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Cheezburger Network Blog
That sucks!
*sucks*
*phucks*
*chucks*
*bucks*
Shucks!
Smucks
humps
camels
mammals
cannibals
lecter
Soylent Green
C-C-C-Combo breakerrrr
cannabis
i can tell u do not say random words randomly while discussing random topics *heavy sarcasm*.
It also blows.
Is Honey Straws Lou’s nickname for you?
I’d type the nickname, but the comment is sure to be moderated…
I see you favorite flavor displayed prominently but they spelled penis wrong.
Penis colitis? I’m recovering, but thanks for asking.
I’m with sauerkraut.
I think I will buy 15…
’bout 17
it shows
So those are cigarettes?
What are you talking about? I think it’s totally tubular.
Bells?
This is as good a place as any.
Something larger is needed for dipping in honey.
Sorry, busy morning, gotta run.
*sticky squeezes*
I think AA is just bragging about the size of his honey dipper.
There’s another meaning for honey dipper that has me rolling at your statement.
That’s not funny in the slightest.
Yeah, if I am thinking of the same thing I think we need help for the fact we know about it.
I wouldn’t call it bragging; you’ll spend hours with something the size of a straw and never get satisfactory results.
Methinks the Admiral may be referring to a certain Dragon Nobilis.
That would require a honey lake. Hmmm. Maybe she could spot one from the air.
1 Ahahahaha
2 Ahahahaha
3 Ahahahaha
1 Ahahahaha
2 Ahahahaha
3 SafetySafetySafety
*squeeze*
*facepalm*
Of course, sorry.
*squeeze*
4 ah, honeyhoney, you are my PROFIT!!!
*ghostiesqueezes*
I’m glad you’re back.
Same. Although you appear to have aged a bit in your absence. You’ve gone gray!
*spectralsqueeze*
*dials 3333*
*mellifluous honey-custard
posessionhugs to you and the above sweet graces and shades*Honey straws? Makes me think of sex for some reason.
Pron star?
♪ Pronstar where are you out tonight?
It’s dark and I think that I would give anything
For you to, ah, shine down on me
Horny straws?
What doesn’t?
I can’t help it, you do that to me.
I’ve been practicing. Sucking and blowing… you know.
I was wondering why you rarely comment anymore. You must be busy “practicing”.
She was raised not to talk with her mouth full.
That is a pretty good tip!
You can’t fill your mouth with just the tip.
That depends.
On the size of your mouth or the tip?
Yes.
or what comes out?
Gotta be hard learning to type fast with one hand.
Yes, I’m boning up for the oral exam.
Hopefully all you hard work will be rectified by a bump up in your position.
Oh Ry, everything makes you think of sex!
*innocent look*
um hmmm
At least they got the 16 for $5 right!
Can i have 100 for erm….let me count….1 $?
This is the final straw!
It broke the camel’s toe.
Did it break your camel’s back?
Did you draw the short straw?
Did you take a straw poll?
Did you have roll in the hay?
Did the straw ???
Did the straw-berry pop tart?
I thought Brittney was the pop-tart.
Andy Warhol was into pop art.
The Dandy Warhols made pop-rock.
Pop rocks make my mouth feel dandy.
your mother makes my mouth feel dandy
Actually your mlther makes her own mouth fell handy. o_0
Would you like to pull my short straw?
You’re usually clutching at your own straw but when you’ve done…
Your straw, my berry…
I wouldn’t, he has warts.
Was that intentional??? If not- magic!
I am a little bit backwards, don’t worry.
Genius.
Your berry, my goose?
*gooses Moomin*
Your goose, my bump.
(Internet monster keeps gobbling my comments!)
You bump, my in the night.
(Or was that the internet monster?)
I bump? You bump! We all bump together.
Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, it all went wrong.
Curse me for a palsy landlubber.
*storms off*
*bumps alone*
*sQUEEZe*
That squeeze made me queasy.
I always wondered how you managed with them short arms.
I have talented feet.
And a finglongerer.
ET finger longerer?
You ate it? But but but, you don’t know where it’s been!
Which is probably a good thing.
lol
Mmm, yes, quite so.
*nods vigorously*
Most deinitely.
*golf craps*
*casually slides ‘f’ into post*
*looks around steathily*
I saw that.
*squeeze*
*LGBsqueezy*
I didn’t see what you did there.
*shows Shadow the instant replay*
How about now?
*squeeze*
Ayup.
Pina Colada honey?
Tropical bees?
They spelled Penis Allotta wrong.
Jeez. Honey penises? When you girls say you want a guy who’s sweet, I didn’t realize you meant that quite so literally.
Typed by a man that apparently keeps his mouth closed when he is ummm well you know, doing that thing guys do when they don’t have a woman close by.
What? Watching football?
I resemble that remark. I happen to be a big football fan.
Ditto…
*squeezesfordabuttacow*
Is there an echo in here?
Here?
Nope…just hit the sweet spot, that’s all…
*LGBsqueezies*
*butterysqueezes*
Mornin’, Gracie!!!
*butterysqueezeforGracie*
So do you enjoy watching the game, or the bench?
Yes.
*squeeziejaydubbya*
*squeezeback* What happened to your spoon?
I only need it when there are trolls about, and for stirring up trouble on the blog when it’s slow…
They grow in allotments?
I never knew that.
In my fantasy they do
Is that like Homers’ land of chocolate?
Rys Land of ac0ckments?
Ry, didn’t you once have a clickie of a ball of penises, kinda looked like an Xmas ornament?
I thought that was a bouquet!
Gah, every comment is being moderated. You mean this one?
Ummmm, Ry?
Jess?
I was getting “awaiting moderation” on every comment after using a word about armor that rhymes with links and another word that rhymes with bits. So I used a different email address and the avatar is different.
So that’s not your evil twin, then?
Nope, it’s me and now I can post with my normal email address as long as I am logged in, not just using it on the comments.
… Do I have the pictures right that you’re both Betty and Veronica?
Jess! And the clickie for Veronica/Ry is what Avis and Fluffy were talking about.
♪If you like Penis Allotta, and getting caught in the rain.♫
so basically get 15 for $5 if you keep doing 3 for $1
or go for the 16 for $5 and get one free…
sneaky marketing I think.
huh?
talk nonsense once more and I’ll eat you…
You won’t be taken serious until you have a real avatar. Until then, I scoff at your failed attempts at intimidation.
I’ll scoff you down.
Bring it, you have tiny arms and no reach.
No good for playing a rusty trombone.
get in my belly!
You poke, you pay. Leave the money on the dresser on your way out.
*poke*
*tickle*
*tickle*
*giggle*
wish i could reach out and poke someone
damn these small arms!
*gives TR a stick with a rubber finger on the end*
Try this.
*squeezes TR’s leg*
Oh! You do have the ruler out today, don’t you?
That made me laugh
I, too, *snorked*.
i don’t think there’s something wrong with that either
Something wrong either with that I don’t think.
Either I don’t think, or something’s wrong with that.
I don’t think something’s wrong with that, either.
It’s either wrong to think, or I don’t that
i would so buy some of these…
if i had money and wasn’t a dinosaur
O, the woe and pain of circumstance…
Big head, little hands?
yea.
means i cant reach my mouth properly…
That’s why you need honey straws.
And next up on the product line, we have these beautiful vintage honey straws! Look at this simple, yet effective, tubular design, the beautiful golden color of the honey… For those of you of the more… Tyrannosaur-ic persuasion, this may quite possibly be all that you’ve been waiting for!
Need a little extra Christmas $$, Shadow?
I guess. Apparently enough to sell sweets to extinct, prehistoric wildlife.
Hey, you gotta be creative if you want to succeed in today’s economy, right?
sold!!
aTR, become one of us:
ht tp://failpeeps.wordpress.com/faqquity-faq-dont-talk-back/
*eyes glaze over*
Yes, one of us.
lolasaurusTried to do a clickie with a t-rex pic and it’s in moderation. So I found a different link to the same pic.
ht tp://www.imdb.com/media/rm773167104/tt0396555
I dunno. Personally, I like this one.
That would be an awesome avatar.
These are a couple of sweet looking avatars for TR, but has anybody dished the address to gravatar.com?
What the heck is a honey straw?
Googled, and eeewww.
I seriously can’t stand honey.
:[
*poke*
*play*
*squeeze*
*hug*
*tickles Jules’ Nerf balls*
*scritches all his favorite … erm … spots*
What is a scritch?
Will it hurt?
Nope, ranks up there with Marmite in my book. Blargh!
*cleans blarg*
*Eats all marmite so as not to cause offence*
… But Pa might not.
*Flees*
How about whip cream?
Whipped cream is the best!
Be careful with whip cream. It’s for indoor sports only. Trust me on this one.
*takes notes*
“Cops like whip cream covered girls.” Write that down.
*scribbles furiously*
“Always check for silent alarms when looking for a place to ’sample’ whip cream outside.” Write that down.
*turns page*
*continues writing*
You might want to check the area for anthills before doing any of that.
We were in the car.
Wait, what? I mean………………
*runs and hides in darkness*
*finishes notes*
Are we done? I’m getting writer’s cramp!
*passes Gracie a typewriter*
*skips up behind Gracie*
*steals ‘e’ from typewriter*
*skipsawaywithaquickness*
*looks at typewriter*
*checks notes*
*shrugs*
*puts whipped cream on typewriter*
*counts money*
Wow I have enough for a straw hat.
Just beware of the Big Bad Wolf.
Jinx!
Sphinx! (naughty Moomin!)
Minx! (Naughtier Mookie)
Blinks! (Let’s blame Lou and Jam!)
*winks* (It wasn’t me!)
Stinks. (Looks for ZA)
Sinks (where am I going?)
*Thinks*: Did anyone see my comment re the Raconteurs song “Intimate Secretary” sounding JUST like you guys, and making me smile whenever I hear it.
It’s the ultimate random rhyme-run.
*shrinks*
*backs away from the music*
*minx*
I know what to do with that honey.
*writhing in shame*
Missed the earlier minx.
*Links song*
Don’t be shy. You don’t have to like it.
But the lyrics!….
*drinks*
*dances uncoordinatedly*
Shucks- comment awaiting moderation.
In attempting to write the sound of two glasses meeting in a celebratory drinking fashion, I think I have been mistaken for a racist.
:S
It said:
*ch!nks*
Cheers!
*enjoys a bump and grind with Moomin*
*inks*
*draws a moustache on Moomin*
*rides the drawn mustache*
You’ll get ink on your hooha that way, Ry. Try it the other way…
No no no, you haven’t seen his bike.
ht tp://failblog.org/2009/07/16/handlebar-grips-fail/
I built a house out of these.
But then a wolf came along and blew me and it all just got sticky.
What did the wolf do to your stones?
The wolf, that little puff, he got in a huff.
Puff the magic dragon,
Lived on a shelf,
He had nobody to play with,
So he played with himself.
Blow the magic dragon?
That’s acid-nine.
Mmmm sticky moomins.
Ry! FPs are not food!
*boopanose*
Don’t worry – she knows not to use her teeth.
No fun
*nibbles Moomin*
*using teeth for fun*
Owl face!
What? He’s marshmallowy and delicious.
*licks LGB’s arm*
What? I thought you were used to it.
Did it taste like bubble gum?
Should it?
My daughter think so.
That seems to be the general opinion.
You don’t get it. The first options are the diet choices. In the first case, you get 1/3 of the calories for the same price. Or the half, in the second one.
Oh, I get it all right. I get it.
Math fail.
Honey straws are the greatest things ever!
Mango, Strawberry and Blueberry are my favorites. I could eat a hundred of those things. ^^
By my reckoning, the shop owes you $5 then.
… and some bonbon joviality tix
Oh, Happy candy.
Yay!
Wait a minute- This has hair in it.
there's bound to be H1 in every N1*carries away the copy*
My original got ruined. You can keep the paste, I don’t digest it well.
*eats paste*
*hands K@ glitter*
It’s the holidays. Why not eat the glitter and then you can poop out your own holiday ornaments?
But it tastes funny.
*spits glitter in bukkit*
*hides in cupboard*
Maybe she doesn’t wanna be like gary glitter?
just sayin’.
*kicks ground* *hangs head* * mumbles into chest*
Sorry K@.
just wanted some pretties.
Stinky pretties?
*shudders*
now, there’s a visual. …
:ick:
:ick:
Sparkly, poopy ornaments. Why? Why?
Give the dog some tinsel…problem solved…
Blaaaarrrrggggghhhhh!
*brings in mop and bukkit to clean up all the BLAAARGH*
Don’t want somebody to slip in this stuff.
Here, let’s put all that into this special scrapple pan. …
Why would you want a intestinally flossed dog?
:ick:
Actually, I’ve seen a sign like this before… they actually sold 1,2, and 3 sticks for a dollar (they didn’t like to carry change).
1 or 3
it don’t matter to me.
I always wondered if people were dumb enough to just try to buy one at a time, when you can get three for the same price.
Yes, they are.
Waste not, want not.
Not sure how that applies, but my Granny said that a lot in these kind of situations.
They are everywhere.
Are they?
Psst! There’s one behind you!
*points*
*gasp!*
Where? Behind the mirror?!
Stupid people? EVERYWHERE!!!!
How much is that honey straw in the window
the one that really blows in price. …
Todays office quote:
“My computer, not the fried rice”
But I like the fried rice.
Meliaiphobia – fear of honey.
It’s not so much that I fear it, it’s just that I hate the stuff.
Agreed. Yuck. Not even with peanut butter.
Why would you put honey with peanut butter?
Why would you want honey with anything??
*groupsqueeze*
I love honeybutter.
How do I make the little evil guy smile?
Don’t want to appear angry when I’m just being rotten to the core.
Twisted, instead of evil.
Yes, I’m twisted, but did you really have to announce it to the whole blog?
Oh wait!! *palms forehead* Right. You were answering my question. *sigh* It’s going to be a long day.
: twisted :
Yum! Honeybutter on some fried dough! That is the only way I eat honey.
Ok, that I’ve had and actually like! It’s good on warm flour tortillas when you can then dip the tortilla in a sort of mesquite salsa.
There was a place back home that served that instead of rolls when you ordered.
Baklava has honey in it too, right? That’s quite nom as well.
*wishes fervently that we had a “barf” smiley*
Mr. Green would work, if we could turn his smile upside down.
Oops would work too, if he turned green instead of pink.
♪♫ If you chance to meet a frown,
Do not let it stay.
Quickly turn it upside down,
And smile that frown away! ♪♫
I knew someone would jump in with that!
*squeezyMsBeezy*
It’s a proven fact that it takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile. The number of muscles is up for debate (anywhere from 20/12 up to 50/30), but it only takes four muslces to reach out and smack somebody upside the head.
honey in tea makes for a sweeter me!
plus, I prefer it in coffee.
I grew up with my mom trying to feed me peanut butter and honey sammies. Everyone else seemed to like them, but me.
Spam™? Honey? You poor thing!
♪ oh, sugar sugar. ♫
*loves peanut butter & honey sammiches*
*likes to put cinnamon on them*
*gag*
Beats scrapple any day of the week.
Gracie, sweetie, we need to talk about these strange food tendencies of yours…
Let’s not. I’ll get hungry.
*passes peanutbutter & cinnamon honey sammie to Gracie*
*takes one for self*
nomnomnomnomnom.
mfts melshious!
*Would rather have one of those open faced, braised fig, manchego, and carmelized onion sandwhiches. With roasted red peppers. And maybe some roasted chicken.*
No figs……………..Sorry Avis. Could we try it with artichoke hearts instead? Different feel to the sammie, but it might work.
Wow, guys. Whatever happened to plain ol’ ham and cheese?
Eew. Ham and Cheese was my roommates nickname when we worked at a diner together. Are you asking me to eat my roommate?!! That’s just wrong.
That would be a different feel to the sandwich! But it might be good!
*considers*
If the artichoke hearts are braised in white wine, maybe with a little garlic. And if we change the cheese to a goat cheese. Yeah, that would be pretty good!
Never talk food with me if you’re the slightest bit hungry!
plain ol’ ham and cheese? I think it got bored and went home.
*stomach growls*
*tries to nom monitor*
Avis, if I wasn’t hungry, I probably wouldn’t be talking about food with you to begin with. Honey or no honey. There are other directions to take a tube of honey.
spam cheese is sure to please!
Thanky!
*squeezes BBB*
*noms sammich*
I also like PB, honey and pear, but the pear has to be ripe and juicy.
I like PB and pickles.
Don’t judge until you’ve tried it, I swore up and down that I wouldn’t like it. Then my wife got pregnant and wanted a PB and pickle sandwich. She made me take a bite. Next thing I knew, I was back in the kitchen making myself one.
I love those, but only dill pickles. I ate them before I got pregnant with my oldest, and grossed out the people I work with. It was funny! Still like them, but haven’t made one in a while. Hmmm. I think I need to buy some pickles.
:ick:
I had to sit next to a kid in elementary that had that for lunch almost every day. When it wasn’t pb and bananas.
My ex-hubby had a thing for peanut butter, jelly, and potato chip sandwiches. I’m not judging you JW. I’m judging him.
Gracie, did you use spears or chips? We actually prefer the “zesty” pickles.
BBB, Understood that I’m not the one being judged (this time). It is a bit harsh though to break up over dietary enjoyments.
Stackers. Doesn’t take as many as chips, and not as bulky as spears. Or I just slice my own, depending on how lazy I’m being.
Oh I don’t know JW. He and my friend were sampling each other. I figure that culinary chickanery qualified for drastic action.
That kind of culinary chickanery would normally mandate a little judicious trimming… waking up with certain body parts in a jar under your pillow would kind of clue you in to having been caught.
Now, now, Avis. Hate is a very strong word. It’s better if you use “dislike”, or “despise”, or “loathe to the point of wanting to murder”.
Hate with the passion of ten thousand burning suns.
Really, hate works just fine.
I hate it when people tell me not to say hate.
I prefer violently dislike…I like to make it colorful. Hate is too short of a word and doesn’t leave a lasting effect.
It does if you tattoo it onto a forehead.
*tries to picture ‘violently dislike’ written in scroll on punk’s forehead*
*can’t*
*decides ‘hate’ is better*
Maybe in Japaneese?
Who is turning japaneese??
A sticky situation to be in.
These straws suck sweetly rewards through a hole made of air.
… Yes.
▲
▲ ▲
I don’t understand…
You can give 1, 2 or 3 for the same price…
Indeed 16 candles cost 5 $
It will cost you less if you get them instead.
It’s quite simple, really. You can get up to 3 for $1.00, but that doesn’t mean you can get 1 for $0.33.
Dude honey straws rock!
lol, they have these at a farm a few miles away from my town. The ones they sell taste like a fat guy’s armpit. Ugh. 0.0
I am so not gonna ask you how you know what a fat guy’s armpits taste like… no, no… don’t wanna know!
Do English speakers think that Piña and Pina (colada) are the same word or you just don’t have an idea of how to write the ñ letter?
You know, N and Ñ are actually two different letters, not just the same letter with a non-important sign on top.
I dunno if all english speakers see them as being the same, kinda like you might see us as all the same.
Some people don’t know how to get the squiggly (I know that’s not the official name for it) above the “n”. It takes a lot of futzing around with spellchecker for my computer to do it.
Of course, they could just add it with a Sharpie.
I tried that. Now I have a permanent squiggly on my monitor.
alt + 164 = ñ and may your life be changed forever.
Unless you have a Mac. Then, I’m sorry for your fail.
Mac? voilà: ñ, Ñ. alt+n, n. or alt+n, shift+n. dont even need to be a leed unicode haxor, because we have intuitention…
Do non-English speakers think that informing and condescending are the same word, or you just don’t have an idea of how to come off as a non-douche?
You know, informing is when you actually care to educate others, not just putting us down for not knowing the non-important letter in a different language.
Ive shopped at this store. The sign is legit. The guy said he got thousands of honey stick as a good deal and was now sick of tight wad parents just buying one for a quarter when he had them at four for a dollar this way he gets paper money rather than loose change and rid of the stock before it goes bad.
“Me so Honey, want your Money.”
I don’t see the fail. Oh well. Those things are teh awesomesauce. xD The Renaissance Faire is the only place I’ve seen them though. :/
mmm copypasta
I want 3 but I only got enough money for 2.
Wow what the!
hur…
lol, modern strawfare 2!!
I dont see a fail either. They are trying to give you 3 for the same price as one. I see this all the time at firework stores, buy 1 get 2 free. I dont understand failblogs posts at all.
well wanna suck my straw for freee!!! or ill even pay you if i ca like you moms vag
epic title
It’s adobe photoship… I think
lol XD
No error here, 15 cost $5 so 16 is a real bargain. Better than Walmarts prices.
Yup.. i see No error in this topic.. “THIS BLOG ABSOLUTELY FAIL !!!!!”.. LOL
copy pasta has strange powers indeed.
nothing more to see here folks, move along..
wow that sucks
this is an epic win imho. a great marketing gimmick, even if done unintentionally.