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Cheezburger Network Blog
Goal!
Fail!
Win?
Lose.
Draw.
.
.
*shakes fist at Jules*
*whips out a pad of paper and a pencil and draws a butterfly*
*proudly displays drawing to Velvet*
See? It’s a horse!
I think it needs a little shading there.
And more cowbell!
.
.
*squeezes all around*
I’ve got a fever!!
*jangles velvet’s cowbell*
Nurse Velvet to Brewski’s rescue.
.
*squeeze* Now, cough.
I have a cold to… I might need some attention.
*looks hopeful, fakes a cough*
*grabs Aiki and puts him in the convertible*
.
You need some sun and fresh salt air.
.
*speeds away*
Dr. Czuhc at your service!
Oops, forgot to warn you, I’ve just been shaking cocktails.
Dr. Czuhc at your service!
Oops, forgot to warn you, I’ve just been shaking cöcktails.
*looks at empty room*
Dang, too late due to moderation problems. Now nurse, where’s that man for the prostate exam?
Ooo, there’s a humongous swelling allright! I’d better schedule him for an operation.
*puts on grave face and starts typing*
*is actually failblogging*
I was having a nice dream, when…
*sees czuhc in rubber gloves*
AAAAHHHH!!!! Wha?!
*flees*
Need more lol! lol
What for? lol?
This joke has legs. lol
You smoked his kegs? lol
This cake is Peg’s
It’s a SKWERL!
*points at bushy tail*
No it’s a plane.
No it’s a train.
No it’s an automobile.
it’s Superman!!
*take out telephoto lens*
That’s not Superman it’s just Brewski in his pooh under wear, again.
*walks a way disappointed, again*
its an egg salad sandwich!
Here in Spain, this happens almost everyday
Automobiles?
*confused*
No one expects the Spanish inquisition!
I think most do, but act surprised so the Spanish inquisition isn’t disappointed.
GASP!!!
Rain?
NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! Our chief weapon is planes… planes and trains… trains and planes… Our two weapons are planes and trains… and ruthless efficiency… Our *three* weapons are planes, trains, and ruthless efficiency… and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope… Our *four*… no… *Amongst* our weapons… Amongst our weaponry…are such elements as planes, trains…
I’ll come in again.
*SNORK!*
Lose?
Draw?
Check?
*hands Jules the bill*
That’ll be $1.49.
*hands DW a buck, fifty*
Keep the change.
Lousy tipper!
♬ It’s a long way to tipperary…♬
Sorry.
I know a Rabbi who can sort that out for you.
what, his filing cabinet?
*is so NOT gonna say it!*
Mate?
Bingo!
Surrender?
BMW?
What did Aja do to make you cry?
Once upon a time, the world was at peace. Then, on May 1st, 2009 the Audi Billboard Fail was posted.
Mayhem and destruction followed thereafter and, worst of all, many BMW WIN!!!11!!! comments appeared and totured poor Arthur.
*torrrrrrrrtured
And they lived happily ever after.
You drew at losing.
WIN!
*draws Moomin closer*
Did you hump my leg in the past fail? Hmmm…??? *squeeze*
*raises eyebrow*
Does your leg smell of marshmallow?
If not, it wasn’t me.
PS. . .
*loses himself in Leila’s squeeze*
Should have thought of that sooner.
*hides from DW and Loz*
I learned this from Arthur.
*points DW and Loz to Moomin’s hiding spot*
I add a romantic postscript about losing myself in your squeeze and get dobbed in.
This is a fine to-do.
Ruin the mood why don’t you.
Awww…I am sorry.
There there! I will make it up to you.
Why are you hiding from me, anyway?? Because you said “me” instead of “I”??
As if I’d give you a hard time about that.
I’ve forgotten when to use have and of.
*scuffs feet on floor*
Did I accidenty get it right?
Hahahahaha.
Sort have.
Oh…oh my, Moomin! That’s the funniest thing I’ve read all day!!!
*clutches sides, laughing*
good morning. wait…. good afternoon!
*Mimosa*
You have been Mimosa’ed, so join the party!
*squeeze*
wats mim… mimi… mimos..mimosa???
Champagne with orange juice. It’s yummy!
*hands Tofu a mimosa*
Er, Tofu is underage, lurk. But we have some excellent non-alcoholic drinks for you Tofu! What would you like?
he got Mimosa’ed????
…… can i have a turn?
If you’re playing sucker, you always Fail.
I never have.
Missed blocking the ball allowing it to score?
*Takes away the ‘missed’, kicks it, bounces off of Dragon, enter the net*
Damn it.
Oh, come on…if she blocked ALL the balls and never allowed anyone to score, she’d never have any fun at all!
We really never run short of innuendo around here, do we?
It is hard for us to keep a handle on it.
But we keep going and going….
Careful! Don’t go all the way!!
Uh oh. Now look what you did.
*tries harder*
*goes longer*
*digs deeper*
*spends money*
*goes for broke*
*hits it rich*
*tries for double or nothing*
Jackpot! I won.
*pays out*
*robs Brewski*
*steals Leila*
*hits up leila*
Wait…what?
*reports Emp for domestic abuse*
It’s not Sunday yet.
*Wonders why jules is confused*
Cash always follows when you hit directionally… :S
Hits up is directional and therefore does not constitute abuse.
Why would we want that to happen, brewski?
.
*gooses brewski and runs*
*runs and catches velvet*
*gives gaggle of goosings*
*giggles*
*pins brewski on floor and tickles him*
Aaaaahhhh!!!
Nooo! Stop!
*thrashes around*
*finds velvet’s feet and tickles the bottom of them mercilessly*
The innuendo machine has been upgraded to vibrate too now.
*sits on top of the innuendo machine*
Wheeeeeee!!!!
The machine was already vibrating… I’d be careful.
*facepalm* Refresh!
Noop. Notta chance.
No no no, it’s Ni.
^Ni-jerk reaction.
*snork!*
We are the knights that say “Ni!”.
We are no longer the knights who say ni! We are now the knights who say ekki-ekki-ekki-pitang-zoom-boing!
Nope, there is a BJ’s wharehouse just down the road. We go get some more whenever we run low.
*typing with wrong hand, while holding baby *
Well if she first kick the balls, then scores on herself, would that be considered a failed cöck block?
Yes.
Yeow! Can you imagine the pain involved with scoring after a hard rebound off of Leila (or was it Abstract) — ??
idk, you guys talk to fast. hee hee. actually I’m just really bussy at work today.
You drive people around the bend?
yes, it’s full of typos, notice how I misused to. s/b too. ah well. I am swamped here and trying to smeak in comments here and there. no time to check my gramar and spelling sorry.
It’s okay. Just post them and we will work out the issues.
*corrects smeak to sneek*
*corrects gramar to grammar*
Not checking for sentence structure however. It’s not my job today.
*corrects sneek to sneak*
I had to do it. I just had to!
*Corrects wing position*
Um…? Wait that can’t be right. Anyone else find the blogs sellout to spore lagging it a bit?
HAH!!! I have no business correcting others it seems.
*sneaks out of room*
*Follows Leila all sneaky like.*
ahh, phew, thanks! I feel better leaving my typos about now!
Hi!! Elsa_Mama. *squeeze*
It was definitely abstract.
ROFL!!!
lol. wouldnt have fun
So, you’re saying you play for the other team?
*rofl* I think it means playing both sides of the field.
*squeezes abstract*
So she swings both ways?
Can you put her on top of the car and move her?
Only if you are going to give her a ride.
wooooo! weeeeeee! I like this ride!
indeed I do, and proudly!
*squeeze* sorry i’m late!
lol, no i’m saying I was playing for both teams
YAY Starfish!!!
*flings confetti and pops champagne*
Way to go, starfish!
Wooo Starfish… FTW!
High Five star.. umm or all five?
Wouldn’t that be kind of like a slap in his face?
Yay for Starfish!
We’re suckers for a good party. WTG Starfish!
Starfish FTW!! Woo hoo!
Wrestle The Gators?
With Tentacles Galore
Whoop Thundering Gooooaaaaallllll
Water Tastes Good
What The Goo?
*didn’t think Zombies drank water*
Water? No thanks, fish make love in water.
*likes B’s better*
*zombies don’t “drink” much of anything, no idea where mine came from*
No sucking goes on during these parties. At least, none that I know of.
Starfish sucks, especially when he gloms on to dinner and flexes his mussels.
OK, maybe that didn’t work. I’ll go into my corner now.
You don’t have to clam up on my account.
Thanks Starfish! How very unshellfish of you!
I’m feeling a little crabby this morning. Pizza is coming, which will help.
Oh no! Is that a giant Asteroidea heading towards the earth??
*shades eyes with hand and squints into the distance*
Dang. It isn’t. Where IS he, anyway?
Are you pin(cushion)ing a new name on Starfish?
Consider it echinoderm of endearment.
Woo hoo, yay for Starfish!! Drinks are on me today.
*throws down gold card*
*squeeze*
Congratulations!
*super squeeze to all*
Starfish FTW.
YAY! *gives starfish a beer*
What’s FTW mean?
It means “Fill the wessel” (as spoken by Checkhov on ST).
For some reason I read that as “Fill the Weasel” and I can’t figure out why.
I did too, and it took me several minutes to realize my mistake.
*hides face*
For the win.
You did what to the world?
Fondled, I believe.
No Judy, it was much more than that. Fornicate The World.
WOOHOOOOOOO!!!
*claps starfish on the…the….*
Hm. I hope that was your back. Anyway, CONGRATS!
That had to have been embarrassing!
But coach you have to admit, it was a great kick.
Had some real leg behind it.
Quite the boot.
It was a punt! A punt!!
Bet it got his toes in some door.
Or a foot up the âss.
Mortifying.
A real kick in the pants.
He’s probably going to get booted from the team.
Naw, you don’t get kicked out for one goal.
Still, the other team members will now have a leg up on him.
It will take an amazing feet to overcome this obstacle.
If they toe the line they will make it big.
Yay Starfish!!!
*throws confetti*
Starfish is da man…er, fish!!!
*pops champagne bottle open*
*whips out the orange juice*
Mimosa anyone?
Me me me me ….!!!!! Mimosa…I want!!!
It’s dangerous out there, take this:
*hands Leila a flask of Mimosa*
Eeeeeeeeeee!!! A whole flask???? *guzzles it down*
Free refills?
*upgrades flask to water jug*
See if this one is more to your liking, miss.
As long as it’s mimosa in there and none of that clear H2O crap, I am good.
For you, only the best.
Whoooooooooo!!!
*inserts a super huge straw in water jug and sips*
Good mimosa!!
*hic*
*hic*
Can I have a refill please?
Oh boy!!!
*Gives Leila refill, up to the very top*
(Hee hee!)
*hands Leila a gatorade cooler filled with mimosa, place a whole pineapple on the rim*
Sure thing just let me know. I am here to serve.
Can you make a good martini?
Careful, Jules. That’s what Aiki said yesterday.
*fills tub w/mimosa and dives in*
Whooo!!!
*hic*
*Throws pineapple slices into tub with Leila*
Don’t pull the plug, that would be wasteful! You have to drink all that!
Oh, martinis! I prefer gin and olives myself, but I can mix with vodka if you prefer?
Yes please! Although I thought we were up to screwdrivers already…
Don’t be a wimp! *hands Bearly a mimosa*
*sniff*
*looks hopeful*
May I have one of those?
*bats eyelashes*
Scorpion Bowl for me… it’s getting close to lunch.
Scorpion bowl? You will hae to explain that.
It’s probably some Japanese reference.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scorpion_bowl
This should explain it. For those that are adventurous only (not the link; the drink. The link is work safe.)
I see
*replaces champagne in mimosa with rum*
*pours in a large martini glass adds a wedge of pineapple and an umbrella*
Here you go.
It’s a mixed drink. One that packs a punch I believe.
*hands Avis a mimosa in tall glass line with sugar and topped with a fanned strawberry*
I hope this will work for you.
Woo Hoo! Yes, please and thank you!
*Immediately offers Avis a mimosa*
Um *voice crack* hear you are. Hot, um I’m sorry, not that you couldn’t get one yourself. I mean I like you, um to serve you. *pulls at own collar*
I am just going to go over to get another drink now. Um ya.
*exits hastily*
*raises eyebrow at Emp*
*wonders if he realizes that lines like that don’t really work*
*thinks bars are a terrible place to meet people*
She raised her eyebrow at me. Yay. Oh I know lines are terrible, some have worked only by me passing the off as knowingly cheesy. But I only used them on my friends sarcastically in the end. Went up to my best friend, that is a woman now, and used the U and I one. She laughed and passed me a drink that some random guy bought her. Safe to say that when she goes to clubs and bars she walks away with more money than she came in with.
That actually sounds kinda skeezy. Her leaving with more money than when she arrived, that is. Something about it just… doesn’t…. sound right.
Meant it more as a figure of speech. In the end it seems all the money most of the girls I know spend when they go to clubs is either the limo, taxi and cover. They get drinks bought for them all night long. Sometimes we will go back and fourth paying for each other but ya. They don’t often bring much on them, they some how know they will be picked up/ males will make the attempts.
Oh and I prefer random encounters at places one wouldn’t expect to meet someone. Ie picking out the last book in a Chapters store. She was a great gal that one, now one of my closer friends.
Have you got enough for one more?
Absolutely! *hands mimosa*
Say, Chan, I posted something for you, I suspect you never saw it. Go here:
failblog.org/2009/06/22/norton-antivirus-fail/#comment-484241
YIKES!!! Never mind, I just updated my cache.
I took your advice.
The pics of me or of my kitties were the only ones handy, but I managed to locate the one I wanted all along. Now be faced with the awesome power of ZIM!
Grr put that moose down!
You DO NOT mess with the moose.
I miss the cupcake.
References too good to be coincidence. While I suppose I should have expected it, I am surprised and pleased that people know! Too many have not been exposed to Zim. It’s a sad fact. Hurts me in my squeedily-spooch.
I have to say my fav episode is when Gir takes over the house brain…and tacos…aahhh, funny stuff.
GIR is the absolute best character ever. That’s one of my favourite eps, too! Although I’m particularly fond of the Christmas special.
Me.
I actually like it when people use real pics. And you had a really good one there, very cute. But, you’re probably safer now.
*squeeze*
But, people still won’t know if you’re a guy or girl until they get to know you.
LIES!! You never commented on my pic.
*looks at Leila’s pic*
Um. You’re short. And you have pink petals. That’s about all I’ve got. Until I develop ESP.
*recalls spy camera network*
*tunes in to Leilas desk*
*switches to under-desk view*
*back to upper view*
Very nice!
*leaves monitor on*
*switches back to under-desk view*
Err… Minnie Mouse?
Mickey Mouse is filing for divorce from Minnie.
Divorce Lawyer: So, you say you’re filing for divorce because Minnie is going crazy.
Mickey: No, I said she was phuqing Goofy!
*pours Chanidividus a mimosa*
I have not seen you around before, welcome and I hope you enjoy. This one is on the house.
Okay, as long as you don’t leave me up there… I’m not so good with heights.
*snork*
As long as you don’t fall into the gutter you should be fine.
Oh, dear. I’m doomed then!
The gutter hasn’t been cleaned since last week. Believe me. It’s DIRTY!!!
*glances at Brewski*
*pulls out the hose*
Wait am I clean the gutter or Brewski?
Yes.
…and I am hoping he is using a real garden hose.
Do I have a bullseye on my behind today, or what??
*runs away*
No I am going with a fire hose.
I think I am going to need the extra cleaning power.
Again – for the gutter or Brewski?
Both.
A commentator on a Scottish match called Jock?!? You have to be kidding me.
Don’t worry. I am.
*squeeze!*
Och aye, a see that noo.
*squeezes*
Now we have the Jocks and the Geordies.
This is fine and Dandy!
*squeeze*
Aye lad. Oor Wullie’ll be happy aboot that!
*geordiestealthbadgersqueeze*
They’ll be singing ‘Knees up Mother Broon’!
*wiggledances*
Thall Beano knees up if yi divvunt bring the Broon.
*bumdances*
Betty, I didn’t recognize you without the accent. You wouldn’t happen to be an FB regular that often gets eaten?
I’m a jam sponge?
You are Jam!!! I have no idea why seeing you write with a Scottish accent made think you were Jam, but I was right.
Sshhhh!
Don’t tell everyone.
I think it’s revealed by now. Several times.
Hopefully, only the right people notice though.
Seems that banning had some effect. It’s remarkably peaceful here lately.
Woopwoopwoop! I’m clean so I’m happy.
@Starfish… It wasn’t Scottish. :p
My bad. Accents are hard to figure out when you hear them, seeing them written is even harder. BTW, your secret is safe with me, Betty.
Gracious! Who were you hiding from, JaBetty?
Umm… I’m in a bit of a trifle now.
*goes off to get trollied*
By accent I mean an Irishwoman pretending to be Scottish.
Starfish FTW!
HAHAHAHA!
*goes off to work on the vernacular*
You wouldn’t happen to be an FB regular that often gets eaten?
…out?
I think I might have noticed that.
Ouch.
That guy must feel like a total ass!! Ha ha ha!
*sniffs*
*looks down*
AAAAHHHHH!!!! My pants are on fire!!
*runs around screaming and waving arms*
*stops, drops and rolls*
*rips off flaming remnants of formerly-shiny parachute pants*
Whew.
Oh. Great. It figures it’s laundry day and I wore my Winnie-The-Pooh briefs.
How embarrassing, pooh on your briefs.
Since when do you wear pants?
*hides lighter*
If your briefs have Pooh on ‘em then I suggest you take them off as well.
So, what was it you were lying about?
I believe his pants were ignited as punishment for wearing parachute pants and committing fashion sin.
Yes I believe that is in chapter five, “Thou shalt not wear thine parachute pants or be burned alive whilst wearing them.”
Yes, right after the edicts about spandex capacity and the abuse of it’s stretch.
Ah, yes of course, of course..
You’re gonna bring back all those repressed memories of the 80’s if you keep this up.
1987, would that it could be forgotten!
♫ Get outta my dreams! Get into my car! ♪
Oh, sorry, 1987!
♫ Walk like an Egyptian! ♫
If I can ever get pics on my blog I’ll post one from about that year. The worst fashion choices I have ever made! Each one was bad enough, but all together? In one picture? Priceless.
Wow. I feel like a child! **Was being swaddled in a pink blankie that year**
I was twelve. While that is a perfectly appropriate age to wear giant sweatshirts over leggings, I probably shouldn’t have work that sweatshirt. Or the rubber fish earrings. Or the crimped hair. Or the peach glasses frames. Did I mention the sweatshirt had bows on it? Big ones. Made out of sweatshirt material. In pinks and purples. It’s bad, really bad.
I saw a picture of myself from 1987 recently. It was taken at the homecoming dance. I was wearing a Cosby sweater with a black turtleneck underneath and a gold chain over the turtleneck. The look was completed by flock of seaguls hairdo and an earing in just my left ear. Not shown in the picture were my Z Cavriche’s (SP?), pegged at the ankles. Yikes.
I always suspected you were one smooth mover…
We need a pics section on aiki’s site! I’m tired of people saying “I don’t have a place to post my pictures!”
You were progressive! Those things didn’t hit my neck of the woods ’til ‘89! High School was a sea of pants pegged at the ankle and there were mall bangs as far as the eye could see!
*never fell prey to the mall bang trend*
I’m trying to find a leisure suit for Halloween. That and some platform shoes.
Avis, I just did some math and realized that the picture had to have been taken at the homecoming dance in 1988. In 1987, we were still wearing the Don Johnson look in southern California.
Shoulder pads under oversized shirt, cinched at the waist with a very large belt.
This all over leggings & knee-high spike heel leather boots.
Yeah, Baby.
Man did I have a crush on Susanna Hoff in 1987. She was soooooo hot.
Yeah, 1987, the year Mount Czuhc had a major hormone eruption. Susanna Hoff! Mel and Kim! The Cosby daughters!!!
I would *squeeze* but I’m not sure what would come out.
*all excited*
That’s my cue!
Ahem:“Squeeze it. If you feel like brushing your teeth with the stuff that comes out, it’s toothpaste”.
How did I do?
*SNORK!*
Jennyisbusy actually admitted to buying those shiney parachute pants for Brewski. I don’t understand. She needs a good talking to.
Can’t touch this!! She was just trying to help!
I guess you didn’t touch them though, did you?
No…I scorched them.
I don’t think those edicts have made it here to the midwest yet. Please send a copy to the organizers of the Wisconsin State Fair.
I think at this point, it should just be a well-known fact, and we’re beyond posting rules. I vote for a search-and-destroy squad being employed to prevent crimes involving too-tight fabrics.
That makes sense. What is the punishment for Winnie the Pooh undies?
Being seen in them is punishment enough.
Maybe he should take them off so he can be spanked properly.
*throws vase on floor, shattering it*
Am I a bad boy?
*dons black leather*
*cracks whip*
Spanking?
A spanking a spanking, Oh bad naughty Brewski, turning on the grail shaped sign.
This is VERY interesting.
*starts videotaping the spanking*
*dives across Ms B’s lap*
I’ve been baaaaad!!! I’ve been running around most the afternoon with Pooh underwear!!
You asked for it…
*puts Aja, Moomin and Arthur in line*
They are next.
*grimaces*
*waits*
Back in line again?
Hey! Get to the end of the line!
*wonders is sponges can jump the queue*
*squashes in front of Aja*
*waits to absorb the punishment*
Oh! I didn’t even feel a thing!
I’m not sure whether I should be thrilled, or disappointed!
All right, let’s do this…
Everyone’s gone to the next fail?
Mr B, did you strike out?
I’m really not quite sure what to think of the new direction the blog has been going in lately. Frankly, I’m more than a little disappointed in some of you.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
My timing is still a bit off.
Definitely a bit over the top, Judy. Think it’s time to reign it in a notch?
*Snork!!!*
That didn’t work out the way I wanted it to at all! I meant to add a post script: that I was disappointed that no one thought to invite one of our newest bloggers, Oh She Of The Adult Intimacy Facilitators, Chanidividus, to bring some samples to the party. But, as luck would have it – I had to do a last minute emergency motion and have it filed at the courthouse, and never got back to finish!
Oh, and you –
*motions to Brewski, prostrate on his knees before the throne*
- you are dismissed! Begone!
The referee should call a free throw for the goalkeeper’s team because you can’t block the goalkeeper while he is trying to kick the ball. The goalkeeper has 6 seconds to move the ball or he would be penalized with a free throw against his team, inside his own area. If you block him, he can’t do it. Most of the times, the referees call the player who is blocking and order him to move away and give space to the goalkeeper to move the ball.
Sorry if i’m not clear with my english. I’ve learned watching movies! Is this good for engrish.com???
plz dont smoke weed
Ah but unless I am mistaken, the guy on the other team must be told to move. If the goal kicks it anyway, then he is responsible for putting the ball in play and all consequences that occur.
Thierry Henry got penalised for intercepting the ball between the goalies hand and foot, but once the goalie has kicked the ball it’s in play.
The goalie should just have kicked the ball somewhere else, not right at the person stood beside him.
*nods*
Nothing wrong here, except for a dumb goalie.
*wonders why Diego is telling us all this*
‘cos it’s a WIN then?
That the net result?
It is if you use your head. Or your hand.
Depends on your point of view, I suppose.
I wonder how much Spore paid for all that crap on the sides
What? There is nothing on the sides.
They must not have paid enough to put it on Leila’s.
If it are spores, you can’t see them but they’re everywhere. And then you die…unless you let me have a squeeze.
*already stops shaking the Boston shaker in anticipation*
I’m not quite sure what you just said, but you had me at Boston shaker.
*lives near Boston*
*still doesn’t know what “Boston shaker” means*
Kidding, right? I didn’t mean anything else by it than a certain type of cöcktail shaker and was referring to a thread somewhere up there ^^.
Cheap bastards!!!!
WTF is adblockplus not blocking this!?
Right click on it, block it. Worked for me.
It’s Football, not soccer
It’s both actually.
Ssshhht, don’t confuse the Americans.
*thwacks Arthur*
*sobs silently*
*hangs head*
*walks away slowly*
Just like a footballer to act like he’s grievously hurt.
Yeah…you’d think I fake headbutted him or something!
Shhhh!, how do you guys know all of us American football players secrets?
No, that would have been:
*screams loudly*
*falls down*
*rolls around in agony, holding various parts of his body*
*peeks at referee if he’s buying it*
(Referee shows yellow card to DW)
*stands up*
*sprints at full speed and tackles*
*gets transferred for 80 million pounds*
*gets booed every time he returns to old team’s stadium for being a sellout*
*crowd cheers when madrid loses the game
The person who submitted the video must have been american.
But it’s soccer, not football!
*convulses*
*Head alplodes*
See that, Gale? Don’t do that again.
*ahemFOOTBALLahem*
*smiles and nods*
“alplodes”? Do you have dogfood on the brain?
Mmmm dogfood.
(Hey Brewski!)
Did some one say food?
That will disappoint ZA.
I’d say ZA likes his brains to be unsullied, but if that were the case, he’d starve here.
I don’t know what you’re talking about.
*adjusts halo*
Uh-huh. Sure. Ok.
I see those horns holding that halo up!
Halo the size of Texas and as crooked as Mexico.
*disappointed*
I though they said everything is bigger in Texas.
Just the egos.
Actually, we’re not very picky when it comes to brains. Sullied, dirty – I’ve even been known to dip my face into a trolls head, where the “brains” are just a gooey mess of fecal matter!
.
That said, I’m not very particular to dog food either. Blech! Not that we can taste much of anything, of course … it’s just the principle.
Or Canadian. Don’t need to generalize.
Americans know of FFPS. Not the real soccer.
…which is called football.
*convulses*
NO. The English call it football. Every other nation has their own word for it. For instance soccer/football -> (English) is called calcio.
People call the sport something in their own language??
I never knew how it worked that way being called the worlds game and all that jazz. Arthur, how do you say it in german?
Fußball. I think almost every nation uses “football” in their respective language – except Italy. But hey, they’ve repeatedly elected Berlusconi, what do you expect?
You’d think the French would have done their own naming thing by now too, being French and all.
Ya croatian, and finnish may be the other two exceptions. From research that I just did. There may be others. There are lots of derivations of football that is for sure.
Something must be done. All these people inventing words in their own language!! The humanity!
All the words you used were from your own language! Stop that!
Here’s a kicker…
In japanese it can be pronounced ‘Sakka’ to represent soccer. However their actual name for it literally translates to kick + ball and (in Romaji) is Shuu Kyuu.
What’s the origin of the word “soccer”? Any language geeks out there?
Dammit! I know this. Because there were many variants of football across the country( i.e Rugby Football, Cambridge wall football(!) etc) “association football’ was the official code of rules to be used across the country. Soccer originates from the word “AsSOCiation” and was used to differentiate the official rules from the local variants.
I think that’s it.
The easiest way to piss off an European: Call football soccer.
Btw – I’m European and I do get edgy when I hear the word soccer :p
Football! Soccer!
Soccer! Football!
What’s the big deal?
I wish you would tell me.
Leila, che cosa dice questo pazzo? Credo che lui non le sa che tutti i nazione h’anno il suoi parole per il gioco che si chiama calcio. E solo l’inglesi che non piaciano chiamare football, soccer.
Come l’hai detto, lui è pazzo.
You say football. I say tomato.
I get banned from making salads.
Simple as.
I would hope so, if you’re putting footballs in the salad!
I thought it would give it a bit of a kick.
Kinda made it taste leathery.
When I have an idea like that it’d be silly not to run with it.
Make sure you have your cleats on.
it rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again
this goal is not legal, the player must be far away from the goalkeeper in the kick. REFEREE’S FAIL
Incorrect. It is the goalies fault. He has 44 yards horizontally to kick the ball. So it is the goalies responsibility to move around the player. Had the player followed him horizontally and then blocked it; well that would count as an illegal goal. You got to know the rules there solid.
I’ve failed…because I really don’t see the fail…?
Ask yourself two questions:
What was it the goalie wanted to do?
What happend?
Might help.
The goalie wanted to score. Instead he got an assist.
The goalie got distracted by the vuvuzela noise.
#*$%§ vuvuzelas!!!
He wanted to whack the player for blocking his kick. He stupidly kicked the ball to whack him without thinking that it might actually bounce back….dumass
fail!
dumbass*
I see Red.
I see dead people.
Where?
.
Oh.
Not anymore you eat them Zomboman.LOL
But Erick’s nowhere to be seen!
Is there an ecko in here?
yea……yea…..yea…..y…..e…..a…..
lol
HHHHHHHHEEEEEEEE SSSSSSSCCCCOOOOOORRRRRRREEEES !!!!!!!!!
This goal cost my team a place in the Europa Leauge, bloody Ma’Kalamity – worst goalkeeper I’ve seen in many a year. Made worse by the fact it was the sheep shaggers who got the win, and Lee Miller homosexual who “scored” the goal.
But the keeper in this actually went on to save a penalty later on in the game, I’m sure that made up for it…
Here’s another Scottish goalkeeping gaffe, also in Aberdeen’s favour, this time by Alan Combe:
Corinthians-Brazil!RONALDO
Double fail – Setanta Sports where this clip is from shut down just over an hour ago.
Gooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaallllllllll!!!!!!!
referee fail. this is ilegal. it should point a free kick for the goalkeeper because it got blocked by the other player. goalkeeper must have a free space to kick the ball back to the game.
but you don’t know much about soccer, do you?
The player was out side the box when the keeper kicked the ball. The keeper has the option to back up. So no it was a legal goal.
Wrong. Is inside the penalty area. Don’t you see the white line there??? Besides, the goalkeeper, ones he has the ball on his hands, can not walk around the penalty area, he has to move the ball, with his hands or feets. And the other player must leave space to play. The same happens in any other place of the field, when you have a free kick awarded.
I was just gonna say that is a referee fail. And yes, that obstruction is a foul and a yellow card.
The goalkeeper catches the ball and then ask the referee for distance (you can see his left arm moving). If you ever been in a field or played soccer, you should know.
The player on red, moves towards the goalkeeper. Is imposible for the goalkeeper to play fair.
Right place in the right time with the right stupid soccer-goalie kicking a ball in your back in the right angle and with right amount of force WIN?
It takes talent to fail that bad haha
this is one of the best i’ve ever seen.
Way to FAIL!!!
Title fail.
Obvz it’s football and not soccer, as stated before by my fellow nitpickers.
Title fail? But it’s a soccer clip, not a football clip!
(seriously, and not so much directed towards you, but why does this same stale argument come up EVERYTIME there’s a clip of *insert your regional term for sport in which guys kick ball into a goal*?)
Tomato, to-mah-to.
Although anybody actually pronouncing it to-mah-to would sound awfully gay…
I was there! In off Lee Miller’s airse and happy days!
It was almost as good as the one of the back of Darren Mackie’s head…
Why isn’t that an offside, BTW?
No, for off-side there has to be a forward pass between two team mates.
But this isn’t legal either.
The player should’ve let the goalie kick freely.
Kick Fail but a Goal Win!!!
lol…he can kiss his soccer career goodbye
That should have been a yellow…
I have to say this is more of a “blocking win!”
then a “kick fail”
LOL
This goal IS totally legal. Miller was walking away when it hit him.
Nae luck Dundee United!!!!!!!!!!
No Europe for you!!
COME ON YOU DONS!!!!!!!!!!!
lol, i was there… ma’kalamity …………..
And It’s Football, not Soccer.
American Football should be called Handball, because you carry it with your hands.
But if we called football “handball”, then what would we call “handball?” Man, you guys really mucked everything up by changing the name from soccer to football!
its still not a Goal. which what makes it a fail.
Did that really count as a goal O_o? I would be one pissed off Keeper if it did. I’ve had that somewhat happen to me during a game with a punt, but they didn’t count it at state. (greatest blood spurt I’ve every seen come from someones nose though.!)
That shouldn’t count as a goal, what a mistake by the ref… in Football you can’t block the keeper that way.
aw.. why did so many vids’ links break?
vid is back
)
Nice Kick Pele
this is typical of scottish football.
this is the standard that i was raised on
wow u know this is a yellow card in soccer cause ur not allowed to stand in front of the goalie while he kicks it