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Cheezburger Company Blog
smokin'*replies using smoke signals*
Puff space puff puff space puffpuffpuff
*passes along the message**realises hair is on fire*
*dives into toilet to put out inflagration*
That’s why I use flags.
*waves*
and now … julius caesar on an aldis lamp!
*blink blink* Et tu, brute!
*looks confused and stabs Zomgman in the back*
Like that? Or are you talking about something else?
*snork*
i guess this is just one of those “simply unexplainable” pictures, middle eastern kid, with a puma shirt and a a boat steering wheel on the background, and a pack of gigantic marlboro red’s
Possibly not, I have the uncanny ability to harm myself with the most mundane of objects, including air.
Surely not custard though?
I mean, you’d be a pretty poor quality custard pool attendant if custard hurt you.
The Marlboro Little ManBut where is his horse?
He's not dead yet!I will borrow my Grannies ear trumpet then.
I wouldn’t, k@ … you don’t know what Granny’s done with that thing…
*shudders*
*snork!*
*contemplates*
So, when I cleaned it out…….that wasn’t ear wax was it.
*pales*
*sits and rocks in the corner*
*squeezes*
….a nicotween.
... a tar baby...Tobbacco toddler
A smokin’ (hot) baby.
Smokin’ sibling
Isn’t that a poster of U2′s album “war” behind him?
Yes. U2 + kids + cigarettes = Good advertising for the photography studio who shot this pic.
The Salvador Dali Family Portrait Studio.
Come to think of it, that wagon wheel does look a bit … saggy. Or is that just my lack of caffeine this morning?
*saggyMondaysqueezeGS*
Maybe this will help.
*caffienatedLGBsqueeze*
Yes. Yes, it did.
I think you just have a bad case of the Mondays….
Quite possible. I never really wake up until Friday…
and then you dive into the nearest cuddlepuddle!!
Yup. And ska-weeeze my FPs with all my might!
*squeezyzooomy*
*mondaysqwaeeeezyLGB*
LOL!!
Smoker Friendly- The nicotine gnome
Is that what you chew when you want to give up?
Nip your Travelocity addiction.
Huge Cigs!
Come on, it’s obviously a miniature kid.
And a miniature wheel in the background
Mary must be proud.It’s all that rolling.
TINY WHEEL! WEEEEEE!
Nice marketing there
Midgets piss me off.
People with dog necks do it for me. Ruff!
You’ve come a long way, baby.
So round, so firm, so fully packed.
... although Virginia's butt is slim.I’d rather fight than switch!
... hmm, we may need to conduct a Salem's switch trial.Lady be Cool!
I feel alive with pleasure today!!!
That Merits More than just a mere *snork*, BG. You’ve got the adVantage, now.
That’s the American Spirit!
me too
Me three.
My son just turned four yesterday.
Awwwww! Did you have any of his rugrat peeps over for the party?
My small little house was full to the brim with little preschoolers! It was pretty crazy.
How did the cake turn out?
What kind was it?
Wall-E
I’m pretty proud of myself. I posted pics on facebook, it’s in the birthday album.
Okay. I’ll go take a look…
Your kids are soooo cute, Ms B. And the cake turned out great!
Cheers!
Thanky!
Did you make a sheet cake or a 3D standing wall-e?
I bought one of those Wilton pans, in the shape of Wall-E, with a paint-by-numbers instruction on how to frost. It took me three hours to frost. I am a novice on cake deorating, so I was just glad it looked like the robot instead of just a pile of frosting!
It looks great! No need to submit it to Cake Wrecks, that’s for sure. Did the crowd of preschoolers have fun?
Thanks, Gracie. The kids had a lot of fun. And I guess that’s the most important part. This was my first party with kids other than cousins, so it was a bit stressful for me!
When my oldest turned five, she invited her whole Girl Scout troop, and they all came! Plus cousins and friends from down the street. It was a madhouse, but they all had so much fun! We split the parties now, separate ones for friends and family. Makes it a bit less chaotic. That and they’re older, of course. *gets misty-eyed*
*sits in corner in fear* I hope my son will want to go to one of those Chuck E type places.
When I have children, I hope I can look this guy’s number up. Most awesome prop ever.
This is definitly a win. And look how happy the kid is!
Actually, I want my picture taken with this RIGHT NOW. This is a great Chirstmas card photo opportunity.
The kid’s parents need a good slap upside the head.
No, they are rebels. Your social mores mean nothing to them.
Next year: He’ll take pictures holding a smoking gun standing over a “dead” body. It’ll be a hoot!!!
Owl’s that then?
Who would do something like that?
A twit.
A loon.
... with a cuckoo glock.Made me want a cigarette. Or is that missing innocence I smell?
Nope, team spirit.
Not teen spirit? Good, they stink anyway.
Ting spirit.
Sounds like Nirvana.Smoking definitely hamsters growing. Damn, I could have been so much taller.
It doesn’t hamper gerbils though.
You get Gerbils in hampers now?
Don’t they eat all the other food?
Ewww! Why would you put food in with your dirty clothes??
But I would expect mice to be present.
They need energy to run the tumble cycle.
*Ferrets out all of the dirty laundry*
*Squeezes to all*
That way they come out all fluffy!
But what if I don’t want them to come out smelling like a f… uh, nevermind.
Better than having them come out of Fluffy!
I rely on rodents to eat the food OFF of the dirty clothes. If they do a thorough job, I can skip the wash entirely.
Do you at least take them out of the hamper before you load the clothes into the machine? Rodents can become expensive depending how often you do the wash.
Chinchillas specifically.
Nimble little minks...Appearantly, it also hamstered (sic) my verbal skills…
Appearantly (sic!).
Apparitionally?
You're just seeing things.I’m in the spirit of things.
Isn’t it a little early in the day to be having liquor.
It’s noon somewheres, GS.
*hic*
Jack: You wanna beer?
Ron: It’s 7 o’clock in the morning.
Jack: Scotch?
*snorekitty*
Awww, it’s so cute!
*Pets the Snorekitty gently so it doesn’t wake*
I love animals. Explains all my spelling missnakes.
FIRST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yes. Yes, you are. You can cross that off today’s to-do list.
Next, we will dance!
*wiggledances*
When did Marlboro get in the business of using Oompa Loompas?
♪ What do you get when you smoke cig-a-rettes? ♫
♪ A fine lung tumor or tu-ber-cu-lo-sis ♫
♪ Why don’t you try a Copenhagen Red? ♫
♪ That way you’ll get a nice lip cancer instead ♫
Maybe it’s the Surgeon General reminding us that smoking stunts your growth?
George Shrinks: The rebellious years.
*snork*
*Buttahcowsqueeze*
Was he in a pool?
i am going to say it… this is photoshopp’d!!! (hehe jus kidding)
no… you’re absolutley right… which boy who can wear a puma shirt, would wear kitty-socks? srsly…
No I think you are right look at his left hand. It is resting on something, or at least it should be.
It’s resting on his laurels….
Bring your child to work day at Phillip Morris.
I work at Trojan, we have “child to work” day next week. You should see our photo studio! I’ll post the pictures of my son.
Can’t wait, BG!
Um…. BG works where? And you want to see that picture? I’m a little frightened, myself.
Joe Camel eat your heart out.
Can we talk about U2′s “War” album in the background of this photo shoot?
Good call! That’s a fail on a whole different level, right there.
Why would the photo studio have a huge pack of cigs as a prop anyway? the family probably saw it in the back of the prop room and though it would be funny.
The family is not that funny then.
lol!
Tom Thumb is proud of his addiction.
He only smokes one pack a month.
And even then, he doesn’t inhale.
He’s now quit completely, but wraps himself up in a nicotine patch every morning.
Yes, but what does the wagon wheel have to do with anything? It’s all so non-sequitor. I’m so confused!
*goes to corner*
*rocks back and forth and cries*
Sweetie…….you are sitting on me!
We need a whole other room for corner rocking. This one is getting full.
*Writes note to self*
construct room for Failpeeps to rock within, it should be
1. Soothing
2. Non threatening
3. Decorated with thick duvets on the wall
3a. And round (for safety).But, but, then there would be no corners.
*head explodes*
*sends keshet to the coroners**sweeps remnants of brain matter into neat pile*
*saves in Daisy Seal-A-Meal™ bag for ZA’s afternoon noms*
I’m reaaaaaaaaaaaaaaallllllly bad at geometry, but, could there be 360 corners in a circle if you wanted to look at it that way?
*headassplodes*
# I wanna rock within
All night #
Sowwy, k@.
Smoke two joints.
…and call me in the morning.
Smoke two joint before i smoke two joints…
and then I smoke two more
Lost count after that.
huh, wazat?
Pizza…
*perks up*
Did somebody say pizza?
nom nom nom
*makes note in log in honor of Brewski*
*mentalsqueeze for Brewski*
The legend of the Smoking Elf is True!!!
This has to have been taken somewhere in Egypt. I swear.
Then don’t, some say it is quite rude to do that.
We will wash your mouth out with soap.
Thpall I shhhaidth fflwas “pppiffleth” shhand woook thwaht hapbbpened thoo mflmfee!
Blimey LGB, we cant understand a F*%$”£ing word you’re f*^&”ing saying! All that soap in your mouth must be a right load of -
*mmf!*
I toftalsy underfland nowth
*points and laughs at Jon and LGB*
I think the kid looks more Hispanic. Cuban or Peurto-Rican maybe. he doesn’t really look very Arabic or Coptic.
Ewww. I’m not taking that anywhere, no matter how much you swear.
extra-coronary renditionHoly shit, it’s the real Mike TV.
*mind blown*
*adds Martin C.’s brain bits to ZA’s nom bag ^^^*
Oh look, he donated it. How nice for ZA!
Then I guess it is true that smoking stuns your growth.
It can certainly take your breath away.I know- that guy is actually 32.
…looks like Ralph Macchio…
I used to have a 60-a-day habit, now I’m down to one pack a day. . .
…but I go through Bic lighters like mad!
Being politically correct is such a drag…
The lyrics of “Lean On Me” come to mind.
Yay!!!! Micro Macro!!!!
Happy Monday, everyone.
Ugh, I have a terrible cold and am about 20 minutes away from meeting the girl of my dreams for a christmas dance. Do you reckon she’ll go for the excessive amounts of snot dribbling down my face?
um, no
:ick:
No. Bring plenty of ShamWows™.
Good luck!
Of course! ShamWows™ will solve all my problems!
Thanks LGB
(But seriously, it’s typical life, isn’t it?
)
ack, have to leave now
Oh well, everyone’s ill in Winter aren’t they? They are, right? Right? Someone?
wish me plenty of luck, i’m seriously going to need it.
Good luck and look at it this way. If she’s still interested when you’re in this condition you know she’s serious about it.
*nods in agreement*
*goodlucksqueezes for Jon*
*pets GS*
*wishes Jon well*
*snaps photo of Scott in hat*
Good Luck!
It didn’t go well.
Turns out that because my best mate doesn’t have a cold, he wins.
Honestly, you couldn’t write this, could you?
Back home, I’m a twenty-a-day man.
and now, away from home?
Wow. I bet you need cigarettes, with a schedule like that.
NEXT!!!!!!!
wow i think i never saw such a small child oO
I get it! There are supposed to be 20 cigarettes in the box, but he only got 14, right?
I’ll say it’s a fail! The box clearly states that there are 20 cigs but when viewing the contents one can see there are only 14. Scandal if I ever saw one.
Dang…These things really do stunt your growth!!
smoke
smmoke
are you smokin yet!!??
I heard smoking will stunt your growth but damn…
God bless America!
Exactly. Although that picture was taken in Egypt.
This guy is one of my good friends. This picture was taken when he lived in Egypt and definately not fake. i’ve seen the 10 yr old original photo.
“we’re going to need a bigger lungs”
it bothers me that the carpet is dirty
“yea they didnt even card me”
worst “fail” ever
This is a simple example of cause and effect: If you smoke during pregnancy, your child will undergo severe growth defects.
Obviously it is the child that’s small, not the cigarettes that are large.
CURTIS!
bad Photoshop…look at the position of his hand, it was holding something in the original picture
how’d you know
After Willy Wonka, Mike Teavee had a hard time finding gigs.
Class A cigarettes for a Class A picture
Umm…. Shouldn’t this be filed under “Epic Parenting Fail!”?
i dont get it
cool mascot
You guys realize it’s photoshopped, right? The kid’s hand is curled up, like it was around the corner of a chair.
It looks like the size sticker is still on his shirt.
TOTAL FAIL!!! KIDS DON’T SMOKE!!!
Perhaps those big cigarettes are just what a constant smoking addict needs!
Wow…they’re really settin’ him up for success!