Closed Caption Fail
“We get to eat a porn star”
Picture by: TheDon817 Submitted by: Thedon817 via Fail Uploader
-
-
Copy & paste this:
« Previous I'm intrigued | Lineman Fail Next »
You’re either very hungry or very kinky
» 386 Failures in Communication
Leave a Reply
Popular FAIL Videos
-
Recent Failures in Communications
Dely23 on Poorly Dressed: Dressed to Win… thestupid on FAIL Nation: Wicked Awesome Ca… DrunkenShark on Parenting Fails: This Child is… Dely23 on Poorly Dressed: Dressed to Win… Katsumi Lawliet on FAIL Nation: Blaming The Cat… Dely23 on WIN!: Hand Lettering WIN mew on School of Fail: Celebrate Blac… Dely23 on There I Fixed It: Making Break… DrunkenShark on FAIL Nation: Double Embarrassm… Seve on Ugliest Tattoos: Tattoo WIN: T… 
Cheezburger Company Blog
cunningEating out?
Get used to disappointment.
tastes like chicken
*tastes*
Hmmm … more like frog legs to me.
Sounds a bit fishy.
smells a bit fishy
If it smells like fish, she needs a Dr. Eww!
HEY!
Hay is for horses.
Neigh! i’m a girrafe!
Tastes like crabs
♥♺ ☂
Your conclusion seems fallacious.
orly?No, tongue-in-cheek.
linquist.
Perhaps just adept at the Norman tongue?
Only beyond 1066 parceps.
MEET / EAT fail!
This is why I use hulu instead of watching TV.
♪
Zach still wants a hulu loop.You are into jumping thru hoops?
The Mongols were riding their horses like crazy before they ate them…
Made the meat softer.
Tender?
pass the bbq sauce on the gifted children! Me loves me some young chess masters.
I could broker you a deal…
Best make sure you check who you’re dealing with first. And do it at knight.
Be careful you don’t get rooked by a pawn queen.
There really isn’t a way of snea-king a bishop in, is there? (Except that s/he once mitre been a vicar … .)
Y-you can’t eat me!
Don’t be turning the pony into tasty baloney.
Oh, Arthur…your avatar just made me very, very happy.
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
*ska-WEEEEEZE!*
*squeeze!*
YAY!!! I’m stuck in my house because of the ice and snow and howling wind! No school for me today.
*lights a fire*
*gets a soft, warm blanket*
*schnuggles up with kittens*
*replenishes basket of squeezes for the failpeeps*
*is jealous*
That nasty weather is on its way here. The low for tonight is supposed to be 6. Single digit weather, oh joy.
We haven’t reached as high as freezing in about a week.
*shivers*
In about half an hour I get to walk to my mothers office. A mile and a half away. And back. Thank GOD I got new earmuffs last weekend.
16 degrees here at the moment…brrrrrrr. I’m going back to bed.
What do you call a Polar bear wearing ear muffs? Anything you want because he can’t hear you!
I have a golden rule to always be polite to anything that could eat me.
Your current avatar…well, scary wouldn’t be an appropriate description…
Slow. DW’s current avatar.
I’d want much more than good manners if I’m going to eat that kind of meat. Just sayin’
*opens note book*
And what exactly do you need? Yeah, gimme a list.
*sigh*
Being cute is SUCH a curse.
You couldn’t afford it. :p
*boops DW’s nose*
god i love florida. The low is 70 right now
*sits politely*
*looks expectantly at DW’s basket*
makes plan to disguise as kitty if necessary……
nesting fail
I would make a few happy too if all he was wearing was just that santa hat.
Hehehe! I managed to add the hat, I’m unable to remove his pants.
*proffers scissors*
*swings hand*
Stone! I win!
Hmmm. Is it “rock”?
\…/
_
\/
\…/ = rock- 70′s metal style.
.
_ = paper
.
\/ = scissors
I liked my first guess better.
When I saw that I thought:
\…/ = Plus size women
\/ = Skinny woman
_ = young girl
Yes my mind is always in the gutter.
“We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.” – Wilde
\~/ = a nice relaxing drink.
[_]> = empty beer glass.
you rockCut it out.
This better not be a Pa-Per-Pun Run. I can never afford them
Not even by the sheet?
Jon, that is just pulp fiction
*Flutters threw thread like a loose leaf*
Is this The Paper Chase?
Sigh. . .
*Sends page for coffee*
*Bukkits*
is the page recycled?
If you mean previously booked, yes.
I’ll bet the dali lamma is delicious
Muttonheads are old and stringy.
mmm…. tastes like burning
Thanks to Obama.
Whut? What’s he gotta do with that?
He sports a shit-eating grin?
Your conclusion seems facetious.your feces seems conclusive.
Hrmf. Second.
Grrr. Minute.
Argh. Hour.
Pfft. Year.
Hrmph. Decade.
Blah. Decade.
Gah. Century.
Ach. Millennium
Bah. Eon.
Ooops. Era.
gw = end of a error.
Ah. Eternity!
Hmm. Do two decades make us decadent?MILTITUDIA… that’s the land where the millionths live
FOURBILLIONTRON DECLARES WAR ON MILTITUDIA!!!!
SAYS EMPEROR BILLIONION.
You can change your name but you still act like a Dork.
FOURBILLIONTRON DECLARES WAR UPON THEE
And Jimmy cracked corn, but you know what?
Erk. day
Blech. Week.
.Sigh. Weak.heh. late.tsk. timing is everything.
mmm. I like to watch.Tic, tic, tic. . .Timex. . .it takes a licking and keeps on ticking.
Does it have an impressive … pendulum?
By the looks of this thread, someone’s been tampering with the Time Space Continuum again.
*nods*
I reversed the polarity.
Call me Cronos
um. what's your number?42
That's your answer to everything.It’s mine, too!
3. Safety
Darn it. Now I want pie.
Yer in luck, BBB, cuz I just finished a nice cheesecake pie… now, help me decide the topping: bing cheery, tart cherry, NC blueberry or ME blueberry?
Tart cherry please. I like the contrast.
*squeezies*
Thinkgeek broke space-time when they started selling these. Clicky.
That’s your Continuum Hypothesis?
Q.
The answer is always Q.
If you had seen the last post, you would realise the answer to everything is an amature picture if charizard.
lol forman is gay
uhmmm yeah I meant to write “Foreman” with an E
A bar called “Forman” might be a place for gays…
touche’ sir.
I would totally go to a bar called Fourman and there might actually be hot chicks too!- hot chicks love gays. But when I went there were just a bunch of fat fayhags instead and they wouldn’t even sleep with me. But 4 men wanted to.
Ummm… Thanks for sharing?
help me Blastoise!
use your super effective water canon!
Once a Dork, always a Dork.
I remember that episode when house eats a prostitute while the black guy watches and drools. That was a good one. I think he had Lymphoma.
You think?
I think it was lupus, actually.
It’s never Lupus
I’m a fan of eating out.
I like to stay in my House.
I like to stay in your house
Um…
Remember that ignore button? USE IT!!!
And… *morning squeezes*
*pounds on IgnoreButton™*
*doesn’t shine anymore*
*sigh*
*morningSqueezesToYouToo*
*hands Leila a canister of glitter*
If it can’t shine, make it sparkle!
*dumps entire canister on button*
Ooooooooooooooh!!!! Purty!!!! Now all I have to do is just let it dry. Hopefully I won’t need it any sooner.
This is gonna get messy.
you should have hired Blastoise with his super effective water canon to clean it.
Can I get my spoon on now, Avis?
I don’t think it’ll do much but for it. Some carnage in the morning might be just the think to wake me up.
“Go” for it.
See? Not awake yet it seems.
Well, I got it on, but the unmentionable seems to have disappeared…
Dreamer.
Aw, shucks!
*walks away, kicking rocks*
Glad to see you’re still getting use out of that spoon LGB, even if not for this fail.
Yes, it’s really quite nice. Thanks very kindly, Scotty!
*squeeze*
No.
si. bueno.
it’s not like we can go to my house- there’s el roaches!
i’m slowly turning into el mariachi de los muertos!
did it work?
Kid don’t stop talking so much he’ll get his tongue sun burned.
This is going to cause more confusion than a mouse at a Burlesque show.
Whey does it … V … talk so much?
Vocal diarrhea?
Is that a German thing? Hehe!!
It’s an AWT.
(See Troll Identification Page for definition.)
ROFL!!
Fits like a glove.
*returns from Burlesque show feeling foggy*
let me get this straight:
Don’t Stop Talking?
so you
do not
want me to stop talking? or rather “Keep Talking” or else your tongue gets it.
well I guess I’ll keep talking then. This is an odd bank robbery.
What she is suggesting, Dork, is that you turn your computer off and give your fingers a rest. Perhaps you could make better use of your time by heading out to the woodshed out back?
I hear, in certain eateries, the waitresses display their cunning stunts for entertainment.
is it hooters?
because i’ve seen them hooters girls do hoola hoops and damned if I almost died from witnessing such a cunning stunt. Oh wait you said Cunning. mybad
Wanna hit my IgnoreButton™?
*squeezes Leila’s buttons*
*runsawayfast*
Chicken!! You should stayed here for some payback.
*sticks out foot and trips Arthur*
Oops. Were you not paying attention to me?
Leila, I believe this is your vengence moment?
*steps aside with small bow*
You to be careful where you do your bowing…and in what company…
It was a VERY small bow. All shoulders and head.
I wasn’t about to be bending over in this company while blogging about pron.
. snork .
Carefully! If you hit it too hard glitter will end up *poofing* all over.
No. It’s dry. See?
*hits IgnoreButton forcefully*
Uh oh!
*turns to look*
*FBpeeps and room is covered in glitter*
Ooopsy???
Oooo. . . everything’s shiny.
Hit the strobe lights!! We’re DISCO BALLS!!!
♫Won’t you take me to…………Funkytown♪
happy and shiny!
I feel pretty!
*decorates Leilas’ IgnoreButton™ with fairy lights*
Eeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!! FAIRY LIGHTS!!!! IB’s never looked better!!!!
*ThankYouSqueezies*
Wait. Are these battery operated or do they magically stay lit? BOB doesn’t like to share batteries.
BOB doesn’t like it, or you don’t like it?
Yes.
agreed
Magic of course!
More fun that way!
Yay!!!
hey that’s how just some of us get off okay- don’t forget about the ice and the chainsaw next to me on the couch
hi fives all around!
You really should type with BOTH hands, Dork. One-handed typing in mixed company is just… so debased.
The bad news, it’s Ron Jeremy.
*shudders*
Yeah, I regret writing that one a little. :ick:
I just don’t get how anyone who looks like Cheech Marin, can be a pr0n star!
It’s truly one of life’s great mysteries.
Well…no one actually knows what his face looks like.
*snork*
Actually, they’ve proven that one wrong.
And a comedian did a great bit on just that subject.
Ron White?
I forget the guys real name, he’s the one that says “You can call me Tater Salad”.
And I wouldn’t be surprised if he ripped the bit off from someone else.
It’s Ron White. I like watching him. He is the funniest one in the bunch IMO.
I loved the bit he did on guys watching pr0n. I was in tears I was laughing so hard!
I know several guys who had to stop and re-think their whole outlook on pr0n because of him.
Those men who are secure in their sexuality kept watching. All others changed channels.
My fav is when he got thrown out of the bar and of course any time he talks about his dog.
Did you notice he is getting more rotund? Is he eating the money?
Too much mayonnaise is likely the culprit. Potato salad has a lot of mayonnaise.
And the drinking, don’t forget the drinking. Goes through a bottle of scotch every time he gets on stage.
I wonder how his wife can stand the stench of smoke and booze day in day out?
Yup, that’s Ron.
I agree with Jules. I dig the chicks… well, back when I still watched the super-8′s.
Even so… I just wouldn’t!
*shudders*
I would. Just for that ‘Born in East L.A.’ Money.
This fail was brought to you by Closed captioning.
or was it Foremen beating Even Stone with a candle stick in the morgue??
The implants are really chewy.
And they’re a little over salted.
More than a mouthful is such a waste.
Why can’t you eat prawn stars, that is just shellfish.
I could go for that!
are prawn ‘stars’ that poopy stuff that comes out of shrimp before you cook em?
or are they prawn in the shape of stars?
No, they’re women who haven’t washed down there for a few days.
I never!
???
That was suppose to be my eyes rolling to the back of my head, as my seizure started, from being so grossed out.
You mean… I actually grossed you out?
Ladies and gentlemen, my work here is done!
I gotta say…I have never seen Jules grossed out. ^5 jam!!!
Now, let us work on granny.
Think of the collateral damage!!!
We are gonna need a bigger bukkit.
yeah… think of the rest of us.
(will now and forever have the impression that jam just doesn’t wash… “down there.”)
I’ve done Granny…
umm… I mean I made him mini puke once. 
*goes to visit DW’s Shop*
I remember, but can’t find which fail it was now.
ht tp://failblog.org/2009/07/23/thong-fail/#comment-532188
*flees*
Yup! I have it!
ht tp://failblog.org/2009/07/23/thong-fail/#comment-532179
I am just NOT fast enough today.
Stoopit cold fingers.
*tickletickle*
Heeeee–*GIGGLE*!!
How did you know that’s the only place I’m ticklish??!
I have magic fingers.
Someone should be taping this.
IDK, if this went public people might start planning to eat Jam or DW, which would suck.
Hah! Forget it! You’ll end up vomiting while he’s just warming up.
*roffles*
It’s a tough challenge, but far from impossible.
I wasn’t going to be in the vicinity when that happens.
:ick:
hey the longer the marinated…the sweeter the meat?
They taste like crab.
That sounds a bit fishy.
and anuljuice walrus
That’s a scary plaice you’re in right there…
But prawns aren’t kosher. How about some imitation Krab!TM instead?
Umm…. cook thoroughly to avoid risk of disease.
No amount of cooking would free those nasties of any kind of disease.
Inciniration would work though.
Reincarnation?
Nope…you don’t get reincarnated from a *FOOOOOOOOM!!!*
Yeah, it just takes forever for your hair to grow back. :p
Tarnation!
Damnation!
Carnation!
dude i saw this episode, it should say ‘we get to treat a patient.’
stupid caption lmao
Don’t they always treat patients?
It's a trick.Clap trap.
Someone is playing golf?
Umm.. I would hate to have sex with the peson who thought eating out was Kinky! OMG… whats next- sex with the lights ON?
ooh that’s way too risky with the lights on- you could see all my cold sores!
maybe if you promised to close your eyes.
They should eat Cameron.
Goodness! I almost didn’t recognize my FPs, you all are so very festively decked-out! Way to really get in the spirit!
YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT THE SAME PERSON, METHINKS.
Oops. That wasn’t pre, was it?
*SNORK!!*
*SNORK!!*
What??
Why??
porqué??
porque.
You have to love the Spanish language.
Couldn’t I take it out to dinner first, and get to know it before I decide if I’m in love?
Nope. We don’t do that in pre-arranged marriages. Now get to loving it!!!
I got what you meant Avis.
It’s nice to know basic Spanish/Mexican/whateveritishisnameisin
It does come in handy.
Muchas Gracias, pajarito.
Pajarita.
sorry. My Spanish isn’t great.
I don’t speak Spanish and I am not Hispanic.
*nasal voice*
Continental Baggage Claim!
Can I help you?
Yes, hello. I’d like to report some extra baggage. What does it look like? Well, it’s kind of black. Yeah. And it sort of looks like one of those things you use to make quilts…
Please leave a message after the tone…BEEEEEEEEEEEEP!
Hooray!
*hangs up*
It’s really feeling christmassy around here! Someone needs to ask Ben and Emily to put up some tinsel, maybe a tree?
*hangs ornaments on Jon*
S’nicey!
Wait … this one’s kinda dangling a little bit…
THAT’S NOT AN ORNAME…
*winces*
Ooooh, that’s gonna sting.
Ouches!
That ornament definitely DIDN’T “need another pin in it!”
You’ve got a “pin” in one of ‘em?
Whadda … fu …. ?
You put it there! That wasn’t an ornament!
Nononono … it was an ornament on a hanger, not a pin!
AGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
*head asplodes*
well then, that’s entirely different
Most importantly … WHY?
*sigh* is it too late to blame Arthur for this whole débacle?
LGB was hanging ornaments on me and said one was a little wonky and then DW said something about it not being an ornament and so I simply presumed it was innuendo and tried to continue it and now this has happened and it’s quite embarrassing.
Why is it embarassing?
It is just an extra hole……fnar fnar!
Oh, Dios mío! Ahora tengo duda de que necesitamos la lejía mente
Yes, yes we do.
ok.ok.
*puts a Christmas wreath around Jon’s neck*
This should make us forget what happened down south.
Yeah, I got the same thing when I got my Nerf balls. It’s so you don’t chew at the stitches.
Um…should I ask why you have stitches or just run the other way?
*drapes tinsle on Jules nerf ball*
wow….what a thread….
wow…what a needle…
The thimble was sadly disappointing.
The bobbin stole the show.
I sew what you did there.
This’ll make a pretty good yarn.
After some hemming and hawing maybe.
Seams okay to me.
I lost it….
the thread i mean…
I found it.
What do you want with it?
Poke it in the eye.
Cry as Leila unravels the pun-run?
Let her be, stop needling her. Tsk!
So you’re no knit wit?
Not today. Besides, I MAY have found a needle in the haystack so technically I am safe, yes?
Yes, you wool be safe
I still don’t think we can stitch it together.
It was a stitch up though!
Sorry Wendy, less tongue next time.
Okay, all. Time to work.
I’ll be back later … and I’m bringing ketchup!
What’s Arthur going to do with ketchup?
Undress, lay down, wait.
*winkwinkwink*
Is he doing his hamburger impression again? Waiting for someone to bring the sauce?
Lettuce hope she brings it then or Leila is gonna get cold.
Wait what? Plus, doesn’t AE have his own sauce-age?
Either that or herpes.
I’d rather ET a pop-star
Pepsi or Coke?
Helps wash down the poop-star.
Cats.
No, dogs.
Cat-star… My FAV!
CANINEist!!!!!
Dogstar?
You cannot be sirius.
They won’t complain. I think they only oppose animals getting harmed…
not “hammered”??
Hmmm. Depends on their facial expression, I’d say.
Animal sex is the dogs bollocks.
Why wouldn’t that get moderated?
Blogmonsters have to get their kicks somehow …
*Snickers*
Brit humour has a knack of giving U.S. censorship the slip.
*Immoderate squeeze*
Depends which PETA you mean, I suppose. (Clickie)
Because it’s not just the stars you might eat. …
Foreman you bad boy!!
*steps up to the microphone*
*ahem*
Sit on my face and tell me that you love me,
I’ll sit on your face and tell you I love you, too.
I love to hear you o-ra-lize,
When I’m between your thighs,
You blow me awaaay.
Sit on my face and let my lips embrace you,
I’ll sit on your face and then I’ll love you tru-ly.
Life can be fine if we both sixty-nine,
If we sit on our faces
In all sorts of places
And play…’till we’re blown awaaaaaaaaaay.
*thank you*
Encore! Encore!
You came on my piiiiiiilooooooow…
C’mon, everybody knows its NEVER Lupus.
Oral sex is “very kinky”???
Who knew the guys at failblog were so prudish…
Fail? House MD WIN!!!
lol yes I do believ the line was something like “We get to treat a pron star” it was funny then, MUCH funny now XD Thanks Fail-Caps!!
I won’t be surprised. It’s from House
Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy so many people are interested in an interracial relationship. black woman want to have fun with white man and black guys want to have fun with white women. There are many sites focusing on this kind of relationships such as [_www.BlackwhiteCupid.com_] recommend it here= – [_www.BlackwhiteCupid.com_]
Damnit, this isn’t how you practice medicine!
It’s how you practice cannibalism, though. Cool beans.
dont say it liek its a bad thing! XD
I only eat real breasts. It’s a hard life. Especially without all those painkillers House has.
I cannot believe that not one person on here said it yet, but here it goes:
OM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM!!!
Not even the lord knows how much meat was placed in that taco before you bit into it like a starving dog.
Haha gotta love House, Skin Deep was one of my favorite episodes.
It’s not lupus…it’s never lupus
What did the deaf population think?…
oh foreman you are a card
im pretty sure he said TREAT, but you know what, its still funny!
That makes the episode even more interesting.
HI I’ M BENDER
I am finding this episode… Right noa.
is that a real caption?