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mykitty
pffft!
Google: /load/epic_fail/fail_pictures/fishing_fail/8-1-0-95
Happy caturday!!1
Cat got your tongue? Starts with the lip.
And ends with a bad feline?
where’s the fail?
It has to do with your name, the portrait in the background, and redshift.
The fail is the manner in which the guy is getting his lip pierced. What’s next… the nose?
Look really really close.
the cat made a hole in his lip
Bah Gawd, It’s The Mandible Claw !
More evidence of the difference between a cat and a comma.
A comma gives you pause, but a cat’s paws have claws?
…pause to your clause…
The version I first heard was “A cat has its claws at the end of its paws; a comma has its pause at the end of its clause”.
I has a bucket!
There once was a man named “joes father”
with upper-case he did not bother
and said fiddle-dee-dee
to the apostrophe…
… which others to use would rather?
mygod you are a genius AFV. i am going to print your words out and rub them all over my body and hope i have your word babies.
<3
which goes without saying, of course, that it’s a threesome, really….i wouldn’t leave mouse’s insanely clever replies out.
*squeezies even if i’m losing my mind?*
*click*
*mails to DW*
Cat WIN!
Lips FAIL!
Jacket NOT PARTICIPATING!
Big OUCH.
Small YAY!
I wish every enumeratroll met a cat like this one.
*sign, sign, pass*
อุ … = =
These modern piercings are weird.
They certainly are a cat-astrophe.
now thats a play on word lmao
Ah, but the method is organic.
And it’s totally feral. Oops, I mean sterile.
Everyone has their pet peeves.
At least that one isn’t named “Prince Albert”.
*Ring*
Hello?
Do you have Prince Albert in the can?
Yes we do.
Is it a piercing or is the cat doing a waddle surgery?
Awww, c´mon, you have not heard frome the widespread use of cats as Dentists… it´s just the check-up visit
(now imagine if you fear dentists and cats^^)
This is not a fail. It’s just a pissed off cat. Move it over to lolcats where it belongs. Seriously, who’s doing over-watch for this site?
I’ve you’ve been on FB at all in the last several weeks/months you will have noticed that they’ve failed many more times than just this one.
Why do you care?
I doesn’t effect you in any way…
And neither does E.
Oh, nice. You just pissed on the fail.
That might work for claiming lolcat territory, but around here you have to lick the fail to mark it as your own.
The moment you start taking Failblog that seriously… I don’t know what happens.
You get fatally verbed by adjective wordplay.
Ooh, madlibs!
“You get fatally [blended] by [purple] wordplay.”
bamf
Can WIN!!
Can? I can see no can…
It’s the can do attitude of the cat.
Yes we cat!
Catch as cats can!
Can’t a cat cancan?
Another case of photography timing WIN!
And also; photographer FAIL! Help the man first; then take sloppy snapshots…
I think he was the one taking the picture.
That actually kinda makes it worse…
No camera, no pain.
Pictures or it didn’t happen.
A picture’s worth a thousand words, most of the words attached to this one being “OUCH!”.
That is one of the words that came to mind upon seeing this picture. The rest I can’t use here because the filter won’t allow it.
It’s not !maginary! It’s real, I tell you! REAL!!
*runs away crying*
I never got why !magine and all modifications of it are filtered out. Cus words, I get. !magine, I just don’t understand.
*takes picture of the confused face*
*posts on internet to see how many words it’s worth*
*counter rolls*
*DING DING DING!*… 42!
!mag -> (from !mage) is often used in direct links to “18+” pictures, usually to bypass filters, so FB thought they’d go 1up on that.
AHHHH! I see clearly now that all that rain is gone.
I thanketh thee, Jon;.
I intend to play that song at my step-mothers funeral. Along with “Ding Dong the Witch is Dead” and “Holier Than Thou”.
No, we don’t get along, why do you ask?
*snork!*
That my be why her cats don’t like you. She might be trying to get to you through the might power of a cat’s claws.
Not her cats. My step mother lives in another state. My mother lives in the building next to mine.
Easy mistake to make though.
That had to be very precise timing. I bet the photographer intended to catch them just at the moment where the cat got kissed, and was already pressing the shutter button when the cat got pissed off instead.
I cannot believe how much that cat looks like ours, who, sadly, died a few months ago at the age of 18. Though she never did anything like this.
I bet the cat did not stop there I bet it went over his head
You appear to have gambling issues. I’ll take both bets.
I’ll take the first bet. The second is a long shot…
This is why it shouldn’t be considered inhumane to de-claw cats. They can not be trusted.
I beg to differ. Claws are what a cat uses to defend itself. What recourse does it have if you take them away. Treat the animal with respect and you will have no problems. You would keep bothering a dog if it showed signs of being annoyed, would you? Or would you have the dogs teeth removed?
n’t ^
*Bukitts*
Well, as the owner of cats, I can tell you that even without front claws, the felines hold their own against the canines in this house.
What house are they living in that they constantly need to defend themselves? Or are they opening up the canned fish with their claws?
I’m not a cat owner by the way so perhaps theres something that im missing?
It’s not just claws you remove, you remove the first knuckles, which is why it’s inhumane. Not removing your fingernails, but the tips of your fingers?
I hate when cat lovers say that “ahmagawd its a bone!”
Look at a diagram of a cats toe. Yeah, technically the nail ends in a bone, but its like they have an extra digit. Take off that one, and they end up with the same number in that toe as a human.
I personally would rather smoothy remove a whole “end” unit at a knuckle joint than cut THROUGH a bone and take just the nail.
BTW had a declawed cat, who was a litterbox pro and had no prob. Ignore the “ohmagawsh thats so cruel, ignore my leather belt and shoes” people.
~Everyone should absolutely band together and fight for their right to be lazy and avoid all that tedious effort to train away undesired behavior when a handy mutilation will have the same results with way less investment of time and energy!~
How would YOU like YOUR distal phalanges removed?!?! Do you know how ofter it goes wrong? Do you know how incredibly painful it is for the cat? A pain that lasts the rest of her life! Being uncomfortable on the front paws can cause arthritis in her hind legs! Not to mention the permanent severe emotional trauma! De-clawing is illegal in many countries like England and Australia! What do you mean “Oh it’s OK to rip her distal phalanges off”? How could anyone do that to a cat? Anyone who does is a MONSTER
but they are cats not humans that ‘extra digit’ its unnormal for them maybe towards a human its specified as an extra digit but not for them… besides as a vet assistant i was taught that it can give pain for the rest of their lifes and make it feel wrong and weird…. like something is wrong with their front feet… which in the end makes them put more weight and pressure on their back legs which can cause deformities and also make them lose their balance ehich would make them not as likely to end up on their feet and if you have ever seen a cat jump or fall they always land on their front feet first so if thats always hurting them well i think you get the point im trying to make… its just not right!!!
sorry correction *normal* for them (the cats) to have!!
AGREED completely its a cat thats what it does protects itself when it feels endangered…. kinda like an example of: men think with their ‘other’ head if he puts it places that the wife or gfriend doesnt want or like she gets to have it cut off?? cause thats what he does?? well larena bobbit did it i guess its ok lol… im on the side that its inhumane and you are right about the knuckles its so they cant grow back…. dont screw with the cat to get them upset like this dumb a$$ and you wont get its claws in your lip
Never cuddle with your cat after eating tuna fish.
Never cuddle after eating tuna fish.
Never eat tuna fish.
I would think you’d make a fantastic seared tuna steak with your foom.
Never cuddle with a tuna.
Never fish with a cat?
Recommended and capable of producing hours of fun!!
Never hook a gift tuna in the mouth?
“It’s not a tuna!”
Not even a salmon of doubt.
Oh dear, did I get something bass ackwards?
I thought I smelt something fishy.
*wishes his comment would swim upstream*
Did you catch a whiff, Dragon?
His lips had been sealed.
Quick! Someone call a sturgeon!
Enter Hamlet Fish.
A man may fish with the worm that hath eat of a king, and cat of the fish that hath fed of that worm.
TTFN and Squeezes!
Here is a purr of fortune’s, sir, or of fortune’s
cat,—but not a musk-cat,—that has fallen into the
unclean fishpond of her displeasure, and, as he
says, is muddied withal.
(I always *SNORK!!* immoderately at “the unclean fishpond of her displeasure!)
“I am a man whom fortune hath cruelly scratched.”
Those of us with fisher kitties can’t help but *snork!* along with you.
You can tune a piano but you cannot tune a fish.
Well of course not, Guiros are percussive instruments!
*cue face-palm*
Hermy the cat always wanted to be a dentist.
He’s not just a misfit. Why can’t he fit in?
He tries to claw his way in.
He has a nose for sharp objects.
And boogers.
Is something wrong with your nose? I mean, you talk kind of funny.
I fink that is gonna leave a mark….wait a hole.
He ~did~ ask for a lip piercing for Christmas. Now he got it for free!
Little old for a lip piercing eh?.LOL
The cat thought he would look better with it.
cats are cuddly…hes just doing it wrong
Hey!
I just had an idea. (You don’t have to participate)
I just wanted to vote to see which guy and which girl are the most popular on here.
Rules:
1. Must answer in this thread of comments
2. Must Vote for both guy and girl.
Example: (Which are my actual votes, btw)
guy: Mrgreenguy
girl: Littlegirlblue
Please Vote! Thanks!
(PS my g key is broken and I have to copy and paste lowercase gs. That’s why some of the Usernames are wrong
)
The winners should write Mr. or Mrs. Failblog in their Username. (You don’t have to)
guy: Brewski (a tear in my beer. i miss you so much it hurts!)
girl: Judy (buddaskaweeezies!)
zombies: ZA (anklesqueezies)
moomins: The Moomin
Germans: AE <3 <3 <3
my favorite perv: Granny FTW!!!
Really I think my list of favorite people on here is very very long and I'd leave someone out if I tried. Sure, you only asked for guy and girl. But I'm having a very non-compliant personality day. And, don't forget the sex appeal of a good pink sparkly bat or a nice shellacked mackerel! I think the winner should accessorize. Can we make them wear a sash and tiara or carry a sceptre?
oops I accidentied the butter. but who here doesn’t have butter all over them? i was blue for a long time so hopefully i’ll be forgiven for my brainspasmic mistake.
It’s what happens when you spend to much time
cybering strangerstalkin’ to the FailPeeps.Sure
They can pick their poison.
guy: ZA or The general bondfan…. and the 5 Eagles guy.
girl: Triple “b” or Gracie and the Nightshayde.
Honour position: Granny
Sorry but can you just pick one of each. It would make it easier. Sorry.
Okay, allow me to play your game:
Best ass-spanker: granny.
Best sparkly bat swinger: gracie.
Best icon: kafleen
Best consistent humor: K@
That’s what I was trying to say could put it in a form just right.
Best Guy: BondFan, despite his endless list of Farmville “achievements” spamming up my FB2 news feed
Best Girl: Avis
Most Likely to Nom our brainz one day: ZA
Best Food-Based FailPeep: Jam
Most likely to crash into a PortaLoo : Gracie
Everyone’s Favourite Mythical Being/English Professor Combo :
…
… Nope, can’t think of anyone. :p *squeezesandfleezeswithaquickness*
I cannot support gender discrimination by separating the guys from the girls to vote on them as if they cannot compete in the same contest. But your rules say we must vote for one of each, so…
girl: Loz
guy: Loz
Best guy: Jon;
Best girl: LGB
Best dragon: DragonWriter (obviously!)
Best bird: Avis
Best unpoisonous fish: Fluffy
Best poisonous fish: ReallyEpicBlowfish
Best rodent: Mouse
Best undead: ZA
*hands out awards to all stated abve, plussy many that could’t fit into our ten second time space*
*end show*
*cue rainbow screen thingy*
Really? I never thought I was really noticed much around here. *MintyGreenSqueezes*
But you were the first guy that came to mind!
(And I notice all FailPeeps, whether they like it or not.)
Everyone assumes I’m Poisonous.
Well, they are right.
I am honored, MGG!
*bows to invisible audience*
Thank you! Thank you!
best rodent: mouse!!! (he must becareful he wouldnt want the cat to seal his fate and pierce his lip now would we?
I would like to do the Right Thing™ and vote for myself. Both times.
I’d like to vote for the least popular… can I vote for myself?
I like you sauerkrat ,you and I used to have good debates about subjects.
*GASP*
THANKIE!
*gives favorite blowfish a cookie that does not get soggy when under water*
*Eats cookie*
*Actidentally pokes with spikes*
Uh-oh! Now you only have 24 hours to live. What are you going to do, MGG?
May I suggest Disney Land?
Universal?
Skydiving?
I love it how cats are never aware of the fact that their nails are stuck in your skin.
I think they’re aware of it, which is why they try to pull them out, rather than retract them.
This fish knows her cats.
Once, a cat had Fluffy in her mouth. Before the cat could swallow the owner hit the cat with a rolled up newspaper. Fluffy doesn’t like to talk about it.
My mom’s cats never trust me. BOTH of them claw the crap out of me every time I try to put them in their favorite place, the third shelf in the linen closet. They beg and yowl to be put there (they are old and fat and can’t reach it without assistance) but they always claw my wrists and arms when I do. I literally have scars from them.
My cats <3 me.
Seriously, whenever either of them want something, they'll come and pester me until I give it to them.
Oh these cats love me, much as they’d loathe to admit it. They just seem to think I’ll drop them, something I have never done.
They also don’t care for stangers, as I learned while holding one of them when I answered the door. I have scars near my EAR!
Ouchies.
My cat (one is technically my sister’s, though she prefers me as I don’t abuse her) has an irrational fear of my Grandfather. I tried to help him “overcome his fear”, and he very nearly severed a major artery in my wrist.
*may have found a new moderated word*
And I know exactly which one it would be, too.
Ooh, really?
*trawls through dicitionary*
…Aardvark…
…Antenna…
…Zombie…
…
…
Well, that’s a pretty crap dictionary.
This stranger fearing cat climbed over the top of my head in her haste to flee the guest. Now? Whenever he comes over (he’s one of the maintenance guys in the building) she comes running up to him for attention.
The little $lut.
This should tell you what the word was.
usually cats dont like birds…
Hmmm.
Might want to see a Dentist,Buddy!!
Here,let me floss for you….
OUTCH! O_O;;
That would be Ouch, I assume.
Least he knows what it’s like for a fish to get caught on a hook
He’s hooked on a feeeeeling…
high on belieeeeving…
that the cat’s in love with theeee. …
since i have a cat i´m glad not to be a mouse
I resemble that remark!
EEEEEEK!! Someone resembling a mouse!!!
EEEEEEEEEK!!!
*runs blindly*
*clock strikes Juan*
“Mouse, run down!”
~Hickory D. Dock
*runs down*
*winds back up*
Uh… the only failure here is in the terrible Photoshopping job…
I know, huh? It’s almost as if they didn’t even touch the photo. You might as well not even call it a photoshop, it’s that bad!
I rescued you from the flood and this is how you repay me?
Well, look what the cat draged in.
*Hands Marius a G*
At least you weren’t using “drug.” Last time I did that, I saw some pretty interesting stuff and woke up on top of a trampoline wearing a banana suit and covered in peanut butter.
Did you dream that you were being pushed in a bucket by an Indian man and a goose along a muddy, flood-swollen river?
…where you see yourself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you?
..or were you standing high upon a mountain top, naked to the world
in front of every kind of girl?
And I thought I had strange dreams!
I wanna party with all of you!!!
(P.S. – Admiral, you spilled the wine.)
Psst! The movie was AWESOME!!! We went to see “Shutter Island”. I highly recommend it!!!!
OK, the movie was awesome, but how was the date?
Very nice! Things are going well!
That’s great, sweetie!
*squeeze*
*squeeze*
Thanks! It’s been a great couple of weeks.
*takes that pearl*
This doesn’t mean War…I would have given it to you.
Must be a saber-tooth cat.
That’s what you get for attempting cat yodeling. (If you dont get the joke search engineer’s guide to cats)
my boyfriend jUst got me ring with 24 CARROR GOLD I WISH HE WOULVE GOT ME A 34 CARROT GOLD BUT STAY OFF HIM IL BITE YOU
But is it real 24 CARROR GOLD?
SHEL BITE YOU.
Well, she WOULVE, but she’s noy single.
I’m kinda curious though, is 34 carrot gold bright orange? ‘Cause I might be interested in that…
Heehee, I’d forgotten about your love of all things Orange.
It may be, or it may just be the fabrication of a poor troll’s lonely brain cell.
Not all things orange. Just MOST things!
I too have a recently found fondness for Orange.
(Though I can’t stand the fruit, for some reason)
The fruit’s okay, I don’t really like carrots or sweet potatoes though. But I LOVE Cheeze Puffs!
Carrots, I like, but Sweet Potato… bleh.
But it’s the colour orange, particularly in design, that I’ve really fallen in love with.
Hee! Me too! Particularly in regards to high-end french cookware!
ht tp://cameraphotodigital.com/wp-
content/uploads/2009/10/mobalpa-orange-kitchen-
design.jpeg
I’d cut off my left arm for a kitchen like that.
Care to know just how much of a design geek I am? Those drinking glasses on the counter? They are called “Swing” glasses, and come in a variety of colors. And yes, I like the orange ones the best.
Check out “Big Chill” refrigerators, they come in orange too!
My gosh, thank you for that.
Not at all!!
I desperately want one of them myself!
That and an Aga stove. Go ahead. Look it up. Tell me you don’t want one too!
WHAT UP HE JUST CHANGED THE RING TO 34 CARROT GOLD I KNOW HES FAST STAY OFF
HIM ILL BIT U
You live less than three minutes from a Jewellery shop?
Good. That means you can’t be more than 10 from a Hospital or NeuroSurgery Clinic. Go there now, and tell them that you think gold is made of Carrots, (up to a maximum of 34 of them!).
They give you this neat jacket that lets you hug yourself, and some squishy walls!
I’m on your boyfriend, you dirty mouse-biter.
He told me that he has a special secret to share with you. It’s a surprise that he has rigged to your keyboard. You have to press the key that is located to the left of the A key. If you press it once, you will get your surprise from him, but if you press it more than once he will leave you forever and no matter how many people you bite he won’t come back.
*snoffles uncontrollably*
*joins in the snoffles*
It’s the “dirty mouse-biter” that gets me.
It’s the allusion to the caps lock key that got me!
Is noy!
Is yoo!
Noy me?
Ot, vet!
Tikes! Yhis is confusing.
Thy are wa yalking pike yhis.
balls!
My girlfriend have a perced vagina lips too !
Hopefully not through a similar mishap.
When i said i want cheezburger, i meanz it!
Like they always say “Always keep a stiff upper lip”
You let go first
Revolting-against-BS-cuddly-photo-ops-during-nap-time WIN!
I have to say, that cat claw lip piercing of yours is really not becoming.
what’s fail about that?
The Scritchy Scratchy Cat, I’d call it.
Definitely Cat!Win
i……goch…..yo…..FACE *claws face*
This is what happens to people who don’t know how to handle cats…
another reason cats suck
Glad to be back!
“Why won’t you love me back!”
Modern day romance..
Cat:Bitch I told you to brush yo teeth.
auuuuuuuch (:
that’s got to hurt..