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Pedobear undercover
No, Pedobear doesn’t have a driver’s license.
Who’s driving? Bears driving! How can this be?
Well, as a bear, he can’t take a cab.
Where would he keep the fare?
Probably somewhere over there.
of course it’s pedobear – in a hippie van
It’s alright, it’s totally legit. They wouldn’t lie to us.
Would I lie to you?
Would I lie to you honey?
Now would I say something that wasn’t true?
I would
*squeeze*
I know you would cos you’re evil inside. :p
I like to flash my evil at unsuspecting people on the train
But are you “evil” enough to scare people, or just make them point anf laugh?
Evil enough, I should cocoa.
And to think I was a nice guy when I started reading this site.
I could be evil; I live backwards occasionally.
You are too angelic to be evil. but then again, you halo may be supported by horns.
Maybe I’m just vile then.
Do you eat St Ivel spread?
No, but I do wear Levi jeans!
Do you wear a veil over your eayes?
No, and neither did Elvis.
Elvis was fond of wearing silver.
also jumpsuits, but that doesn’t make it right.
He also liked a sliver of apple pie.
I thoought it was peanut butter and banana sandwiches fried in butter. Now that’s evil.
I don’t know whether to laugh or to cry.
ha ha. love you
hugs!
*le squeeze*
Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies
Marshmallows are made from condensed clouds coated in icing powder.
better than twinkies with cream filling.
Nooooooo it isn’t true!!! It’s not true!!! *runs off crying*
Oh, I thought they were cottonwool, lard and honey.
no, that’s the OTHER recipe. along with a few *uhem* magical ingredients.
would you like to try some, little girl?
Depends, how did you cook it?
Is your van legit?
MY BRETHREN! HOW DARE YOU!!
Initial rage aside, how did they taste?
A bit like candy floss.
Not like ham?
Take a look at K@’s pic and tell me you wouldn’t want to lure her in.
jam, too, for that matter.
*rollsqueeze*
I can’t take you cirrus cos I don’t know what you’re saying.
Just complimenting you on your charm and good looks.
My avatar is a cartoon lady with a gun. I could look like a giant frog with horse’s legs and a scorpion’s tail for all you know.
Phwoar!
*rubs trouserlegs*
It was the sting in my tail got you hooked, wasn’t it?
something like that.
horsie!
*rubs Moomin’s trouserlegs*
*collapses*
*horsiesqueeze*
Kinda like being prodded in the face with a weeble.
i had to google that, is this what you meant? (clickie)
I can’t see; is she carrying the Sacred Turd on her back?
what else would you bury you face in while burying your…. ahem
I’d aim not to bury my face in it…
A pony full of baloney?
Are you from the Church of the Poison Mind?
At first I was sceptical, but now I see: It’s Totally Legit!
The Totally Legit makes this a win.
This is a fail. Windows should be blacked out.
But then you’d doubt it’s legitness.
It’s got windows, it’s totally OK!!
Partyvan ftw
you v&!EPIC FAIL . OWNED .
Profound. Very. Profound.
Yes, and they will be offering free pony rides next week.
much better candy than that other red van…
The firetruck?
Ambulance.
Gosh, what a van-dal.
nice of you to join us K@. I guess a little free candy was all it took.
A bowl of soup, and a late shift, sorry to shatter your illusions!
You’ve souped up the candy van? How sweet.
Just a little tinker, sugar.
The turn of the screw.
Next he’ll be lighting up a stage and waxing a dumptruck like a candle.
Wax on wax off.
Car-ate kid?
We’re waxing historical by the lorry load.
Hey, I know Car-ate, and several other Japanese words like that.
Why only cops come to my legit candy van? And they never want candy!
Try offering donuts.
my candy brings all the pigs to the van
Totally Failit!
“Hey Billy do you like to float? everyone floats down here”
I got the !mage of a clown from this fail, and when I think about clowns I think of from the Stephen kings movie.
Too Legit to quit!
*puts on Hammer pants, dances*
I was told never to touch that, ever!
Touch what?
this, hammer time.
Clicky ^^^^ (what my friends get up to when they are bored)
That was great. Perfect timing.
belly goood!
Thanks for the earworm.
if this van’s a rockin’
the sweeties need restockin’
It really is sinfully shockin’
When Granny lowers his Christmas stockin’s.
With a body tired of mockin’
My brain now needs some beta blockin’
not so much stockin’
as pink sockin’
followed by some space dockin’
*doesn't bother knockin' ... just comes on it*typo! I meant "just comes on in"!(that's not how I'm used to talkin'!!)
whatever! sick! sick! sick!
*squeeze!*
You should have left it. I like the original better
Your touch I’ve been missin’
Under the mistletoe we should be kissin’
Windows? Amateur at best.
oh no it’s Hippedo! stay back kids! they’re not real sweets, they’re organic and sugar free!
flee! flee! before you fall victim to his body odour
Some of the sweets might be laced with a few special organics. Watch out for the brownies.
ok, it might be worth it. Ignore everything I just said kiddies!
Is Alice B. Toklas the baker?
Pedobear seal of approval.
it claps even while you’re clubbing it
*slips granny some rohypnol while clubbing**wakes up looking like she’s just blown a seal*
Does Bobby Seal know he’s been blown?
First
Yes. Yes, you are. You can cross that off today’s to-do list.
*shakes fluffy bunny tail at LGB*
Man i love the irony of “totally legit”. If you knew why candy vans wouldn’t be legit, that wouldn’t be great assurance as to its legitimacy. And if you were completely naive to why a candy van wouldn’t be legit, then you find out it can be from that phrase, and usually doubt the legitimacy of that van.
P.S. I bet this isn’t a real candy van, just some /b/tard’s side project.
NOT A REAL CANDY VAN!?!?
I feel betrayed.
But….but but but…it says legit…it’s not?
# The candy man can
Cause he mixes it with love
And makes the world taste good #
You want his number? ‘Cause I have it…
This is total fail. For christ’s sake, the van has WINDOWS all over. A proper “Candy Van” only has the windows in the front cabin, and the two on the back doors, which would be covered up or tinted black.
This is like a Guido Candy Van. Something Ed Hardy would design.
You re correct… Windows are a total failure.
Please, no designer Candy Vans. The posers will take over.
You only need windows if you want to see out, anyway.
The candy van from the Church of the Poison Mind? Who drives this… Boy George? Or Gary Glitter?
♫Tootsie Rooollls (hey) Tootsie Rolls
Tootsie Rooollls (Hey) Tootsie Rolls♪
That’s Sooooo Cruel! The Evil-Ness of people is just……ARGHHHHHHHHH
!
Stop it and play nice you dumb blog.
Raaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!
Yeah, that’s legit and cows are pink with green polka dots and speak pig latin and I’m the friggin queen of Canada!
Can I have your autograph, your highness?
yes you may.
can i ur highness?
‘frigging queen’ or frigging ‘queen’?
Friggot queen?
Let’s not go arounf correcting the queen’s grammar or it will be “off with your head”
it would be even more “legit” if it was windowless lol
And topless.
Bottomless in some states.
*says candyvan five times*
*HONNNNNKKKKKSPLAT*
Blaarg.
Like this?
Candyvan, candyvan, candyvan, candyvan, candyvan.
Should I run now?
oops
wasn’t this van in Barely Illegal 15 gRape edition. the one with that hobbit and his androgynous younger pet mushroom.
omg i need some sleep, gotta set my roflclock for 2morrow morning. and i need to lay off these wierd sweets i got today.
I GOTS SOME CANDY CANES O.o
WIN!!!
It must be legit. He’s got windows!
I like the part where the photo implies that the van belongs to a pedophile.
They’ll give you candy in exchange for helping them find their lost puppy. Also they know your mom and they want to take you to go see her. -_-;
Cool. Does that really work?
Thats a WIN!
total pedovan
“Nothing suss!”
They forgot to tint the windows. I weep at such a forgotten pedophile necessity.
YAY! free candy!
Good to know its ligit. 
That bus is too ligit to quit. I would totally let any child in my care go near it. 
oops typo *LEGIT!* i was dumb
Why is this a fail? PedoHippie is total win.
I know pedobear is inside their finding for lolies
And right now, this is sitting right below a Michael Jackson fail.
Juxtaposition win.
Just lol
Hahahahaha what a pedophile van. Kids watch out for this one. Wayyyyy too funny.
To paraphrase Wayne Brady: “Hey! Wanna see what’s in my picanic basket?”
THATS MY VAN! Hahaha. I love this. And yes, it really and truly is mine. I hated it and it’s 7mpg, so a friend of mine attacked it.
That’s so funny.
get in the back of my van for some candy…>:3
Connecticut Plates, that state is filled with wackos
Actually, it’s a van that Central Connecticut State University uses for group field trips. I believe some club trying to be funny painted it that way. I see it on campus all the time.
*Gasp* I’m offended that somebody would think CCSU had anything to do with this van. Stupid friggin school doesnt even know how to file health forms, let alone try to be funny. Its honestly just my van. Pedophiling habits aside, the looks I get are hilarious when people realize there’s a chick driving.
Brooks Orpik is out driving again? shouldn’t he be getting ready for his next hokeygame?
haha i would do this I’ma just a creep like that
Incredible!
bear can drive
WANT. I want this van… All my friends would think it was hilarious if I were driving it. lol
nice. XD
Crafty man… No way anybody’s gonna spot that pedifile on the loose…
… i dont get it…
Looks trustworthy
I legit own this van it is parked in my yard and owned by my older sister
the cops pulled her over and searched the van because they thought some pedophile owned it.
“Totally Legit!” LMAO!