House Fail
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Let’s face fake facts — that’s a big façade.
Yarp
It looks so two-dimensional… I wonder why?
Let’s column and find out.
I’m sure they are pillars of the community.
Bollards!
This is the kind of pretentious fronting that torus apart in 1860.
Of all the effrontery! Guards! Take him away!
I’m stumped as to why they built it.
With all of that base antebellum feeling, they could not see their southern exposure needed better backing.
Or they see a need to maintain a facade in front of their neighbours.
Well in countries like Laos, Cambodia, Vietnam, Burma, and Thailand credit may be hard to aquire and if they are approved, interest rates may be 50% -100% just for a house loan versus 5%-10% in the U.S. So these people will often save money for years instead of getting a load and then build parts of their of home that they could afford within their generation while their kids build the rest of it. Many in my family have houses that look like mansion in the US with only wages of $200 a year but realized that these house may have taken 50+ years or alot of luck and hard work to get that big.
I told you, that was NOT my fault!
^ a donut did not
I thought it was a swell projection.
you guys used to be funny
cuz its from soviet russia? btw,
im america, you always blow on hot food.
im soviet russia, food blows you.
I have started to consider cannibalism. Females only please.
no fat chicks
no homo
They obviously didn’t want people to see their dirty laundry.
*wish I knew some house puns
*
you don’t know any? time for you to get cooking.
Maybe it is Lupus……
it’s NOT lupus!
Bingo!
Yahtzee?
Sorry.
*puts a Mediterranean style house on Mediterranean Avenue*
*buys-up all the railroads and utilities*
*flicks fuzz’s Mediterranean style house off Mediterranean Avenue*
Sorry. We have a strict HOA rules — no Grecian architecture is allowed. Perhaps you’d care to build on Illinois Avenue?
*swaps └Ï╥╚ ε Girl an airline for a railroad*
WN! What are you doing here? I mean … erm … how lovely to see you!
Good to see you too, └Ï╥╚ ε Girl – may I interest you in a subway system?
*hands └Ï╥╚ ε Girl another ╥ *
Thanks. Um … really … you didn’t have to do that …
A subway system? What would I need that for?
Well, you may have to enter into a fierce but terrifying bidding war with 5 eagles/high5/1finches/1fox/1cats/1vole/owl/caterpiller/1femur – I couldn’t wait all day, so I’ve offered it to him for a femur.
That’s not a pun, it’s a cliche. (Yes, it should have the little accent over the “e”, but I can’t be bothered bring up Character Map)
And it’s not a palindrome, either. The palindrome of Bolton would be Notlob.
*pbbbbbttttt
my diagnosis — k@’s post is more cachet than cliché and deserves claret
*toasts on the house*
Concept caught in custardy cuddle?
*joins toast*
lol … you’ll get no battle from me
*opens another bottle on the house, um, front*
yeah yeah yeah
Im underage! …Got some Pepsi Max?
(yeah, already drank 1.5 liters of it today…)
no no no
Time for rehab!
and here I thought the only palindrone was “drill, baby, drill.”
actually it would be boltonotlob. Palindromes are the same forwards and back…. you cant spell a word backwards and call it a palindrome… its just a backwards word.
drow.
Dark Elves?
I think fuzz was spelling “word” backwards, but I just wanted to say <3 you Drizzit!! Smoochies for the sexy killing machine!
emordnilap.
Go hang a salami, I’m a lasagna hog.
WOW! It’s a proper palindrome.
Lol, that’s my favorite palindrome, from Al Yankovich’s song Bob.(clickie)
Here’s another:
Oozy rat in a sanitary zoo.
Hehehe, I remember a thread a while back where MRN, myself and others did a whole bunch of them.
I ended up cheating because it’s quite hard to be original.
Poop!
Lol.
[sarcastic voice]Well, isnt that original![/sarcastic voice]
“Fool an emote to men aloof ! “
Ah, hadn’t heard that one. I knew this one:
A man, a plan, a canal, Panama!
madam, I’m Adam.
A Toyota’s a Toyota.
Dammit, I’m Mad!
Was it a car or a cat I saw?
“Fool an emote to men aloof ! “
Well, i posted this above, but no one responded… *sob*
I made it myself a moment ago, so im happy! Yay!
*dances*
Cigar, toss in a can, is so tragic.
Figured most here would miss the Monty Python reference. See Dead Parrot Sketch.
lol Dr. Eric Foreman
I believe that’s a mullet-era home! BUSINESS IN THE FRONT PARTY IN THE BACK!
or Beverly Hillbillies wannabes
this is not the fail your looking for
wordplay !!!!
Does my butt look big in this?
No, definitely not I am sorry, but it looks a little shabby, prehaps sir would like something in our Tudor range?
k@, that answer was a whitewash. (Hey, I just column as I see ‘em.)
Your butt doesn’t look big enough babe. Try that hot little ranch number. Not the split level!
yes
you have a big butt
I cannot lie
when you shake it
pokes out my eye.
HEEEEY! IM BAAAAACK!
……..Whoops. Did i butt in wrong time?
Just SQUEEZE it in DrB, as long as the attic is full you can fudge your bottom line.
*Good to see you again.*
ohhhhh
its one of those houses
hmmmmmm
rfol
…why would you do something like that o.o
I didn’t! Don’t blame me.
If you’re looking for someone to blame, blame Arthur.
Arthur erected this extension?
Actually, I think he extended this erection.
*raises eyebrow*
Ahem.
*raises… umm, never mind*
There was a 50/50 chance you’d see this thread and 9 times out of 10, you do.
One time’s as good as another.
I’m omnipresent, more than half of the time.
You didn’t see what I just did in the men’s room, did you?
Don’t worry, accidents happen to all of us. Maybe not three times in a row, but it’s okay.
*sob!*
I can’t find any replacement ceiling tiles!
Didn’t he say he couldn’t help it? Something about the pills not wearing off…
has it been more than 4 hours?
Call House, STAT … and k@.
My diagnosis…..a baseball bat!
¡magine that!
a k@ in the hat comeback
yeah, but that was like 4 or more days ago. I guess he’s raising partial houses to help? A bit too kinky for my taste.
“The Ray’s decided to maintain their home after the devastating storm, no matter what was left. My father built these columns, it’s only right we leave them up. But my husband? He can’t build sh!t.”
Your butt looks great shame about the face lol
Aaahhhh… so this is what happened to Obama’s podium.
Soooo, like… do we call this a double wide? Triple wide? Quatro?
Does it come with wheels? Can I borrow it?
I think it folds. You should put your name on the list, there’s a schedule.
Well, it’s somewhat Roman looking, so it could be a II-wide or an III-wide. Not big enough to be an IV-wide.
thanks. I’ll be sure to X out that thought.
X-IV, good buddy.
What’s your X-XX?
.
Woah!! That’s X XX alright!
ooo!! Brewski’s making thirty innuendo.
Quick! Somebody call IX I I!
Reminds me of a mullet.
All business in the front and a party in the back?
*burns invitation*
business in front, fun in the rear
doh!
*burns that invitation, too*
Judy’s burnin’ down the house.
Im back!
*gets trapped in flaming house*
And I was gonna bring my bracelet
If that is no win i don’t know…
You know that I know that you don’t know this no win.
And you know that I know that you don’t know this is a no-win.
know know know
what a know-how, or rather know-hoe?
Ionic ironic.
The people who built this are dorics.
Corinth & Ian, I know them well!
(Tus)Can you introduce me to them? I hear they are capital people.
*holds the word “iconic” up to FotC’s original post, to see how it looks*
It’s all greek to me…
Its all geek to me…
Slips an ‘ on previous post…
“Halfway through the renovation, the production team of Extreme Home Makeover and the local people who came out to help, decided they hated the owners and left the scene.”
Geeky greek?
Actually, I like it! Where can I get one?
wal mart.
they have everything but what you need.
Clearly, the facade was built before the financial crisis.
Cost overruns!
First!
Yes. Yes, you are. You can cross that off today’s to-do list.
Ooohhhh!!! Here you go Girl. I found this “Little” between the couch cushions this morning and couldn’t for the life of me figure out where it came from.
Thanks! Now, if only Shadow would return my “Blue,” I’d be set!
*looks at name*
Um, GS? Are you sure this is my “Little”?
Well I know it’s not mine. You may need to dust all the lint and crumbs off of it.
Hi guys! How are you this fine Wednesday?
Apparently GS has some explaining to do about how many “littles” he has in his couch.
Hiya, Brewski! I’d be fine, except Shadow stole my “Little” and “Blue” yesterday. GS found this “Little” in his couch, but my “Blue” is still missing. How are you?
*squeezies*
Your “Blue”, you say? Gee, I have no idea where that might have gone…
*stares innocently at ceiling*
*would have preferred “Blueski”*
*squeezies*
You look good in blue.
Um…
*decides against dirty-minded reply*
Thought that one ↓ was dirty enough, eh?
I guess I blue my chance.
I need one of these
Yah gotta get yourself some marble columns!
That was probably purchased at Mike’s Marbleoplois
Who lives there, the pope?
The Potemkins.
nice face but the back door looks like its been hammered
and you really have to arch your back to get inside
They also put lipstick on their pig.
so cruel, yet so sexy, yet so delicious
a pig in a portico
a porcine pergola
A silk porch out of a sow’s rear?
You pork, you peccary.
*purses lips*
Potbellied payola for the pocketbookie?
A pork barrel swinedler living high on the hog?
That house is like a metaphor for capitalism!
Like it’s a metaphor for like, um, a metaphor.
whoa, that’s really meta
Meat? Where? Yay!
*dances*
(unzips trousers )
Is this the original Acropolis in Athens? And is Zeus home?
rofl This is kind of a win
LAST!
No. No, you’re not. You can’t cross that off today’s to-do list.
But keep trying, buddy!
does the woman with the’’skirt fail” live here???
This isn’t fail. This is an epic win. The Failblog people are just jealous that they don’t have a better house.
In fact, I’m getting disappointed with the quality of the fail around here. I’m starting to think they’re just picking random pics from the voting page.
You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends, but you can’t pick your friend’s nose.
Congrats on your achieving >ZAP!< Dot Org!!
What >zap< mean? LGB and WhoeNellie. By the by you two are like the columns of fail blog .
“Achieving”? Yes. Yes, that’s what I did. I achieved >ZAP!< Dot Org! How good of you to notice.
What are you achieving in a zap thingy
*zaps LGB*
It is ALL about ‘Curb appeal’ people!
Redneck win!!
Lmao, I do wan’t that for my barn ^-^
hello alllllll llllllll
lllllll lllllll
lllllll lllllll
lllllllllllllllllllllllllllll
lllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll
Are those femurs?
No I was trying to build columns I no do so good.
Hey I got 1 femur to trade with something you got?
*looks around*
Can I interest you in a subway system? └Ï╥╚ ε Girl hasn’t responded yet.
*pulls out femur*
I will take that subway system for even trade.
What will you give for a chinchilla? He ate my laptop power cord.
Pesky varmit!
IMHO that’s an overwhelmingly big WIN!
Any of you play Ultima Online after they allowed you to design your own homes. This is the IRL version of that.
it looks like Andrew Jacksons house in Nashville
Okay, I’m setting a disturbing trend of talking about the fail. Does anybody know what this really is? I’m guessing a movie set or something?
Why would they need any kind of house behind the facade? I’m guessing it’s someone who brags, but doesn’t have enough money to do it right.
Maybe started out with big plans then ran in to overruns. Maybe they are made of wood and concrete facid.
This is the front entrance I mentioned earlier. The one I save for nobility.
OMFG wow i passed thru this house for like 10 times… seriously… this is from the Philippines, and they say it was supposed to be a municipal hall or sumthin, but with lack of budget, was never completed. we get a good laugh everytime we pass by…
A desultory philippinic.
though this is not from manila, but down south in bukidnon, mindanao.
Chocolate or manila? Or a swirl?
The Philip-I-know doesn’t indulge in such island bling.
In Marikina and Paco, slums have a facade like that so that visiting foreigners won’t see the back.
Only in da Philippines.
YES! On Bohol, right???
I was there and remember this house
You mean to say that no one mentioned the breast augmentation reference that this just begs for. I mean put a nice front on an old piece of crap, and voila, plastic surgery, homestyle.
If this is real, why is the outbuilding at far right of the second photo not visible in the first photo? I’m not calling fake, just trying to understand why the perspective doesn’t seem to match.
They’re taken from different angles. To get to the second angle, the photographer probably had to move to the right (as we see it) more, allowing the house on the right to be in the picture. He was too far over left in the first photo for the house to be in the picture.
Looks like they’re all coming back, I saw most of those pictures that are now making the front page only a few days ago.
My porch is bigger than your house.
Or, to roughly quote Caddyshack, “My dingy is bigger than your entire boat!”.
Looks can be decieving.
I don’t call that a House fail but a cladding win!
hey that’s my house, u can come and drink some tea =)
Oh, so that’s what Madoff did with the money.
This is an actual house, I’ve seen it and I took a picture of it for its awesomeness. This is located in Vietnam, on the main bus road between Saigon and Dalat. If I remember correctly, it’s about 3 hours out of the main city and isn’t near any other buildings except for shanty homes. Which is why it stands out even more
This is like a mullet – win in the front, fail in the back.
jim heckel…
remember the inbred retardo mullet…or the frullet on mulletsgalore.com (RIP)…………..I hate every single ounce of you James Heckel. You sir are a bitch
Okay, so is it in Vietnam or the Philippines? Seems that we have some conflicting information….
That’s Priority Fail! ^^
it’s built so they can continue to add later. Bad taste, certainly, but why build small when you can expand over time.
Maybe it’s a take on a Potemkin village! (Explanation: Empress Catherine the Great of Russia wanted to be sure her subjects were doing well. The corrupt boyars didn’t want her to find out many of them were living in squalor, because she’d throw money at the poor and the boyars would get less. So when Catherine felt like stepping out on a tour, her advisor Potemkin would map out a route for her and make sure that the fronts of the houses on the route were fixed up nice, with smiling, waving peasants wearing their Sunday best. Catherine thought her subjects were doing much better than they really were.)
2 words put together as one…. PHOTOSHOP
That’s in Eastern Europe, for sure! And the owner is gipsy. The picture is not photoshopped. And also, please note the little wooden shed in the left of the first picture: that’s the toilet (NOT kidding!)
This home has great curb appeal, but still has plenty of room for improvements to increase you investment value!
Yes! On Bohol right???
I was there years ago and remember this house on the road to Jagna
yeah thats common in india
This is a “win.” Fail blog, you’ve been posting “wins” as “fails” lately!
working as intended = win… not fail… FAIL FAIL!
the rest is on layaway
I ended up cheating because it’s quite hard to be original.
this looks like that denver speech that obama gave before he was elected with the roman columns.
i swear i saw a house just like that in the rural area of the Philippines… My grandmother has one like it, but it looks more like a chruch…
WIN!!!!!!!
What’s wrong with putting an innacurate scaled-down replica of the whitehouse in front of a condemned shack in the middle of a field of knee-high weeds next to a barn?
Now Thats Curb Appeal!
what this is a WIN!