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Cheezburger Network Blog
took a turn for the worse
Right, he should have left it well alone.
damned straight!
“Left! NO, your other left!!”
Kermit: Bear left!
Fozzie: Right, frog!
A bear in his natural environment, a Studebaker.
This should be a win!
Right, he should have left it _wall_ alone.
Haiku project day 3.
cop unable to
break Newton’s laws of motion;
career on the skids
*sigh*
Anyone know why occasionally when I write in the bottom box it shows up under my last post? It’s very annoying.
Did you try cross-circuiting to “B”?
I tried both “A” and “B”. I think I’d better check the alignment of the dilithium articulation frame.
You need to boost the power, Scottie!
I’m giv’n ‘er all she’s got! She won’t take much more of this!
I never ever got to press button “B”.
(does anyone know what I’m talking about? a prize awaits.)
The only thing I could think of was pressing the B button to stop a Pokemon from evolving…:(
*dons super-sexy, wet-looking, one-piece bathing suit with more skin showing than bathing suit*
*holds up ‘11′ card above head while prancing in a circle in very high heels*
If nothing else, I’m certainly enjoying your rating system for the Haikus LGB!
She has a rating scale?
Upon what does she base it?
And how does she rate this?
Well, it was a 10 yesterday. But I’m appreciating his efforts so much more today!
*gets calculator*
*divides by 15, carries the 2*
By my calculations, we should be up to elebenty by the end of the week.
This one goes to elebenty.
Thanks, DW – figgered nobody noticed.
*facepalm*
Elebentyhundred.
*joins WN on sofa*
*sips scotch and soda*
*feels small*
Glad you like it!
I love it when you do that!
*sips Scotch & Soda*
Glad YOU like it!
Refill?
Please.
*refills WN’s highball glass*
*adds fresh ice*
*adds a little umbrella*
*adds a cherry*
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww – you sweet!
*spits cherry out in shock*
Hay – no cherries inna Scotch & Soda, if you please!
*sits back down*
*smiles contentedly & twirls umbrella between teeth, doing strangely magical things with tongue that seem to make umbrella pass between dimensions*
*takes stem from cherry*
*flings cherry across the room*
How’d THAT get in there?!?
*smiles contentedly and twirls cherry stem with tongue*
YoU-turn out to be on to something. He didn’t signal at all either.
Quite discourteous, I’d say. You’d think he’d have all the time in the world. He couldn’t have been going THAT fast….
One thing we know for sure is that guy’s car is slammin’
LOL
Win.
That’s life in the fail lane, surely make you lose control.
Call the doctor. I think I’m gonna crash.
Faster, faster Fuzzy, the lights are flashing red!
The doctors says he’s coming, but you’ve gotta clear your cache.
They were rushing through the interwebz,
messed around and got lost.
They didn’t care, they were just dying to get off.
Give us dirty laundry money.
*digs in purse for tarnished quarters*
(These are the kind with the Eagles on the backs.)
*(Mc)Nab(b)s your quarters*
I think you have crashed, man.
♫ You say that this wasn’t in your plan
And don’t mess around with the demolition man ♫
♫There’s just one thing that you must understand.
You can fool with your brother,
but don’t mess with a missionary man♪
“life in the fail lane”
….loves it. That’s my new phrase to think when I see people I silently deride.
he was like “Ill catch up fellas, I gotta go pick up some stuff for the old lady!!!”
he just ran out of donuts
if only krispy kreme had stayed open later, he wouldn’t have had to do this!
that’s called understeer
Same problem the guy who lost his pants had.
“Hook ‘em, Danno!”
Missed it by that much
*Snickers*
That smarts.
Gas to the Max – well, that didn’t go so well…
It’s KAOS for that poor driver!
Would you believe, a drive thru pick-up?
There could be 99 reasons he didn’t make the turn…
And eighty-sixed the car.
He was stuck in the cone of silence.
Sorry about that, Chief.
Hmmmph… must have been Car 54 (Where are you?)
Khaaaaaaan!
*Shakes fist*
Serves me right for bottom dwelling.
He was taking a call from the Chief on his shoe.
And working his beat while hammered.
and that’s why you dont wear a seat belt
*walks into phone booth*
“ow!”
The cop must have yelled “DOT ORG!” as he went through the building – hence, no trailer to the video.
disORGanized crime fighter
The police are not here to create disorder, they’re here to preserve disorder.
~ Mayor Daley
Police do not belong in war zones.
~Daniel K. Moran
“You can’t fight in here! This is a war room!”
“We can not allow a mine shaft gap!”
Or “man im so fired”.
This is my third accident! They told me it would be my last. Sh!t.
Didn’t you see? It wasn’t a car at all! It was a bike!
DOT ORG!
And the wall was made of thunder!
Can’t you hear, can’t you hear the thunder?
You better run, you better take cover.
PRokkk
?!
That’s was the sound transmitted by the officer, just after the phrase “I’ll be in my bunk”.
“Maybe if I hadn’t spent that extra two hours in the Evidence Room over at VICE, I wouldn’t have mixed up a right turn from straight.”
“Oh, gosh, I…I-I knew she took female clients, I just…They look so glamourous together.”
Methinks the driver in that car has been playing Simpsons Road Rage for too long.
Actually, he was trying to finish his solitaire game and was distracted.
*snorkles*
I bet you he was playing with his shotgun and went off road.
He was sleep driving…and had a rude awakening…
So texting while driving really does interfere with reaction speed. Who’da thunk it?
Did you see that? That guy drove down the street and turned into a building! Is he a witch?
transmogriphying transportation
Exact Change Only.
Here, take my “L”, you’re looking a little peaked.
Thx! Two more to go.
Oh, and “peaked” is my natural color. When I wear white or light colors that wash me out, people ask me if I’m feeling well.
*donates an ‘l’ to the cause*
*donates one as well*
Thx! I found a “1″ lying around to use until I get a thrid. Kind of like the safety pin holding my bra togeth– *SPROING*
Oh, darn. Anyone got a safety pin? And a spare bra?
*hands LCB her ‘L’ and ‘D’*
Will these help?
*averts eyes*
*gives Lo1catburglar space”
Can you make it a double D?
♪ Brassiere, can you spare a D?
I, me. Que lástima
Oooh! I’m all set.
Still need the bra, though.
Just let the girls be free, lcb!
*gets out lighter fluid, gasoline and napalm*
D
*barrages bra with same*
Sorry, LCB. I CAN give you these, though:
*sneaks into last post*
*lights bra on fire*
KKKKKKAAAAAABBBBBOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!
There certainly have been a lot of asplosins today. Good thing we’re prepared.
*heads for ShamWows*
Aaaah. I love the smell of a bra-burning in the morning!
Does it smell of victory, DW?
That and…*sniff….sniiiiiiiiiiiffffffffffffff*…cotton-poly blend.
WOW, that’s impressive! Now close your eyes and tell me what this is.
*holds out mystery fabric*
Silk shantung with a pebble weave and variegated dyeing.
Well, no fooling you. You win the Sari that’s been made from it.
Just don’t drive it through a fabric wall.
Oh, no worries. I just had to, um, nip away for some *grumblegrumble* work stuff.
Pulls top down to show off convertible bra!
HEY! No honking.
Altered State Patrol.
Caught on Chimera
(… says the Protean ‘Burg’ar)
Let’s burn him at the stake!
*picks up pitchfork and flaming torch*
*leads angry mob*
*picks up hoe and rake*
*joins angry mob*
*is picked up*
Hey! Put me down!
But I already gave you $50!!
Was she trespassing?
Why? Do you want to ensure her libertine?
I’m no Lothario, I was just making sure she’s not prostituted without due cause.
*wheels out the scales*
*brings out the duck*
*puts down Hoe … erm Gracie*
Sorry about that!
JIMBO!!!!! I missed your bear hugs.
*squeeze*
*squeezes everybody*
*extra squeezes for Jimbo ’cause he was gone*
*bear hugs Gracie too*
*bear hugs Leila*
I had a day off, which never happens anymore, so I decided to put my two cents in.
*bear hugs Leila again*
*gives Jimbo .00003456 back in change*
*sets up a computer program to deposit .00003456 in change*
*screws up a decimal point*
*sets the building on fire*
*deletes all evidence of involvement from computer*
*sets above comments on fire*
*leaves*
*takes red stapler before it burns*
Um. Ex-excuse me? I, I believe you have my stapler.
*gives Dr. Marbles, et al., plenty of Office Space*
*demands corner office*
Don’t worry, Leila. It only takes a few minor adjustments to turn the cube into a cube with a view!
too bad there wasn’t a bridge, then he could have turned into a duck!
Viaduct?
Aquaduct?
*rolls tape*
Tear duct?
*wipes eyes*
Abduct?
*crunches abs of steal*
Subduct?
*Parks in basement*
Conduct?
*commits fowl swindle*
Induct?
*Starts Fuzz’s political career*
Product?
*fixes Fuzz’s…fuzz*
lol … I’ve got me a career and a new ‘do –
now I can meet a nice woman, settle down and reproduct.
Fuzz is now a coproduct.
*Files copyright*
Does that mean he swings both ways? That he’s a bi-product?
Let’s just say I have better halves that semi-conduct themselves respectfully in socially alternative currents.
*lowers resistance*
If you can conduct yourself semi-properly, we can find an alternative use for that duct tape. I don’t do anything in halves.
No into being just a half-conductor, huh?
In that case, put me down for some holy electric training.
Upbeat suggestion, Kapellmeister. You’re obviously wired for diminuendo…
*shows fuzz some legato*
And you clearly know how to create classic movement. Do allow me to provide a proper introduction of myself during the concerted intromission. And, here, to help keep your smooth legato’s bound for our beautiful music together:
*duct tapes, duct tapes, gooses*
Oh, you’re it.
You start half a reductio ad absurdum conversation, you can’t even finish it.
(Though I guess that duct tape over your mouth might have something to do with that ….)
*mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmmayyyyy*
Now you’re talkin!
Ce que j’ai fais, ce soir là
Ce qu’elle a dit, ce soir là
Realisant mon espoir!
Deduct?
*amends Ms B’s tax return accounting for side business expenses*
Circumduct?
*Finds loop holes to hide Ms B’s windfall*
Seduct?
*coils and curves*
Ductile?
*is tensile and drawn to you*
Quack?
How ’bout a lizard? You can take the one from yesterday’s fail. I’m sure the boxer won’t mind.
*hands Ms B lizard costume*
Here, lizard, lizard, lizard…
He turned down the street for a building?
That’s gonna leave a trade mark.
What’s black ‘n white on the outside, black ‘n blue on the inside and sped all over?
the special edition newspaper account of a bruiser cruiser
LOL!
*Tips hat to the hard driving Fuzz*
Mmm, if you only knew.
totally off topic but, mah bebe is on lolbabies! i just had to share. she’s on the vote page eating pizza
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!
*goes to check MM’s bebe*
Um.
Link?
Apparently I don’t know how to navigate the LOL website. I clicked on Vote and it keeps thanking me. I went to upcoming and I didn’t see a cat eating pizza.
I can’t find it either. I even did a Google search.
Over on the right – where it says other sites to visit – “my first fail – lolbabies” – go there and click on vote.
Yeah … found it after MRN pointed it out. I sent myself to the corner for a little while.
Such beautiful blue eyes!
*sniff*
Pssst Leila – reread the original post. Sometime a baby really means a baby. Then look down the list of “Even More Lulz” near the top, right side of this page.
Thanks, MRN!
*squeeze*
I always assume it’s LOL cats.
What a cutie!
Link included
Bad boy bad boy, what you going to do?
Oh you turned.
*Looks out front windshield*
Oh crap!
I guess I am going to visit the community members.
Dude just wanted to play some bingo at the VFW, what?
*Googles*
Who plays bingo on Videos for Windows?
Closing time isn’t universal it seems, eh, dilly?
It’s Vipers for Wombats, a very exclusive dating club.
Do they use Very Forward Words in this exclusive club?
Saucy to the extreme.
*crunch*
Where is the captain?
He’s busy crunch-a-tizing children. That sounded very wrong.
He is always playing some kind of Trix.
It’s just a matter of chex and balances, really.
That’s life.
You were exactly who Pop(’s)ped into my mind today.
Some days you just cant’ catch a brake.
(appears somebody has caught “L” from teh ‘burglar^)
It wasn’t me!
*looks up at the sky and whistles a tuneless tune*
Do we need to call the poice again???? And WHERE did you get the “D”???
Forget the poice. They never do anything. I think you should make a citizen’s arrest.
*sits and watches*
Maybe I’ll set a trap. Yeah that’s the ticket.
*Digs hole, puts blanket carefully over it, hides behind tree*
What a lovely day for a walk in the forest. I must do this more of-WHAAAAAAAA….
*waves smelling salts under BFF’s nose*
*gives him a cup of tea*
You looked like you needed those. I’ll be heading off nowwwwahhhhhhh….
Why looky here. I may hav been going for some little blue girl but instead I caught me a GEN-U-WINE bff.
*pokes to see if still alive*
*prepares to stuff and mount*
ahhh and the little blue girl was underneath him! MMMUUUWWWAHHHHHHH.
*now WHERE’s that L&D my pretty*
Was that said in a Wicked Witch of the East voice?
*shudders*
*bites nails*
And your little (wet) bathing suit toooo!!
Crackajacking?
Wall banging?
Harvey, is that you?
He was chasing a lead on the hole-in-the-wall gang.
Gave them the old “head ‘em off at the passssed it”.
He was determined to turn ‘em straight.
Forward, never straight.
brick building my ass
Braggin’ or complainin’?
I think it’s more of a request!
Sounds like a brick bat to me.
Do ya think he’s motar-fied?
There’s too much bric-a-brac to tell.
♪ She’s a brick
HOUSE ♪
Indeed you are dear.
♪ She’s mighty, mighty
Just lettin it all hang out ♪
That sounds like lcb up there ^ !
My thoughts exactly!
*snorktitty!*
Talk about a hard @ss. Glad he’s not my boss.
Hee!
srsly
Honey, I am home.
What’s for dinner?
*whispers*
*pssst — Leila*
*hands Troll Mallet, shellacked halibut, sack of poo*
For you-know-who.
*wink*
Thanks!
Bangers and mash.
Chicken under a brick.
The new drive-thru window at the local Winchell’s is not working out as planned.
THIS HAS BEEN POSTED BEFORE!
SHUT UP WE DON’T CARE AND IT HASN’T SO THERE!
*bakes fresh brownies*
Here BFF. This should make you happy.
Wait, are brownies an American food only?
Oooh, ta! *graciously accepts brownie* Have another mallet upgrade!
.
No, I don’t think so. the brownie is enjoyed in both the UK and Japan!
THERE WILL BE NO SHOUTING ON FAILBLOG!!!
I DON’T KNOW WHAT WE’RE YELLING ABOUT
WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?!?!?
LOUD NOISES
*ringing alarm clock*
*ringing alarm*
*ringing ringing*
so what? its still funny
*takesTroll Mallet and beats RU senseless*
*uses shellacked halibut to THWACK him further*
*takes sack of cow poo and swings at him a few more times*
*opens sack and empties contents on lifeless body*
Done!
Wait a moment!
*fires several artillery shells at RU*
*runs him over several times with tank*
*orders the flamethrowers to move in*
There.
serious overkill guys
You really think so?
I don’t.
*drops anvil on failinator*
*eyes discarded IgnoreButton™ on floor in corner*
There it is! I’ve been looking for it all day! Cheers, WN!
*picks up IgnoreButton™*
*pushes with joy*
I missed that IgnoreButton™. I could have used it earlier.
*clears throat*
Ice cream sundaes in the breakroom?
Ah, that would be delightful!
*heads for the breakroom*
And let’s have some daquiris and wear straw hats and sit under palm trees listening to calypso music with the sun shining brightly! Ahhhhh!
Don’t forget the cabana boys/girls!
I’ll bring a coconut bra for LCB…and anyone else who wants one!
Is she gonna have enough rum in that?
I’ll bring extras.
This will be sublime.
*sweeps pieces into a pile for ZA*
Wait. Does ZA eat troll parts?
*ponders*
just brain…and usually no troll brains..
Well, that kind of figures, since most trolls are brainless.
hee hee… so true *snicker*
Depends on how you want to define “brainless”. There is something in their skulls, but it’s just excrement.
*snacks on left over troll parts, just to be horrifying*
*GASP*
*faint*
*fans*
*catches LGB in one arm and McFail in the other*
*holds shot of Cabo under their noses alternately to revive them*
*sneaks in and drinks shot of Cabo when WN isn’t looking*
*pours another round*
*comes to*
*blinks repeatedly*
Where am I? Is that Cabo I smell?
But of course, my pretty…
Umm, I mean, shore, ma’am, that’s eggzackly what it is!
Cabo? Why no, that’s not Cabo. Why do you ask?
*hurriedly downs another shot*
*holds bottle behind back*
*facepalm*
Refresh fail.
*downs Cabo shot*
Ahhhh! The pause that refreshes. Thanks every so kindly, WN.
EVER. EVER. EVER.
*head in bukkit x3 today*
Not a problem – “every so kindly” has a good ring to it
*sips a shot o’ Cabo his own self*
hee hee *squeeze* oh, harumph, didn’t work being incorporeal and all
It’s the thought that counts. Thanks.
*swings arms through air and ends up squeezing self*
I figured I didn’t have to worry about getting you all messy, but that didn’t work out as planned.
is has to do with your name
get a shorter name
Don’t let yourself get to lonely waiting by the phone for anyone to call you anything.
ROFL!
*squeeeze for my fav undead*
Careful! If you squeeze him too much, you’ll get maggots all over the floor!
*sweeps maggots under rug*
Maggots? What maggots?
*orders new ShamWow’s for the clean up efforts*
*terrorizes salesman into quadrupling the order for free*
Flawless victory.
I was wondering what happened to that…do you need some more?
*offers second sack of cow poo*
*buys mask and puts it on*
Thank you SuzieQ. Can you just like, put it over…there?
No pooo-blem…
Put it over there? In loo of where?
MORE troll brains?
*sits down and munches on sack contents*
*snorkitty!*
*and rofflewiffle*
Not to mention *ska-weeze*
Indeed
Seriously!
*poke*
You poke you pay.
Fine.
*pays 1,000,000 internets*
*pokes Scott endlessly*
What? I paid for it!
:[
Looks like I’m the one paying for it now.
Seriously :[
*looks up from bag*
*wonders why everyone appears green*
Don’t :[
:]
*whistles*Don’t :[ , be :] *whistles*
aye, McFerrin — another great Scot.
Yeah, he kilt me with that earworm.
Sorry! Please don’t tartan feather me!
Nae, you’ll be sporr(t)an those feathers when I catch ya! *tars*
More like Female Anchor Fail – that’s so totally NOT a hairpin turn – stupid ditz….
more like Dea Fail. it was the female reporter who noted the accident, while one male was oblivious to it and the other one just grunted.
Famous last words: “Buckle up Carl, I know a shortcut.”
Im gonna make it gonna make it *crash*
walls, where we’re going, there are no walls……..um except that one!
wait is it real?
lets find out.
*crash*
Without walls and ceilings, who needs windows or gates? But if you have to, maybe over there near the corner …
Taking votes for the prompt removal of RU 18 YET. What say you FailPeeps?
YES.
Enough is enough.
Aye.
Aye.
Annoying, yes, but not overly offensive yet. Just head to the breakroom.
*mumble.mumble*
*holds off firing email to FB*
Fine, but I am eating everything that is chocolate in the breakroom.
*makes sure the breakroom is clean of decaying organic matter*
*puts broom away after helping clean breakroom*
ZA, I left you a few goodies in the locker on the far right. Couldn’t see ‘em go to waste.
*stuffs some chocolate cake in her mouth before Leila can eat it all*
Lurk = Gracie? When did this happen?
I posted a reply, Emp, but the Blogmonster ate it, so if this duplicates, I apologize.
*clears throat*
It was Brewski’s idea. He pointed out that Lurk isn’t a good name for me, since I don’t lurk. I took suggestions for a day or two, and chose Gracie (in honor of Gracie Allen). I changed my avatar for a while, but decided to go back to my balloon reflections.
*squeeze*
Glad to know if was still a familiar person and not an impersonator.
*squeeze*
There has>/b> been a pod person problem going on…ask her something nobody else would know!
lol, I’m special.
♪ Give yourself over to absolute pleasure
Swim the warm waters of sins of the flesh
Erotic nightmares beyond any measure
And sensual daydreams to treasure forever
Can’t you just see it?
Don’t dream it – >/b> it.
Rule one: give in to sins of the flesh.
Rule two: DO NOT TALK ABOUT FUZZY’S SINS OF MY FLESH
Concurs with Ms B… plus I think there’s daiquiris in there or something
OK, I take this back after seeing what’s going on below.
Aye.
Aye. Can we get both of them removed with one stone?
Infinitely annoying.
Tantamount to spamming.
Ewwwwww! SPAM!!!!!
*squints eyes, sticks out tongue*
*grew up eating fried spam*
:ick:
Doubly resplendent in their incandescent ickiness!!!
*pats Ms B on the shoulder*
There, there dear. It’s all over with now.
*pulls tray out of fridge*
Look! I made spam cookies!
WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
*pulls spam truffles outta oven*
*sings with chorus of vikings*
Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, lovely spam, wonderful spam!
AAAACCCCCKKKKK!!!!!!!
Seriously, what’s in spam?
Ingredients:
Chopped pork sho[u]lder meat with ham meat added
Salt (for binding, flavo[u]r, and firmness)
Water (to help in mixing)
Sugar (for flavo[u]r)
Sodium Nitrite (for colo[u]r and as a preservative)
Oh, I thought spam just contained Nigerian 419 scams.
*runsawaybeforeshepukes*
What? You have to keep ‘em cold! Oh, all right….
*puts spam cookies in microwave*
*watches sparks dancing in microwave*
Did you put aluminum foil shreds inna batter again?!?
Yes. And they’re batter off for it. Taste one!
mmmmmmmmmmm DOUGHY!!!
And I love what the alum shreds do for my teeth! No flossing needed!
*smiles*
*sparkle-sparkle*
I KNEW you’d appreciate them!
aye
Jesus mother f***ing, agrm agr, and arg some more…………WTF???? how do we get rid of them? have they not heard of AIM?? I am so ready to go mental and destroy things….
The living take things far to seriously. Don’t drive yourself mad trying to keep yourself from going mad. Life is a roller coaster, enjoy the ride.
They should add a “retarted police driver” element to the need for speed series too xD
you have taken down a retarded police driver -$1000
friend of mine who yust called me reply here
wait about a hour and a half
Texting, I bet…
who?
What?
???
Texting his girlfriend I guess …
“hey bb, in high speed chase now this so rox gotta turn …”
Nobody but bb’s bf puts bb’s bf through the wall in the corner.
*wants to dirty dance with fuzz*
*gets camera, lawnchair and popcorn*
*waits patiently*
*pulls lint off skirt*
*offers McFail handful of Pomeranian fuzz from GF’s puppage*
*pats and swayze’s memorably*
*moment of silence*
He was a terrible actor, but a great dancer.
*respects moment*
*pulls stereo from the grave*
*cranks up volume – plays The Time of my Life*
*10,000,000 zombies erupt from the ground*
*zombie hoard dances their asses off*
Pics or it didn’t happen!!
Hey everyone! I haven’t been on for MONTHS! How has everyone been?
Cannot handle open-ended questions like that. Give me multiple choice!
What has kept you away for so long?
Yes.
*snork-squeeze*
Hey Chaz. How are you? *squeeze*
To keep it all down to one comment…
RU 18 YET: Awesome, and glad to be back =)
MRN: a) I am doing fine
b) GREAT!!!!1111
c) meh
d) PUSH THE BUTTON
….and I’ve been away so long because towards the end of summer I was busy with college stuff and volunteering with kids with cancer.
Leila: *squeeze* I’m doing really well, thanks!
Last time we conversed on this site we were talking about Abe Vigoda stamps. It has been a while.
PS The volunteer work sounds wonderful. I’ll bet it can be incredibly heartbreaking and rewarding.
Oh yeah we WERE talking about Abe Vigoda stamps! Good memory! And you’re totally right about the volunteer work. It was always bittersweet, but definitely rewarding.
I confess, Google is my memory.
That there’s a mind-googling revelation.
*mind boogles*
Learning, how about you Chaz?. You still have that clicky to the troll cave.
no the wall died
The new meaning of drive-thru.
take a right thru the wall
Lol, GTA
WRONG in gta you cant drive thru walls
What really ticks me off in that game are the immovable street signs on the side of the road. I mean come on, you can knock down any light pole, but a simple metal street sign on a pair of 4X4 posts can’t be destroyed by any means?
ok if i can get past the street sign i will evade the cops
*crashes into street sign*
Wtf?
One time in GTA SA, In SF I was trying to evade the cops, I was on a motorbike, and I crashed into a lamp post, did a Barrel Roll and landed again on the ground .
friend from school who called me to find out how to spell failblog reply here
EYE.
validation question wich country do i live
South-Africa. Du
correct
first letters of first and surname
you have passed
frisbee golf!!!!!
Wh@t
you mean wh@ other wise its whatt
well i replied, didn’t i?
yes now anser question
SOUTH-AFRICA!!!!!!!!
hi about dang time ive been waiting 30 mins
I sent it 3 times moron
well im eating dinner so blame the fries
elo?
elo!!!!!!!!i am lindsey lohan!!!!
Ur Name starts with an F.
and your name starts with an Aldrit and ends with a Koltzow
i got the sms
*burnes comment*
dont worry no one probabley reads this
Man, this is a nail-biter! What’ll happen next??!!?
*snork*
he will kill me at school thank goodnes for vacation
^ is gonna get burned for not burne’ing an identity
He bourne’d it?
Dilly, do you think Qwaz is giving us an ultimatum?!”
Is that a question or a demand?!
What! happens next.
*bites dilly’s toenails*
Is this a threat?!
It’s a promissory note.
*crosses fingers and toes across the dotted line*
I’m guessing Du is wrong? Wow, glad it wasn’t so strict when I first started posting.
i have to make sure its him
Because you want to have a private conversation with him on Failblog. I understand…
Don’t make me bite u!
dont bite him hes a good guy
ur name starts with a F.
i know
Sorry u din’t reply
you must refreash erlieer i DID
I’ll be BACKIN A SEC.
to sms me
this is more than a sec
I’m buying a ticket to South Africa RIGHT NOW so I can set up tin cans with a string between your houses. And then administer backhand slaps.
that might work cuz we live very close to each other but i dont think hes there
I didn’t call you LOL hello anyways failinator! or you should be the crashanitor!
i wasnt talking about you cuz you arent in my school but hi anyways *squeeze*
Wait, which one is the brake again?
Yes. But u can still drive like a J@ck@ss
next on ztn a documantary about eolution
i dont know but more is coming
NO. NO, NO. Bad. *slap*
dammit mcclane!!!. you did it againd, didn’t you?
“Well Chad, it’s good going into the turn but then it gets really tight and pushes like a dump truck at the apex. We need to loosen it up in the middle of the turn.”
“No I can do it Billy trust me”
i trust ya
i posted it
is ok
epic fail
its new i dont know about it
I love how all the wrong people replied to my comment and not one of them understood what I was referencing (or appeared to at least). Who was it that recently went to Bristol? Why does the brain dead one have to drop hints like that?
Hey, gimme a break! Some of us have a life. Well, an alleged work life, but still…
I was the fber who went to Bristol. I understood, oh, undead one. If I wouldn’t have known better, I ‘d have sworn it was Kyle that put him in the wall.
Sorry, I forgot the living have this excuse for things called “life”.
He was trying to pull a Kansas Carl move.
Clickie!! Clickie!!
Clickeying is evil.
Would you have preferred I embedded it (I could have)? Today, after all we’ve been through??
Clickies lack the capacity of forethought, let alone malicious forethought. Therefore clickies can’t be evil. People are evil. The question you have to ask yourself is “how much do I feel like trusting an undead creature?”
I’ve never (to my knowledge) posted a clickie to anything that warranted the distrust I sometimes get, but that truth doesn’t mean I expect everyone to trust me implicitly. I will never post an obscured or shortened link because I want you to go where you want with your eyes open. One trick everyone should know is to hover your pointer over a link (like my clickie above) and read the link it’s pointing to (youtube). Some browsers pop up the link, others display it in a status bar (which might be hidden by default). Without being able to do that, you’re basically driving down the freeway blindfolded.
*doesn’t know any other undead creatures*
*decides clickeying on trusted FF’s clickies is okay*
*squezzes eyes shut and holds breath*
*clicks on ZA’s clickey*
*takes extra ‘Z’ and replaces it with ‘E’.
*sigh*
It’s been a looooong day….
*holds breath*
*hopes Youtube isn’t attacked at the right moment*
*keeps holding breath*
*can hold breath for a very long time*
now this is really old
Car 54, where are you?
Browsing the ladies lingeré section. How’s that chase going radio?
I was thinking, “Jake and Elwood ride again.”
Turn right to go left…no, no right to go left.
no your other right
Intercultural Question (I am German and we have no equivalent I guess): Why do they even try? The car chase that is, or better: the escape. Has anyone ever succeeded in escaping? Shouldn’t everyone be aware about now, that this is just another thing that goes on the judges list along with any traffic light and bumped car? Seriously: why do you have that in the US? Any hints will be welcome.
I think it has to do with a combination of stupidity and action films.
Might be a fight or flight response too. Some people are just so use to running away from things and not owning up to the consequences not matter how minor they might be.
Stupidity, which is universal. The only special form we have is filming these and putting them on TV.
We are the richest country in the planet and this is what we do for fun. We play cops and robbers IRL. You should try it in Germany Andre.
EPIC WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ht tp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=91oYiKas628&feature=related
try not to laugh or grin :p
me 30 millisecs till grin 1ec till laugh so you win
but i found it randomeley here comes another
ht tp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H7hU9oDV
oops
ht tp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H7hU9oDV_s0&feature=related
did you remove the space at http
lol that was awsome
only on an houer maby 13:00
You know what other site has places to comment about YouTube videos? Also, they don’t care if you can spell or make any sense! It’s a little slice of heaven, and, I know, it’s tough to find, but here it is:
YOUTUBE
*hands dilettante the IgnoreButton™*
Quick. Use this!!!!
*pushes*
Ignore what now?
“Tell me honestly, man. Have you ever flashy thingied me?”
“I ain’t playing with you, K!”
“I make this look gooooooooooooooood.”
“We’re not hosting an intergalactic kegger down here.”
SelfReply Fail.
*supports MADP*
Oh…my…
*phones The Powers That Be*
Yeah hello, Emily? It’s Little Girl Blue. Fine, thanks, and yourself? Good. Listen, I was wondering whether you might be able to rename the fail. Yes, we’d like it to read “Poice Chase Fail.” You say you can change it, but we’re going to have to what?!?
I think we’ve got more than a few who are willing.
Nominates Brewski
We’re nomming Brewski?!?!
Oh now we’re ready. Uh huh!
*pokes Ms B*
Hey everyone! I haven’t been on for MONTHS! How has everyone been?
you sound youst like that other guy lol
Zurack! How lovely to see you! There’s been lots of change here at FailBlog. Many, many people have joined our community, and a few trolls (an example is above my comment). How have you been?
Awh, I’ve missed the big red button
Me too!
Me three!
Oo!
*pushes button*
*drives in in clown car*
*does clown dance*
*boops Dragon’s nose*
*doesn’t know why*
*dances off*
^Dat made me laugh for reals.
*fails to restrain self*
*pushes big red button repeatedly*
NOOOO!!!
*universe implodes*
GFB I sense a disturbance in the force. Do you know what I mean???!!!
Welcome back Zurak.
I’ve seen this on TV more than three years ago.
wtf????
o jes………still dosnt make sense
you must refresh more often!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
わかりません。
Later…
*ninja squeeze*
Psychiatric Help 5¢
Well you see, doc, I just can’t seem to stop myself. I know she’s going to pull the ball away, but I can’t help but try to kick it anyway.
*walks into room*
*cloud of dust swirls around feet*
*pats Ms B on shoulder*
There, there. This will make you feel better –
*hands Ms B a peanut*
Ms B, the only reason the ball exists is to taunt you, if you ignore the ball it will go away.
That’ll be 5¢.
I think I’m beyond help.
Don’t be a block head, you’re better than that.
5¢ please.
*gives Marius a plug nickel*
*wanders away grumbling*
This doesn’t happen in America! Maybe in Ohio, but never America! Aaaahhhh :O
I’m getting pissed about the damn kids on here ruining my lawn today.
*kid peas on lawn of dilettante while conversation is going on*
Peas’ offspring are called kids?
You learn something new every day.
Looks like a knee jerk reaction.
Go fly a kite.
That’ll be 5¢.
I have headaches and I just went through a brick wall.
Ooh! Does that mean we can knee the jerks?? I’ll pay 5¢ for that!
No, that’s free.
500 yen please.
8.1358 Turkish lire.
*throws down nine one-lira coins*
Keep the change.
You now own a hotel on Boardwalk, do not pass Go.
I’ve thought about writing to Emily a few times already.
I’ll do it if you’d like me to. I don’t mind being part of the blog poice.
Know it sounds funny,
But I just cant stand the pain…
Cos it’s easily,
Easily like Sunday morning
Doitdoitdoitdoit
*chants doitdoitdoit*
Pretty please? With sugar and a (stemless) cherry on top?
Done!
*wiggledances*
Superstar!
Oh, lol. It’s funny ’cause it’s true.
I’ll do it.
AA? Can you also ask Emily whether she can change the title to “Poice Fail”? (jk … or not … take your pick)
Hee! I just did. But it wouldn’t hurt to have us both make the request.
*squeeze*
Need more numbers? I’m very, very happy to add my bulk to yours.
*Will join in if needed*
*gets down on knees*
*kisses DW’s talons and AA’s stars*
Thankyouthankyouthankyou!!!!!
*offers tray of spam cookies*
*squeezes Dragon and AA*
*avoids tray of SPAM cookies*
Thanks DW. I was ready to do it but I was vetoed earlier.
Hooray!
Please don’t hesitate anymore. The spam is everywhere.
Everywhere
*Runs out of the room a la BFF*
Blogmonster ate my other comment with the clickie, so I’ll try it this way:
Here’s something that will help.
ht tp://roflrazzi.com/upcoming/?pid=26559
*LMAO @ Gracie’s link*
Dontcha wish you could IRL?
Yes. Yes, I do.
But then you would be jailed. What would I do if you are no longer here? Oh wait, do they have the interwebs in jail?
*RIGL @ Gracie’s link*
Yes Leila, they do have the interwebz in jail, but only if you’re ripping off credit card numbers. No legitimate interwebz are allowed in jail – it’s supposed to be PUNISHMENT.
love it!!
*Kool-Aid Guy driving cop car and crashes through wall*
OOOHHHH-YEAH!
I was curious about the massive number of comments for today.
Then I saw who decided to pay a visit…
*covers Qwaz’s eyes*
It’s not pretty. Spam everywhere. So much so, I baked spam cookies.
*offers Qwaz tray*
Would you care for one?
*kicks Pigpen out of above comment*
Whaddafu…?
*Takes cookie*
*Squeezes*
Uhh… Spellcheck wasn’t one of the ingredients in your cookies, wait it?
You’ve waited long enough already.
*Morphs wait into “was”*
*morphs ‘was’ into ‘whaddafu’*
*stands back, admiring the affect*
“What’d you DO??”
“‘Tweren’t nothin, man. Just whaddafu’d the cookies is all.”
*swipes a cookie from Qwaz*
Hi! Sorry, I am just hungry.
*squeeze*
*Squeezes*
*puts “I take food from young’uns” sign Leila’s back while squeezing*
*removes sign from back*
At least it didn’t say kick me.
*sneaks up behind Leila and slaps sign on back saying ‘kick me’*
*runsfarfarawaywithaquickness*
Actually, no. I mixed some tinfoil into the batter, tho. Sparkly teeth AND no flossing necessary!
May I have a spam cookie please *puppy dog’s eyes*.
*shakes head slowly*
All right. Just one, though. I’m not sure I like your affiliation with a certain … ahem … entity….
*hands STS a spam cookie*
Thank you
*takes spam cookie*
*eats it and smiles*
*squeeze*
Wait. What the hell is a spam cookie?
*returns stolen cookie back to Qwaz*
Thank you kindly
.
*Shares with STS- who seems to enjoy these*
*tongue clicks on roof of mouth*
If you’re going to be gone awhile, you need to read the WHOLE blog. Jeesh!
*rolls eyes (cuz she doesn’t have any of those fancy-shmancy smiley doohickies)*
put the word —- roll —- between two colons.
This page was helpful for me.
ht tp://www.k-director.com/blog/text-codes-for-wordpress-smiley-faces-emoticons/
You’re both SO kind! I take back everything I said about you behind your backs.
It worked! Yay!
*claps hands with glee*
Now I can be just like all the other Sneeches!
*shows off star upon thar*
*really DOES have a star on her belly*
*Perks up*
Nice tidbit Avie
*Has no piercings or tats*
Yea I’m pretty plain… worse than white bread because I can’t become toast.
Goes to currency expert exchanges “e” for “s”.
Avis sounds much less Parisian.
THAT’S NOT RIGHT!
Poor building…
*weeps*
failinator C.C.C. and ??? need to get a room and get their horny chat in private.
Gee, if only there was some way to instantly message someone on the internet, or send them mail electronically. Maybe then they could have their private conversation in private.
Is that a private joke?
And they seem to know eachother personally. They’ll never find out personal data now.
long time no see, Halifax.
*welcome back squeeze*
Personal-ality.
Did you get my message Halifax? Failinator is pissed with me now and has dropped the C.C.C.. I thought StS invited him but It could of been me. My fault. I feel bad too for him.
You guys do need your own chatting tool eh?
Yeah, they should of looked into that.
Dragon just might faint when she reads that!
Arthur Eld will probably have a stroke and foam at the mouth!
Let’s get the camera ready!
*cries*
Awww, I didn’t expect that reaction!
*offers Dragon a cookie*
*sends DragonWriter bouquet of flowers*
I shoulda, in retterospec. I’m sorry, D-dubs.
*pat pat pat*
Now I feel bad too.
*offers cake*
:[
*offers spam cookie*
Don’t wince like that, DW! They’re good! Really. Ask anybody.
They’re… uummmm. Well, they’re definitely cookies.
We can send the result to America’s Funniest Home Videos! And get some cash!
How about Old Blighty’s Barmiest Manor PALs?
Should of, would of, could of!
*snork!*
*runsawayasfastaspossiblebeforeDragonshowsup*
*rubs hands together*
THIS is going to be g-o-o-d!
*readies camera and shamwow*
*preemptively digs another 18 feet down to stay away from possible flames*
*floats away in her balloons*
*”Entering zero gravity”*
I think it’s for the better of the group. Failnator 98% of the time is a very obnoxious troll whose actions were making everyone else think that CCC was the Taliban of Failblog.
There MUST be a way. *cue the sappy music*
Maybe far into the future there will be advanced technlogy that allows instant “chat” if you will, or perhaps messaging of some sort. Maybe even hand held devices where you can have a live conversation of some sort.
Ahh if only…if only….
*music fades out*
Wow! That would be so revolutionary!!! I hope someone gets to working on this already.
Maybe there will be portable music devices… That also make phone calls!
*GAAAASSSSP!!!!*
No way!!!! You are just blowing my mind here.
*faints*
They’ll also take pictures! Crappy pictures, but pictures nonetheless.
“Suppose the stock market crashes. Suppose Mary Pickford divorces Douglas Fairbanks. Suppose the Dodgers leave Brooklyn!”
*puts spam cookie underneath Leila’s nose to revive her*
That was no brick building. If it was made out of bricks, like real European houses, instead of cardboard and toothpicks, the car would have been crunched, with the wall standing… well… like a wall. ^^
You would also have a seriously injured police officer.
WHO DID THIS!?
You did, you forgot to put signs up to building codes!
OSHAt…
You can bet we won’t be seeing this on any of those “World’s Wildest Police Chase Videos” shows as hosted by former sheriff John Bunnell. On those shows the cops *always* win. This time? Not so much LOL.
Cop fought the wall and the wall won.
Oh … my … gosh. Fantabulous! Best comment of the fail! Take a bow, ZA!
SPEECH! SPEECH!
Aw shucks, tweren’t nutin.
*shuffles feet*
Yo, ZA, I’m really happy for you, and I’m gonna let you finish, but I had the best comment of all time.
*later on in FCA (Fail Comments Awards)*
I remember what it was like to make my first hit comment; and OH it was a magical occasion, but I’d like to give ZA his moment on the stage. ZA, where are you?
I am officially giving up on this fail’s comments section. Goodbye all.
There’s a solution being cooked up as we speak. Surely you can stick around a little longer?
*looks at watch*
Oh, alright. But you better make it snappy!
Wait, BFF! AA and DW told Emily. We might even see a name change on the fail. You CAN’T go now … history might be made in your absence!
*handcuffs hand to BFF’s ankle*
Oh. I see.
Care for a spam cookie?
*offers BFF tray*
*tries to act nonchalant about hand being handcuffed to his ankle*
Thank you.
.
Say, I don’t mean to be rude, but, ah, would you mind uncuffing yourself? I’m getting a cramp.
*looks around*
Handcuffs? What handcuffs? Oh THOSE
*pats down front of shirt*
Now where DID i put that key?
*feels in pockets*
*rummages through desk*
*suddenly remembers with a feeling of dread that the cookie had a sickening crunch to it*
Oh dear.
*finds key in freezer*
Ah! Here it is!
*unlocks handcuffs from around BFF’s ankle and attaches handcuffs to his wrist*
Hey, thanks, and-wait a second…you’ve handcuffed me! Get me out of this! Hey! HEY!
Took ya long enough!
*takes handcuffs off BFF*
Fly! Be free!
Thanks for staying, BFF — the fail just wouldn’t have been the same withoutcha, ya big galloot.
*glances knuckles off BFF’s chin*
I’ve agreed to stay, so no worries!
What happened?
Powers That Be? You. Are. Amazing!
No, really, what happened today?
Yes!
*makes sacrifice to PTB*
*sacrifices SPAM cookies to PTB*
I thought we were trying to thank them.
*the choir sings “HALLELUJAH*
*the heavens open*
*gets down on knees*
*kisses PTB’s feets*
You guys are the best!
Sorry, Avis. Annoying spammer.
A familiar one or a new one?
New. He was annoying right off the bat, but as time went on he got ridiculously annoying with the video posts and nonsense. Kind of like some of the posts still ^^ there from a familiar troll, but it really got out of hand.
Glad I missed it. Really glad!
*squeezes failfriends*
You should have seen what they did to my thread up there.
On second thought, maybe not.
I’m still pissed about half of the nonsense up there. rrrrrrr
HEY LOOK A DOUGHNUT SHOP! awww no drive through……time to make one
Looks like someone got a bit too excited… and is probably on paid leave
omfg thats not what u call a hairpin >.>
a hairpin is a 180 degree turn n00bs
friggen news reporters dnt know shit
*whispers to all regular Fail Peeps*
*pssst*
Does anyone know how old Leila is? She wouldn’t tell me in the last fail, and has conveniently forgotten to mention it in this one.
*whispers*
I know that she’s younger than me.
*nods*
21? I think.
Old enough to have a daughter getting married soon.
So 4 eagles/5finches/5spiders/1fox/6cats/high5/owl’s estimate is a tad off, I should think. About 30 or 40?
.
Please don’t kill me.
Nice GBF Bondfan. Take my name down with you. And no spam tookies to boot! Where you using me as a shield? LOL
*nods knowingly*
*whispers*
Thanks, Ms B. I’d offer you a spam cookie for your kindness, but I know how you feel about them….
*offers Ms B [insert dessert of choice here] instead*
Well, I guess this calls for a celebration. Cake, anyone?
Oh, you could talk me into it. And here’s some ice cream to go with the cake.
All the merrier!
*releases balloons*
*puts on dance music*
*10 million zombies erupt from the ground*
*zombie hoard starts dancing*
We’ve trained them well, haven’t we.
*dances with hoard*
*pops open champagne*
*cork flies across room and hits ZA*
*cork sinks into rotting flesh*
Ew. Just … ew. Sorry about that, ZA!
*noms cake & ice cream, enjoys floor show*
Thanks!
*keeps dancing*
*doesn’t notice cork*
Sorry about what?
opps…..
that police officer’s insurance just went up
oh…by the way
i am really sorry for my troll-like behavor on Playground Gallows Fail and if i start acting like a troll again you can shoot me in the head
Oh sure, that’s always the answer for the living. Have a problem, shoot it in the head. They never once think about what I’m supposed to be doing with their former problems, do they?
What makes you think I want to have to deal with you, especially when the living can’t?
well…..
where is the playground i have something to do…
so much hate on this website! newbies vs. regulars how stupid!
does any regulars remember themselves being called “trolls” and “noobs” the first time tthey posted a comment? most of you would probubly say no right? so newbies stop being disrespectful to regulars and regulars stop being disrespectful to newbies plain and simple. i bet you the only reason there are disrespectful people on this site is because they see other people do it.
Well Ghost of Levi come back with a new happy respectful attitude and new avatar and learn to listen then speak like me ok?.
*Puts hands in pockets*
*Rocks back and forth on heels of feet*
That’s ah… Good advice, 4 Eagles…
Bad enough the policeman that crashed wasn’t a great driver but even worse that no one stopped to help him…. I mean he just drove into a building!
Shink about it if you were a police officer and one of your best freinds crashed into a pick-up truck while you were chasing a dangerous seiral killer and rapist who what would you do? Save your friend or catch the criminal?
^i meant think^
Did she call that a hairpin turn? Really?
Are houses in the US made of paper? WTF?
Not paper, balsa wood. It keeps the weight down and increases their fuel mileage.
Waves Fist @ Wall :p
LMAO! Hair pin turn…you gotta love reporters.
Just goes to show you how bad FOX is.
What did the poor driving of the police officer have anything to do with the network the news aired on? You, sir, are desperate to insult FOX news.
it’s all part of the 2012 master plan, guys
btw I JUST LOST THE GAME
*bites tongue*
Erm…you have blood dribbling down your chin.
*hands dilly a shamwow*
Some cops going back to driving school haha. But the Crown Vic is fine, it’s a Ford.
Originality Fail. and this is not the first time:
http://failblog.org/tag/video/page/34/
gee i wonder why everyone hates the GAME
what is THE GAME?
if u think about the Game you lose and it restarts every 15 mins
oh..then i lost a long time ago
The suspect went from 3 stars to 6 with that maneuver.
Because I know someone will appreciate this:
Ninja Gaiden Sigma 2 at IGN.com
And I also would like to apologize for trolling more than normal. It’s just I’ve been super busy and I can’t do much else except post videos.
Thank you for apologizing. But gaming videos and spam have been a real problem today, maybe post thoughtfully if you have even a little time instead of perusing YouTube, please please?
Today? Don’t you mean always?
Well, I probably should save it until Qwaz and Alice come over, but sometimes you just want to share something. Plus, checking the FailBlog while also doing homework doesn’t ever get you in the right mindset for material. I’l stop posting videos with such frequency then.
*apologysqueezes Dilly*
And use proper grammar while I’m at it.
Proper grammar’s a good start, but I’m starting to feel–and I may be the only one–that gaming videos and rapid-fire talk about it are best put on gaming blogs…I like some of what I see of Alice and I adore Qwaz, but you all are not into slight references and nods when you post something, that’s what we’re about here, normally. I’m the last to sheriff FB, but I think you all should exchange emails and join a gaming forum, the videos and spam aren’t really meshing with the themes, here. *apologysqueezesbackforbeinglikethisbuttodaydrovemebonkers*
Not that you can’t stay! I didn’t mean to insinuate that. We just usually go with references only some people will get, and be subtle and sly about it…
*High-fives for opinion*
*Squeezes for honesty*
*IRARELYsqueezebutyou’vebecomeoneofmyfavoritesbtw*
*jots something down in “What Made My Day” Section of notebook*
I know it sounds like Dilly’s being harsh, but she’s right. I’ve occasionally looked at really early Fails in the series and thought to myself that I would never have started posting back then, based on the content I saw. There is no right or wrong about that, but a lot of people have gone through a lot of effort to maker this site what it is today.
I post differently now than I did 5 or 6 months ago, because I’ve adapted to the site’s ‘personality’. If I want to present a different side of my life, I post somewhere else, usually under a different name and avatar.
I thought I was trying really hard not to sound harsh, I’ve spoken before about how hard it was when I started posting. There were no welcomes, hugs, explaining of past fails, FAQs on a new, tied-in blog, no bukkits for spelling, nothing…and I loved it. But I love it now, too…sometimes more…and I won’t see this turned into a gaming forum, ONLY because there are tens of thousands of other places for that to go on. This place is something I worked on and love.
Third fail I ever posted on, someone (WhoaNellie) actually replied to MY post! What a thrill! Seriously! It makes it all the more special when it’s a little difficult to be accepted into the group. It’s worth it.
Hee! Most of us did the “trial by fire” thing.
Erm…not MY fire, mind you. Not *FOOOM!* fire. Just general, regular fire.
Believe me, it took me a while to get the hang of this place.
Oh, fire there certainly was.
I now wince whenever I hear “Brett Micheals”
I lurked for something like 4 months worried about posting, and still had my moments
You are both completely awesome.
*squeezies*
I don’t know about COMPLETELY awesome. There is that one toe…
*Is kidding of course*
Now you, amazing. Simply amazing.
*Squeezafying*
Wow dillettante we need to talk about the above.
That’s pretty much it up there…I know I can be rough on you, and trust me, I’m new to all of this confrontation, it’s seriously unlike me, but you have no idea how different this place is than it was about 14 months ago. I’ve been adjusting with all of the major changes, but it’s still new every week, as new people show up and lurkers unlurk and nonlurkers post and trolls emerge. Honestly, I have no actual idea what to do with you whatsoever, so I’m not sure what we need to talk about. Ask me anything, I’ll see what I can do.
I had a similar experience months back, Dilly. I just had to go with the flow and choose what battles to fight.
I’ve been trying to choose! I don’t know why I’m so bellicose lately, but I hate ignorance and carelessness here. I’m a lover, not a fighter, but this apathy towards anything meaningful or worthwhile in posting has to end.
You’re one of the best posters here. If you think this is a cause to stand up for, I’m right here with you. (It helps that I agree with you on this issue.) I don’t want this site to become a Twitter clone.
Well, MRN said it pretty well, so.. Yeah! What he said!
Do you know that’s the first time anyone’s ever told me that? And I don’t want to fight, but I think this cause is worthwhile.
Petition signed:
dilettante
Pffft. I told you that you were one of my favorites a long time ago.
*goes to pout in a corner*
Some of my favorites are not among the best posters here. So, technically that doesn’t prove she’s overlooked your past comment.
PS Dilly, you’re also one of my favorites.
*sign, sign, pass*
*sleeps*
Hm. Good point.
*signs petition*
I’m not sure what this petition is for. I’m all for adding content and discouraging mediocrity, but I’m not going back to the days of ridiculing people that aren’t “smart”. That said, I want to help raise the bar some…well, more than some, a lot.
That’s exactly what this petition is for.
*nods*
Well then, I pledge to add signal and reduce noise…
*sines*
*cosines*
I love you guys. Dubs, when??! I was included in a list of females once by Lunchbox, otherwise nobody’s said a damn thing, but I may have missed it…
AA: here’s the petition–
“this apathy towards anything meaningful or worthwhile in posting has to end.”
Hmmm…am I on a campaign for silly and smart? I need to think about this.
This may sound strange, but I always assume the really good posters know they’re really good posters. Glad I actually mentioned it for once.
Well, everyone enjoys a bit of recognition, Dilly. I’m sorry you feel you’ve been…under appreciated? I think you suffer from the same syndrome I do…only seven people on the blog understand you.
I can’t find the exact place, dilly…it was months and months ago. But I thought I often expressed my appreciation for you! I posted the Zorb vid for you–twice! I stamped “LIAF” on your forehead, ‘cuz I liaf you! I play with you all the time! You’re the only girl I ever *smooch* here!
And I’m rapidly using up my ration of exclamation points on you. :p
But I have obviously been remiss. I’m sowwy. Let me take this moment to say that you are brilliant and high-larious and truly one of the high points of this place.
Exactly! I don’t care if anyone else notices, so I post anyway, but when my people aren’t here, it’s not the same.
Awww…LIAF, I remember. (I’m terrifying like that!
)
Y’all keep me on my toes and heart <3
And I just LOVES you, Ms. Dilettante.
Half the time I don’t say it,
‘cuz I get all gobsmacked by something brilliant you say
(and/or want to leave the comment you’ve made as it is — I feel I can’t reply to it without diminution …)
Other better halftimes, I’m too
turned on byfond of your person to be coherent,so I justs fondlesmack you
(and/or can’t leave you alone and I reply that I feel you with
dimbright-inuendo’ing crescendo …)What’s html code for I f*cking love you people?
I don’t know if this means anything to you guys, but you all have definitely changed me for the better and you are all the best. I click pretty much every time I see your names in the recent poster’s list. Dragon, Dilly, AA, GS, MRN and Fuzz, just in case you don’t feel if you are being appreciated or positively affirmed. Well I think you are all great, the best even and (this be the part that might not mean anything to you) but you are all part of my favo(u)rites list.
This is why at least I love you, passion for what you do and what you are a part of. Yes it transmits that well.
*squeeze*
*squeeze*, kiddo. I’m partial to you, too. This means more than you know.
And you’d never believe this, but wayyyyyy back in the day, there was a time when comments were capped at, I think, 300? None allowed after that. AND CLICKING SOMEONE’S NAME TOOK YOU NOWHERE. You couldn’t look at someone’s new posts without scrolling down, remembering, and being careful not to spam up the 300 posts you were allowed. It was Lord of the Flies back then.
I was around for that. I am officially a year old on the blog now. My first fail that I posted on was belt-fail, the boat one.
Wasn’t there an extended view option though?
Without trying to incur any derogatory meanings, “You are one of my fave babes”
Here is the post.
Emperor says:
September 24, 2008 at 10:34 am
Jesus was bet that the boats were faster than him, he showed them the business end of a red shell, star combo.
http://failblog.org/2008/06/23/belt-fail/
*Sigh* I had to edit it…
I was around for that. I am officially a year old on the blog now. My first fail that I posted on was belt-fail, the boat one.
Wasn’t there an extended view option though?
Without trying to incur any derogatory meanings, “You are one of my fave babes”
Here is the post.
Emperor says:
September 24, 2008 at 10:34 am
Jesus was bet that the boats were faster than him, he showed them the business end of a red shell, star combo.
*Sigh* I had to edit it…
Moderated, sorry for the possible double post.
PS, who has the conch?
I do, and I’m not telling you what I did with it.
Do I want to know?
Is it kinkay?
Yes.
Instead of trying to decipher which question you answered, I must bid you goodnight. It is 3:22am and I have school tomorrow, at 9 am.
*Sends a little love Dilly’s way*
What, you’re in my time zone!? Off to bed with you, kid. *catches little love*
Since you’re so eager for a video, and we DO have some motion-spam here today, There’s a little somthin on last fail that’s not only a gaming video but will entertain ALL audiences.
You misspelled “sumpin”
Good for my business at least, i do car graphics and decals for some police stations.
OMG. Please spell every decal “POICE” from now on? And also write out “UNIT *heh, I said “unit”*
*Attempts to steer past comments section as per usual*
*Misses entirely and smashes through wall*
Um… Hey, guys! Long time, no see!
You! *Squeezasaur*
*Squeezasaurus REX!*
How’s it going?
Definately can’t complain.
However, I had no idea highschool would actually be comparable to a sitcom.
Super dramatic overtones in EVERYTHING: Do not want.
What’s life throwing at you?
You need to go back and watch some 90210. The ORIGINAL. It tells you how it is, man.
LOL @ American definition f hairpin turn
f’in Borgs.
Reminds me of blues brothers ^^
I’m gonna get those suckers. If it’s the last thing I ever do.
where and when was this?
2017, Sri Lanka. You’re welcome.
This why Asians don’t make good cops either.
Zoom…Zooommmmm…Zoooooooooommmmmmm
He wanted donuts
Here´s a weird thing for ya…
ROFL, LSD AND/OR WEED TRIP
Damn that Fail is old -.-
“I don’t care if a cop just died, there’s no way I’m gonna shut up about the murderer.”
they are there to protect, and serve ALL YOUR DEMOLITION NEEDS!
How do you know his steering wasn’t malfunctioning?
I feel like at the end of this there should have been the classic cartoon waaa waa waaaaaaaaa…
Probably was texting his GF damn kids.
Click my name for a funny Fail / Win stuffed bear pic.
That dam building jump in front of him
His sirens were going ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL
I LOoove how that one guy keeps talking about the chase like the copcar didn’t crash into the brick wall. FAIL.
This video is older than the internet. Again a FailBlog FAIL!
Well, what else do you expect from Fox News?
I’m OUTTA DONUTS! Hurry! Drive into the Bakery!
old video…
I say this live on TV, What a great laugh it was!