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Cheezburger Company Blog
meh — “touching people’s private parts,” high school musical gangsta wanna be, vacuum hose in a child’s butt — this must be 12 year-olds’ humor day on Failblog
No, it’s cool.
YES!!! FINALLY A PICTURE F#CKING A KID IN THE ASSS!!!
*whacks !!!FIRST!!! with troll-bashing mallet*
*kicks !!!FIRST!!! into the vat of boiling Baconlube*
Sorry…Leila wasn’t here and I had to do it!
Speaking of whom, where is she?!
Let’s bash some vacuum boys!
oh shit …
oh snap…
Is that Patrick Wilson?
its patrick swayze**in bubbles tone of voice**
Proof that marriage is evil!!!!!
For some, yes…right now, they’re all twitterpated…clickie
Try this clickie…*ugh*
marry me, Brewski!! *squeeze*
… uses bbq lighter to set bacon lube on fire. …
OVER 9000!!!!!!
You have named youself after one of the most fail filled actions a human can perform. I do belive that means you inherit some of the fail from said action, therefore, you have failed before doing anything else.
Well, at least the kid is enjoying it.
So you’re saying “FAILBLOG FAIL”?
I loved the “Hit and Run Fail” over the weekend. That was the best fail in a long time, IMO.
I loved the BMW
WINfail.Yes, my 12 year old son thought the BMW fail was hilarious, especially since he learned the double meaning of the word a$$…
Hehehe! Same for me!
I also didn’t know that a donkey is an ass. You live and you learn.
That must have been a great day for you!
Are you saying we’ve been invaded??
You think this Fail sucks?
Nah, it blows…
It sucks ass.
Too true…
the kid’s face is priceless
NOW THATS SUM FUNNY SHIT
Getting the potato out 101.
My, what a young vicar he is!
So do you want fries with that shake?
LMAO
*refuses*
*Snickers*
*Twix*
*Baby Ruth*
*Cowgirl Steak from Wolf Lodge*
Clickie
You came to my house and took photos…
how did you get past security?
Boy, that makes my lunch look…dull…
Like how they have the steam rising from the steak…
Family recipe…
Really, how did you guys get past security?
Ummm, we walked right in?
Screw it.
*leaves*
*throws keys to SuzieQ*
You can have it, btw Wensday is Nacho Night.
*rofl!*
hahahahahaha!
he’s a real chip off the old block
the potato never falls far from the…… potato tree
The vicar always falls on the potato. (Could this become a new saying? I see potential!)
I’ll definitely try to spread it here! Could become quite popular among green grocers and the clergy
there’s a prune joke here somewhere but I’m just not there yet.
That kid got hosed.
Hoser!!!
It’s a part kid part vaccuum machine!
Well that sucks…
Hey! I was going to say that!
*squeeze*
Mornin’, Bearly, Arthur, Fuzz, BF!
AND Brewski AND SuzieQ!
Morning, Judy! *Squeeze!*
Mornin’ Judy!
*squeeze*
…and everyone she said…! *squeeze*
*squeezes Judy*
How’s your weekend been?
Awesome! Went to my sisters yesterday and all four of us tie-dyed t-shirts to wear to the family reunion in Illinois in 2 weeks.
I wish I had such a good weekend! It rained through Saturday and Sunday! GRRRR. Ah, well.
Ah, you’re back in London?
Hee! Not yet. I’ll be back by the end of the week! Back to inefficient transport, sunless weekends and good old England.
Wow, Brewski, I didn’t know you were so close! I’m in New Hampshire.
Cool! I’m a bit West of there, though. Have you ever been to any Anime Conventions?
*pops into thread*
Just a drive-by *SQUEEEEEZE* for my failpeeps before I head over to campus for a day of enlightening young minds!!
See you on the late fail.
*pops back out*
Phoo. I hope you’ll try again.
I couldn’t stand it. It felt like 56k again.
Have a nice day!
Will do…you too!
*gottagobyeSQUEEZE!*
Wow, hate to catch ya right as you’re walking out the door. See you later, Dragon. *squeeze*
Oh guys, stop that gesqueezels all right, that’s annoying and childish!
Morning Shadow!
*squeeze*
How was your weekend??
G’morning, m’lady. *squeeze*
Not bad. Bit tired is all, and I got to see Failblog in all its weekend glory, but overall… not to bad. Yours?
Um… anyone got an extra ‘O’ I can borrow?
I see what you’re doing there!
*facepalm*
K. Tom? If it’s funny once, it’s only funny once. Not a thousand times. And it was never even funny once. So fer cryin’ out loud, quit it.
What was funny once? The gesqueezels? I agree 100%, so it could be stopped if it’s not funny anymore, no?
Apparently TOM has an issue with VDA…virtual display of affection. Feeling left out??
*SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEZEEEEEEEEE*
NOOOOOOOOOOOO! I can’t stand any more of that gesqueezels!
Good Morning!
*SuzieQSqueeeeeezzzees*
i’m dying! This really hurts my head!
Good morning, GS!!!
*squeeeeeeeeeze*
You guys are like my 3 year old, if you tell him not to do something, you can be certain that that’s exactly what he’s gonna do!
Don’t throw the bottle! The he looks me in the eyes, grins, and throws the bottle!
And your point is????
You don’t like it? You can go somewhere else. No one is making you participate…whining about it doesn’t get you anywhere. Now you’re starting to sound like my 8 year old…
It’s the first time I brought it up, that’s not whining, that was just a reflexion of an adult! You’re right that I don’t like it, but it’s not bad enough to make me leave, that’s why I told yer my point of view, now what you do after that is your business Ma’am!
I believe you already know my opinion, since I’ve managed to ignore you until now. Mention it once and be done. Period.
On to bigger and better things…
It was well, thank you. Soccer games started this weekend, so needless to say, we were doing a lot of driving. I understand the tired bit, though…I was up until 12 this morning studying for my business math final tonight. Can I just say I cannot wait until I’m finished with school?
Of course you can’t say that. I can’t believe you would even need to ask that question.
Don’t get me wrong. I wanted to go back to school, but when one has a job and 4 kids to take care of, plus everything they’re involved in, it makes like a little hectic…
*swaps ‘f’ for ‘k’^*
Can you tell I’m not quite awake yet??
I know. My little brother just started kindergarten this year, so my parents have been scrambling like mad to get everything we need in time. And that’s just two kids… I can’t even imagine four.
Wow…kindergarten… The fun is just beginning…
My oldest just started 7th grade, and in a different building, so my life is getting even more interesting.
Ironically, it helps keep me sane…
That was definitely on purpose! I smell it!
You know it, sweetie! They’re all from southern Illinois – they know they can always expect something ‘different’ from us West Virginia cousins.
How did things go for you last week??
Morning Judy!
Skrat!!!
*pouncesqueeze*
I would like to see the other half of this ad
3rd
In Soviet Russia vacuum suck ass
Anny are you okay?
I don’t think that hose would be very smooth, actually.
But definitely criminal.
I’d suggest applying to your government for humour disability payments. You may use your post above as evidence of your disability. Have a nice day!
russian version of health care reform?
Noh, it’s how the russians comb the hair of their children…. See that kid’s hair is still up? that’
S why the fail….rite?
is the hose going up daddy’s trouser leg?????
Daddy’s trouser snake?
*ugh*
just trying to keep it tidy hahahahaha!
do you think that kid was trying to vacuum his room when the end of it accidentally his ass?
it must be a pedo-vacuum
apparently cat-gut can help with a torn glans, do you think that’s before or after?
*snorkle*
You men need to watch out for those Hoovers…no wonder most men avoid housework…
I swear it’s not mine.
*clickie*
*snork*
I’ve got to watch those movies again…thanks, Skrat!
I remember this happening to me. It hurt.
you screamed but no one came, sound doesn’t travel well in a vacuum
Some people just can’t come when you scream, that has nothing to do with vacuum sound travel!
how was I to know daddy was sleeping in the next room?
Oo! You nasty finger!
he rushed at me with the vacuum, I reacted on instinct
Instinct, that’s the clencher.
hahahaha!
♪ Oh yeah little angel
we want more
More, more, more, more, more. ♪
I sure hope that’s not a bagless he’s using.
wet ‘n dry
Suck’n'blow.
push ‘n’ pull
open ‘n’ shut
pen ‘n trator
Penn ‘n Teller??
kiss ‘n cuddle?
Slip ‘n slide?
slap ‘n tickle?
*shits ‘n giggles*
*points ‘n snorkles*
Tongue ‘n groove?
tongue ‘n cheek?
Sit ‘n spin?
Wash n’ wear?
twist ‘n turn
Twist ‘n shout?
Twist ‘n shout!
Refresh ‘n bukkit.
spray ‘n wash
cop ‘n ball
Hot ‘n Now
Duds ‘n suds…clickie
Pop ‘n fresh.
take ‘n bake
Shake ‘n Bake
shake, rattle, ‘n roll
give a man a hose and he thinks he’s a proctologist.
Give him a potato and make him happy for the rest of his life.
A potato a day keeps the vicar away.
aahhh… explains russian vodka, no?
I can’t tell if he’s inserting or removing. That demonstrates a real limitation of non-video fails.
* ‘Morning, everyone!*
Whoa ED! Where ya’ been?
Hey, Arthur. The posts had been getting ridiculously long. I work off-shore, so it was taking nearly 5 minutes (poor connection speed out at sea) just to load a page. I’ve been lurking a bit, though. It’s been a little trollish lately, huh? Today, I’m at one of my favorite little cafes in New Orleans, so I can chat for a while.
An oil rig? A vessel? Are you a Somalian pirate?
Yes. And yes. Er….my pirate lawyer has advised me not to answer the last question.
Lawyers in those countries do really well for themselves!
who gets the potato out?
hoo hoo hoover
who gets the potato out?
hoo hoo hoover
…….new ad campaign
Ha ha ha!
Hire Spuds Mackenzie as the mascot.
Some people just can’t stand a spot of dirt.
the dry bidet will put the toilet paper industry to ruin
*announcer voice*
Hey kids? Are you tired of wiping your tush? Think it’s icky, boring, or simply too difficult? Then listen up, because boy oh boy, have I got just the thing for you!
does it come with different attachments for the corn…ers?
fun at the time, but the poo smell never left and the carpets had to be replaced
Winnie is a smelly old bear?
he got the hunny all over his paws
That’s what happens when you hang around with a little Piglet.
He is drilling bio-fuel for his new methane powered Volvo S80.
It’s the wave of the future!
hahahahaha!
minor got mined
The dad is staking his claim.
♪
Sometimes I feel I’ve got to
Run away I’ve got to
Get away
From the pain that you drive into the heart of me
The love we share
Seems to go nowhere
And I’ve lost my light
For I toss and turn I can’t sleep at night
Once I ran to you (I ran)
Now I’ll run from you
This tainted love you’ve given
I give you all a boy could give you
Take my tears and that’s not nearly all
Oh…tainted love
Tainted love ♫
*puts in anti ear-worm earplugs*
Not today, my boy…too much to do at work…
You are pure evil…
Well, hey, if I have to have a song stuck in my head, I’d rather it be this one. I love this song
Oh no, a picture of a vacuum hose between the kids legs – it must be pedophilia! Yes, let’s crop the picture so it looks like the hose is up the kids butt, nevermind at that angle it would be impossible.
Idiots.
Duly noted.
how do you know so much about angles and inserting things in kid’s butts?
i would have to say that this was INTENTIONALLY DONE!
nah! he was just trying to clean his room
With a crevice tool?
“He likes it! Hey Mikey!”
…sorry… couldn’t help myself, I feel almost ashamed.
Don’t be ashamed of it, that’s life.
Nothing to be ashamed of, so long as you don’t make a cereal habit of it.
*chex to be sure*
*Gets his kix*
What are you doing?
Nut ‘n Honey
*Tries some trix*
*does some (froot) loops*
*Head goes kaboom*
*gets the ShamWow*
Thanks for checking SuzieQ, you’re my lucky charm
s!Not a problem. Just making sure you’re not a fruity pebble…
I checked that Photobomb site of yours, really good stuff on there, a pity there’s no comment threads!
You know… Eastern Europe has different customs… speaking of enemas…
they stopped enemas, that was 40 years ago!
You got those too in the States, just that you call ‘em colonics!
I nearly forgot! The Cheezstock thing that’s going to be happening today over at ICHC is today. It’s in just over a half an hour (9:00 a.m., Pacific time; it’s 8:24 a.m. right now, so you can do the math
).
ht tp://failblog.org/2009/08/27/garage-parking-fail/#comment-583513
Redundancy fail. But you get the point.
It’s in ten minutes, folks! Be ready to switch over to teh land uv teh kittehs! (lolspeak is thankfully optional though, so don’t trouble yourself if you don’t want to
Thanks, Shadow! I was just coming by with a reminder.
*twirls to show off her groovy white fringe-y Grace Slick outfit*
*runs back to ICHC for her soundcheck*
Yup. Good luck!
Wait a minute, where are my keys????
Don’t worry about your keys. I’m sure you’ll sing just fine.
Some pretty messed up everyday technology
getting rid of all the access junk???
this picture is wrong on so many levels, lol
Potty Training Win!
*snork*
I always loose the kid attachment to my vacuum, I wonder if you can buy them separately?
Anal probing win
Why are all my comments on ICHC being moderated?
Most ICHC posts get moderated if you have never posted there before. Keeps the trolls away from teh kittehs.
Right now moderation is keeping the kittehs away from the kittehs. Hmph. But the music is seeping through.
So what do I have to do to not have them moderated? Log in to my ICHC account before I post?
You’ll probably just have to wait for a while before your comments appear. If you never commented over there before they just need to inspect, detect and neglect you until they are satisfied that you are harmless. After that you should have your comments show up in real time.
Don’t worry; Cheezstock might go on all afternoon.
Ah well… Okay.
P.S. LCB, when my comments do get out of moderation, you’re going to see that I asked you why they’re all being moderated. Ignore that question
I totally forgot about that possibility, BTW, otherwise when I invited you guys last week I would have advised you to make an initial comment then so you would be out of customs in time for the day.
*hangs head, walks away dejectedly*
*trips over fringes*
Oh, and I’m just doing my song now that mentions you guys!
again yer all lemurshit crazy
According to whom?
I hear that’s how homosexuals get rid of aids
lol…….. Russian people can joke too, or make a fail! ))))) lol
Good Morning all! Hope everyone had a good weekend!
*Squeeze!*
If you eat too much cheese, this is what you have to do some times.
Could just eat more fiber, but hey… whatever floats yer boat.
..a va-cum?
If you fools knew how to read Russian, you would know that this is an ad for a colonoscopy kid for pediatricians. Nothing to laugh about.
err… colonoscopy kit*…. trolling fail I suppose.
hahahahahahahahah xDDDDDDD
This is a FAIL Blog fail. Why? Because you let some lame fails onto this site…come on someone has cropped this pic to be a fail, I am sure the original has the has the hose appearing between the kids knees connecting with the floor. No hoses lost in bottoms.
Seriously a fail is only a fail when no one had to tamper with it…
…and without even the common courtesy of a reach around!
the first vacuum cleaner ad that just SUCKS…. literally…
i think the dad is trying to tell us that the boys ass is veeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrry dirty and tissue can’t clean it so they use a vacume
what’s the big deal? kid seems to like it. doesn’t seem like it’s his first experience with automated felching aides.
The county court Boosechoose will be informed and may pursue you. They are a cross between a police officer and a bailiff. In fact they have more powers than both, they are able to force their way into property and are permitted to carry a concealed firearm. They are often ex army personel and can be very aggressive.
Let suck children’s crap. *Puts the vacuum cleaner on other’s asses* THAT INCLUDES YOU, GENERAL!!!
This picture rules! Check your sense of humor if you think otherwise.
did he die?
Sucks those turds right out! Plus, he likes it because it reminds him of when you pull out.
That kid is possing for the picture.. I mean.. hi´s not really in the ad, right?
In Soviet Russia, vacuum hoses you!
Don’t give me none of your crap, son!
you guys are so immature.
how else is he supposed to clean his son’s rectum….sheesh.
anal party
hey, that sucks!
Literally, heh heh heh. Yeah, okay.
FROM RUSSIA WITH LOVE!!!!111oneone
Marketing gone wrong!
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