Fire Danger Fail
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FIRE!! Someone press 3333 on the TV control.
*fires cannon*
I’m sorry, what?
*runs through the room with torches ablaze*
SAFETY THIRD!! ……..mind that puddle of petrol…..
And those bottles of kerosene…
And those barrells of gun powder…
….oh and don’t go near the room of liquid Oxygen, that is just asking for trouble.
Does this look like a handgranade to you?
no just a pineapple.
But I wouldn’t eat it, it looks a bit green.
Looks more like a stick of TNT to me.
*shrugs shoulders*
*squeeze!*
Or those precariously placed vials of nitroglycerin…
The Semtex is fine though.
*makes little men out of C4*
*sprays little men with acetone*
*makes a log cabin for them out of TNT*
*supplies k@ the proper wires, switches and digital clock*
Here, you can use these for decoration.
*hands over a few pounds of nails*
It’s sooooo beautiful!
*carefully uses remote to extinguish torches*
Huh, who knew plastic melts when you use it to squish fires??
Does everyone feel like MacGyver now?
If Mcguyver feels like plastic explosives….then yes!
I would love to feel MacGyver!
*click*
OMG!! Thank you for saving me. Thank you! Thank you!!!!!
*jumps on k@*
*smooch!!!!*
*smooch!!!!*
*smooch!!!!*
*smooch!!!!*
*squeeze*
*slowly suffocates*
Are you sure you don’t want to call the fire service….just to be on the safe side, you understand!
Aren’t you from the fire service?
Erm……a bit….
*flees*
I. Feel. So. Violated.
*sob*
Well there is a remote chance of danger of course.
ONly narrowly avoided… because of the Control of the firefighters
Careful not to push any buttons. Some things are hot topics around k@.
I have one in my trousers, firemen pushing the button usually aggravates it though
Aggravates or elates it?
*watches receding “tail” lights*
Who is that naked Fireman?
*on 3 Press*
I LIKE TURTLES!
A very common preference.
♪ Fire fire
Fire fire
Fire fire fire fire
Can’t put it out with water
Keeps on burning
Keeps on burning
Keeps on burning burning burning
In my soul ♫
♪ I have only one burning desire,
Let me stand next to your fire. ♪
♪I fell into a burning ring of fire.♫
Is that song about haemorrhoids? Hmmm… “fell” – guess not…
OMG now my computer’s on fire! I think my firewall’s broken!
*turns computer off then dumps a full pot of coffee on person’s computer for good measure*
You are welcome!!
That’s a waste of perfectly good coffee!
Ooopsy!! I will go make more.
*goes to brew another pot of coffee*
*holds out mug*
*pours coffee in GS’s mug*
Cream and sugar are right over there. By the remote control.
Thanks! I can’t seem to get going this morning.
*squeeze*
Ahem!!
*looks at conspicuously empty coffee cup*
Oh. Mah bad!
*pours and refills carib’s cup with some coffee*
Thankoo
*puts cup of steaming hot coffee in lap and drives off*
Brew
Why didn’t she just use the fire-extinguisher? That would ruin the TV.. But it was already on fire, so…
This reminds me of when a telephone would ring on TV, my dad would tell someone to answer the phone. Everyone else could easily tell the phone was on the TV but he was fooled almost every time.
Of course, with today’s TVs the sound is much better and it might be hard to tell, especially with the stereo audio systems that make the sound seem to come from somewhere else, but back then (30 years ago) you’d have to be practically deaf to be fooled.
The fire is obviously photoshopped. How could she not notice the pixels?
And the shadows were all wrong. Elebenty.
Those logs are fake!
I saw this on TV long before it ever got onto Failblog. Fail.
That fire was on purpose. It’s not a fail, it’s a win.
I drive by this fire everyday!! It’s hilarious.
I can’t believe you’re laughing at that poor old lady. She really believed her TV was on fire. Have you no hearts you evil SOB’s?
First.
You’re so weak.
me > u
*rants*PETA!*rants*
Right that’s it! I’m going to take control of your pc and erase your hard disk.
It would take a PhD in imägenary languages and other national security related skills to do that…
I do have a PhD. I could tell you what it’s about but I’d have to kill you.
Oooooh tellmetellmetellme!
Stuppid Americans.
When Obama stays in power for much longer we all won’t have any other fires than those on TV.
You get fire on TV if you have cable.
Why don’t you people comment on the fail, and stop all this roleplay hornychat!
Did he die?
Wyh r u sutch a buntch ov idierts?
This is NOT funny. Someone was hurt in this particular fire. Nice going FailBlog. FAIL!!!
You morans have NO idea about anything! It’s a common tradition in Germany to call the firemen to turn off your TV. Everybody does it, just ’cause you stupid and fat Americans don’t know anything about the world around you doesn’t make this a fail!
Last!!!1!
This is from my country. Loosely translated in English, it says that firemen extinguished fire with a TV remote control. LOL LOL LOOOOOOL LOL!!!!
Viva la [insert country]!!!
Not anymore, stoopid.
u all need to get lives.
u fail @ at life
Grammer iz not that impotent. Why do u alwayz correct peoples spelling hear?
None of you understand!
“Fire” means “By”, so all that’s happening here is what method to turn off the TV.
dis never happened u ppl belieev ne thing including puncuation
What’s with all the *squeezing* going on? You people make me sick!
Quoi?
J’ai retourné a l’Angleterre apres avoir étre en France pour quatre jours, et tout le monde sont Trolleuse!
this isnt a fail its a win!
You’re wrong! There is only one correct translation to that. There is no funny interpretation…unless you count misinterpretation, which I don’t count…because…well…because that would make you right!
*wraps potato in foil*
*tries to place in fire box*
*gets frustrated*
If your box is on fire, you should give Czuhc a call.
Isn’t that granny’s job?
Granny just makes the fire spread.
….using the flammable snail trail.
I hope Czuhc isn’t too busy today… Train crash near Brussels.
Oh yes, I heard about that on the radio today.
Uh oh, hope he is OK.
oh i rember as i was in germany i run ed every night
erictile dysfunction?
equality dominatrix?
everything’s ducky?
Exceedingly dumb?
Erm… dunno.
Elementary, darlin’!
Equal dominance?
Equine dancing?
Evil Dentures?
Electric Dingleberries?
Elvish Doohickey?
How did you “run” ED?
It’s an executable now. You press ‘run’, click on the program, then voila! ED central.
ed is horse herman the german ride it
Yule log yourself when you realise you’ve been charged with making hoax calls.
Are you really sure you want to know that?
Curses, I forgot to press the ‘Reply’ button, so I probably killed all the fail… On to the next picture!
Seems you forgot to press it twice in a row.
That’s one powerful ‘clickie’.
*anti Vday*
*squeeze Shadow*
I went to work to avoid it!
*squeezies*
Did it work?
Yup
The whole day…..not a word on it!
Just several people complaining about clinical negligence cases!
*Serene look passes over face*
Lucky you! My hubby and I do not care for it but my step-daughter was complaining that her boyfriend didn’t get her anything. BAH!!!
Did she cry…..(sorry had to *slaps own hand*)
rofl!!!
She pouted all day.
Awwwwww, poor thing!
Nothing good comes of this day. You get your feelings hurt for not getting anything and your mate is in the dog house.
Say, where is my cut on those t-shirts?
*hands over 90000 internets*
*squeeeeeeze*
(And for the record, Leila, now that I am a position to FINALLY answer your question from almost a week ago… I am a guy.
)
IN a position… IN a position… *headdesk*
GIRL… GIRL… *headdesk*
*roffles*
[smartass]Actually, a strong source of light will reveal dong or funbags, even in a shadow.[/smartass]
*ShadowyArthurSqueeze*
Oooooooooooooooh…a failPeep sandwhich!
Hehehe! *squuueeeeeeeezes all*
Ooh! Reason #1 why I love my youth group:
They actually have Cuddle Puddles. No, really. There was one every night before we went to bed when I was at our group retreat. :mrgreen!
Reason #2:
On the second day I was there, while people were waiting in line for lunch, everybody spontaneously piled into a group hug and started singing, “All You Need Is Love.”
Whoopsie.
Your a christian shadow?
It’s better than his B Muslim Shadow.
I don’t want any. It seems to be lacking mayo.
*smears MGG with lot-o-mayo*
How about now?
Much better. but i would prefer it be on the sandwhich next time.
*begins to eat mayo off self*
*click!*
Was that mayo from a bottle or a tube? Or maybe a jar?
PAPARAZZI! DIE!
*throws mayo at Shadow*
carib: yes. Yes it was.
O my gosh!
*searches self for male genitilia*
*finds only the one in his pants*
*is releived*
Jar. Definitely a jar.
MGG, that better not have been Simon Mayo.
*squeeze*
I am still trying to figure out what got me so confused that day. I do feel badly about it.
You’ve been gone a while. Dont’ do that again.
I never liked Valentines day anyway. To much pink…
Oi….I like pink!
Pink is ok in hair, it’s just when it’s plastered on every single wall in every single hallway and in every single room. It gets kinda…scary.
Scary? More like headache and massive eye-bleeding. :c
Errrr…………….. you would so hate me!
*hides ironic pink fluffiness of abode behind back*
I myself enjoy hair styles and color that you wouldn’t usually see every day. But when pink is all that you can see, a line has deffinetly been crossed.
Luckily my husband just thinks it is hilarious! …….I am not the kind of girl who radiates pink fluffiness!
*PinkSqueezes k@andMGG*
I don’t care who Pink is squeezing, but I know who I’m gonna squeeze.
*squeezes Leila*
*looks hopefully at the doggy*
BWAHAHAHA!
*hugegroupfailpeepsqueezes*
ROFL!!
*squeezeGS*AE*
WHOOO!
*allaroundsqueezes*
*squeeeeezes everyone in thread*
*squeeeeezes once again for good measure*
*nowsqueakycleanfromtheshower squeezes*
What?
I had to get all that mayo off me.
*glares at MGG*
What?
*adds “did I do” to the post*
ht tp://failblog.org/2010/02/15/fire-danger-fail/#comment-791266
this.
*squeezesallfailpeeps*
I got a pink teddybear once, I liked it. But as time passed it grew on me and I started to hate pink more and more. One night I just had enough, so I sodomized it and then I ripped it’s head off and ate it with applesyrup… Or maybe that’s just how I remember it..
Where you, perchance, drunk?
Nah, I’m swedish.
So… yes, right?
Pretty much, yes.
I am the god of Hellfire and I bring you…
Is it pizza?
*crosses fingers*
Herrings?
A new remote control?
Fireman with long hoses?
You called?
How the heck did you do that Jam?
Let me have a go….
A Lottery win please….
…My Little Pony!
15% or more savings on auto insurance?
Panncakes with ketchup?
Note to self: don’t put the remote control on top of the tv in case of tv-fire
Note to carib: Never put the remote control on top of the TV, for whatever reasons.
Note to Carib: Always put remote in couch so that only you know where it is.
Duly noted.
*puts post-it on light bulb next to tv*
You should post this warning for all to see. It’s a safety standard that you just can’t keep to yourself.
Wow. Calling 911 for that?!?!
Did you read the fail? It says … oh, never mind.
Please, Leila. Refrain from feeding the troll.
*feeds troll dried Madrake root*
I’m sorry.
What?
You’re forgiven. just make suree you don’t do it again. (But if you do, make sure it includes some form of poison)
*adds ‘n’ to previous post*
It does now!
Thank you. you’ll be rewarded… sooner or later.
My actions are entirely altruistic on this, I need no reward!
You deserve a medal, doc.
118.
Would have been funny if she would have extinguished the fire herself by calling 911 on the tv remote…
…but we never would’ve heard of it.
Heard of what?
w ww.tellyouwhenyou’re18.com
Bu-but I am 18!
*shows fake ID made out of construction paper*
This says you’re 180…
…
Seems legit. Follow me.
WHOOO!
*hobbles through door on a cane*
No thank you. it takes away from the… “effects”.
Quad t’fúck?
*hits </b with a hammer*
WHAT? I CAN’T HEAR YOU! MY HEARING AID MUST BE BUSTED!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah!
Success!
*runs away and doesn’t pay*
“I thought they were sheep!
They were wolves, in sheep’s clothing.
I didn’t know that! New concept to me.” ~E. Izzard
*watches as Jon; runs*
*calls in tactical nuke*
*should be hitting Jon; right… about… NOW!*
That was a giraffe in Jon’s clothing.
Looked painful, though.
You shall die a long and painful death.
*smiles*
*fire begins to burn in eyes*
*remote has proven to be a turncoat and does not work*
ht tp://failblog.org/2010/02/12/news-fail-5/
lol. That TV station is RTL2. I know that fire.
but a long time ago not anymore! or?
I can’t help but to wonder… where are Dragon and Avis?
You are here a little earlier than usual, I very rarely see them when I am about…..heck this is the first time I have spoken to you!
Hold on, did I just see that?…..clicks on previous comment.
*roffles*
Don’t speak to him! He grows from your comments… No wait.. That sounds weird in so many ways… I like it!
Well, there’s no school today and I was REALLY bored, so I just got online and went, well, here actually.
You mean *sniff* you didn’t come here to get *squeezes* and meet-up with all your Fail Peeps *sniff* and engage in witty banter?!?!?
NO! Don’t take it that way! I loves getting squezzes and engaging in witty banter! Would your own personal squeeze make the sadness go away?
*opens arms wide*
~Wait. Lemme think about it.~
.
Yes. Absolutely.
*shuts eyes tight*
*throws arms wide*
*waits for squeeze*
Wait for it… Wait for it…
*SKAWEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE*
*gasp.gasp*
*pant.pant*
Thanks!
You’re welcome!
Ahhhh….Lucky!
Those guys usually get here a little later, most of the time I have left work by then!
(UK- past 5pm at the mo)
I can’t wait to be old, so I can have adventures everyday with everything
Was that supposed to sound dirty or are you talking about setting everything on fire? I know I would.
TV remotes that can distinguish fire? I think I’ll call MacGyver on that one.
wow, kinda lame.
Lame? You got away with ‘lame’?
……So did you.
Oh noes! Now I haz a confuzzle!
Really? Try this.
*hands LGB a bottle of Confuzzle-Be-Gone*
Thanks.
*swallows contents of bottle in one swig*
*hic*
…gnihtyna did ti kniht t’nod I
It’s working just fine. That’s one of the side effects.
Side effects? NOW you tell me!
!em llet uoy WON ?stceffe ediS
*erases first line*
?*enil tsrif sesare* naem uoy t’noD
.truh ot gnitrats era seye ym
!GGM uoy nmaD
?”*enil tsrif sesare*” naem uoy t’noD
.dohtem gnitseretni na s’taht dnA
…ti gnikniht tslihw ti epyt ot gniyrt naht reisae HCUM
.yek worra tfel eht sserp neht rettel a epyT
.gniod neeb ev’I tahw s’tahT
?ti t@nsi doog s@ti ,haeY
.liaf ehportsopA
.si ti seY .seY
.tihs hO
?ta gnirats enoyreve s’tahW
¿ǝuop noʎ ǝʌɐɥ ʇɐɥʍ
ı ɥɐʌǝu,ʇ pouǝ ɐuʎʇɥıub¡
Isn’t there a Unicode character to do the reversal?
They say replying to one’s own comments is the first sign of madness, but: the previous was a test, and for those who don’t want to laboriously type in reverse, simply place the Unicode character “” (without quotes) before what you want to appear in reverse. That is,
backwards = backwards
Trying again: the Unicode character is & # 8 2 3 8 ; (remove spaces)
Okay, let’s try this….
That’s twice now you’ve replied to yourself. Should we be worried?
.nuf adnik si siht .yeh
?nuF
~.golb siht no nuf evah reven eW~
The Imág is still moderated…
LAME!
Tbf, I thought my computer was on fire when I scrolled down to this fail.
“senlty”?
Huh! I think it says “senilty”, but I totally didn’t notice the misspelling before…
its funny because truth, my grandparent same, so crazy, they shave all face w/ razor and grandmother always complain about grandfather having affair and sex with others in the old people home, aah
We can put out the fire with the remote – Nein.
I love the last sentence of the article. “Ahh, senility, where everyday and everything is an adventure.”
I’d point out that “everyday” in this case is a fail, except that I think I’m the only person in the world who still cares about the difference between “everyday” and “every day”. >___>
You wouldn’t believe how often that happens over here.
This fail reminds me of that episode of The I.T. Crowd where they actually do have a fire but put a monitor in front of it, so when their boss sees it he just says, “Nice screensaver!” Sort of the reverse of this situation.
Ahhh, those Germans. Always three steps ahead of us Americans when it comes to fire safety.
Das ist sehr correct
that was easy..
Those firemen are amazing!!!! How the hell did they manage that!!! they turned a tv off with a tv remote!!!!!