The eternal question
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Well, at least no one will be offended by this one…
My parakeet would beg to differ…
no sh!t..
I beg to disinther.
Why my comment button won’t reply.
looks like apple needs to make their products better so people stop doing google searches on how to fix them
LOL tried to search ”why won’t” and it said that! =P
http://www.google.com/trends
^Google Trends win. Look at #1.
This is becoming an internet meme… Gross!
vincent jackson?
Spoken like a true Microsoft slave.
“Slave” these days implies that said person is unwilling.
Microsoft is a billion times better than Apple, and you know it.
and yet Linux beats microsoft to death with a spoon
^sings^ LINUX RULES!
Agreed.
I am not sure George Michael singing the theme tune is going to improve the popularity though.
no it is not, people misuse their ipods
If as many people bought Zunes as ipods im sure it’d be an even google battle.
sorry to say but microsoft sucks… even pc world says soxD
No, just diarrhea.
If not diarrhea, what does a Parak-eat?
seeds
and weed?
You feed.
Have a pint of mead.
I won’t dissagree
swimming in the black sea.
with steve?
Roaming free…
♪ Born free… ♪
I have to pee.
lick my knee
please
OH MY GOD THAT WAS HORRIBLE!!!
How ’bout a peanut butter sandwich?
They may be disgusted, but not really offended.
I’m offended. I believe in the health of parakeets…oh forget it…
I wanna know what a keet is, and how you can get a para them when I can’t even find one.
Gotta know the right people.
KEET is a digital-only public television station in Eureka, California, broadcasting locally on channel 11 as a PBS member station. Founded in 1969, the station is owned by Redwood Empire Public Television, Inc. It was originally on analog channel 13 until the DTV conversion on February 17, 2009
we care?
Cool story Bro..
♫ Oh, I used to be disgusted
And now I try to be amused…♫
You are a muse AA!
Now I’m stuck down amoung the wines and spirits.
im offeneded tht a parakeet wont eat my diarrhia
They will be offended by my comment, no less.
I take it there’s a lot of idiots who desperately try to listen to music eh?
I’m horribly offended by your comment!
GO ON GOOGLE AND TYPE IN “WHAT ARE”! NOW THAT IS A FAIL!
Type “but “, 7th down.
Odd place to store strawberries. I’m sure their significant other may have some fun retrieving them, though!
I am speachless…
type why, that’s a real fail
My parakeet eats my diarrhea….
wait… just look at the fifth one! lol
except for the amputees that god won’t heal…why won’t he???!!!!
For the same reason why the bogeyman and Santa Clause won’t heal amputees.
Did they try putting in the little sipper bottle feeders?
No, no. Try a bowl with some whole seeds in it first.
Does it help to swirl the seeds around first?
How about peanuts? There are always peanuts in a turd!
Even if you haven’t eaten any.
* puts down tuna sammich *
Definitely not meal time conversation.
Sunflower seeds, people! Add sunflower seeds.
Sorry, sauer.
Challenge: Write a Country/Western song using this as the title.
What style country/western? There are a few to chose from. Hank Williams style? Or maybe Garth Brooks?
Gee, I dunno. OK, I’m guessing the Hank Williams (older) style would be funnier.
I’ll start:
Why won’t my parakeet eat my diarrhea
Why won’t my dog roll in my poo
Why oh why have you left me
My toilet is so full without you
I thought your toilet was still fully of jelly beans…
Is that the color of swirlies?
Fluffy, I thought it was great!
Woot, fluffy!!
Fluffy Brooks no argument!
*Applauds*
*snorkroffle*
*pounceandsqueeze*
*happylatebirthdaysqueeze*
*missedgraciesqueezes*
Sorry about the buttery mess…here’s a ShamWow™…
Aww, a little butter never hurts!
*slipperybutterysqueezes*
*does Paula Deen voice*
Ev’rythins better with butter!
(fail blog is better with suzieQ)
You can never have too much… butter!
Awww, shucks…
The Joey Ramone style.
♪ Kick the birdcage, slam the floor
Drink, drink, drink, drink some more
I can’t think
Hey! What’s in this drink?
It feels like somebody put something
Somebody put something in my drink ♪
- Only needed to change one word.
Which one?
drink
changed ‘jukebox’ to ‘birdcage’
and the award for most inconspicuous joke of the day goes to (drumroll)
MRN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please take a bow
Woody or Arlo Gutrhie style. folk.
*gets Alice’s Restaurant earworm*
(clickie is youtube – not the version i was looking for)
*bukkit*
Guthrie!
Perfect song to accompany the turducken, Thanksgiving theme and all.
Boycotted… this goes nowhere good. Probably funny, but not this close to any meal time.
Well, it’s always mealtime somewhere (Was that a Jimmy Buffet song?)
Not 5 o’clock here yet.
Time is meaningless in the virtual continuum.
Mojitos anyone?
Or maybe Mudslides would be more appropriate…..
Ewww!
Please and thank you!
I’ll assume you mean the mojito!
*squeeze*
eep! this is still skwirrlgrrl….
I’m experimenting on Gravatar…. signed into WP and it pulled up my old ICHC christmas avatar!
Guess I’ll have to sign out, cuz it doesn’t give me the option to change my user name when I’m signed in….. pfft, and this is why I’ve put this off!
*giggles*
Avatars can be funny things sometimes. One day they are fine, the next day they won’t eat your diarrhea.
I like it, skwirrly! Looks great! Keep it! A little holiday cheer all year ’round!
thx!
I kinda like it too… but it makes my name wrong, and not only that, when I’m signed into WP it won’t let me play with my name at all!
*pout*
Not even the visible name? You can usually play with that and add to it… Interesting problems. I can’t even see avatars at all anymore. But I think that has more to do with the computer I’m on.
*specialawwwwsqueezeforskwirrlgirlandherboo-boolip*
Better be careful … a little birdie’s gonna come poop on there!
Um, what?
um, Avis… what are you doing up there??
not enough corn
ZING!
nutty?
♫ Burn, pain, burn, pain . . . ♫
Maybe because it doesnt want to?
Is it pining for the fjords?
It is…
This is the eternal question???
Doesn’t fit with the answer “42″, does it?
Ah, yes. 42. The eternal answer!
yessss. The answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything.
No, the answer to ‘what do you get if you multiply six by nine’.
The problem being, you never really knew what the question was.
hence the earth.. (mk2)
Shmee! Nice to see you again! *squeeze*
I turned 42 last summer. My husband and daughter never miss the chance to ask me how old I am, so that I can answer with an English accent.
How old are you, LGB?
*wants to hear accent*
“Fawty-too.”
I think you need to check your math…
He uses the metric system.
Math is a matter of opinion.
The math is a lie.
that’s cake.
The cake is a lie
No, the lamp is a lie.
Supposedly the ladder is, too.
nope, The Sofa did it! He lied to the lamp, who then told the lie to math who knew it was a lie! So BLAME THE SOFA!!
Moomin the answer to ‘what do you get if you multiply six by nine’ is still 42 as long as you take 12 from it
I went to Google and got the same result as the OP. It made me laugh.
Okay, who else did this? Raise your hand…be honest, now.
Admit your sin and it is a win!
I did.
Also tried the ‘what are’ suggested above.
I did. I also went ahead tried finding new ones. I uploaded them to autocompleteme but so far the only one that qualified was “who wants a CHEAP RINOCEROUS” (sry, I can’t bold)
Of course!
why will the world end in 2012
but not a wooden pencil
why will gram positive cells more than 24 hours old stain gram negative
why will a magnet attract an ordinary nail or paper clip
why will the earth end in 2012
why will obligate anaerobes grow in thioglycolate
why will my ipod not sync
why william peterson left csi
why will we die in 2012
why william is called bill
why will a carrot slice when placed in tap water for several hours become very stiff
why are there so many ipod questions in the fail?
No, I don’t see that one when I try it. Kind of a meta-question, isn’t it?
Do you get more wet running through the rain or walking?
Running. However, the faster you drive through the rain, the less water will fall into the car (assuming it’s a convertible).
Both were tested on Mythbusters.
As well as if your car uses less gas if you cool the interior with the A/C vs. the windows open.
AND?!?!?! I need to know!
Need INPUT!!!!!
Open the window!
More of a meta-bolism question.
Probably because of the way google works now, or at least it still does this for me.
When you type in a search it saves it incase you search it again, clearly this individual was having itunes/ipod issues…. probably because Limewire hates itunes. xD
Google Why is…3rd down…fail or win?
Forget the parakeet, look at all the iPod/Apple questions. Seems like things don’t “Just Work” in the real world.
Anyone remember the other google search fail? Type in “I am” and receive “I am extremely terrified of chinese people”. That’s still up there too! LMAO!
Am I the only one who tried this…putting it in the search bar, I mean. It’s true (the search bar part again, not the act…as far as I know).
You’re at least the third person to try it…
..hope this helps you ;-P
I tried it and got different results. I got “why is there a dead pakistani on my couch?” and “why is my poop green?” I can’t answer the first one but I’m betting on consumption of black frosting on the second.
Why would it be green then?
Blue food coloring does the same. I don’t know why, but trust me it does.
I was thinking licorice. … and a nice greek apertif.
Isn’t it having too much iron in your diet?
Am I not a man of steel?
Grape juice. Doesn’t matter if it’s white grape juice or purple. Don’t ask me how I know.
Hee hee! See my post ↓
Hee! Purple Kool-Aid does it, too.
Gross story warning!
When my son was younger he drank so much juice that in order to cut back on his empty calories I switched him to crystal light. We got the grape kind, gross in itself, and it literally turned his poop green. Now, not the kind of green you would think, it was like leprechaun green. My sister, who was babysitting, had to take a pic to make sure that she showed me the kind of green it was. It was really bizarre.
Now you can all join me in the failblog diet. You’re welcome.
We have a sister that photographs feces?
My sister and I once did that, except that it was bear poop, and it was on my front porch… does that count?
How did you know it was from a bear? I thought they did that in the woods.
Bears around me use soft toilet paper.
I hope they use Charmin otherwise they will have pieces stuck to their bear asses.
Does a bear sh¡t on the front porch? Naw, not catchy.
♪ Does your bear shit on the front porch while you’re sleepin’ through the night?? ♪
*taps feet and snaps fingers along with the music*
Some people like poptart, some people like poopart.
The Sensation exhibit?
POLY WANT SOME CRACK?
…ers?
jack!
off!
Him off!
Jinx!
Why do I keep doing that wrong?
Ha ha!
You did it wrong it doesn’t count! Nyah nyah-na-na-nyah!!!
Judy, Judy, Judy!!!!!!
*happyhumpdaysqueezies*
*returnshappyhumpdaysqueeziestodabuddacow*
Yay for working for the state government, I’m comfortably at home today and don’t have to work.
Yep, a good friend of mine works for the Nat. Guard, so she has today off and is spending it at the spa (her birthday was yesterday).
Speaking of birthday, how was your birthday, Ms B?
It was good, thanks!
See, I knew you couldn’t keep up your anti-birthday stance with us around!
*squeezies*
It’s not that I’m anti-birthday, it’s just that to me, it’s just another day. I guess I get embarrassed with all the extra attention.
Which is weird, because I can be quite the attention whore when I want to.
Preaching to the choir, sista!
*squeezesallaround*
Ditto!
Well, you’ve all got my attention!
*group squeezies*
Woohoo! It’s working!
*preens*
It’s a joke… ofc…
Answer: Because only caka-toos eat will eat it.
caca-poos?
caca-doos.
Thanks, now I have a dumb joke to tell the little kids in my family.
Yes, but will they eat it?
TBH I thought the god healing amputees line was even more fail !!
Troll Bashing Halibut?
Time Between Humping?
Terrific Being Here!
Toss-Back Herradura?
But why won’t god heal amputees??? I really wish to know!
The answer is simple: god is imaginary and, therefore, is unable to heal them.
Answer: Because God is a fictional character! You’re better off asking Harry Potter for help. HAHAHAHAHAHA
I bet it just a google easter-egg some programer enter to mess with people.
*borrows Jules’ Nerf balls*
Practicing my juggling act. I’ll get them back to you soon…
*giggles*
* crosses legs *
Yeah, I do need a third. Juggling two is just too easy.
*looks around*
Go ahead, they are there for everyone to use.
I’m really glad you added them, Jules. It gives us something to do when we’re bored.
Are you done juggling them yet, Judy? I wanted to play a little tennis.
Lets play dodge ball with them!
I want to try the search to see if it’s a hoax but I’m afraid it’s NSFW.
No guts, no glory!
Asking god why he wont heal amputees is also lol.
Yup, just checked Google:
It’s real and it’s fantastic
There is also “why won’t my diarrhea eat my parakeet.”
Too many people with more time on their hands than the average person.
you think?
I try not to. It hurts too much…
…and fills up the room with smoke.
Smmmoookin!!!!!
*squeeze*
I’m gonna leaf this one alone (again).
Failblog diet is at work again today. :ick:
No calories were consumed as a result of this fail.
*humdaysqueeziesfordabuttacow*
I love Hum day!
*Hums a merry tune*
*SqueezesSuzieQandLGB*
As opposed to Whistle Wednesday…
*squeezeforGS*
Tried Whittle Wednesday, but kept getting splinters.
*LGBsqueezies*
Ooooo! I dint see that until you pointed that out!
Humday. I like it!
*specialhumdaysqueezesforGS*
because it runs down your leg like a soft-boiled egg
Isn’t that a line from the “Do your ears hang low” song?
♫ When it runs down your leg
Like a soft-boiled egg,
That’s amorphous. ♫
Genius! Brilliant!
*Snickers*
*Milky Way*
*Baby Ruth*
Theres 2 fails in there, “why wont god heal amputees??”
I was hoping for “Why do fools fall in love?”
Because fools rush in.
We’re the happiest fools baby.
Are you the fool on the hill?
We’re all fools!
The Mob Rules!
Nobody puts baby in the corner!
Where angels fear to tread…
When I typed “Why wont” in google I did not get “Why won’t my parakeet eat my diarrhea”. Instead I got “Why wont my parrot eat my diearrhea” but further down the suggestion list (first was “Why wont God heal amputees, hehe). On the other hand, when I wrote “Why won’t” instead of “Why wont” I got the *right* one
“Ah.”
Ahh… the google of wonders, go stfu-plz googlewonder
Why won’t god heal amputees ?! xD
If you start typing wha in google, you will get a very good question about strawberries and nipples…I see Granny has been googling a lot again.
*snork*
That’s. Just. Awesome!
Suddenly I’m hungry for fruit salad.
♪ Fruit salad!
Yummy yummy! ♫
*raspberry*
reminded of line from musical Wicked
What’s in the punch?
Melon’s and berry’s and pears, oh my.
This made me think of a thread from above.
Pregnant woman + Grape juice = Green child.
stop spamming
Ooooo, strawberries and nipples. Add some nuts and I am in heaven!
How about a bit of cream?
Here, Suzie, Suzie, Suzie…
Why are so many people stuck on that one question?
It is a sticky situation.
Maybe it is a department at Google where they just sit around and think of questions that people may be too embarrassed to ask their friends but aren’t afraid to Google?
Bjorn: Okay, I got one. Why won’t my parakeet eat my diarrhea?
Sven: Das a good one.
That wasn’t the question I was referring to.
But one does have to wonder if there are people who just sit around thinking of random things to ask Google.
What would you like to ask Google, Avis?
I wouldn’t. I just prefer to wonder.
*squeeze*
Judy has a direct line to Sven and Bjorn.
They have been most helpful in certain areas of my life…
Lesson of the day with Sven and Bjorn.
1. Google toolbar is wonderful, quick and easy.
2. If you are going to Google an embarrassing word in said toolbar to verify the spelling before sending an email about it, make sure you clear out the word from the toolbar when you are done.
3. If you forget to clear out the toolbar, do NOT under any circumstances capture a screenshot of your web browser later in the day and attach it to an email that will go to your co-workers.
4. If you, for some reason, do not follow step 3, blame it on your child’s health class project and him/her using your computer to do research.
Once upon a time, I wrote a blog post about Michael Phelps… then I started getting hits for Michael Phelps searches, including the question “what color are Michael Phelps’ pubic hairs.”
Too many people with too much time on their hands. * clickie to the tune *
What color are Michael Phelps’ pubic hairs? Did you find out?
The other suggestions show the IQ of the average iPod owner.
Parakeets are tough birds, they don’t eat sh!t.
The water is not deep enough.
It’s just not that into you.
You have overlooked a key issue.
No donation, no salvation.
Go see the running of the ipods.
They have nothing in common.
You must touch without touching.
Stop trying to add a twist to protocol.
It’s open, try the back door.
*golf craps*
*joins Gracie in golf crapping*
I hope you can find a bird to eat that.
*snork*
Nice one, jam!
*Twitters*
Please no golf crapping stories.
Just avoid the back nine…
Let’s just say that the windmill will never be the same.
Not gonna happen.
Never?
Hee, birds give more than they receive.
hehehe Yup!
Just ask Moomin!
*flees*
*Collars*
Squeeze*
*cuffs*
*squeeze*
That. was. brilliant!
FAKE
This isn’t fake. There are many of these that are hilarious.
You don’t say, Dano!
Wow! For realsies?
There are websites dedicated to these.
Try googlelolz.com/
Uh, just go to google and type in “why won’t”
It truly does come up.
Check out: what are
It’s another good one.
Also try:
Why can’t
This is a fake fail! Everyone knows the last thing you typed in Google search that starts like that (why won’t) comes up first in the list. So they obviously searched “why won’t my parakeet eat my diarrhea” and then went back and typed “why won’t” so that would come up. The real question is, did they actually search for that or did they come upon it on someone else’s computer? OR did they purposely do it for failblog? If that’s the case, THEY FAIL.
Then how come it comes up on my computer when I type in “why won’t”?
Because your parakeet is tough, he doesn’t eat shit.
That would be because they featured this as a Yahoo Answers question on Tosh.0, and after that a crap load of people typed it into google to find it, thus making it a suggest search.
suggested*
I still stand by my Sven and Bjorn theory.
Normally I would find you a wet blanket and poo poo you. However, you warrant a better response. You are wrong, very very wrong. Apparently you are not part of the “everyone” of which you speak because I, and I am sure several others on here, have never typed in that phrase before yet when we all went to see if it worked, that was one of the phrases that just came up. When I started with “wha”, it brought up strawberries on my nipples instead of my salad and I assure you, I have never questioned why there were strawberries on my nipples. I KNOW why their are strawberries on my nipples and they sure as hell aren’t for the salad.
Also, when it’s something you personally have typed in previously it gives you the option to remove it from your list. Must be too many people embarrassed by their prior searches and then spouse/child, et al, gets on the computer and Googles something similar.
*eyes the strawberries*
Are you gonna finish both of them?
You strike me more as a cherry kind of guy.
*pops the question again*
Will I have to wear white?
Will I have to update my Facebook status yet again ?
Nah, I blow through husbands like a category 5 hurricane blows through shanty towns. It will be over before the ink dries on the marriage license. I am in it for the free gifts and honeymoon sex.
Hmmm… I like your style. Mind if I adopt that attitude?
Can I adopt your altitude and come for a ride in the hot air balloon?
♫Up, up and away in my beautiful
My beautiful balloooooon♪
*squeeze*
*waits in line to be blow through by Ryannon*
Do you eat asparagus?
No, it’s not normally in my diet.
♪ I am just a dreamer,
but you are just a dream,
You could have been
anyone to me…
You are like a hurricane
There’s calm in your eye.
And I’m gettin’ blown away
To somewhere safer
where the feeling stays.
I want to love you but
I’m getting blown away. ♪
~Neil Young
♪Here I am
Rock you like a hurricane!♫
~Scorpions
♪ I was born in a cross-fire hurricane
And I howled at my ma in the driving rain ♪
*roffles!*
*squeeze!*
rationalization fail
Oops…I lied. I can admit when I’m wrong! I’m still right about the first thing being what you last searched for when it starts the same!
You can get Sued for lying, you know.
If we team up, we can have a class action lawsuit against Sue. We need 5 people.
Will 5 eagles do?
Count me in.
Do hot air balloons count?
Lawyers become politicians.
Politicians are full of hot air.
Ergo, hot air is welcome in lawsuits.
Might be lying, but I’m gonna go with it.
Works for me! And I love your avatar!
*squeeze*
*squeezes the sand out of Gracie’s bags*
Thanks Gracie!
*feels light-headed*
*floats away*
What did I do??
Nothing a slick lawyer and a good cover-up can’t fix!
What about “Why won’t god heal amputees”. Seriously, that should be circled out the wazoo.
This is a FAIL fail. This person searched for “why won’t my parakeet eat my diarrhea” to get it as the first result there. It’s in his cookies. It’s not like this is the most commonly “why won’t” search. EPIC FAIL!!!
This reminds me of people who criticize a movie/book/TV show/art work without ever having seen/read it.
Yeah! :[
Ditto! :[
I know/understand exactly/precisely what you mean!
I did not read your comment, but I think it was delightfully uninformative.
Uh, no. I just went on to Google and typed
Why won’t
And it did the same for me.
because only CACAtoos will eat it
Tosh.0
poST COmment here.
No!
Hm… so many problems for an IPod?
That’s no good promo =D
This must have been done on purpose to get it up here, the question is in yahoo answers more than 5 times, to get it publicity, so it would show up on google.
Slightly OT:
Why is it that when you have asparagus your pee smells like it for at least a day after you eat it?
Your chicken smells like asparagus for at least a day after you eat it?
My neighbor jerks my asparagus.
(YAIME)
Is that what they’re calling it now?? I’m so out of the loop…
*leaves to find loop*
His neighbor is a vegan. She refuses to call it his meat.
How can you smell your pee once you’ve eaten it? What kind of mad person are you?
Is you pee thick enough to eat it?
Yes, you never had pee soup?
Is that like sweet pee soup?
That’s not appeeling.
This chickpees better stuff than that.
Urine for a treat, I make a great humus with chickpees.
Does the treat include a peepshow?
No but I could add boiled peenuts.
This appeeses me.
Maybe for dessert I will do up some snowpees.
All she is saying is give pees a chance.
*visualizing whirled peas*
Ready to sing Kumbaya now!!
If you were in New Orleans it could be Kumbalaya.
She want to be peesed, oh yeah, like I pees you.
I heard you have her pees?
Pees orf!
Like you’re such a hip pee.
Go plant your head in some peet :p
Google it…
What’s worse is that it doesn’t happen to everyone, but also not everyone can smell it. So, there are people out there whose urine smells funny after eating asparagus but don’t even realize it. I’m not sure if this is affecting their social lives, but I still find it troublesome.
I won’t date guys that eat asparagus.
It’s not the “dating” part that causes the problem.
I get this with asparagus, but also the Starkist smoked tuna, and assorted other items.
I have a very good sense of smell.
It’s never happened to me. Of course, I refuse to eat asparagus.
*squeezies3Bs*
*squeeziesLGBback*
I LOVE asparagus! Yum!
*marks Ms B off the dating list*
Only slightly?
Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Failblog: TMI edition…
NO, I’m not feeling lucky…
In reaching his plane seat, a man is surprised to see a parrot strapped into the seat next to him. The man asks the stewardess for a cup of coffee and the parrot squawks, “And why don’t you get me a whisky you bîtch.”
The stewardess, flustered by the parrot’s outburst, brings back a whisky for the parrot but inadvertently forgets the man’s cup of coffee. As the man nicely points out the omission of his coffee to the stewardess, the parrot downs his drink and shouts, “And get me another whisky you slùt.”
Visibly shaken, the stewardess comes back with the parrot’s whisky but still no coffee for the man. Unaccustomed to such slackness, the man decides that he is going to try the parrots approach, “I’ve asked you twice for a cup of coffee wench, I expect you to get it for me right now or I’m going to slap that disgustingly ugly face of yours!”
Next thing they know, both the man and the parrot are wrenched up and thrown out of the emergency exit by 2 burly stewards. Plunging downwards to the ground the parrot turns to the man and says,
“For someone who can’t fly, you sure are a lippy bastard… “
*snorekitty!*
Awwww! Isn’t he cute?
*gently pets snorekitty so as not to wake*
There was a old man sitting on a bench outside the mall.
A young man walked who had spiked hair that was orange, yellow, green and red. The old man just looked at him.
The young man said ” What’s the matter old man? Haven’t you ever done anything crazy in your life? ” And the old man said ”Well actully I have. I once got drunk and had sex with a parrot. I was just wandering if you were my son.”
*snorekitty*
Awwww! Isn’t he cute?
*gently pets snorekitty so as not to wake*
I’m feeling lucky
Is it your clown nose or your big, floppy shoes that are making you feel that way?
FAIL to FAILBlog… Epicfail.com had this almost a month ago.. way to FAIL
And we care because …?
There are an increasing amount of people who are saying this of late. They should be added to the list as “Epicfail Trolls.”
So, were the comments the same too? Oh, you don’t care about the comments? But you commented, so you must care about the comments.
*puff of logic asplosion*
Forgot to add:
I actually looked at that website and it sucks.
*logicalsqueeze*
*sistasqueeze*
*logisticallydifficultsimultaneoussqueezes*
*bluesqueeze*
*Mr.Spocksimultaneoussqueezes*
Once you see that pop up, it’s almost impossible not to click through.
That means the link collects hits, so the google brainiac in the sky collects those statistics and decides it’s ‘important’.
And really, if it’s silly and makes you smile, why shouldn’t it?
Don’t go all logical on us.
Don’t be so Stern.
*quivers with excitement*
Why shouldn’t it indeed, Evildave.
It’s all up to you. Are you feeling lucky, punk?
*feels Brewski’s luckies*
*click!*
*sneaks up on Brewski and SQUEEZES*
Feelin’ luckier every minute.
*squeezes all peeps in the thread*
Happy hump day!
*humps Brewski’s leg*
*blush*
My first four way.
“Dear Penthouse, I never thought it would happen to me……….”
Oh, yeah, the classic intro.
…it was just another ordinary Sunday afternoon, when I went into the 7/11 for a bag of Cheetohs. Behind the counter were two identical twin girls, dressed in matching mini skirts and skin-tight Chuck-E-Cheese t-shirts. The first girl opened her luscious pouty lips to ask, “Can I interest you in something…warm?” Then the other girl pulls out 3 rolls of duct tape, a feather duster, and 2 hamsters from underneath the counter…
Well, I need to stop and finish the schedule for about 20 people for next week at the restaurant. My favorite part of this Fail has to be looking at the recent comment box and seeing how profound we all seem:
eg, “Ryannon on The eternal question”
.
TTFN
I really like your view of the world, MRN. Come play later, if you can. kthanxbai.
*partingissuchsweetsorrowsqueeze*
TYPE IN ON GOOGLE “WHAT ARE” AND IT IS HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Really???????????????????
I CAN’T HEAR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MAYBE YOU SHOULD TYPE IN ALL CAPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111!!!
*mouths words at Brewski*
try why do
Is that a new sort of cuisine?
I believe it’s a form of martial arts.
♪Why do birds suddenly appear
Every time you are near?
Just like me
They long to be
Close to you!♫
Try, fail. Try again, fail better.
Why ask why?
Try Bud Dry!
Do they even still make that?
My brother and I used to joke back and forth about all the beer marketing.
Try NEW Bud Dry Lite Ice!!
*squeeze*
*squeeze*
New Bud Dry Ice Select!!!
*adds a Light ^*
(They spell it right, Miller spells it Lite)
No matter how they spell it, it’s still water.
Hope not. Drank myself sick on it two weeks after I turned 21. Couldn’t drink an entire beer for years after that!
Oooohhh…
*faints*
Gracie!!! How could you?!! You know how delicate Brewski is.
*shakes shaming finger at Gracie*
He should know he’s the exception to that rule!
*gives Brewski mouth to mouth*
I prefer my Bud mildly damp.
I prefer mine to stay in the cooler at the grocery store.
The Birth of a meme?
right now this is the most googled search!
Why is Birth capitalized?
Because it’s Historic! Momentous!! It’s not just a birth like you or I had, no no! It is a Birth!
But I was breach, doesn’t that count for something?
The bird(s) is/are DONE!!!
*drool*
I’m on my way!!
It’s already been picked up by one of the guys. Sorry.
But he couldn’t say “thank you” enough!! It was good to hear.
While he was helping me load the cart up, one of the other guys called the one who arranged all this (not the picker-upper) if it was time yet.
I think they are hungry.
i tried this and it is first everytime
I also tried this and it worked!
Now that is a lot of iPod fail.
Some others:
yesterday i . . . got lost in the circus
. . . went outside with my mama’s mason jar
Is Glenn Beck . . . jewish
…a mormon
…a christian
What would . . . brian boitano do
When I was young, I was sold a parakeet, but his head was just taped on.
oh you mean just like in dumb and dumber…are that little blind kid?
LOL I tried it and it realy dose show up
Also, go to google and type in “I like” without clicking search
More like an iPod fail
Well…why won’t he?
pathetic, I actually googled why won’ and it came up with that. . .
sad, very sade
If I were you i would eat more seasoned food so your feces taste better.
more like ‘apple fail’.
Maybe you should get a CACA-tiel.
its true
Parakeets won’t eat your diarrhea, but penguins will. That’s why they make better pets. And a ZOMBIE penguin might consent to be a sex partner, too.
I just tried this! got the same result.
yeah what about the one that asks why god wont heal amputees lol
Yeah, why doesn’t God coddle everyone? I mean, yeah, we want Him to butt out and let us do everything we want, but He should be there to save us any time there’s a problem. What’s up with that free will stuff, God?
Amen!
*churchladyroffles*
LOL. For anyone that is confused, this is from Tosh.0 on comedy central.
XD This is one of the funniest Fails in a long time. It reminds me of “I am afraid of Chinese people”.
“Why won’t god heal amputees” is also pretty funny.
Try “What Do i”
Result : What Do I have to Say to get inside her
IMMD
I suppose one could try, “May I get inside you please?”
all you have to do is type in why and this is the first result
HAHAHA! One of the why’s came up recently: “why is there a dead pakistani on my couch”
mine is different: one out of 3: why won’t my cat eat?
This is fake. The apostrophe is missing in the search field.
here is a link to why the suggestion comes up. http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/2380508/why_wont_my_parakeet_eat_my_diarrhea.html?cat=7
This is not fake. Go to Google and try it for yourself!
type in what are and it will come up “what are these strawberries doing on my nipples i need them for the fruit salad”
hell yeah im the 2000th voter
The funny thing is that this still works.
well, what about the dead pakastani on the couch??
it was from a commidian
Wow, actually search this and read the yahoo answer to it
You can never have too much… butter!
I’m more amused by the “Why won’t god heal amputees”
If you just type in the word “Why” it still gives you that as the top suggestion, but the ninth one down is “Why is there a dead Pakistani on my couch”
looks like a common googlebomb to me.
I am the one who discovered this!!!
Hehe. “Why are” gets “Why are Swedish girls so beautiful”
Hah, type in “Why” on Google and the second to last one that comes up is “Why is there a dead pakistani on my couch?”
Ahh, google. Source of epic lulz. XD
What about IS THERE DOG MEAT IN DOG FOOD
Type in what on google and then look at the sixth one down
omg its so true i just read it
If you type in “Why”, you get “Why is my poop green” and “why is there a dead Pakistani on my couch?”
Apparently, the thing about the dead Pakistani is a quote from Lost.
“WTF??? Why the hell would you give your parakeet your diarrhea??? Are you trying to kill it for God’s sake? Your diarrhea is your waste that hasn’t been fully solidified yet. Why on earth would you feed your pet that? Would you eat your diarrhea? Do you know ANYONE who would eat your diarrhea? No, I didn’t think so.” Source: The first result that came up.
If a parakeet would do that, the parakeet would be retarded
hahahaha,, this is funny suggestion!
What I wanna know is: Why won’t my parakeet eat my homework?
the real question is: why are you trying to feed your pet parakeet your poo?!?!
500th!
I think the bigger fail is that over half of them are about malfunctioning iPods.
exactly how do you copy a google search like that onto paint?(the program)
beast
Wow, iPods seem like they don’t do what they’re supposed to very often.
I just checked this out and the most recent “why wont” involves, “why wont god heal amputees”. Very interesting response.
i looked it up. it’s true. L. O. L.
All of you fail.
(imagines a parakeet trying to pick out the diarrhea from their ass)
i tried it and got “why wont god heal amputees”
I got
Why won’t my girlfriend blow me
You have to have genitalia to be blown.
i wonder……..i wonder………..
why are u feeding it diarrhea in the first place?
Seriously, this is the ultimate fail dude. I would love to know who searched it though….