Pool Fail
Pool temporarily closed for decontamination, Fornication occurred in the pool.
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That’s what I call a sticky situation.
That’s really rooted it then.
You bet…and they’ll be shagged by the time they clean it all up.
Zing!
Once at about 3 a.m. I looked out my bedroom window and saw a couple doing it in the spa, I should have grabbed my camcorder!
Shoulda run to your fridge and egged ‘em on.
WIN! lol
3dham i lold epicly coz as i read ur comment there was a hot tub ad on the side bit! lol
Well, f&$k!
But was it hairy?
I would never swim in that pool.
But would you fornicate in it?
What they don’t allow making forts out of blankets in the pool?
^Hell YA
feh
I’d try not to frighten the fish.
Go ahead and do it, just for the halibut.
Okay, then; I’ll mullet over.
Walleye agree with sauerkraut, I urge caution, lest you want to get cod.
Natch, yer just throwing out some bait.
Depends on what tuna was playing.
Holy mackerel, there’s a boy at the bottom of the pool!
While you’re motorboating
Maybe not, but he might pee in it.
Why not? Between chlorine and filters it’s not as if there’s a health risk. It’s also not as if both sets of genitals and much much worse isn’t in that pool all of the time. I have to wonder what’s wrong with their pool that fornication requires a hazmat team to resolve.
Butt sex?
Nope.
ib4 pools closed
pool’s never open
I don’t even know what fornicate means.
when ur mum … goes out
win
It’s when 2 people who aren’t married, such as a boyfriend and a girlfriend, get all giggity with eachother. Get it?
In closing, let me just say: Giggity giggity, giggity goo.
What is it called when the two people are married?
“Life after death is as improbable as sex after marriage.”
bwahahaahaaaa…
(getting dirty look from herself.)
Masturbation…hah. Now Im sad..
U are a funny man
This is kinda sweet.
For some unexlicable reason, your post, combined with you profile pic, causes a deep and uncontrollable spasm of great unease in me.
Are you the Anti-Christ / Un-Mohamed / Evil-Dali lama?
Cuz if you are… then know that we lol-site posters are ur greatest enemy. While u bring frowns, we bring lols.
Does that make us all Jesus?
No, it just makes you an idiot.
sorry, but im Pretty sure thats a win
I’d wager you’re assuming it was two humans.
Thank you for the rather disturbing mental image, you jackanapes.
Or at least one human and something else?
There are multiple reasons not to swim in that pool if at least one of those animals is a shark. Even if it just got some action it probably won’t be a great swim buddy.
TMI, dude.
Terrestrial Mating Institute. Of course you’d try to water this down.
ocean temporarily closed …. (..)
That might be permanent.
I’d like to see them try to decontaminate the ocean…
♫ The tide is high, but I’m holdin’ on ♫
Fake and Gay
You mean false and homosexual sir?
two camels in a tiny car!
your mom got squaids
I see RayWilliamJohnson has influenced this site somewhat.
What?
I’ll never look at public pools in the same way again
It’s bad to fornicate in the pool, but peeing is OK!?
Not while fornicating.
Directly after is recommended.
Directly before can be necessary.
HEY! No squeezing in the pool!
They did what in the pool?!?!?
Making babies.
And posting pics by mobile phone afterwards?
It’s also OK to have sex in the pool with your spouse apparently.
This. Sex is perhaps one of the cleanest things to occur in that pool. All those nasty people and their bodily fluids (sweat, snot, mucus, urine) that visit public pools…
OK I will NEVER go into a public pool again. Sex is one thing…all that other “stuff” I can’t handle! Not sure now if I could handle the thought of sex in a pool either. I think I am now on my way to becoming a germaphobe
Only if you are very very young and cute.
“Welcome to the OOL. We’ve left the P out of it. We hope you will too.”
“When urine the pool, you must keep an eye out.”
Remember “Caddyshack”? Nothing like that
Quick, someone get me a Baby Ruth…
no i do not. probably cuz i havent seen it
POOL’S CLOSED DUE TO AIDS
But, I thought that’s what pools were for!
“pool aid”?
Loverpool?
Fornication in the public pool is a good reason to have a concert!
Fornication in the public pool sounds like a good band name.
i think this is a WIN for the fornicators
Baaa.. BaHAHAHA!! Funnies! I would swim in there, no dramas!!
♬ I think we're alone nowThere doesn't seem to be anyone around
I think we're alone now
The beating of our hearts ♬
is the only sound
Hmmm. Not as intended. And yeah, I’m bored.
:[*squeeeeeeeeeze!*
*squeeze*
If you’re bored, they may have left the hot tub out from the cuddle puddle yesterday. Maybe we can contaminate it.
Unfortunately I have to work soon…
Bummer! No workin’ for the weekend, then?
THERE WAS A CUDDLE PUDDLE YESTERDAY?!?!?
We waited especially for you.
Thanks for thinking of me!
*wipes snot on sleeve*
*throws sleeve in pool*
*klaxons sound*
*men in hazmat suits rush into pool*
*announcement blared from speakers: “EVACUATE THE AREA IMMEDIATELY. THIS IS AN EMERGENCY ANNOUNCEMENT. DO NOT PANIC. I REPEAT, EVACUATE THE AREA IMMEDIATELY. THIS IS AN EMERGENCY ANNOUNCEMENT. DO NOT PANIC*
*SWAT burst through roof*
*the marines crash through wall in jeep*
*panic ensues*
*swimmers climb over each other in mad dash to escape*
*children trampled*
*elderly drown*
*thousands die*
*film at eleven*
*Raises hands over head*
Honestly officer, I only told some kids to stop screwing around in the pool!
I’m afraid there was, Judy. We had a sign and everything.
I’ll be there next week!!!
*squeeze*
Yay! We missed you!
*squeeze*
cuddle puddle?
is that what was left in the public pool?
Oh, thanks for that, AE.
so – how long does it take for a post shag decontamination?
Those tobacco smells can be troublesome.
I think this is a hybrid of fail and win. (Fin? Wail? Something like that, anyway.)
Win for the people who got lucky, but fail because of where they decided to do the tube steak boogie.
Also: *insert obligatory POOL’S CLOSED DUE TO X here*
posting fail
More like name fail on your part. (Unless, of course, you’re merely a precursor to HAL 9000.)
EPIC WHALE HAZ EPIC FIN
I hope her name was Cali, so we can do a song
Say, Roland, don’t you have a tower to be looking for?
To start over all again…? nah, not today
Fair enough. Here, have a beer.
*offers Roland a bottle of Sam Adams Winter Lager*
2 days after a yearly festivity celebrating the aging itself, someone finally offers me a drink^^
Thanks for that, skôl
*glug glug*
Cheers, mate!
*opens up a bottle of his own, clinks it against Roland’s*
Ahhh, Tears of the Gods….
*shrugs* If you say so, mate. I wouldn’t know anything about that – I’m more familiar with Ichor-LQ myself.
Haha It ponged again, visit my site for pong hot
pool
I’d probably freak out really hardcore if I was there when that happened…you know how you can tell if like a little kid is pooping, due to their facial exressions…? I’d book.
The cardboard sign lets you know that its a really classy place.
This sounds like a job for YouTube. . . .
I’m floored. They have to decontaminate because of potential STDs in bodily fluids.
In other words, pool really IS closed due to AIDS.
That comment has to be the most win one yet on this entry
I heard it was stingrays that have AIDS that were fornicating in the pool. That’s usually what it is.
As Homer J. would say: “Mmmmmhhmm…Fornication”
…with a cow
Chlorine douche – with special applicator
I thought you were supposed to use Lysol.
Pine Sol.
Formula 409.
frebreeze
They only closed the pool so they could finish filming the scene
he has a “VIAgra” chipset combined with a hot-plug-able harddrive, i bet XDD
I fornicate in my car 2 days ago, its contaminated?
hahahah
No. But only because you did it by yourself.
you mean. fornicate with yourself
i dont know… i call that a win.
Scary. My kid pooped in a pool once and they only closed for 15 minutes and there was no sign. How much fornication are we talking about here?
The management is Wasting Money and Time “Decontaminating” the pool. There is SO MUCH chlorine in a spa or pool, a person, even a person with AIDS, could have a bloody nose and no one would be at ANY risk. You could pour a GALLON of ANY bodily fluid into a 12,000-gallon pool and it would still be sterile. Now, if they are thinking that cleaning will make them “feell better,” by all means; clean away.
You are a reason why I avoid public pools.
The pool is always closed.
Well, twas TMI, and misspelled, but, if they were going to go that far, why didn’t they further describe how exactly they knew it had happened, who was involved, what happened when they were discovered….. Apparently there’s a good story, becasue they made this grand proclamation, as if it doesn’t (to their knowledge) happen quite regularly.
Don’t be such a tease!
TMI sign? Really, Pool Closed was all that was needed.
Wheres the evidence? Did someone see them or did they leave some physical evidence behind?
Pools Closed Due to AIDS.
*dances around Afroduck*
WIN!
I’ve done that
Did they put up a cardboard sign after?
There’s also a spelling fail. At least the submitter spelled ‘occurred’ correctly.
Pool’s closed due to aids
I was waiting for this.
POOL’S CLOSED DUE TO AIDS.
When iread this i masterbated, its so hot, fornication in a pool makes my bell go DING
lol ur name combined w/ ur comment makes me think of a little pichu doing that…lol. Static electricity!
OMG the sign is a fail. But thats fully a win though. Nothing like a bit of fornication to warrant a cardboard sign
inb4 pools closed.
Not into reading all the comments, huh?
lulz, pools closed due to aids.
Perhaps it was fueled by the beer tray that the sign is made out of? Wouldn’t it be great if it came printed like that?
What I’m wondering is how they managed to get the entire roof of the Royal Bank of Ankh-Morpork into the pool.
I used to work in a pool and we’d close every time some kid would throw up or poo in it. Happened at least once a week. We’d scoop out the offending substance, then go have lunch. No other chemicals were necessary to kill any germs, and nothing more was done, as the bromine in the water was plenty. We only closed for the day to make the patrons/parents think that the pool was being decontaminated further.
Eh, when you are swimming all your junk is touching the water…. what’s the difference?
/b/ got laid
Ten bucks says the guys who’s responsible is also the guys who’s holding the camera.
the best part is that the message is written on the halfway shelf of a 30pack
this comment chain is a WIN!
they never clos a pool when somebody took a dino…dino dropping in it!
Fornication like this, they’re going to need some extra chlorine!
“The pool is closed due to (/r/)AIDS and stingrays. Which also have (/r/)AIDS.”
in after “Pool’s closed due to AIDS”
T-M-I
………………..too much information
The chlorine in the water must have made for a nice touch. Ouch!
i think this is a win
The pool is always closed D:
POOL’S CLOSED