Song Title Fail
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Meh.
Meow.
Meowth
pee-ka-tchoo!
pee-ka-*sneeze*
PENIS
I broke the chain
C-C-C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER
Yeah , don’t cross my path !
What does it say under the notes?
” Love little pussy kits coat is so wrong, and
…insert her we’ll do me what kits I’ll”
♫ I love little pussy, her coat is so warm. And if I don’t hurt her, she’ll do me no harm. ♫
That’s always been the way I’ve lived it
There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you!
Now, what in the H-E-double hockey sticks did you think you were doing when you handed me that Multidimensional Document Storage Device (MDSD™)? Did you even TEST it before you gave it to me?!?
*normal size font onna interwebs squeeeeeeeze*
Of COURSE I tested it! Did you – omg – tell me you didn’t -
That’s right, mister:
I GOT SENT TO THE 5TH DIMENSION!
It’s a bloody miracle I made it back!
*notes current lack of blood*
Were you a vocalist or a musician in the band?
Scary!!
♪ Up, up and away, in my beautiful, my beautiful, balloooon ♪
Hay – you run into that 6-year-old Colorado kid?
Naw, he was hiding in the closet the whole time.
Right next to me.
OMG!!!! ARE YOU MICHAEL JACKSON!?
blatantly >.>
the rest is:
I’ll not pull her tail or drive her away.
But pussy and I very gently will play.
No kidding. It was on a record when I was a kid.
Also “Pussy cat, pussy cat, where have you been? / I’ve been to London to look at the Queen”. Also “Ding dong bell, pussy’s in the well“.
Maybe this is why kids don’t learn nursery rhymes any more, all the words have become hazardous.
yes – I know that one to. It means a cat, people!!
Of course it means a cat! Every man means he wants a cat when he says “I want some pussy!”
I think it’s act’s actually “Love little pussy her coat is so warm, and-
hurt her and she’ll do me no harm. I’ll – “
pedobear approved!
what? I love little pussy too! specially siamese pussies with their sapphire eyes and their black paws with their pretty brown colored fur… they’re just the cutest ^_^
I think it’s actually “Love little pu55y her coat is so warm, and-
hurt her and she’ll do me no harm. I’ll – “
Now wait a second here! I posted too, but didn’t think of censoring the word that’s prominently displayed in the picture!
*screams meniaclly*
*goes all savage and stuff*
*rips the moderators head off*
*gruesomely devours the moderators brains*
*savagely devours the rest of the moderator*
*leaves a horrific, bloody, meaty mess behind as a warning to others!*
*offers ZA a cold beer with which to wash down the carnage*
Thanks, but after this week I’d rather savor the carnage for a while.
Damn, close call.
“… love little pussy her coat is so warm, And _
… n’t hurt her she’ll do me no harm, I’ll _”
Don’t know the tune myself, I just had really good eyes when I was alive. Or maybe it was the 245 Trioxin that gave me super-human sight.
no, I suspect lady gaga was affecting your sight.
Whaddafu?!?!?!?
O-kay…. Who’s messing with the blog?
Huh?
And here I was about to blame Arthur.
It could have been Arthur.
*stops poking @ the blog/intertoobs*
If that was for what I think it was for, it was in moderation for that. I destroyed the moderator (who is now also a zombie, by the way), found it and got it up. I mean come on already, the “word-in-question” is in the picture this fail is about!
*snorkgiggles*
*bites tongue very hard*
*thinks this is the theme song to someone’s life*
Ouch!!!!!
*suspects he knows who Suzie is talking about*
Go ahead, you can let it out. You’re entitled.
Thanks, Brewski…
*finds effigy of certain someone*
*indecisive on torture technique*
Any suggestions? Anyone?
I’d start with several needles in the… well, ya know, a little less pea-ness.
Methinks that’s a good start…but we should heat them up first…
*makes nice bonfire*
*places long, pointy needles in flames*
Yikes! I can’t watch!
*looks away, wincing slightly*
What?!? Don’t like the sound/look of burning flesh?
BWWWWAAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!
*waits with excitement*
(My mind read *waits with excrement*)
Oooh, I like that idea, too!!!
*begins to think evil thoughts*
So wait, is the blog de-evolving now?
*bwahahaha* Ohh geeze…it’s a good thing I’m alone..Judy, that was awesome.
*curtsies to Anniebunny*
*Passes lighter fluid to SuzieQ*
Show him how hot we think he is.
Oh, he’ll be smokin’, all right…
*wonders what roasted pig smells like*
Smells like . . . victory.
*wonders if this is where BaconLube™ comes from*
cheeseburger lube?
Lemme know if you need a little more heat there, Suzie. Always happy to oblige.
DW! Just the person I was looking for!!!
*squeeze*
Would you be a dear and FOOOOOOOOM him, erm, I mean it??
*giggles*
They say music reflects the true inner emotions of the composer…
My husband wrote this??
*feeling very catty right now*
Just make sure you know where to draw the (fe)line.
And don’t leopard to any conclusions.
Quit lion to me.
your such a cougar
Lion? No, I’m gonna puma him, that is if I get the chance…
He must be a real Jag(uar).
No, he’s more of a BMW
“Burnt Man Walking”?
See:
ht tp://failblog.org/2009/08/27/bmw-fail/
It’s not as funny if I have to explain it…
Actually, I thought it was a BMW WIN!!!111!!!
*hears Arthur cursing in distance*
Actually, with all the violence, this does not sound like a BMW win. More like Audie made another move.
*looks down*
I don’t have an Audi, I have an innie.
most guys – even if living challenged – would never admit to such a thing.
You mean, you can actually see your belly-butnut through all the decay, ZA?
I don’t think he’d be walking after that.
Psssst! Did SuzieQ get away with breaking a pun run ^^^ there?
Psst…I think I did…
*walks away smiling*
*drop tackles the buttery cow*
Now you must go in the Pun Run Breaker Naughty Corner and think about what you have done.
Have a cookie while you contemplate.
*hands SuzieQ a jar of cookies*
B-b-b-b-but??? I…oh, well…
*sits in corner*
*passes on cookies*
*offers to FB friends*
Want one?
No cookies for me thank you.
You can leave the naughty corner anytime you know. As long as you learn your lesson that is.
*enters naughty corner*
Ooooooh, I LIKE it here!!
*takes cookie*
Ah! My (former) husband was a BMW, as well.
But, “A mule and his honey are soon parted.”
Hee, hee…I like that!
*makes mental note*
May I borrow for future reference?
Of course, of course! *begins singing* -a horse is a horse…oh, wait. Not a horse.
I made a LOL over on ICHC with “a mule and his bunny are soon parted,” if you “do” ICHC at all. I found the “bunny” in the pic too funny NOT to “capshun” it.
*snork*
♪An a$$ is an a$$, he has no class,
his peaness is constantly out his pants… ♪
*snork!*
Her coat is so warm!
Not in Brazil!
‘Tis hot!
not courtney love!
oh, i remember this one
I had to play this song on the piano at school >,<
how is a song about a cat fail?
It’ll come to you…
… but it’s coming to you because it wants to, not because you called it…
*Stuffs cat in Schrodingers box.*
Mwuhahahaha
Considering how small it is, I don’t expect there is much chance of applause afterwards.
the box or the pu55y? is there a difference?
Make sure you tickle it!
a tickled pu55y is a happy pu55y.
just don’t act too interested or it won’t let you touch it.
Yes. Come.
Congratulations, your mind isn’t dirty.
well,not yet anyway….
Keep hanging around here and that will change.
We have the flashy thingie to make you forget too.
I thought it only worked on the living.
This flashie thingie was retro fitted to work on the undead forgetful or not. Can’t take chances.
Revamped, if you will…
rawr?
Looks like someone forget to put [A] in the title.
Ai loav litl pussy?
“Her coat is so warm…”
Me to
To where?
to the moon and beyond!!
To infinity and beyond!
Cleaning the litter box…not so much.
*gigglesnort*
Clickie!!!
Thanks! I always wondered what the lyrics to that song were!
*adds comma, extra ‘o’, and period to David’s post*
*up there ↑*
“, Meo to.” ?
Yeah. Sorry, LGB, but afraid that still doesn’t make any sense at all.
*runsawaywithaquickness*
*I’m afraid
The irony of this is just sickening.
*trips Shadow on the way out*
*decides not to thwack/other, since it’s Friday*
*takes shoes and socks off, instead*
*tickles mercilessly*
No!… NO!… NOO!
*laughs uncontrollably*
*puts extra ‘o’, ‘,’ and ‘.’ in Shadow’s name so that it now reads: “Shadoow,.©”
Awwwww … poor baby!
*fixes Shadow’s name so that it now reads: “o Shadow, ©.”
There. How’s that?
I prefer just to keep the ‘o’, ‘,’ and ‘.’ in storage… in case of an emergency, y’know?
What kind of an emergency?
Do you really wanna know?
I do, I do!
*whispers in DW’s ear*
*waits*
An “o” followed by a pause before a period could be considered an emergency by some.
*snork*
now i want to hear the rest of the song
Ew?
No, mew, silly.
Mmm..
Meeee..
Meweee
Okay, how about a new fail?
It is retro Friday. One should be along later.
Yay!!
Okay, just for you Leila.
Marius, I just married off my daughter. Why didn’t you tell me about this product say 4 years ago? Would have been handy then. *sigh*
Sorry, I didn’t know about it until recently. I was using the beta version known as “Little Sister”. It was susceptible to bribes and proved ineffective.
Perfectly understandable.
Thanks for the vid. Made me COL.
Choke On Lunch?
Close NS. The answer we are looking for is: Chuckle Out Loud.
*gives NS a gift for playing*
It’s a DVD – (400 hours) on the many usues of plastic sporks.
…But no Titanium ones?
No…just plastic. Sorry DW.
The former German chancellor?
Collect Old Llamas?
Cough on Lamborghinis?
*snorkittyroffle!*
Awwww, isn’t he cute?
*gently pets sleeping kitty so as not to wake*
*puts tiny Halloween Breathe Right™ strip on kitty’s nose, ’cause GS isn’t here to do it*
they such a tease
FAIL = Open Invitation To All Trolls
*sits and watches*
I did and I am really surprised. I wonder what prompted him to leave FB.
What? He left FB?! Where is this post?
Are you playing?
ht tp://failpeeps.wordpress.com/2009/09/24/lets-get-out-there-and-vote-failpeeps/
…and, I gotta tell ya, I’m not happy about it. Also, I think a lot of what he says is spot-on. But, we all have different convictions. Although I don’t agree with some of the fails and/or the voting process, I can’t replace the *snorks* and creativity I get here on a daily basis. It keeps me sane. So, I have to stay.
Agreed. Look past the ‘ugliness’ and focus on the laughter we all share here.
You should look back in past fails (way past fails). It used to be a LOT uglier here. Back when we had “Burn of the Week” still. We were constantly attempting to burn each other. Personally, I think we’ve gotten better since then.
What does it mean when you attempt to burn each other? I am not familiar with that statement.
And oh…*squeeze*
“Burning” is when, in an argument, you offer an extremely good riposte to the person you are arguing, hence the phrase “ooooh, you got burnt!”
Wow! Makes me think that perhaps I am getting old OR am too sheltered and need to get out more.
*squeeze*
It was like a near constant insult war. It got tiresome, and mean. And it encouraged people to make more than one “persona” for the blog. It got pretty ugly.
Ooooooh. I see. Anyone we currelty know?
Never mind. I don’t want to start something.
You can go back in the archives and see, if you like. But just make sure you also make note of the comment time stamps. Sometimes people comment months after the fact.
But… I thought Fuzz preferred the old ways, insult wars and all? That seems totally at odds with being concerned about “unkindness” and “insensitivity”?
I know.
He was so proud when he won BOTW. Brought it up quite often, actually.
Quite often!
So do other sites that publicize Failblog.
I seem to have failed to make my point.
I give up.
Uhoh, this is making me think here. We get censored for using our ‘magination, the trolls post what they want. Votes ignored, hateful fails (I didn’t know what the chainsaw repair night club was, the name still sounds … um … contradictory?) …
No, I enjoy the insanity to much. I don’t wanna think about it. I’ve got to like you folks dangit, I’d miss you all to much. Besides, I’m a zombie, I’m not supposed to be thinking.
BRAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIINNNSSS!!!!!ONE!!ELEBENTYONE!!
Here, sweetie, have mine. It’s Friday afternoon, and I not going to use them again until Monday. Just bring me some fresh ones by 9:00 a.m. then, ‘k?
*gives head to ZA*
I lose more keyboards that way. I should know better than to read FailBlog when I have iced tea in my mouth.
*SNORK!!!!!!*
Sheesh, I leave for ONE HOUR…
Wow! I leave for 10 days and everything changes.
*spews coffee all over screen*
ROFLMAO!
I missed that the first read!
ShamWow™ over here, NS! Brewski’s just gone and soaked his monitor again….
Please let me borrow that shamwow….oh laws, I’ve missed ya’ll so much..
*adds her own keyboard to those needing to be replaced*
I laughed so hard I *FOOOM!*-ed.
*Snickers*
Heads up ZA!
If it wasn’t before, it likely is now!!
BOING!!!!
YOU GUYS ARE AWFUL! That was NOT what I meant, and you darn well know it. If I wanted to make ZA a grilled cheese sandwich, I would have come out and said it.
AAACCCKKK!
:barf:
*vanishes to very bottom of cuddle puddle in disgust*
It’s okay, Judy, we’re not laughing at you. We’re laughing with you.
I’m serious.
:[ See?
Now I’m REALLY glad I didn’t clickie Granny’s clickie!
*snickers*
Thanks for cheering me up, everyone!
No, we’re laughing near her!!
Well… you kinda did just come out and say it…
Suggestion for next time…perhaps a better choice of words would be “hands head to ZA”.
(sorry Judy, we love you!)
*sympathetic squeeze*
Me to
:[
*makes sure shoes and socks are firmly attached to feet*
*adds comma, extra ‘o’, and period to LGB’s post*
*runsawaywithasuperduperquickness*
You could’ve at LEAST put them at the end!
*speeds after Shadow in McLaren F1*
So, you’re all just going to leave me in the Cuddle Puddle all alone?
*reaches up, grabs the shirt hems of all adjacent failpeeps with both hands and drags all into the puddle*
AAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!
Whoops!!
*falls backwards*
o hai!
*squeezes*
You know, the funniest part is in trying to understand the point of that. I mean do you expect a zombie to act like the living in that instance, do you really expect a zombie to … you know … have a happy ending?
*grabs a plastic tarp*
*wraps it around Judy*
*squeeze*
*removes tarp, leaving Judy … untainted*
That wasn’t what I meant, you undead sicko!
*thwacks ZA with a plastic bag-covered pillow*
*picks up ZA’s head, left arm, and assorted fingers and hands back to ZA*
*picks up ear*
Ummm, you’ll need this too.
*is slowly dragged in by Judy*
*clutches at air with hands*
No! No! No! AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!
*disappears below surface*
Anyone manning (or “personning”) the bar this afternoon?
Funny you should ask.
Tequila, anyone?
I dunno about the bar, but I’ll take care of the barbecue. Let’s take a vote… I could make steak, cheeseburgers, chicken, hot dogs… or all of them. Anybody have a preference?
Sparkling cider. Extra sparkly.
I’m feeling dangerous again.
STEAK!!!! Very rare please!!
*calls from underneath slimy surface of puddle*
No, don’t mind me. I’ve just been dragged to the bottom of the cuddle puddle, no biggy. I’m also drowning, but hey, no big deal.
I have to wait for steak. Every other Wednesday is Steak Night at a bar a friend of mine owns. Amazingly delicious steak, baked potato, and salad – for $12.95!! And he has a new stout on tap that’s pretty good too
“I’ll have what ZA’s having.”
You sure, BFF? Really? Alright, if you insist…
*continues grilling up the bestest take Avis will have ever tasted*
*hands BFF down a shot o’ Cabo*
Take?
Yes. I think so.
*sigh*
*steak
Cut me some slack, I’m in the middle of a cuddle puddle, letting a man drown in said cuddle-puddle, talking, and grilling, all at the same time. A few speeling erors are to be excpected.
*jumps out of cuddle puddle*
*scares the living daylights out of everyone*
BOOO!!! Yeah, didn’t see that one coming, did ya?
Sowwy, I was a mite confused for a minute there.
*blinks at BondFan*
Alright everybody, food’s done.
*lays out an array of condiments, side dishes, and meats (grilled to all levels of perfection), and pretty much every kind of delicious foodstuff one could hope for on a looooooooooooooong table*
Enjoy.
*is startled and accidenty her drink all over BFF*
What a wonderful way to end a Friday afternoon. Good friends, good food, and great laughs.
*snuggle-hug-squeezes all*
There you are!
*SQUEEZE!*
Hey, Admiral! *squeeze*
I saw what you said up there. Did you want a thwack with a plastic bag, too?
BTW – the truck just pulled up out front. It should be full of replacement keyboards and monitors, and a few laptops in case anyone had one ruined today. I borrowed Arthur’s credit card. Since he rarely gets to participate in cuddle puddles, I thought he’d be pleased to assist in this way.
Excellent thinking, Judy!!
“plastic bag-covered pillow”!
Jeebus, WN, what kind of tequila was that, anyway?
I… Um…. Hmm.
Hehe…
BAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
I’m so glad I don’t bring food around the computer!
He didn’t say he “left;” just that he’s taking a break.
Is he having a Kit Kat bar?
*ducks behind bar*
*pulls out sixguns*
*smiles maniacally*
*scowls @ Shadow*
*points to “NO SIX GUNS ALLOWED” sign on the wall*
How ’bout Five guns?
You’d leave me defenseless from the onslaught of trolls?
*reconsiders*
Um…well, okay. Just be careful and don’t hurt FB friends.
I haven’t hurt a single one. My bullets have been trained to detect and avoid FB friends.
Sorta the opposite of SCUD missiles?
Prezackly. They’re very SMART that way.
I think I’m gonna start calling you “Lamont”. Just because.
Well, “just because” is a better reason than some of the other ones for which I have gotten nicknames…
I don’t wanna know!
Would you prefer “Cranston” to “Lamont”?
I have no preference.
Damn word-wrapping. Aw well, if you really want to know the story you can just view the source code of the selection…
Do you know who Lamont Cranston is?
No clue. Should I?
Oh. D’OH!
*headdesk*
*x50*
With a name like Shadow, you most certainly should. Google Lamont Cranston.
ROFLMAO!!!!
they really need to change it to kitty
Maybe he really does like little pussy….
Finally, a song after my own heart.
So we’re sticking with the creepy vibe eh? Three dammits for rewind friday!
DAMMIT, DAMMIT, DAMMIT!
I like you, chez. I really like you.
*specialFridaysqueezybackatcha*
That’s a WIN, not a fail!!!
Uhm, you folks have really never heard this song before?
I suppose next we’ll be commenting on the Flintstone theme’s “We’ll have a gay old time”. Or ‘Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas’ “Make the yuletide gay”.
Come on folks, lets get some real fails.
*notes logbook*
In elementary school we had to sing a song that included the line:
“the lady was gay”
Every time we sang the song people would crack up on that line. Until one day our teacher got pissed off and yelled at us for about 5 minutes. After that, nobody laughed.
your teacher played cheech & chong?
Her teacher was Sister Mary Elephant???
Class? CLASS? SHADDUP!!!
too bad dave didnt hear her cuz dave aint here, man.
Thing-kew.
In the “Chronicals of Narnia” books (I don’t remember which one-it had giants in it) Lucy goes through the castle and “made love to everyone”. We read these books in my seventh or eighth grade religion class. When we got to that line (it was my turn to read aloud damnit) the class just fell apart. It was a good ten minutes before the teacher was able to restore order.
I musta got the edited version cuz I sure dont remember Lucy making love to anyone.
Those were the exact words, but at the time it was written, it didn’t mean what we took it to mean. It meant that she was going around being just merely friendly, being nice to everyone. Charming, as it were.
*cleans potato chip spray from monitor*
If I remember correctly, Lucy was about 8 years old. I’m sticking with charming.
I showed the movie “Rebecca” to my Brit Lit crime class once, and at one point, Laurence Olivier tells Joan Fontaine that he wants to take her and make violent love to her behind a plant in the hotel lobby.
You should have seen the looks my students gave me. SHOCKED, they were, the sweet dears. I had to stop the movie and explain to them what that mean in the 1940s.
Just did a search, I think this was the song:
A Knight and a lady went riding one day
far into the forest away, away
The Knight said oh lady pray have a care
this forest is evil beware beware,
A fiery red dragon it lay on the path
the lady wept sourly alas alas
The Knit slew the dragon the lady was gay
they road off together away away
WIN!
Hey! That’s my song!
I tawt I taw a puddy-tat! I did, I did tee a puddy-tat!
I tawt I taw anudder puddy-tat! I did! I taw TWO puddy tats!
Have you two puddy-tats met?
MEOWRRRR!
Ain’t I a stinker?
only when you hit my car after eating pokeberries or some other colorful fruit.
I am bored and I thought this was fun to do.
YOUR AGE BY CHOCOLATE MATH
1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to have chocolate (more than once but less than 10)
2. Multiply this number by 2 (just to be bold)
3. Add 5
4. Multiply it by 50 — I’ll wait while you get the calculator
5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1759. If you haven’t, add 1758.
6. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born.
You should have a three digit number. The first digit of this was your original number (i.e., how many times you want to have chocolate each week).
The next two numbers are YOUR AGE! (Oh YES, it is!!!!!) THIS IS THE ONLY YEAR (2009) IT WILL EVER WORK.
Really?
*does a few calculations on calculator*
*stares at calculator screen in wide-eyed shock*
*screams and runs out of room, terrified by numbers*
tsk.tsk Poor BFF. Try the calculator without the numbers. That’s what I did to beat it.
Because next year, you would need to use 1760 and 1759 at step 5.
I’m only 522 years old. *psst… if I start sparkling shoot me*
but you look loverly all sparkly and such.
If chez sparkles I am putting him on my fingers.
Rumor has it that might get crowded. How was the ceremony?
The right hand is free. It could use a sparkly or two or three….:D
As far as the ceremony … I don’t want to bore everyone to death. May I point you to the entries below?
Gack.
You guys need to read some adult vampire stories, stead o’ that teenie stuff. Try the “Dark Lover” series by J.R. Ward
If you’re looking for “adult” vampire stories, try Laurel K. Hamiltons stuff. The series doesn’t start off “adult” but it sure ends up that way! The later books seem to only have vampires by accident.
Yeah, I quit reading hers after the first few – like you said, it turned into little more than an excuse for sex, with an occasional vampire thrown in.
J.R. Ward’s books remain excellent stories, as are Jacqueline Frank’s “Nightwalker” series.
IMO, of course
(And seriously badly-written sex, at that.)
You couldn’t be more right about that!
I bought all L K Hamilton’s books and the last one – the eigth of the series is on pre-order. Now that the wedding is behind me, I can finally start reading books again.
Holy Hell!! Why does this work?
Does it assume you will pick the highest number available to you? I didn’t and now I’m old enough to have come over on the Mayflower.
I chose 2 for the number of times per week I desire chocolate. I’m not really a big fan of sweets. So it works with low numbers. This formula got my age correct, and the first digit of the three digit number you end up with at the end was right too!
*recalculates* That’s a little better. Sweets aren’t my favorite either, you can’t eat a lot before they start tasting awful. That’s your body saying “Do not want!!”
I just assume that when I crave a food (any food) it’s my body’s way of saying “there is something in this that I NEED!” Like when I start to crave red meat, I know it’s ’cause I need the iron or the protein.
I can’t ‘magine what it needs when I crave McDonald’s french fires though.
I think my body has a distinct lack of BEER right now.
I guess I’m lacking ice cream right now.
I appear to be suffering a severe shortage of chocolate caramel cake.
*drool*
*makes a beeline for the Strongbow cider*
*drool*
I’m still looking for a local supplier.
Nurse! Half a dozen Black Sheep, STAT! (clicky)
*drools*
Yep. That’s going around.
Geesh.
*attempts to move comment up underneath Brewski’s lack o’ beer comment*
*FAILs*
Mine doesn’t!
But then, I am something of a lush.
Avis!! Did you get a head start on your Friday?
Have one for me, okay?
Sure!
Head start? Um, my “job” is cleaning my folk’s place and my stepfather’s office. Beer makes the cleaning less… onerous.
(why doesn’t that word look right? spellcheck seems to think it’s ok, but it looks wrong somehow)
It’s only algebra. I wonder if they should teach it this way in schools, since it has such an impact.
Wow, that will really come in handy. I tend to forget how old I am.
*sneaks a peek at Judy’s driver’s license*
What’s that in dog years?
Song crotch fail.
dunno why I don’t have rosie odonnell’s face in my mind at this point… maybe I’ve short circuited.
“I love little pussy,
Her coat is so warm,
And if I don’t hurt her,
She’ll do me no harm.
So I’ll not pull her tail,
Nor drive her away,
But pussy and I,
Very gently will play.”
Those are the Lyrics =P.
Never knew this poem had been put to music.
“…her coat is so warm”
i guess if you’re in to that kind of thing
Hey Leila, how was the wedding?
Absolutely fabulous!!!
Thank you for asking. The weather was gorgeous and I nearly lost my breath when I saw my baby girl in her wedding dresses. I cannot wait to get the DVD from the photog. There were two of them for 8 hours. It will take four weeks and I feel that like Christmas, it’s never going to get here fast enough.
YAYY!! Where was the wedding anyway?
And have you seen wedinator(dot)com yet? I wanted so badly to tell you about the site, but wanted to wait until AFTER the wedding to do so!
Wedding was @ the resort in the Valley of the Sun aka Phoenix – our home. I will check out the website. Thanks!!!!
I thought you were the one who was getting married all this time.
*Confused look*
I did. I sneaked mine in last July. I didn’t want a wedding because I wanted all the focus on them.
Avis: clickie!!!!
Leila, it looks gorgeous…
I’m sure the day was perfect!
*back from looking at clickie*
Leila, will you adopt me?
LOL…what?
Well the brides family traditionally pays for the wedding…
No, Rooster and I are not that far in to things yet!
Awwwwwww, don’t be chicken!!
We’ve been dating for about six weeks. If that.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t that “six glorious, wonderful, hot, splendiferous, awesome weeks”?
But I was just attempting to be punny anyway…
Well, yeah, they have been!
*gooses WN*
That tickles!!!!!!!!
And I’m really happy for ya, Avis
GF and I had our first meetaversary August 10, and it’s a Wonderful Thing!
Well I met Rooster about 4 or 5 years ago… the dating part is recent!
You’re telling me!!! I am so broke I am going on a bread and water only diet for the next 5 years.
My own mother has promised me a ridiculous sum of money NOT to have a traditional wedding. My folks are divorced and that would make for an awkward event. My dad’s side of the family won’t understand (if the event should ever arise), but my view is that day won’t be about them.
It’s all about YOU babe!!! I had a lot of input with my daughter’s but only because she asked. I paid for it but it was all hers.
My daughter’s dad and I are divorced as well but we make a weird happy ex-family if that makes sense. I love his new wife, new son and his parents and siblings are still mine too.
I know better than to ask for my mother’s input. She’ll give no matter what, but I know what I want to do. Sorta. It’s the sorta thing I’ve been thinking about in loose terms for YEARS. Nothing specific, just ideas.
I’m sure the mother of the bride was breathtakingly beautiful! I remember way back when, you were asking advice on the blog about motb dresses, but not the usual kind. What did you end up with?
Judy, you are so sweet!!!
I found a dress I felt comfortable in. Even though it was sleeveless. I don’t like my back or arms exposed (I don’t know why) but the dress was gorgeous and I got many compliments on it. I will see if I can find a pic of it.
Clickie Judy. They no longer have the purple one like mine. I wore it with pewter shoes.
Oh, Leila, that dress is just lovely!
I am positive that you looked GORGEOUS!!!
Me too!
(btw, nice color change!)
Oh! Thanks! I’ve decided that since Judy and I are so alarmingly alike, that it would only be fitting to go back to avatars that are similar colors. And since blue looks so good on her, I decided to adjust mine!
You guys are just too kind.
…and thanks Avis.
…and
for thinking you were referring to the dress color change. *hides under desk*
It’s no big deal, there are much worse things that one could be embarrassed about.
*helps Leila back up*
Well, it was a bit arrogant on my part. LOL
…and thank you for helping me up.
*big squeeze* That dress is lovely, Leila. Congratulations on your wedding, and your daughter’s.
how did we even get to this??
Because I asked her about it.
ROFL!
Well it’s true!
YAY!! Leila is back!
*many squeezes*
I wish much happiness for you and your family.
Thank you DW!!
*ManySqueezesBack*
Couldn’t help chuckling anyways.
*Squeezes around all the Faipeeps*
Just needed to do that, spent yesterday recovering from being sick.
Flu Emp?
*sympatheticSqueeze*
The aftermath of a night of hard partying but I want my boss to believe I was sick so I started to try and believe it myself.
Um … you get sick from partying? Are you sure you are doing it right?
If I remember my younger years, he’s doing it just right. Of course, if I remembered my younger years I wouldn’t have been doing it right.
Do you age once you become a zombie?
More like decompose.
Of course zombies age, only unnatural things are saved from that fate. Oh wait …
Oh, and WB Leila!
Yea around the 24th shot I felt a bit woozy.
Yea it was quite the riot.
Hey, wait! You’re not old enough to drink!!!
And how did you manage to hide it from your family???
I’m new here and not so clever as all of you. But here is the lyrics to I Love Little Pussy:
I love little pussy,
Her coat is so warm,
And if I don’t hurt her,
She’ll do me no harm.
So I’ll not pull her tail,
Nor drive her away,
But pussy and I,
Very gently will play.
(1830 English Nursery Rhyme
attributed to Jane Taylor)
Those are the lines I always saw for this nursery rhyme, though I am not quite old enough to have learned them when they were originally written. I think the “Pussy will love me because I am good” version must have been a later edit. “Food” and “good” don’t rhyme in any dialect of English that I’ve ever heard.
The lyrics are;
I love little pussy,
her coat is so warm,
and if I don’t hurt her,
she’ll do me no harm,
I’ll sit by the fire,
and give her some food,
and pussy will love me…
because I am good!
It’s an childrens song first published over 100 years ago, I have a first edition of it in a book ‘Rhymes for Kindly Children’. When my son was little, I changed the pussy to kitty, just to keep up with the times!
now, all of you, get your minds out of the gutter!
What are the “Rhymes for Mean Children?”
snork-kitty
NEVER! We like our minds in there!
I have my own theme song now? Nice.
^ Tru’s post is win! Look at the posting time!
It was…. just over an hour ago. Your point?
Pointing is considered rude in some cultures.
*admires how Leila ♀ © gets right to the point*
I know a kid in my class who used to hit people who pointed at him. Or touched his neck.
Is this the one that got slapped a lot?
No, but he did have a few “meetings” with teachers after he stabbed someone with a compass. He doesn’t hit people who point at him now. He hits people who disagree with him.
I hope you have been feeding my finches Avis.LOL
Aaah, Beethoven…
Dude…That’s honesty win
Pfft. That’s the author’s connotations which fails here, not the song.
I do too!
“Her coat is so warm.” It’s a shame on how I see so many slang terms used for Smex :[ so it turns Nursery Rhymes like this into annoying joke fests. Thank goodness the FailBlog members will help prevent that :p
A hand in the bush is worth two in the…. never mind
who doesnt
Isn’t this the name of the song from Roman Polanski’s new movie?
Close; it’s an old classic but Roman went to France and obviously no one there could pronounce the sentences.
Found the lyrics. I found the last line amusing
I love little pussy,
Her coat is so warm,
And if I don’t hurt her,
She’ll do me no harm.
I’ll sit by the fire
And give her some food,
And pussy will love me
Because I am good.
wait… whats wrong in loving little pu55ies?
They say music reflects the true inner emotions of the composer…
This one is a really old song, there’s actually a version sung in a Loony Tunes episode in which Tweety sings it to Sylvester. I wish I could remember which episode… I think Tweety’s version may simply be “I love little kitty” etc. I also knew someone who had this song in a very old children’s book (they cut it out and used it in a piece of naughty collage art).
Maybe this is just me, but I don’t think it really counts as a ‘fail’ when at the time the song was written the wording was a quite innocent choice. The slang usage of the word ‘pussy’ to describe girlie bits wasn’t part of the dialect at that time. Yes, it is somewhat amusing from a modern standpoint, but calling this a fail would be like…calling the Latin word for the Genus classification of humans a fail. Yes, we may immaturely snicker over the word ‘homo’, but that doesn’t make it a fail.
Killjoy was here ^
This is a real kids song, no fails here. o.o; Didn’t you ever watch Bugs Bunny? Tweety sang this once or twice.
wait a minute…
they’re playing my song
excuse me but
that bartender just called you a homo
I have never heard or played that song. Even worse, I have never even seen where I get that song manuscript!
(I do not know whether or not it is a child’s song, but what I do know from the notes on that song manuscript is that the time signature of that song is 6/8 (jig) or 3/4 (waltz).)
Aw come on already, this is a very old song, you can’t hold it up to modern standards of slang. It’s like giggling when you see the word ‘Gay’ in a Charles Dickens novel, even though you know it means ‘Cheerful’.
I almost said I do too until I remembered the word little was in the title and then I got it! FAIL on my part too.
espacially with your name, the combination would show us what youve been dreaming about ^^
*especially* -_-”
How much ya wanna bet this was written during a MUCH more innocent era?
I’m sorry… Why is this a name fail? I see it as a WIN!! (Yes, I know… The song is about a _cat_, not pu**y. But, come on what a funny name.)
This is from the »comedy« show 12 oz. Mouse.
I was wondering if anyone would mention this… Thank you
It’s weird for a beginner’s piece to have 6/8 as the time signature.
Haha I’ve heard this song before! It features as the credits roll on the film Preaching to the Perverted. Interesting film, but the end is VERY wrong- and a nursery rhyme doesn’t soften the blow!
What’s new pussycat? Whoaaa whoaaa whoaaa oooooohhhh