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Don’t go there.
Hi Aja! *hugs* You came first. he
Do you want a tissue?
ShamWow, rather.
No-one ever cleans it, I thought a tissue would be a little more hygenic for all parties involved!
This is not the place to be if hygiene is an issue for you.
Swine Flu can affect us all
*sneezes*
hm … a tissue reissue issue
dont worry. I play them all the time to rank up the deficit
Ahhh Ahhhh AHhhh, SWINE FLU!
*How do I look in my new firefox outfit?*
Gesund-Feuer-Fuchs-heit!
I think whoever wrote the cover of this box of matches was just “playing” around.
dude?! astma guy here? I don’t wanna mutate or anything =(
Astma? Sounds like a wheeze! Is that anything like asthma?
*Wrings out Shamwow and throws it in washing machine*
You better wash your hands with bleach now… Wringing out the ShamWow with bare hands.. seriously…
I eat germs for breakfast!
wheat germs?
This one’s bugging me too.
Let’s go back, Terry. A muffin or a doughnut might be safer.
Oh yes, a muffin sounds good. You’re a good spore’t.
I think SNtJ knows a shortcut back to the bakery. If we take the path o’ Jen we’ll get there sooner.
So long as she’s not using them new-fangled jen-etically modified wheat germs.
That would be very disin-jen-uous of her.
Researchers are now realizing that the reason some people have difficulty losing weight is because they have MORE EFFICIENT bacteria in their digestive system — bacteria that break down the food effectively make more nutrients available for absorption into the body.
So, some of the germs we eat for breakfast help us eat our breakfast.
There are, by the way, 10 times as many bacterial cells in the human body as there are human cells.
ol’ copypasta trolls are ol’
*hugs* Now give me those matches. I need to light up.
I didn’t realise you guys had a spark.
*squeeze
Well it’s not necessarily romance, playas might just be working on their game.
go playas!
In Spanish a playa is a beach
In gangsta a playa has a biyatch.
…in traffic.
You like to throw firecrackers at passing vehicles?
You don’t??? It’s a hoot!
All these years I have been doing it wrong. I was just throwing matches at the vehicles.
*pouts*
*Just* firecrackers?
We Don’t need no water…
Let the M.F. burn!
Someone’s dark sarcasm needs some education.
Hey!
Teacher!
Leave them kids alone!
These are safe green matches…nothing can possibly go wrong?
The designers are either infallible or inflammable…can’t decide
No no. Theese are enviromental friendly matches. You know… go green, burn stuff. Forest fire is eco-friendly that way.
In-fail-able
I believe they’re either flammable or inflammable.
Inflammable means the same thing as flammable.
lol … and you expect me to believe this
Irregardless, it’s true.
In regards to this mess, are you sure???
It’s either doubtless or indubitable.
Sounds like fun
Didn’t your mother ever tell you to play with fire in moderation?
It’s Okay if One at the time
Don’t burn more than one building a day.
What about bridges?
I’ve always been told don’t burn them behind you, but burning them in front of you seems even dumber.
I came across this yesterday, I like it (attributed to a Scottish classical guitarist named David Russell):
“The only bad thing about burning your bridges behind you is that the world is round.”
Guitarist? I thought only Jimi Hendrix burned those bridges.
Jimi’s vision was a bit hazy. He could hardly see the bridges to start with.
And yet, you never heard him fret about it.
That’s right, All along the watchtower
Princes kept the view for him
(in their purple, um, reign)
Oops, just checked it — that quote actually is attributed to “unknown.”
David Russell said something similar: “The hardest thing in life is to know which bridge to cross and which to burn.”
And the KKK’s David Duke, of course, said, “Let’s burn a cross.”
…And Levi Stubbs of the Four Tops said (just after the greatest musical pause in the rock repertoire)…
“Bernadette!!! “
awesome … clickie for MRN’s reference, around the 2:40 mark.
Go play with fermata’s!
Wow, not much of a visual, is it? Still great to hear that song again – so much pain and anguish over a woman conveyed in that vocal.
So it’s okay to play with matches, as long as it is in moderation?
Where’s Moderation? Sounds hot there!
Yes, there’s an !m@ge on the matchbox cover, so it’s in moderation.
Is this an ‘in moderation’ comment?
The guy on the left is rushing in with a bottle of water, just in case.
That looks like a drink he got from the bar. So he’s playing with fire and he’s drunk.
Maybe they’re trying to make a Flaming Moe.
Serves him right, always selling Duff beer.
Simpson simpletons rush in where accelerants fire do spread.
Did he die?
did i die?
i died and lived at the same time
No mentio of the 3rd state……
Alive, dead or Bloody livid ’cause some idiot shoved you in a box.
I didn’t think of that.
Well known scientific rewording of schrodingers work…by anyone who has ever owned a cat.
Neat.
I honestly don’t know sorry.
Play better, play in moderation… lolwut?
You smoke, you play.
:[
We’re serious.
The most boring game of roulette ever.
I’ll bet that the judge would have accepted these in defense if Sergio Martinez had presented them in his defense. (The actual defense should have been a failure, but the we had a judicial failure.)
?!
I’d rather play with my Hot Wheels, in moderation of course.
JAM!!! THAT’S NOT THE SORT OF THING YOU SAY IN PU-
Oh, the toy cars. I thought you meant – never mind.
I wanna play with your hot wheels:D
Try matchbox.com, sniff.
Good plan. They have a new line of cheap pick-ups.
This is a Win… haha
That’s what I thought. Matches are for playing right?
sicamore!
[sic]
[thus] quoth the raven
You’re a whore squawk
That’s a more sick call, girl.
At least I do not pay the rent, boy!
heh, that makes me gigglo –
at least I don’t harr-harr, alot!
Is that not against the prostitution…..
Thus quoth the caw, girl — Nevada mores.
Let’s order in the courtesan.
i’m bordelloed
She is but a girl, a working girl *sigh*
*grits teeth and hopes that 80′s haired Sigorney weaver does not turn up*
Are you the Keymaster?
The little dude doesn’t realise he is running to his immenent firey death.
STOP RUNNING LITTLE MAN. STOP!
The guy at the desk is doing nothing.
He is staring at something in his hands.
I wonder what it is.
Does anyone know what it could be?
I think that’s a bar, and the guy’s the bartender. He’s shaking a martini shaker.
*shakes*
I would like a martini please.
Hey, why is that guy running? *sits there and looks*
This isn’t a fail…not even close…
This isn’t a funny comment…not even close…
♫ You scotch my nerves and you rattle my brain
Too much drink drives a man insane
You broke my will, oh what a thrill
Goodness gracious, great balls of fire ♫
Don’t lose your Heads Talking that way, Jerry Lee —
you could Byrne Down the House.
.
(Don’t want to hurt nobody)
But I was trying to show everyone one how to burn a house down. Is there anything wrong with that?
sounds like just an ordinary guy thing
Come on its educational and fun at the same time.
We didn’t start the Fire
Come on baby Light my Fire
Fight Fire With Fire
give the boy a bottle of whisky and he got his own molotov!
I won’t hurt anyone or anything.
Trust me.
You do believe me…right?
Play with fiyah.
♪ You say your mom ain’t home, it ain’t my concern,
Just a-play with me and you won’t get burned,
I have only one itchin’ desire –
Let me stand next to your fiyah! ♪
I agree its perfectly danger….I mean safe.
♪ We didn’t start the fiyah!
Yeah, yeah. I suppose it was always burning since the world’s been turning?
maybe these are Chinese matches, to go along with their other toy themes such as lead painted toys
Yay!
I didn’t know there were more harmful toys.
Anything can kill if you have enough ingenuity and patience!
Yay! I’ll start on it right now. *days later* I finally made one. It is sharp glass dodge ball. I call it the “dodge ball extreme”, kids are going to love it.
So, do you think it would work?
too obvious, subtle wins the war!
Yep.
How about: “Dodge ball extreme; Carcin-edition!” (the secret ingredient is asbestos!)
I like the sound of that.
Hosted by Carcin Daily!
How about air?
Finally, the perfect gift for the child you hate.
No! I don’t take directions from matchboxes!
*sits here having no fun*
She says baby
It’s 3 am I must be lonely ♪
gonna get cold Hans
the perfect present for the Kid who has no magnifying glass
Oh, fireworks safety videos. You will never let us down with your futility.
Play in moderation eh? So you’re only allowed to burn down the garage and not the house?
Burnin down the House!
Oh c’mon! This is a Failblog fail! It’s a good matchbox… (’cause it brings more fails…
)))
Matchbox WIN!!!
Kids, don’t play with fire.
*rubs matches and flamed FailBLog*
Bob Saget, FailBlog got burned!!!
that’s what i was thinking
Thank you for sharing information,Indeed it will increase the exposure to the users. Great work
sales of this must be red hot
haha @ the running man xD
Ballantine’s wants to torch some clubs & bars… using its own drinkers.
noooo epic win
I think this matchbox may be referencing a drinking game:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matchbox_(drinking_game)
“Here kid, go play with these. Fire is FUN! The cover even says so.” I could barely stop laughing, thinking about the implications…
wow, who made this matchbox?
Definitely a win =p
Total Matchbox Fail.
(Don’t Play With Fire, as we always say.)