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not light enough …
… now there won’t be enough light.
Physics, do your thang!
Say buddy, you got a light?
Sorry, I don’t.
Only got gravity…
Pole dancing… fun for the entire family. Liability insurance recommended.
WARNING: Your boob might or already have be/been bitten.
Very illuminating.
You could practically SEE the little light bulb over that guy’s head when he had this idea.
When it crashed underfoot you could see how dim it was in the end.
He get’s this often, it’s his lightmotif.
*hangs onto side of “t” and grabs extra ” ‘ “*
Electrifying performance AA.
Emp – would you enlighten us on the pool construction project?
Judy – Emp’s house was hit by a tornado and I am sure the pool project has been put off for now (sadly).
OMG! I’m so sorry to hear about that! I feel embarrassed for asking about something so relatively insignificant now as a pool.
They can just be thankful that none of them were swept to the land of Oz. A tornado would be terrifying. I’m glad I don’t live in a tornado-prone area.
*lives in a tornado-prone area*
*hasn’t had a tornado warning all summer*
*knocks wood*
Judy- no need to feel embarrassed, it was nice of you to ask him, and you can’t know everything in the world!!!!
She…she can’t?
I…I’m so disillusioned!
*cries*
*pat, pat, pat*
*hands Dragon a ShamWow to soak up the tears*
*WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK!!!*
*sniffle*
Theng-kew.
I have often thought that if I knew everything I would know enough to not to let anyone to know.
(So I either am a great actress or I don’t have this problem)
I think that if I knew everything, I would lose the will to live. What would be the point?
Food. Food would be the point.
That, and the company of good friends.
Two very strong arguments NS.
Teach. Surely not everyone would know everyting – so you could teach (and eat too of course – I agree with NS food, family and friends)
I wonder if that is how the christian God would feel – this is so boring *checks watch* or would it be like watching your favorite movie… again?
Would it be all of his everything or only all of our everything?
I have a pool in the Hotel Judy so I am still getting my fill, … I guess.
This is the way to teach your kids, don’t let them learn themselves.
That’s hardly a light approach to parenting…
gravity brings me down!
There is no such thing as gravity. Everything sucks.
I laugh at gravity all the time! Ha ha! Gravity!
Fighting gravity with levity…that’s brilliant Ms B!
It requires a suspension of disbelief that most people cannot achieve.
(And I didn’t even bother wearing socks today, since I knew they’d be coming right off!)
I’m up here in the bell tower…[ratchet sounds]…finished!
*zips down line to tandem flying harness*
One suspension of disbelief ready for a shakedown cruise.
hmmm…. no takers. I’m surprised, I would have thought that someone here would be willing to take that ride.
Everything blows.
What is this? SmokingBlog?
Thar, thar.
So who’s the butt of these jokes? He sounds like a fag
The smoked lamp prey.
sounds fishy. fortunately, my puter’s olfactory nerve is busted.
More like “Darwin, do your thang!”
no Award unless he dies. Can’t even say that he died trying to die.
…or made in China
Thought it would work, but now he’s enlightened.
I got a charge out of his light brigade.
I wonder if this was his first post on Fail Blog?
He would have benefited from more moderation.
He’s a member of the illumin-not-tee.
That pole was lumen high above, just his lux that it all comes crashing down.
Balance beam…you’re doing it wrong.
*crosses out “you’re” and replaces with “he’s”*
I’m a bit light on smarts today.
His vaultage was low…that’s why he got pommeled.
And he delighted in his pommeling.
Brilliant! That’s what you get for horsing around.
vaultage? watts up with that?
Vertical Balance Beam — new Olympic sport (and fun for the whole family) – team try outs continue ….
HEY WHO WANTED SEE ME?
No one. In fact we’d be considerably happier if we hadn’t seen you. Sort your post out:
Step 1. Turn off caps lock
Step 2. Use a preposition
Step 3. Actually, just don’t post at all.
This is why god invented photoshop.
Lamp Post Fail…
Vandalism Win
Which way is it to Spare Oom from here?
*meditates*
The way to Oom lies along the Path of Enlightment, O lost one.
*lights up*
There are shortcuts.
The way to the Ohm is the path of least resistance.
shocking!
The lost dude in the video has some mental incapacitance.
Not good at inductive reasoning.
That fixture had a nasty recoil.
I am trying to resistor from laughing. Watt a good one.
Re-Volting!
The fixture was rigidness-Ampered.
That was ver-ray funny, Aja!
I am current-ly reduce-d to a stifled laughter at work, but watt a series of puns!
You mean short circuits?
No disassemble! NO disassemble!
Johnny 5 alive!
clickie!
*curls up into fetal position, crying quietly to self*
*Steals Johnny 5’s Pants*
*Runsawaywithmoderatequickness*
Eeek! Will watch it once I’m not at work.
Me too. You gotta warn us, Suzie!!!
So sorry!!!!!
Didn’t realize I put the wrong one in the clickie…
Here, this one is much better…
*snork!*
Everything you need at LOW, LOW PRICES!
*snork*
It’s like an episode of Pimp my Robot.
One of my favorite spots in the movie…
I don’t know about that. I think I liked the first clickie better.
Yup, me too.
I’m glad I read your warnings before I clickied…
My second one is much better…
It’s safe
Why are people who hate everything so much funnier on tv?
*closes eyes*
*takes a deep breath*
*taps sneaker heels together*
There is no place like Oom There is no place like Oom.
Ecept Om of course, but you wouldn’t want to go there…
Dude. Not cool. :[
(Homer) Simpson said it.
I know. That was the joke.
D’oh!
Of course the Shadow knows.
Of course.
Actually, I think Homer would’ve said, “Mmmmmmm, lamp post.” *drool*
Nope. If it was him he would have said,
“Weeeeeeee! I’m the king of world! Look boy! Come see what your old man can do!!”
*Crack*
“Doh!!!!”
“It was like that when I got here.”
Bad fail.
, no biscuit.
That’s ok it was soggy anyway.
♪ Wake up momma, turn your lamp down low ♪
♫ When the lights go out in the city…♪
♫The Wolverines start to invade♪
♫Turn the lights off, turn the TV on….♫
♫Dim all the lights sweet darling ’cause tonight it’s all the way♪
♫Hey now, All you sinners; put your lights… off♫
♫ Bright lights, big city… Gone to my baby’s head ♪
♪We cannot be so blind, Hear their cries. Don’t wait ’til daylight dies♪
That seemed a bit darker than I had intended.
♫With the shadow of the day…♫
The lamp post breaking almost makes it’s own rimshot sound
Timbal!!
Nice to see you’re drumming up some puns here, Admiral.
Lets see if we can snare a few more.
*does Bruce Lee impersonation*
Hi-Hat!!
*puts the kettle on*
C0cktail (drums) will be ready soon!
*drives up in Dodge Coronet with a “Honk if You’re Horny” bumper sticker*
What are we bassing the punrun on?
hehehe… my old band had one of those – hand made though – on the back of our trailer.
One day on the highway a convertible Mercedes went speeding by us – two attractive young things – with the driver holding the horn down as they passed us, both of them smiling.
Ahh, those were the days…
Please don’t pun-ish me for breaking the run – consider it reinstated
* Drives up in a sallean with a “HONK if you hate car horns & a “No gas crissis In This Car” which shows a guy farting with the comennt in the fart bubble and the licence plate saids”BEANY”Bumper Stickers* Hey I Made them!
I’ll set the tabor for our guests.
Put’s the kettle on.
Cocktail (drums) will be ready soon!
*brushes drummies with sauce*
That’s totally not how you’re supposed to rub the lamp.
What was he trying to do anyway?
Obviously trying to summon the genie of the lamp. Instead, he summoned security.
He took it seriously when someone told him that he could work his pole to find enlightenment.
Make a wish.
*closes eyes and wishes for cookies*
Guuuyyysss! I just found this plate of cookies in my fridge! You want some?
WOOHOO! It works!
*closes eyes and wishes for a million
dollarsinternets*Just how big do you think my fridge is?!
Oh OK, I’ll just have some cookies then.
*om nom nom*
Hey, who filled the local cemetery with all these internets? It’s getting hard to climb out of my grave now with all this junk getting in my way!
Ummmm…
*points*
Look at that delicious giant brain behind you!
*flees*
*sighs*
*gives Scott some DE*
Blasted fleas!
*stops scratching*
Phew! Thanks.
Maybe you should hit me with some of that DE too Gracie, everyone near me seems to catch flees.
*gives ZA some DE*
G’night Gracie. I’m outta here.
*flips switch on monitor*
*attempts sideways hang off cube wall*
CRASH!
See you all tomorrow!
*haveagoodnightsqueeze*
*onelastsqueezeforBrewski*
*squeezes for everybody else ’cause they’re still here*
*good night squeezes everyone*
*I’mleavingnowgoodnightsqueezesforall*
Ooh, cookies!
*eats cookie*
Yay! *crunch nom crunch* Thanks!
You’re welcome. Sharing is caring, after all.
*squeezes everybody*
I wish for the Great Pumpkin to come to the pumpkin patch tonight!
Well Here It Is! Its About To Eat Your Head off!
Lights! Camera! Action!
What do you mean we have no lights?
Not much in the way of action either.
CUT! Not the lamp, idiot!
At least the camera kept working. One out of three isn’t that bad, is it?
He meant to do that.
He wasn’t very polite about it.
He seemed rather dim witted, if you ask me.
A dullard, perhaps?
Socket to me!
Sokkit to me!
Ooooh, you turn me on when you talk like that, Brewski!
Keep in mind, you’re saying that when his pants are still off.
Grr… forgot to add (switched to). Totally removed the pun.
And you always know how to flip my switch, you radiant little thang!
*glows*
*beams with happiness*
*squeezes friends*
I’m delighted to see you, my old friend.
SOCKETTOMESOCKETTOMESOCKETTOMESOCKETTOME!
Lamp post fights back, news at 11.
*snork!*
Reminds me of the Kentucky Fried Movie.
“I’m not wearing any pants. Film at 11.”
Wow. I haven’t even seen that movie. It sounds right up my alley.
You could be the star.
*squeezegoose*
CATHOLIC HIGH SCHOOL GIRLS IN TROUBLE!!
I remember it being a high-larious movie, but do keep in mind that was at least 25 years ago.
32 in fact, 3 years before Zucker, Zucker & Abrahams put out Airplane!
I MEANT 25 years since I saw it.
I’m pretty sure my parents wouldn’t have let me go see it when I was seven. :p
It’s definitely not child friendly. I only get to watch it when my girls aren’t home. Still had to own it, though.
I vaguely remember my oldest brother saying it was hilarious, but I was way too young to see it. It might have warped my innocent young mind, and turned me into a deranged maladjusted adult who frequently strips naked on public blogs.
Hmmmmm. Are you sure you never watched it?
And just what are you implying?? Hmmm?
♫ Born free, as free as the wind blows! ♪
Sorry, I was just trying to be helpful, and point out it was made by the guys who made Airplane!.
Would you like an apology cookie?
I know my parents didn’t let me see it when I was 5.
You were helpful. I was the one who wasn’t clear enough.
*takes a cookie and offers Scottie a different type of cookie*
It’s impossible to be unhappy when cookies are involved.
*noms*
Agreed!
*munchity-munchy-munch*
You was seven in 1932?
and
*SKA-WEEEEEZE*
of course.
*PLLLBBBBBBBBTTTTTTTTT-squeeze*
Oh, you are SO asking for it.
*quickie-squeeze*
It’ll take a lot more until we’re even.
*salutesqueeze*
I don’t even want to think about it.
Hehehe! You know I can’t be mad at you two. And even if, I lack the skills to compete against either of you.
Pfft! As if I’d believe that.
*hugglesqueeze*
*heartyembrace-keepingoneeyeoutovermyshoulder-squeeze*
*up your alley*
*Snork!*
Unintentional. You all have dirty minds.
:p
We glory in that.
As well we should.
We have our priorities, you know.
Hmm. Brewski with no pants…again. A lamp post. A movie. Brewski thinks things sound “right up his alley”…….
Uhh ohh!
*RunsAway*
*snork*
Thanks Gracie. I hadn’t thought of that movie in ages.
Clickie for the trailer.
I’ve gotta rent that one!
See if you can find Amazon Women on the Moon, too. It’s just as funny! I own KFM, but I still need to find Amazon Women.
Two glaring omissions from my DVD collections. It looks like Amazon dot com has Amazon Women Gracie.
Ooh, thanks! Must go shopping soon.
*squeeze*
Gracie, I’m impressed! KFM!!
*shakes large rubber penis at jury*
“Article 17 of the penal code says…”
Yet again someone here shows me how I have missed another good movie. I think it was K or Avis I have to thank for showing me the way to “Blazing Saddles”. LMAO!
Any recommendation for a Mel Brooks flick is a good recommendation.
That’s true. Crazy people are always more interesting and entertaining. Just look at FailBlog.
*looks at FailBlog*
*is entertained*
Hey! Who are you to talk to me like that?
See! I rest my case. There are crazy people here like Napoleon who think that Gracie is talking to him because she looked in his direction. They have split personalities like Arthur and such too.
Me? I’m normal….I just live in my own little world, but that’s ok because they know me there.
I hope I’m not confusing genders again.. All these people with multiple personalities makes it hard to tell who’s a he or a she…….
Then again…. Never mind.
Hey now, don’t look at me with that text of voice.
Tourist gets lightheaded hanging around local park
The Unbearable Lightness of Being …an idiot.
Sorry about your concussion. By the way, here’s the bill for the lamp post that you broke.
What a de-lightful fail.
I am starting to feel light-headed.
The obvious result of being so light on your feet.
Maybe someone should help shed light on that feet thing.
I know. It fil(ament)s me with mirth.
Watt was he thinking?
That guy obviously isn’t very bright.
Not the brightest bulb in the box.
Not the brightest light on the x-mas tree.
Yeah, that guy wasn’t too bright, was he.
Jinx!
(Actually, refresh fail.)
Maybe he thought he’d find some joules.
Jules? I am(p) certain he’s around here somewhere.
He’s currently looking for pants.
So am I, as it so happens.
*taps foot whilst glaring at Gracie*
Wire you breaking the pun run?
Sorry… I could not resistor saying that.
Thin hardware your pants are
*Think
He’s not wearing pants? Shocking!
Film at 11.
You sure you don’t mean at elebenty?
Must be recharging his batteries for the late fail.
We should get a refund. (Light)switch him out for a model that works.
*facepalm*
Namechange fail…
*bukkit*
I wondered watt the Grammar Police were doing here!
*squeeze*
Trust me, when it’s time…
They’ll be here!
Pfft. I’m not worried about the Grammar Police, it’s the Grammar Poice that get me nervous!
Power to the people!
It’s what the people want.
Clearly, this guy does not work for Motel 6.
We won’t leave the light on for ya…hope you can see in the dark.
Tom Bodett? He’s an occasional on the NPR show Wait Wait… Don’t Tell Me!. It’s a great radio show, btw.
ht tp://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=35
Oh, I LOVE that show!! Unfortunately, I always miss it! I should download the podcasts.
Download “This American Life” while you’re at it. I love Ira Glass.
Did you go to the live show a few months ago? It played in movie theaters around the country. Good time.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. Smart NPR peeps.
*is happy*
*squeeze!*
Hey MRN! Wait Wait is doing a live show in Boston next month, I was thinking of going.
MRN, I did, in fact, see the show live.
I ♥ Wait, wait! I listen to the podcast every week, along with Car Talk and This American Life.
PBS is sooo great!
Doh! I mean NPR! NPR, PBS same thingie, right?! *headdesk*
It’s okay. It just means Carl Kasell won’t do the greeting on your answering machine.
WAITWAITWAIT! SHOW IS COMING ON!
Maybe I shouldn’t reveal this (although it’s info publicly available on the Web), but if you really like his voice, he’s the vice-chair of the Board of Selectmen for his home town in VT. I wonder if people go to the meetings just to hear him speak?
hmmm, well. it just wasn’t as sturdy as it looked, I guess….
I wish there was a District 9 poster nearby: Lamp Post for Humans Only.
Maybe there was, and he took it too literally.
Maybe it was the post taker from the post fail.
Aculley I Saw This Bus And On It It Said BUS FOR HUMANS ONLY! it Was FUNNY!
headlines read, “Escapee from mental health facility, fancies himself a Monkey, rampages park”
The headlines read that? Wow… smart newspaper.
Smarter than Vancouver’s “24 Hours”.
The breaking lamppost caught me off guard like a bolt from the blue.
That was Post-apocalyptic.
They should bar this from ever happening again.
I think we should take a pole first. Get everybody else’s opinion.
Cantilever another pun run hanging.
And how do you propose to count the volts?
Volt-meter?
Electronically.
Somebody call 9-1-1, Shorty fell and now his neck’s sore….woooo ohhhhh.
The boom times are over.
Wonder if he now suffers from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder?
He looks polish to me.
Don’t forget about the lamppost, “We need some standard bearers over here!”
♪ Hello, lamppost…whatcha knowin’?
I’m gonna break your power flowin’… ♪ ♪
♪ Ain’t cha got no shines for me?
Doot-in’ doo-doo, feelin’ woozy. ♪ ♪
Ah! An electrifying performance, as always!
*squeezies*
Simon says, give Judy a squeeze!
*squeeze!*
*
suiteSweetJudyBlueSqueezes*Apparently I’m the only one who knows how to play this game.
Apparently, GS. (But I DO have blue eyes!)
And squeezes to both of you fine gentlemen!
*squeeze*
♪ You spin me right round, baby,
right round like a rec-… ♫
*crack*
Oof!
…..Oh, say does that star-spangled man there yet waaaaaAAAAAve
hahahaha, I had a dream I did that same thing (without breaking the lamp post) last night. How funny….I forgot about it until I started watching it and it made me remember my dream. The funniest part, was I couldn’t do it one way in my dream because it was left-handed but I could do it the other way, which was right-handed in my dream….
The pole… was left-handed…
Whadufah?
All poles are left-handed…..geeez, get with the program.
Chiral pole. Perhaps boootothat is a mathematician, or is currently taking a course in organic chemistry ???
Maybe he’s the guy in the video…his comment has a heavy-handedness to it.
I believe you’re right! What made him think he could pull this off?
He was little light headed.
Someone called him a cis-sy so he had to try…we all know what trans-pired.
the guy with the camera died because a little piece of the lamp hitted him and then his friend die
I call bullshit on that.
I call bul(b)shit.
My BS light is flashing.
My BS light overloaded, melted the cover and then exploded.
… That’s what she said.
*runsawaywithaquickness*
*chases after Shadow in jeep, with giant net in hand*
Come back here, you!
*forgets jeep is riged with bom*
i think im forgetting something
Yes. You’re forgetting this.
*gives failinator his dicitionary*
*beats Failinator’s English teacher with a stick* Gasp…whew…that’s tiring.
*turns the stick on Failinator*
Unless you’re just trying to get a workout, I fear you’re wasting your time.
Well, she may be doing it for her own catharsis.
That’s a worse post than the ones on YouTube.
Oh, *snap!*
Yup, that’s what the pole did.
Exactly. Also, america sucks your all so stupid and arrogant therefore were better then u!
No america doesnt suck we saved u in ww2 and can nuke you evan tho we r ur allys USA!
fUc|< j00!
stfu n1gg@
Excuse me???
This is going off the rails.
↓↓ *sigh* ↓↓
OK, I should have read further before posting.
I’ve seen dumber posts. See above.
Never confuse weakness with stupidity.
Whoa! I thought only the pole snapped.
Was I that convincing?
TOO convincing, in my opinion. My brain almost exploded reading that comment.
It pained me so much to write it…
Please, you don’t need to do this to yourself. Now, sit down, and have a cup of tea.
Sorry, I don’t drink tea. I’m American, I don’t know how to make it right.
Fine, then.
*swaps tea for coffee*
Now, tell us what made you do it.
I was on YouTube earlier today and needed an outlet to mock the commenters and expose them for the mental retards they really are.
And in the process, it looks like I brought the judgmental types on this site crashing down on me.
You need to set your parody bit when you do that.
Well, they didn’t know you when you were a part of Grammarian’s Corner, so it’s not all that surprising, really.
I don’t blame them. That was a year ago. How long is that in Internets-time?
Eighty bazillion.
…Or 42, I can never remember.
It would have been much more clearer if you set up the fact that you were parodying some group first. Now that I get it I wouldn’t have directed my comment at you but made it more general.
You’re right. Sorry. Sometimes I have a tendency to assume that others can tell what I’m thinking about.
Join the club, we’ve got jackets.
Ooh! Ooh! I want a jacket! I want a jacket! What color are they?
*jumps up and down excitedly*
Chartreuse with mauve stripes. I went with the lowest bidder.
… I think I could pull off chartreuse.
*eyes jacket*
O.o
o.O
I think it’ll clash with my balloon reflections, but I’ll try it anyway.
*tries jacket on*
How do I look?
*whistles*
Sexy.
*takes jacket off hanger*
*festoons jacket with a myriad o’ brass baubles and ribbons*
Count me in.
Like an off-color watermelon. *thumbs up*
Same here.
*walks down runway wearing chartreuse jacket and strutting his stuff*
Well, the “People Who’ve Misjudged Me Club” jacket is rather slimming.
Slimming? Count me in, too.
That’s the name of the club? Can we change it to People Who Wear Chartreuse with Mauve Striped Jackets?
Or perhaps “People Who Can Wear Chartreuse and Mauve-Striped Jackets and Still Look Dead Sexy”.
*continues strutting stuff*
That works, too.
*struts stuff next to Shadow*
I’m leaning strongly toward “People Who Can Wear Chartreuse and Mauve-Striped Jackets and Still Look Dead Sexy and of Whom the World is Not Worthy (Plus They’re Generally Fabulous)”.
I think we have a winner.
PWCWCMSJSLDSWWNW(PTGF) it is, then.
Amazing. It just rolls off the tongue.
Hooray!! *squeezes everybody*
That’s gonna cost a fortune in embroidery, though.
Who cares? We’re fabulous, and dead sexy. We deserve it.
Who’s dead sexy? ZA?
Hey that acronym actually looks like a word in Welsh!
Can I get my jacket with the arms tied around the back? Those are so comfy. It’s like you’re always giving yourself a squeeze.
One jacket, super long sleeves, extra buckles and zippers, and stain resistant coating. Check.
*Dons Jacket*
*Struts stuff.*
This jacket is cool, let just create a jean model.
Too bad the educational system has apparently failed.
Proper grammar: NO
Correct spelling: NO
Coherent communcation of ideas: NO
*weeps for the future*
Sometimes I hate my generation.
*joins nightshayde in weeping*
NS, unfortunately he exists now. So I weep for us in the present. ;p
Did you not catch that I was parodying your average Youtube comment?
Nope I don’t read Youtube comments. Not until this gets invented.
http:// xkcd.com/481/
*snorkroffle!*
I don’t think that would help. They already instituted something similar, and nobody cares about it. I guess that’s because they don’t make it mandatory.
The virus would make it pretty mandatory.
Realize it could backfire. The mentality of the average youtube poster would likely enjoy having their inane diatribe vocalized back to them. It would make them feel – something. Something other than the fear that their mommies will catch them using her computer without permission again.
Oh, and they could just turn down or mute the volume so she couldn’t hear it.
ROFL! Nicely put!
Not sure if that would be enough for most…
*hefts shellacked mackrel*
Nope. I think I’ve only looked at YouTube three or four times, and have never read comments there.
I have, you aren’t missing anything.
I’ve only looked at YouTube three or four times today and still don’t read the comments. You are correct, very depressing.
nightshayde, it’s hard to have a global force of worker bees if they’re educated, think logically, know how to communicate, and know their history. Hence, the dumbing down of America.
I weep along with you.
I agree. But America was too educated, and people used to know history (and you know what they say about those who don’t know history). And the plan is definitely global, so America needed to be brought down or those pesky freedom-loving Americans would never have put up with what’s coming.
Ah well. It WAS a nice ride while it lasted.
I would counter that, but can’t find any logical basis to do so. Curse my public-school education!
LOL
Well, here’s to bread and circuses!
*raises a glass*
Can we have shiny, sparkly, thingys also?
From each according to his abilities to each according to his needs.
Ahem.
What about the “hers” around here??
Them too
I don’t think that was part of the manifesto. Crazy communists!
To free, rational thought! We shall carry on your legacy! You shall not have died in vain!
Then you shall not have been mortally wounded in vain!
Saw it coming, lol’d anyhow.
Wha?
They dont make lamposts like they used to
see kids, this is what happens when you mistake the sound of FIBERGLASS for metal and try to hang from the object.
I hope he cut himself on the glass lenses
almols week end woo hoo
I bet he had been playing with the pole dancing doll too long … so that is a irrepairable damage (that the lamp post had to suffer
) 
Should’ve paid attention to the fact that the light bulb over his head was burned out…
*shakes fist angrily at gravity*
*watches in horror as gravity suddenly increases and sucks technicolor into the ground*
Uh-oh – ZA’s not going to like this invasion of his territory….
*flees thread*
*gives Judy some DE*
Just when you think the infestation is under control!
*shakes head*
Not sure ZA will appreciate being referred to as an infestation.
No, no, no. Not ZA. The fleas, silly!
*squeeze*
*not sure he was*
*browser refresh fail*
*squeeze*
Why? All are welcome, all welcome … wait a second, he’s not dead yet! Damn you living folk anyway, be patient!
*drags Technicolor out of the ground, kicking and screaming*
*tells him not to return until he calms down*
lol he got ownend hahaha!!!
llolll he got owned rofllll
*headdesk*
*x5*
*realizes it’s not enough*
And to think this guy owns the site.
I would venture to say that is the only thing he/she owns.
No, he owns end. He said so himself.
*invokes his power of disbelief*
He doesn’t look like a site owner. Besides, if he really owned this site wouldn’t he be able to afford a keyboard where the ‘l’ key doesn’t stick?
*puts stack of pillows between Shadow’s head and his desk*
*sobs quietly into pillow*
Hey! That’s my pillow! You can have it now that it’s covered in Shadow slober.
*sobs loudly into pillow*
*Gently lifts Shadow’s head from pillow*
*Sobs are unmuffled*
Hey, you can make a tune with this!
*Raises and lowers Shadow’s head to make the “Jurassic Park” Theme*
…
*Is also ashamed*
*snork*
Some people are just that talented.
*waits ’til Shadow starts next head bang; yanks pillows out*
*is ashamed of himself*
WN! You should be ash….
…Oh wait. You already are.
Okey-doke! Nemmind!
Here is a very appropriate xkcd comic.
*clickie*
When did the city council start contracting Hobby Lobby for public utilities?
Hmm… that explains the HO-scale subways.
If you are a city official you will want to hunt this moron down for a vandalism charge and payment for the damages….
hope they get’em.
Alternatively, if you’re a flying monkey you will want to fly around and around this maroon while the Wicked Witch cackles “…and your little lamp post too!” from a high altitude.
If you are a dove you would be angry that your favorite place to sit was destroyed. You would probably shit on that guy.
Watt does he think he’s doing?
Seriously. :[
We are very serious. :[
:[
*poke*
*hands on hips*
:[
*tries to stay very :[*
*fails :]*
I amp retty sure he thought he could do it right.
Just popping back in to say hi. Hi!
And have any of you guys been to peopleofwallmart (dot) com yet? No? Then go! But keep the eye bleach handy. It’s totally work safe, but SCARY!!
I tried earlier, apparently there is too many people trying to hit the site that it crashed the internets.
…are so many people…
See, I told you I needed a frosty beverage.
*steals root beer from Brewski*
Here ya go.
ummmm, do you have anything with a little less root and more beer?
*extracts root*
Here you go. Pure root. Pure beer. Light up and drink.
Well, its gota taste better than Milwaukee.
*drinks*
Hey…I grew up in Milwaukee.
I was born in Milwaukee (Oregon).
I finally made it through all the pages (there are only 6 or 7) and OH MY GOD is it disturbing! The one titled “Thank God I Live In America” or something like that is the worst of them. You’ll know it when you see it. The caption uses the word “delicious”. It is by no means a word I would have used in reference to that particular picture.
Aaahhh! Someone pass the mentalfloss!
I’d be happy to!!
(forgot to say “clickie!” ^^^)
I hope I don’t bump any strings doing this.
Try to clickie if you couldn’t view Avis link. Believe me, if it works for you you won’t want to thank me….unless you like the stripper one as much as I do.
Thanks for that, it’s amazing how one little extra ‘l’ can make such a difference. I should have known how to fix it, but:
1. It was a real site, not a 404
AND
2. What can I say, I’m brain-dead.
I love that sites icon.
;(
I didn’t link to it, I merely suggested you go to the site! :p
I’m hooked… I’m also terrified! What is with these people?
*shakes head in disbelief*
Pimpin ain’t easy at the walmart.
OMG.
RIGLMAO!
*hoping I don’t get fired*
I might *flies through another window*
is in serious need of a frosty beverage.
*hands b2th a frosty ale*
asks for 1 too
Nachoking19962?
You take one down and pass it around.
I see.
*apologizes to Nachoking19960*
*passes 1 around*
It appears our math doesn’t agree.
But then, math is only a matter of opinion.
*snickers*
I wish my math teachers would have agreed with Verizon.
*sigh*
You’d think the emperor of France wouldn’t care about his math teachers.
Teehee!
*extracts a “1″ from Nachoking19961*
*hands “1″ to Nachoking1996*
No choking on that 1 now!
He obviously thought before doing that ‘I fil-a-ment al episode coming on’
Now that is NOT what I call “Hang Time”
LOL hangin
Am I the only one or right before crashing, he let out a fart?
No, I heard that one too. He farted.
HEY! THAT WAS MY SCHOOL ART PROJECT! I MADE A REALISTIC LAMP POST!
Hmmm.
You failed to design it so that it could hold up a full sized man trying to hang off of it horizontally, but you succeeded at making it look like a real lamp post and that’s the most important thing in art. In fact, it was convincing enough to sucker our test moron into trying to hang off of it horizontally.
A-
NICELY DONE!
Thank you.
*squeeze*
*smells smoke*
Awww, ZA — you borked my sarcasm detector.
I really hope I can find a new one this close to a three-day-weekend.
*sigh*
ZA posted a circular link!!! Arghhh….. can’t get away!
Well, we already knew you were loopy.
*hands Elsa_Mama a drink*
*Grabs drink – uses leverage to pull out of the loop* Thanks DW — sorry for spilling that on you … whatg was it anyway?
*asks nicely*Can I have a drink?
Sorry — I spilled it pulling out of the clicky loop …
Thats ok. *takes the drink* Thank you.
*squeeze*
What kind of drink was it?
I got some pop.
Ohh sorry there Qwaz — it will grow back — next month??
*I moved up a “reply” to try to bring on down — did it work??*
*sigh*
It would be really nice to have something on here that allowed you to not see posts from specific people.
Really nice. Especially at this hour.
Hey DW — is that the drink you were handing me? Or, did STS CCC lick up someone else’s drink???
Nightshade!! Are you advocating *gasp* censorship??? LOL …. I have mixed feeling about the triple C …
It would be really, really, really nice, nightshayde.
And Elsa_Mama, I have your very own drinkie refill right here…and anyone who tries to take it will have to deal with the *FOOOOOM!!*
Actually, no — not censorship (well – not in this case, anyway). Just something that would let each user see/not see posts from other users. Facebook has such a thing, as do some message boards.
I’m all for TPTB (the powers that be) banning people for making sexist/racist/homophobic/etc… comments. I don’t think people should (necessarily) be banned for merely being annoying or socially inept. What annoys one person may well amuse another & I’m ok with that.
Yum!! My favorite drinkie — tank and jeeps DW… *slurp* (I love straws) … that hit the spot!!
Yeah, the masking tape I’m using has some drawbacks.
*MMPH!*
‘Zackly. No one is saying annoying people can’t post. Just that it would be really great if there were a way to block their posts from my own Failblog experience.
And there’s more where that came from, Elsa_Mama!
The only problem with un-seeing a single person’s comments is when others aren’t ignoring them. A lot of things would start to look out of context. Kind of like when people reply to their own moderated comment and a terrible nesting fail occurs. Noone really knows what’s going on or who’s talking to whom.
*snerk*
you could try white-out …
I’m willing to take that risk, Chan.
Welcome, Admiral & Qwaz & Chan!
*squeezes to those who just entered*
*gives a round of squeezes to failfriends*
Yea — I think I am going to need it tomorrow …
*squeezies!*
Um AA… did you tape Qwaz’s mouth by mistake???
That would probably be his parents doing.
*Rips tape off*
GAH! What little facial hair I had… Gone!
Just wondering since his “MMPM” was after you were taping the screen ….
Ohh sorry there Qwaz — it will grow back — next month??
*I moved up a “reply” to try to bring on down — did it work??*
NOPE — didn’t oh well!
*Squeezes for all failpeople still hanging around this evening*
How is everyone?
Still working, but in a good mood. As soon as I finish the work I need to do, my five-day weekend begins.
I’m going to a scrapbooking retreat for a couple of nights — very much looking forward to it.
How are you tonight, Chan?
I have not been on a scrapbooking weekend in ages!! Is it Creative Memories or something else? Have a great time!
Ooh, have fun nightshayde! My long weekend starts at about 2pm tomorrow…wheeeeee!
Very cool. A scrapbooking retreat sounds awesome.
*Jealous of all the people with long weekends*
I’m wiped but good. This whole school-then-work thing takes a toll!
Yes, E_M — it’s Creative Memories. I love all the toys!
DW — is the obnoxious student still being a pain in your scales?
Chan — yup … school + full-time work can be awfully challenging. Don’t work yourself too hard!
Oh, goodness, no. I’ve got my priorities straight! I do the minimum I can at work, and put all my good effort into school.
‘S the only way to do it. I’m just starting to lose out on lots of sleepy-time.
I hope your retreat goes well! I’m sure you’ll have lots of fun.
Nightshayde: *SNORK!* Yesterday, the PITA student actually asked me this question:
“So…can I break up my thesis sentences with other sentences that aren’t related to the thesis?”
Me: “…Um, why would you have unrelated sentences in your thesis?”
Him: “Well, not unrelated, but sentences that the reader wouldn’t understand. You know, until later, when you explained them.”
Me: “Well, that would be an organizational problem. You don’t ever want to confuse your reader, so you need to organize your sentences so they create a logical progression of information.”
Him: “So…you’re saying that I can’t break up my argument with other sentences, then? Even if the reader might be able to figure out what I mean by them?”
Me (Being very careful not to sound exasperated or condescending): “The bottom line is this…it isn’t your reader’s responsibility to figure out what you are trying to say. It is YOUR responsibility as a writer to communicate your ideas and claims clearly to the reader. So no…don’t put in anything that will confuse your reader.”
Him: “Okay!”
Lol!
Sounds like he’s trying to play “deep, mysterious, and intelligent”, and coming off as “pretentious and irritating” instead…
I used to be a CM consultant!! I have enough stuff to last the rest of my life!! We should have a scrapbooking party here … Road trip to Chicago anyone?
LOL! Good description, Chan … and nice job not *FOOMing* the guy, DW.
DW — does he think he is a creative writing class and is trying to write a mystery??? LOL – I know all about trying to talk to someone without conveying that you think they are hmmm less than intelligent. I am not sure I could teach.
My brother teaches physics – he loves the students that come to his office and ask “So, what can I do to raise my grade?” And then flee when he pulls out extra-credit problems. He does not even want to know what they were expecting him to offer.
I definitely need to visit Chicago one of these years, EM. Among other things, my husband and I simply NEED to see a baseball game in each of the stadia… and I want to visit the Museum of Science and Industry… and I know there’s amazing food to be had.
Maybe you could use some of your CM stuff to make an amazing tribute album.
*MEGA-SQUEEZE*
Just ’cause.
MEGA SMOOOCHES — cuz you are you!!
*squeeze*
Jazz (my 16 mos old Springer Spaniel) thinks he is a mountain goat. He is running all over the house following the trails the cats have left, even it means climbing the back of the couch and perching on the top of cabinets … *sigh*
He has never fully uinderstood why there is a difference between the floor and any other flat surface he can physically get to.
Is there a difference?
My cats don’t think so. Neither does my child, come to think of it.
Probably not — but it is still funny to look over and see him perched on the top of something where his feet barely fit. Goofy thing! And you can’t block him — he sees all barriers and just a new fun puzzle to solve. When he figures it out he is very proud and usually comes to tell me — or show me what he found … *Hey mom — look I got that thingy you hid in the boig puzzle!*
Please give Jazzy a skritch behind the ears (if he likes that) from cyber-Auntie Nightshayde!
Jazzy likes EVERYTHING!! He is the happiest creature on the face of the earth! Everything is fun or can be made to be fun …
Surprisingly it can be a little annoying sometimes (but never for very long)
THE BLOGGER ||| A blog for the world
*blogs*
G-O-O-D Evening everyone!
*squeeze*
That was a fail just WAITING to happen.
That was a fail just READY to happen.
The fail that was ready to happen.
Completely OT…
Isn’t he awesome?
Great stuff, it reminds me a little of The Killers.
errr its called GRAVITY!!!
That was a bright Idea !
En-light-ening.
That was too risky you know. That guy is too strong like Hercules for breaking up the lamp post. He might learn the law of gravity there.
*makes note of it*
I would like to see a video of him doing that with a pole that can handle it (not meant to be dirty).
“your never going to be a flag, you aren’t light enough!”
*guys falls*
I know I’m kinda late, so I’ll just add that the YouTube video on FailBlog offices was very enlightening.
BTW, do we still do the office thing here in the community?
*slept for hours wakes up to the sound of the guy falling* Hey. How are you doing?
Random, Obscure video time.
I miss this movie. After taking a baseball bat to my VHS I want to buy a new one simply because of this clip.
Well that was a bright idea.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWW!!!
Pigs can’t fly!
This is not a lampost fail. The torsional stress placed upon the lampost exceeded its design limits, as it was not designed to resist the stress of this scenario. The lampost was clearly abused by the person in the video, who intentionally and recklessly excceeded the torsional strees of the lampoost.
Comment Fail
Lamp post fail…. or Vandalism Win?
LOL… N00B
Is this guy looking for work? We have way too many lights near our observatory that could use this treatment.
when did jackie chan go viral?
Poor lamppost! Is it okay? SOMEONE DO CPR NOW!! HURRY, I can see the light going out of it!
Why did this guy do that anyway? What was he trying to accomplish in the first place? or is that also part of the fail?
0:11
*Hulk smash*