Click to see G-Rated Pics and Movies Only
« Previous Lazy Fail | Off Road Rig Fail Next »
» 574 Failures in Communication
-
Recent Comments
Redstar Chimera on Shop Fail or Hard Up Win? Raki on Shop Fail or Hard Up Win? grannycatflap on Shop Fail or Hard Up Win? gannetonastick on Shop Fail or Hard Up Win? grannycatflap on Shop Fail or Hard Up Win? Redspacecat on Shop Fail or Hard Up Win? Redspacecat on Shop Fail or Hard Up Win? McBee on Shop Fail or Hard Up Win? tim on Shop Fail or Hard Up Win? ShadowTheSniperZombi… on Shop Fail or Hard Up Win? 
Cheezburger Network Blog
poster child fail
I think he got the point.
He failed to stamp that post.
I think he’s got a post-partum depression in his back.
This is gonna be broadcast post to post.
That was a pretty dumb thing to do, on top of him damn near breaking either his back or his neck.
I hope this guy realises how close he was to death there – he’s one lucky dude, and a dumb f**k at that.
Mind you, the amount of things people survive through their lives…
My dad is a good example: when he was a child he narrowly escaped drowning, accidentily hanging himself, numerous fights with his high school teachers, and so on.
Oh, and he managed to fight off a small gang of chavs trying to steal his curry when he was walking home blind drunk one night, man that was epic…
bah, kids’ bones are made of rubber. When I was 15, while riding my bicycle, I hit a car head on- the car wasn’t going too fast, it had just turned, but combined speed of impact was possibly 30-35 mph considering that I didn’t get a chance to squeeze my brakes. I hit the ground on my back, did a combat roll to my feet, grabbed the wreckage of my bike and cleared the intersection before I even realized what had happened… then some guy handed me my wallet. If only a camera had been rolling, that would have been some good comedy.
Kid’s lucky that pole didn’t find it’s way to his personal pole.
He’d be rubbing the other head if it did.
What an imposter!
impostibble! he is not an imposter.
My sister hit a car aswell once. The car was parked on the side of the road. You could see it from 50 meters (very far) away. She hit it headfirst on a bike. I’d say she was going 10 km/h (very slow).
How she hit it? She was busy telling me to watch where I was biking, and not be so reckless.
Ironic fail, no?
That “guy” was me… Your welcome.
cool story bro!
Your father survived fights with his high school teachers? Did they use to fistfight back then?
I believe it was called fisticups, but you are correct.
One of his mates locked a teacher in the classrooms supply closet, who cried when they wouldnt let him out xD
Worst thing is, i’m in the same school he went to now, and some of the teachers that taught him are still there O_O
No revenge pl0x Mr. James!
Care Troll alert!!
We get them from time to time, but nothing like ICHC gets them!
Just tring to alert BondFan so he can live up to his new name claim of countering Trolls with witty comments — please note that I am not suppying the witty comment (but of course you alreasy knew THAT!!)
*hands Elsa_Mama a witty comment to give to BondFan*
Ooh! What’s the comment? Is it cynical, a riposte, or simply intelligent?
Dunno – it’s outta my hands now…
Yes.
*looks at comment from WhoaNellie* *turns it over, checks out the back* *scratches head* *tries upsidedown* Hmmm — OK, here it is:
“Don’t worry … Be Happy”
WAIT! – WAIT! – I gave you the wrong comment!!!
Oh fine — trying to make me look even less witty than usual? That’s not very nice!! *pouts*
Hmmm, I like it! Simple, yet thought-provoking. The Perfect thing to keep away the little buggers!
Well, that was really my comment — WN handed me a blank piece of paper — yep she did!
Whatsis “she”???
Is there some news you’d like to tell us, WN?
Hmm?
Here take my card, I always carry a few of these.
*Offers card that says the same thing on both sides. “To amuse a troll for hours turn this card over”*
Dangit! It’s just too dang hard to tell people’s dang gender on teh dang interwebz!
Sometimes the comments (or name) clearly indicate gender — but not always.
Exhibit A?
Nope — I know you are a boy Quaz … (or were you referring to me)
I’ve only heard “Mama” used to refer to a woman. So I just assumed you were, well, a woman.
So true.
Oh dear! I’m late for my manicure, pedicure, and facial!
And you are correct!! I do not know what I have heard Quaz refer to, but i still knew you were male (do not want to offend you with the “boy” comment twice) …
Sorry Brewski, but you’ve lost your pants too many times to leave any question about gender. The scary thing is when you can’t tell what someone is in real life.
Don’t forget your bikini wax, Brewski dahling.
Ahhh Brewski — the metrosexual …. do you get a buff or the clear polish?
I think you still qualify as male …
a post-operative male man … hee
A hot, sexy female man?
The female-est.
Who, me? I’m too girly?
Hey, can I have some Gatorade? BECAUSE I LEFT ALL MY ELECTROLYTES IN YOUR DAUGHTER!
Sorry, babe, but you will always be the naughty nurse to us.
…ready for some nunsense.
nonesuch operator too good to be true
lytes up her affairs au courant
He didn’t address it very well either.
Went postal.
The post was on strike so he went ground.
The post… partum??
Post Traumatic Syndrome…
You post, you pay!
(Extra for defirmed conlivery)
seriously infirm confirmed
(too much infirmation)
I’ll steal your livery.
Aow, wouldn’t it be loverly?
“It’s delightful, it’s delicious, it’s delectable, it’s delirious,
It’s dilemma, it’s de limit, it’s deluxe, it’s de-lovely”
Sean Connery, Thunderball
Child molester fail?
I know, I know, but it’s killing me – I have to ask!
JasonK – how is this a child molester fail?
I’m pretty sure it has something to do with a child getting a pole shoved up his *ss, but what do I know? It’s not my chosen proffession, but J.K. might know a bit about that subject.
No need to bring Harry Potter into this.
I knew there must have been a good reason for me skip that fad…
I read the first two books then gave up while reading the third.
Wands at the ready…
Oh, Ron, not again.
Watch out Quaz, Herminey likes to show people her “Chamber of Secrets”.
Eh, it’s not.
The name just reminded me of a previous fail named Child Molester Fail.
This can hurt very bad if you are gawky like the guy in the vid.
But would feel just lovely if you are a non-gawky guy ….
Medic!
Don’t worry kids just bounce back.
Yeah, but this kid will probably try to do it again!
He’ll likely suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.
+1
Later it might turn into Post Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.
Did a comrade help him…no palisade?
(fluffy’s comment double-posted)
One fish, two fish…
row your boat row your boat 2 fish
We’re gonna need a bigger*FLOUNDERS*
Don't you worry, I'll catch ya.One way or another?
I'm gonna et ya', et ya', et ya', et ya'Someone please think of the post!
*cries* I didn’t ask for an afternoon teabagging! Why??
…Because you didn’t think of it??
STOP READING MY MIND
*runs*
I see what you were thinking there.
*makes tinfoil hat*
ARF!
Or, as Michelangelo said after he fell off the scaffolding in the Sistine Chapel:
(wait for it)
“Medici!”
*snorkroffle!*
“The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and smashing delicate parts of ourselves on a post.”
Leonardo on me, if you’re not strong.
Shredding the Splinter group, are we?
What happened to your avatar, LCB? Are you a Cheshire Lolcatburglar?
Doctors; have you thanked your local dumbass for all that extra cash?
Lord, we thank you for the extra semicolons that enrich our lives.
(must be talkin’ bout them semi-proctologists)
I liked the part where he with the whole pole. like he even looked both ways before he. wow.
I saw your grafitti in a bathroom.
You accidenty your action verb.
He’s accidenty several things.
Oooo, it’s Mad Libs again! It’s been a while…
Hee hee! Great minds, you and Arthur!
*squeeze*
*return squeezies*
congratulations on at least managing “poodleslayer” in one!
Oh Yeah, click my name. you know, you want to do it!
No.
Not even a wee whisper of desire to do so.
NO CLICKIE!
STRANGER DANGER! BAD CLICKIE, BAD CLICKIE!
Eeep!
*runs away screaming, while making sure to leave behind appropriate internets for BondFan*
Thaaaaank you.
*collects internets and places in briefcase*
So, how many internets do you have? And, what pray tell, do you do with them?????
A quarter of these internets go to charity, while the rest are put into the “GBF replacement body double, army jeeps and troll bashing mallet” fund.
Did you ever implement tatooing bar codes and expiration dates on your body doubles?
I did indeed. Now I know where all my body doubles are and – oh god, one’s about to drive off a cliff! To the tank!
No! To the BondMobile!! Must stop that body double or they will all follow lemming like after – and then where would you be???!!!
Seems like i need to think about a new strategie.
Ha! I’m just gonna use tinyurl. Oh yeah, in the next fail there’ll be new idiots, that’ll click on my name!
The next fail is in 14-1/2 hours. Don’t hold your breath.
14.5!? Is it really that long?
……………………That’s what she said.
(sorry I had to do it. Seriously though, is it really that long of a wait?)
Check the time stamps of all the fails. Occasionally we get a bonus fail, but failing a bonus the next fail is due in the wee early hours tomorrow.
I don’t know how I missed the time stamp. Thanks Avis.
On the other hand, maybe you should hold your breath. Yeah, I think you should.
whaddaa think – for, say, an hour?
I was thinking he should hold it until the next fail, but I’m mean that way.
I trust tinyurl links less than youtube links – even good ol’ Rick Astley cant get you a virus on youtube
Somebody’s asking to be banned…
This is old and I memorize the URL.
Clicky on my name is much, much worse.
Uhm, i’m more the Super Mario Type.
That’s because anyone that likes Superman 64 has mental problems.
When you say it.. i trust you.
This is actually a pre-walk-fail. Since Youtube we all know what happens when you try stuff like that, so think before you do that.
Bad things can happen to those who post without thinking.
Or if you try something posthaste without considering the consequences.
He ended up on his posterior.
He managed to stop ostentatiously.
Perhaps he just happened to miss the last post?
*ahem*
Apologies to LCB for cribbing and changing her meme, but…
Is he posthumous??
*giggles*
We need a postdoc, STAT!
Better bring an apostle too for inspiration.
*tries to think of a witty riposte but fails*
*hands jam an apostrophe*
No, no…you weren’t missing one. I just thought it might inspire you.
(Comments will not nest below this post.)
Preposterous!
You can expostulate all you like, but that doesn’t change the truth!
*waits for Avis to nest below these posts…*
*gesticulates wildly*
Maybe she’s due for an apostate exam?
Turn your head and post?!?
*has been working on a Failblog regulars avatar related poster*
*snork*
“gesticulates wildly”
*snork*
*raises right eyebrow in Avis’s general direction*
Heaven forbid you raise the wrong eyebrow…
*shudders*
It’s just an idea I’ve been toying with.
Ya know, I always thought I’d go back and change my avatar. I just picked it on spur of the moment, no great thought went into it.
Now I’m kinda committed. In more ways than one.
Not everybody would be literally depicted as their avatar. Admiral Apparent for example, would be a knight in shining armor, wielding a spatula. One of these days I’ll figure out how it will all work.
Oh. No.
I can already see how I’ll be depicted!
You could make it as a patchwork quilt to make it more meta.
I was thinking a guy drinking from a frosty mug of beer with a censor-bar across his lower half!!
And Aja, I thought about using the geometric quilty things that are automatically generated, but I thought it might be fun to try it the other way too.
*snorkity*
This should be interesting!
Try to work a flattened hat with the spatula.
…And make sure he’s wearing white satin!
That’s good!
I’ll steal from my own post below and add:
Did he Daedalus?
Right on his posterior!
(Oh! Sorry Brewski! Just noticed you used that one at 10:11. Whatever can I do to make it up to you????)
I think a squeeze and a smooch should do very nicely!
One squeezie-smooch, as requested!
**squeeze****smooch**
And it’s on video to be seen by all posterity.
Are you speaking posthumourously?
♪And I sing you to sleep,
after the laughing,
with song I just wrote
yesterday. ♫
Wow – no replies. At first I thought it was because no one recognized the original reply. Then I heard a faint chanting, getting nearer and nearer, louder and louder…”Shun! Shun the pun-run breaker!!!
I thought it said *squeeze* the pun-run breaker!
*squeeze*
*squeeze* Hi, Lur….Gracie!
I think therefore I …..wait, what?
Exactly…
That attempt was bound to fail
That was no attempt – it was practical suicide!
I suspect his IQ just dropped about 30 points. Probably wasn’t very high to start with if that seemed like a good idea.
If thats true, his IQ is -31 now. Poor guy…
ooohhhh, the pain!! that hurts just to watch!!
Yeah, I’m going to be trollish and say I don’t like fails like this. That looks like it really hurt, and I don’t consider injury funny. OK, now that I’m done being a party pooper,
*squeeze!*
*drops banana peel behind Brewski*
What did the nice judge tell you about plantain evidence?
It opens the door for appeal to a higher court.
She said I was fostering a talent for trouble, and that I’ll get my just ice desserts.
But when you took it to the Supreme Court it was a split decision.
You guys are just fostersing his fear, now!
That’ll happen when you try to daiquiri favor with the wrong element.
When I think of the possible sentence, I scream.
That’s a sure bet.
Poor Admiral.
♫ Wishes it was Sundae, because that’s his fun day. ♪
Dammit. I just realized I repeated a pun.
*bukkits par (mal)fait-seance*
It’s okay…it was my pun. No flambé coming your way from me.
*wonders if she can use the excuse that her pop is sick(le) and so she’s distracted*
Naaaah. I cannot tell a lie!
A deep dish like yourself rarely suffers such a brain freeze.
This is the punniest Fail I have seen in a very long while!!! The plethora of puns has put the freeze on the usual roleplay horny chat!
(orange you glad they didn’t say banana again?)
(Artie Chokes when he eats too fast!!)
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Post.
Post who?
Ok.
who?
(Wait!! Slow down while I Ketchup to you)
A supposedly true story about Charlie Chaplin:
.
The playwright Charles MacArthur had been brought to Hollywood to do a screenplay, but was finding it difficult to write visual jokes.
“What’s the problem?” asked Chaplin.
“How, for example, could I make a fat lady, walking down Fifth Avenue, slip on a banana peel and still get a laugh? It’s been done a million times,” said MacArthur. “What’s the best way to GET the laugh? Do I show first the banana peel, then the fat lady approaching, then she slips? Or do I show the fat lady first, then the banana peel, and THEN she slips?”
“Neither,” said Chaplin without a moment’s hesitation. “You show the fat lady approaching; then you show the banana peel; then you show the fat lady and the banana peel together; then she steps OVER the banana peel and disappears down a manhole.”
Gotta love Chaplin. Apparently he came in second at a Charles Chaplin lookalike contest!
Third, not second.
Ah, ok, I don’t remember that very well, I heard it in a movie but don’t remember which either.
I think that’s a fail in itself, on the judges part.
We only had one entry in the Madame Curie Look-Alike Contest, and he had to be disqualified later!
Careful Brewski! Postassium behind you!
Oh, K!
~~
(from Latin: kalium, from Arabic: القَلْيَه al-qalyah “plant ashes”, cf. Alkali from the same root)
doo dee doo dee doo *walks by with sweeper pail and broom. wisks up banana peel* come on now, safety is third… doo dee doo dee doo
*SQUEEZE*
She swept up the banana peel, butt left behind huge piles of doo dee. Methinks I would prefer the peels!
Arghh — placement fail — this belongs after Abstract’s Doo Dee post!!!
Sometimes, doo-dee calls!
Nope! Never!
Ms. B … ? Does your doo-dee sing?
*snork*
This bit ‘o conversation is reminding me of my trip to the zoo yesterday!
I’d like to know what kind of zoo you went to, Ms B.
My guess is it wasn’t so much the zoo, as it was the age of the persons she went to the zoo with!
The kind that has monkeys and apes, methinks!
“Mommy, what are those two animals doing?”
Monkey see, monkey doo…that’s a gibbon.
Saw a gorilla relieve himself, and put it back for round two! We then left and went to lunch…
Ack.
I don’t know what else to say.
It calls!???
It… it can talk!??? What the hell have you been eating????!
Well, as they say, money walks, and bullshit talks.
*snork*
That’s what you’ve been eating???
Ewwwwwwww!
Does he still have his pants on today?
No one knows for sure.
*squeeze*
*checks to make sure MY pants are on*
*SQUEEEEEEZE!!!*
(Psst! “Who” is the question, Avis!)
*giggles*
*squeeze to Avis* – 3 days till I’m in the Land of Lincoln!
*squeeze*
Just in time for the rain! Up here anyway. I hope it’ll be drier where you’ll be.
Oh, and you’ll never guess where my mother was this weekend!!
.
.
.
At a Nascar race!!!
Oh, how cool! She was in Atlanta? How’d she like it?
(I hope it’s drier in the south, too!)
Nope, she was in Sacramento. Maybe she had the name of the race wrong. She’s not really a race car kind of person. I didn’t bother to look it up to see if that’s what it really was (at the time) because I’m not really a race car kind of person either. They just aren’t my thing.
Instead I went to a friends house and…. watched movies…
In any event, I hope she had fun!
(BTW – is “watched movies” a metaphor for something…?)
Sorta. We did watch movies… earlier. It’s kind of a complicated story and I don’t really know what is going on now, so, when I figure it out, I’ll give an update.
Well, don’t complicate matters more by trying to define things. Let whatever is meant to be, be. The future’s not ours to see.
That is one lesson I know all too well. I intend to let this play out however it’s meant to. The temptation is strong though.
hee hee!! doo dee
Abstract’s doo dee laughs!!
*snork*
First penis jokes and now this? Are you a fail-snob?
*squeeze*
I can never figure out where these poor lost replies are suppose to relate back to …. *shakes head, walks away in confusion*
*elsa-squeeze*
I say, Ms B, these juvenile fails are not worthy of my superior sense of humo(u)r and intellect! How crude! Now, if you want a truly inspiring fail, my dear, look no further than the Boston Symphony Orchestra. At the beginning of last month’s performance, the conductor accidentally picked up the incorrect baton! It was a 12″ baton, instead of the usual 16″ baton he uses!
HA HA HA HA!!!
One can always look no farther than the various branches of our feral government if one is in search of truly stupendous fails…
Oh, the typo that isn’t! *snork*
*dons monocle, suit, and fancy British accent*
I say, my good man, that did elicit a chuckle or two from me, indeed.
*sips tea*
But were you not listening to the third violinist from the right? He intentionally played the B♭ an octave lower than he was supposed to!
*ımagines audience member shouting ‘EPIC FAIL LULZ’*
Ah, those blasted trolls, always coming to ruin our jolly old time.
Mr. Peanut?!
Monopoly Man!?
Ya gotta hold your fingernail directly on the line of the thread, then scroll way, way, way, way, oops, finger slipped. Let’s go back down and try this again. Okay, scroll, scroll, damn, phone’s ringing.
Or you could just blame in on Arthur and continue on. That’s what I do.
Mazda WIN!
Oh wait, is this the right thread?
*snork* — Ok – so I have been doing it right!!
I hope he didn’t go postal after that.
Get this kid a brain-transplant, post-haste!
postal air head male
You there, fill it up with petroleum distillate, and re-vulcanize my tires, post-haste!
Sounds logical.
Failed attempt at shish kabob too.
♪ I believe I can fly… ♪
*thud!*
Eventhough i cant laugh about the video, i now laugh about the comment .D
Evidently you impaled one of your eyes with that post. I’m so sorry.
Oooh. Just wait til he goes home and has to face his daedalus.
*!magines what will be left after that encounter*
…
:ick-arus:
Great scylla is required.
It’s all I can do not to Charybdis puns from others.
I’m naut gonna Argo with you.
What did Ariadne say to Theseus just before he went into the labyrinth?
“Oh, you are SO clewless!*
He never could have slain the Minotaur on his Ionian.
(Ah, and my socks unraveled as they flew…)
*fleece the thread*
I Kno(ssos) this is difficult, but you can do it, Aja!
That’s one for the Aegeus.
Declivity is the sole of twit.
Look before you leap.
The last step is always the hardest.
One small step for a man…
Hey!
*snork!*
Great minds think alike?
It was one (too) small step for him.
Boys will be boys.
girls exfoliate, boys expostulate
A gurney and a thousand stitches begins with a single misstep.
Extreme step-aerobics.
He’s fallen off the 12-step program.
Now he’s drunken abandoned his post.
OT quote:
Do not judge a man before you’ve walked a mile in his shoes, because then you will be a mile away, AND you will have his shoes.
What if they’re Stuart Weitzmans? It’s the perfect crime. There’s no way he can run a mile with no shoes to get them back from you.
A post to the head is worth two in the tush.
The end justifies the means.
All’s well that ex post facto’s well.
And, the last cut is the deepest!
*sigh* I hate when I do this — so many replies in between and here my post sits making even less sense than it ever had any hope of making even if it nested right next to the post I was repling to … poor lost senseless post
Fear not, we still follow and laugh at comments that fall way below their target post.
*squeeze*
What you need is a hearty breakfast.
*serves E_M a bowl of Post Toasties and a steaming mug of Postum*
Yum — Those Posts really hit the spot!
But these fail posties toasted that dude.
*pouts about the loss of Postum*
*hands Ms B a shot o’ Cabo Wabo*
There. That should help.
Hmmm… Postum vs. Cabo Wabo — an interesting battle to be sure!!
Oh, Ms. B, if the Cabo Wabo does not cut it –//www.organichealthforlife.com/Dandy-Blend-p/b-db0000.htm?gclid=CNjHqMLl4pwCFdZM5QodLTRAKg
(add the http)
Dandy-Blens a Postum substitute although I am not sure about a substitute for a substitute …
I’m just impressed he didn’t manage to impale his nuts on one of those posts.
If only…
“If only, if only,”
the idiot sighs,
“I had thought this through,
If I’d stopped to revise
My idea of walking
on pathway posts only,
My balls might be whole again.
If only, if only.”
*applauds*
ENCORE! ENCORE!
*applauds as well*
Do another, do another.
*snork!*
Genital mutilation is never funny
Buddy, you’ve stumbled across the wrong website, then.
Saying “Genital Mutilation” is!
Now you’ve made me
thinking about the kind forced on women, as opposed to some stupid kid asking for it.
♫ Wait a minute Mr. Postman! ♫
♫ Wouldn’t you stop to make me feel better
By leaving me a card or a get well letter?? ♫
♫I’m falling for you…♫
♫Jump up, Jump up and get down♫
He’s in training for a Darwin Award.
I can already hear the words:
“Hey watch this!”
I’m hearing the FB slo-mo™ replay in my head now.
“Huuuuoy woooooaaytch thuuuuuuuuss”
You forgot the “hold my beer…hic”
Ouch! When I see that I’m feeling the pain…but well, it’s his own fault! Haha
Yeah – thats gotta hurt! He almost broke his neck and/or spine when he landed. I feel evil laughing, but what the heck MWAHAHAHAHAHA!
Yep — At the end my comment was
“Owchie Wow Waa!!”
haha what a dumb twat
Nothing gets past you, I see.
His detailed observations astound me.
As well they should. Here at FailBlog one of the greatest literary minds of the 21st century walks unnoticed.
Ya gotta give him credit for surviving the first 2 posts though.
Gee Bert, that was kinda crude.
Well Ernie maybe Bert would be in a better mood if you would stop leaving COOKIES in the d*mn bed!!!
Bert… you’re yelling again…
*produces a rubber ducky from purse*
Here this will calm Bert down.
Hmm. Maybe, but I think alcohol will work better.
CLICKIE!!
He might’ev tryed to impale himself… kids this days are wierd…we all know that
Well, he tryed. That should count for something.
I might’ev not responded to that post but it was just too wierd.
Kids this days.
And here I saw the comment as a little wired.
Weird.
Missed it by THAT much.
Agent Smart! Get back to your post!
Boring ouch-movie.
Nicht ganz!
Jeez this is so American, sorry about the capital ‘A’ as in Anal.
What it is it with your kids and the need to be cool-thru-being-an-arsehole?
FFS… cant they be aborted at birth?
I don’t think he had that accident on purpose, he justed wanted to do a stunt like most kids at his age, I guess.
What you fail to realize, having been spoon-fed facts and trusting your judgement to stereotypes your whole life, is that many[1] Americans are productive, intelligent people. The stupid ones, unfortunately, have a greater tendency to wind up on the
idiot-netinternet and thus get subject to the gaze of your incredibly close-minded, judgemental eye.As well, should somebody who decides to go by the pseudonym “Slackness” (which I can tell is an obvious sign of great intellect), really have the right to show scorn for others’ lack of intelligence?
This concludes Shadow’s rant of the day, brought to you by the letters ‘W’, ‘T’, ‘F’. Funding for this program was provided by The Who-The-Hell-Knows-Foundation, FailBlog, and viewers like you. Thank you.
_________________
[1]: I wish I could say “all”, or even “most”, but unfortunately it is not to be.
*attempts to read Shadow’s post*
*squints at big words*
*shrugs*
*leaves to attempt to body-surf Niagara falls*
I believe you can do it Brewski! Go, go, go!
(Just make sure you say “Here hold my beer and watch this sh*t!”)
On the US side right? Cuz, apparently only Americans (with a capital A) do stupid stuff to get attention …
Unless Americans includes Canadians (in North America) then, feel free to take your foolishness into Canada as well …
It doesn’t matter, Americans excel at doing stupid things when travelling abroad!
*yells at Parisian waiter*
Garcon! Garcon!!! How about some service, here? And why isn’t my pizza cut into pieces for me??? You call this a restaurant?! You don’t even have an English menu!!
I’m going to Paris next month and I’m scared they’re going to be mean to me, my accent’s ok but my French is terrible. The Germans I met were pretty exasperated when I even tried to speak German.
*applauds*
Well said, Shadow, well said.
*Nods head in agreement*
Nicely done, Shadow!
Careful!
You spelt “through” the American way!
That would be because…
I’m an American.
Whoops. Reply fail. Thought you were responding to me.
Carry on.
S’ok, you can still fundraise for the The Who-The-Hell-Knows-Foundation
I already do. We’re having a dinner party this coming weekend.
And my invitation got lost in the mail, hmmm?!
I feel bad for laughing at this
I mean, seriously? How stupid can you get?
That’s what she said.
That’s what That’s what she said said.
Yes, I know that. That’s what she said said – “how stupid can you get?” That’s why I said that’s what she said. Because of what That’s what she said said.
See now, Ms B??
*shakes head* –
this is a said, said day
*tries to follow Judy’s logic*
*brain twists into pretzel*
*knots head* –
this is a trying, trying day
I would think it’s been more tieing…
Sorry, all. I think the problem is, I’ve still got this NKOTB song stuck in my head. It’s been there since Saturday, thanks to One Who Shall Be Nameless (But his initials are FUZZ)!!!
♫ Oh You! You light up my life! You give me hope! ♫
Hm?
ah, yes … The first time was a great time
♪♫Second one had a twist
The third and the fourth time,
I don’t wanna miss! ♫♪
ah, Judy, you’re gonna get me all choked up
Are you saying you’re into S&M, Fuzz?
Grrr… I hate Gravatar.
No comment.
^ tongued, tied
Any major dude will tell you that following Judy’s logic makes you lose it.
*catches two-two many references* –
roger roger
Not paralyzed – not funny.
in pure emo fashion the first move is to straighten his hair
i believe he’s checking for brains.
ZA, wanna give him a hand?
by that I mean help him out, feel free to keep your hand where it dangles form your wrist.
Don’t tease ZA like that! ZA is not on a diet and that’s kid is walking/talking slim fast in that respect.
Hop, hop, till you drop.
Ow, Ow, Ow. That really hurt me just to watch
Do you think this kid will grow up to be a pillar in his community?
Depends upon the breaks he gets.
I think he’ll grow up to be pilloried as an imposter
At this rate, I don’t think this kid will survive long enough to grow up.
I think you should write a column about it.
How ionic.
*squeeze*
Capital idea!
I would like to read what you scroll.
Ok, but don’t laugh at me for being such a doric.
Tuscan play at that game, toots.
I’d love to lend you two my support (entasis mine).
Are you sure you can handle both of us? You may need to send for reinforcements.
I’ll caryatid as long as long as you like.
*gooses the Admiral’s buttress*
Woop!
*tries to conceal towering presence*
I’m hoping it’ll be hard core in the end.
Would you perhaps have an interest in a fine leather?
Well, when I’m deplaning.
Is it friezing in here, or is it just me?
It’s just you. What a relief.
… WN is starting to look intaglio’d up in blue.
OH! I didn’t think you noticed us, we were in the background. (Sorry, WN!)
oh yeah, I spy with my incisive eye two true blue stone cold figures cutting, um, a rug
That future seems obelisk to me.
I marble at it, myself.
That’s gonna leave a postmark.
*snork* That’s one postal delivery that should have been cancelled.
he’s certifiable “special”
“registerting”?
don’t get me sterted
Someone’s being stertorous
poke me then to stop me sterting & stir me then to start me poking
:[
I know you’re not serious.
I’m surreptitious.
*susurrous sweet somethings inside the sheets*
♪Ah, she’s all I need all of my life
I feel so good if I just say the word
Sussudio I just say the word
Oh sussudio I just say the word
Oh sussudio Ill say the word
Sussudio oh oh oh
Just say the word♫
suss — To size up; study: “Suss out the designers in whom you are interested” (Lucia van der Post).
He’s gone postal!
lol Something worse happened to me before:
I was trying to jump over posts and the last one was a bit taller than the others and I ended up having my balls smashed…Painfully
Video or it didn’t happen.
what about this 241 lb. fish that I caught? it was THIS big. *stretches arms REALLY far*
oh no, one fell out, someone wanna hand that back I can’t seem to reach it…
I wonder if there is an unpainful way to have one’s balls smashed.
use some Hard Candy
Ah, Lensman319 and Thonggirrrrl14. What could go wrong?
when one is:
1) comatose
2) black-out drunk
3) safety (safety is always 3rd)
4) on particular controlled substances
5) covered in topical anesthetic
#5 won’t do it. Trust me. Maybe a local spinal anesthetic, but not topical!
Is this the voice of experience?
hmmmm, *ponders* good to know…. *marks in book*
Are you planning to smash someone’s balls and hopefully not hurt them? I want to see what else is in this book…
lol. This reminds me of being back in the military. In basic training one of my “fellow soldiers” paid a guy to cover his balls in IcyHot. I would have paid the $5 myself to see him cry again!
Ragdoll physics at thair best =D
Yep, was just going to comment on that.
RAGDOLL WIN!
1 step
2 step
3 ste…
*falls*
AH! The pain!
Looks like someone played too much Assassin’s Creed!
lol, that’s exactly what i was thinking!
*Thinks of the children*
Someone should put a warning sign on those posts.
I can make up a label or something, but I’ll need someone to translate it into Stupid for the final product…anybody here speak Stupid?
I don’t no……but I’ll try to translate.
Don’t walk on me or big owys
Not bad.
*squeeze*
Translation is not allowed remember!!!
Doh!
oh look, someone fell and almost broke his neck…funny
It was a close race but at the closing of the polls he seems to have fallen short.
But his voice will rise higher in defense of liberty.
He is iron willed and will not be silenced that easily. He will persist in his pursuit of freedom. (Ps *dillysqueeze*)
He’ll be swinging in the wind until he learns that, even wearing the cup of knowledge, it helps to never runneth over posts.
He has many objective points to get to, they are only a hop skip and a thump away. Being weighted down by his quest for intelligence doesn’t help though.
Changing your avatar?
I dunno… I’ve grown rather fond of the nurse.
Well, ok. I couldn’t decide between me as a silent movie still, me as a stewardess, and me in the post-apocalyptic rubber dress anyway.
Of course, it’s your avatar. It’s entirely up to you
Ok, I picked one. I do get bored easily…
I like the one you chose.
Its hawt. 
Btw, what is your tatoo of?
I’m going to let that be a mystery…
*Twilight Zone Theme*
I can’t zoom enough.
That’s what she said.
No prob Judy. Not directed at you is what he said anyways.
Ouch!!! Not funny
Stupid kid is being stupid.
PS: Why “post walk” fail? Isn’t he failing WHILE he’s walking?
Really?
?yllaeR
No. Stop right there. I will laser you.
This reverse bullsh*t always reminds me of Piers Anthony and drawckab talk in Bearing an Hourglass. Is my nerd showing, or what.
Ok ok. Here is my real statemnet:
Really?Really?
Here is my real statemnet! Malignment!
Fahigan hoygan.
Oh crap. Irish skynet?! I’ll be dead, drunk, and full of whiskey. Oh, wait…
OOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WOOOWOOO! lindseyyyyyyy in the Welsh houuuuuuuuse
hope this doofus has an organ donor card on him at all times….
I’ll take that liver right now, I don’t care how conscious he is.
Are you sure he is concious in the head(I don’t think he ever was)?
Stop making up words.
Wow, luckily, he did not stamp on his part or it’s rejected.
I shall call it the Nutcracker.
Parcour fail, soprano win!
This Mann needs to Hoff it straight to the hospital.
At least, he didn’t stamp on his part or it got rejected.
Fail.
OT:
*Trades in Laser for Plasma Cutter*
This should do nicely…
*pulls out sixguns*
*spits piece of wheat out of teeth*
*stands about fifteen feet away from Qwaz, and watches as a tumbleweed rolls through the space between*
We don’t welcome outsiders too kindly in this town, Robo-boy. I reckon you like to think you can walk the walk with them fancy little plasma cutters at your side. Let’s see what you can do with them.
*Shoots dangerously close to overhead bird, startling it into messing on Shadow’s shoulder*
Your move, cowboy.
*shoots 4 bullets through Qwaz’s head in an ‘S’ formation, all of which intentionally miss vital circuitry*
You can take that home to your motherboard… show her what a pretty little tumble you got into today.
Such violence. And I thought we were friends.
On the other hand, Hey mom! Check out my face!
*Runs home*
You can’t count anybody as a friend out here in the wild wild West. They don’t begin every URL with ‘www’ for nothin’.
*Facepalm*
Here I thought it was WallaWalla Washington.
Silly me.
*snork!*
I still think that’s quite possibly the best name anyone could ever give to a city.
I’m quite partial to Kalamazoo, myself.
I will call my city Manamanamana.
Where the heck do you live? Jay Jay Land?
I love it in Walla Tonky.
I bet there`s a Sesame St
Well its near Mil Larky.
I live in MI6. I think.
*Prepares for more epic gun battles*
*Feels mentally retarded today. (I’m so slow.)*
There is also district 9, I heard its lovely at this time of year.
I had something, but then it flew away. I ran after it, I Ran So Far Away, but I couldn’t get it.
(Note: All I can do are song puns today)
Up-Puckington
????????????????????????????????????????
(I’m very confused.)
(It’s okay though, ’cause both of us need someone to talk to right now.)
I couldn’t quite tell, did he make it all the way?
technically yes
Two pole hops, slide down third on spine, swivel on face, before flipping back onto feet from a roll.
Executed perfectly.
“Video not available” fail!
“Comment not available” fail!
Never mind, it’s working now.
♫…So I go down, and get up again
and everybody keeps me down♫
Sorry to post about nothing. I just have been low on material lately.
*buys material for Captain Obvious*
Sorry, but Money Can’t Buy Me Material. It has to come from the mind.
Here I’ll give you a subject to build
Construction
*Constructs Wikipedia funnel into Shadow’s head so he can pick up on Beatles pun*
Bet he feels crunchy. I don’t know what that means but my sister and I used to say it when we were younger…back in the late 80s early 90s.
stupid kid
Well, everybody, school starts tomorrow for me (sophomore in high school; the hazing is finally over!
…) I can’t promise I’ll be gone forever, you aren’t going to get off that lucky. 
However, barring unforseen circumstances, I am probably going to be on a lot less than I normally am, seeing as my school schedule conveniently has me leaving for school right as the FB fun heats up, and has me home right as it starts to wind down. However, I will try to be on in those odd moments when I get the chance, so, I will likely be on here when you and all the other sane folks have given FailBlog up to the trolls for another long night. I’m good to hang around here for another hour. Just enough time for me to *squeeze* all of you.
<3 this kid.
a decent Shadow without a doubt
*hugs*
Shit happens!!
I’m surprised he survived that!
Where am I?
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila… POST!
You got F’ed in the A…
That I don’t know but his IQ will only go as high as blond’s now.
He gambolled with his life!
did he died?
no hes at skwl u twat
Must be fun
Post-traumatic stress?
That pole folded his ass like a washcloth. Pole win, for sure.
Those never seem to go well do they…
Not funny. He could have seriously injured himself.
he can not walk
wow, he almost got popsicled there.
He should definitely count his blessings.. There is another very very painful way to land a post-walk bail out..
i know him lmao
wow u r an idoit
Ouch!!!
what the fluck is wrong with people?
I HATE THE COMMERCIAL AFTER EACH VIDEO.
Now I´m just skipping the videos, don´t watch them anymore.
He got folded in half
that must have hurt really badly. he flipped over the pole and hit his head
PARKOUR!
Ouch!
OUCH! he was lucky or else he wouldve broke his spine or head! but anyway, its LOL-icious!
oops! i mispelled my name
epic fail
Thank you very nice sharing
someones been playing too much assassin’s creed..
huh, such impressionable minds
owch!
LOL! What a retard, I bet he failed once and the concussion made him retarded SO HE KEPT TRYING TO DO IT
Sorry dude you aint to Altair
EZIO AUDITORE
its called a front-side scorpion
its called the front-side-scorpion