Tarzan Fail
Video by: Mario S
This video is also viewable at: MySpaceTV | DailyMotion
Click to see G-Rated Pics and Movies Only
« Previous Club Sign Win | Candy Store Fail Next »
» 488 Failures in Communication
-
Recent Comments
granny on The U is silent novaric on The U is silent Arthur Eld on The U is silent Arthur Eld on The U is silent granny on The U is silent Arthur Eld on The U is silent mähr on The U is silent Spirals on Running Fail Britt on Seat Fail Hapqy on Tell Me What You See 
Cheezburger Network Blog
anal dirt!!
*grabs mallet* -TWACK!- *stomps off*
Hey! I appreciate you know how to handle a troll when you see one, but please, ask to borrow the mallet before you use it! Don’t take what’s not yours!
*nods head in agreement*
Haha you guys are so extremely funny.
In my opinion, role-playing that you are beating up trolls is even more annoying than the trolls themselves.
It’s “holeplaying.”
courtney never gets no love from the punklets.
No, it’s trollplaying…
+1
Spanking da Chita
Look in the mirror to see what’s truly annoying.
A dirty mirror?
So dirty it has to be ‘punished’.
Hey everyone look! There’s cake in the break room, and a fresh brewed pot of coffee.
Coffee?
*appreciates reminder*
*heads to break room*
*boils some water for BFF’s tea*
Where is the cake?
The cake is a lie
awesome
can we have the cake and eat it, too?
If you go the distance, there really is cake.
Hot water, and an assortment of teas are to left. You just couldn’t see it behind the cake.
*Brings in steeped tea of every flavo(u)r*
Will that do?
*gently takes the tea marked “English” from Emperor*
*puts teabag in cup and graciously accepts Leila’s boiling water*
*makes some tea*
*sips*
Aaaaah. That’s better. Cheers, Emperor and Leila!
Whew, I need it too. My mouth tastes like the inside of an inner tube.
You have got to describe the taste of the inside of the inner tube to me.
He is logged in to his gravatar account. Supported by wordpress. Giving the change in name. Like how sometimes dragon and admiral do.
Call me crazy but i really love reply’s
O.K. You’re crazy.
You can’t tell me what to do!
How did the 1:06 pm comment manage to come before the 12:56 pm one?
Little did Aja know, that he had entered…The Twilight Zone…
What an odd moment to switch off DST.
Indeed! 3:49 would have been MUCH more logical.
Oops. I just had an out-of-body experience.
I feel so much more like myself now. How do I look?
Your toque’s a little crooked.
Holy shit, Great Scott! Are you on Gizmodo as well?
I was an infrequent poster there, but not in well over a year.
Ah, well I thought I saw a comment from ya there recently.
It’s an impostor!
Much more like your old self.
You look a little blue, Brewski. Are you feeling ok?
And you still haven’t described the taste of the inside of an inner tube for Leila… Can you really put that kind of flavor in to words?
OK, all these changed avatars are really confusing me. I think I’m a Chimay bottle, and Gracie is a blue balloon.
Oh… innertubes? Sure, kinda rubbery. To truly experience the sensation, take one bicycle tyre/tire, chop into small pieces, garnish with parsley, and enjoy!
That’s what I see, too. I’ll take your word for the innertube. Smelling them is bad enough!
*bluesqueezes for Blueski*
I am still the same old dog. Maybe I will have to track down my blue santa hat a snap a picture in order to keep with the blue theme.
Brewski, what do you think of this new look?
Ah, very familiar!
And now, for something completely different.
I object to all this sex on the telly-vision!
I mean, I keep fallin’ off!
I’m always a bit bluey
People, Halloween was TWO DAYS AGO!!
Why are you all still dressed up in costumes??
It takes a while for the marker to wear off.
Costumes? COSTUMES?!
*runs out of the room sobbing*
Shhhh… Don’t cry… It’ll be alright…
What’s all this about changed avatars?
you look a little bit blue everywhere but around the edges.
*facepalm*
faece-palm? ewwwwww!
*headdesk*
Why is this not on failtoys???
feet?
feat.
Fiat.
Oooh, 4 letter F words!
Fine.
FIRE!
Flee!
Fudg.
foil
foul
Fool
So you think all four letter F words are profane?
Fore!
Frak.
Fiji
*FOOM!*
Woops. Sowwy.
*puts out fire on zooomz head and dusts her off*
Frag
Frig
Flip
Feel
Fail.
Original eh?
ok DW, since you said sowwy and dusted me off and all…
flop
FAKE!!!
fart
(iz surprized no one has used that yet)
Filo
*fibs* I thought of that, but decided to let it pass.
*Shivers*
Sorry, I’m stuck on this floe.
*cries*
flub
FOXY! Hello Dilly.
Poor Jane.
Yay, WN!!!
WOOO. WN.
*squeezes all *
*squeezes to emp and Ms B*
Jane has other devices to keep her happy.
Has she been talking to Chan?
No, just Cheeta.
Sounds like she’s planning some monkey business.
She just aped Fay Wray’s act.
Now Fay is going bananas to get back into the swing of things.
She’s a chimp off the old block!
It’s a jungle out there.
♫ In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the ape-man sleeps alone. . . ♫
LOL!!! Now that comment is a win.
♫ Welcome to the jungle!
Feel my, my, my serpentine,
I, I wanna hear me scream! ♫
♪ Jungle love it’s drivin’ me mad
It’s makin’ me crazy ♪
Heh, I interpret a nearly opposite meaning to that expression than how you meant it.
I was referring to Brewski’s comment. Pardon me, my brain is in a fog.
Dragons are sometimes called serpents.
Curvy dragons, in particular.
Takes me back to Latin class.
Lectio Prima
[...]
at mater ridens: “non serpens” inquit “sed vermiculus est”
that guy is having way too much fun doing that
For our video-challenged friends:
Looks like Tarzan is … jerking a soda.
I think he’s jerking chicken. I know, because he’s my neighbour.
So… he’s not collapsing the horse?
Nope — he’s sending out the troops.
He’s spanking a monkey, but it’s not Cheetah.
…doing the Roman helmet rhumba.
What about polishing the knob?
…buffing the banana.
All alone at the gas station of love using the self service pumps.
…jackin’ the beanstalk.
…Beating the bishop.
…paddling the pickle.
Hitchhiking to heaven…
Greeting Ms. Palm and her five friends.
…shaking hands with the unemployed.
…Jerkin’ the gherkin.
…choking the smurf
*Judysqueezes*
No smurfs were harmed in the making of this comment.
…holding your sausage hostage.
…petting the snake.
…freeing the willies.
…stoking the legend.
…getting a grip on the situation.
“saying hi to my monster”
…taming the one eyed monster.
Pulling the Pud
Spankin’ Frankie
Masturbating.
What?
Pulling a Vienna.
…being your own best friend.
kinging his own castle.
Burping the worm!
Me Tarzan, you… er…
surplus to requirements?
I think Jane left him. Tarzan is quite the swinger.
besides, he does have his animals to keep him company..
Yes, he’s simply di-vine.
He can’t see the forest for the trees. He should have let his relationship with Jane take root.
He’s bamboozled by his newly found skill.
What skill is that? He can now take care of morning wood?
Trees drôle, monsieur.
Me Tarzan you hand?
“Don’t try to follow me. I’m pretty handy with this.”
“Of that I’m sure. All my life I’ve awaited your coming and dreaded it.”
Human see, human do.
getting the happy sperm dudes ready for the long ride down the tunnel.
OMG! I’m FIRST!!!!!!!
Fail….
Fist Fail.
Hey, it fits the video…
You mis-spelled your name.
No, I think it’s more of a request than a name.
Look who powered the fail *5 eagles tears up* WhoeNellie.
Tarzan – teaching kids about the…”ways” of the jungle since 1912
First off. This guy is way too damn happy to show this one…otherwise, it’s pretty good but his eagerness scares me.
I don’t know what’s worse, the masturbating action figure or the old guy playing with it.
pumping tarzan’s monkey?
..not to mention the guy pressing the button.
*ahem*
Well, he was raised by apes.
I think we’re just lucky he’s not flinging poo.
Don’t give him any ideas! *ducks*
*quacks*
*gooses Gracie*
*flees withmuchspeed*
*takes a gander at Scott’s mumblemumble as he runs away*
Is he in kilter down there?
Sporrandically.
For his legal tender.
Compleatly.
Twill the Scots ever stop breaking the warp barrier?
only when tarzan pulls his fingers.
To quote Groundskeeper Willy, “Ach! ‘Tis no more than what God gave me, you puritan pukes!”
Sounds like he has really rough hands!
tarzan or the guy humping his bumpkin?
Are the PTB trying to send a message to Whoa Nellie? Come back!
*brings in shipment of Cabo Wabo*
This was just dropped off by a mysterious delivery driver. I think it’s meant to be a gift for the person who powered the fail today.
Louder Brewski boy like you got a set. COME BACK WHOENELLIE
Well, he’d want us to enjoy this Cabo Wabo with him, so I guess we should start passing out shots.
Whats Cabo Wabo?*5 eagles holds up shot glass with Hawaiian holla girl in a grass skirt.
*saunters onto sunlit deck*
*leans back in adirondack chair*
*puts feet up*
*lights-up Cuban Montecristo #2 and draws deeply*
*slowly sips scotch & soda*
Cheers, WN! Thank you for all the lovely, funny memories!
He’ll appreciate that.
*squeeze*
*skaweezie*
Sorry, LGB, He didn’t have an explanation. He’s fine, though.
Okay. Thanks. That’s good to know.
Is he going to set up a facebook profile so we can keep in touch, Brewski?
Will he eat eggs tomorrow morning, Brewski?
I’m going to buy him a Tarzan doll, so he’ll remember all of us.
Did I miss something?
failblog.org/2009/10/29/product-placement-fail/
More specifically.
failblog.org/2009/10/29/product-placement-fail/#comment-658854
Thanks, GS!
*squeeze*
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*pat pat pat*
*still sobbing*
I-I-I-I didn’t even get to say g-g-g-goodb-b-b-ye!
Awwwwwwwwww….!
*gives Ms B a great big squeezie*
Ms B, WhoaNellie didn’t respond to any his farewell messages. For all we know, WN is still checking up on the wishes left behind…go ahead and leave something.
Blue agave tequila from Mexico produced by rock musician Sammy Hagar.
What happened to those shots you were passing out, Brewski?
I think he fell down on the job. I never got one, either.
*sets a line of shot glasses across the bar*
*walks down the bar with upside down cabo bottle*
*hands shots to Gracie, Judy, and LGB*
To WN! Thanks for the good times! Cheers!
*Snags shot glass from bar*
Cheers!
Cheers!
*downs shot*
*slugs-down shot*
Cheers!
*shoots-down cheer*
Slugs!
Woo! Sorry I’m late. Gee, thanks for saving it for me, guys!
*downs shot*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!
*in hoarse whisper*
A “set”? The last I knew, they came in pairs. Has it been that long?
So, how many people will get thrown off because FB failed to observe the end of US Daylight Savings Time?
*raises hand*
I myself was wondering what the video fail was doing here already.
Yup, thoroughly confuzzeled. Seems they need a quick lesson in NTP.
Not That Picture?
Never Toss Penises?
Not. . . .THE POTATO!
*ROFL!!*
OK, office mates are going to get suspicious!!
Nice Trip, Preacher!
Wait! It he a vicar? No, that would be too much of a coincidence.
Never Too Pale?
Night to Party!!!
Naughty Themed Pyjamas.
No Toilet Paper.
Never tried pot?
Nice Try, Precious.
*RIGL*
Next Time, Plead.
Nope, Totally Preposterous.
Never Truncate Pumpkins.
Gracie???
*pokes*
Is that you? You’re blue too now?
(I think it’s Nude Twittering Police)
*pokes Brewski*
Can’t fight the trend, Brewski. Resistance is futile, and all that.
(Maybe it’s Newts Take Philadelphia)
She, too, is one of my minions.
(Nail the Porker!)
*blue group squeeze*
Name that porcine!
*squeezes back*
Nobody Tastes Purple
So can I turn blue too? I wanna be part o’ the Blue (wo)Man Group!!!
Would we have to start calling you “Blueski?”
Bluebrewski?
@Gracie: How does one taste purple?
@Brewski: Aquabrew
A blue butter cow??? Perish the thought!
*allaroundsqueezes*
Maybe we’ll just give you blue earrings.
*buttersqueezes*
Ooohhhh! Blue sparkly ones??? They'd be a nice accessory to my beautiful buttery body...
*facepalm*
HTML fail…arrrgh!!
Nice alliteration, buttacow! Take a bow!
Why, I didn’t even realize I had done that! Than—
*
*
Wait a minute…where’s the E.T. finger??
(tee hee hee!)
Whatever it is, it’s None Too Prudish.
Neuter three Porpoises.
Neuter Todd Palin.
Nards to pull?
Nice! Tarzan’s penis!
can’t reply…was thrown off board
Either that, or they stick with GMT/UCT and ignore DST.
Notice how the toy’s named “Rad Repeatin’ Tarzan”
Looks like Tarzan’s having fun all night long, grabbing his “vine”
Wow – he is a muscled version of my ex. Push the button again. Oh yeah it’s him.
Is the fail that someone stole the pint he was drinking?
My Goodness, My Guinness!
He’d be getting the beer all over the place with motion like that.
*nods vigorously*
The head would be the first thing spilled…
Dripping all over your hands and shoes, tsk, what a waste.
So welcome back to Standard Time everyone. Enjoy your long, dark, cold nights.
*sigh*
Happy Monkey Day, Cloral!
And a happy Monkey Day to you too!
You two drive me bananas.
So it would ape-ear.
Maybe he is getting ready for Jane. Don’t be so quick to judge.
I’ve always wondered what an invisible peaness looks like. Answer is getting closer and closer – if you know what I mean.
Peaness?
I’m sure he’ll come up with it soon…
Judging by the motions, that is definitely too much peaness!
No such thing, in my book!
And what book is that?
*raises left eyebrow*
…and why do you want to know exactly? Hmmm????
Ummm…
*shuffles feet*
*looks down at shoes*
Errr…A SCHOOL PROJECT! That’s it, a school project. I need to know for it.
Well, if that is true then carry on.
Just keep it PG or PG13.
Sounds like he is quite the book worm.
He’s 15. Not 8.
Exactly!
*notes down title from gracie*
Thaaank you!
*zooms away to nearest library*
And by library I hope you don’t mean DW’s store.
Reminds me of this true story. When I was going to college there was a bar off campus called “The Library”
“Yeah Mom, I spent all last night at The Library, honest!”
It’s more of a magazine, really.
that guy is moving tarzan’s hand
Funnyboi? Is that you?
Nah, he’s not even trying. Funnyboi would say:
It’s funny because it looks like Tarzan is moving his arm up and down as if he was commiting the act of masturbation, without actually revealing himself, and is roaring orgasmically at the same time.
*standing ovation for BFF*
I thought they took the failblog.org off the videos after they won the webby. Did they decide to put it back for any reason?
“DOT ORG!”
that’s pretty much how I sound too! Do I have grounds for copyright violations?
*scootches FAR away from Lindoro – withanincrediblequickness*
Tarzan’s got a BIG Banana!
Ape: “One two three four, I declare a thumb war!”
Tarzan: “Five six seven eight, I use this hand to masturbate!”
One of my friends dressed as Ron Jeremy at the Halloween party. He had a member hanging out of his pants that was big enough to do that motion on.
Umm…
I don’t whether it was legal for me to have read Cloral’s comment now.
*bow-chicka-wow-wow-chicka-wow-wow*
It wasn’t BFF. I am sorry I couldn’t protect you from it. Will you just hurry up and grow up already?????
Um…Stay right there. I have an idea.
*hops into DeLorean car*
*zooms down road at 88mph*
*disappears*
whaz dees about zoooming down the road???
Cheese it BFF, it’s the heat!
Who’s zoooming who?
Heat up BFF? he haz cheez?
*twitching*
Is…that…LOLs-s-s-p-sp-speak?
never, just posing!
Posing, eh?
*gets camera*
The way I see it, if you’re gonna build a time machine into a car, why not do it with some style?
*worries because BFF disappeared*
*appears back in present day*
*steps out of car, dazed*
They…the city…the robots…Al Gore…
*collapses, twitching*
Again with the fainting. I swear you must be anemic.
*fans BFF*
Can’t wait to hear the story.
*wakes up suddenly, scaring the socks of Leila*
THEY’RE REAL! WE HAVE TO STOP AL GORE BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE!
*scrambles up*
*hops into jeep*
I’ll explain laaaaateeeeer!!!
*zooms away*
*sigh*
Of course, he’s heading right for the cliff again…
Good thing I wasn’t wearing any socks.
I think he may have consumed a little too much caffeine today.
Doesn’t that Jeep ever run out of gas?
What? Of course not! That would be so cliched of me! Why, I’m driving safely from now o-
*speeds into puddle*
*swerves and rolls down hill*
*crashes into tree, then carries on into road below*
*hits oil truck*
*explodes in an enormous fiery ball*
Yes, when the fire goes out.
*sigh*
It’s almost sad the way those clones become so unstable at the end.
Are you sure that was a clone?
*calls weakly from underneath burning wreckag*
*beams BFF directly to sick bay*
Al Gore IS a ROBOT!! I knew it. No one is that stiff!
*snerk*
*pops iron fortified protein shake*
*offers to BFF*
there there now….Al Gore all bye bye
robots…bye bye…ZA, present and accounted for
He will always need Jane!!!
sounded like he accidentaly used hand sanitizer instead of lotion
*swings from vine*
*swoops into brutalnate’s comment*
*snatches ‘a’ and ‘l’ from “accidentaly”*
*frames with thumb and forefingers*
*swingsawaywithaTarzan-ness*
*watches LGB’s Tarzaness with wonder*
You accidenty the action verb.
and its made by Disney, sigh…
*crickets*
Blog very quiet today…
*ducks to avoid cricket ball*
Woah, should you really be playing cricket indoors?!
*Gets the cricket bat in the face*
Damn it BFF! Warn me next time.
*swipes cricket ball*
Hahahahahahahaha!
*runsawaywithaquickness*
*wanders out in front of Ms B while distractedly looking the other way*
*CRRRASSHHHH
Oof! What happened?
*dials 3333*
Call the bartender while you’re at it. I’ma gonna need another drink.
Ouch! That crash knocked
meoff my asterisk!Should I call an ambulance?! Or a urologist?!
Uhhhh, I think I’ll just walk it off. Thanks though.
Either way, I don’t need a urologist, thengeweveddymuch!
Too quiet if you ask me. . . I think their up to no good.
*innocent look*
Honest, I just went to lunch!
I’ve been out to lunch for years. I don’t remember seeing you there.
Yeah? That’s what they all say…
*eyes Ms B suspiciously*
*Turns spotlight on Ms B*
Tell us. . .what did you have for this supposed lunch of yours?
Sushi. And it was yuuuuummmmy!
Mmm… Sushi RA … *salivates*
And Oh … *squeeze Ms B*
Good to see you back!!!
*squeeze*
It’s good to be back. I tried to pop in a few times while I was sick, but my brain was too foggy to try and keep up with you smart people.
So you just played Bejeweled Blitz instead.
*squeeze*
And did surprisingly well.
And we are all jealous.
Yup, I thought I noticed that earlier today. It’s not always like this on Mondays is it?
The #@%$&!s here actually want me to work! Can you believe the nerve of some people?
Yeah, I hear ya. For some reason when I take an unexpected week off, they think I need to make up for it and do all the work that didn’t get done when I wasn’t here.
work is a 4-letter word…
*looks up*
*stops what she was doing*
Wha?
I was working, honest. Just concentrating on … um, work. That’s all.
Don’t have time for work gotta keep gathering these NUTS!!!
Wow! You should consider getting plastic surgery if you have to gather your nuts. Ask for the NutSackLifterUpper™.
Now THIS is more like it! It was so quiet there for awhile, I seriously considered poking some trolls…
NOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooo
*pokes LGB*
*pokes LGB too*
*doesn’t know why*
:[
*pokes Dragon*
:[
*squeeze*
Oo, you’ll pay for that!
*TICKLETICKLETICKLE!!*
*pokes Gracie*
*whips out feather*
*tickles ribs*
*SQUEEZE*
*giggles and runs away*
*bops LGB playfully on the nose*
Ooops, sorry …
*grabs ShamWow*
*wipes decaying matter off LGB’s nose*
You think that alone is bad, on the back of the box is a picture of the product that looks EVEN WORSE!!!
*turns monitor around*
LIES!!!! I don’t see anything!!!!!
Yeah, the liar! When I turn my Vista around, the view’s MUCH better!
Oh no, here we go…
Cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck
Damn you Marius!
What has gotten into you?
Seems to be in a real fowl mood.
I’m sorry Leila.
I understand that looks like mindless spam to you but it’s a reference to this comment
ht tp://failblog.org/2009/11/02/club-sign-win/#comment-662531
*feels embarrassed*
…and since you
ed ^5 times hence the comment.
Suzie?
Suzie Creamcheese?
*Pops in quickly to put BSR to sleep and remove suggestions*
Sorry about that.
*Waves*
*Pops out*
*Pops back in*
*Awakens BSR*
*Snickers*
*Pops back out*
Strange things happening, but I feel allright again. Phew.
Now go an change your armour.
*Sniffs*
Oh, right. I forgot all about that.
How many of you believe that Ms B participated in this event? CLICKIE!!!
*raises hand*
*glances @ Brewski*
I KNOW she did….I saw her tatoos
Come to think of it, what were YOU doing in Colorado zooomz?
um, er…it was a research project…yeah, a research project
*raises hand*
*raises other hand*
*raises foot*
*raises other foot*
*falls on floor*
And hey! I think I saw Brewski in there, too!
I see no one is really surprised.
Gracie, I am cutting you off. No more drinks for you sista!!!
*helps Gracie off the floor*
I’m guessing that Gracie can play a great game of Twister.
Depends on your definition of “great.”
*squeeze*
…and whether or not we play it in Boulder, CO (pumpkins optional)
*squeezesGracie’sballoon*
… Okay, I know this is Fail Blog, but c’mon!
Doublepost.
Actually, post-and-a-third.
… Okay, I know this is Fail Blog, but c’mon! Seriously?
I mean, if I walk in and in the first comment I click on, you guys have already progressed from an innocent game of Twister to squeezing each other balloons…
I mean, jeez. At least wait ’til I get here. I don’t even have my camera out yet, fer cryin’ out loud.
*remembers Twister from back in the day*
Hey, MRN! You wanna play Twister?
I’m definitely up for a game or two. Do we need that plastic sheet with the colors, or can we ad lib?
I’ll have what Gracie’s having
then I’ll play anything!
Auntie Em, Uncle Henry, Toto! It’s a twister! It’s a twister!
*chases Aja into the storm cellar*
OK, where were we? Who’s turn is it?
Yours. Left foot on that pile of canned goods.
We’re all in the storm cellar? That explains the forty pounds of beef jerky.
*has never actually played Twister*
Wow, Aja! First The Princess Bride and now this?!?!?! What are we going to do with you?
I have a lot of catching up to do.
there’s no place like failblog
there’s no place like failblog
clicks heels together
wakes up…AT WORK! uugghhh
Oh no! We lost one to reality!
Get the mini bar! STAT!
h…hu…hurry…
There’s no time for ice and mixers – straight vodka and Kahlua is our only hope!
rip ‘em open…..
pour ‘em down….
I can’t picture how you can do a masturbating Tarzan toy better, but maybe that’s why I’m not a video producer.
CUT!!!
Nonononono NO, you’re doing it all wrong! See?! Like THIS…
*Tarzan screams*
Okay, now lets take it from the top, but this time, do it with feeling.
boom chica bow wow
Come on! This toy is from 10 years ago… Lame!
I really don’t think it’s wise to instruct a masturbating Tarzan to “come on.”
Just a thought.
Director Shadow?
Forgot to remove that. See above. ^^^
*RIGLMS*
and you know this because….
The real question is,
why the hell did that guy buy it in the first place?
He bought it to fantasize about what he does behind closed doors. AAAAAaaaaaaaaaggggggggghhhhhh I will kill him.
that’s the same sound i make when i beat my meat
Do you use a mallet or the smooth pestle type?
You young whippersnappers and your fancy-schmancy sex toys! Why, when I was your age, we did it with a rock, and by George, we were HAPPY!
Rock and sex. That’s all you’re interested in!
I changed my avatar cause there was too many blue ones.
Okay.
Do you have a problem with blue, 5 eagles?
If he doesn’t watch his step, Joe from Blue’s Clues is gonna whoop his @$$.
Ya I am not in the upper class yet with the rest of you peeps.
Sometimes you just need a release.
Just make sure you don’t release prematurely.
Parole denied!!
jenny sometimes suffers from premature articulation… and a severe case of camera-itis.
when do the new views of you go up, jenny?
OMG that is so wrong! haha. I wonder what the Jane doll does???
Jane bends over and barks like a dog… why do you wonder?
Like a gorilla saurkraut.
Like Tarzan in this fail, it appears Solo Piano is playing with himself
Stravinsky’s Piano Suite for the Right Hand?
sorry people, but the best part of this is that its some old guy who is demonstrating. that means he was walkin through the toy aisle lookin’ for a toy for his grandson and was like, ”ey gramma, come check this out”
/me slaps knee
Ha LOL Self-yiff!
Tarzan win…
Twisted twisted!!!
flopculture
OMFG I had that toy as a kid. Mine only moved its arm up once at the beginning of the yell, though… maybe this is some weird malfunction?
It has already been on “fail toys” on youtube for a LONG time.. Check it out
I cried manly tears…
old one heard so around 90′ FAAPAPPAPAPAPPAPAPAPAPAAA
The screaming totally completes it. XD
I wonder if they are all defective like this…
It’s not a defect; it’s just a for-shit design. Disney has quite a few fail toys.
They were generally bad about designing the Tarzan toys.
o o o o o o o o o o o OHHHHHHHH WOOOOO OOOOOOOOO
Mike Mozart did a review on this toy, search for Mike Mozart Tarzan on Youtube
That was so weak..The fail is this asshole has a Tarzan doll…
Wholy crap… How long is his… I had true ROTFL ;D
is this really a kids toy?
I didn’t read every comment, but I searched for specific words trying to find what seems obvious.
Did ANYONE else bother to notice that the toy doesn’t actually do that… You can see the hole in the back of the box with his finger pushing the arm up and down.
This really isn’t a fail…it’s a fake.
It was funny at first, but a second look revealed the obvious.
omg i didnt notice that until i read this comment lol
i agree…funny at first but now that i see him moving it, its not funny anymore
I have an Anakin Skywalker toy that does exactly that with his roboclaw. You squeeze his legs together and he goes wank-wank-wank. It is kind of adorable.
All I can say to that is “fapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfap”.
Mickey Mouse would certainly never like that toy! Total carnage!
Mickey Mouse: ‘I know what that toy is! No Disney fan would like it!’
batteries not included
I wonder what he does with his other hand…
Nice ass
thanks gabriel
COPY CAT! mike mozart did this first!!!!!
Tarzan training for management. He obviously has great leadership potential.
hahahaha. i think tarzan needs to calm down. haha
aaa
LOLZ,now we know the dark secret of Tarzan
sanyo is very wierd also, i think thats hot in a guy
Tarzan got tired of chasing after the real Jane, so he decided to name his right hand “Jane”.