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Just finished eating a raw chicken bread, no sweat. Looks like somebody owes me $20
You’re gonna die dude, salmonella for sure
I ate chicken, not salmon, dude.
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» 175 Failures in Communication
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Cheezburger Network Blog
that guy got owned and FIRST!
Lamebook is a regularly updated blog that re-posts funny stories from the social networking site Facebook. The site gets approximately 200,000 hits a day. Two Austin graphic designers launched the web site in April 2009 in response to the silly, vulgar and downright amusing content (as seen by submitters) of many Facebook pages.
Posts are organized in categories including Parents/Family, Personal Problems, Photos, Political/Religious, TypOHs! and WTFights.
Im sorry ’straight off lamebook.com’ you appear to have us mixed up with a site that give a crap.
$20 is a heck of a deal…Maybe he’ll get chickenella?
__
Here’s another, chicks swingset leap FAIL
That FAIL was awesome…and she’s cute!
who is the she you are referring to?
ummm, that to me sounds likes the desperate ramblings of an out of work graphic designer who’s realised his 2.2 is worth shit, and is trying to rake in some chump change from ad revenue.
People that stupid should be shot.
2st
Double fail right here.
twost isn’t a word …
Wouldn’t it be secost though?
*facepalm* Sounds like someone I work with.
familiar
Someone gonna bet 20$ that he dies?
I will take that bet, everybody dies at some stage
I don’t know. What would you call the undead like ZA?
A Failfriend who will never leave you. He might gnaw on you a little, but we’re working on that with him. Just keep repeating “we don’t eat failfriends, we don’t eat failfriends..”
*Nomnomnomnomnomnomnom
.
.
.
.
What?
Tell that to Lou…
He doesn’t swallow so it’s not really “eating.”
So your saying he just plays with his food?
He forks it.
*Cleans monitor*
Have you tried giving him smaller servings more often?
Chicken bread.
That’s what it says.
Hey now… that was not my finger you were just chewing on.
Okay, let me break this down for you.
If someone bets $20 that he dies, and you take the bet, you are betting that he will not die.
Good luck with that.
Salmonella is only a problem if the chickens are raised in inhumane conditions. Which applies to most of the chicken carcass you eat there in “civilised” society.
Go animal abuse!
Wow, that sporing.
(sorry bad pun)
“Humane” conditions? What, TV, a car, education etc.?
Nope, my mum got salmonella poisoning from eating a free range chicken the neighbour had reared in his back garden.
But most chickens are inoculated nowadays, so it’s highly unlikely this guy will die.
Salmonella doesn’t pick and choose which poultry product it wants to feast upon. It doesn’t go “hmm…I hate how they raised those chickens in an “inhumane” fashion, so I am only going to attack that kind of chicken”
Nope, Salmonella is present in all poultry. It does not discriminate between how the chicken was raised.
The bacteria is spread through the feces of animals that are infected. Free range chickens have as much ability to get it as normal chicken farming does. Free range chickens can easily walk through their own feces, pick at feed that is located in their own feces, so on and so forth.
However, chickens raised in stacks of cages are in a small area where the feces just builds up in one spot and are therefore more likely to contact salmonella contaminated feces. Free range chickens (done properly) have more room to run around so the feces is just a drop here and there, so they can avoid feces much easier. However, just because a package says the chicken is free range doesn’t necessarily mean the meat is any better. It could just mean the bird had access to a tiny, crowded, concrete run also covered in feces. The birds only have to have access to the outdoors to qualify as free range.
How do you properly do free range chickens? Do you follow along behind them with a pooper scooper?
Actually you have got it backwards. Free range chickens contract Salmonella more commonly than conventional chickens.
In 2005, researchers at the University of Maryland found that 76% of organic chickens and 74% of conventionally raised chickens available in retail stores contained Campylobacter. Salmonella was found in 61% of the organically raised chickens and 44% of the conventional birds.
Go safety measures to keep food consumption safe!
Are you assuming that “organic” and “free range” are synonymous? Because they’re not. Some poultry producers are both, but not most. Producing organic chicken eggs that are also free range makes them more cost-prohibitive than the average consumer can (or would want to) bear.
In description under pic: “Just finished eating a raw chicken bread” Bread? It says breast. Double fail!
On that note, raw chicken bread is quite the delicious treat one would have to admit.
♫ Chicken in a bread pan picken’ at dough. Granny does your dog bite? No child, no. ♫
that dog’s a f*cken liar!
He just likes to play your fiddle hard.
Makes you feel violinated.
Enough with the VIOLAnce!
*gets tired of all the sax and voilins in the world and hopes for peace*
Instead of harping on the issue we should organize and whip the violators into shape.
Viol(a) think there should be something more stringent.
You don’t have the (gat)guts to do anything about it.
*facepalms and corrects gatgut to catgut*
Cello’ver yourself! I can do anything if there’s lute involved.
Guys, guys…can’t we all just get along?
*hands out some flutes of champagne*
I wouldn’t want to make a lyre out of anybody, but if you really want to make a difference in somebody’s life just euphonium.
Okay Dragon, I’ll tonette down a bit.
Champagne? Does that mean we’re having a party? I hope so since I brought a tub-a ice cream to share.
Everyone above, take a bow!
Well, as much fun as this is, I really need to get some work done while I’m at work. I’ll be back basoon.
Thanks for clarinet up.
*pees*
Hey don’t get Volin, you hoped for it!
*Splash cymbal*
Hey! Watch where you’re going!
Oboey!
No, yu.
wow…
Give whirled peas a chance.
No cukes!
Chickenella- isn’t that a fairy tale?
I say I say I say BOY, I’m the only chickenfella around here.
Clucking hell!
On stage tonight, bending cutlery with the force of his mind alone
(and feathers like steel)
Chicken-Geller.
I I say say there boy, yes I am talking to you.
chicken geller! he’s my favourite bender!
You don’t like Futurama then?
I do, but those metal parts chafe me a bit
When Granny’s on a bender it’s meta(l)-physical.
*drops the soap*
*Kebabs*
*Keweaves*
*Kenits*
Kenock kenock!
*Kenuckles*
*passes granny the bacon lube* Here, this may help with the chaffing.
Salmonella is what you get when Vampirella bites you
That makes no sense.
This is a Failenella…
This was also on lamebook, again. FAIL.
Ok, obviously this has been SOMEWHERE at SOMETIME on the internet. What fails here is the lack of understanding of the blog. If you don’t understand how it works, STAY OFF THE BLOG!!!!
*takes a deep breath*
Sorry…I don’t know what came over me. Maybe it was the raw chicken I had for breakfast…
believe it or not, not everyone in the word is on lamebook, or even FACEBOOK for that matter. i only failblog.
so there?
You sure told him! But I would like to make a suggestion. If you are going to make a “so there” declaration, it usually holds more meaning if you have a neener neener behind it, stomp your feet and stick out you :Þ~~~~ and blow raspberries. I’m just sayin’…
yeah, what she said… just don’t pull her finger.
chicken sushi! *nomnomnom*
I saw that! What was that show?
*covers up* nothing to see here
You see me sashimi?
only when I use my California rolls
All this love is maki(n) me feel kinda nauseated. Then again, it could be that chicken sashimi.
*dirtygrannysqueeziegropes*
Wassab(i) with you? No food poissoning can keep me away!
Calamari(us), I’m sure He doesn’t want to be left out of the food fight.
You guys are soy crazy.
NO, R(I)eally?
Ayu guys having pun?
If you don’t like it, you can roe roe roe your sushi boat right on out of here.
Can I shoyu what hatahata fun I’m having?
Ahi(ear) what you’re saying. If you don’t want me to be hear I’ll just seaweed my way out.
*quickly steals ‘a’ and adds an ‘e’ to previous post*
Heer? Why would uni(d) to be 600 yards of wool?
There’s definitely something fishy about this.
Oh well then, please have this day old plate of nigiri. . .
*GINGERly squeezies k@*
Mmmmmmm, thats rice!
*smiles*
*gently passes out sideways*
*Places pillow under K@*
Seaweed like to keep her from getting hurt when she passes out.
Tastes like chicken smells like salmon.
Looks like liver.
bounces like a ball.
Oops name change.
feels like crap….oh wait, sorry continue
Once and a w(h)ile I get this great dirty one liners but I know that is your job so I don’t grannycf. Guud mornig sir.
oh please, I have no claim to ALL the dirt on this site, I also need inspiration between negative thoughts. Good morning!
All the dirties- no, the best and worst dirties…..definitely!
*squeeze*
gosh! thank you! *squeeze!*
This is straight of facebookfails .com
Get original failblog.
Sod of webworm.
And nothing of value was lost.
I’ll have what he’s having O_o
I’ve had salmonella. 20$ is definately a bad deal…
I’ll eat some raw salmon for $20, maybe even some raw tuna. I think I’ve eaten over $20 worth of raw salmon a time or two.
The REAL fail is by the person that stole this off of lamebook.com
No the REAL fail is your spelling of San Diego and how 1337 you think you are you big failing ninny poopoo pants. (sorry to all my beloved failbloggers for the harsh foul language)
This asshat obviously doesn’t get Fail Blog. I think it’s time to reintroduce the hot potato gun. Ry, bend him over and hold him down.
*laughs maniacally*
Who gets to do that potato thing? Shall I warm it up first?
Truely it’s Darwin’s theory in action.
How did you know their last name? It’s all blurred out. Are you some kind of ninja spy that can read even blurred out stuff? *backs away slowly*
Thinning the herd.
Filtering the gene pool.
*goes paddling*
*runsawaywithaquickness*
*piddles in the gene pool*
Is that a baby ruth?
I think I’m going to be sick to my stomach.
these face book fails were funny the first 475,244 times. After the next 924,866 times they were tedious. Now they are just stupid and boring.
Piss of then.
* kicks a lost “f” into Scott’s post *
Need some Lysol?
Really nice: FAILbook!!!!
Even if not Salmonella, the guy can still get Campylobacter infection from eating uncooked chicken.
This is fake.
The salmon reply is posted 6 minutes before the salmonella reply.
Them fish sure are fast, eh?
@vladimir: check your math. which was more recent? 53 minutes ago, or 59 minutes ago? you fail.
LOL – what do you have some kind of magic clock????? Ha ha – thank you the time traveler, say hello to your wife for me!!! Ha ha
You sure told him!
Thanks. I am surprised by some people on here and their trollin’ & hatin’. Peace to you Ryannon
not a fake, i’m the Cale from the conversation.
Fake
Vlad, you might want to turn yourself around, and retake a look at the picture. 59 minutes AGO was the first reply, 53 minutes AGO was the 2nd, meaning 6 minutes after, not before
Shhhh… it’s more fun when the obvious is not pointed out.
But then they never learn! How else will they know they fail at life?
Fail blog fail, “chicken bread?” No, “chicken breast.”
Diarrhea for $20… no thanks.
Would you take it for $15? Who sets the price on diarrhea anyway? Is there a board that polices the prices like on other commodities?
Ugh, not another fake facebook FAIL?!
/facepalm
Caption Fail – he ate a chicken “breast” not a chicken “bread”.
holy shit i thought all the idiots were in youtube.
Facebook fails enough on its own.
aw, STFU about facebook, it’s not the point of the matter, your mean’t to be taking the piss out of him and making him look silly, because he ate raw chicken breast.
Chick BREAD? DOUBLE FAIL!!!
FAILblog FAILS…it’s “breast”, not “bread”.
Winner, winner, chicken dinner!!!
The real fail here is that he risked his life/wellbeing for $20 bucks.
http://fakebookquotes.appspot.com/
Failblog fail?
eeeeexactly
HAHHAHAHAHHA XD FAILBOY
I guess lime disease is caused by limes
Okay, did i miss something or has no one noticed that the caption says “Just finished eating a raw chicken bread” not Breast?
Real caption: “How Avian Flu jumped the gap to humans.”
It’s cute how they cropped the picture right above the Lamebook watermark.
http://www.lamebook.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/lameonella.jpg
Sounds like someone’s in for a Darwin Award nomination.
Failblog fail:
the picture/screen cap says ‘chicken BREAST’
failblog caption says: ‘chicken bread’
FAIL
failblog fail, the guy wrote chicken breast, not bread
oops