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Diving Sign Fail
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Cheezburger Network Blog
Jury awards 0 points.
Ther is a knack to flying. You throw yourself at the Ocean and miss.
*jumps*
*triple somersaults*
*lands on a Whale*
…and that ladies & gents, is how you comply.
hey this is some funny shyte
And the gold medal in Olympic not diving goes to K@!
Much better than dealing with Valentines Day Crap
*stands on podium*
*eyes leak*
everytime i try to get on this site i get the explorer can’t connect window…am i the only one?
yes.
you use the explorer? fail!
Ultra mega fail.
Well you got on just now didn’t you? Use firefox though.
Google Chrome FTW!
Hitcherhiker’s Guide
“Hitcher”? Gladly! *smacks*
Awards gold star. (-1 for spelling)
or should that be -42 for spelling?
This is best accomplished by eing distarcted at the last minute by, for example, this sign.
That’s “being”, by the way.
oh, and “distracted”.
Way to succeed at spelling there
woot?
does it make a double crime if i do land in water?
and triple if you ate recently oooh living on the edge
Quadrupled double points if you poooh’ed after eating.
Aim for the rocks, and you’ll be ok.
crack can make you fly
Things fly from cracks.
so u need to land on the rocks, that may hurt a bit…
*Tutorial to not land on the water*
1-expose you body to radiaction
2-check if you got super powers to fly
3-go a clif near the ocean
4-jump
5-stop before you touch the water and fly way
but if i slip and fell down, is it ok to land in water then?
No.You should really try to land on the rocks.
It’s so much better if you land on the scotch.
mmm…radiaction….sounds kinky
Now there’s some smart master of laws. “But, Sir, I didn’t dive into the ocean. I just jumped and landed in the water.” – “Well, there you go. Read the second rule.”
maybe they meant, that you wouldnt land in the water even if you tried, cause water there is just an optical illusion.
MY DICK IS HUUUUUUUUUUUUGE
no. Your mum is HUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE
Now I know what ‘whale’ K@ was talking about.
Just sad nature decided to attatch it to his head really!
*erases surplus ‘t’*
*bukkit
Just sad that nature decided to leave so much of the inside of his head empty.
Yeah, it stretches from A to Z on the keyboard, or if you see something you like, it might stretch from Q to E!
LMAO.
Where’s your child?
In the pool. He just finished. Which is why no one should jump into the water.
Sec. 2-5-49. – Diving/jumping.
No person shall dive or jump into any body of water in park, beach or any recreational area from any pier, bridge, rock or precipice other than at those places designated and posted for diving or jumping by the Director, as authorized by resolution of the Board of Supervisors. Violation of this section shall be an infraction.
(Ord. No. 99-21, § 2, 8-31-99)
Sec. 2-5-49.1. – Landing in water after having jumped or dived.
No person shall land in any body of water in any park, beach or recreational area after having jumped or dived from any pier, bridge, rock or precipice above such body of water, other than at those places designated and posted for diving and jumping by the Director, as authorized by resolution of the Board of Supervisors. Violation of this section shall be an infraction.
god bless america
god bless the fail
What is unclear is what the distinction is between jumping into the water and landing in the water after jumping.
apparently someone got away with jumping and subsequently landing in a body of water, without going “into” it.
I imagine the second is so that they can punish people who are, for example, jumping across boulders near shore and miss.
The floating poo from the flue nearby.
It’s most likely that someone got away with the excuse that they were “attempting to jump onto something in the water and missed” and then everyone started using the excuse so they made the subsection because it’s easy to create an ordinance but very difficult to repeal or change one.
Nice to know the bureaucrats are staying employed during the recession!
God, you’ve gotta love the Nanny State.
The funniest part is the fact that there are separate laws for the two (well, one is a sub-paragraph of the other).
we all float down here
In other words, bungee jumping is the only sort of jumping allowed around here! Either that, or hanging yourself.
Ok, this must be one of those Douglas Adams HHGTTL things. I’m guessing that the idea is for you to jump, see the sign, and be so shocked by the absurdity of it all that you forget to hit the water, and instead begin to fly.
Durrr, that should have been HHGTTG, (Hitch-Hiker’s Guide To The Galaxy).
…..damn traitorous keyboard….
Are you sure it wasn’t Lagaxy?
hhgtt “law”
though i guess the “the” is a bit superfluous
This sign was clearly intended for people with the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device.
Only the fully powered one, mind you…
The one that is worth more than all the combined salaries and organs of [subject hometown here]?
♪ I can walk on water, I can fly… ♫
That’s not water yer walking on. …
i wonder what will hapened after he land on water XD
But that’s the best part!
me tits fell in and pulled me with officer
No getting wet after landing in water.
…but fornication is allowed.
lotsa commotion out in the ocean.
Sadly, not a joke:
http://www.ocparks.com/uploadgraphics/Appendix%20I%20-%20County%20of%20Orange%20OC%20Parks%20Ordinances.pdf
See Section 2-5-49 and 2-5-49.1.
so you are supposed to levitate after jumping??
yes, but u could also fly
it says not to jump but then if u do jump dont touch the water?
i could think of a million ways to obey that sign while disobeying it at the same time
wait, no one else can levitate?!
Only Jesus can do this
Looks like Jesus will have lots of fun in the water
This sign might be in a designated rock climbing area where the only legal way to get down is to rappel onto a beach (but not into the adjacent body of water).
Note that another section prohibits rappelling off most structures. So, you can’t take your Batman grappling hook and affix it to the pier only to lower yourself down to the water below because that would be landing in the water on top of rappelling.
Seriously, I think the reason they wrote it like this was to cover all their bases.
And someone will walk around at least 2 of these signs, dive in, (too shallow to dive and jagged rocks just under the water) and get badly hurt (or killed) and the “victim” or “next of kin” will sue the parks department because the “victim” was not warned of the danger. It is happening here in Washington State.
I dunno who is worse, the Nanny State, or the sue-happy idiots…
sue happy idiots force the nanny state.
so it’s the idiots
I go to this beach all the time. Its in laguna beach
ok, so if I jump once, I am never allowed to land in water again!?
You just have to throw yourself at the ocean and miss.
There are such things as jetpacks.
*Jumps over ocean*
*Flies into the sunset.*
and how do you suppose we do that?
Technically you can “roll over the edge” and “fall inside a boat”.
The fail boat sinks and pulls you into the water, making you touch the water.
Did not mention anything about WALKING on water,if you can DO IT.
Aw, why can’t I go into the water?
*steps off edge, stops falling two feet above the water surface and sulks in midair*
You can defy the laws of gravity if you’re a tiger.
If you’re a cartoon character, you can run off the the edge (not jump or dive), and you will never fall into the water unless you look down. So just keep looking up!
I think the Law can now defy Reality
Elphaba can defy gravity. Just sayin’.
this is tablerock! everytime i’m there i want to take a photo and upload on here. thank you for doing the work for me!
The people at the skydiving school there are still trying to figure out what’s so funny about this!
that explains everithing..
WHAT WATER, WHAT ROCKS, WHAT SKY DIVING SCHOOL, AND WHY SHOULD WE GIVE A PLASTIC DOG POOP ABOUT K@… my dick feels like corn.
This is so the guvmint cna give you TWO tickets (and collect) TWO fines should you jump (and land) in the water.