Wiper Placement Fail
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stupid germans
Pray be specific as from where your *coughretarded* conclusions poured.
the D on the License plate
Deutschland = germany
1) What is Denmark’s mark?
2) How come you’re sure it was a German who built it, just because it has a German license?
the manufacturer (f spelling) appears to be ford
oh, that makes the fail less fun then.
The manufacturer isn’t the important thing there. That wiper was originally on a window. They replaced that window with a piece of metal, for some reason.
The reason is unclear.
As is the “window”.
Yeah, I know. I’ll go sit in the corner now.
Feeling particularly opaque today, Avis?
Yeah, sometimes I think my head is solid the whole way through. Sometimes.
*squeeze*
*gives Avis a dense cookie*
Thanks! I’ll try not to be so thick!
*squeeze*
*compares Avis to two planks of wood*
*decides Avis is far better*
*squeeze*
*trips over box of rocks in the doorway*
Hey! Who left this here??
*pitches them out the window*
Um…oops. Maybe I should have opened the window first.
*is often awed by the sheer number of kind folks here!*
*squeeze*
did he die?
Hi
Hello . This is a car repair miss- communication.
customer” “Yea I need my left widow fixed”
Mechanic”Um your left or mine”
Stupid Americans.
Ford’s European branch designs its vehicles separately from its American branch. also, the Transit is not available in the US – we have the E-series, which fits our purposes nicely (which don’t include a partial rear window)
Just because it’s an American-based company doesn’t mean it wasn’t some German’s failure.
Oh you people!
What does it matter if it was a German or an American or some other nation?
First you can’t know it:
In Germany do live more about 7 million people from more than 70 countries.
What nationality will have altered this car?
Second: it doesn’t matter.
Cosmic greetings!
stupid man on earth – where do you see that germany has 70 countries? and we have 80million habitant … stupid americans or whatsoever ..
.. nevertheless .. stupid ford or car mechanican .. nations are always stupid
Denmark = DK i think
For some reason my head is filled with images of ladders and barrels.
I am so happy: my head is containing a wonderfull brain
no. DK is for Donkey Kong.
anyone notice the plate says lol with lots of imagination?
Denmark is “DK”
It’s Germany indeed, the L stands for Leipzig (east German city). If that’s however hubas indication for stupidity, than I still feel pretty comfortable being German.
then…
You are right
i live in that city >_<
i wont be soo proud if i were you
I am sooo proud that I can differentiate between “wont” and “wouldn’t”
I am wont to use a language in a sophisticated manner
Me too (;
Denmark’s plate is DK. How i know? I’m danish myself.
Ford is a german brand.
Since when was Ford not an American brand…?
Denmark is DK
why do you have to be racesct…
It’s not actually a licence plate. It’s a vehicle registration mark. The licence part of it is the sticky tax marks on the plate and the tax disc inside.
you wasted a pifectly good first comment
o ya
************
FIRST!!!!!!!!!!
************
FIRST!!!!!!!!!
stupid comment
thats an american car =P
notice that the van is a ford, so I guess it would be stupid Americans
this van was build in europe. and whats more ford was set up by a man from cork in ireland
The Ford Transit is not available in America, we have the Ford E-series.
stupid idiot
Stupid EASTERN Germans.
well, where are u from `?
Ummmmm, why stupid?? A Ford Transit rear window can cost in excess of 400€! A selfmade panel, as shown here maybe 25€. The repairer needed to do this so that he didnt need to remove the wiper motor and drive unit………so who is stupid now?
Ehhhhh not that funny, BAWSEEEE!!!
Stupid transitions
License plate WIN –> LOL
WIN –> DOWLESS
Sometimes I Wonder Why.
Sometimes I Wonder Woman.
Sometimes I *SQUEEZE!*
*brings coconut milk and rum*
Pirate van.
“If this van be arrrr-rockin’ don’t come a-pillagin’”?
Clickie for pirate vans.
That explains the wiper blade…parrot droppings.
Why are pirates called pirates?
Cos they arrrrrrr!
kind of makes you wonder why he had it on
Maybe he confused the wiper switch with the laser blaster or missile launcher switch. Happens to me all the time.
*gets into LCB’s car*
*sees all the shiny buttons*
Ooooh…what does this one doooOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAaaaahhhh…..
*lands in a faceplant on a red carpet*
WHY did they put the ejector seat button so close to the radio dial???
Yay! Dragon’s here. How’s the scribbling?
I KNOW! Stupid auto industry. I’ve learned the hard way not to change the station when I’m going through a tunnel.
Eeeeww…. Is that why you always wear the mask now?
“Mask”?
Your avatar is wearing a mask.
Or what *looks* like a mask, to the untrained eye.
*takes off glasses*
*looks*
*puts glasses back on*
Yep, must be my lack of training….
Maybe it’s mascara.
No. Maracas. I just have real poor hand-eye coordination.
Spoken like someone who’s never been ejected from a car seat in the middle of a tunnel when the radio started playing a Brittney Spears song.
Would the point be clearer if I said a Black Eyed Peas song?
But wouldn’t you WANT to self eject at that point anyways?
Yes, but those tunnels have awfully low, not to mention hard, ceilings.
Well still, wouldn’t that be better than enduring either “songs”?
the lesser of two heavals, yes.
Either way you’re going to hurl.
Earl is going to feel slighted when he hears that.
Not to mention Ralph.
Oh, dang. I mentioned him.
I just saw Ralph talking on the giant white telephone!
Poor Ralph, always calling on dinosaurs……
Is he still driving that bus?
To the moon.
No, his contract was up. Chuck took over for him.
It looks good but to my untrained eye it looks like my little pony LOL.
LoL
LöL
Yay Umlaut!
Lümmel!
Ströké öf géniüs théré Arthür!
Thânk yöû.
I AM NOT! HOSENSCHEISSER!
Just wanted to give you another umlaut. *pouts*
(Blödian!)
*googles Lümmel”
noun
1. lout
2. oaf
3. boor
4. willie
….Willie???
Err… yes, that töö.
That’s what it means in Dutch, except we don’t bother with the umlaut.
OH! Well thank you then!
(Blödian????? Gesülze!)
You’re welcome.
(Nö.)
I think we’ve reached diacritical mass.
Does anybody want a Löwenbräu and a Leberkäse?
We can also play some music, Mötörhead for example is a good choice.
Be aware of Doppelgängers!
How about some Die Ärzte?
*still wonders who “Mötörhead” might be*
Spééd métäl bänd.
Are they related to Motörhead?
No. Completely different.
They normally cover Guildo Horn and Modern Talking.
*isn’t sure if Americans ever heard about Guildo Horn*
*hopes not*
*never has*
*is relieved*
*squeezes good bye*
See ya Arthur. I hope you’re feeling better.
*SQUEEEZE!*
Bye!
Be good Arthur. As my Grandpa would say, “if you can’t be good, be good at it.”
Kind of like how Primus covers The Residents – like all the time.
*takes Sharpie from sock, starts connecting all the dots*
*reads between the lines*
Ooh! A horsie!
…Or is it a moth? I can never keep those two straight.
Then stay the hell out of my closet!
Well…? Is it a message from outer space?
Nope, Guam. ‘Bout the same thing though.
I LOVE leberkaese!
(umlauts are way beyond my keyboard skills)
Hehehe. Mitchell gets around, hey?
I like me some provedores.
Huh, if you get to a picture early enough the visible comments are actually relevant, as opposed to people using this space as their personal chat room.
LIES
I’m not sure what you mean. Why don’t we chat about it?
How ‘ya been?
Doing great! Just lying around, warming my belly-fur in the sun.
Nice day for it.
*sigh*
My cat just barfed on the rug.
Nice day for it.
My comment on the gnome lol finally passed moderation, so I guess my dual citizenship has been approved.
Woohoo!!
I mean…nice day for it.
Do we need a passport? I mean, I don’t speak the language.
You don’t need to speak lolspeak. The only rule is to play nice. And don’t play ball in the house. Oh, and don’t talk about lolcat club.
*sigh*
Amongst are rule are…
Make that:
Amongst our rules are…
Stupid brain fail.
*is caught playing with the nice ball in the lolcat club*
*grabs ball and flees*
WOOOOHOOOhoooooo…!!
Can we push all the stuffing up one end of the cushions?
Ok. I found a list of rules apart from those mentioned. I could un-translate them from lolspeak, but a) I don’t feel like it and 2) it’s lolspeak-lite so you can handle it anyways.
“Any kitteh forgets hims number spends a night in teh box.
Any kitteh loses hims mouse spends a night in teh box.
Any kitteh playing grab-tushie or fighting in teh quilting spends a night in teh box.
Any kitteh not in hims bunk at eight spends teh night in teh box.
Any kitteh caught smoking in teh prone position in bed spends a night in teh box.
You get two sheets. Every Caturday, you put teh clean sheet on teh top, teh top sheet on teh bottom, and teh bottom sheet you turn in to teh YNLB. Any kitteh turns in teh rong sheet spends a night in teh box.
Any kitteh with dirty pants on sitting on teh bunks spends a night in teh box.
Any kitteh don’t bring back hims empty pop bottle spends a night in teh box.
Any kitteh loud meowing spends a night in teh box.”
Uh oh. We play grab-tushie a LOT here. Plus I goosed someone last night over there!!
NOOOOOO I DON’T WANNA SPEND A NIGHT IN THE BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOX!!!
What’s the “forgets hims numbers”?
Oh, right. We started recording that after the spiel had started. Here it is from the beginning:
“Them furs got laundry numbers on them. You remember your number and always wear the ones that has your number. Any kitty forgets his number spends a night in the box.”
Me neither, but it’s a nice day to learn…
Yep! A nice day for it.
Are there invisible comments?
There are more, but you can’t see them.
Where? Where are they? I must know!
So in other words you hate failblog.
Sic transit gloria mundi.
In a Ford?
I was sick in a ford once…
Were you pinin’ for the fords…?
I was feeling blue tho
Were you talking with Slartibartfast and Ford Prefect about coastlines?
oh those are SO difficult!
It’s the little parts. I particularly enjoy the fjords.
Did you get sick on Gloria? I’ll bet that’s why she ended up taking another form of transit.
When the school bus broke down it was sick transport, glorious Monday
Latin puns….??
I…I think I love you.
*throws arms around annipuss and sobs with joy at finding another language dork*
What am I? Chapped liver?
Need crackers to go with that?
No, but some ointment or unguent might be helpful.
We have some BaconLube around here somewhere… Lemme find it.
The vicar went that-a-way. →
*grabs LCB and pulls her into the squeeze*
*gives her some chapstick for her liver*
*squeeze*
Um, it’s a little hard to reach the liver from here. A little help?
I should add that it’s been that way since I had my gallbladder divided into three parts.
(see what I did there? see? see?)
Very humourous!
Did they delete that cartilage?
Dr. Cato did, yes.
I’m not a pro basketball fan, myself, but I do know some people that reserve their bile for the Celtics.
I hear they in’duct them at an early age.
*hands catburglar some chapstick*
That’ll help your chapped liver.
sorry DW – thought I was faster than I was…
Wow! It’s wonderful to have such intelligent and funny new friends around.
*sees LCB, is reminded that worldly things are fleeting*
What…? What do you mean by worldly…wait…
*looks at hands, feels earlobes*
DAMMIT!!
*runs after LCB*
HEY! somebody took my contact!
Reminds me of that Micheal Jackson song “Black or white.”
You’re wrong Rait, this is a chat room, fail blog is that way, just walk over the cliff, into the rocks at the bottom
its the thought that counts.
the back of it says lol wich is how i feel
theres a very unfunny reason for this “fail” – they boarded up a smashed rear door window, get over it
I’D SAY THIS IS YET ANOTHER PATHETIC FAILBLOG FAIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But then again, you always say that and no one cares.
*checks the care-o-meter*
…nope…nothing…
Are you sure it’s plugged in? Have you tried to reboot? That isn’t the Acme Care-O-Meter Mark IV, is it? Those things never work.
Oh shit! IT IS the Mark IV! And I didn’t even buy it with the warrantee!
Fakey, I ran out of give-a-damn about 2 pm Friday and I keep forgetting to stop and pick up more….. Enjoy your turrets though.
Who is this “Fakey” to whom you refer?
The good Mr. Fakerton who started this little discussion.
Oh! Dumb me.
I’d lend you some Give-a-Crap, but I’m not sure you’d want to waste it on this guy.
*sniff sniff*
I think your Give-a-Crap has gone bad. It smells awful
We here at the Give-a-Crap foundation find those who complain needlessly about Failblog and beat them senselessly.
Give-a-Crap: Who gives a crap? We do!
No, no, that’s how you know it’s working.
Do I have to give a crap – or can I just sling it like a naughty monkey?
I suppose if you warned them you could expect a reasonable effort to catch it. You wouldn’t have to actually hand it to them.
Can you put it in a paper bag and leave it on their doorstep? You would have to keep it warm somehow, though.
*ponders possibilities while fiddling with lighter*
*looks at LCB’s lighter and giggles*
How…quaint!
Yeah, I know. The flamethrower on my car is on the fritz.
It may be easier to think if you do your fiddling on a fiddle.
I think we should serve up some PUdding.
you fail
At least they keep it clean.
yes, that’s germany. it’s leipzig xD
Moving city?
Errr… my guess:
Landsberg am Lech, Bayern
Nope. Leipzig.
yes… I´m a fool for not obswerving the rather large tax marks separating the L´s ! For this I shall now retire to a corner and feel shame for a humbling 5 minutes…
Anpu always said you shouldn’t install wipers while hopelessly drunk.
maybe he replace it cause the glass broke as he died
haha the license sez LoL
Mein Leibsch lobsch mer ^^
WIN. Cuz as do I.
The real fail lies in the fact that someone actually turned this wiper ON.
Uh-oh. Judging by the dark-ish clouds, looks like he’s going to need the wiper soon!
Oops. Didn’t see your comment, excuse that ↓↓.
I wonder how the van got that way in the first place.
At least a wiper lets you clean off the inevitable comments that get scrawled on the back of a white van.
Aaauuggghhh!!! Foiled again! I am incapable of scrawling messages outside the window area!
I love that the driver obviously used it.
He probably turned it on and went, “Oh, yeah…”
Alternatively, it could just start when the front ones go on.
*gooses Arthur*
*looks innocently up at the sky and whistles a jaunty tune*
*joins in*
What tune are we whistling?
*looks guilty*
*squeezes*
*gooses Arthur while he squeezes Dragon*
*goose-steps off*
*takes a gander at Arthur while *POUNCE!!*ing on the Admiral*
*falls down clutching Dragon*
*laughs himself silly*
Pfft. As if you weren’t silly already!
I thought there was only one too, but it looks like there is one on the right hand side, which I guess isnt much use for a german van with the driver being on the left, but they both come on together presumably.
*observes from a distance*
Chicken. :p
omnomnomnomnom
Rosemary and lemon juice marinade for 2 hours, then on the grill it goes. Yum.
Omg I would LOVE that right now! I haven’t eaten in sooooo long.
*stomach growls*
Hey, I won’t break that rule. I’ll let Emp do that.
Or Chaz.
*checks blood pressure*
*snickers*
He’ll learn, Admiral. After all, he has a respectable reason – the desire to know.
*snork* It’s okay, he’s not actually here at the moment.
The…rule?
…and I’m breaking it?
*shivers*
Hee…! No, not really. Arthur was just funnin’ you.
*nods*
YAAAY! =D
That’s an ass wiper
I bought one last week…gave me a bad rash…
D’oh, you forgot to apply the baconlube.
the van window is one way vision film – you can see through them from inside. privacy win
Maybe Stalker Sam bought this van and is in the process of converting it to a full stalker van.
I’m with you on this one Fluffy. It’s a stalker-van work in progress.
Little boy…would you like to come to my van and have some candy?
Okay, sir, you’re under arrest under the FailBlog Anti – Pedo act, Clause 23, Paragraph 56. Anything you say may be taken down and used as evidence against you.
*handcuffs Mudrock 1000*
15?
?
Nope! Half-past.
ȫ_ȭ “oōóǒòôõöøŏőœ”
*GROAN*
Now I have the Wiper Blade song stuck in my head…
I am afraid to ask, but… oh nevermind. I don’t want to know that song anyways.
♫ Sometimes you’re the windshield
Sometimes you’re the bug ♫
click & enjoy – the only song I know that has the word ‘fluid in it’
I like that the ‘fail window’ has been cleaned.
his license plate says LoL
No it doesn’t.
Actually, it says L8L.
LOL EPIC FAIL MWUHAHAHAHA
Its win if your a pedophile
It’s never a win if you’re a pedophile!
And what could possibly be the connection between this picture and a pedophile?
Anyone laughing at this comment is a FAIL in it self. This will be one of the only comments on Failblog that is deribelately intended NOT to be funny. O yes i see you guys chuckling, thinking about commenting FAIL on this comment, and afterwards thinking “o noes, the guy said i’m a fail in myself, maybe he’s right…. “. As this is comment is not funny, I would like to tell that German license plates are quite fun: I once saw a license plate in Aachen with AC DC **** on it. The AC is from Aachen. And this is cool, because ACDC has so many meanings!
I’ve got a picture on my phone with a license plate that says AC DC 75. With those dots in it like the ones on the picture.
This comment might not have been intended to be funny, but a comment that is not funny will not be seen as funny by the real failbloggers. The users who do.. Are Trolls, TROLLS I tell you!
And we definitly do not use lolspeak like ‘oh noes’
Hey dammit! I missed a character in my e-mail address!
wooaaa i subscribed to my own non-funny comment and WordPress didn’t notify me! I feel like putting my ear in a newspaper. I thought you ought to know that.
Rock ‘n roll keeps dragging me,
Where I don’t know and you can’t see,
Cities keep rolling by and by,
Twist my arm and sting my eye.
Watch me join the circus,
Watch me steal the show,
There ain’t no easy money,
There ain’t no easy road,
Buy me, pay me, wonder why we,
Stumble across the land,
Don’t fail for me, I can’t fail for you,
We start to understand.
Hey GV, you tricked me into reading more words than I am usually willing to look at here.
Hi, how is everyone’s weekend?
I’m going to bed now, I’ve got a sollicitation tomorrow..
Hello-Good-Goodbye-Goodluck!
Now is the time to say goodbye.
(Goodbye)
Now is the time to yield a sigh.
(Yield it, yield it)
Now is the time to wend our way-eee
Until we meet again-eee
Some sunny day.
Goodbye, goodbye, we’re leaving you, skiddlydye.
Goodbye, we wish a fond goodbye, fa-ta-ta-ta-ta, fa-ta-ta-ta.
Goodbye, goodbye, we’re leaving you, skiddlydum.
Goodbye, we wish a fond goodbye, la-la-ta-ta-ta.
La dah da, lah la la etc.
*sigh* oops
What’s wrong?
I didn’t double yield…
I don’t understand.
“Now is the time to yield a sigh.
(Yield it, yield it)”
Ooooooh….
I’m going to go to the corner now, and think about what I’ve done.
Nahhh, just take a spank’n and get it over with.
Okey dokey.
Hang on, I’m still 15. Isn’t what you suggest illegal?
15?
or
15 x 2?
or you just celebtated the 15th anniversary of your 5th birthday?
Besides it is ‘Anything Goes’ Sunday
Er, no. I’m 15 years of age.
Maybe you mean 50 and the whir of the roflcopter is making it ’sound’ like 15
Seriously, I’m 15. What’s wrong with me being 15? Is it how I speak here?
There is nothing wrong with being 15, you just seem WAY more intelligent than any of the 15 year olds I have ever interacted with, AND I assign voices to all the regulars and I gave you a 30ish male voice.
plus it’s fun to pick on you!
Well, I am half British, if that helps.
But, seriously, I naturally talk like this. I abhor using “LOL” or other weird Internet emoticons unless it’s a matter of life or death. Most of my friends speak like me as well. You’d be surprised how sophisticated the conversations are at my school.
r u call’n me ghetto?
*wonders what her voice sounds like in Jenny’s head*
DW sounds like Fran Drescher.
Just kidding, you have a female narrator style voice – smooth a little deep, and smiling.
Oh I can’t help but be curious.
Jimbo sounds like superman when there is kryptonite nearby. You have been sick for awhile now – are you going to… be ok?
Are you sure that was “No Lex” that he was saying?
Dr.B – I rarely claim that I am sure about anything.
*looks to see if I missed some clues*
John was always jealous that his cousin got the midas touch, and all he got was the regular ol’ metal touch.
Very nice Jenny! Bravo!
*claps*
*clunk! clunk! clunk!* Dang it.
I always thought of you as mercurial, DrB.
and all the other boys had to worry about was growing hair on their palms…
Did the Driver Died?
this makes me just want to suck on a big black dick until it ejaculates all down my throat and makes me vomit
It’s nice that it kinda looks like the RSS icon…
thats not a FAIL…is a RSS WIN!!!
Good ol’ North American engineering. .
*likes how LCB and the gang pawed the thread south of here! vvv*
“Good ‘nuf for government work…”
Notice it is on the LEFT side. Thank you.
And what is THAT supposed to mean?
I think this is the “if you look hard enough you can find anything” principal at work. Seems he doesn’t do well with his left hand. More than I wanted to know really.
*snork!*
I think you might be right!
This is a sinister conversation.
How gauche.
That’s a very adroite statement.
These aren’t the droits you are looking for.
Just sayin’ sayin’ little of im-port.
Such linguistic dexterity!
*link-s arm with the Admiral*
*mirrors sentiment with own gesture*
You seem to be very… dexterous.
Jinx, Avis! Buy me a Diet Rite Cola.
Contains no dextrose.
That’s just not right.
*checks the fridge*
There isn’t any left.
Look way in the back. There may be one just out of derecho.
I reject your chirality and substitute my own.
Okay. Just don’t be checking out my aft when I bend over, okay?
Okay, LBC…just don’t be checking out my aft when I’m bent over, okay?
*mutters*…stoopitmoderatorholdingmycommenthmph!
Gotta hand it to you; you are a worthy opponent. Bedtime for burglars now.
*waves with both hands*
A deux mains!
*serre!*
*sees LCB runningrealfast into the distance*
*signals “goodnight” with semaphore flags*
Sweets, look at the time stamps! You can buy ME one!
But I called it first. So there, nyah!
I don’t think it works like that.
Shake hands and make up.
Here…you can use my mascara and lipstick.
*offers hand*
*is glad she wears no jewelry*
It’s an ironic wiper.
did anyone notice the “LoL” in the picture?
So, other than that Mrs. Lincoln, how was the play?
this is a van from my hometown – LEIPZIG!
Duh you guys are stupid this is the original car… it’s American
omfg! its the rss feed logo!!!!111!!
I love how he has already tried using the wiper too
anybody notice it kinda says LoL next to the liscence plate?
It’s german and the “L” stand for “Leipzig” an big east german city.
I lived there a while ago.
and the second L stands for Lesbo?
lol @ the begining of the licence plate.
WTF
lmfao RSS symbol.
its a fake
Look at the license plate it says Lol!
I live in that city too…
It might look like LoL, but the ‘o’ is of course the crest of Saxony.
hmmm, bad engineering?