Soliciting Fail
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Don’t call us, we’ll call you!
… and call you … and call you …
That has a ring of truth to it.
Justs repeats something in your head over and over again.
Have to pee… Have to pee… Have to pee… Have to pee. Have to pee… Have to pee…
Have to be… Have to see… have to three… have to tree…
Have a tea! *gives you tea*
Great. Now I have to pee…
But… Saltwaterfish dont pee! They only get thirsty due to osmose! Freshwater fish pee, but never pee. If you dont believe, you are dick. (Best. Argument. EVER!)
A majority of your posts, Mawcrow, are unfunny and uninteresting, and sometimes, like here, something inconsiderate and ugly.
Maybe you are right… I shouldn’t post while tired, and my bad english sometimes makes my bad jokes even worse… But the thing about fishes there is true. The latter part… I cant say anything to that…
Well, overall, just have to try a bit more. And overall, I am an idiot.
And the most important thing, I’m sorry for annoying. Im the kind of person who is happy when making others happy, so thats one of the worst things for me. I’m sorry.
If you are so dedicated to cheering people up, then why would you call fluffy a dick if she doesn’t agree with your opinion? It is a basic human right, the right to free speech.
Sorry, I didn’t mean it that way… It was just a bad joke, that i didn’t tell clearly enough. Actually now that i think i should have never wrote it. Its hard to remember that when reading, you cant decide from voice if other is serious or not… What the heck. Gottta remember to remove that kind of “jokes” before posting.
So, Mawcrow, I am going to take your statements here to mean you are open to constructive feedback. I hope you can find a way to have fun here that is also fun for others who read what you post. And I hope folks here are able to provide you useful indications of what they enjoy.
My opinion is, Macrow, is that, even though English is not your native language, you are trying to be funny and join in, and I appreciate your efforts. I cannot even try to understand how the intricacies of the English language – - especially slang – - would be hard for a non-native English speaker. And you are not a idiot.
Okay, hold on. I was in this same situation before, so I’m going to bust in here. I don’t know if you’re really a troll or not, because I used to be an accidental troll, but my opinion is, in order to get accepted, never start out posting on the regular’s blog. It takes a while to get used to their style of humor, so don’t call anyone a name if you think they will take it the wrong way. And that means, pretty much all of the time. Start joining in on some of the nighttime regular’s comments, and to start out, don’t try to make yourself the center of attention, just add a few comments here and there if you think it fits in with the pun-run or whatever. I’ll see if I can help you out this week or something. So everyone; just CHILL OUT!
people need to lighten up… mawcrow, keep being yourself, don’t let uptight clods spoil the fun.
those who try to impose their own personal order on the world are the bane of my existence… and drive me to incite chaos.
I think you have a tinnitus ear for this phonetic fun run.
Throw him in a cell.
A “cellar door” closure would sound euphonic about now.
(I think that was a euphemism for a final line land!)
It would certainly reduce his mobility.
… And his radar of spending.
Wow this is getting a little out of conrol lately. I don’t understand why fuzz on the concept wants to censor and control everything here. Yeah it’s not cool when trolls come here and crowd up the blog with stupid crap, and make fun of people, but nobody here has a right to shit on you for not liking your comment. If you don’t like something you read ignore it! If someone really is a troll that will piss them off the most….And about fearing the “regulars….the real regulars on here don’t call themsleves regualrs and could really give two shits about what you nazis think!
Second?
GODDAMNIT!
Do you have ANY IDEA what you’ve done?
You’ve made me lose the game. D:
which game? the lovegame or the saw game?
Aww… Now I lost the game.
THIRD
Homerun!
and the crowd goes wild
*man goes crazy and pulls someones arms off and is foaming at the mouth*
*the crowd desperatley tries to run away the the crazy man*
You worry me sometimes.
Ditto. Except, for me, it’s “always”, not “sometimes”.
I can understand that.
♫Tell me that you’re alright,
Yeah everything is alright.
Oh please tell me that you’re alright,
Yeah everything is alright.
Give me a reason to end this discussion,
To break with tradition.
To fold and divide.
Cause I hate the ocean, theme parks and airplanes,
Talking with strangers, waiting in line..
I’m through with these pills that make me sit still.
“Are you feeling fine?”
Yes, I feel just fine.♫
It’s a good word for your English vocabulary, though.
The word “solicit” was in past centuries used to mean “disturb or trouble.” It comes from the Latin sollicitare “to agitate,” which is in turn created from words meaning “shaken” (citus) and “entire” (sollus).
“Solicit” was a favorite word of the deconstructionist, Jacques Derrida, who liked to “shake” the presumed “wholeness” of words in order to show that words themselves are constructed things and are forever dependent on other words to mean what the mean.
And James Bond preferred his libations shaken not disturbed.
and “mean what the mean” means “mean what they mean”
(and “‘good grief’ means ‘bad grief’” ~ Rachel, age 4)
Thanks for the geography lesson?
Not only was that not a geography lesson, but you’ll notice, if you were paying attention, that he never once mentioned a specific location.
It was obviously a lesson about maths.
How do you get a normal avatar thingy? *cry*
You must go to the dark, shuttered brick building on the corner of 5th and 7th. Inside, you will find a long corridor, with 20 rooms. Enter the 14th room, and an old hag will await you after you sneak past the sleeping guardians, and ask you three personal questions. If you lie, she will, as a punishment, replace your sense of hearing with Celine Dion’s “My Heart will go on”. If you tell the truth, she will produce an picture for you. This will be your avatar.
Thank you.
Why does this happy face look mad? ->
>:(
Emphasis on “will”.
After she has shown you your future avatar, she will give you a “Petition Scroll”. You are required to keep this scroll safe during the long trek back to FailBlog, whereupon you shall ask for 25 signatures from Failblog regulars. All must be signed with a special pen.
Be happy. The process to change your avatar once you have one is even more tedious.
*snorekitty @BFF*
*snorekitty @ Shadow*
Yay!! It’s the snorekitty!
*pets the snorekitty gently so it doesn’t wake*
HAHAHA!
.
Of course, back then, in the early years when WE got our avatars, it was a lot more difficult.
@ʍʇɟ ızɐu ɹɐɯɯɐɹƃ: Go to the Gravatar website. All will be explained:
ht tp://en.gravatar.com/
It worked! I love you!
I think it did…
What nonsense! You should read even closer into Fuzz’s interesting post. It’s chock full of geology.
That’s chocking!
Ahhhh BFF (hiya)… but look to whom TMI Service was replying! Clearly this is a theological exercise!
That is awesome
Haha. FAAAIL.
Stupid trolls. There’s lots of them here. Somebody call the ban-hammer?
Seriously, I hope you are acting stupid, or damn this is sad.
So you’d better go back to your troll cave and leave this site alone…
are you replying on urself now?
Oh my. Talking to myself again…:(
It’s OK. A few days from now, it’ll just like someone got banned.
*has a look*
*likes what he no longer sees*
What?
if you solocitate we will be forced to shoot you!
When you solocitate, are you referencing yourself?
Solo-fights and wins…scary?
a self-pwn ticket
Hypocrisy: You’re doing it right!
Maybe those working girls use his doorstep as a base. *shrugs*
Basis of stairs?
That’s why they’re call girls. *hugs*
So they can hooker folks in to that sale. Some people actually get it too. *mugs*
Just be careful what you get in to with the pre-paid option. *bugs*
Now you tell me! *jugs*
I’ll take care of ‘em for you! *slugs*
Hur dur hurst
Tobb, this video is stupid and obnoxious, and we don’t want it here. If you post it again, I will ask Ben and Emily to ban you. Go spam someone else’s blog.
ummm I think you have repeater syndrome.LGB
Oh no, there was an video (the breaking ice one). Apparently it was removed allready.
Nope, there was a nesting error. The stupid vid is still there. More’s the pity.
Tobb, this video is stupid and obnoxious, and we don’t want it here. If you post it again, I will ask Ben and Emily to ban you. Go spam someone else’s blog.
LGB, I’m afraid Tobb has been doing this for months, in fact. He’s probably resceived hundreds of threats, crude comments and complaints, but they are of no avail.
BFF, I emailed Ben & Emily about the troll who was spamming the blog with the “Internet Loser” video and they got rid of his posts. Is it not a permanent solution?
Unfortunately, it’s not. But we can keep reporting him/her every time they do it. Eventually it’ll be too much of a hassle for him/her to post the stupid videos. I hope.
Rooster?
Well, at least they have no one to blame.
There’s always ‘God’s will’.
.
Oops, I just set myself up as one to flame.
Oh, sweet irony:
A telemarketer on
the “do not call” list.
*dons super sexy wet-looking bathing suit with more skin showing than bathing suit and very high heels*
*holds up “Woo-Hoo Shadow” card overhead while prancing around in circle*
Random cop.
(clickie!)
what’s a stage doing out here?
I once had a noisy pee when I had a telemarker on the phone once and
it p i ss ed them off. They said it was rude I said well its rude for you to call me at home and except me to answer or buy from you when its inconvenient for me LOL.
A friend of mine once did something similar to this. Left the telemarketer speechless.
If you REALLY can’t get a better job than telemarketing, you have my sympathies. But not enough to make me stay on the line or buy the stupid product. Consider cashiering. Or hog rendering.
I’ve done similar things to the Jehova’s Witnesses that used to come to the door, years ago. My father invites them in and tries to convert them. It’s kinda fun to watch.
I love doing this! I once gave a Mormon a copy of the Tao Te Ching. The expression on his partner’s face was priceless!
The quickest way to permanently get rid of the Jahovees is to invite them in to talk about Mormonism. They tell all their friends.
My sorta step-grandad sorta, he used to talk and talk to keep them on the line. After 20 minutes or so, they’d ask for his details to complete the sale and he’d say something like “No thank you but it’s been lovely chatting”. He got bored at home and liked amusing himself this way.
I bought some silly voucher ticket for a hundred bucks last week, because I once knew a guy who was a telemarketer and it was a sh it of a job. Mostly I just ask ‘em to take me off the list.
Now… religious zealots who knock on the door of my house… now they’re fair game!
*headdesk* Sorry jam, that came across all holier than thou – apols, not intended, of course *squeeze*. When my step-mother was home alone, she sometimes got bored too, and she would… wait. No, sorry, that was gonna be just wrong too *blush*.
Is it just the angle, or is the “absolutely NO SOLICITING” sign’s lettering really larger than the “National Association of Telemarketers” lettering? If so, LOL.
Perhaps the telemarketers were beset by attorneys, AKA “solicitors.”
I wonder why it is so silent?
Failblog is always quiet on the weekend. And more so now, because this is a holiday weekend for us Canadians. Hopefully more FBers stop by!
*stops by to say hello*
Hello
*continues to look for brains*
You do not eat your failfriends. You do NOT eat your failfriends!!
*comes back*
I’m looking for humans that are not my failfriends so I may feast up the brains. *mouth drools*
*continues to search for non-failfriends humans’ brains*
I’d recommend the trolls, but it’s brains you’re looking for, so they’re not really an option.
ZA eats the troll brains… But he definitely does not enjoy it. I believe their brains are made of something resembling fecal matter? But you’d have to ask ZA. He’d know better.
I think he does it more as a public service than anything else.
He should be awarded a medal for his bravery in actually consuming the brain of a troll. Who knows what disturbing, psychopathic matter lies in a troll’s cranium?
HEY CHAN HAPPY OUR THANKSGIVING.
GO CANADA!!!
woo
They want you to call before you knock.
But line is always busy.
…the… …the line… I need to go to bed.
THEN WHO WAS LINE????
couldn’t resist i’m sorry. I apologise profusely for that.
Happy thanksgiving all, or Columbus day.
So the story goes like this: When the first zhoggnos(people who come from the big water) landed they where sick so the natives had some turkey they had just killed for regalia and food.(Since they all had scurvy). They got better and celebrated from there on in. But what the natives should of did was give them a donkey……. they we would be getting a piece of ass on this day instead of turkey. LMAO.
But….isn’t scurvy cured by eating fruit? Or am I wrong….
Ummm… What if I said you needed some special “ingredients” to cure scurvy?
Yes fruit or white cedar. the turkey was the main meal LOL.
I have deep feelings of sadness about Europeans’ treatment of native peoples in recent centuries. But it is a healthy and helpful thing to take the time to be conscious of what there is to be thankful for in being alive. In that spirit, great happy thanksgiving to you and yours. _()_
Yes in order to heal one must know of the injury to treat it and that time is coming. To know of the medicines one must know of the person who is to be cured. Great thanksgiving to you and yours Dave. May we honour the elders and the young.
Jehova’s Witnesses also do not allow solicitation. I always found that ironic.
wow. hipocrites… :cP
*sad* :c( oh noes… the moderators…. :c(
hide me…
*5 eagles spreads his wings* hey Tofu hide under here?
When I grow up, I want to be a principal or a caterpillar!
That’s some high hopes. Maybe you should just stick to becoming president or an astronaut.
Why a caterpillar?
Because a dogerpillar would be silly?
Does a caterpillar hold up the roof in a catacomb?
Not sure, but I wonder if a honey holds up the roof in a honeycomb?
(its from the sipsons) lol!
The
dog
and
pony
went
grazy.
Adam and Jamie…
Made asplode a C4…
donkey
F UCKYOU!
i dont get what the fail is…..
OH TEH IRONY
pot… meet kettle…
“Is anybody alive out there?!?!?”
Hi~
Aannii JUdy.
I’m not alive *hungers brains*
No. The swine flu hit harder and faster than expected.
lol.. look at the abbreviation… NAT.. priceless
this has a little fail
What kind of cryptic fail is that? Seriously, I might be a stupid noob at recognizing a fail, but this is just not comparable to other obvious fails. For me, this is clearly a fail fail.
Ya know this is just wrong on sooooooooo many levels
this is one of the best FAILS ever, i don’t even publish my phone number anymore because of these telemarketing people.
LOL, not just no soliciting, absolutely NO soliciting!!!
Solicit the solicitors
I had a friend who was arrested for soliciting.
It’s a good thing they’ve got the blinds closed–heaven knows what they’re up to in there! (And I wouldn’t want to be interrrupted by a door-to-door salesman in the middle of *ahem* THAT, either!)
Do as we say, not as we do!!
Where is this? This is one door that I want to knock on.
This is right by my house!! Too funny whoever posted this!
Yeah, Irony WIN
Irony win! XD
I can’t find a “National Association of Telemarketers” anywhere on the web. Does this organization even exist? Is this a joke?