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Cheezburger Network Blog
Is it right to say his car was rear-ended?
lol … I’m not sure there’s anything right about this one
You deserve a break today.
hee … as in broke back break dancin specialist mountin’?
Broke back mountin’ car.
Whoa, I don’t know what you were doing trying to mount a car, but you should see a chiropractor about that back. (Do zombies see chiropractors?)
Nah, we just roll with it. The body is just a vehicle.
Huh, I guess I can’t fault you for just rambling down the road.
*feels bored*
*has idea!*
TOFU NO!! GET OFF THAT CAR!!!
*gets video camera ready*
Now we’ve got to wash the car, AGAIN!
And now, we are proud to bring you the EAR WORM OF THE DAY:
♫ Workin’ at the car wash!
Workin’ at the car wash, yeah!!
Come on y’all and sing it for me!
Car wash! ♪
*singing* WOAH, WOAH, WOAH, WOAH! CAR WASH YEAH!!
broke back mountin part two “Getting a piece of glass”.
That’s right. What would you like me to break?
A piece of this kit-kat.
*hands Lurk a kit-kat*
Snatches lil’ kittie back from Lurk’s hands!
THAT would be cruel to break a piece off of a living kitten!
*smothers kitten first*
Here Lurk!
Bob, when the lolcats come for you I’m just going to stand back and watch. You asked for it….
I know, right? Do you think that maybe someone should go and alert our cat friends?
*trying to stir trouble since Skwerlly violated us*
I forgotted that them guys can climb trees
as well!!
*bolts front door shut* *nails widows closed* *drinks beer*
BUTJimbo was going to let Lurk ♀ Break the Kittie Kat apart while it was stillALIVE!I was being “HUMANE” or “SKWERLANE” or somethin’ !!!!!
I know you’re in there. I can smell your fear.
*focuses laser eyes on Bob’s door*
Don’t make me use these. Your neighbors might ask embarrassing questions.
A lolcat has come for Bob. Please stand back…
*dons protective helmet and body armo(u)r*
*hides in bunker*
Thank gawd.
*narrows her eyes at Skwerlly Bob*
YOU RESUSCITATE THAT KITTEN THIS INSTANT, YOUNG
MANRODENT!!!1!!!!!one!!!!*sitting at the bleachers and applauding*
Get him!!!!
*sitting at bleachers and applauding*
FINISH HIM!
*wishes she could invite more cheezpeeps*
You called, Madam?
Unpossible! Kittys are *unbreakable*!
What is unposs…
*starts twitching*
I’m not really sure whether to smile or not..
I would. It’s not my car.
Even if it was you’d still laugh when you saw this!
Yes… it’s a Renault…. There are good cars and there are French…
don’t care about animations
First?
nope.
thats my job.
I have probably died of beatenwithboardswithnailsinthemitis.
*yawn* … i can only go with the bored part
*snork*
*spork*
*torque*
Mork and Mindy….
…Pork and beans?
Bjork & Cindi (Lauper)
cork & screw (lavender blue)
*hork*
Orc (prince of Whles)
*dork*
PFFFFTTTT!!!!
*plugs the clone’s leak*
*admires duct tape work*
*takes & munches clone’s cookies*
*wanders off hoping Leila is pleased*
But, but, butt, you were enjoying it so much…
…I felt very encouraged, (and touched).
Be that as it may, you must always ask permission first. Silly Skwerlly!!!
Uhm…. May I?
*having asked first, (as admonished), touches Leila & her Clone*
*wanders away thinking
We didn’t agree. I think you should wait to hear the answer first.
Ooooooh! You didn’t say that was part of the rules.
SORRY Leila! SORRY Leila’s Clone! 
NOW?
Yes now.
AND the valve is on my RIGHT shoulder.
*giggles*
*closes door behind himself*
*cookies munching & giggles*
That HAD to hurt!
The car, or the guy?
Yes.
Which one?
Both.
Yes.
Hell, no!
We won’t go!
Do you watch Simpsons?
DUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A) Sandwhich
b: Witch Won (she hexed him)
[#3] Uhm?
Profit
I thought safety was third.
Uhm?
safety is always third!
I learned that at FailBlog.
See?! The interwebs can be quite educational!
i love ejamacation!!!!
I don’t even want to say what word I saw when I read this the first time.
Bet I can guess, tho.
Well, I like that too…as long as it’s done properly!
DUCK!!!
But soft, what jack through wonder car window breaks one off?
I yonder that as well
you have a dirty mind… for shame.
He seemed unfazed by it
A guy that size is probably used to breaking things.
faked, weak. real breakage but the fall was controlled and forced. no fail.
agreed. It is prop glass that breaks like that.
TIMBER?
TEMPER?
TUMBLER?
THUMPER?
HUMPER?:twisted:
*sigh* damn
*Goes back to combo*
BUMPER?
DUMPER!
I don’t want to have to do it. Can I hire someone?
SLUMPER!
PIE!
… I mean…. Piemper!…. I think……
Probably not, if the glass had been actually
tempered, it might not have broken so readily.
Most auto glass these days are tempered, allowing them to shatter into thousands of small pieces instead of a few dagger sized shards. The glass in this fail is no different, notice how it explodes into thousands of pieces even where he doesn’t touch it.
.
It’s part of the reason why people like the putz in this fail keep appearing in fails – they never learn because they never get seriously hurt.
So for the betterment of the homosapiens sapiens species, we should use glass that shatters into deadly razor-sharp shards?
Eeeep!
Where’s that bunker, Brewski?
Dunno ’bout the bunker, but my tempered glass shower stall door shattered right behind me as I was brushing my teeth once. Loudest sound I’ve ever heard, and it kept going as the chunks of glass kept cascading down into the bathtub.
Amazing.
I would have probably been so startled my toothbrush would have ended up jabbed into my throat!
After prying the toothbrush out of the back of my throat, I would have to change my shorts.
.
WN, it did this all by itself? No one fell through it or anything? That’s flat out freaky …
*hears Twilight Zone theme playing in his head*
this homo is not so sapiens…
First to rate methinks
third to rate!
not second! wait… i am second… anyways this scrores about a five on the funny scale.
F***ing 10th, really? Damn you guys are quick!
Try and explain that to your insurance agent.
It probably falls under “idiot brother” damage.
I suppose technically you could say:
“Some ass damaged my car.”
that’s some fancy ass’splainin’ right there
So are you going to ass’ist me in my claim or not?
I should probably butt out actually. You committing insurance fraud is none of my busin’ass.
What fraud? Can’t you see the back window is assploded all over the back seat?
Butt his little asscapade’s gonna make his rates asscalate asstronomically; there’s no asscaping it.
.
(And asscargo’s, his is prolly now like a snail.)
Can you assure me of this?
I hate assuming that people are always correct without assking for an assplanation.
…which isn’t covered.
Hopefully the insurance company won’t see the video.
I don’t think he’s included in the rider clause.
He could be, in the hold harmless clause.
Ì hope insurance pays for that
The insurance report on that must have been amusing. I hope it was his car and not a complete stranger’s!
I believe it was a Hurtz rental car.
I guess he’ll have to try harder next time.
…and rent from Avis instead.
That car was not a Benz. It was a Breaks.
It’s all Bent(ley) outta shape now.
It definitely wasn’t Smart.
*POUNCES Brewski and Rolls(Royce) with him on the ground*
*oof!*
Oh MY Leila! It looks like your high beams are on!
I can see your signals!
*hits the dimmer switch*
*puts stick into “Drive” position*
Beeeeeeeeeeeep!!
Whoops, sorry Leila, this isn’t equipped with proper safety equipment. Besides, it wouldn’t be proper of me to handle these curves.
*takes the first exit*
Careful brew, it looks like leila is strapped on, I mean in.
*snork!*
One of my co-workers is named Royce. The picture in my head when I read this made me
*squeeze!*
*squeezesmooch*
*smoochsqueeze*
Seriously, who didn’t see this coming within about five seconds of the video starting?
I honestly thought his arms would buckle under his massive weight and fall to the ground face first.
The look on his face as he sits there in the window is HYSTERICAL! It’s that “wait- what just happened?” expression.
I don’t think he had a clue what had happened.
Imbecille!!!
As soon as I saw his first attempt I said, “he’s gonna try it again, and he’s going through that back window when he does.” Why a handstand on the trunk lid of a car anyways?
I was actually thinking he was going to face-plant into the trunk. I think, Jimbo, you had a hint of what was to come, this being FailBlog and such…
Because it’s there.
*snork*
I thought Jimbo’s
was rhetorical.
I did have a good strong hint, being on failblog. If I could ask him why he thought this was cool, I would, in a snide and sarcastic manner.
Might have been, but then it was sort of a rhetorical answer as well.
I’ve asked guys the “WHY??” question before. The answer is pretty much always the same.
“…Because it’s COOL!!!”
(I do not think this word means what they think it means.)
Inconceivable!
Hey, Ms B! Sorry to hear about your strip, er, strep infection. How’s your porcelain turned lobster bisque skin?
Thanks, Admiral. The funny thing about the painful burn, I forgot about it completely when the aches kicked in. This has not been a good week for me…
I checked on it this morning though, and it’s starting to peel. So, we’ve reached the itchy stage. Fun!
My translation: “Too much testosterone.”
You’re just jealous because you’ve never tried to crush a beer can on your forehead!
Graaaah!
*Attempts a beer crush, fails*
Owwie! Anyone got a Band-Aid?
Wow, looks like you Schlitz your forehead right open! Here ya go, Bud!
*hands Band-Aid*
I think he needs more than a Band-Aid. I think he needs a Pabst smear.
Hold still, Qwaz…this won’t hurt a bit…
*grabs terrifying-looking metal contraption, a monster-huge swab and a cold one and moves towards Qwaz*
Ooh, the little mermaid!
This malt heal up nicely.
You’re correct, Brewski — I’ve never tried such a stunt.
*pins a (Pabst) blue ribbon onto Brewski’s shirt*
*suddenly feels better*
*Runs using all the energy he’s bottled up*
Not so fast…you need Corona-ry bypass surgery.
We’re really Fostersing a healing environment, aren’t we?
*summons Red Stripe nurse*
*shines Natural Lite on the subject*
I’m at your Becks and call, doctor!
*looks at Qwaz’s head*
Guinness gracious, he looks terrible!
We’ve got a Hoegaarden full of medicinal herbs, too.
*hops to see what the big commotion is about*
What a dumb (fat) shit!!!!
Is that your gut reaction?
In hiney sight…yes.
Well, your reaction is justified considering his assinine behavior.
You could say he put his back into it.
He certainly pulled his own weight.
He cracked the window open.
…And now is the butt of all our jokes.
I really can’t get behind this kind of behavio(u)r.
Would this be classified as arse-on?
Hah! Dämned backseat drivers!
He was bringing up the rear.
He is tacky and lacks glass if you ask me.
I didn’t know you svelte so strongly about it Leila.
Ms B would tell you, it’s a pain in the butt!
♫ We can dance if we want to
We can leave your friend’s behind … in the safety glass ♫
I was just thinking the same thing L-C! Hahhaha
wow…
So after filming this, thinking to himself, wow I bet if i put this on the interwebs ill be famous!
-1 for inconsistency.
Awwww, that’s what happened to my girlfriend when I tried that on her.. but it wasn’t a backflip.
Did you pay for it?
she did
LOL
He’s just paying the resulting child support for 18 years
HA! Poor mittens never saw it coming.
oh snap
where’s one of those fake beards at when you need one. You know?
Are you ok? You’re sure? Good! You’re buying me a new back window. Will that be cash, check, or charge?
That would be…hey look it’s a flying Tom Cruise
*runs while Lurk is distracted*
*ducks*
*sees Tech running away*
Aw, man! I fall for that every time!
You’ll never catch me sucker.
*catches up to tech, tackles him to the ground*
*sits on him while Lurk gets to him*
Is this yours Lurk?
Usually I wouldn’t mind a beauiful gal sitting on me but curse you Leila. Wait you’re her clone? Leila would never do this to the awesome technicolor right?
Yeah. She would. Now hold still.
Where is that Lurk?
Well…no sense in holding you down technicolor. I guess you can just go about your business.
*pokes limp technicolor*
Uhh, Leila, I think maybe you went a little overboard on that tackle….
*Also pokes technicolor*
Hmm…
*Checks wallet*
…Nothing.
*Puts wallet back, walks away*
“Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead. There’s a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. With all dead, well, with all dead there’s usually only one thing you can do.”
“What’s that?”
“Go through his clothes and look for loose change.”
“Bring out your DEAD….Bring out your DEAD.”
*watches Jimbo go through mostly-dead Tech’s pockets*
Is there enough there to buy me a new back window?
*holds up intergalactic diners club card*
This should cover it.
(I think that was the name of the credit card Ford Prefect stole in HGttG)
I didn’t know that american rear glass was so easy to break !
Generally, laminated glass is only used for the windshield. This is the case in most countries.
All auto glass is tempered and difficult to break.
Auto glass is very difficult to break, under some circumstances. I’ve seen a guy take a full swing with a fire ax and watched it bounce off. Then again, I’ve seen a fireman break a car window with his key chain. That guy is probably 200 pounds, that should be plenty on top of a back window.
It’s funny, I once cracked my windshield by tossing my keys on the dashboard (an unlucky hit). I was angry before I did it and seeing the crack didn’t help my attitude much.
Was the temp outside wildly different from the temp inside? In any case, I didn’t know zombies drove cars….
They have to drive cars. Public transportation may deny them access… and walking would be a drag with body parts falling off at random intervals.
Speaking of the temperature difference, my own FML story happened a couple months ago on one of the first sunny, hot (but not as hot as it gets down here in July/August!) days of the year. I finally decided to wash all the pollen off my car. Proud of myself, I turned the hose on to rinse the car first. I hear a THUNK. Huge freaking crack down the front of the windshield. Because I washed my car.
That’ll teach ya! It’s nature’s way of telling you to relax on a lawn chair with a cold drink, instead of slaving over a hot car.
*bearlysqueeze*
Nope, virtually the same temp Jimbo. It was an unlucky hit, I had a metal Alpine key tag attached and it wedged itself with it’s bottom edge on the end of the dashboard padding and the top corner on the windshield. I was amazed it cracked, it was a one in a million toss of the keys onto the dash.
That said, thanks Bearly for scaring me out of washing my truck anytime soon.
Hey ZA, you should come join us on the new fail. It’s thatta way —–>
Yes, but there is a difference between tempered glass and laminated glass. Have you seen that video of guy trying to headbutt his way through the windshield, and it won’t break? That’s what laminated glass does. Tempered glass will still shatter when hit hard enough.
You actually have to cut laminated glass to remove it. In fire school they taught us how to remove a windshield with an axe. You cut all along the edge until you can fold it up onto the roof of the car.
You went to school to learn to start fires??? I had to teach myself.
*flicks bic*
*flicks bic*
*gazes longingly at flame*
Nope, I went to school to learn WHO started fires, and to learn how to control bleeding when some idiot goes through his back window….
Bic, what a great company. They make the pens that keep you in school and the lighters that take you out.
What? Americans are easy?
Earth girls are easy.
I love that movie!
Adds movie to Netflix.
oh, Geoff Goldbloom is so friggin hot in that!!! It’s one of my favorite movies of all time. I own it….
You have liplock for
WiplocMac?LOLZ!
That’s a Japanese car I believe.
Not American.
SPLASH CRASH MASH KERBLASH.
ASHES, ASHES, SOMEBODY’S FALLEN ON THEIR A$$ESTS
Well, the window’s broken, so I might as well relax here for a bit…
He was laying back thinking “Damn I did a great job”
He is resting on his laurels.
Glass laurels?
He could hardy believe it.
If you wanna be a femme fatale, you can’t rest on your L’Oréals.
Why here Cloral? are you saying you had something to do with it ?
Yeah, that was my car.
Well you have a nice pieces of ride.
Thanks to the invention of You Tube, the world has really gotten to see the extent of idiocracy in the world. Hospitals and other businesses thank you.
I think you mean “idiocy” (as in “extremely foolish behavior”), as opposed to “idiocracy” (as in “ruled by idiots”). Just because internet video has served to spotlight the idiots of the world, it doesn’t mean that the idiots are ruling the world (at least, not just yet, lol)–it only means that there are a lot of them.
Actually, on reflection, probably both are true. The world IS ruled by idiots.
Did he die?
…I thought that would be more fun. :/
Thank you Mr. of my existence.
I was looking forward to some confetti throwing and some champagne. FB ruined it by using someone I don’t know in the Powered By.
Anyone know Cyn?
nope *throws confetti anyway* I can’t see the fail of the powered by because of my work filter, can you please help me out?
*or, not of
Ummm…. really?
what?
Never mind, I was looking at the wrong “of”! Apparently I need more caffeine as well!
lol *hands Avis nice steaming espresso* *squeeze*
*puts farting powder in Avis’s espresso* hehehe *puts on gas mask* *hides behind crates*
It’s a good thing I don’t drink coffee.
*lights and throws stink bomb behind the snickering crates*
*saunters away, whistling*
eww.. hope none of it splashed on me…
*throws single flake of confetti*
*attempts to uncork champagne but is already fizzled*
*looks at fizzled champagne*
*thinks it could be guzzled*
*makes sure the Admiral is nuzzled*
*fits together like jigsaw puzzle*
*helps to keep away the confuzzles*
*pours two glasses of good champagne, clinks and guzzles*
*and there was much rejoicing*
*Can’t help but think of the Holy hand Grenade*
HI EVERYONE!!!! i thing i’m building a super-human tollerance to caffiene. I just drank a 24 oz coffee and a 12 oz red bull and i’m still falling asleep at my desk… does anyone know anything that works better and won’t make me too jittery?
Like that Futurama episode?
The one where Fry drinks 100 cups of coffee?
I think the only thing stronger is meth and I think it fails your jittery rule.
I find a hot shower and a spot of exercise works wonders in the morning. And no jitters at all!
A good night’s sleep before you get to work, Abstract!
Um, seriously, the things I can think of are mostly illegal, but perhaps that 5-hour energy boost thing that the football players advertise? Has anyone tried it?
ha, sleep, who needs that. idk, i do sleep about 7 hours a nightidk, i’ll try the energy shots and see. thanks
Yes, I’ve tried the 5 hour energy shot. It has the caffeine of a cup of coffee, plus a ton of vitamin B12 and B6. No sugar. I’ve had good results, but only use it when caffeine isn’t working for me, and I absolutely NEED to be awake. The lemon lime flavor is disgusting, the others taste like Smarties.
You could try cocaine, but the I think that also fails your not jittery condition. Of course I don’t think you were interested in heart failure either, so maybe you should just get more coffee.
You might try dousing your feet with cold water. No kidding.
A good night’s sleep?
abstract!!
abstract!!
Yeah. Over here dear. Listen to me. Put the caffeine down. Step awaaaaaaaaay from it slowly and don’t look at it again for the rest of the day.
Go home and sleep for as long as you can. Turn off your cell phone, TV, home phone and just rest.
yeah. maybe i’m still worn out from all the running this weekend. i have off tomorrow to try to get things done around the house from when it exploded on our way out of town……. maybe i’ll just sleep late and take it easy in the morning
Sleep is my friend!
Someone needs to stock up on Five Hour Energy.
*Holds up tiny bottle, label facing abstract*
*Gives cheesy thumbs up*
love it! we have this game at my friends house called “you’re in the movies” and it uses a camera that puts your image on the TV. we usualy play during parties, and the guys love to pretend they’re in beer commercials. We always yell at our one firend, “label out, label out”
Sleepy? Having trouble making it to work without drifting head-on into a milk-truck and exploding in a gigantic milky fireball? Well, we have your solution! The self-flagellator! Simply thrash the spiked tails against your back, arms, and legs, and you’ll be wide awake and screaming in pain in no time!
Act now, and you’ll get a FREE electro-shock therapy kit! Great for use at either home or office! How much would you pay for both these fantastic items? Well, don’t answer, because it’s only $10.99!! That’s right! Order now!
I tried self-flagellation. It didn’t work very well for me. It got all red and raw. I had to put lotion on it for a week before it felt better.
Doh..
*scurries to get lotion for nuts*
Ahhh…that is better!
Thanks Jimbo spoken like someon with lots of experience???
*pulls out rifle and shoots “e” to above post*
*hides bag from DW’s behind back*
Psstt. Hey Jimbo, you have anything with a bushy tail in that bag??
*takes a break from the kitchen*
So, how is everyone?
I am awesome!!
Um…what are you making?
Let me guess, something with pesto?
Among other things!
I am making a salad of roasted corn, grape tomatoes and chives. Another salad of roasted fingerling potatoes, green beans, tropeo onion, cucumber and red bell pepper. I’ll make pesto as well, in a little while.
There’s another free concert at Millennium Park this evening and I’m planning a picnic!
…Wow…You should start a home cooking show or something.
I’m working on figuring out a picnic business. Something with maybe 4 fixed menus, that you could order for 2 or for 4, and that you could pick up at the pavilion.
And no, I won’t be adding any other “supplies” to the items provided.
Though that would be funny!
I understand that the “supplies” come with a great profit margin, you might want to increase the bottom line.
Avis, that is a brilliant idea! Let us know how that turns out for you.
I may only work out the logistics by the end of this summer, but next spring signs go up, and business starts!
Let’s see.
Picnic basket for 4 $55.00
Picnic basket for 4 with “special” brownies $150.00
Get em while they are hot!
More like picnic bag (the nice kind with handles) for 4 $80.
Everything is from scratch, and all the accoutremont come with, napkins, cups, flatware, moist towellettes, salt, pepper, corkscrew and so on. I cannot provide the wine, as liquor laws are very strict here. Also? The crowd most likely to avail themselves of such a service wouldn’t even blink at the price.
But I did some math, and that’s what they’d have to cost to turn a profit. That is unless I can find less expensive ingredients.
*salivating*
I want some!!!!!!!! The fingerling potatoes are sooooo good when roasted. Crunchy on the outside and buttery on the inside.
*thanks her lucky stars for farmers markets*
Another reason to hate where I live. They have the sadest most depressing farmers markets. Everything is in a jar (chutney, jam, etc) and hand made soaps and shit…I mean, where is the produce dammit!!!??!!!
*takes a deep breath*
Ooooooooooommmmmmmmmmm!!!!!!!
This is one reason why the mid-west is a pretty good place to live. GREAT farmers markets! Those soaps are pretty nice too. I’m learning how to do my own canning though.
You can can?
*dances*
*opens a can of legumes*
Soon!
*hands Leila a fresh bunch of beets from the garden* these are so good!! You should see the crop we’ve turned out this year
I ♥ beets!! Especially cuz it makes pretty colors when you … never mind!
Thank you abstract!!!!
Ooooh….PICKLE those suckers!!!
Yes, then you can make PICKLE SURPRISE!!
With pickled beets? That’s gonna leave a mark.
That’s beta than being vulgaris.
*SNORK!!*
The vicar calls it the root of all evil.
Yeah, but you know he’d tap that root.
When he was younger he could keep a beet for a long time; now that he’s older he gets borscht.
“When he was younger he could keep a beet for a long time; now that he’s older he gets borscht.”
Congratulations on that comment, Admiral. That’s really given me the giggles.
Uh, in my garden…tomatoes, corn, squash, cucumbers, watermelon, cilantro, cayenne peppers, jalapeno peppers, bell peppers, okra, lettuce, bush beans, and last but not least….The Larch
ONE thing is missing……no avocado tree?
I love everything you listed. I am not sure what bush beans are however. I’ve been banned from eating watermelon because I don’t have the strength to make myself stop after a couple of slices.
Bush beans are simply green beans that grow on bushes not vine type plants that you have to string up so they are off the ground. Hence the name “string beans”. I have peach and pear trees, but no avocado. Do have a pecan tree so I can fill up my nut sack. But, I don’t share those too often. Ms Skratdaddy gets mad…But I could make an exception.
*big squeezies*
I didn’t see basil on that list! I don’t think I or my step-father could survive without basil! Of course, we can’t have a garden, so we make do.
We had problems with the herbs this year…DEA raid
I mean deer raid.
Uh-huh. Yeah. Ok.
garden… *sings softly* Id like to be under the sea, in an octopuses garden, in the shade.la la la la la la la la la la , hm hmm hm hm hmmm hm hm hm hm…
*gives Leila’s Clone a sham-wow*
*sneaks some farting powder into salad* hahaha… *sneaks off into distance*
*follows into the distance and TWACKS Tofu with a shellacked mackerel*
*tosses an “H“into above comment*
Grrrrrrrr!
ow! hey, get out of here! this is my distance!!! >:(
Then stop tampering with the foodstuffs!
ill tamper any foodstuffs i want! … wanna cookie???
*THWACK*
*rubs head* :\
I can’t speak for everyone but I’m doing great. And you Avis? And what are you doing in the kitchen?
*Crosses fingers and hopes Avis is cooking*
Decent, haven’t had the time to surf Failblog recently.
Why not?
Work, family problems, etc.
*squeeze*
Good to see you anyway and sorry about the problems Bobby.
Yeah, what she said!
*points to Leila’s Clone*
*squeezes back with superman like strength*
Meh, it’s nothing serious. Just time consuming.
*bear hugs Bobby with super human strength*
Save the super human squeezes for the super humans. We don’t want to have to clone Leila again. You’ve seen what that does to BFF.
Wait. What?
What did I miss?
You were almost super human hugged to death.
mmmm hmmmm.
What’s going on here?
*bear hugs Jenny*
Young lady, where have you been all morning!?
Probably fighting a hangover. What was that about drunk dialing?
*squeezes to everybody I haven’t squeezed today*
Hi bobby, long time!
I am splendid, but hungry….
*looks at Avis with puppy dog eyes*
*whimpers a little*
Well jeez! Help yourself! The beauty of virtual food is you never run out!
*
*was tempted to make you beg
Oooooh, awesome.
*goes silent, because his Mom taught him not to talk with his mouth full*
He couldn’t find anything else to do a handstand on? What a moron
Hi FB’ers, sorry to barge in, and more sorry if this is a repeat, but if anyone’s interested we over at ICHC are going to have a moment of silence and a balloon ceremony for Elsa_Mama on Saturday. The announcement by cweenmj is on the current picture (didn’t know the word help) very near the top of the comments. Thanks, and we now return you to your regularly scheduled hilarity.
Oh, and *squeeze.*
parrothead, what a nice thing to do for Elsa_Mama. I will go check out the announcement.
I am still miffed that my comments to Elsa_Mama never posted.
(most comments that go into moderation never come back out. the moderators are always hungry.)
appropo (how’s that for a good non-lolspeak word?
) of this, i would like to remind all failbloggers who would like to participate that they should make their first post (if they haven’t already) on ICHC well in advance (at least a day), so that the moderators can chew you over and decide whether or not you are spam.
also (i didn’t think to mention this last time when we did the LBT) you need to do your breaking-in posts with the SAME NAME you plan to use at the event. ICHC doesn’t let you do spur-of-the-moment name changes.
finally, as gaynorvador learned, if your name contains anything that could be construed as being the least bit s*xual, you’ll need to find an alternative so that the moderators don’t go into conniptions.
Thanks. So now, can you translate the announcement cweenmj posted in plain ‘ol English for those of us who don’t do lolspeak? *squeeze*
IDK!
For some reason no matter how many times and how nicely wrtten my posts are, They NEVER seem to show up on ICHC! :tears:
they might not like your name; it might seem too violent or “anti-animal”
try substituting a “@” for the “a” thusly: ro@dkill (this is what fixed gaynorvador’s problem). or you might just have to give yourself a special ICHC name if that doesn’t work.
OH! Please excuse my silliness, I hadn’t read about Matt when I posted that above. My condolences go out to Elsa_Mama and all of Matt’s family and close friends.
I had a problem like that last year, Roadkill…. all of a sudden I was unable to post under the signon/email I had been using for months. Ended up trying new email/online name combos until I found another one it liked. Keep trying!
here is the official non-lolspeak announcement, from the cheezfrends facebook group:
“Matt, Elsa_Mama’s 14 year old son, lost his 10 month fight aganst leukaemia. Throughout this time Elsa_Mama, and Matt, showed great strength and dignity, kept strong by their faith.
Elsa_Mama sought light relief in ICHC, and we took her to our hearts and many of us cried with her when we heard of Matt’s passing.
A funeral mass will be held for Matt on Saturday 1st Aug at 9.30am, Chicago time. As so few of us can be there in person, I propose we show our respects at the nearest timed LOL – that will be 2am (ICHC time) /10am(EST)/ 3pm(TTI)/ 4pm(Rest of Europe).
WordPress won’t let you post an empty comment, so we can’t do a 2 minute “Silence” as such, instead please post just the name “Matt”, in a separate comment box, for the first 2 minutes of the LOL. I will post an explanation, similar to this, as the first comment.
Ruth/Ambercat”
(note: “TTI” is Teeny Tiny Ingerland, aka England (also the rest of Great Britain) )
oops, i found a correction that needs to be made on the times:
10am Eastern, 7am Pacific, *4am* ICHC time (the same as Hawaii time; this is the time that will show on the time stamps on the comments)
Thank you for the info and the translation. I hope I can post.
Hi lunarmommy.
If one really would like to post an empty “silent” comment, you can simply place a “.” between a “<" and another one of those, going the opposite direction, in the comment box.
.
<3
*silence*
*loud-type silence*
Thanks for the announcement, cheezpeeps…I’ll be sure to stop by.
*squeezies*
I’ll certainly do my best, too.
I can’t. I tried posting, but my comments kept getting chomped.
hmm. i don’t know what you’ve tried or what the timing has been, but what seems to work is to post (and that first post will never ever be seen again) then go back in a day or so and post again and hopefully you’ll show up then.
or if for some reason The System has decided it doesn’t like you, try a variation of your name, like Alice from FB, and follow the procedure above.
See, this is exactly why chasing parked cars is dangerous and should be banned!
The car was still and the pavement was moving!Mrs Zorro.
ouch… that must hurt… I wonder if he’s stuckk…. XDDDDD
Can u make a iphone app of ur website?please
iFail?
Please NO.
I hope for his sake that’s not his car…
I hope for his sake that it is his car.
I think our pile driving wrestler had too much sake.
idiot
We prefer Logically challenged
I love it, he is like, “hmm, this is kinda comfortable”
OMG what a moron
Did he die?
yes
11 times.. ON FIRE
and being stabbed with dry ice!!!!
*likes the growing violence*
he died caused of starvation. he never came out
oh, poor man D:
Bye y’all…Time to run.
*squeezes all around*
bye!
I wonder whether it was his own car, and if so, whether that makes it more or less of a FAIL.
AHEM!!
Everyone go to the new FB post.
GO!
GO!
Frailblog!
N the car doesn’t have an alarm…
That’s breaking into a car… in style.
E-C-F^**ING W!
hahaha his dull and emotionless expression!
HAHAHA
Way to go- fat ass!!!
glass always shatters in contact w/ an ass xD
I’m not sure who the bigger morons are. The guy who broke the back window, or us who are commenting and watching this … first and last time at this blog.
the look on his face was priceless…
poor chamade….
Shouldn’t… Shouln’t there be blood?
I mean, he just crashed through a window. I mean, I’m a writer, not a physicist, but doesn’t that tend to result in broken glass?
And broken glass, in my experience, results in multiple lacerations, which results in loss of blood.
Then all you can do can do is hope that it doesn’t have coral snake venom on it (Also, since when do Norwegian shamans carry around coral snakes anyways?)
There’s two references in here. First person to get both wins money dollars.
Damn, that’s three.
cars have some kind of security glass, such kind of accident does not have to lead to bleeding injuries.
THIS IS GOOD
there is only one thing to say…. L!O!L!
lol
clown ^^
Hes like “W0t”
is it me or did he look comfy?