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It’s Morbid Mistress’ section of DW shop.
There are far to many X’s in that alphabet.
If Fox adds any more X’s to their masthead, they will have to rename themselves as Gray’s or Tortora’s or Grabowski’s or some other similar text. All the guys would pass with straight A’s! Just think of the possibilities.
WHOO HOO SEX ED XD
Damn, in my times they used to teach math.
First thing I thought of was Debra LaFave and this all made sense
First thing I thought was my 5th grade student teacher, Ms. Libby.
Oh, how I long for those days when mini-skirted student teachers were a common sight.
god I wish those were MY teachers
You mean “AA,A,B,C,D,DD…”
nooooo… everyone knows it goes “a, a, a; b, a, b, b bie bippy boe. …”
No, No, No. Must Prof. Moe have to constantly repeat himself?
B A bay, B E bee, B I Bippy bi, B O bo, bippy bi bo B U bu bippy bi bo bu.
headache…lol
SECOND!!!!
sloppy?
I’m a pirate.
you have a woman’s hands
I bet those hands have never….
handled some booty? Arrrrr
you are gonna be so busted!
Tit for tat?
or tatters for titters
X – marks the spot!
)x(
delight in the middle of the Y
)Y(
(.)(.)
Now we know who plunders the treasure box!
Whoa.. Hot for teacher…
Oh the methods these days to cope with ADD addled children….
with teachers like this (or teaching materials like these), there is no attention deficit. Might still be some hyperactivity, but no loss of attention. Cure for the ADD disease?
Don’t you mean A-double D?
Looks like a WIN to me, good materials.
*check*
Oh HELL YA!!!
Wait…
*looks under Leila’s bed* Hey! That one’s mine!
I’ve no clue how it got there.
Pictures? I keep and album of Ms B pictures under my bed.
dropkicks a “d” for jules
I used to have several albums of Ms B’s, but then I bought them all on CD and got rid of my turntable.
Teacher created materials?? Ummm “The hip bone is connected too?? We better check the textbook
If teacher were this hot, I would never have cut class!!
probably biology?
Sex ed. Duh.
anatomy and physiology, chapter 12.
I majored in that field in my early teen years.
*squeeze!*
That one was mandatory for most teen boys.
Someone forced you to?
Well, if you want to call hormones “someone”.
Ah okay, that sounds familiar. I was wondering, because there was definitely no need to force me in my teen years.
Aah, a fellow scholar of the art of self satisfaction. *tips hat* Professor, wasn’t it you who wrote the inspiring book “The Watermelon. An introduction to its multiple uses”?
No, my graduate thesis was on Pillow Humping and its many Therapeutic and Social Benefits.
Have you two read Peaches are for Everyone? Excellent training tool. A best seller too!
What? They are set books……oh that is not a t!
Welcome to Merv’s Joke Shop.
I need a lesson from this teacher…?
Punish me! I deserve detention!
Mal!
*pounce!*
Stand in that corner and bend over!!!!
*HeartySqueezeForMal*
Comment waiting moderation.
*HeartySqueezeForMal*
*supah “sorryIbeenawayforsolong” squeeze*
See you in detention Brew! *smirk*
Oh, so you two are into the group thing eh?
Hmmmmm
Still came thru however. Wish it didn’t. Hehe!
*THWACKS Brew’s hand with ruler a la catholic school*
NO CHEATING!!!!!
That’s an old FB meme-for-moderation — there was an (in)famous user named “gasman” who was a bit of an instituion. Pretty much anything anyone said, he found a way to “turn around” their comment with the reply …
Bènd over and I’ll show you a _____!.
The mods apparently finally got fed up with it.
I have a strange feeling that I’ll regret you posting that info…
naaaaahhhh…
lmaooo…sounds like fortune cookies; read fortune and add “____ in bed”
They still print adult material on paper?
Yes, I think this is an exhibit from the Smithsonian. These were called magazines, I believe. Crazy, isn’t it?!
Forgotten fact: Many were printed monthly! Wild right?
Its made for people that think that 28.8 and the post office are fast enough
You need a target. Hitting the computer screen is sooo messy.
*runsawaywithaquickness*
but there’s still nothing like burying your nuts in some real…good…reading material
*hides in bookshelf*
Like Pu$$ in Boots??
The Owl and the Pu$$y…cat
The Hard-on Boys
Where the Wild Thongs Are
Mother Goosed
The princess and the pea-ness
Paddington Pedobear
The Berenstains Bare
The little engine that came
Jack and his Beanpole
Jack and his beanstalk.
Ha! GMTA
& fools never differ
*squeeze*
Goldy and the 3 bears (as is)
*squeeze*
Pan’s Peter
Fox in knee high socks
Little Miss MUFFet
Guess how much I’ll love you
*snork!*
I like the second one better.
Captain Underpants
(no change required)
Black Beauty
(no change required)
Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm.
3 billy’s goats like it ruff
Little Red Hood Riding
“Oh my! What big … you have!!”
yes. yes, they do. amazing stuff, the new paper. even absorbs the sticky stuff so that mommy never knows what you are doing.
A is for Ass
B is for Boobs
C is for Crotch shot
D is for Do Me
E is for Erotica
E is for Erotic
If you insist..
E is for Eating at the Y
F is for felching
*runs away*
G is for grope
H is for Hymen
I is for Insert.
J is for Juggs
Jugs are WAY different than Juggs
K is for custard fairies.
Only Naomi knows for sure.
J is for jennytal
*sends granny to corner*
Here are some racy DVDs to watch while you are in time out. Do not come back till you learn how to spell jennytal.
*sulks in the corner*
*spanks the phonics monkey*
“S H …..sh….sheizer”
*click! click!*
*download*
*attach*
*send!!*
K is for Kinky!
L is for licking
M is for Muff Diving
M is for munting.
*throws up*
P.S. In case u don’t know what it means, good. WARNING: Do not look it up! May cause serious trauma!
omgomgomg…curiosity killed the cat big time. Can’t un-read!!! Think I barfed in my throat a little…
N is for Nipples
*^5 k@. I couldn’t bring myself to type the M*
M is for meticulous masturbation makes miracles manageable
O is for “Oh” face. You know what I’m talking about! Oh! Oh!
*makes a note*
P is for pumping! (didn’t expect that did you!)
Q is for quickie.
Q is for Queef
R is for rimming! (oh good grief
)
R is for Rumpy Pumpy!
S is for STD
U is for Underage.
V is for Variety (it is the spice of life)
W is for (the inevitable) w*nking
Y? Because we like it!
Y is for Yours, as in show me “yours”?
Nice ‘ending’ Brew!!
Z is for zipless f*ck. What? That’s what the Urban Dicitionary says!
Z is for zesty!
Now I know my ABC’s
You’ll think I am an S.O.B
Sex Obsessed Badger?
Sexually Overcharged Bunny!
Win!
Soiled Orangutan Boinker?
Smelly Onion Boob
“Slightly”?!?!
is “slightly” for when a person is only half-faced?
OK, suspiciously, strongly, stoutly, salaciously, superbly your choice!
Slightly, meant as at the point before strongly….
Supremely!
Shagadelic, baby!!
Skratdaddy Owns Biatches
*applauds the thread*
or fisting!
*runs after K@*
Fox Magazine??? C is for Cottage Cheese Thighs.
B is for Bend over.
What happened to your “ski”?
I loaned it to LGB. She was going to hit the slopes, but I think one ski didn’t do the trick.
Loaned it? Usually she just ‘takes’ without asking? Is she okay?
Well, I was going to just slalom, but I rummaged around in Brew’s pants when he wasn’t looking and found an ‘i’ and an ‘s’. They worked great!
Speaking of which, I could use those back! They’re…well… kinda an important part of me!
Here’s a question, how did LGB get the extra ‘i’ if you weren’t wearing pants?
*hands ski back to Brew*
Thanks for the loan!
Hooray! I’m whole again!
*squeezes*
I thought LGB said Salome – while I was scanning down the page
That’s no way to get ahead.
Behind then?
They must be textbooks for the class that kid was taking when his mom sent him a stripper.
failblog.org/2009/07/17/birthday-win/
Which stripper – exotic cougar jade, britney amber, covergirl giselle or the banged brook taylor?
when a mommy bird and a daddy bird love each other very much get get certain urges to have rough skat group orgies, clean up on isle 3, dirty sanchez, blumkin action…..oh wait….wrong book.
“Confessions of an Asian Foot Goddess”?!?!
What the…
Oh the possibilities…
they seem to have left out the bit about trannys
That’s covered in the next grade level.
On a :[ note, I wonder what the parents think of their daughters who are in this line of business. My baby models and if I ever find that she … GRRRRR!!! AAAAACK!!!!
*mind asplodes at thought*
I would kill her and the one who photographed her and pretty much everyone who would lay eyes on her.
*noms of butter cow*
♫ My blood runs cold! My memories have just been sold! Angel’s in the centerfold! ♫
*bites Brew*
Now, now, Leila. We must not nom our Fail Friends.
*hands Leila Spam Cookie™*
Here, this should tide you over until lunch.
*flees room*
Sheesh! Who let all these flees in the room?
*steps in front of Leila and makes “STOP” motion with hand*
Not so fast, young lady!
*hands “Cease and Desist” order to Leila*
There.
Aaah! Medic!
*stops to give Brew bandaid*
AAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!! 
*ApologySqueeze*
*flees room*
Have you been hanging out too much with BondFan lately?
*scrutinizes list of people who like Spam Cookies™*
1. Jenny
2. WhoaNellie
3.
fuzzI know that Leila doesn’t care much for Spam Cookies™, but I’ve never seen that reaction from her. Interesting.
*makes interlineation to list*
Spam is usually not very appealing to vegetarians.
Or omnivores, for that matter.
:ick:
I grew up on spam. I guess that’s what you have to do when you need to feed 8 kids.
I hereby propose that we, the FAILblog Regulars, invent Authentic FB Vegetarian SPAM™
Spam, Blergh.
*spits into spitoon* *ting
Veggy seal of disapproval confirmed.
*gak
Omni seal of disapproval also confirmed. :ick:
Can you believe, I’ve never tried it?
oooooooooooh, what you’re missing!!!
Try it fried and eat it like a burger.
We usually had it sliced and fried, in substitution of breakfast meats.
While I have no desire to have Spam again personally, I can see people eating it in a sandwich or as a breakfast meat. But cookies????? I’d be equally grossed out by Ham cookies, or bologna cookies.
I live in Spamtown USA! If you ever drive through southern MN, hit up the Spam Museum in Austin.
It was just a joke, GS. One day the blog was being unmercifully spammed by a couple of idiots. There was so much of it, I made Spam Cookies. Voilà! The popular snack food was born!
I know LGB, I’m just having a little fun giving you a hard time about them.
*squeeze*
Oh. Well. You know how much I like a hard time.
*specialthursdaysqueezyforGS*
Well, a hard man is good to find. Or so they say.
I thought that has changed since Little Pill Blue?
I find people’s reactions to this ubiquitous mystery meat fascinating. Of course, a vegee/omni would never touch the stuff, but the fear and loathing that this canned “meat” product inures even in meat eaters is positively palpable. How in the world does it survive?
It’s consumed by people who can’t afford real meat? I don’t know. I know my parents bought it all the time.
The thing is, I priced it recently (just for fun), and it’s actually kind of expensive as canned meats go. Also, you don’t get much of a serving, so no leftovers. Perhaps it used to be a bit cheaper….
I actually like it in a sammich, fried – and it has casserole possibilities.
You just don’t wanna eat too much of it…
It hasn’t been that “cheap” for the past 20 years, actually. At least in the states.
Why do you keep trying to eat me???
*sniff, sniff*
Well, it would definitely make biology classes more fun!
Wasn’t there a teacher several years back that got in trouble for posing naked in a magazine? The school district was trying to fire her and she was suing because the pictures were taken before she started teaching.
I dunno – sounds familiar…
*shrugs*
I don’t understand what all the fuss is about. These are quality resource books. Any good teacher knows that students need visual aids in order to learn better.
You can get visual AIDS too now?
*throws stack of ‘resources’ away*
Result from optical paper cut maybe?
I don’t know, but that’s my kind of curriculum. XD
It has to be anatomy class…
They never taught this in class.
But they do occasionally teach it behind the stage curtain.
Yes, but I always did my homework anyway.
*Snork*
Did you do the extra credits like me?
3 for $8.99 seems like a good deal. I know sex starved kids in other countries would love to have this!
Other countries? What about us?
Yeah! What about us? Why do we always have to go to Asia to find a foot goddess?
Well I for one will not take it anymore. We need to band together for global representation in the Asian Foot Goddess market.
*just looked up munting*
:sick:
you look up the craziest sh!t. hahahaaaa… that’s… sick.
Oh gawd! I hope you aren’t underage.
*shakes head*
Who makes this sh!t up?!? Honestly, I hope I never meet the person(s) responsible for coining that term.
What about those who commit the act!
I refuse to believe that anyone has actually ever done this.
*wishes there was mind bleach IRL*
I refused to accept what my client did. *plans to invent mind bleach*
Lucky I’m full grown, but still disgusted.
Not gonna look it up. Nuh uh. No way.
Methinks the Brewski doth protest too much.
wait for the “ewww”
*hands blackgarnets a female sheep*
Only on Wednesdays please.
I learned my lesson when somebody made a reference to “2girls1cup”, and I had no idea what it meant. So I googled it. Never again!
omg…I saw that somewhere…someone had it tattooed on them.
*racks brain…oh yes, I remember!! Go to rotten, clicky on boner; it’s in there somewhere…
One thing I’ve learned here: if someone tells you not to look something up or not to clickie, LISTEN!
I never listen. My friends also learned not to ask what when I burst out laughing for no reason…usually thought from the gutter.
ok going back to bed now, I can’t do this then go to class until 6. I’d explode.
*tucks a teddy bear under chez’s arm*
This is win
*check*
that list is getting long.
And Leon’s getting laaaaarger!
Anybody else think this is a fake?
Yes. It’s definitely Photoshopped.
They always are…
*examines pixels and shadows of magazines*
Hmmm… I’ll need to look at this very closely…
*hands Brewski magnifying glass*
Here, you might need this…
*hands Brewski a Shamwow*
…and this.
Or someone spent a couple of minutes getting a few adult mags, placing them on a different rack, then took a pic. Lame.
Yeah; but still funny
Livros de pesquisa de qualidade!
Why aren’t my comments working?
That’s more like it.
Are they on
strike?Mayhaps the blog is confused by all the name and avatar changes?
Who changed?
Do you think we didn’t notice?
*howdysqueeze*
*listens to the sound of Ninjas crushed hope*
I guess I tried to change my character but what I did about a year and a half ago back in high school will never be forgotten nor forgiven here.
I was lurking at the time, but I remember it very well. That kind of behaviour is inexcusable. Period. You have changed the character you post with, but it’s not an easy thing to forget how you behaved in the past.
I guess this is goodbye, then.
Stay or go, that’s your choice. If you stay, my advice to you is to stop hiding from your past behavio(u)r. Some people will reply to you and others won’t. Some people will forgive you and others won’t. It takes a long time to be convinced that someone has learned and grown. You’re ducking responsibility for your actions when you hide.
This is some what late, nearly ten hours, but let’s not start passing out A’s for perceived sinners to wear. If Blog Ninja wishes to be reborn into a new poster then let him. Let each new fail be a new chance. If perfection throughout our lives is a requirement then we are all screwed.
I hope that you also see this BN.
Thus endeth today’s sermon.
Sorry Coyote, but this is a late reply.
BN, you’re welcome to stay, as far as I’m concerned. I just wanted to let you know that I know, that your attempt to hide has failed. I liked your comments as Ninja and, if you remember, the Admiral even defended you against an attack from another regular. BUT what you did indeed was “ducking responsibility”. Maybe you really regret your trollish behavio(u)r in the past (good!), but your way to deal with that was pretty much the same thing that you did before – change your ID and behave accordingly. Your hint that you were Willtroll “back in High School” seems to imply that you’ve grown up since then. Well, no. You did it again, you just didn’t insult anyone as your new self.
I disagree with Coyote, IMO it wasn’t a “perceived” sin and I’m not asking for perfection. I’m willing to accept BN as someone who contributes. But I’m not willing to let him get away with yet another ID change without mentioning it.
BN, my advice is: Stay and continue to be a non-troll. But don’t change your ID another time. Trust is something you have to earn, and in your case, given your previous behaviour, it’ll take time.
I see.
Not me, not Brewski. Doesn’t leave too many options in this thread, eh?
*squeeze*
Yup!Thats most definetly “quality source material”,if ya catch my drift
I say it’s a sex ed WIN!
i Like this Class…
I wish my english teacher would create one such materials…
This should be a win!!!!!!!!
I got to agree with both Bill Gama and some dude. this should definetly be a WIN!!!!!!!!!!! and my english teacher is hot as hell.
Lol I wish they taught this in school. Absolute win.
That’s some awesome teaching material. My students would be a lot more perked up in class with those texts.
I suspect it’s the texts that would be “perked up.”
well phooey!
“I suspect it’s – NOT – the texts that would be “perked up.””
im applying for this school!!!!
WOO-HOO!!!
that chik is hawt and it does say “quality reading material”
WIN!
A B C D E F G H I J K L M *wanks* N O P Q R S E X *wanks again* Y Z
How’s that?
go ask your mother
There’s a teacher at a high school I went to that was in a magazine like those
Wow…Sammy Hagar’s lookin’ pretty good for 61 years old.
Thank a teacher
spank a teacher. she might enjoy that more.
omg…just reminded me of “Deeper” joke…lol
3 for 8.99? Im in XD
I think this is more win than fail
Nothing wrong with this….its for sex ed
i’m definently going back to school
staged fail for fail blog is fail….. 2 negatives DONT make a positive.
fail fail
I agree with Teh Kittyz … this is more win than fail ^_^
I hope Physical Education Teachers can get that stuff too.
Damn, im hot for the teacher!
Hustler – Makin’ learning fun since 1974.
Carnage!
Thoughs are some hot teachers
I actually work for this company! Those of us who work here find this absolutely hysterical!!
Thing is, the company split into two separate companies about 5 years ago. One side took the original name but had to relinquish the logo while the other got to keep the bear logo – that has since been revamped – but had to change their name. This rack is clearly one from before the split and I’m guessing someone decided to either sell them at a discounted rate or abandoned it completely and this place picked it up for free. Either way, the fact that it’s being used for this purpose now is damn funny! Sadly, none of the teachers and authors we work with who write our material look anything remotely like this.
i wanna make a research that
i wanna research that*
Pure WIN!
defenetly win!
I Want the Same Teacher please !
Perfect for Phys Ed class heheh >:0)
The tag says it’s a Joke Shop. Maybe this is kind of really intentional
Oh snap! I just fall into my biology classssss
Isn’t the blonde on hustler the girl who was murdered and stuffed in a suitcase by her ex… they guy was on some reality show that they now can’t air. Pretty sure that’s her.
wait, who banged Brooke Taylor? And will that be part of my exam-material?
Teaching materials win. A revolutionary technique. Caught my attention
Ok kids. Turn your textbooks to the center pages. Thats where babys come from. !!
this makes me sooo happy
i want to go to that school
*jaw drops* I want the one from hustler at my school
LOL! I’ve been to this store actually! It’s on the coast of the South-Eastern U.S. This rack was used ON PURPOSE for laughs. Looks like it worked!
so this is what teachers do after school
Hey honey, I gotta run down to get more teachers supplies.
I’m pretty sure this is an EPIC WIN!!!
for teachers teaching sex ed
where is this store already?
hah
DDDD
wowowowowowowlittlrdonkey likie that stufff
The fail fails… this isn’t teaching material fail, this isn’t teaching material at all… its material CREATED by teachers. It says clearly that its teacher created, not created for teaching.
So, the women on the cover are teachers.