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Cheezburger Network Blog
First!
Thanks for the contribution. You are making this community so much better. Thank you sir.
youre welcome
Your you’re are both acceptable. Youre is not a word though. Got to watch those red squiggles.
Though ‘your’ wouldn’t be grammatically accepted in such a sentence. And by the way.. WATCH OUT FOR THE SQUIRRELS!!!
I missed a comma… Your, you’re are both acceptable***
apostrophe, not comma. geez
Um, no. It was a comma in this specific case.
The point is … “Your Welcome” is not acceptable
“You are” or “You’re”
“Your” indicates possession
What’s wrong with his welcome? I think the welcome he possesses is perfectly acceptable. How do you feel about my welcome?
Ah, dude, you’ve got the best welcome ever. Just, like, dude. Ahhh! Just zzzaaaa-baaaaahhh!
To use welcome in a possessive sense might be colloquially correct (if you’re going to say “we gave him a welcome”, for example) however it still isn’t a sentence. maybe “It’s your welcome.”… Though now, even if it works as a sentence, there isnt any sense to be made in the context. I think you’d be better off with an apostrophe
*squeeze*
no no no, it is “ah, dude ‘youv’ got the best welcome ever”
dear oh dear, the spelling and grammar here is terrible.
…but the “First” was nice. Good time to use it IMHO…
::ticker tape parade for foreign dignitary::
::VIP meets with foreign dignitary::
VIP: How did you like your welcome?
For Dig: It was very nice.
Ya’ll need to speak better American.
duuuude
Thanks Avis.
thread fail
Comment WIN!
Response to comment response fail?
LMAO
*Taps chest twice with a closed fist followed by the sideways peace sign* Grammar Nazi’s unite!
I must say, this guy loses points for being a raving idiot. However, having the confidence to give interview responses like that on camera should definitely be a win. Come to think of it, the fail should be with the people who chose the person to interview and then subsequently did the editing of the recordings. If that was the best of the footage, they should have scrapped the entire interview.
Grammar Nazi’s what? Or Was that meant to be the plural of “nazi”? If so, you’ll want to remove that pesky apostrophe.
I love when threads turn into grammar tirades! go to spogg.org to join the fight!
puLEEEZEE! let’s concentrate on content not grammar! Even us/we dyslexics have something to say! and besides, it’s CALI duuuuuude and he’s HAPPY! don’t harsh our mellow maaaan!
Well don’t I look like a right wank now… Yes, behead that pesky apostrophe! How dare it infiltrate my sentence! *Hmpf!*
in german its simply Nazis =)
Touche!
I guarantee you that this guy was joking and just playing up the stereotype. GUARANTEED. This is a win for the surfer, and a humor fail for everyone who can’t see that he is owning the interviewer.
On the other hand it might by a PSA for not doing drugs and driving a surfboard, or even trying to talk.
-500 points.
1) What is with the newest wave of idiocy in confusing the apostrophe and the comma?
2) Or perhaps this was a “joke.” Let me know if it is so I can hunt you down and burn everyone you know.
3) Random asterisk trios. Why? If there is a reason, a plague on a 30-mile radius from you.
The three asterisks are commonly used to signify a correction to a previous remark, especially when instant messaging or the like. Just in case you really wanted to know.
Your welcome could be grammatically correct in some circumstances… for instance, if someone asked you which of your mats to put out, your ‘welcome mat’ or your ‘Get off My Lawn’ mat it would be perfectly acceptable to answer, ‘your welcome’.
Does your mom put out (her welcome mat)?
Don’t overstay your welcome.
answers.com
hey assholes, comment about the video
But ‘your’ is not grammatically accepted in such a sentence. By the way… WATCH OUT FOR THE SQUIRRELS!
Okay, my comment was duplicated…?
Oh noes! I wrote it twice! Bad me! Bad!
This seems a bit Fishy..
And avatar changed… Did he/she change computer?
Just a fishy guy/gal up to some fishy things…
I wouldn’t be surprised if he/she did
Holy mackerel! you don’t say?
“Your welcome” – no. Not acceptable. Just… no. Learn English, please!
… I was talking about the words themselves. Read and comprehend first. I missed a comma saying that those were both acceptable words. Whereas youre is not a word.
No, only you’re is acceptable. If you say “your welcome”, you are talking about their welcome.
ROFL I THINK HE HIGH
High people don’t really act like that, unless they don’t smoke often, and even then…. that would be an over-exaggeration.
My thoughts exactly. Who ever said weed is harmless should have a chat with surfer boy over here.
@jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjYeah dude like totally your first WOW congrats duuuude.Whoa you’re awesome like these killer waves bra!
Wow this makes Southern California people very smart. Last time I was in the area people I met seemed smarter than this surfer. All I can say is wow.
Surfs up!
I’m down with that.
Dont you mean “Im down with that”?
DUDE! I mean, DUDE!
“… I mean, you just ride the barrel… and then you get pitied, so pitied.”
Yes. I definately pity him.
You need more than an ocean-side setting for good locution, locution, locution.
I’ll circumlocute you.
oh, what a delicious dialectic, dilettante –
I’ll be sure to come up and down with some reciprocally cunning and round-about lingo for you.
___
“Whatever is in the heart will come up to the tongue”
~ Persian proverb
You are just proving your stripes as some sort of linguist. If only I could put my finger on what type.
Using your finger may be unnecessary…
Its just that, just like on that movie, that wachayacallit, well anyways, just safe journey. Just that you are alive tomorrow, like.
It appears some feel using their brain unnecessary.
Nice word, dilettante. I didn’t know what it meant, so I looked it up. I love this word. I know people who are like this. I never knew a word for it. Thanks! I love expanding my Vocab anyday
I, for one, pity the fool.
This punrun went in a crap direction.
I see your point.
What is the point? Is it the route of all evil?
NO WAY!
YES WAVE!
NEW WAVE?
WHOOOOAA!
WAAHOOOO!
Anywaves it’s still rock & roll to me.
*Shoots self*
well-played … just please don’t start any fires
Ho ho, don’t make me take you with me big shot!
Sorry. *squeeze*
Things are every which way but loose today.
Hey, Brewski, you have a loose thread on your pants. Here, let me help you with it.
*pulls thread, unravelling Brewski’s pants until they become short shorts*
Oops! Sorry.
Oh man!!! Why did you have to wait so late in the day? I am going to miss all the action now.
*squeeze Lurk*
*squeeze Leila*
I blame work.
Bastards!! Do they think you’re there to do some actual work? The nerve!!!!!
*feels something is very wrong here, but somehow strangely familiar*
*feels urge to make fluffy a tasty sandwich*
What? Work? Damn. Gotta do some myself. Curses! Why do stores always insist on getting money in exchange for things??
*hands Brewski a big pile of thread*
Here. Maybe they’ll give you money in exchange for what’s left of your pants. By the way, that’s a good look for you.
*plotting a way to get Brewski hypnotized again*
I think you left the rest of us behind with that turn.
We don’t have to be so crestfallen. We can hang here or catch the next pun-run.
This we can start a descent one?
“Think”, not “This”…
*dips head in bukkit*
I think you’re falling down on the job there, Fluffy!
But remember, no matter how deep bukkit it is, you allways can get up!
Don’t hang your head, it happens to the best of us.
Product of American Education
XD
he´s awesome lolol
Wave of (language) mutilation.
He probably drove his car into the ocean a long time ago.
♪ You take your car to work ♪
♪ I’ll take my board ♪
♪ And when you’re out of fuel ♪
♪ I’m still afloat ♪
Thanks. Now I have that song in my mind for the rest of the evening.
Would you prefer me to destroy your sweater?
Are you sure your name isn’t Jonas?
Ooh! Can I carry the will?
*pulls string*
*walks away*
Ahha — that’s why he talks that way — he is a talking surfer doll!!!
This would be the song we’re referring to. Clickie.
OK — FINE!!! Keep the thread on topic …. *stomps off*
I’m sorry Elsa. I didn’t mean to unravel your work there.
I can’t believe she weft like that.
Cricked copyrights! Can’t wach here!
LOL
A few barrels don’t make a speakeasy.
*Looks for an axiom*
A few comic marvels don’t make a surfer silver-tongued.
phenomenal! 9 out of 10 lols!
What’s wrong with the tenth dentist, anyway?
a dam broke, and then he was all like,
“WHOOSH BRAAAA … a few waves of effluent sure don’t make a fluency.”
“Dude, you get like the best bridges ever, and like, you just like pull out the scaler and you get like spit right out of them like BOOOOOOOOSH”
A mouth filled with sliver-surfaced fillings yesterday, does not make a surfer talk purdy today.
~David Sedentist
A fine figure on the beach doesn’t make for fine figures of speech~.
Say what, now?
Exactly.
You know, you’re really cute, but I don’t know what you’re saying! Say the first thing again!
Some people really should be shudding-up more.
No really, WHAT was he saying?!! WTF is “pitted”?
Can you tell I live in the midwest?
I could probably translate for you as I grew up there and speak fluent surfer, but I have no sound on my work computer. Whatevs.
Awesome use of the language, dude.
Most excellent.
Is starfish all, like, “PWAAAH!!!!”…and then, like, “BOOOOOSH!!”??
Totes.
*ponders* I wonder what surfer speak would sound like in LOLSpeak???
OH….Elsa_Mama…!!! You just gave me a fit of the giggles!
“Its jist liek u get teh bestest berrolz evr deud.”
Yea. I’m actually a little stupider now. It’s funny how you can feel it.
Open the tubular bay doors, HAL.
Dude, your space helmet would go like BOOOOOOOsH
Dude, this conversation like, can serve no purpose like, Whoosh!!!
Daisy, daisy.
Give me your answer dude.
Dammit, AJA 9000! I was working on the same tubular tune. I’m gonna post it ANYWAVES:
~~~
DUDE, DUDE, give me your answer, dude. I’m half crazy, dude, all for the love of, like, WOOOSH. It won’t be a stylish stylin’, cuz I can’t afford like a, um, dictionary. But you’ll look totally sweet upon the sweet seat of a sweet board for … like it’s all TOO SWEET …
I guess I just wasn’t tout suite enough
Dave so pitted that stargate!
My god, it’s full of WHPAAAAAHHHH
Dude, like, I’m afraid. I’m afraid, Dude. Duuuude. my mind is going Whoosh! I can feel it. I can feel it, like Whaaaa!
*right now I’m picturing one of those hominids from the first part of the movie …. and that … dum … Dum … DUM … DADUMM!!!!! 2001 theme music blasting in the background … as he goes totally tubular on a surfboard*
the name of that song, btw, is Also Sprach Zarathustra, by Richard Strauss … which I now fear I’ll always think of as “THUS SPAKE THE SURFER-DUDESTER”
*Snort*
Thank you for watching our presentation of:
Dude It’s like 2009: A Surfer Oddity
Actually, some of the stuff he was saying didn’t even make sense if you’re a surfer – he was speaking in some form of onomotopoeia…
I understood everything until the “pitted part,” but he basically said that the waves were breaking and making barrels and that it a surfer could either get in the barrel and exitreallyfast to the side, which is fun, or come from the top of the wave and surf the part in front of the barrel as the wave is just breaking. Not much else to note there, really.
I got the barrel part, I really don’t get much else about what he said.
The pit of a wave is the hallowest part. Your assumption is correct, being “pitted” is basically being in the barrel.
Learning to surf on the East Coast means you really have no clue what it’s like to be in a barrel.
That term doesn’t exist over here! Thanks for the translation.
Anytime nectar momma.
hallowed by thy wave
_()_
♪Glory be the waves by the shore!♪
talk to me after you’ve surfed buxton, frisco pier, or the lighthouse at hatty during a large swell (hurricane, nor-easter or otherwise).
we spend some time in the green room i can tell you that much
That dude spoke Wandarin.
I’m impressed, Bearly! I didn’t know you spoke surfer!
Bearly learned to surf in her teen years, but found that she got sunburned too easily and thinks it’s really too much work. So she now just bodysurfs and her brother has taken custody of her beautiful, 7′4″ funboard.
At least you have water. I hate being landlocked.
It’s true that the ocean does wonders for my mood when I’m upset, but then again, the tourists have the exact opposite effect. Seasons other than summer swing the balance in favor of the ocean, though.
I used to go every week when I lived in Bundaberg. I love the beach, which is weird because I have a phobia of natural bodies of water.
You’ll have to elaborate on that one! Does swimming in them bother you? Are you afraid of the things that live in them?
Yes! You can’t see anything in there. It’s so creepy. Especially when there’s seaweed and gross stuff. If anything brushes my leg, I’m out of of the water instantly.
I can only think of 2 special cases : the ocean, and some of the lakes on Fraser Island.
*Cancels plans to book hammykins a trip to Loch Ness for Christmas*
I know what you mean, actually. When I was younger I used to swim in lakes all the time, but after I got used to the ocean, it’s hard to override the “ick” feeling of touching the goo on the bottom of the lake. For some reason, though, I have no fear of sharks whatsoever. This is probably stupid of me.
Ooh. I’ve been to Loch Ness. It’s one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever seen.
(The giant plastic Nessie put up for the tourists notwithstanding.)
Teehee. I have a shirt I got there that says “I’m a wee monster” on it.
X-D
The fates apparently decided the form of my new avatar to coincide with this fail (assuming, of course, that the avatar actually appears somewhat on schedule).
OooOOoooh! Pretty!
Hee….!
Love it!
I agree!
♪ Little darling, little one
make my heart come all undone
Do you love me, do you, Sufer Girl? ♫
Awww! Heehee!
It doesn’t show so well in the tiny size — but Hello Kitty is tan (which you likely figured out), holding a surfboard (also pretty obvious) — and wearing a little rainbow-colored bikini (that’s the not-so-clear part).
I wish I looked like that in bikini.
*giggles*
Erm…if you did, I might suggest a wax. Just sayin’.
No clue. Sorry.
Same here. We don’t get many big waves on the Ohio River!
*squeezes Avis*
*squeeze back* Lake Michigan can get some whitecaps, but that’s about it.
Oooh! Oooh! You can float on the Great Salt Lake! The salt content makes the water dense enough to float on it! But, the lake stinks, and who wants to swim in salt anyway. Yuck.
Hey, the best we have around here is a farm pond. No complaining.
I can pretty much float in any water (seriously, I was at a pool and three people asked me how I did it, I didn’t have an answer), but I don’t step foot in Lake Michigan. It stinks.
Avis, I was thinking about shellacking the purse from this morning’s fail so you can thwack trolls with it.
Does a purse need shellacking? Just toss a brick or two into it.
Did you see the purse? Some had a fishy pun run going so I assumed it would need to be shellacked…
…but brick is fine too.
I saw the purse, it’s amazing what designers will foist (or try to) on us. Weren’t there a pair of jeans that would have gone perfectly with that purse a few months ago?
I remember the jeans in the 80’s that had clear plastic windows over the butt cheeks.
*hands Avis a box of horse shoes*
These will do even better.
*adds horse shoes to the bricks already in the purse*
I’m hedging my bets.
Not if you go to a beach away from Chicago. I prefer the beaches in Michigan — they are excellent and not all that far away.
*Used to live in New Buffalo*
*Loves the Michigan side beaches*
*Also loves tumbling down the Indiana Dunes*
I figured that the beaches way from here would be nicer. They’d HAVE to be! What baffles me is that Oak Street Beach, the trendiest beach in the city (listed as the eleventh sexiest beach in the country) is also one of the stinkiest.
I have lived in the Chicago area for oh … 40 years. I have never been to the beach in Chicago. Can get to a lovely Michigan beach in 2 hours (depending on the traffic in Indiana) *shakes fist at Indiana*
I live closest to Oak Street Beach, so if I go, that’s usually the one. North Ave. Beach has that awful “boat house” with the bar on the top deck. The music in addition to being extremely loud, is just awful. Oak Street Beach is at least usually quieter. Just don’t go alone.
*shakes fist at Indiana too*
*rolls up window and hopes his car doesn’t break down*
ever so true!! I went there on vacation once. we collected pebbles, but refused to swim
And then she was like Bam! Bam! Whoooosh like whoa
They’re a modern stoner family –
they always have a yabba dabba WHOOPAAHHH time.
Did I know that you live in Ohio Judy?
Not sure, Jimbo, but you do now.
Well, it’s nice to know I have a fellow southern Ohio failer. You understand when I whine about the weather….
Eastern Ohio here. Across the river from Wheeling WV. And our weather’s fine!
You’re pretty close to where Pretty Boy Floyd was gunned down then.
*hides machine gun behind back*
Yeah, and what’s your point?
Oh, nothing. I live right in the area John Dillinger was most active in. Ohio history is really interesting if you get into it.
*pulls out tommy gun*
Stick ‘em up!
That was a joke. I guess you can’t hear a gangster accent on the internet.
Yeah, I looked that up. East Liverpool isn’t too far from here.
And I live not too far (about two miles) from where Dillinger was shot.
Is the Biograph still there Avis?
It is, and they rehabbed it too.
Ah, Ohioans. Hello Ohioans, I hail from the Flint Ridge area myself. It’s been a brilliant day today, but I am stuck inside.
That’s on the east side of Columbus right?
A ways east of Columbus. Closer to Zanesville. It’s where the hills start.
Well, it’s always nice to have Ohioans on here. I seem a little more sane when I start spouting about how much I hate Michigan. I’m from the Cincy-Dayton area myself. It’s nice to meet you dandy.
Likewise.
Hey, I know Zanesville, ragidandy. I’m in Dillonvale — south of Steubenville.
Huh! I tried to ride my bike there once. I didn’t make it; I forgot to take food. It was a bad experience. But I’m sure it would have been better if I had made it.
(I hear people that’s where people in Ohio get hi.)
I hear the same.
ack, over-run with Ohioians!!!! aaaaaaahhhh, lol, when we took or family road trip around the great lakes, we went through Ohio. Verry nice people! PA says, hiya neighbor!
Howdy.
I always thought it meant profuse sweating under the arms. But I think not in this context. He was referring to riding inside the barrel of a wave. Maybe that’s what “pitted” is about?
*hands Brewski a new Right Guard stik*
Pits of the world.
Double pits to chesty?
That line always makes me twitch, but whatever ad agency came up with it clearly came up with something catchy. I’ll never buy their product – but I remember their tag line!
It’s sooooooooo stoooooooooooopid…
*tries to etch-a-sketch-erase tag line*
*utterly fails*
Good day, Dragon and nightshayde! *squeezies*
New avatar, ns? Pretty! And quite appropriate for this fail!
Howdy, our most Judylicious Judy!
*squeezies back*
Hi, Judy! *squeeze*
The odd thing is that I picked the new avatar & uploaded it before I even saw this fail (which I still technically haven’t seen since it’s blocked at work).
*squeeze* for DW, too
OMG, he is like, I mean he is so cool and articulate and descriptive – yea good descriptives and stuff. Gosh og golly he is like so cute and smartikal – yea he’s so smart, I mean like for someone who has been repeatedly hit on head with a surf board…..
Ooooohhh, Gnarly, you are so, like, woaaaahhh, like tubular!! Totally!
The part where he was like, Wahhhhh, I was so geeeerrrrrrr, and then when he was like maaaaooooo, it was so like aaaawwwww!
That’s what he said? I thought he had a petite mal seizure….
ROFL
You were like “Woah!” then we were like “WOAH!” Then you were all “wooahh….”
I wonder if he knows kung-fu now.
Dude! It was all like, I mean Dude! And then it was totally, like, Dude!
This vid reminded me of “Airplane!”
“Oh stewardess! I speak jive!”
Golly!
Smartikal?
The other TV stations don’t surfer fools gladly.
You must look beneath the surface to find the pearl AA.
Is this a straw man argument?
*surfaces*
*POUNCITY!!!!*
*is buoyed*
*rings out*
Yea — Avis baby — smartikal — its like what all the cool girls say about the cute cool boys — don’t you watch Disney Channel???
Some of us try in vain NOT to…alas, the Q crew has 2 female pre-teen Disney fans…
*sighs*
Oh, I’m sorry… *squeeze*
Thank you…you have no *sniff* idea how hard it is to hear Hannah Montana ALL the TIME…
*squeeze back*
Yikes! You poor thing, I hope FB can be a Hannah haven for you. Welcome
A refuge in the face of pre-teen hormones…very much so!
Thank you…
*blows kisses to FB friends*
We’re a Hannah and a Jonas Bros-free zone!
oh, thank god!
Actually, I do. Honestly, I do. Sometimes it makes me want to do horrible things to myself, but then I realize my condition …
Ouch…my 6 yr old is into Phineas and Ferb and “the Bob, Sponge that is”. P and F are really pretty good.
Spongebob gets a LOT of air time at our house. iCarly is another one of the child’s favorites (Nikelodeon rather than Disney). I can live with both shows. She used to watch Drake and Josh — that would send me scurrying from the room.
Not unless I’m at gunpoint.
My 26-year-old sister still watches the Disney Channel.
*sigh*
Death before dishonor Avis! Stand strong!
*Straightens shoulders, holds head high*
*starts to giggle*
Disney movies, on occasion (at the theatre). Disney channel? Not a chance.
Actually, I’m down with some old Disney cartoons too. Tailspin anyone?
*puts VHS tape in VCR*
Excellent! My fiance just downloaded and burned a whole pile of Disney movies for me. So much fun!
*pops in Rescue Rangers tape*
I could go all day.
I love “Rescue Rangers”. Although when I think “Rescue”, I think “The Rescuers Down Under”.
Rescue Rangers was my favorite regular series when I was a kid. Anything with Wil E. Coyote will always be my favorite, but they weren’t on regularly.
coyote got his wooden keyboard with a real mouse tied to it with twine from Acme.
(leaving this here for ya laters, Amish one…)
Ahem. Carry on.
too bad that is not what is on the Disney Channel — can you say Teen Queens and Boy … well I guess I do not know what to call the boys …
??? hmmmmm…..
I wish someone would show Looney Tunes too. It’s so sad that the old cartoons aren’t shown anymore.
PC cops think they’re too violent and un-PC. I watched them and I turned out just fine…I think…
I KNOW! I especially liked them from the Speedy Gonzalez/ Pepe Le Pew era, although looking back I realize that those cartoons were terribly racist.
My mom had a video with 6 hours of those old cartoons. My kids would watch it all at once …
I have all the Looney Tunes collections on DVD. My son loves to pop them in!
Heck, I love to pop them in, and no kiddies around here.
We have Animaniacs DVDs. The Animaniacs cartoons are brilliant – but “Buttons and Mindy” just needs to go. *twitch*
“The Great Wakkorotti” once made me laugh so hard the day after I got home from having abdominal surgery that I busted three stitches and I had to go back to the hospital to get them fixed.
Pinky and The Brain were just awesome. Beyond awesome actually.
Ha!! I think I could manage that after downing an entire bottle of champagne.
I blame the really good, really strong drugs they had me on.
I looooove Wakko! I think my fav is when he has to go to the bathroom, but he can’t go potty in there, it’s disgusting!
*snerk*
I just heard that in Wakko’s accent in my head.
*decides to listen to the Animaniacs music today whilst working*
*snorkity*
I’m sooooo glad you heard it the way I said it!
*squeeze*
You know Pinky and the Brain was awesome, too!
Clickie!
Sneaky little Brain. Trying to teach me things!
I love you Bearly….
They all played on stereotypes. Elmer Fudd, anyone think he might have been a redneck? Who cares though, they were funny. Sometimes just laughing is the best way to deal with things.
OT – my boyfriend is a trainmaster. My ringtone when he calls is Elmer Fudd singing “I’ve been working on the railroad.” ♪♫
He whistles while he works?
Or…oh dear. He *toots* a lot?
No to both – he just tells them where to shove it.
(That’s the term for ‘parking’ the empty rail cars.)
So, he *squeezes* them in.
Sweet story time:
About 11 years ago, I lived on one side of the river (in WV) and my oldest daughter had just moved to the other side (in Ohio – exactly across from me) with my 5 year old grandson. It was the first time he was ever far from me, and we were really close. When he was sad, I used to tell him to listen for the train whistle when it went by, and that meant I was thinking of him. (Being so close, we could both hear it at the same time.) Turns out that, at that very time, Andrew was the engineer on the very trains that ran up and down the river, so he was the one blowing the whistle at those times!
*melts*
*eyes fill with tears*
*melts some more*
Awwww! I loves it!
Absolutely lovely! Thank you, Judy!
I know – it’s like fate that we were meant to meet, isn’t it?
Someday you’ll have to tell how you tracked each other down.
Awww… really sweet story, Judy.. *squeezes*
Looney Tunes Golden Collection DVDs have all of those and more. Even some of their heavy propaganda shorts from WWII(extremely racist).
I give WB credit for including them in their original form, no editing to meet today’s standards. For an animation nut like me it’s fascinating history.
It’s painful to watch them now…isn’t it? I agree with you about the history of animation, but I wince every time one of them comes on.
Does anyone remember – I don’t think they were Looney Tunes, maybe a Warner Bros. or Disney creation – but they would play some old music, and like, all the stuff in the kitchen would dance? The plates, utensils, appliances, etc. I loved those!
Yes! It’s completely painful to watch, and I spend half the time shocked at what they were willing to put in or thought was normal at the time. Those are one’s I don’t return to watch much, but I do find it interesting.
I do remember those Judy. I believe those were Disney shorts, but I’m having trouble finding an example online.
They did go overboard sometimes, especially the wartime ones; but I still believe that the best way to deal with a stereotype is to laugh at it. Accept it, laugh at it, and make people who think you care look ridiculous for bringing it up.
Total war does that to a people.
LIFE Magazine 1943.
Nuff said.
boomerang on cartoon network used to don’t know if they still do…i think. idk
Now give me some fin…. noggin… Duuuuuuude!!!!!
Time to find Nemo
I am sorry to inform you but Nemo doesn’t have the desire to be found at this moment.
Time to go to my happy place…on Mountwannahockalougie
Watch out for the RING OF FIRE.
♪and it burns, burns, burns…♪
…and you melt, melt, melt…
♪ I’ll stop the world and melt with you… ♫
♪ smoke gets in your eyes…♪
SHARKBAIT…OOO…ba…ba-doo….
Does anyone know the way to 42 wallaby way?
MINE! MINEMINEMINEMINEMINEMINEMINEMINE!!!!
Ah, wie geil, so was muss man erst mal drauf haben zu sagen vor der Kamera, ich wette, der Typ ist schwul ^^
huh? but i approve.
He said you were gay.
…and he approved.
Actually, it does in fact say that, although not necessarily to C-boy. Fuzz does not approve of gay-negative language (nor of die Trolle). The German means something like this:
.
“Ah, how cool, so that’s what someone has to say the first time in front of the camera, I bet the guy is gay.”
Was his mom gay? Did she go to college?
♫ Gay sera, sera, Happy he’ll be, he’ll be. ♫
almooost…
“Ah, how cool, you got to have nuts [or no brain] to say that in front of a camera, i bet this guy is gay.”
something like that…
well put
Um sowas zu können muss man nichts drauf haben.
OK, for all you trolls out there:
1. NO, he didn’t die.
2. It’s not a win. It’s a fail. Go away.
3. He was not photoshopped.
Is this 4. prophet?
.
(or a non-profit spiritual organization?)
And for the record, NO, you are not f*rst.
” … to boldy NO when no one has gone before … “
Yes! and: SAFETY is always third!
And yes, he sounds like he’s done quite a few barrel rolls (and landed at the bottom).
Wipeout!!!!
Brain like an etch-a-sketch…instant tabula rasa.
In a way, making him a Lockeness monster.
Hume are you referring to?
Etch-a-Sketch Manual. I am totally lost without it.
==========
Q: My Etch-A-Sketch has all of these funny little lines all over the screen.
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: How do I create a New Document window?
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: How do I set the background and foreground to the same color?
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: What is the proper procedure for rebooting my Etch-A-Sketch?
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: How do I save my Etch-A-Sketch document?
A: Don’t shake it.
LOL!!!
*tries to keep laughter down in the workplace*
*snork*
Yet my department would still get calls asking for technical help.
LIES!!! I stopped calling since I found the manual online.
I’ve got calls like this before:
Q: What is the proper procedure for rebooting my Etch-A-Sketch?
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: How do I pick it up?
A: With your hands.
Q: Oh. OK. How do I shake it?
A: With your hands.
Q: I don’t get it, can’t you just send me a new one?
First tech question:
Is your light plugged in?
Did you turn it on and off?
Do live in Iraq? Does your neighborhood have power?
Oh, do live in Iraq! It’s marvelous.
What is it, Brewski, I’m arranging matches.
Well, I don’t know Brewski baby — I think his brain may well be dead, and perhaps he did somehow win the survival lottery (certainly did not do it on his own); and, if his brain is not dead — then it is probably photoshopped ….
And if he is photoshopped, then it’s a total win, like.
(JeffSpicoli)
Well Stu I’ll tell you, surfing’s not a sport, it’s a way of life, you know, a hobby. It’s a way of looking at that wave and saying, “Hey bud, let’s party!”
(/JeffSpicoli)
Aloha, Mr. Hand.
“You dick!”
I was waiting for him to ask the reporter where he got his jacket.
you douches on this site are so fast to cry TROLL!!!
GET A LIFE, IT IS ALL ONE LINERS…AND STFU
Stand Tall For USA?
Win.
AAaaaaaaahahahah!!!!
*pushes troll in boiling vat of BaconLube*
Leila – 2
trolls – 0
If you’ll note, I didn’t direct that at any poster on this fail. But you just proved your classification.
Uh oh Brewski — Are you the boy who cried “TROLL?”
Hardly. Anybody who knows me knows that I always give people excessive benefit of doubt. I’m usually the last person to cry troll.
And I will challenge anybody to dispute that.
Personally, I don’t really think of “That’s a WIN!” posters as trolls, it’s just somebody who is ignorant and doesn’t realize we get that post 20 times a day. A “Troll” is somebody who intends their post to hurt or attack. For example, STFU.
But we throw around the “Troll” term a bit loosely sometimes, and use it to refer to a newbie who inadvertently posts one of the 4 or so tiresome posts that we see every single fail.
Easy there Brewski … just makin a joke. You have no reason to be so defensive. I think we all got your back. {{{{{{{{{{{{{Brewski}}}}}}}}}}}}} and a great big **SQUEEEEEEEEEEZZZZEEEE**
I know Elsa, no worries!! I know you’re a good friend. My comment was directed at some of the newbies and other non-regulars who may have viewed my post as hostile. Sorry, I should have made that clear. I am a bit defensive when a stranger or lurker accuses me of something like that, because it’s simply not true.
“But we throw around the “Troll” term a bit loosely sometimes, and use it to refer to a newbie who inadvertently posts one of the 4 or so tiresome posts that we see every single fail.”
Erm, sorry ’bout that. I just had to do it once. I’m done now. Never again.
No problem, I just ignore those posts (as do most others). They actually don’t bother me much, as long as they don’t fill the entire blog. And we regulars sometimes use it in a satirical way. Hence the posts with stuff like “OMG PHOTOSHOPED!!!1!!one!!”. It’s just making fun of the cliche post.
PS: I am annoyed by the FIRST-ers. I really hope you aren’t one of them. Talk about a pointless and annoying game. Some regulars try to post first, just so we don’t have to put up with that juvenile crap at the top of the blog.
Erm…Brewski….
*facepalm*
Argh!!
I’ve been talking to a FIRST-er?!?!
*headdesk headdesk headdesk*
*tries to contain giggle*
(*snerk…cough…snork*…ahem…)
gigglesnort!
*Snickers*
*Posts pictures of Brewski contorting with the enemy*
So that’s where my Twister game went! Brewski!
*offers Brewski a down feather pillow for his desk*
*collects down feather pillow for herself*
Aaaaaachooooooo!!!!!
*takes some Benadryl*
Aw. Allergies, or a cold?
Dragon – that’s the second time you made me laugh out loud today!
The first was “lactose” – I truly did not see that one coming!
Yay!
I can’t believe I stepped right into that. I could have taken the time to scroll up. But noooo…
I won’t do it again. It was my first post on FB and I just wanted to do it once.
*looks at ground ashamedly*
There is NEVER a good time to post “first”. Ever.
We’ll be watching, and at least one of us is always here.
Looks over the letter J with my good eye.
I think I need my ear tubulars … um … waxed.
Lol, ew. I can’t stop !magining this guy at a job interview.
“like whoaaaaa pshhhhhhh bro i’m gonna totally manage your money”
Is he drunk?
worse, he’s a surfer (no offense to any surfers here)
I surf the web, does that count?
Duuuuude!!!!
Like, so do I and stuff…
*body slams Aja*
Dude, did you get pitted? Did you smack the lip?
Ya dude…didn’t you see? I was like, whoa and like WHOAAA and like whooooooaaaaaa!!!! Totally like smacked the b*tch up…
Tubular.
Wow!
I was wishing for a huge wave to come crashing down on him or something…
Yeah I was expecting that big wave behind him to crash into the shot. Sadly, mother nature was not able to save us from his diatribe.
She was napping.
I think she put earplugs into her ears, thus didn’t hear him & didn’t know action was required.
Can’t hear it @ work, but dude looks sloshed…
more like duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude
Too many knocks to the noggin…duuuuuuuuuuude
Don’t even ask for a transcription. It included words like “tubular”, “pitted”, and several indecipherable utterances.
Oh, what a di-vine bo-vine. Moo!
Thanks! It’s the famous butter cow from the Iowa State Fair…the fair starts next week, so I thought I’d pay homage.
*slips away to check on Patrica the calf ♀*
*slips back in*
Nice avatar.
*has a sudden craving for popcorn*
Nice, SuzieQ! I’m Judy, welcome to our home!
I thought you would say you had a sudden craving for steak?
Where’s my Judy and what have you done with her?
But it’s a butter cow!
Butter…meat…it’s all the same.
Well, they both come from cows right?
True…but one is not a permanent as the other…
Udder, anyone?
Udder what?
Udderly wonderful to see you today, my dear!
Shhh…you don’t want udders to hear.
♫Hush, hush…keep it down, now…voices dairy♪
♫ I’m not about to blow it now for all the cows. . . ♫
*milking this run for all it’s worth*
Obviously you’ve never tasted my famous buttered popcorn steak.
I just had a minor myocardial infarction reading that comment Hammy. You need to be more careful. References to buttered popcorn steak have been known to kill the elderly…
I’ve been told I can have that effect.
I’m having a whole lot of trouble trying to picture that.
I think they make a jellybean in that flavor!
♬ I don’t think you’re ready for this jelly… ♬
*reads your hips*
*jiggles*
*spoons and wiggles*
and for the record…they are nasty!!
Ever get the “earwax” flavor of Bertie Bott’s? *shudder*
OH. MY. GAWWWWWD!
I have. And the booger flavor, too.
:ick:
That’s is so grody!
*picks it up and shakes it*
*ear candles the not ear candy*
I’m impressed with the authenticity of the Bertie Bott’s, but I only nibbled the booger one. My dog looked shocked at the taste, and dogs eat their own vomit.
Oh god, vomit was another jellybean flavor.
Did you ever try the dirt flavo(u)red one??
It tasted like…like DIRT!!!
RIGL with Dilly
That’s not the only sick things dogs do.
*barfs*
On a more pleasant note, this is reminding me of Demeter colognes from a while back, they were pricey but came in a lovely grass scent, the dirt one was actually really nice, too. I don’t know why. I loved the gin and tonic one, also, but I smelled kind of drunk.
Yup, ZA, I don’t think you’ve ever had to deal with a pit bull dragging used tampons out of the trash.
And Rhode Island General Laws?
My brother got the vomit flavored one, and then he breathed in my face. It sure smelled authentic. Better him than me.
I always wished I had a brother. Thanks for curing that!
[HOMER]Mmmm…. buttered popcorn steak.[/HOMER]
I have no idea what that would be — but since I love both steak and buttered popcorn, I’m in.
I guess I’ll have to eat my buttered popcorn jelly bellies now. Are you pleased with yourself?!
Hmmm… What was the “HOMER” spose ta do?
That indicates that I’m channeling Homer Simpson.
Yes!
And if you run out, have some of mine!
About 45 minutes from here, there’s a Sarris chocolate factory, and they also have Jelly Bellies – you can buy any flavor you want. I bought a bag just of buttered popcorn flavor!
So, I’ve been reading (viewing?) failblog for several months, but never posted…until now. I live less than 2 miles from the Sarris chocolate headquarters in Canonsburg PA. It’s…addictive. And now you mention that, I think I need to stop on my way home from work this afternoon!!!!
Thanks, Judy! I’m certainly liking it here…very nice…
Though I’m starting to fear for my life…
*slowing searching the room for a quick exit*
Fear not! Failfriends do not nom on each other. (But, just in case, don’t get too close to Abstract.)
We don’t???
*clears throat*
*taps foot*
Just no actual consumption of the Failfriends. The occasional nom should be okay though…
*muffled voice*
*offers cookie under the desk*
EEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! Thank you.
*noms cookie in a few bites*
*squeezes DW from under the desk*
Can we just taste them??
Tasting is frowned upon @ FB.
Shagging is allowed.
Tasting while shagging is acceptable.
*tastes*
Yup.
DrB! My fellow rugby fan!
*Squeeze*
*wonders about one post*
*squeeze!*
We do not eat our failfriends.
At least some of us don’t!
We have a support group for that.
*Schedules another support group meeting SOON!*
Soon? More like ASAP!
*noms bowl of Rice Krispies for lunch*
*stops and looks for Moomin*
*grabs Bearly*
*puts Suzie in a freezer*
*hails a limo and rides to support group meeting with them*
Hi, my name is Leila and I am a recovering sex addict.
Hah! That reminds me. I had some tacky girl in my store yesterday. This group of women comes in all the time. They’re sooooo skeezy. This girl kept walking around saying “Oh. My. God. I’m a sex addict so being in here is, like, so hard. I see all this stuff and get all turned on and, like, HAVE to have sex, like, right now. I’m so horny.” She was so loud and offensive, I had other customers leaving because of it. What is wrong with some people???
Attention whores don’t just live on the interwebz.
*squeeze*
*Squeeze*
This is true. I can’t wait until I’m not working here anymore. For some reason, this store is a big draw for the crude, crass, and just plain irritating people.
*squeeze Chani*
That woman made me feel like I need a shower now.
I’m sorry, Chani, but did you just say, “for some reason” – I mean, really, you don’t know???
*squeezies*
Hehe. Oh, I know. I definitely know. The whole problem is that my boss pays better than any other peon retail job I could possibly get around here. *Sigh*. The bills demand my putting up with it all.
If you get regular visits from sex addicts, I would think you’d get regular visits from guys hanging around and waiting for the sex addicts!
Now THAT is just creepy!
*muffles through the door*
Is it safe?? Can I come out now??
I don’t know…it’s your first day and already are trying to eat someone. Not a good start …
I wasn’t trying to eat Moomin…just making sure he wasn’t around since Bearly was talking about making us into a snack…
Seriously, I had Rice Krispies for lunch…no joke
Quaker corn squares for me.
Lonely can of soup for me.
*sigh*
Well, at least we have tomorrow to look forward to. There’s always something on the grill at the cuddle puddle!
Leftover homemade chicken enchiladas with verde sauce!! Mmmmm.
*ducks thrown objects*
Psgetti and meatballs. Yummmm!
Skipped lunch <–
shut up brewdouche
YEA!!! Thanks, Leila…
*quick squeeze*
*puts lid on vat and adds a little more heat*
Wasn’t that vat where all of the used Baconlube is ke…..8O Eeeewwww
Leila: 3
Trolls: 0
That’s what I was thinking, moo indeed! I wonder what his name is. Kona maybe?
His name is being withheld pending notification.
DW, please come save my book reference!
Suzie, is that an eyeless cow?
Zombie cow…now there’s a thought…
Be careful, ZA might have his way with her. He is our resident Zombie and sometimes abstract has the tendency to flip back and forth with being a zombie and all…
I’ll keep that in mind…thanks for the heads-up!
Apparently my reputation precedes me. I just wish it wasn’t such a badass all the time, it makes me look worse than I really am.
Shut your mouth! I’m just talking about Zombie, damnnnnnn right.
Can ya dig it?
He’s a complicated dead man.
Correction – un-dead.
Huh. I’m not his woman, I don’t think I understand him.
But no one understands him but his worms.
He’s got the worms that won’t crawl out when there’s danger all about.
Who is the Zombie that would risk his neck (or arm, or leg) for his brother man?
*RIGL*
You folks slay me.
Zombie you are one of the nicest one on here dude.
He sounds like someone on Rohypnol reading a dictionary.
He accidenty all the words.
What should he do?
What the hell was he talking about???
Surfing…I think.
I’d just like to remind everyone that not everybody from SoCal sounds like that.
And not all of us native West Virginians marry our cousins. Well, except my aunt and uncle, but that’s another story….
And not all of us Utahn’s are polygamists with 300 children.
Ahem!! So when are you picking up the 298 kids you dropped off here?
And not all people from Seattle wear Goretex, drink gourmet coffee and microbrews, and work at tech companies.
Just the vast majority do.
Ha, I’m not even getting started on Ohio. They’re all true, just leave it at that.
What is the stereotype for Chicago? Oh right, the mob. I got nothin’. To the best of my knowledge I have never met a mobster.
What is the stereotype for Texas?
Honey, you need to pull your cowboy hat down over that big hair of yours while you’re drivin’ your land yacht with the horns on the grill out to get your nails done!
Weird!! Did you do that in some sort of accent? Cuz I can totally ‘hear’ it.
Did you see my Yemen clickie from previous fail?
Yep on both counts! I’se from the Carolinas, and we can talk with a real purty accent, too! We ain’t quite as bad as some of them other states, though (I’m looking at you, Alabama!).
Thanks – like I said back there, I didn’t get “north within the continent of Africa” out of what you said – I got “due north,” which is why I thought Yemen. I know what you meant now, though!
Philadelphia was recently voted “Ugliest City in America” because the majority of people here are just hideous. It’s rough out there. And I can’t believe I’m more grossed out by that than the constant unsolved murders.
Oh, but the dog the next block over only got second place in the World’s Ugliest Dog contest on Animal Planet.
Buzz, your girlfriend, Woof!
“You have won second place in a beauty contest.” WTwoof?
You took a chance with that community chest.
Move dog directly to jail. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.00.
Awwww, I just got Bark Place.
*takes ugly dog for a walk on the Boardwalk*
You should go for Boardwalkies.
Dangit!
*shakes fist at Brewski*
Woo hoo! I own Boardwalk! Brewski, you and your ugly dog owe me 189 bones for rent. Pay up!
No WAY I’m walking this thing around my valuable properties. I just put a hotel on that boardwalk. Clicky, I see this dog ALL THE TIME.
…where the dog can let go the Water Works.
Just keep him out of Marvin’s gardens.
Go bark three spaces?
And where is Fuzzy Coyote Ugly?
He must be asleepin’ in his buggy cart on Free Amish Parking.
MM HHMMMM
I saw that Bearly!
Big hair, big ego and y’all ALL wear cowboy boots and hats EVERYWHERE!
*was born in Texas*
Yeah, the Gold Coast is not exactly known for being at the center of Chicago’s mob underworld. Think more like the Cicero area.
True, true. I have certainly seen gang activity. Just not mob. And what I saw was near the bar where I worked, in the Humbolt Park, Ukrainian Village area.
That’s funny, we have a Gold Coast here as well. In fact, that surfer was smack-dab in the middle of it.
I’m not entirely sure why they call it that here. I think it has to do with the concentration of rich families. I think. That I live in the same area amuses me greatly. It does make dating a bit difficult though.
As if dating isn’t hard enough already.
I can’t even date a milk carton.
You have a strange notion of quartship.
I think he’s more the gallon-t type of courter.
I hear he’s fluid on the dance floor.
He’s always the litre, someone’s got to take charge.
I have a friend who couldn’t dance because he had to have two of his toes amputated. It was so sad…it’s much easier to dance when you don’t lactose.
Quiet a lead in ther DW – I was worried the comment might Lactase
It’s too bad the surgeons couldn’t soy them back on.
He will just have to choc-olate it up to experience
Dairies other things to do if he lactose toes.
No kidding! They hear what area I live in and think I have money. Then they find out I don’t and they vanish. This all happens in the first thirty minutes of meeting them. I’m using this to weed out the jerks.
Gotta have a weeding system in place!
I only made one or two little forays into the dating scene, and I must say, there are a whooooole lotta weeds out there! Not saying there aren’t great guys out there… They’re just hard to find through the rest of the muck!
Ladies aren’t the only ones who have to deal with bad dates. The last date I went on she wanted to go to a bar, for a first date….
Seems like the weeding system I have going on needs to upgraded to a flamethrower.
Chicago?
Windy City, cow kicked over lantern, burnt down the city, that’s all I got.
Texas? Everything’s bigger.
Jimbo, you can say anything you want about Ohio, and I’ll probably agree. I only moved in with Andrew last January from WV, so I still feel like I’m from there.
IOWA = Idiots Out Wandering Aimlessly – ??
No, not from there — just passing on offensive stereotypes
I was told (by someone from there) it’s “Idiot Out Walking About” . I never understood why she felt that way.
Well, that is less offensive I think — walking about is not as bad as wandering aimlessly … it could actually be positive — good excercisers those Iowans!!
In Nebraska we have corn. That’s it. Oh, maybe some wheat, but mostly corn. And the residents of the town I live in call it Podunk, so that’s how I have it listed on my myspace page.
Corn is good to time motility.
*flees thread*
We sure are…and you see all of us every August at the Fair!
I went to that once. It’s huge. Lots of greasy food to nom down and then puke back up on the Zipper, and other rides.
Zipper!
*Falls on floor*
*Cringes*
Hey…I resemble that remark…
Oh, wait…
*swaps resemble with resent*
I actually like most of the people in Ohio. It’s the weather I hate.
He did a rail bang up job on your SoCal !mage.
At least a few sound like Ryan Seacrest, right?
Regrettably, yes.
Contrary to popular belief, we all don’t live in igloos here in Canada.
yea – and some of you have pools!!
That aren’t frozen all year round.
{Elsa_Mama} How are ya,
todayHours later 12 since we last spoke?/typed?AAAAA, too many thoughts at once. 12 hours after we last spoke.
I think he is the definition of Douche Bag, I may be wrong
I could think of a few other people who would fit that bill better.
i doubt you could be wrong
So, this guy surfs in the shallow end of the gene pool?
Does this video remind anyone else of Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure?
Bill and Ted made a bit more sense, but they pulled out their air guitars more.
You can’t blame anyone for busting out the air guitar though. I was just tearing mine up to some Weezer.
Just don’t do it to any bogus Journey!
.
(actually, Perry’s got a great voice, but I’m just sayin’)
Wait, what Journey do you consider bogus?
Maybe, but nobody messes with Steve Perry when I’m around.
And thank you for putting “Oh, Sherry” in my head for the rest of the day!
It could have been Don’t Stop Believin….
Fail. That was Eddie Money.
. . . or so I hear.
*shifty eyes*
(Or are my ’80s memories getting cloudy? Gosh, that’d be a tragedy! I might start thinking big hair, tight pants and shoulder pads aren’t such terrible ideas after all.)
A bogus journey of a thousand miles, begins with Bill and Ted’s step two (the sequel).
I want to see them go to Atlantis!
And get lost?
On surfboards were the Twelve:
The poet, the physician, the farmer, the scientist,
The magician and the other so-called Gods of our gnarly legends.
Ted Turner was there as well, and the remains of the Coca-Cola bottling plant.
I want to decide who lives and dies.
Oh, Crow.
I beer evelin bing you day.
Thick McRunfast! Blast Hardcheese!
I don’t know if this will help but, Ho ho ho.
I rarely miss a reference from you, Marius, but I need a bigger hint…
King is the Scorpio Killer.
It’s been a long time but I believe the movie is The She Creature.
Man, has it ever been a long time. Going in the Netflix queue.
Totally!
He sounds like he’s about to pass out – either that or he hasnt slept for a week.
Of course, there’s always the possibility that he’s retarded.
Alas, I don’t think he has an excuse. That’s just how surfers talk.
Well, it was more of a revelation.
You’ve got my attention.
Did I link a video on here yesterday?
Yes.
I see…
Do you not remember this?
I didn’t get back on my computer after I told everyone I was going outside.
Then someone knows the email address you post under, Qwaz.
Wait. I know what happened.
And that is….?
Yes?
Yes.
YESSS OHHH YESSSSSS
*Notices everyone staring*
:shocked:
*Scrambles for nearest exit*
(Sorry if it double posts)
I’ll have what the Emp’s having.
Wonder if she will be up to it…
Ok, My cousin is in town. He’s like 11/ 12 I always forget. Anyway, He watches crap like that all the time (Mr. Bababababooyah) and he had the computer yesterday. Paranoia got me, My appologies.
But I’m watching him when he’s on from now on.
qwaz and coz … bein’ cozy
I suggest you make a guest account and log out of your own account when you are done.
I think I’m gonna reate one right… now.
*eyes Qwaz*
Isn’t it time for you to go outside young man?
I went ahead and got that over with for today. So now I can chill for the remainder of the evening. Whee!
Would you take me outside Leila???
*waits with baited breath*
Eeewwwww…Skrat’s breath smells like worms!
Must be the latest Bertie Bott flavor.
I was going to say Skratt’s breath smells like sweaty balls but it would be inappropriate and highly unlady like of me. *angel smiley*
Good thing you didn’t say it, Leila!
Hmmmmmm…… that is a revelation.
A proverbial coloss(i)al Quaz impostor? Lamentable.
The question is — Did we see you??
If somebody posts on Failblog, and nobody is there to read it, does it still post?
“Nobody is there to read it.” I don’t understand that concept.
*one handed golf clap*
Do I want to know about it?
*cowers*
d00d is a genius! Must be a good surfer!
doesn’t even look like a surfer, more like a retarded ass monkee
ahahaha i like it how haole boy says brah but he’s from HB, I hope we all don’t talk like that, but then again pigeon is way worse. this guys funny, he’s going directly to heaven.
don’t feed those pidgins, kev…
a popular dish of boneless poultry breast pounded and rolled around cold unsalted butter, then breaded and fried?
Hehe, you said poultry
pounded not choked
Well, that was atrocious. The Today Show should drop Al Roker’s big fat ass and hire this guy to do the weather. Jesus would approve.
he was like whoaaa.. and i was like heeeey.. in he was like no waaaaay..and i was like yes waaaaay!! and was like that’s rad dude.. and i said i’m a chick hence the bumpers.
First
It’s like listening to my 5-year-old!
Dude, your kid needs some speech therapy like whoa.
This guy totally proves the stereotype of Americans being idiots
SHUT IT SHUT IT SHUT IT. Oh my gosh. I so hope you are not Canadian. You just added trouble, subtracted pleasure, divided attention and multiplied ignorance with one comment. You should be proud.
It’s funny, slams on Americans don’t bother me. I even mock Americans myself! But thanks Emp, I appreciate it.
*squeeze*
I still pushed him cuz I don’t feel like I want to be mocked today.
I’m just amazed at how much math he actually accomplished with what appeared at first glance to be a senseless post.
Senseless maybe, cent-less, well we did not want his two cents but we got it.
*pushes Harry V in the boiling vat of BaconLube*
Leila – 4
Trolls – 0
What do I win?
*wishes for a kitty cat*
You’ll have to ask the Powers That Be about prizes.
Well Leila, You’ve won a years supply of BaconLube, but that’s not all! You also get these handy gloves and safety goggles to protect you from boiling BaconLube. Now, you can keep all of those prizes, or go for what’s behind door #2.
Pick door #2! Pick door #2!
*poses in evening gown, gesturing seductively at door #2*
*click!*
We’re gonna need multiple copies of this photo you know.
Definitely. Also, blow one up and frame it.
POW! BLAM!
Um, the photo did it.
*snork*
You seem to have a knack for capturing my worst moments, don’t you??
*squeezes dragon anyway*
Worst? I laughed so hard the guy next door stuck his head in my office!
Oh, no! Did he get it out?!
Inquiring friends of ZombieApocalypse want to know.
Anyway…? ANYWAY???
*lower lip trembles just a little*
*Headdoor!*
Yes, it was retrieved, it just took him some time to coordinate his body from across the room. He may need some pointers from ZA
I came as soon as I could! What’s wrong?
Oh!…there, there. I’m sure Brewski can explain what he meant. In the meantime, c’mere Dragon…
*steadies lower lip…*
Ooooh…dat’s MUCH better!
*smoochity-smoooch!*
I couldn’t resist.
The living.
Sorry Leila,
I respectfully have to decline your offer. No matter how attractive that might be to you, BaconLube just isn’t my thing
Whoooa sorry peeps I was just catchin the total wind.
And like it was so hot and in, drop to the side and over.
Dude, that’s like so totally gnarly! Whoa! I mean like surfs up, little dude!
Did you hear Zomboman that I got engaged.
His head. Has been smashed.
I’m getting a little smashed, man!
I’ll take what he’s having! Must be good stuff.
He knew he was being ridiculous, which makes him hilarious.
last one … last one.
Nobody is allowed to write anymore.
I don’t believe it.
Unbelieveable ^^
This is not better.
He’s no greatest American hero.
Your comment has me walking on air. I never thought I could feel so free.
Who could it be?
Believe it or not , I’m not home.
*beeeep*
*can’t stop giggling*
hahahahaha! Damn you AA! Worst earworm ever! hahahaha!
Good thing we type rather than write here.
*wipes brow*
*isn’t sure whose brow she just wiped*
Why theng-kew!
And an avatar change for NS? *squeeze*
How are ya m’lady?
I’m fighting a migraine, if you must know … but thanks for asking.
Other than that, I’m relatively dandy. How are you?
*Offers NS some T3 and a neck massage*
Hopefully this takes some stress and the pain away. I am doing relatively ok.
Thanks, Emperor!
The pleasure was all mine. Take this hot compress too.
*Places compress on the back of the neck while gentle lavender and lilac scented humidifier runs.*
It clears the sinuses and helps with most headaches by clearing the mind and relieving stress.
Type? I peck with one hand usually. In fact I may be the fastest pecker in the south!
*rimshot*
I wanted a RIGL!
*pouts*
*RIGL*
I am not sure that you are authorized to administer RIGL’s. But it made me smile anyway.
Yeah I’ll probably be hearing about it in the morning.
Well he can keep his Zombie-ness, my tattered clothing is beginning to chafe.
Why is this funny? A surfer talking like a surfer… like, no wai!
Who is laughing? Most of us are scratching our head wondering what the hell he said. No time for laughter.
It is a very cool language. I like it.
Duuude.
Totally sicky gnar gnar brah. yup….that’s how we breed’em here in Cali. I feel like such a proud papa right now.
should this be on engrish?
Heaven help me – I’m having a craving for a peanut butter and fluff sandwich (no – not Fluffy … the fish is safe
). I’m not even hungry – but I want it!!!
I’ll have my man Brewski make you a sandwich. He’s trained.
Thank you, Fluffy!
Peel you a grape …
Since you’re still here (hopefully NOT still suffering that migrane), I’ll share a story I wouldn’t tell most people. Early in my parents marriage they were visiting with my dad’s family. Dad got up to get a drink and asked my mom if she wanted anything. Being who she is, her comeback was “you could stick a broom up your ass and sweep the floor while you’re at it”.
True story.
LOL!
I’m still here, currently winning the battle (thanks to pharmaceuticals). I just need to get a bunch of work done in case the headache tears down my defenses before tomorrow.
How are you, ZA? I haven’t seen you much this week.
What do you use for migraines? I use Butalbital, and it knocks me out cold.
I use Maxalt – as long as I catch the headache before it goes full-blown, it can usually do a good job of keeping the darn thing at bay… and it doesn’t make me loopy. I wouldn’t mind having a prescription for something that WOULD knock me out though. If I’m miserable at home & nothing else is working, that would be quite helpful.
My doctor actually put me on a low-dose beta-blocker to help prevent migraines. I think it has helped.
I don’t get migraines very often, but the few I’ve had were completely debilitating. I don’t know how folks who get them regularly can cope well enough to get work done.
*squeeze*
Practice, practice, practice, I think. My husband gets one every once in a while & says the same thing, Admiral. Mom doesn’t know how I can function with them.
Really, they vary quite a bit in intensity. I can work pretty well with mild ones — they’re more annoying than debilitating. Sometimes if they’re a little worse, I can work as long as I’m wearing sunglasses (light is my major foe during migraines). When I start losing the ability to think (generally I know this if I’m staring at two numbers and can’t figure out which is greater & which is lesser), I know it’s getting bad & I need to go home.
I try to keep functioning as long as I can. I don’t like the idea of the headache “winning,” if that makes any sense. I’ve gotten them occasionally at Disneyland or on other vacations & just muddled through because there was no way I was going to let a headache ruin my fun.
Light gets me too! And sound. High pitched noises could kill me. What bothers me the most are the sparkles in my vision. I can’t even read, because the words disappear on the page. All I can do is lie down with a sleep mask in a quiet dark room. I hate it when my own body holds me hostage.
Whatever I had was beyond the reach of conscious effort to resist…nauseousness, disorientation, the pain was the least of the unpleasantness I was experiencing.
I am very lucky in that regard — I don’t tend to become nauseated unless the migraine is exceptionally severe. Sound bothers me to a certain extent (my child knows to keep quiet if Mommy has a headache), but light is the big problem. My eyes are pretty light-sensitive on the best of days. I have the fluorescent light over my desk off for just that reason. I can deal with incandescent lighting WAY better than fluorescents. Fluorescent lights are evil and must be destroyed.
My husband and one of my co-workers can tell if I have a bad headache just by looking at me. I guess I crinkle my eyes and/or cringe from bright lights in a certain way when it’s because of a headache. My little girl tries to do anything she can to help me when she knows I’m hurting. She’s covered me with a blanket, read stories to me, and brought me snacks. She also kisses my head to make it better. She’s a sweet little thing.
I’ve had the sum total of one migraine my entire life…I was in sixth grade and it hit during gym class. That was the first (though not the last) time in my life that I truly thought I was going to die.
*squeezes nightshayde and all others who suffer from migraines*
I can count the migraines I’ve experienced on one hand, thankfully.
Hiya, DW! Have they fixed Bejeweled Blitz yet? I think I’m in withdrawal…
*squeeze*
*snork*
I haven’t even looked yet. Right now I’m feeding my other addiction…a goofy little game called Kingdom of Loathing (not on Facebook).
Oooh! I always wanted to see a sabre-toothed lime in the wild!
Admiral: If you’re experiencing migraines in your hand, you’re doing it wrong.
*snerk*
It might be a little more bearable, though.
I’m outta here, Failpeeps. Have a lovely evening (or whatever time of day/night it is for you).
Hi and bye, NS!
Night, Shayde!
That’s what I get for taking matters into my own hands.
(It’s nice to see you, LCB.)
‘Night, Night.
G’night! I hope you feel better!
G’night, shayde!
LCB!! *squeezies*
*checks sparklies*
Whew. Good to see you, gf!
*goes to feed sabre-toothed lime*
LCB, thanks for the lol.
Good night nightshayde.
According to my doctor, what I get aren’t migraines, but rather cluster headaches. We’ve tried many other options. I refuse to take anything with acetomiaphin (I know I didn’t spell it right) so it limits what I can take. My doc figured out that I wasn’t drug seeking when Imitrex made my headaches worse. I’ll ask my doc about Maxalt, and see if it would work for me.
Oooof. I’ve heard that cluster headaches are quite nasty. You have my sympathy. *gentle squeeze* I know that Maxalt is specifically for migraines, so I’m not sure it would help with cluster headaches.
Does Vitamin B help with those? I saw a news report that said it helps some people with migraines, so now I take an extra B whenever I think a migraine is coming. Same for magnesium. I think they help — not sure if they help because they really help or simply because I think they’ll help. I’m totally fine with the placebo effect — whatever works!
All I know is, when I took Imitrex I was pond ing my head on the floor because THAT felt better than the headache. I don’t get them as often as I used to, the headaches being tied to stress levels. Apparently the headaches are tied to my neurological condition, and stress. Lucky me.
*ahem* Pounding my head.
It fascinates me how differently different people respond to different medications. You’d think that since we’re all made up of roughly the same chemicals, we’d all react the same to other chemicals … but not so much.
Weird.
No, not so much.
Ask your doctor if opiates are right for you!
Hiya, Jules. How are you this evening?
*squeeze*
Mine seems to think so!
I think you are contagious.
*goes to cupboard*
I talked to Mom — we have a spare jar of Fluff at home so I don’t even have to stop at the market on the way. Score!
Rule #17 Keep a spare jar of fluff for emergencies
I approve of Rule #17.
It means something to me!
*orders a 6 pack of fluff*
*wipes drool off chin*
he is totally high on something…
I am reminded of the turtle from Finding Nemo. “First you were like, woah! Then we were like, woah! Then you were like, woah…”
Exactly! Thanks for reminding me, they were adorable.
Yea dude. Alright chip run them through the exit process.
Hold on to your exit dude, etc…
an argument in favor of eugenics if i ever saw one.
This is actually a win. For all of us.
BIG BOLD PENIS
Wow. It reminds of that show on MTV. Theres a guy on it that calls himself “Dank” which means “way bomb” by his definition. nuff said. lol
Dank = good ganja
Please solve for x.
x=bad ganja
Ack you’re right!
It’s been a while since I’ve smoked…
My brain is like so not functioning, dude.
Whoa! Dude, I like so totally know what you mean! Gnarly!
Dude! His brain is so like, “kaplooy,” then it’s like, “kapoosh,” then it’s all like, “zoom,” out through his ear, dude!
I lol’d when i read “kaplooy”.
This is quite annoying. A troll that trolls another troll(me). I suppose the surfer dude made more sense than this guy.
Sorry, I thought it was quite an amusing word.
I’ll shut up now.
Eh, it’s okay. Being a troll myself, I am more forgiving than others.
…
I lol’d too…
I know. I had a crappy day today, so I’m a bit more mad than usual. You know Office Space, where the printer is totally broken and it pisses everyone off. That’s basically what happened. Or should I say: dude! The printer was like “kerchow, kerchow!” and then the paper was like “crunch!” and then, like, all the ink got all like, “splorikity splotk” all over the printer. Whoa.
He isn’t a troll, he is welcome here, you are not.
*Brings IS away from CO and offers him cookies*
So long as you do not try any more impersonations you will be find IS.
You seemed to totally ignore the fact that I (kinda) forgived him! Oh well, I guess I shouldn’t expect any better from an army of people trying to make me look stupid.
If it makes you feel any better IS, I will say sorry again. And here’s cookies.
Forgived? FORGIVED???
And on that note.. TRYING??? *sigh* It would appear we don’t need much help with that one.
I done forgotted what I was gonna say. Would you forgived meh?
(Oh, my sleep deprived brain)
Shouldn’t that be depriven?
Don’t you absolutely love how it’s always everyone else’s fault when someone ends up looking like an idiot?
I do. I just loooOOOOOooooove that.
Of course it’s someone else’s fault! There’s no such thing as accountability here.
I think I just got a month’s recommended dose on irony from this thread alone.
I know. Who needs irony supplements when you have Failblog?
I don’t see it? Is it on my account, the irony that is?
Never mind on that one. How are we tonight though?
Avis I really would like to thank you for coming to my defense, multiple times now. It really means alot to me.
*squeeze*
The feeling of belonging/being worth the defense gives me the fuzzies.
Your welcome? I’d do the same for most regulars. As I’m sure you would too.
*picks a fight with myself to see what happens*
Jenny you leave yourself alone. Eww that sounded dirty.
*giggles*
You forgave him for an offense he did not commit!
Should I go to the police today and say thanks for not arresting me today for that robbery I didn’t do at the supermarket? NO!
Who are you that your forgiveness means something? You his minister, a higher person in his faith. If he did something wrong, you are not the one he needs to forgive him for it. Don’t place yourself on that pedestal.
And who are you to tell me that I’m worth nothing? Who are you to tell me that I’m stupid for mistakingly make an assumation about a person I’ve never met before, and that I should be punished for that because it provides fodder for you to direct your hatred to? I will tell you one thing, you aren’t the emperor of me, and you sure don’t get to tell me how I should feel about myself.
Do we get to tell you that a few more grammar classes might be in order? because they are.
I didn’t do any of those things. These delusions of yours, you need to stop the as soon as possible.
I never said you were worthless.
Never said you were stupid.
Shouldn’t assume, you know how the rest of the saying goes.
Never claimed to be your Emperor.
Didn’t tell you how you should feel about yourself.
Categorically disproved all your attacks. Please do not make up situations when the real ones are in plain sight.
I am honestly sick of this. You’re all hypocrite, every single one of you. Everything you to say is in an attempt to bully me into submission, then when you tell I’m not allowed to forgive someone for wronging them, I come up to respond to that, but anything I say is irrelevant. You may think you’ve got me on the run, but you’re fighting a losing battle by the act of even fighting. You should just ignore me, it is less effort on your part, and guess what? I might even get bored someday and leave. Last thing, don’t you dare pull that “Avis is backing up Emperor” crap. You don’t need backup against an inferior debater, especially when you clearly have more people on your side than I do. I have myself. AlBut I think that is enough for me.
(And I’m currently on my iPod right now, so my grammar is going to be terrible. Deal with it.)
““Avis is backing up Emperor” crap. You don’t need backup against an inferior debater,” Then why continue to remark on me having people on my side. Stop putting things down our throats. We are not trying to bully you we are just laying out how the situation actually went.
*sigh*
I rest my case.
Clearly, we are both too stubborn to listen to each other. Can we agree to disagree then? I know I have lost, but this will never be settled until we decide to dislike each other and get on with our lives.
I do not dislike you, just be responsible for what you have written. I read what you wrote, listened to you, even categorically proved my point. Now you are looking for a way out saying this is just a difference of opinion. Do what you will. I don’t care. Just don’t call me stubborn, I am sometimes but in this case I do not think I was. I leave room for the possibility of being wrong.
You rest your case? I didn’t question your right to forgive someone. To forgived them yes. I question that.
You have yourself. That’s great. For the record, that’s all ANY OF US HAVE. And it’s enough for us. Playing the victim just doesn’t go over well with us, FYI.
This. Is. Ridiculous.
I honestly can’t comprehend how stubborn someone can be that they can’t admit their faults, just because their friends said they are fine. You ARE bullying.
“You are not welcome.” -exclusion
You can’t even just admit to disliking someone and just be done with it. Didn’t I say something about ignoring me? Yeah, I AM more stubborn, annoying, etc. But if you like provacation so much, then I’m happy to provide you with a little fodder. You guys tell me I’ve got the facts wrong, so I go back and look at everything past. I see that I’m stubborn enough to think my points are perfectly valid. In fact, that’s human nature, but could you at least look back at your comments? I will leave you alone if you say that you think you are perfectly valid, and don’t try to provoke things. Just, please, all this anger swirling in my head is preventing my sleep.
Oh DARN! It’s preventing your sleep? *pouts* Well we can’t have THAT!
I hesitate to say this. If you lot want an unbiased (if that’s possible) opinion let me know. Warning: my opinion will probably piss everyone off.
I came hear for a laugh and found squabbling.
I’m certain it won’t piss me off, coyote.
Me too neither.
Yay! A coyote to play with!
*jumps up and down*
Look, I came here for an argument!
No, you didn’t!
Starts arguing with the MAN.
My apologies Coyote. I know that this site is a safe haven for many. This one happened to hit all my buttons. This time. I wish you all a good night, and pleasant dreams.
In the beginning Captain Obvious wrote, “Dude! His brain is so like, “kaplooy,” then it’s like, “kapoosh,” then it’s all like, “zoom,” out through his ear, dude!”
Invisible Shadow said “I lol’d when i read “kaplooy”.”
Captain Obvious missed that someone thought he had successfully said something funny and said, “This is quite annoying. A troll that trolls another troll(me). I suppose the surfer dude made more sense than this guy.”
After this things escalated and a number went ballistic. I’ll name no names.
Everyone misunderstands the written word at one time or another. Back in December someone was telling me about how dangerous the traffic was outside her apartment house. She had called 911 many a time. I said how I hoped she became an agoraphobic so as to stay safe. She took it to mean that she shouldn’t call 911 and chewed me out for not wanting to help others. A third party calmly pointed out the mistake.
What was needed here was a calm third party. Apparently none was about. We make fun of various powers that be for over reacting. I see nothing that is different from us and them. In truth I don’t see any us and them, just whole lot of we.
Relax people it is just a blog and ALL are welcome here. If one is of a utilitarian mind one could say that ALL serve a purpose here.
I got chewed out for ranting on those whom constantly cry PHOTOSHOPPED. I was told to relax. Now is the time for others to take a deep breath and look at humorous cat and dog pictures.
Enjoy!
Can we play now???
*tired from jumping up and down (and passively trying to keep things light and fresh here )*
*hands jenny a can of playdough and cookie cutters*
I was at least one of the parties that teased you about the Photoshop ranting. I didn’t mean for you to take it as a “chewing out”. Anyway, ya still didn’t come close to pissing me off. My apologies if my teasing bothered you.
I confess to not stepping in to try to end this squabble. I thought it would end sooner if I stayed out. Frankly, I wanted no part of it, and I was selfishly engaged in more enjoyable activity.
Or would you prefer a rousing game of kick ball?
COYOTE!!!! I got play-doh in my hairrrrrr.
Admiral, I was so aggravated that I just would have yelled. Sometimes it’s really better to just stay out of things.
*plays pat-a-cake with Jenny, Coyote and the Admiral*
Clarification: The kick ball game was directed at Jenny.
The Photoshop rant was at the beginning of my Screw You World state of mind. Nothing would have gone down well with me then.
I shot my mouth off this time out of habit from my time dealing with engineers and children. (not much difference there)
I am so glad to have this happy moment!
*busts out the fruit punch and cookies*
*directs hose at jenny to rinse out her hair*
Where’s NightShayde? I have a sudden craving for a peanut butter and Fluff sandwich.
I have a six pack of fluff – if anyone has PB and bread we are in business.
*fluffs Admiral’s peanut butter*
Best I can do on short notice!
*starts camp fire to make banana boats in*
Dude, do you think that we could sooooo push this to a 1000 failures in communication dude, like dudes i mean?
Not on this particular long ass thread. It is killing me to scroll up and down and refresh….
*hides bread*
What is this banana boat thingy you speak of?
This thread is starting to resemble the Trans-Atlantic Cable Jenny.
Yeah its a mission worthwhile undertaking….if it hasn’t already been done, does anybody know?
*accepts award*
Thank you, thank you all who help us achieve the longest thread in the world. We hope that it will help stop hunger and widespread panic.
*gets tangled in thread, trips, falls off stage*
*taps out message in Morse Code*
*tap*tap*tap* s…av…e
*taptap*taptap* …me…
*taptaptap*tap* ….a….
*TAP*TAP*TAP* …cookie!… *stop*
Banana boats were a YMCA summer day camp staple when I was a counselor.
1) Take a banana, with the skin on, and cut it along the inside curve, stopping short of going through the outer curve. You may want to find an adult to do this for you.
2) Carefully open it enough to stuff in as many pieces of a Hershey’s candy bar and marshmallows as you can.
3) Wrap in foil and place in fire for a few minutes.
4) Remove from fire and open up.
5) Grab spoon and dig in.
Warning: Children can eat upwards of a dozen of these with no ill effects. Adults however have been known to go into a coma after only eating a half of one.
Ok, Failboys and girls, I am to tired to scroll anymore.
Goodnight!
Nerdi- I think the last non-fail post had like 1500 comments on it. Sorry to spoil your fun.
*snork*
Sorry, guys, but more than once we’ve shot the comment count over 1,000.
It’s probably just as well…we wouldn’t want to have to call those Guinness prats, now would we?
*dives* NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
*in slow motion*
*catches Jenny in one hand, the award in the other*
*lands on prepared pile of feathers below stage*
that worked out like we rehearsed, yay!
Coyote that sounds wonderful.
Have a good night y’all!
awww shucks *kicks pebble in disappointment*
We could always rub it in their faces though, HA!
Oh well, as the eternal optimist, there’s always next time!
‘Night Jenny, Dragon, and Coyote
*thinks it good to be among failfriends, fades into sleep………….*
*tucks Coyote, Jenny, and Nerdi into bed*
They look like little angels when they’re sleeping!
*turns out the light*
I want a drink of water.
And no listening to Dr. Demento…go to sleep!
*looks at Dragon*
Finally!
*turns on radio and listens to The Shadow*
Dude, I totally can’t see the video.
aw i just love how enthusiastic he is!
it’s rather endearing hahaha
Am I the only one who thinks the surfer is taking the piss out of the newscaster??? I live in the area and speak surfer, and no one in their right mind would say all that to a newscaster if they were being serious… I really think he was screwing with them, in which case it is a surfer WIN.
this guy got dropped on his head like kelso
Kelso is a character, what is scary is this guy is a real person.
I like this guy, he is honest – or he was too long under water?
Do you mean under water too long?
*cracking up*
I’ve heard of refraction but this is REDICULOUS.
redonkulous!
Co-inkydink?
ba-donk-a-dink butt
Long John Surfer
Captain Redboard.
The sliver surfer
Sir (Hang-ten) Henry Morgan. First Pirate.
I’ll see your ba-donk-a-dink, and raise you one shiggity- shiggity-shwah.
shiggity- shiggity-NAH.
*wags tongue*
Shiggity- shiggity-CHYAH.
*Victory arm pump*
chica-chica-boom-boom
Chitty-Chitty- Bang-Bang
chub, chub
Name- Caller.
Those things are bad ass.
I almost showed this to my toddler cause I forgot how bad-ass it really was.
Wow, I could use a few of those things. I like the beginning the best.
And I say WHAT?!?*Said in Kyle’s mom’s voice from South Park*
What what what?
Alright. I’d like this cloak of invisibility off. Where are my posts? Did abstract nom them?
.
Ninja, When this surfaces because I’m talking about not being visible, TAG. Taggity tag.
Isn’t it funny how this stuff works out? ^
Aww.Haven’t done that in a little while.
How’s it going, O Monster of the Blogs?
Haha yeah.Pretty good actually, other than being really bored.
Is that why you decided to show up?
Part of the reason, also just wanted to drop in and say hi!Hi!
hi!
jinx
Now Qwaz can't talk till someone says his name!! Oh, wait...hijinks!
*Offers Jenny a soda anyways*
Yay! I’ll take grape please
Also, it needs to be in a glass bottle or can. Ice cold.
Thanks
Anything else, Your Majesty?
Well, since you asked…
*gets out body legnth scroll full of tiny script*
*Sigh*
(Why am I such a nice guy)
What’s first on this list?
Make my daughter not allergic to tomatoes. The following 99 items on the list are tomato related.
This looks like a job for… The My First Chemistry Kit!
ZA’s mother has a broom that hasn’t been used in a while…
The broom is last on my list. #762 to be exact.
Did he die?
Like, I was in the water and then SPLADOW! And then I was like, yeah man, and stuff went over me.
(Ohhhh, a choose your own version of ’stuff’ post! I love these.)
It was a plate of cold chinese food.
It as definitely dog saliva.
WAS!
You !magined it as you mean? Hee. I say he is talking about the whale bits from the explosion.
By that you mean expired oat meal, right?
Or the gutter’s contents, of which we often dwell in.
EEEWWwwwww Emp!
I think it was the contents of our bukkit.
Could someone explain to me why this is a fail, please?
(His American accent is too thick for me to understand him, and there were no subtitles.)
You fail at having any sense of the world at all.
Don’t generalize it as an American accent. Not everyone in the US speaks/sounds the same.
Indeed, as an american, I didn’t understand him! So much for stereotypes.
I’m sorry, what did you say?
Uh-huh. Ok. Sure.
Yes.
I sort of understood him. Like when someone is speaking a foreign language and you recognize a few words.He had great hand motions too!
*waves arms around spasmodically*
*Slightly out of breath from being such a spaz*
Kwapow!
Oh. Is that why you are panting???
*is relieved*
Qwaz the spaz...That’s me!
Welcome to Qwaz Spa! We offer massages, manicures, pedicures, hair stylists, and more all while at the comfort a New Kinesis Freestyle Adjustable Ergonomic Keyboard, 19 inch monitor and the fastest internet connection available.
I got a kink in my lower back. Um no not lower.
Hey!
I’ll have a pedi please! *settles in comfy chair and snoozes*
*Is doubled over*
*Notices something on back*
WIK I am not a chair. Could you move please?
*Prods Wik’s leg*
Wik?
Wiiiikkkkk?
…
*Sigh*
Emp seeing you bent over like that I can only say one thing.
Guess what’s coming!
Be gentle?
You will have to speak with he who must not be named.
Quick! Someone get Harry Potter!
‘He Who Must Not be Named’ is on his way!
We could make some money off of that idea.
Yay Money! AND look we already have 2 customers too.
Wake up WIK look we have a good connection to FailBlog and a comfy ketboard too!
*Ducks out of Jenny’s arm’s path*
Watch that *wapow* of yours.
What is with the American bashing today?
I fail because I asked a question? Could I have put it more politely? Ease up on the ad hominems, please.
You say “don’t generalize it as an American accent”, hinting perhaps they don’t all sound quite like that?
Was that the fail? He had a funny accent?
Just guessing. Still wondering what the fail is.
It was like the Goon Show. Unable to laugh because I never had a clue what they were saying…
That was the fail. Hardly anyone can understand what he's saying.And no…you don’t fail for asking a simple question. I don’t think anyone would argue that any nation just has one single accent, and I don’t believe that is what you were asking. Most nations have dialects and regional accents. This vid is a fail because the speaker is, as ninja said, is incomprehensible to those of us who DO have American accents.
*squeeze*
*reaches up and YOINK!-s the extra ‘is’*
Of course Dragon says it best.
*Bows*
Must refresh better.
Jeez, I’m late…I’ll stick my reply here as well.
GM, the surfer was speaking in jargon that was outrageously over-the-top. What you identified as an “accent” was, in fact, the fail. In light of this, I found your first comment quite humoro(u)s and had hoped you were making a deadpan delivery. I hope you can appreciate that now, too. Most people knew what you meant and did not take insult.
Thanks for these replies.
Quite apart from being lamely ignorant of most things North American (I’m from Australia), I really do find some American accents hard to understand. I assumed his was one of those.
I quite genuinely couldn’t understand a word this fellow said, and just presumed that was my fault.
Oh, and DW, yes, I DO know that a Texan, a New Yorker, a Valley Girl and someone from Alabama have different accents, due to various historical cultural influences. But as a foreigner, I’d pick some of them wrong in a double-blind test.
And one more thing, just as a matter of interest. I have noted above some confusingly derogatory references to “surfer culture” as if to imply surfers are stereotypically ignorant. That is a foreign concept to me. We have world champion surfers on the public speaking circuit over here…
*chuckle*
I’ve been known to ask for a translation from my Aussie friends as well.
Surfer talk actually reminds me of LOLspeak in that people who don’t understand it just think that it is gibberish – when really there is actual meanings behind the words. This guy’s video was over the top (obviously since it is on failBlog). Unfortunately lame is best used to describe stereotypes of people; if you are athletic you are dumb, if you are smart you are ugly – most of the time humans just are not that easy to categorize.
Where did my ‘returns’ go?
I think I am getting too tired.
I knew that you were the type of person to say that.
NOoooo. Don’t type-ify me. I like to think I am unique.
Someone say my name?
No. But can you say ‘unique New York’ outloud ,5 times, fast, and without messing up?
‘unique New York’ outloud ,5 times, fast, and without messing up?
There I said it. So there.
PbbbFFttt. Not impressed
Gorgon Medusa; Hello there. I’ve lived in America all of my life and I there are many accents that baffle me. Some speak so slow you want to reach down their throat and yank the words out. Others drop so many letters they should be ticketed for littering.
My manner of speech is perfect however.
The idiot surfer image is usually applied to the California type. A lot of stereotypes of idiots are Californian. Aussie and Hawaiian surfers seem to be looked upon as something else altogether.
No you do not fail because you asked a question. That was not an ad hominem attack. It was a statement remarking your statements assumption. Which was logically sound. You assumed it was an American accent, which shows/hints you may not have done any research into this theory. (I was jokingly putting it anyways hence the tongue out smily.) Yea so saying you have no sense of the world was just my knee jerk reaction since this is the second American bashing comment I have seen today. (Being Canadian myself has nothing to do with me wanting to stop the spread of ignorance via stereotypes). So I apologize if I offended you.
Not all Americans sound alike.
The fail was that he was talking about some random surfing jargon that no one has a clue about. They seemed to be doing a story on a storm and he was talking about how gnarly the waves were. First they cut to him mid sentence. Secondly the whole story about the storm was lost in a big question by the view consisting of a “Wha?”. Ergo the fail.
My remark was logically sound sorry that I did not specify.***
Hey, it’s okay. I don’t ever understand half of the jokes on the comment thread. But yes, the fail was he had a funny accent and his lack of coherent speech. Another reason is beacuse it is a classic stereotype called the “surfer dude.” He fit that explanation perfectly, being so informal on a news show. Of course, he probably got so excited he forgot to use action verbs, and went with general sounds.
So… He accidentied his interview?
Yep, the whole thing.
I think that sums it up quite nicely, Qwaz. I believe my work here is done. You are invited to see the regulars beat a dead horse up there if you like. It is not worth my effort to fight a losing battle. I believe guerilla tactics are best for this situation.
… Le sigh.
Are you French now or something?
Sad that you complain about having to fight my own battles but here you are trying to garner another failer to view what you have complained about. I was sighing about the irony.
Sadley, Getting all Ghillied up won’t work on here. They’ll find you.
I recommend guerrilla Tictacs.
I have a guerrilla tictactoe. I think it’s a fungal thing…
Dear DW,
The dreaded Tictactoe is horrible. I hope you win.
Love,
Jenny
XOXOXO
You get that from kicking ass.
Luckily, I have the remedy…
*XOXOXOXO*
Oh, and I am sooooooooooooooo tempted tonight…! I swear, I’m getting flashbacks to second grade.
*exes and ohs Jenny*
*ker-SMOOCH-ahs my most admirable Admiral*
Oh gee, are we supposed to feel bad or remorseful now? Because you can’t stand up for yourself? Guerilla tactics? Is that really the route you want to go? Really/
See what I mean? ^
Yes, that’s really the way I want to go. I really want to do that. Burn the forest if you like.
Music fails: http://awesomelybadlyrics.blogspot.com/
*Farts* Aw dude that was so oh dude was like baarrgghh! then it was so pitted like arrrghhh then my balls dropped and i was like marrrghh …… blargghhh
*throws a blanket over B_T and muffles the sound and smells*
Bad Teeth and gas?
You need a change of diet.
Gnarly man! It was all like kablaaaahhh!!!!
Gorgon Medusa – I hope you will come play again. I know you have been around for awhile and contribute some good lines when you feel like it. I think there was a lot of weirdness that got tangled into your thread tonight.
*wonders wherer you are from*
(I though Jenny was nice enough already)
answered several posts up above.
*Melbourne, Australia*
*no longer wonders*
What are you all doing here? Doesn’t anyone of you have a job? so pity.
It’s called cyber-slacking.
Part of the reason the world’s going to hell in a handcart.
lulz
Faux News, once again you entertain us with your fail. Keep it up! It makes our job easier.
Wow. So many lonely people. I just wanted to read comments about the video i watched, (That guy is barely alive) Instead, i get a page of people flaming each other for inane reasons. and now i feel sad cause i actually responded.
Hated your show, Patty.
Loved your Peppermint though.
At the risk of diluting my very fine and subtle joke, we have a similar product in Australia called the Nestle Mint Pattie. Gotta go buy one now.
You’re presumably too young to remember The Patty Duke Show?
I found that show hilarious. Of course at that age I found most things hilarious.
Now I want a mint.
There’s no earworm quite like the theme tune.
Oh, and I think I wanted to marry Patty back when I was eight.
Now here she is, posting on Failblog ^^.
We’ve turned that thread into a banana boat party. Come and join us. We have playdough, peanut butter fluff sandwiches and a game of kick ball going.
And Harry Belafonte
DAY OH!
do you think he is high or drunk?
This is ridiculously old…
You can hear the newscasters trying not to laugh.
I think it’s a surfer win. It must be a setup.
On the other hand, it looks like the wedge, maybe he hit his head too many times.
I hate surfers.
Is he acting? Where’s the fail?
did he die?
Was funny shit dude!
DUUUUUUUDEEEEEEEEE
Dumb but cute–a male bimbo.
As with the female variety, great fun for a tryst, completely unsuitable for a relationship, and a great annoyance to other members of the same sex.
I got stoned and I missed it
Shouldn’t you be at least on certain level of idiocy to be able to speak that way?
I am not sure as to why this is a fail, but having surfed most of my life probably skews this vision.
Full quote, for those who “couldn’t understand him.”
“It’s just like. Dude you get the best barrels ever. Dude, it’s just like, you pull in, and you just get spit right out of ‘em, then you just drop in and you just smack the lip, WHAPOW! Drop down, and snap, BWLAH! Drop in, ride the barrel and get pitted, so pitted, like that.”
Full translation
“It’s just like. Dude you get the best barrels ever.”
- Pretty self explanatory
“Dude, it’s just like, you pull in,”
- When you get barrelled when you surf, you “pull in” to the barrel by moving most of your weight on the back of the board, slowing yourself down. The lip of the waves throws over you, putting you in the hollow, open section.
“and you just get spit right out of ‘em,”
- There is a lot of water splashing around in the back of the barrel, called the foamball. This is where the barrel is collapsing on itself, and a lot of spray (tiny water particles in the air) can build up here. Once the barrel starts to completely collapse on itself, this spray is shot out of the barrel, much like a bullet from a gun. When you surf and are in the barrel, you get “spit out” right before the barrel collapses.
“then you just drop in and you just smack the lip, WHAPOW!”
- When you “drop in” is when you paddle into the wave and stand up on the face and do your bottom turn to set up your ride. The “lip” of the wave is the part that is about to throw over and make the barrel. When you “smack the lip” you ride up the face of the wave, and do a hack (sharp, violent turn), or another type of turn, on/at the lip. This causes a massive amounts of spry to be thrown from your board in an arc straight up into the air, and looks incredible if done correctly.
“Drop down, and snap, BWLAH!”
- This is where you pull into a wave, and once the section that barrels comes up, a snap is a small quick turn, that helps you lose substantial amounts of speed to get into the barrel. Snaps are used when you don’t have the time or space to slow down by moving your weight backwards on the board.
“Drop in, ride the barrel and get pitted, so pitted, like that.”
- To be pitted is to be barreled, shacked, in the green room, in the cathedral, etc.
I hope this helped anyone who was confused.
Thank you!
I’ll print that out and listen again.
It’s a fail because this is a news station airing a person who is speaking in a manner that most people (I say most not all) find it difficult to understand, or cannot understand, such as myself. In this case the VTR operator should have cut to something else, but then again since it is FOX they probably continued the interview because it was entertaining. I think if they would have had subtitles for his terms it would have been a win. Thank you for translating.
You see? There is always truth behind stereotypes.
yes..right…okay..go on….yes…
He is sexy as hell! lol but talks like a typical surfer it’s really cute! call me honey or come visit me down here in St.Thomas US Virgin Islands Ill show you some good surf!
I think he’s cute. But maybe I’m just used to surfer talk here in virginia beach. Maybe I hang at the beach too much.
Wow – this young man demonstrates the complete lack of intelligence that is ruining our country today. If he can not complete a sentence without “like” or “dude” – God help us if he reproduces and raises his child to be like him.
Must reach 1000 comments before it leaves the front page!
We did it, yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *pops Champagne*
How about a toast? *raises glass in air*
To A Fail Well Done, We Toast Ye!
*drains glass* YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is a win.
“JUST JUST JUST JUST DUDE JUST JUST JUST JUST BRA JUST JUST JUST JUST SO PITTED JUST JUST JUST JUST JUST JUST…….”
Publicly humiliated douchebag win.
I hope he ends up as a Darwin Award nominee, and his last recorded words will be, “Dude! Woah, bra!”
I recommend birth control. With a touch of darwinism to cleanse the gene pool…..
True, he is a moron, but I’d totally do him anyway.
I think this is the “I like turtles” kids father
Shotguns are suppose to be 100% reliable :O
Stereotype win.
You guys do realize he’s joking right? He’s being a stereotypical surfer on purpose. They aren’t even surfing they are skimboarding. So he can’t get “pitted”.
Sounds stoned!
This is what you get when Arnold cuts the education budget way more than he should be cutting
So the message is: Barrels are cool?
holy cow i went to high school with that guy..
his name is Micah Peasley
he hasn’t changed at all HAHAHAHA
drkavi trolovi jebem vam boga noliferskog
Nothing about this is a fail.
bwahahahahaha
You guys are idiots, you’re worse than the surfer they are interviewing.
If they are idiots, then ignore them.
whoooapa….an then.. bwuaaaaaaa..
your= possession
you’re = you are
Who are you talking to?
OMG, I can’t stop laughing! I don’t know what I’d do if I had to interview someone like that, my condolences to the videographer XD
He’s Hot!
Wow he just totally fit the “SURFS UP NARLEY DUDE” title
whay are my commetns not showing up morong
If you’ve ever surfed and just come out of the washing machine (or toilet bowl) you’d understand every word he said. Stand down dude until you try it.
No offense but I’m guessing it feels like being dizzy? It still wouldn’t make any sense
after a day of surfing, i always remember how to use actual words. so that’s no excuse.
Duuuude!
It’s not nice to make fun of retards XD
Or surfers.
Or surfers. Proof that saltwater is corrosive.
This video proves that some parents should not be allowed to reproduce
BEHOLD! Wuppaah then u get pitted and its like blaragaraghhhh, then u get those waves and its like ohahhohahaoh! btw jenny ur not nicer thn me ^^ Ragghhhraghh! *farts*
DO A BARREL ROLL
anyway fox11news always fail hard… (see also: internet haet macine)
You know what’s sad?
I live in Huntington Beach. I SWEAR WE’RE NOT ALL THIS STUPID.
I. HATE. YOU.
Today’s fail brought to you by ME.
Personally, I view this as a win.
First!
he was probably up in the f-ing ozone layer
taste meh lazer – ShwoopDaWhoop
giev teh epics lol!!!11one
Everything above…
WhooooOoOoOoOOAaaaAaaaAAaaaahhh!
I love the way news casters always manage to find the most intelligent person available to interview.
lol. I don’t know what the bigger fail is…the fact it’s a news report on a pretty bad flood which then goes to the interview or the interview itself. Both are pretty funny though
Excellent, simply excellent!
LAST!
you people have WAY too much time on your hands
And you thought surfers were complete morons.
Ladies and Gentlemen, May I present your next President of the United States.
people only think this guy is a Fail because he’s hot!
To anyone who thinks this guy is for real: turn on CNN, quick. Borat is interviewing the legendary English rock band, Spinal Tap. Their drummer exploded again.
WAPOW
lolz duuude
WIN!
i think he just like dude ha a bwaaaaaah hard just crash…… dude
Probably drunk
wapushhhh!
awesome dude!
is he talking about surfing?
where does all the obvious drug use come into play?