Hours of Operation Fail
Picture by: whit_gardner. Submitted by: whit_gardner via Fail Uploader
Click to see G-Rated Pics and Movies Only
« Previous Contractor Fail | Success Fail Next »
» 335 Failures in Communication
-
Recent Comments
Mouse on The U is silent Gonzo on The U is silent white_rotten_rabbit on Parenting Fail Spirals on You don’t say Rose on Sober Fail Loki on Sober Fail Rose on Tell Me What You See Hannes on Entrance Fail Patrick on The U is silent Aja on The U is silent 
Cheezburger Network Blog
i looooooove it
*dreading this earworm’s durability*
.
*squeeze*
is it always on your mind, girl?
.
Shh, its a crunch we are talking about!
Why doesn´t my Grav Avatar show?
Ah nevermind, it just took some time.
refreshments anyone?
*offers Jesus-shaped cookies*
Woo! Cookies!
*bites Jesus´s legs off*
don’t make HIM cross!
He’ll be hopping mad and crucify you?
And he’ll fall in the Dead Sea and we’ll call him Bob.
Bo-ob! Bo-ob! Bo-ob! Thy are our saviour, and thou shall lead us to Camorra!
Abstract – no legs – bobs in water – BOB!
BYOBuoy
*Checks story ark*
Hope floats.
@Judy ahhh, i sea!
Fish!
Um, fuzzy honey…watch that username…
What’s the HTML code for changing font type & size?
failblog hot tamale code don’t play that
I tried that but I’m not sure I’m reading it correctly. It looks like you’re using “pre” and then “/pre”. Is that right?
Relly I down’t know why if the “8 day” I am working? and the sunday? what do?
Yes..
No! Al relly down’t know why if what do? Working?! Who know?
Damn Mexicans in Mexico
I can only sigh and pretend not to be upset when you people mock my people. We don’t run around saying “Damn Americans in America.”…..
Racism starts with such comments.
Damn idiots in Atlantis!
(To reach Atlantis, please dive into the sea. Now hold your breath while you dive in deeper. That’s it, just a little more… you almost got it… never mind the blood pumping in your head and that pain in your chest, you’ll be there soon! Good idiot…)
Guess you have a nickname FAIL. Maybe Freaky… but rather Dickie.
You should probably be blaming the Catholics in Catholicistan
Anyone buying The Beatles: Rock Band?
closed for praying!
let us prey
Prey on the week, Granny?
….and innocent Judy *squeeze*
Innocent? Moi?
I’ve been doing something wrong, then.
maybe you’re doing it all so right, so how could it be wrong?
♫ If loving you is wrong, I don’t wanna be right. ♪
*plays drums*
*cue the Beatles*
you so cue …
*lines up the beetles and makes them wait all patient like*
What are they queuing for?
*bugs out*
*music plays*
*suddenly, the beetles start doing the boot-scootin’ boogie*
* And then bee the star-cong with boots scootering around mookie*
Dont worry, it is not even supposed to make any sense.
Did you get over your virus, Brewski?
No.
Docs don’t know what it is.
I’m getting discouraged.
*gentle squeeze*
I’m sorry you’re not feeling well!
*shakes fist at China*
*squeeze*
Thanks.
You know, that sounds a lot like something my friend got – it ended up being a colony of some form of protozoa living in her gut… hard to test for, and the treatment wasn’t pleasant. I hope that’s not what you’ve got.
*Squeeze*
Way to cheer him up there, Bearly!
Well, it’s better than the research I’ve been doing. I don’t think it’s cholera, Hepatitis B, typhoid, or paratyphoid!
*thinks it’s time to change the subject*
That’s what I’m here for!
So, umm…
Do you like… bread?
Yeah, bread! Sourdough – man, that’s the stuff, huh?
I tell ya I am all about me some sourdough.
Soft pretzel bread! With just a touch of mustard butter to spread on it…… mmmmmmmm!
Your sourdough has nothing on my ciabatta!
Ciabatta get out of here if you think you can beat (sesa)me.
I’ve got a french loaf! ByeIlove you.
And on the ninth day, God rested.
And on Caturday, he went golfing.
On Blernsday he goes to see the NNY Mets.
what’s the day on the 8thday of the week?
cues day afternoon
Afternoon delight?
You know, Monday – one day, Tuesday – two day, Wednesday – what? Thursday – three day… wait…
Mary?
Catholicism.
open 8 days? bit of a slapper I say
Jesus wins.
fatality
reincarnality in the flesh
*makes Judy see stars*
Stars are just holes in a wooden bowl, you should know that!
believe me, I know
nice.
And I proclaim the Eighth Day to be Naked Day.
And there was much rejoicing and nudity.
*worships*
But every day is naked day!
*Streaks through the fail*
*worships harder*
*takes pictures*
What about the ninth day? Since it’s 8 days open and 1 closed, there must be 9 days!
maybe they’re German and das Nein extra days ya?
“das nein extra days ya” ?
I can assure you, even germans can count.
Well, most of us, that is.
Okay, some, perhaps.
At least.. naw, nevermind.
Why don’t you take a count?
Dude, it does mein Herz gut …
to see your bug hasn’t got you down for the count.
.
Hang in there, bro’ski.
*squeeze*
Brewski ;
I lost count! How many days are in the month now?
mhh… lets say a month has 4 weeks.. so a month has about 36 days?.. but february has only 34, u know.
Forty days has September,
April, June and November.
All the rest have sixty-one,
except February, cuz somebody
f***ed it all up.
Let’s see… 4 months have 40 days, one month has 34, and 16 months have 61. Total: 155.
That’s more than half.
*squeeze*
February is International Fail Month.
February 1st is International Day Of The Sock.
woo hoo!
*hides in Moomin’s sock drawer*
Sock it to me!
*squeeze*
*puts a sock in it*
Look here!!! It’s only been in there 7 days, but it smells more like 9
*points*
I won’t tell you where I was wearing it.
*hides*
hahahahaha!
*seeksqueeze!*
Wait until mid March Judy, then we’ll stick it to him.
Cool. It’s a plan.
*high fives Marius*
^5
Glad to see you can release your inner Brute Judy.
They accidentied February?
Every year, Qwaz. Don’t know when they’ll be able to get it right.
Someone needs to give them a stern talkin to.
What’s the difference between oral and anal?
its kinda obvious but what?
oral can make your day
anal makes your hole weak
OMG worst joke ever! Love it!
Thanks Fluffy!
*squeeze!*
I have worse hee hee
Do tell!
Granny? Blushing???
That surely is one of the signs of the apocalypse.
its really really bad, not sure about putting it on this site
Post it on aiki’s message board!
Where’s that?
dubya dubya dubya aikiwaza42 dot net
hmmmm, looks a bit serious.
ok then, here goes (disclaimer: this is not a reflection on me or my beliefs or activities)
what do you do after raping a blind, deaf and dumb girl?break her fingers so she can’t tellNow would be an appropriate time for you to blush.
Two priests side by side in a public bathroom.
One looks over and sees the other has a Nicoderm patch on his member. “Father you’re suppose to put that on your upper arm”
“It’s working fine where it is. I’m down to two butts a day”
But hey, she can still speak! Or, will she go into coma from pain?
*cough*dumbmeansmute*cough*
*Hands Lurk an orange lozenge*
@ mawcrow, he said she was dumb….. not dumb as in stupid, but dumb ad in mute…she cannot speak.
I’ll bet she sure played a mean pinball… That is until you broke her fingers.
Who we talking about
Oh no it makes sense. the christan calendar has 9 day in a week. theres Monday, Tuesday, Jewsday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday and God’s Supercool Funday.
So they’re open on God’s Supercool Funday, right? Just want to be sure, because that’s the day I was going to go.
I think they’re closed that day, that’s what makes it supercool funday because you don’t have to worry about getting punished by Jebus
♪ It’s just another supercool funday
My I don’t wanna run day
That’s my fun day
Just another supercool funday! ♫
The sign says they’re closed on Sunday .. so if they’re open the other 8 days of the week, they must be open on Supercool Funday…. amirite?
punished? i thought that jesus was supposed to take away peoples’ punishment. wasn’t that the point of the crucifixion?
You attempt to apply logic to religion?
*puts mini forceps down*
*turns game off*
*pouts*
The fail name lied.
I was looking forward to removing the funny bone.
OooOOOoooh! We can still do that, k@! I get to pull out the liver!!!
*tips game board over, grabs internal organs that fall out*
*flees*
*BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP*
Judy! You cheater!
All is allowed in love and surgical operations!
*makes a wish*
Oy! My bone!
*nomnomnom*
Hmmm? EEEEEEEEKKKK!!!!!
*BZZZZZZZZTTT*
how do i change my picture? Why does everyone has such a cool picture but i dont? -.-
http(colon)//en.gravatar.com/
thanks man. (:
You can change your name on failblog, only the email address has to match your gravatar account.
*test*
Yeay! Works! =D
Religious people always try to speak trough nonsenses
Nonsenses unto thee
*weeps for weeeee*
*rejoices on the 9th day*
glossolalia … you got me on my knees
First you get down on your knees,
Fiddle with your rosaries,
Bow your head with great respect,
And genuflect, genuflect, genuflect!
(Tom Lehrer, anyone?)
Get in line in that processional
Step into that small confessional
Where the guy who’s got religion’ll
Tell you if your sin’s Original
Yeah, my dad got thrown out of a talent show at his private Catholic school’s talent show for playing that with his band.
I ache for the touch of your lips, dear
but much more for the touch of your whips, dear
OMG we got a believer!
*rushes fuzz to the church*
I hope we make it in time!
Granny was out to get to me (extra “ya ya ya ya’s”)
That’s the way it seems (all the day and all of the night)
Dirty jokes haunted (how did the Kinky’s get in here?)
All my dreams.
It has to be 9 days a week because it is open for 8 days and is closed on Sunday. So what do you think the other 2 days are called? Give me some suggestions.
I like God’s Supercool Funday! ^^^
Nice lol.
Got any more?
Then theres Jewsday, i heard. Its before wednesday.But i would say its cowday.
I got one, how about Fresday, its the day between thursday and Friday.
NewSunday Extreme.
Today
The Other Day
Well, thats a god one! (pun intented)
*squeezes the moomin*
Squeezeday?
*squeeze*
I like that day!
*squeeeeeeeeze*
EVERY day is squeeze day in Fail Land!
*squeezes*
shamwowday.
k@, I think shamwow moments just happen on squeeze days. Usually, if one is squeezed too hard after mexican food or a lot of beer….
It only happened once!
*sobs*
*hugs Ms B – gently*
Yay! Squeese!
*starts looking for passport*
Fail Land, here i come!
Not sure if Crunch would accept…
How dare you speak to me of The Crunch! You know nothing of The Crunch. You’ve never even been to The Crunch.
(Sorry, I didn’t get your reference, is it Cap’n Crunch?)
nope, just a pun.
(who is Cap’n Crunch?)
The guy with the blue hat and white mustache and he is a mascot for the Cap’n Crunch line for cereal.
Oddly enough, his eyes are actually ON his hat, and not his head.
A breakfast cereal. I was baffled as to why a cereal would object to people squeezing?
*giggles inanely*
I love his crunchberries.
Just sayin’.
Yummmmm…crunchberries….
Those are my favorites.
*wonders if A.,Zombie likes teh Cranberries*
*shakes fist at fuzz for the nasty earworm*
*plugs ears*
*runs from the room*
LALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALA!!!!!!!!!
Hey, it could be worse. Pinball Wizard has infected my ears since granny’s ultimately tasteless joke.
You ain’t got no distractions?
Zombie Apocalypse.
Newmonday (the 9th day).
Yesterday and tomorrow.
Latter Day?
Red Letter Day?
Red Letters… Oh Moomin! My fellow red brother! Marx! Was! A! Wise! Man! (but náive…)
Ooh, Doomsday. Everyone has to play online Doom.
Maybe Taco night hsa grown into a whole day of it’s own?
I would go for that.
Naked spa day!
Naked spa day with tacos!
Mmmm, tacos de lengua!
Fuzz’s tongue on a taco? They’re all yours, sweetie!
oh my…
Or even free limosday
What about money day?
double… no wait… tripple fail!
Yeah… Not open on sunday, aand nine days. Wait… That makes two…
If this is a church, there are three fails. Go catch ‘em!
it’s probably not a church… it looks like it could be a bookstore. catholic churches are open every day.
don’t you mean “trippple”?
Wait, what?
I did mean triple though
Yes.
Correct, *Squeeze*
I’m feeling selfless. What do I do?
Do tetramastigotes flagellate?
Res ipsa loquitor!
empty your cache of attachments
euglena out all self-delusion
and the suchness of sweet-no-things speaks for itself
^ 4) Prophet.
Does that make 3) Salvation?
Let us all start another long random coversation to comemerate the 2 new days.
So plz think of something.
Covert memes?
actually according to this sign, there are 9 days a week. Sunday-closed, Monday-open, Tuesday-open, Wednesday-open, Thursday-open, Friday-open, Saturday-open, Isisday-open, and Venusday-open….
I like the made-up days better.
ok, then go make them up…? what are you talking about?
oh, nevermind, i think i read that wrong….
sorry
Hold on a minute! I recognise this photo! It’s near where I live on the Dharziaz Plane, where there are 9 days in a week, so not a fail.
waa-it a minute…
Waa-it a minute… what?
That was three minutes, you missed it. It was so good too. I could hardly breathe I laughed so hard.
Particularly the first 30 seconds.
I know, I had to go change my underpants after that.
as long as a long lost cousin?
It’s a Beatles reference people. RTFM.
you may wish to RTFComments, cootie
Circle circle dot dot.
If my anorak is yellow and my boots are orange, will my kitchen clash with a second saucepan, or should I set fire to a tiny scarecrow to prevent the common cold virus from incrementing the number of lamps trying to cover the world in darkness?
Probably Ixia Viridiflora.
42.
Correct!
(You have a pretty avatar!)
Maybe it’s open Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Caturday, and Bunday!
*stares at Rainbow avatar*
*eyes glaze over*
*falls into trance*
*feels self falling, deeper, deeper*
COMMAND ME, OH MASTER.…. you will put your pants back on… you will wear pants every day…. you will not remember dropping your pants… and you will make fluffy a yummy sandwich every day….
YES MASTER.*grills spinach, roasted red pepper, fresh mozarella, and prosciutto panini, brushed lightly with extra-virgin olive oil*
*hands to fluffy*
*wears 70’s vintage disco pants with red stripes*
oh, go look at the rainbow avatar again, i woult like one of those sandwiches as well, please.
Woot!
Oh shoot. That backfired. Now I really want that sandwich.
Stupid gas leak…
*grumble grumble*
What kind of gas?
At least we think it’s a leak. Hangin’ outside waiting for the stupid gas company to show up and tell us what’s going on.
Sucks, are you on propane?
To be honest…I don’t know. I guess they plugged the leak though, so dragons are welcome again.
Don’t anybody light a match!!!
Somebody please tell Dragonwriter to stay home until this is fixed.
Keep Dragon at least 40 feet away .
Anybody have any WARNING: NO DRAGONS signs???
Sorry! All I have is a Dragon CROSSING sign!
*puts up sign*
Just in case…
Hello? Test, test.
.tset ,tseT ?olleH
˙ʇsǝʇ `ʇsǝʇ ¿ollǝɥ
O.O
Didn’t work… How do u do those smileys? Sorry, I’m a bit new.
Click my name.
Right, thanks.
˙pɐq ooʇ puıɯ ɹnoʎ ʍolq ʇ,upıp ʇɐɥʇ ǝdoɥ o˙o
let’s see
o.o
slow up/down!
you’re test-firing-gun too fast!
*Slows up*
*uʍop sʍols*
ƃnıwols ʎzɐrɔ
* 11oɹ 1ǝɹɹɐq dıɹb ɥʇo1s ɐ sǝop *
*snork*
Picture taken from Neuvo Laredo Cantina in Atlanta, Georgia.
http://www.nuevolaredocantina.com/
This is the best place in Atlanta.
Second that…had lunch there today!
Were they counting caturday?
Faturday
OK, if here is 9 days in a week , then i’m missing 2 names. maybe farnsday and failday?
WINdsday
Im waiting already for next fail…
this one is a double
*makes note*
The doublers are on the list now?
That’ll make the list twice as long! 0.0
Did i do double?
It was an accident! *sob sob* It was cause of an typo!
Hey is better make you sales online
What???
*Refresh* Dammit!
*Refresh* Dammit!
*Refresh*… wait…. DAMMIT!
it is a DOuble fail!
What is the link Qwaz?
It’s August 4th already? ZOMGBBQ what days did I miss?
*Jumps in corner, grabs knees and rocks back and forth*
Hey guys, is there a secret day that I wasn’t aware of? or maybe two?
Awwww, man, damn Gravatar account not letting me keep Katt… I need a hug now!
Double Fail, surely
The 9 day week is here.
hehe, oh, i get it
8 days a week like the beatles song
–
ohh, i need your love babe
yes you know it’s true
hope you need my love babe
just like i need you
hold me, love me
hold me, love me
i ain’t got nothin’ but love, babe
eight days a week!
Beatles WIN! Operation FAIL!
*sings Beatles song*
That is not a fail, that is a double fail. lol.
On the first day, God said “Let there be light”.
On the second day, God separated the clouds from the oceans.
On the third day, God created the land out of the oceans.
On the fourth day, God separated light from dark to make days.
On the fifth day, God created sea and sky creatures.
On the sixth day, God created land creatures, and man.
On the seventh day, God took out the trash and mowed the lawn.
On the eighth day, God had some whiskey over poker with his buddies
On the ninth day, God rested because of his massive hangover.
Wow, double fail
nice site, keep blogging bro…
may i bokmrk this site!
GBU
OMG! I know where this resteraunt is! It’s a mexican resteraunt in Atlanta (Buckhead area) called Nuevo Laredo! I eat there every Saturday, and it’s packed.
And on the eighth day, he double-checked his calendar.
And on the Ninth day, God rested and claimed overtime for Day Eight
it’s a double fail! there are 7 days in a week. and that they are closed on sundays…
double fail (8 days a week)
double fail
EPIC FAIL!
Their logic went to hell.
i ate there like 3 days ago…
you guys are all dumbasses. the sign is a JOKE. Nuevo laredo cantina has that sign up outside their front door in atlanta, georgia.
this isn’t a fail because they did it ON PURPOSE.
in spanish culture they refer to a week as having eight days, includding the day they are in.
Yep, it’s a joke…not a FAIL. They also have a “Free Beer Tomorrow” sign. Alas tomorrow never comes…
And yep, the food is great!
Double fail
thats a double fail
In soviet russia they have 3 mondays.
goes to show how smart christians are
More like calculating fail.
rofl this is my favourite!
Funny thing about this is, it is Mexican custom to say, “Te veo en ocho dias (I will see you in eight days)” as a way of saying see you next week same day. As for the closed Sunday, that is just funny.