Mom and Dad must be so proud
Marriage Fail
Man marries video game girlfriend
A man weds a virtual girlfriend available on the Nintendo dating simulator, Love Plus.
Picture by: dunno source Submitted by: dunno source via Fail Uploader
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*Mario theme plays*
Well that would be an interesting wedding march.
OH GOD THE WORLD IS GOING TO END
Everyone should be ashamed — especially Asians. How in the world will Asian men ever be respected when all we see in the media are idiotic things like this? I demand he be sentenced to death.
I move that we sentence to death not only for doing, but also the saying of stupid things!
Internet should be clear in no time.
This is not real. This has been confirmed by Japanese media to be a publicity stunt set up by Konami to promote the company’s line of life-like simulation games.
The real identity of the groom SAL9000 is kept a secret for obvious reasons. However, some tabloids claim that SAL9000 in real life does not wear glasses and has a completely different hairstyle.
The bottomline is… everybody’s has had fantasies and masturbate with a couple pictures of their favorite movie stars, classmates, friends, random girls on facebook, etc… A grown man should know better about marrying a video game character.
A completely different hairstyle!? My god! However will we find him!?
well…the only way to tell two asians appart is by their hairstyle.
Too true!
He probably has the same hairstyle but the lack of glasses will change his appearance entirely just like it does for Clark Kent/Superman
yes, yes, we all know.
hahaha soo true
gah!. u dOnt say ‘asians’… -_-* .. hez japanese.. there are many other countries in asia.. n not evrywwhere do people look exactly alike….
Now we wait for the divorce
She is going to have his joystick in a vice and take him for all the internets he has.
I wonder where there honeymoon will be.
No honeymoon, a firewall is separating them
or is it her mother?
Wii firewall -> configure -> disable.
Ryannon, you just made my week
yeah, probably becouse the chick gets bored with ihm
Wasn’t SAL9000 a sister computer to HAL9000 from 2010?
yep. She had the pretty blue “eye” instead of HAL’s creepy / evil red one.
The only robot I can think of that had a blue eye also had a yellow, red, and purple one. And an obsession with cake. the cake is a lie.
The cake was not a lie. Did I not say “You will be baked, and then there will be cake?” And I do not have an obsession, thank you very much.
You have to watch out for the brown eye computer
he’s actually superman
I lol’d
not really even a fail…this is probably some kind of weird viral promotion for the company that made the game.
You know all Asians aren’t like that.
It’s like saying all whites are stupid because their racist.
I’m white and I don’t have my own racist.
I am white! I demand a racist.
Me too – I demand my own racist!
I got my first racist action figure at the age of 10… But she married another guy
But now that I’m all grown up, I’m waiting to get my racist license and pop says he’ll get me a real racist!
than that means you are not stupid
Your knot stupid either.. Are ewe?
You’re* not* we* tsk tsk Fail on your spelling.
Ever heard of sarcasm? Or were you being sarcastic to his sarcasm? I’m confused! O__O
I am glad im irish not white
I’m Irish too, just black from the waist down. X_x
Everybody is racist… except me, of course.
racist…
Me neither. I hate everybody
how are you not racist
If you hate everyone nobody gets left out! : D SHARING IS CARING U GAIS.
Right, how long have you been on fail blog? You speak as if you’ve completely missed the literally 100′s of other pictures from non-Asian cultures of “idiotic things” in the media.
Self-criticism fail.
the whole “death sentence” thing’s a little rough, dont cha think? id settle for an annulment
And for that matter, why won’t asian guys go out with cute REAL white girls like me!
lol
This is some how equivocal,
Are you the asian guy or the (cute) real white girl?
yes in 2012
Dont worry, it will never happen.
this is old …
I am not that aged I will have you know.
You are only as young as you feel.
I know!
(but this morning there is a dichotomy- my brain feels about 10, my body feels in it’s 70′s)
*feels k@*
You feel wet and sticky. What’s that in dog years?
Under 100, after that it turns to dust.
Correction! You’re only as young as the man you feel.
My man is 20 years my senior. I do hope that’s not true!
Ladies, we need ourselves some toyboys!
Plush or action figure?
I always had a thing for action man…
I’d like a plush one please. Action Man has too many hard angles, all in the wrong place.
Action Man would be like being topped by a wardrobe with the key still in…
I want an action man with the kung fu grip.
But if you get a action figure, you could be immortal!
*shaves beard*
*waxes chest*
*jumps on skateboard*
Wazzup?
oooooooooohhhh
*wonders if this toy is remote controlled*
*shrugs*
*tries to check if toy is anatomically correct*
*Looks over k@ shoulder*
I don’t like Ken dolls.
Me neither
and I usually find plastic underwear fun and interesting!
The pubic hair plugs give me the willies.
Too pointy and rough.
And if dolls aren’t your thing, I hear Nintendo has a pretty neat selection of boys. You could get one there.
no “first!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111111!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!one!!!!!!!!!!”?
O.k…When i show santa clauss fcking a reindeer i was sure i ‘ve seen em all…Now THAT’S A Notable FAIL
dude. babe.
hahahahah
third
how did she end up with him?
I don’t know but when he prints her out and takes her on honeymoon, he’d better guard against paper cuts.
-Rubber gloves?
Do you suppose they’ll fly? He’ll have to switch her off during take off and landing. I imagine most husbands wish they had that power.
Do you suppose they’ll fly? He’ll have to switch her off during take off and landing.
I guess most husbands wish they had that power.
(that better FB? guess? bloody moderations)
Oh my. He can turn her on at will? wow. She’s one lucky gal
(hugs for the newcomer? pls? *puppyeyes*)
There are no hugs on FB.
Sit quietly and behave and you might get a *squeeze* from one of these guys.
*is sitting quietly and is being have*
#1 Never reply to a moderated comment.
#2 *squeeze* if you want to go faster
#3 Safety
#4 ???
#5 Profit
*borked*
#6 Get an avatar
Kkz – I’m on it
You should also notice which finger is the girl pointing at you with.
That’s not her finger and she is not a girl. You need new glasses.
Ohai
lul
*robotic vicegrip squeeze* ^_^
Maybe he could print her onto sugar paper. I’m sure she’d like being eaten.
Rice paper? Everyone enjoys licking a bit of rice paper.
Print her onto money- bingo she is a ho.
Print her on to litmus paper and see if he ends up with an acid tongue.
Print her onto loo paper and, oh, no, wait! Bluergh.
He shouldn’t print her on anything over 120gsm or she’ll end up thick.
And she may get carded in bars.
Still, no matter how thick, she’ll only ever be able to bend over 7 times.
I guess they won’t be playing “twister” any time soon.
Comment awaiting moderation! Why!? What’s not allowed to be said?
Are you !magining many things?
No I didn’t. And my original reply to you is also awaiting moderation.
I now have three comments under this fail that have upset FB. And I have no idea why…
Who didn’t feed the blogmonster?
Is there a convenient place with a list of all the naughty words? If not, there should be.
I get moderated without saying anything naughty. Seems to be either random, or just…failing.
Still, despite how thick, he’ll only ever be able to bend her over seven times.
But if he prints her onto photo paper, he’ll have some lasting memories of those good times.
On origami paper, at least she could be 3D
Would that be considered ass to mouth?
Errr… If you put your loo paper in your mouth once you’ve used it then yeah, sure mate.
No that makes her the Queen. (BTW on a similar note. British Comedian takes part in the Royal Variety Perfomance in front of the Queen. After his stint he turns to the Royal Box, sees the Queen and is supposed to have said “Oh. That reminds me. I need to buy a stamp”
QI
I may have forgotten how to right a sentience!
Try putting all your verbs in the beginning.
I forgotten how to left one.
maybe they had a double-date picknick
Haha Crazy Japanese xD !!!
*draws twin ninja-tos*
BF, should I do the honors or do you want to settle this personally?
**Mouth out of synch with speech**
You want to fight!! Then fight me!! AIIIIIEEEEE!!!
*ground shakes and rocks float up off the ground*
Old.
Yeah, posted everywhere on November 24, 2009. Definitely pulled from the archives.
Haha that told him
You’re so behind the times old man.
lol you actually know the date?
I Googled “Man Marries Video Game Girlfriend” and all the links had the same dates. It took a whole ten seconds.
they must have awesome sex
If he prints her out on a napkin, he doesn´t even have to clean the mess afterwards
If he prints her on Puffs with Aloe, he won’t need the lotion either.
If he prints her on wallpaper, he can have her against the wall.
If he prints her on flypaper he will get a buzz from the sex.
awesome! wait for news of his dick getting stuck in the DS.
Probably in the slot meant for the Gameboy Cartridge
He’s not good enough for you!
And what can you offer her?
an adult-size dick?
sauce?
So… Where are they going for their honeymoon again?
I’m terribly sorry, but you appear to be on my name.
Would you require a crowbar to exact an eviction atall?
If you have one handy, m’dear, it would be most appreciated.
*hands over crowbar decorated with tinsel*
Ooh! Tinsel!
*gets distracted by sparkles*
…What was I doing?
Erm….not sure
Look at the shineey
*eyes glaze over*
Sorry!! You’ve ALL been evicted from this joke. You have 24 hours to pack up your belongings and leave. This joke will now be demolished to make way for a Multi Storey Car Park.
ooh! ooh! can I use my super cool +5 adamantine greatsword with dragonsbane core, diamond hilt, and ranged-blade capabilities? please? please? PLEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAASE??
nom nom nom
this even reached danish newspapers. japanese otaku news never reach denmark.
But but but… you just said it did. Make your mind up! :p
Thank goodness he didn’t marry a man or else he would have ruined the sanctity of marriage. >_>
ok, that one made me laugh so hard I teared up
Does this mean my childhood dream of marrying Aladdin might finally be realised?
Oooh! ooh! Dibs on Lucky Luke!
You want a dude who shoots faster than his own shadow?
hey, i want a virtual wife too!
and a longbow. then we can go and kill the dragons.
and maybe, just maybe, she’ll be a ranger, to go with my class… or maybe a druidess… or maybe a…
Marrying a video game character… the more I think about it, Link (Legend of Zelda) may just be the perfect man…
Nice to look at, brave, will go through Hell to save his princess, and of course, he never talks back…
Just a bad thing he loves to chase chickens…
Well, Zelda’s definitely bored, I mean, the guy’s a cock chaser! (Too soon?)
What if I want to marry Aladdin? Can we all marry him?
Post a link!!
It’s not as good as the real thing. But, probably not as bad, either. ;P
live long and prosper.
what a douche
ROFL just a random otaku lulz
aw i think this is sweet in a twisted kind of way. maybe now i can marry Cloud Strife, as i wanted to as a young teenager XD
errrr jusr realised how much of a fail my random avatar is… i honestly did not choose to have a PINK SWASTIKA as my pic hehe
You can not choose your generic avatar……it chooses you.
Spooky huh!
This must be Soviet Failblog. Eeep!
I have yet to see a generic sickle, I await it with baited breath!
.
On second thought…..*spits out worms* they just taste yucky.
I’d reelly like to think the rod would be spared from the sickle. Ouchie!
That would be angling for some injuries you would never recover from!
You’d be forever fishing for compliments to try and make you feel batter about your small portion.
Forever feeling you insufishinsea, sad.
**Starts Singing** We want to get out of this Plaice. If it it’s the last thing we ever do
I could always start speaking in a Cod American accent. Or try to get you hook, line and sinker.
In soviet russia blog fails you!
Im gunna buy it and root your wife
Hey, considering this supposed wedding was really a publicity stunt for the game, and the guy made quite a bit of money with the whole thing… is he really a loser, or quite the opposite, someone able to take advantage of the modern times?
You’ve got a point, I think…
That could be publicity for the game…
If so, it’s justifiable, if not, what a retard that guy xD
does he control her using a game-controller? Press ‘F1′ to get beer from kitchen and so on….
hehehehe
It looks like he’s using a Wii. He’ll have to do all the motions for himself. He may as well stay single.
her top half may be on screen but her bottom half is tattooed on his hand, you know what I’m saying! lol
lol la lol!
well she _is_ hot
one word; virgin.
I heard they were considering passing a law in Japan to let people marry fictional characters. I wonder what the fight would be like over Haruhi… xD
I believe he got the dream of every guy, a quite wife
No, some dream of a very wife.
I think this guy has an almost wife.
Practically anyway.
I wonder if she has a sister? I think I need to go shopping…
..and this little pig cried Wii Wii Wii, all the way home…
I’m more curious about “Puppet-controlled game”.
He looks like a girl anyway
Darwin would be proud.
ROFL yeah.
I know! How will he reproduce?
err… adoption?…
er… “My mom is a virtual character”?
Guys, to me, this isn’t a FAIL, this is just simply True Love :I
Let the man be, and marry who it wants, there shouldn’t be any limits to how much you love someone, real or not.
FAIL
That’s just stupid. In fact it’s so stupid that they haven’t invented a word to describe it for fear that it’s utterance would cause the brains of people who heard it to shut down spontaneously.
I am in fact dumber for having read it.
FAIL sir. FAIL.
Yeah! No one should be allowed to love in a way that others find weird!
*eyeroll*
Love = reciprocal affection
Game characters = not sentient
This may come as a shock to you, since I know you and Tifa from FFWhatever are in a longstanding monogamous relationship, but game characters are incapable of love. Because they’re not real.
Someone needs to take this boy aside and just slap the everloving shit out of him.
I nominate you!
I can understand his attraction however. She is giving a come hither look. But is it me or does “he” look severely feminine? I bet Sal9000 is a lesbian.
Well he does identify himself as a female computer…
Err…..It seems to me the man in the wedding looks like a girl.
Soon they’ll be having virtual babies next. Ah well, at least they can cut the power to the Wii when they act up.
*Insert mayonnaise into SD port when bitch squeals…*
I wonder how the babies will look like..
Why am i not suprised?
This guy looks like the male version of Ugly Betty.
So true!
Why buy when you can get the MILF for free?
I’d marry her too.
Poor dumbly stupid guy.
Maybe it’s just a thing about seeking “perfection” in one’s mind, but then he was pretty over the top by “marrying” her. Girls IRL aren’t perfect, but there’ll always be one you’ll like. So I think it’s one of the two things:
1- He was seeking for “perfection” and (obviously) have any luck with real chicks
2- It’s an advertisement of the game
hear hear!
i would do it! the full comment is way WAY up there ^
I wonder how he feels about his wife dating thousands of other guys like he doesn’t exist.
aaahhh japan…
when will you learn?
wait, if he gets to marry her, can i marry the doctor?
pls?*puppy eyes*
What will their kids look like?
just….dude
Look on the bright side: he can’t procreate this way.
As long as it’s a marriage between a MAN and a pretend, non-existent WOMAN. That’s traditional marriage! That’s way programmers designed it! It’s in our binary code! Think of the virtual children!
Spilled soda out of laughter.
Personally I think she’s too good for him =D.
I hope he got a prenuptial agreement.
well…… atleast hes asian
If they divorce, does Nintendo get half his stuff?
That’s not the girl he married.
Report FAIL.
Did you, sir, attend to his wedding or what?
She is so gonna cheat on him with me. Only kidding Princess Peach.
Think about it.. This man, married a video game female character with her look/personality/speech al set up by another man.
|D
Kinda fr00ty.
lol i accidentally clicked where it said “Watch ceremony”
you kids are retarded. this guy must have gone through so many rejections in life he fell in loved with this “game programed girl”. ever think about that or his feelings towards why he did this? please think before you say “OH HE’S A RETARD”. you can say that if you were in his shoes and experience what he went through.
So rejection is an excuse for irredeemable stupidity? (Assuming that this isn’t a publicity stunt.)
Assuming this isn’t, in fact, a publicity stunt, this man will now never reproduce another human being, and the traits that got him rejected so many times, and the traits that made him do something so amazingly stupid, will never return to the gene pool. So I wouldn’t complain if I were you.
There IS a thing called “hookers”.
This is incomplete. The Darwin article at the bottom should be circled and marked “WIN.”
Time for a good purging.
Well he is Chinese or something so that probably explains it all.
can i married with my pillow?
My little sister married our hamster.
she’s hot!
I wonder how the wedding went? Also how will the kids come out? Judging by the fact he’s asian, I predict he won’t have any trouble sticking it into the memory slot that’s about 2 mm wide.
I call Mai Shiranui.
wats the command key for sex? insert d, insert home, lol page down? can u toggle or do u keep holding down the key? always press f5 afterwards.
wow i sound like im giving free sex advice
just insert in the USB port
Well since Love Plus is a Nintendo DS game just use the stylus pen
would be a epic fail when they get a divorce
he’s actually not bad looking
(two hundred and) FIRST! I win.
how the hell would they have freaking kids o.o;
Virtual kids that you don’t spend money on.
If they have kids when they don’t want to they could use system restore to un-do it =D
Totally impossible! There is no way he can wed a virtual lady (unless she is what she is anyhow) – !
WAIT – She may not be who she really is, ain’t it? (It could be some fugitive disguised as a lady, right?)
You missed the point. It’s LITERALLY a virtual lady, you know? 100% software, 100% electronic lady, not a single human interference aside from programming her.
Oh cool! So there’s still hope for me XD XD XD
Hillarious… and quite tragic!
Try to go out and meet chicks. Unless you… PREFER that sort of thing
Look at the bright side! This could solve the overpopulation!
Also means more available single real life women. But I will admit at least she’s cute but of course otaku such as myself(not a hardcore otaku like him) can see that these girls are very kawaii but there is so many anime and virtual girls that are just too darn cute and how this guy can choose 1 out of like probably a billion cute anime style virtual girls is beyond me. But I guess it gives real life women competition. But with virtual girlfriends at least schools won’t be so crowded, no long waiting in line for places, and I don’t think virtual girls need real life food either(but then again most dating sim games can even have you go eat somewhere together with the girl. But if this character has a Japanese voice actress I wonder how she feels about this.
All I can feel about this is sad.
i think it’s cool.
really cool. but all the racist comments ruines it…
Anyone else think he looks like Ugly Betty?
~*KA*~
America Ferrera is actually pretty cute aside from the Ugly Betty role.
I remember seeing this
the epitome of autophobia *sings*” lonely, i am so lonely…
i have lost all faith in humanity at this point…
Don’t look down! It’s time to celebrate! People like him are not gonna reproduce!
that is the young asian jon elton?
wow that guys a complete retard….he must be living in his mothers basement if he marrys a VIDEO GAME CHARACTER! im no racist, but im just saying.
well, she is pretty
He should just use GameShark and get over 9000 mates in one push.
Only in japan.
What a loser. He should be saving up for a robot waifu, like a normal person.
I laughed out loud xD
you know she is just playing HIM!!!
the main character from that game’s gonna be pissed
Funny, I read about this before. I think it is called objectamasexual.
Wow. Just wow. If something like this can happen in Japan, why us US citizens have to deal with marriage bans? Gay marriage ban in California, interracial marriage in Louisiana, etc.
*plays that ol school Computer Love*
Then again, this is most likely fake anyways; seems like a publicity stunt since there’s no real marriage documents available (or is there?).
I agree. I think Gay marriage should be allowed. ESPECIALLY in a state like Cal.
Bwa ha ha
Nene better start learning the ways of Cooking Mama!
Wow, nobody mentioned yet how that guy looks like Austin Powers?
Not really o_O
I hope they don’t go to Vice City for their honeymoon.
LOOOOOSER
It’s totally because of guys like you he’s marrying her o_O
good for you, you retarded failer
Lol a confirmed publicity stunt XD
anyone who doesn’t actually think this is some sort of The Onion-esque parody from the first minute is fail :/
Then again, the bait for anyone to loudly proclaim “I’ve lost faith in humanity” is too great
really???? wat a fukin looser
Somewhere, a virtual mother-in-law is weeping.
i’d like to punch that guy in the face after i break his game console
And that’s gonna help him, of course.
I was looking through the failblog website, then I started reading the comments on there. It’s like the same seven rednecks commenting on all of the pics, extremely ignorant stuff. “well…the only way to tell two asians appart is by their hairstyle.” and “Cuz soccer is the gayest sport around and they act like little biatches and flop any time they get touched or come close to getting touched.” It ruined the fun of looking at the pictures until I found this one: “I move that we sentence to death not only for doing, but also the saying of stupid things! Internet should be clear in no time” Failblog: It’s not funny anymore, it’s just sad
Double-fail, the article has a picture of the wrong character…
Yes that matters.
OMG WHAT A DOUCHE!
what willl the kid look like
Luigi
he looks like Jermaine Clement’s Asian equivalent
That’s no asian dude. That’s Ugly Betty…
only slightly less important to news about the president to the left
I wonder what their kids are going to look like 0_0
You know, he’s not that bad looking. And the anime character is pretty normal looking, for an anime character. He must be some incredibly horrible person.
Or: he’s not interested in dealing with an actual human being, rather a yes yes cartoon.
OR he could be rejected for being a nerd.
Wait…Does this mean I can marry Sephiroth?
On the plus side, he won’t be able to pass on his fail genes.
Not without cheating…
You know considering he couldn’t get one woman….
Hang on is that legal? It’s not like she can actually consent…..
actually it’s a visual novel type game apparently…. and in the game the chars can get married to your char…. soooooo yeah…………
i watched a yahoo report on it and apparently they went to that scene in the game and had the wedding in game and in real life….
so messed up X_x
atleast shes hot…
u guys are just stupid
whats the matter in that marriage?
suckers
look at your own life until talk about the others
‘Yuiichi’ sounds suspiciously Asian… Call me crazy, but I think that man may be Asian as well!
I think we found the culprit.
I wanna smash his console, watch him cry over it, and smash his face.
Why so violent? Of course it’s a stupid thing, but that’s not gonna solve anything.
so ronery
I would say ‘Probably not enough women left for him’, but this seems to be more ‘Japanese brand crazy’ (Now in convenient travel size!
).
he actually kissed his DS in the wedding :/
Now THAT’s something I didn’t need to know.
wow lucky guy…she’s cuute LOL
lol if only a man could put a usb on the end of your…. then maybe just maybe… sex would be possible lol
But if they can’t pay for electricity anymore, then the wife is gone.
you guys need a life!!
Frankly, this should be an OTAKU WIN. =))
hahahahaha only stupid people actuqlly take the time to read that grabage.
he can make babies he can put his dick in where the stylus goes in the DS