150 miles away. But I think it’s farther away for some reason.
It’s 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it’s dark, and we’re wearing sunglasses.
Let’s go.
*guns the Bluesmobile*
lol. penis.
Maybe you should zip up?
…and beat it!
He can’t, he’s still looking for it.
*offers magnifying glass*
Do you think that will help him?
*offers microscope*
Doubt either will help. He needs to look around the part of town where they sell used books and other junk on the street.
So that’s what they sell at “junk shops”.
DW have I ever told you how glad I am to meat someone with your wit?
Is that your best gag?
Actually, it was a very nice compliment…and punny for package deal!
Eep!
*sneaks an ‘a’ up into previous comments*
*bukkits*
Pleh…sauasge!
*fries up a sauasge & spellcheck sandwich*
Ooops, sorry! I just wanted to remind new members to wash their hands before greeting another.
I just cleaned my keyboard, mouse, mouse pad, wrist rest, and phone with a Clorox wipe. Does that count?
Greeting another what Admiral? Finish your sentence!
Gives new meaning to “junk in the trunk.”
It makes me wonder what that company 1-800-got-junk really does.
*snork*
*offers tweezers*
type with both hands, please. might keep your monitor cleaner, too.
Oops!
*Shamwow*
*shudders*
sign sign pass.
Um … do you know what you just signed?
I’m guessing not.
*laughs*
*Snork*
That’s not how you do it?
Perhaps I should have asked [insert celebrity here] to sign my forehead instead…
Romanian police lol
WAY TO GO GRANNY!!
Indeed. That comment was perfect.
*agrees*
Go granny!
Go granny!!!!
*wheels in stainless confetti cannon*
*loads it with naughty shaped confetti*
*
safety**lights fuse and dives for cover*
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!
Congrats Granny!
Yahoo, granny!
*jumps up and down in celebration of granny’s first powering*
*pockets some naughty confetti for later use*
Woopteedoodle Granny!!!
Whoop whoop Granny!!!
*throws more confetti*
Though I’m pretty sure he was talking about something completely different.
*pops the champagne*
GASP!!! No! Not our granny. You are mistaken DW.
*goes to cry*
~NEVER!!!!~
Woohoo, Granny!!!
Holds out glass *clickie* for champagne.
It’s all for Granny.
*starts the bubble machine*
Woohoo! Go Granny!
Yay, Granny! Bottoms up!
*ƃnןƃ ƃnןƃ ƃnןƃ*
You shouldn’t put your bottom up when Granny gets here!
I was hoping for one of his hose comments but this one works.
Woop woop Granny!
It’s a miracle they found one the could put on the front page at all.
*snork*
I think Granny may know a thing or two about unholstered guns.
You’re not associating Granny with a loose cannon, are you?
Granny’s got a loose cannon?
*runs in terror*
WOOT-WOOT, GRANNY!
Woohoo! Congrats Granny!!
*passes lit sparklers around to all the failpeeps*
Go granny!
(Excuse my double-posting eventually)
GO GRANNY GO!
It’s odd, really. If someone came along and hadn’t met Granny before, they’d 1magine a race featuring old women.
Which only makes it funnier when they get to “meet” Granny!!!
awe, thanks guys! you all rock! *dries eyes* so much dust in here
*squeeze!*
stupid romanians
Believe me, stupidity isn’t isolated to any one part of the world.
This comment is destined to power a fail one day, ZA ↑.
Nor indeed stupidity with firearms – down here (in the other ZA) a few years back, a politician’s bodyguard went into the secure room at an airport to check in his weapon. Prior to doing so, the carrier is required to unload. He did so, accidentally, via the muzzle.
Well, that is one way to do it.
Wait a second … the other ZA? There can’t be another ZA. There can be only one!
They actually made fun of Amanda Bynes? The chick’s slate is cleaner than a devout Christian with OCD in a bleach factory!
That’s pretty clean!
*Slips on ski mask*
*Pulls up in van*
It’s recon time.
Sure you don’t have a duel personality, ZA?
WHAHAHAHAHA
BWHAHAHAHAHA
MWUAHAHAHAHAHA
Wow, falling down is one thing but losing your gun?
I actually expected the guy to shoot himself in the foot when putting the gun back in his holster…
They cut out that part of the video.
“I am the only one qualified to handle this…”
*BLAM!!*
That guy was a trooper though. Even after shooting himself in the foot, he wanted to bring out the big guns.
Kids, don’t try this at home. She’s a professional.
You heard that wrong. He said “the big ‘uns”
I wonder what could have triggered them to do that…
Clearly his holster wasn’t locked.
Or maybe he was just loaded.
Well, he was under the gun…
I wonder if they fired him.
Shoot!
*walks away, kicking handguns*
Shell we just leave this one alo…
Hey, wait for me!
*runs after LGB*
*trips*
Oops. Hope no one got that on film.
Sorry, I didn’t know. I just thought it was fitting for the clip.
*click*
Oh boy… I need to work on my clicks and my clickies.
Funny story:
I thought *click* was synonymous with “clickie.” So being the gentlemush that I am and trusting the world’s most famousest buttacow, I clicked it and watched that entire Tiny Toons clip trying to find some reference to my comment. Alas, you were just taking a picture you sneaky little devilcow.
I admit the same mistake.
Elavayor goes down.
Sowy…that was from yesterday’s video fail…
Here you go…
I did the same.
*click*
Hey buddddy. Bring that picture over here and I’ll
rip it to pieceshook you up with an autograph!*gets a copy*
*sends copy to DW’s*
Wait, I didn’t even get to see it… awwww.
It can be a real slippery slope once you start leaving your guns all over the assphault…
or maybe it was just an ass’ fault…
asphalt*
*Bukkit* please!
*hands BF bukkit*
The Keystone Cops rule!
mmmyeeeess….. this is quite embarrassing… not the video, being romanian
But … but …
Your avatar looks … so …
Delicious.
Are you a failpeep?
No, not a failpeep.
Need a fork?
What’s the fork for? He can just rip things and get to nomming.
Funny thing. After clamoring through a collapsed pine box, clawing through six feet of dirt, meandering aimlessly for a while and finally spotting Meals on Heels, the last thing that crosses your “mind” is the question “where’s my cutlery?”.
Yeah, no offence, ZA, but you don’t seem all that proper of a zombie.
*lurks*
*lurks*
*lurks*
*pounces on unsuspecting victim (not anyone on FailBlog)*
*noms through skull*
Have I seen you on James Bond films…?
IDIOT SIGHTING:
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn’t understand why her system would not turn on. A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriff’s office, no less.
I know people like that. They scare me.
What’s scary is that they reproduce.
Or are licensed to carry firearms.
.
.
Or both!
and sometimes become President.
Wow, it feels like forever since I’ve seen you around these parts!!
*squeeze*
Internet breeds short attention span. I just have a quick look at fails and get back to doing other things. Too many comments to keep up with, most not really worth it anyway. And Craig Ferguson compelled my to join twitter so Im trying to keep up with that now too!! I really need about 15 more hours in each day!!
I could use about that much extra time for sleeping.
Sleeping is awesome. I can never get enough. Especially in the morning! But I do everything I can to make sure I get 8 hours every night. It’s probably the only reason I’m still sane. (…. ish)
8 hours may not be enough right now. And it’s getting to be frustrating!
*hands Avis some extra space-time fabric*
If only!! This new medication makes me so damned drowsy! I spend most of my day just trying to keep my eyelids propped open!
Did you take a picture of it and send it into Failblog??
(The power strip, not the reproducing–send THAT to my Adult store!)
ROFL!!! No…this really didn’t happen to me. It was in an email that was sent to me. That’s why I italicized it. I do have people here who wonder why their mouse doesn’t work. PLUG IT IN!!!!
Have you tried turning it off and on again?
Have you tried flipping it upside down?
Are you sure that your computer is plugged in? *Clickie*
Don’t get me started on “is it plugged in”. Some of the people I work with are still looking for the “any” key.
Ah, the folks who can never continue.
And those who don’t think “any key” means any key (including Esc) …
*snorkrofl*
Sorry…just reminded me of a coworker…
Am I the only one who originally read this as cowworker?
*snork!*
It would be appropriate.
Pssst! Gracie…. Clickie!
Ooh, I’m glad to hear that things are doing well! Make sure you don’t drive on that new medication.
*birdysqueeze*
*gives Avis a pillow in case she wants a nap*
I don’t drive EVER. So that’s nothing to worry about!
There are some “fun” other side effects, some of which have reared their ugly heads, but it’s an adjustment period, so hopefully they won’t last.
Hee…
I don’t get it.
*snorkitty*
Just look at my avatar…it’ll come to you…
*pets the snorekitty*
Are they breaking their slide out drink holders too?
Weren’t you waiting for someone to re-plug something in a few weeks ago? I think it was during a rainstorm, or something. Something about a white box, if I recall correctly?
As is to be expected, at my school there is a healthy quota of “Class Douchebag” type people. Generally, they don’t take the same subjects as me, or are in much lower sets, but two of them sit together in Business Studies.
Teacher was talking about his time in Kuwait.
Douche #1: “Where is Kuwait?”
Douche #2: “It’s between Q9 and Q10″
Aprés *facepalm*, I felt the need to point out that 8 is between 7 and 9.
Cue mass ridicule, and the ‘witty’ comeback
“Uhhhummerruhhummerrruhh… W*nker.”
I too find myself fighting the urge to say something when another makes such a silly mistake like that out in the real world. Here at least they can’t physically slap you.
I work in a job where I prevent Darwin Awards. I attack every situation with a sense of dry wit.
You’re not a Fridays&Weekends only Accident and Emergency Doctor, are you?
That’s Darwin Award Prime Time.
I was once told by a boyfriend that I should be careful to keep those comments to myself, lest the object of my derision hear me and slap the daylights out of me. Particularly when I was poking fun at a group of people. He didn’t think he’d be able to hold them all off.
That’s why I learn karate.
Well, I’ve had one lesson…
Well, I’ve learned that my wit is too dry for about 99% of the population. Everybody thinks I’m such a nice guy. It’s funny.
Don’t worry. I don’t think you’re a nice guy.
…Wait, what?
Haha! *squeeze*
I would just end up hurting myself in a karate class. Yes. I am that uncoordinated.
You don’t need to be uncoordinated to hurt yourself in a karate class.
It’s been 3 days since, and I still can’t use my shoulders, abdominal muscles, or quadriceps.
*bows*
Gohon kumite yet?
Hai, Sensei.
Idiots like that will be the first to fall when the apocalypse begins for the simple reason that making them brain dead will actually make them smarter.
It will be for the benefit of humanity.
*snoffles*
Seriously?
Some people…
I love Romania !
Friends, Romanians, countrymen, lend me your… arms?
Oh, just stop! ;D
You came here to bury the Mushy, not to praise him?
The evil that men do lives after them!
Hey, who left this heart in Caesar’s coffin?
Mama said , go to school and trust the police !
this happend in my hometown : Timisoara , from Romania
) like 8 months ago . it was very funny:))))
This happened in my hometown. It was hilarioumous!!!!
That Policeman is on my route to school. I laugh at him every day.
Oops. Butterfingers.
Nutterbutters…
[HOMER] Mmmm…. Nutter Butters. [/HOMER]
I think my child may turn into a Nutter Butter one of these days. She’s quite fond of them. Sensible child.
It’s Romania and..they were filming.
Really?
No, they weren’t really filming. What you saw was recorded from the frontal lobe of a bystander.
Nope. It’s filmed in Timisoara, where the local team, Politehnica had a soccer match with Dinamo Zagreb. The police has been called ’cause the teams’ fans started a brawl in the city centre… Btw it’s my home town
# Janie’s got a gun #
And now we know where she found it!
Tot Banatu-i fruncea… si la prostii.
)
*wheels out the Unidentified Language Translator : Middle Class edition*
Translation:
All buildings are french. Yes, the prostitutes.
Mitica likes to treat all buildings as french prostitutes.
Those french doors are so…
All smiles and banter… if prone. Maybe?
It’s a shame Yakety Sax isn’t playing during this video.
I would think Benny Hill would fit pretty well.
This is happened in Romania…ussually stuff out here
that was soccer game riots!
they were beating “bad blue boys”
they are fans of Dinamo Zagreb
Finally got an avatar, hurray!
Ahh, I see, Accidentaly sent the rating to high for hte picture (I think)
Now it should work(I think)
Yup, it’s working for me. I’m not paying it much though, that doesn’t constitute as slavery does it?
Only if you don’t install a fan in the bag of lays.
Its…… a bear?
Its accutally a house hippo. North American House Hippo to be techincal.
*swaps vcordie’s ‘t’ and ‘u’*
There ya go, sweetie.
Oh, okay after some googling, I get it. Canadian, eh?
Yup. though its a
horriblegreat country. I wish I lived in Wales.You don’t.
Trust me.
Unless you like swimming, everywhere.
Still a bit damp there, is it?
Wales is constantly damp. I’d say there’s never been a day when Wales gets no rain.
I would not survive long there. I need sunlight!!!
It was sunny here today! For a bit…
I even got to wear my shades!!
*squeeze*
I wore my shades anyway! I’m a pretender…
Thanks bouche. Ill keep that in mind. Its a new day today, and I’ll be fine today. That accutally was inspirational. Also, I wasn’t hurt, just a combination of frusteration/wtf.
I love swimming, and I love the rain. Education system’s nice their as well, and theirs lots of sheep. I love sheep. And the green fields and the trees….god I wish I was back in wales.
There. There’s. [wales/sheep joke goes here].
*sigh*
Qwazzy. Have a look at this ↑.
It’s starting to make my left eye twitch…
*Continues past post*
… lf of it first.
Echo… echo… echo… Pinch hitting for Pedro Borbon… Manny Mota… Mota… Mota…
And he’s the best in his class.
Makes you wonder doesn’t it?
Supports my theory that as technology advances, the decreasing need for human fitness and intelligence causes a natural devolution.
I type too goddamn fast. *Sticks post-it note reading SPELL-CHECK BEFORE POSTING COMMENT on forehead*
I just … I mean, I didn’t write that way when I was that age, did you? Didn’t you know the difference between “theirs” and “there’s”?
You know you can set the computer to spell check for you? It won’t help with homonyms, but it would be a start.
You need to watch your language too, vcordie. I’m surprised the moderators didn’t catch that.
There are ladies present…
Yup. And I do distinguish the two. I try to keep them straight, and I can’t find in instance that I’ve mixed them up commenting on Failblog yet.
“Why are you calling me Dr. Heimlich? We’re married! Stop being so bloody Prussian.”
I’ve had this argument hundreds of times, and I don’t think damn is a swear word. But I’m frustrated because whenever I post, 5 semi-hate comments follow by the people I’m trying to fit in with. The problem is I type how I talk. With a lisp.
and, vcordie, if you can’t find any instances of that, then you evidently don’t understand.
@vcordie:
ht tp://failblog.org/2010/03/03/prepared-police-fail/#comment-809622
Take out the space, or the link won’t work.
No, your right. I don’t understand. Quit bashing on me, What the hell have I done wrong?
Hmm your right. How did that one get past me. Whatever.
Nothing completely wrong, really.
We just take pride in our blog is all. Ever heard the phrase “Tough crowd”? That’s us
Also, we come from two entire different countries. I only started to write well since I got my laptop 2 years ago, since I have a fine motor skills disability. So pardon my grammar. The teacher’s were in massive learning disability denial.
You’ve confused third-person possessive “their” with preposition “there”. Twice.
The penalty is death by comfy chair.
I’m going to shut up now, and just look at the pictures. I’ll calm down and relax, since I got a MtG tournament coming up. Enough bashing already. I’m not talking till tomorrow.
Can. Hardly. Wait.
LOLZ — we’re not “bashing” you, vcordie. We’re trying to soften your landing here… Constructive criticism.
Bad mushy! Bad!
*tiny booponacap*
I get the learning disability thing, I have one too. But I also had to realize that having it meant I had to work extra hard to get things right. So, I try harder (no pun intended), and I’ve progressed a lot. Even since coming to this site. Commenting here lets me work on some of the skills I needed help with when I was younger. There is always room for improvement.
*stares wide-eyed at LGB*
*bottom lip quivers*
*eyes well up*
*scoops-up lil’ mushy*
*rubs cap gently*
Awww, I’m sorry! I thought you’d laught ’cause I did the “pre” comment afterwards…
*hands blanket and hot chocolate*
We okay?
*eyes start to well-up*
*sniff.sniff*
*shakes away fake tears*
ze plan verked!
*drops mushy in a heap*
*starts to plan barbeque*
Which is your best side?
Ahum, speaking as sort of a regular: I think we should be more tolerant towards spelling and grammar mistakes. We formed our own little community here on FB and the regulars found eachother in their love for language and humour. We set a certain standard for spelling and grammar but musn’t forget that out there in real life we’re a minority. Depending on the occasion a lot of people use a more or less formal English. Newcomers on FB may not always understand what is expected from them. Furthermore, we don’t own FB. If tomorrow a group of people decides to form their own community here with unwritten rules different from ours, it’s not up to us to shoo them away or reprimand them. Finally, we should learn to accept the generational differences, both in usage of the language and behaviour.
You’re absolutely right, czuhc. *squeeze*
It just got bottled-up, I think — he’s been posting for the better part of the day…
and I tried to do that, but instead I get hate for not talking like I had university/Highschool english. To try harder people need encouragement, not bashing and eye twitches.
vcordie, we’ve been giving you encouragement all day. Everyone has really been trying to be patient with you. To be fair, this is a very tight-knit community — just “jumping into it” is kind of difficult. You need a pretty thick skin here. That’s why it’s pretty much best left to people who have had to build one over many, many years… We’re adults, for crying out loud! Most of us are in our 30s and 40s!
To try harder you do need encouragement, yes. You also need to acknowledge the issue and inform the rest of the group that you are trying. And you have done that. We don’t coddle anyone here, but I think we can dispense with the bashing.
Getting super defensive about anything here (regardless of what that might be) can backfire on you though. Believe me, I oughta know!
@ lgb *squeeze*
That makes me happy.
Welcome to vcordie (just go easy in the beginning. Try to get the hang of it).
I’m off to bed now, hope the 80000 people I’m responsible for will let me sleep.
Good night!
Sleep well, czuhc!
Vcordie, (if you read this) some of us are college drop-outs, etc. I have noticed that since joining this blog I have become more of a stickler in grammatical misuse. (One that has really come forth is using “good” instead of “well.”) I have also expanded my knowledge-base on various subject thanks to the glory of pun-runs. *Squeezes Failpeeps*
Here’s a good lesson: I get my @$$ handed to me every day by people who want to blame me personally for the fact that they don’t know how to plumb. To attempt something you should know you’re not capable of is sheer stupidity. (But this isn’t my point.)
The point is, you will have to deal with people like that in basically whatever job you do. You will encounter drama, and no, life does not get easier. When you encounter stupid people, bombastic discourse and grammatical perfection can give you the upper hand. It sucks right now, but it will help you out in the future. You had better start callousing up, otherwise the world will chew you up and spit you out.
Sorry to be so honest.
Hey now, ironically enough, some of the best humour comes the great land above me. They also have some of the best folk bands.
I have one of those!
Grr, it didnt work. stupid gravatar xD
…it works.
Surely a child prodigy with a fledgling career in web-dev already knew that. He/she was just testing us.
Note. While it may work you for, I had to clear my cache first.
*For you.
*Bukkit*
You’re going to need a much bigger bukkit.
Ahh, **** me sideways. **for you*
*Cauldron*
I’m not so sure that’s what he meant…
Well then im clueless.
As if.
You can’t be the absolute and final word on drivers’ licenses!
Girlie, as far as you’re concerned, I am the messiah of the DMV…
Do you like Billie Holiday?
I love him.
Why should I listen to you, anyway? You’re a virgin who can’t drive.
That was way harsh, Tai.
Don’t be a troll, Mush. Vcordie, what they’re saying is that your spelling and grammar need a lot of work. Not to be harsh, or anything, but we pride ourselves on using proper grammar and spelling.
I don’t want you to take this the wrong way, I’m not trying to by hypercritical. You just need to work on it, ok?
Sorry, Mushy. I missed that reference.
s’ok Gracie-Facey!
*squeeeeeze*
I try my best. Its a big improvement over last year, and I honestly, other then the spelling mistakes, I don’t see any grammar issues. Kindly point them out for me? It’ll allow me to improve.
*Swaps You and For*
You’ll learn that a good cache cleaning is everything.
*Enrolls in refresher course*
Im so used to clearing my cahce 18 times a day since I normally use wireless, but since im at school im using a land line. Also, firefox on my home computer also clears cache and cookies every time it closes.
Also, really sorry about the _trollish_ comments on the last fail, I didn’t get the entire failpeep thing before someone linked me to the faq. For that, We thank you.
Hey, it’s all good. We all make mistakes. Just be funny, not hurtful and beware of the fooming.
We?????
Oui.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
I’m schizophrenic
And so am I.
That makes me laugh every time.
I laugh too.
Our three selves are amused.
We *snorked* as well.
Fool, everyone else said something to that effect.
It’s not our fault it was funny…
Quiet, imbecile, they’re listening now.
By we I meant everyone other then the op of the faq. since if the person haven’t of told me about the faq, the confusion went of went on longer. So hence the we
The confusion continues, believe me…
*pulls hair out*
*doesn’t say whose*
*apologizes to Mushy*
*doesn’t say why*
MAKE IT STOP!!!!!!!!
*runs around thread screaming her head off*
AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!
*picks up Leila’s head*
I feel your pain, sweetness, but you’re going to need this. We all need to keep our heads in moments like this.
I suppose.
*sigh*
*straightens hair*
*puts head back on*
*SqueeeezeDW* Thank you.
Here, Leila and Dragon, have a cookie!
*proffers tray*
NOM! NOM! NOM!!!!!
*licks fingers*
Thank youuuuuuuuuuu!!!
*Pinches face between hands*
Doctor! My brain hurts!
*blinks*
You want to try that one again?
You might want to pray to St. Jude Avis.
I think you may be right.
This may even be above him… :\
????????
ERROR CODE 42 – UNABLE TO COMPREHEND.
*Looks at post*
*C0cks head sideways*
*Makes it no better*
Now you know what we’ve been dealing with here for the better part of the day, sweetie.
*squeeze*
Your patience is remarkable!
*Squeeze*
We?
*have made*
Suzie and I are questioning how many people make up vcordie!!!
Over 9000. Sorry. That was really, really, really bad.
…
*Clickie* Now what was the first thing I told you…?
I accutally don’t work in the body of the code. Im the spirit of the project. I think up the ideas, organize everyone into a team, set people to tasks, and work with external labour. I leave the code up to my good friends who know a good number of languages(one knows 4, other knows 14), and are 15, Who do the main work till im brought up to speed in coding and can be set to smaller tasks.
Bill Gates would be so proud of you.
*RIGL*
Do you suppose that he was making up all the problems he said he was suffering from? I mean, if it was all a joke, I will be very pissed because it’s nothing to laugh at. I have friends who suffer from bipolar, ADD etc.
Its honestly not a joke. I take Ritalin and Apo-Imipramine.
Well, that seems to be a trend of late…
…is this aimed at me? If so, it is really NOT funny. Yes, I may not come across as massively depressive all the time, because biploar disorder doesn’t work like that, and generally you guys cheer me up.
I’ve scrolled past this comment enough times to try and ignore it.
I’ve been working really hard on learning the language’s I need. I do perform a essential part of the team though.
It’s a good thing coding doesn’t require good grammar or proper sentence structure.
So what do you kids code in lately? C++? Powebuilder? Java?
I’m still working with Hammurabi.
I am perfecting my Suahili.
My zombie sense indicates he’s coding in bull, but what do I know.
The “spirit of the project” is typically the local wasteoid, who hangs out on the couch and says things like “dude, it would be so kewl if it did that!”
And we should have, like, buttons, and you click them and they play cool videos or something!
Coding in bull? *Clickie*
It’s… a lot of dots.
Only if you go to the homepage. Any login will do, doesn’t actually check anything,
It’s fake, I can see the pixels.
TextSpeak.
[lol yeah cya l8r x]Run: lmao.exe[/idk lol thx anywy x]
kewl!
O noez lol u jst brke the intrnt!
Sry, nxt time Ill try 2 b more carful!
Ah, did u typ ggl into ggl?
Text speak bothers me too.
I was brought up in the generation of anti-grammar.
I understand this crap, but I avoid using it (in a genuine situation) like the plague.
I skip over it entirely. I can’t read it, I can’t understand it and I really don’t want to. I have better things to do than to try to learn a new language that’s based on abusively thrashing a language that’s existed for centuries.
Not to nit-pick but this language that we are currently using hasn’t really existed for centuries. At least not in this exact form. It shifts, I just don’t really want to see it slide down the drain!
You’re right, LGB.
It’s “neway” Jon;. “N-e-way”
*sobs*
For the love of Pete! Have pity!
*reaches out hand*
*takes pity*
*doesn’t necessarily love Pete, though*
*Throws pity up in air, pity comes down like confetti*
It’s a pity party!
ooooo, can we load it in the cannon?
If you’d do the undead honors.
I considered that, and decided that “l8r” is the farthest I’ll go. I have limits on that sort of language.
We’re accutally trying something completely different, making a game in javascript.
*swaps vcordie’s ‘u’ and ‘t’ again*
*nods*
vcordie, it’s: A-C-T-U-A-L-L-Y. Actually, not accutally.
AccuTally™
For when you absolutely positively need something counted right.
1, 2, skip a few, 99, 100!
I totally forgot about that!
Finally I have the upper hand I was looking for in hide-and-go-seek!
Wait. I thought we already covered this — YOU HAVE NO HANDS!
*pant.pant*
*wipes brow*
*faints*
*hops over to LGB*
*tilts head to right*
Do you need … a fireman?
*tilts head to left*
*snorekitty*
The mental pic for that was priceless, Avis!
LOLZ!
I had hoped it would come across as funny!
One … two … five!
Alright, Ill remember that, thanks.
Also, I try my best with grammar and spelling. Im WAY better then the other kids in my grade.
Oh dear.
(S?)He’s 13, Avis.
That’s the educational system equivalent of 8-ish.
*Ahem*
What’s fourteen translate into?
That depends on the individual. ENTIRELY.
…and on the avatar.
In YOUR case, Qwazzy, it’s ~30.
I’m good with ~30!
Still, I’ll stick with apple juice for parties.
Qwaz is 14?!
Crikey, I thought you were a grown man. ~30 sounds about right.
Can’t judge a book by its cover can you, Jon?
At least not if the cover is well spoken, intelligent and witty.
Quaz is sticking to apple juice at parties and some of us are returning to apple juice at parties.
So why does that seem so wrong?
*lower lip trembles*
You’re … you’re … you’re giving up drinking?!? Seriously?!? :[
It goes straight through him, being undead and all that.
Does apple juice go well with brainzzz?
*Pictures a brain floating in apple juice*
That’s actually not even a revolting thought.
(^ Note lack of tildes.)
To clarify this up front, Its a HE.
He’s an it?
It is he who is it?
Then who is the Eggman?
Sonic’s greatest enemy
I don’t know, but I heard that I was the walrus.
Koo-koo-chi-koo.
*Steal extraneous apostrophe*
*adds to ‘ sculpture*
Clear your cache. Then refresh. That should do the trick.
Lol thats in Romania Timisoara (thats were i live) ..the video is acctualy taken in Piata Uniri and the Police was in a practice Test or something like that:)) this video was here all over the news:))=))
that wan’t practice . They where running after some fans from a football team
.
Romania … “the land of choice”. NOT. It’s a beautiful country, too bad it’s being inhabited.
I love cooked poop with ketchup!
Do you like brownies with mustard?
Watch your step(s).
lol understand this language o_o ^^
Yesterday I had a nice trip to see the movie Avatar. I thought it was decen
dmovie.lol i love it how the cop tells him like “thank you” xD
If these were my local police, think I would rather call the Ghost Busters.
o.O You are all some very strange people. Veeery strange…
Ruh-roh — nesting fail or blog bork?
Grrrr! Try it again, sweetie. Send me a message, though, so that I know who you are on Fail Blog. (That’s how I keep track of the Fail Peeps.)
Wow, okay. I think we got it.
I might suggest the same thing for any who’ve sent me friend requests. If I don’t recognize the name, I don’t confirm.
On behalf of us all, thanks!
*kicks comment up there ↑*
If its me your talking to then your all very welcome.
If not then… well… ya
Yup, it was you!
All FailPeeps raise your right (wing for you DW) hand please. Repeat after me.
I promise not to make Leila laugh to the point where she is spitting chewed up peach, coffee, tea, etc. on her poor monitor going forward, so help me PTB.
Slow down! You are posting comments too fast!
Yes mom!!!
Oh…wait.
*looks at wings*
*looks at Leila*
Ummm….
ACK!! *smacks forehead*
All FailPeeps raise your right (wing for you DW and Avis) hand please. Repeat after me.
Go ^^ for the oath now.
*sorries*
I think I can go along with Jon’s oath….
Yeah…I didn’t think any of you would take the oath. I was hoping though. Just hoping…
Aw, I gots no arms so I gots no hands.
*lends mushy a hand*
Will this do?
*inspects*
*checks*
*weighs*
*licks*
*measures*
Yep. This one will do just fine!
That was really sweet and generous of you LGB, but did you have to lend him my hands?
*rummages through “storage”*
*gets his spare pair*
How do you…type?
You know what little Mushy? Don’t tell me.
*giggle*
Yes, better left to your i magination, LeiLei.
Neither do Nightshayde, SuzieQ, or LCB!!
Wait, what?
*arms LCB*
*rifles AA’s drawers*
*gives LCB a round of shooters*
*aims to please*
Have hands. I thought that you had paws.
I think I’m kind of a hybrid kitteh/person/cartoon character. You never know what you’re going to find at the end of your, um, arm or leg or whatever it is at the moment.
Hmmm. A cause for paws.
A paws for thought?
*very pointedly keeps hands at side*
*whistles*
Hmmm…I can see this is not going to work the way I would have like it to.
*poke*
*poke*
*poke*
*tickle*
*buys condom for monitor*
*poke*
*giggle*
*giggles*
*is very glad she didn’t take a sip before reading this comment!*
I never drink and blog, for this very reason.
You see???? You need an oath like that too. Admit it little birdie!!!
Any beverages consumed by me whilst blogging are most likely to come out of my nose. I don’t think I’ll care much at that point about the computer.
Have you ever shot beer out of your nose?
It’s not pleasant.
Neither is orange soda.
I have a funny feeling that Leila’s temporary absence may be a result of a ShamWow-fetching trip.
To plug up her nose?
*snoffle*
I was thinking more towards the clean-up end of the spectrum, but prevention is best, I suppose.
*Raises lobe*
I promise… Wait!
*Leafs*
I’m more of a left-wing gal, myself.
I think it’s a “shank”?
*looks at paw*
*looks at LCB*
*is confused*
Think beef cuts. Or else LCB is talking about jail-house weaponry, which I doubt.
Heavens! Are we into the shank of the evening already?
Oh, I was just channeling some old Peanuts cartoon. Lucy says something about not wanting to touch Snoopy’s “paw or shank or whatever it is” and the last frame has Snoopy looking at his outstretched leg quizzically and thinking “I think it’s a ‘leg’!”
Or something like that. You had to be there. Clearly you weren’t. I may not have been either.
What was the question again?
What year did Columbus set sail?
There’s a restaurant near me bearing that year as a name. Tapas place. Good food, good prices, terrible service.
Two out of three ain’t bad, and you got the best two.
More than thirty minutes between ordering and eating is ridiculous! But, it was 1/2 price on bottles of wine that night! It could have been worse.
Now if I was in the least a cynical person, which I’m not, I would say that they were charging you double to begin with. Happily I am not that sort of person.
Even considering that restaurants double charge you, this was a really good deal on the wine.
Part of my deal that night was I hadn’t eaten at all that day. I think I even blogged about it. That would have been about the time I told the interwebs that Mama Bird and I are actually friends.
It’s a good thing when you actually like your parents. A couple of months before he died dad said that he thought of me as a friend as well as a son. What more could a son hope for?
Not much. I think it high praise that Mama Bird thinks of me as a friend!!
*squeeze*
We are indeed lucky.
It’s a trick question. Columbus, Ohio is land-locked.
Wrong! Columbus didn’t set sail. His crew did.
Dang!
Ok. I’ll try “Misheard Lyrics” for $1000, please.
Yup, beef cuts.
My grandparents had a ton of those old Peanuts comic books, while I don’t remember that one, it sounds like one that could have been in one of them.
I promise to provide Leila with alternate beverages to those which she is currently coating her monitor with, so that she may have some variety in her *snork*ing.
Jon, I just don’t know how to thank you.
*TackleSqueezies*
*oofSqueezies*
Now, Orange Juice? Water? biscuits? milk? Piña Colada?
Yes please. Gimme! Gimme!!! GIMMEEEE!!!
*pours Leila a glass of Piña Colada*
Now remember.
1. Drink
2. Stop and SWALLOW IT
3. Safety
4. THEN Blog
5. Repeat.
I also promise to secure the reply button with a safety rope in future, because for some reason my comment has floated away from all the others…
I’ll drink to that.
*checks nesting*
*looks totally confused*
The poice are really falling down on the job these days…
This is just grace, they take too many trips.
I wouldn’t have picked up the gun. I would have waited for them to be gone. Then picked up the gun with a glove.
Now I would have the ability to shoot someone, and let the cop go to jail for it. And you know who would get it. ^^
All these stupid romanians are proud when they see their policemen failing
*Horaw*
Sign sign pass.
It’s not just a fail, it’s art. Have you ever seen policemen failing like that? It’s just… perfect.
this guys are from romania , city timisoara
im from timisoara 
))
GO GO ROMANIA
Unprepared police win?
Uhh…. no, no that isn’t. But it sounds as if you might enjoy that.
First
Come now, you’ve been around long enough to know that’s not true.
I think a fail twist would be, arresting the reporter for illegal possession of firearms.
Let’s see five examples. Go!
Why would we want that? Now his braaaiiinnnzz are splattered all over everything and not contained in a nice, bowl-shaped skull.
*helps*
duplicate FAIL
The Vote page doesn’t count.
I thought that was only in Florida.
Votes REALLY don’t count there!!
I just left a comment on your blog and it cut most of it off. Now it makes even less sense then when I wrote it. A perfectly good run on sentence shot to pieces.
I just replied to it!
Hee!
…and sometimes Ohio.
If anyone else is also watching Criminal Minds right now, the kidnapping lady looks remarkably like my step-mother. Mean and evil looking.
I get enough exposure to criminal minds on FAILblog.
Did you hear the news out of Hollywood? They are going to make a feature film out of Gilligan’s Island. No joke.
So who’s up for the title role?
The producer of the series is the executive of the movie and does indeed have someone in mind. They said the guys name, but it meant nothing to me. Try this link (I just googled it) forum.rifftrax.com/index.php?topic=14432.0;wap2
What I was able to google on my own was Michael Cera, who would probably do very well. He’s the guy who played the male “romantic” lead in “Juno”.
I have yet to see if he can do good physical comedy though.
” Excuse me officer, you dropped your gun.. “
Last!
First, sorry to the guy above me.
Second, you’d think the police would be using better gear, wouldn’t you?
Romanian police rulzzz
@Mandaloin: Nothing is better in Romania.
this isn’t good publicity for romania but its’t too funny, i’m from romania, the cops are just too fat and too stupid, but this is the country we live in, and we can’t chage it, soo many fails are from romania, the cop actually had to be helped by the cameraman to recover his gun
)
What are you talking about all of ‘em except traffic cops are at least like 6′ and well fit. I tried outrunning a cop on foot once when I was drinking a beer in the park (public place – to prevent the small fine) and I totally failed, even though I’m pretty fast myself. When caught I was stuffed into the police van went to the police station and they had my prints taken along with a larger fine. Turned out to be a bad decision lol.
Can I keep the gun, please? Please let me keep it!
this is why when i policeman asks for my id i laugh in his face
YEAH,from Romania,but i think it was a drill
Romanian Police in action
)
What a lovely home-country I have.
Only in Romania…. the police force is very weak they need master Yoda to learn how to use the force…
damned, they are from romania =))
Romania cops..Salut Romania!..
I can’t believe it!
) Those are Romanian policemen 
) FAIL!!!
at least he didn’t dorp his pants as well….i love romania, i love my country, we are sooo funny. and maybe they will shoot The Police Academy 8-100 here
)
prea tare filmuletu. nu mai pot de ras.
)
I was actually starting to wonder when there’ll be a fail from my lovely city over here. hahah. lots of romanians commenting around, i see
)
maybe there might be a fail in Ohio. So you won’t have to feel embarasssed if so. (: I’m new here. Hi….
domnu’ politist s-a turmentat, s-a turmentat, stiu ca e pacat, dar i s-a intamplat…
Romanian police to be more precise.
Hopefully it was on safety.
men vs robots.i’ll stick with the former
Romania >:)
numa la noi…
Ca bine zici
)
If I may make a suggestion: use a pistol lanyard.
Romanian cops! the best
)
noah, de cate ori trebuie sa apara clipul asta pe failblog?
//en: well, how many times this clip should appear on failblog?
Romanian police at duty
Lol, they are fom romania !!!
)
Yey Made in Romania XD
Gotta love the romanian police assault squad
)
Welcome to Romania!
In Romania you don’t run away from cops, the cops run away from you!
elite squad
)))
Politisti domne’ nu asa…
Romanian cops … we CAN live without’em!
LOL only us the romanians can do this lol
it’s my country..:))
Romanian police in action =)) =)) =))