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OMNOMNOMNOM
A bit harder, and he would have broken his neck. That would have been a nomnomnominashun for the Darwin awards. ^^
True that. I’d give a Darwin award for his brain. It’s dead anyway.
*Quick, i could be the first to comment, what can i say?*
…
*damn i wish i had a brain to think of something right now*
…
*i know, ill just say random gibberish before i waste any more time trying to think*
“OMNOMNOMNOM”
*damn im cool, im definitely not a douchebag!*
srsly dude are you that dense … it means he was eating the table … you douchebag
Table or not table … THAT is the question…
But can you furnish an answer?
Yes, but I may not couch it very delicately…
Did the table died?
♬ Keila is it too late to say shut up
Keila I’m too disgusted to accept this meme ♬
In that case, better run it by the bureau chief first.
I’d like to table a motion…
You have the floor.
I’d like to address the chair, if I may.
A back bencher such as yourself?
…
Very well…
Mr. Speaker, I’d like to furnish an objection.
I see nothing very objectionable sofa.
Depending on your performance, we might consider placing you in the cabinet.
That’s a curious choice.
He wants to be consoled.
Has anyone consulted Lord Chesterfield about this?
Pffft. Lord Chesterfield’s family lost all of its street credenza during the Ottoman Empire.
He’s still a member of the cabinet.
But he doesn’t have a leg to stand on.
Which is why chairturday is sitting in his place.
Try to cushion the blow.
He’s the student body present dent.
Is it a sort of 360° backwards-rotation kind of motion, resulting in pain?
That is going to leave a mark….on the table.
Not Aja – we have idiots for that.
*snorkity*
Epic *headdesk*
♬ It goes
Oooh la la
I see stars
I’m seeing stars
I see stars
I’m seeing stars… ♬
“Pplpllllease Raoul. I can give you stars. Just drop the refrigerator on my head one more time.”
*windmills circle around head*
“All my thoughts are in Dutch…”
OHMYGOSHOHMYGOSH! IT’S DRAGON!
*takes picture for evidence*
Only in Soviet Russia do you have pics(/videos) of Dragon.
Everywhere else, she’s the one with the extensive collection.
What are you trolling at?
I was asking in the last fail where dragon was, and it seems that she has arrived.
*chops away “dragon” with lucky ax and replaces it with “Dragon”*
I rarely ever make it to the morning fails.
Nice to know I was missed, though!
Yes. You were missed. I almost cried.
*sniff*
Who was that handsome young lady I squeezed this morning then?
Hee! For me, that was a late, late, late night fail!
*squeezy*
You ‘merkins surely have weird times to be awake or in bed!
‘Merkin? Is that anything like a gherkin?
*munches*
Um…no. No, it’s really not.
Though I suppose some people would still like to munch one.
Same thing, really. Only with more USA and less gherkin.
*snork*
Don’t contradict me before I say something!
Well, that’s a surprise.
If you think corn-on-the-cob floss is annoying, this is not for you.
*The Twilight Zone music plays*
Oooh! Music!
*grabs a partner, dances the Funky Serling*
Oh, dancing!
*grabs a Rod*
I didn’t know Rod Serling was a Pole!
That’s going to leave a failing mark.
At last I understand what is meant by “numbskull”!
His teacher wants to talk to him about his falling grades.
She wants him to get ahead.
Well, that lesson certainly had an impact.
“No, no! I said ‘Apply yourself *in* the classroom.’ IN. Not *on*.”
This must be the school of hard knocks.
Makes my head hurt… what the hell was that guy thinking??
“This will surely be one of the best stunts I’ll ever pull off!”
“Hold my beer and watch this!”
Famous last words.
Along with “What does this button do” and “This is going on YouTube!”
Last thing a redneck hears before he dies.
“Dude, this is going to be like so epic! Make sure you film it all!”
Head or tales?
A video ad, for TV service, that I CAN’T STOP, and seems to last longer than the actual video I just watched? FAIL.
If you can’t stop it, that’s your problem.
Now, now. Perhaps he is using a Toyota browser.
*topicalsnork*
The chap in the fail might just have been relying on Honda airbags.
My Toyota keyboard seems to be working up a biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
*watches as The Right Hono(u)able General BondFan518 MP – fearlessly holding onto his Toyota keyboard – veer to the left and off of the cliff*
Oops!
*picks up 4*
Hey, BF – you forgot this!!!
*tosses 4 off cliff*
Thank yoooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuu…
*disappears from sight*
*explodes in huge fireball*
I’ve been meaning to ask for awhile now… Is there a chance you would join us on Facebook? You can stay anonymous there (so did I).
Hmmmm…I’ll get back to you on that one. But, I may, if I can stay as “General BFF”.
Yes, you can. Hmm. That could make a nice slogan…
You mean….your real name isn’t Arthur Eld?!?!?!?
Errr… doch! And I’m a dead black boxer. Don’t worry.
bahaha! What a tool! Should have seen that coming a mile off!
Visibility was as poor that day.
Judgment too.
Now his memory is a bit foggy.
In fact, the whole thing is something of a blur…
Just as I thought. Another tragic example of student hazing gone awry.
Film at elebenty.
*tries to clean film off of window*
He saw it coming all right, but he forged a-head nonethless…
My parents always warned me against associating with headbangers.
I know it’s hard to see, but he blows a line of coke off of the table after the flip making it the most impressive stunt evarr!
Ninja flip?
Drug reference win?
I think he might have broken his face.
I would think something in his head was already broken before he did that.
It was powered by an unkown troll. Hell must be freezing over… again.
Dunno about Hell, but France was.
Met a Pirate called Jesus at Disneyland, though.
Then the world really is ending…
*sigh*
The world isn’t ending. It was here long before us and will survive us just like it survived the dinosaurs.
People are screwed though.
Now now, not every unknown commenter is a troll.
(Not even an “unkown” one?)
Unkoan, the KobayashI Maru solution applied to Zen Buddhism riddles.
*reprograms the one hand so it doesn’t clap*
Hey! How come my The Clapper™ won’t work?
It broke when it was left in the woods and a tree fell on it that didn’t make a sound.
The silence of the Tunguska event.
Sorry, that was me after I ate too many beans.
*applauds the Epic Fart*
I think you need a stronger word than Epic for that one.
Stalin doesn’t do things half-heartedly. Mass murder or farting.
Well, what can I say? I like to get the job done. Whether it’s pressuring most of Eastern Europe into communism or eliminating my political enemies one by one, it’s done smoothly and efficiently.
But it’s name is “duck”. It’s not even uppercase.
*steals MGG’s first apostrophe before Dragon or NS notice*
Better.
Thanks. That could have ended badly.
It did.
I saw it.
I died.
Did I miss something here?
Is having a name in all lowercase a bad thing? Am I a troll now?
*pouts*
No only is your name in lowercase it is also photoshopped! What do you have to say for yourself?
Pssst…Leila…someone photoshopped out your “t”!!
Do you know who did it?
I still can’t figure out if you are my little or big sister. Either way this online sibling rivalry is pretty funny.
…and don’t ever do that again or I will pull your hair.
Well, if we go by age, you’re my big sister. Also, I’m the youngest in my family, so I’ve got “little sister” mentality down to a fine science.
She’s got Arthur’s affliction.
It’s contagious!
*puts on hazmat suit*
Pinstripe, very nice DW.
*checks shot records*
Good! I’ve already been vaccinated against Arthur’s Affliction.
*hangs head*
I’m sorry….?
It’s just *sob* all the name I have *cry*
*pat*
*pat*
It’s okay. I mean, look at my name. I should be the last to complain about others. Mine is all wonky.
At least you’re no longer capitalizing your whole name!
How the hell do you remember that? You scare me.
YOU MEAN LIKE THIS?!
Needs more exclamation marks to represent the old Leila…
(Says the guy who used to be a “First!” troll! :p )
Oops.
*gently scootches Arthur out of the way so he doesn’t get in the way of her previous comment*
ME?!
*pauses to think about devious past*
It’s okay. We managed to cure you!
*dries eyes*
Thanks. I feel better now.
One day, when I’m all grown up, I might have a wonky name as well
*offers margarita*
Margarita? On a Monday? I can’t. I am working.
*grabs drink and drinks it really fast*
I don’t want to get in trouble. They have random alochol and drug testing here.
See what you did? I can’t spell alkohol anymore.
*shakes fist at mondays*
Where I work many people would get fired if we had alcohol testing. Don’t test don’t tell I say
Somebody gots ‘Ritas?!?!
This was every bit as predictable as car bowling.
He’s bleeding!
That’s the funny bit
Someone attempts something that will surely fail and guess what, it DOES fail. That is HIIIIIIILAAAAAAARIIIOOUUS, folks, isn’t it?
Ah ond es hi daed?
We can like totally tell this dude is brilliant by the way he hops up on top of a small but average height table. He takes a moment to consider how amazing this will look, swings his arms and does a back flip off the table. Problem is he forgets to land with his feet on the floor and instead lands with his face on the table. Though he wasn’t bright enough to consider this outcome at the beginning, he was bright enough to grab the part of his body that hurt the most afterward.
Cue bicycle dude, lightning and the beloved DOT ORG!
That wasn’t a table, it was a small overpass.
Woooooooooooooooohooooooooooooo!
Don’t forget the powered by. Duck says, “I could watch that again.”
Thank goodness he didn’t shout, “Aflac!”
ZA, your descriptions are always right on the mark! Take a bow!
And in High Density so we can see all the details
You want ZA to take a bow????
Really?
*looks for Judy*
For once, I would like to see a girl who does a back flip that ends badly. Just once. *sigh*
You mean like crashing into a TV at the end?
failblog.org/2010/01/14/backflip-fail-2/
DAMMIT!! I went looking for that, and you beat me to it.
*pouts*
Sowwy. *squeeze*
Nah. Not like that. She had the help of a springy bed. Let’s be honest all of us girls love to jump up and down on beds anyway. I want a fail like the one above where his intent was to do a back flip from the table.
Picky, picky, picky.
*sigh*
I am planning on making that my middle name since I wasn’t given one.
*puts on her thinker-upper*
*thinks a thinky thing*
How about “Sweetie,” instead?
I can think of many ladies here who are more deserving of that.
Afro Ninja strikes again!
Oh my God, your video is forcing me to watch a commercial for DishTV? What the hell is wrong with you?
I can only say the video was very kind to me. Everything happened consensual.
How long does it take you to reload (the page)?
Serious question? Another young pun-run I’m about to destroy? *shrugs* About two seconds.
Nope. Reloading the page stops the commercial.
Ah, he was talking about a commercial? I heard about them. Must be annoying…
*pats Adblock*
I think it’s a US thing. I’m not getting any annoying adverts. Apart from those on TV.
My Adblock-free work computer also shows tons of banners and animations on FB.
*never sees the commercials*
*feels a little ashamed how how smug she feels about that*
You speak native?
I use Adblock, and I never used to see them, but at the end of this video a commercial started to play, so I reloaded.
Strange. Just re-watched – no ad.
Very rarely…but sometimes the accent slips in there.
Did the video buy you dinner first?
Did it hold your hair back?
*snork*
There is no hair on my body that is long enough to hold it back.
Ladies, it’s confirmed! Arthur manscapes.
I KNEW IT!!
Not my knuckles, though.
*holds back Arthur’s knuckle hair*
*gigglesnork*
*story fills the headlines*
SHOCK HORROR! ARTHUR ELD MANSCAPES!!! MORE ON PAGES 2,3,4 and 5!!!
Woohooo! I’m the page three girl! YAY!
How long you got?
Protection! Just make sure it used protection, we don’t want other little forceful ads running about.
Yeah right, you were asking for it by not wearing anything over your eyes. You wanted it, you liked it and you know it!
Looks like he’s got “FAIL” stamped on his forehead.
I’m always amazed that people don’t stop and think for a second. Take this guy: Right before he jumped he should have known that this is the perfect setup for a Youtube/Failblog video. Idiot (himself) trying stupid stuff while people film it. I mean – has he NEVER seen one of the elebenty trillion Youtube videos that had pretty much the same setup? But still he jumps…
Fail Blog was created for people who do consider these things to laugh at people who don’t.
*golf craps*
8o
Well that didn’t work. Lets see… :0?
No.
:O? 0_0?
I give up…
8)
clickie
BTW, BFF, I shed some
on your 
at
ht tp://failblog.org/2010/02/13/macho-fail/#comment-790318
Fact – Every single person who has ever tried to do a blackflip on camera while not part of a larger performance deserves to be severely injured.
Also see – People showing off kung fu moves. People lifting weights. Teenage girls doing sexy dancing without getting naked.
Why don’t you take a seat right over there.
Heath bleeding!
Been looking for this video for a while
Good old kelston idiots hahaha
ah its kelston, uniform looks like waitakere, but i forgot that kelstons uniform is simmular
So are you sure its Kelston Boys High?
That was what I thought too.
xD
LOL This looks like the school that i went to…. Waitakere college in Auckland, New Zealand, Similar uni accents and the type of idiots we had at that school
Totally glad that some other ppl on here recognise the Kiwi accent!!
I miss NZ!!!
Ha wow, I think I went to that school! Is that ROI?
Yes! New Zealanders rule
haha, what a retard, I love it!
Did he died?
i bet they are kiwis! giving us a good reputation i see.
WHAT?!!? No Slow-Mo? You failblog cats are getting lazy…
Damn friction will kill us all.
no slow motion?
awwwwh…
He’s bleeding az, bro!
BAHAHAHAHA! “he is bleeding” said in a hispanic accent , very entertaining
accent recognition fail It’s New Zealand dude.
dude thats a mouri accent its from a new zealand highschool called Kelston this is about 2 years old!
Bunga!
he drunk the table
*High Pitched Voice* He’s bleeding!
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
Guess he didn’t make the Fame auditons.
gotta love seeing a maori getting his face bashed in !!! Legendary
da ambalamps
Call DEM
haha shot kelston… i was there when that happend…so epic
haha KELSTON !
haha that was around 2007 ? hahaha !
yes he’s from New Zealand. and he’s Maori !
it’s not a fail..it’s a table win!
that most i have hert alot . he must up big time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Everybody knows Kiwis cant fly
Human fail? Or table win? The world may never know!…
Unbelievable!! He still survived!!