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Cheezburger Network Blog
I don’t know, seems like a good idea to me…
Agreed. The professor will probably tell you that it didn’t work, and to send it again. At the very least, this buys you time to finish. Honestly though, it’s not worth $3, I can do it myself for free. Just take a random photo or MP3 and rename it “report.doc”, and it won’t open in Word.
By George, I think we’ve found the fail! $3 plus shipping and handling for something you should be able to do yourself.
♪There’s a man without conviction
There’s a man who doesn’t know
How to make a file corruption
Fail to-morrow
Fail to-morrow♪
There’s a lady who’s sure
All that glitters is gold.
Paris Hilton?
I said lady.
lol
and she’s buying the stairway to heaven
offtopic:
r u guys about 2 sell this blog?
i might know someone interested… u know my email
*snerk* Right, because someone with the cash to buy out the ICHC franchise dealie, in whole or in part, would OF COURSE go through an agent/representative who considers comments in txtspk an appropriate form of business communication…
*Boom* Headshot haha
hah burn
Agreed. Anyone that will waste their money on something so simple deserves an Epic Fail
Yeah, but the solution is solid. It would just be a consumer fail to buy it.
Until it happens a few times and the professors figure out what’s going on. Then sending in a corrupted file is an automatic F.
A cunningly crafted macro virus could take care of your marks forever. I bet you could charge more for that than a few bucks.
Shipping and handling on a word doc? Internets are about to be expensive.
What song would you use though. Hmmm…
But what song would you use? Hmmm…
Schools Out. Alice Cooper.
Yup, used this technique with great success. Bought me the needed 6 hours to finish the damn thing.
Me too. Thank god for dumbass computers and profs.
I Agree. I think that’s a very smart idea. How can they penalize you if the file won’t open. That’s not your fault, and for all they know it could be their computer playing up. Well Done
Even if the file won’t open in word you can still use a simple text editor to view the contents of the file. Also if you professor tries it on two machines and they both say it’s corrupted that means it probably came from you corrupted. Use at your own risk.
haha i actually did this once, got an an extra day to write my paper
Unless they open the file and see the MP3 MIME tag…better off using a doc file and really mashing it up.
Just make sure that it is approximately the same file size as a paper of the required length would be.
Wouldn’t work, if the professor was clever at all. Plenty of tools that can analyze a file and tell exactly what type it is. Even opening a file in notepad can let you read some of the cleartext headers
Try it, go open a mp3 in notepad, you’ll see a bunch of info stored in cleartext on the first line. ID3 tag info, encoder info and more. Which would pop up if you tried to pass it as a corrupt file.
total win
Until they make everyone do it by hand and mark it themselves, that is.
haha… well, I guess that’s the additional function of turnitin LOL
Plus shipping and handling, but wait there’s more!!
The first 100 senders get a free lifetime supply of ShamWoW!!!!
Beat-up hookers included?
You can fix the hookers with Mighty Mend-It!!
Is a beat-up hooker an adult equivalent to Tickle-Me Elmo?
Yes, only Elmo doesn’t ask for money first and press charges later.
But he should.
If he did do you have any idea how many registered sex-offenders would be listed on Sesame Street?!?!?
Yes. Seven. (Error margin +/- 7)
How many non-registered?
All of the rest of the cast?
You left out The Count’s maniacal laugh and thunder…
No, its no fun when the hookers laugh. Crying and begging are the only satisfactory results. Whimpering is acceptable.
Bite your tongue!
That costs extra.
Wait, so X-Phile is the hooker?
I’m not saying I’m above it, but in this case, no.
“It sounded good at the time.”
^reference fail^
*facepalm*
*headdesk*
*bukkit*
I think we have our first episode.
No, no, lil Crow! No bukkit. I *snerked* out loud (if that counts toward achieving bukkitlessness …
)
Well that does make me feel a little bit less embarrassed, thanks!
But if I mended it, where would I put my &*$^?
Well if you accidenty the wrong parts, you could always use the New DualSaw, it cuts in both forward and reverse for a straight line every time!!
Then, just flip the head around for the sanding mode and smooth out those rough edges!
Well, whatever happens, you’re gonna love my nuts!
(Morning all! *big squeezes*)
Foop!
*squeeze*
Your nuts are the best! Not that I’ve tried all that many.
Spaghetti, Linguini, Martini, Bikini.
Mornin’ Foop *SQUEEZE*
Who is this Foop you are all talking to? Maybe One Swell footh knows.
(Good morning all!)
Ther footh here, forethooth.
Gives czuhc a *thqueeth*
As a preventive measure, designed to forego 500,000 repetitions, notice is hereby given of “Good Morning” or other applicable greeting, determined by time of day encountered by recipient, and big *squeeze*, *smooch*, *hug* or *butt slap*. The aformentioned greeting process should be interpreted as extending to all Failbloggers, Failblogians, and Failblogovites encountered during this session.
Does that include Failbloggettes as well? *scuffles toe in dirt* Just askin’ …
Of course, sweetie. Wouldn’t want to run into a nasty discrimination suit.
If you do, she’d have to give pursuit.
Suitable reply.
Yeah, it fits.
It suits you, sir!
Aren’t suits brilliant?
As long as you have lots of space in them.
Just don’t be caught wearing hirsute! *squeezesjam*
Hirsute or no hirsute, either is suite.
*squeezes foop and hopes she’s not in her birthday suit*
Heavens, no! (But do you like my new tattoo?)
It says “Suite Pea”
Better than “EXREME”.
It’s a bit exreme for me but it is suitable if you want peeness.
Space!…Black! Black! You lock me in the cellar and feed me pins!
Black! Like the corners of my mind.
♫ Black in the saddle again ♫
Black In Back! Wait, no…
Suit you sir!
why doesn’t my facebook give me that
*facebook*
ow, that hurts more than *facepalm*
*vows to stick with facepalm when needed*
Better than napalm, too.
I love the smell of napalm in the morning.
(G’nite all *squeezes all around*)
Somebody’s been playing too much Grand Theft Auto…
wait… why would there be shipping and handling?
and ShamWoW is a name I used for a PSHE exersise to make a zit removal cream XD
First? AKA who cares.
Why not corrupt the file yourself? It’s easy.
This guy is probably lazy. This is why he didn’t write the paper or won’t corrupt the files himself
Plus, his check for $3.95 will probably bounce because he was too lazy to go deposit money in his account.
please don’t click my name (it sends me a virus)
Computer or sexually transmitted?
Both.
when i clicked it, it just sent me a bunch of crappy videos. i hope the virus works out better for you. i don’t even own a mac! (maybe that’s the problem?)
For some reason, I don’t believe that you’re telling the truth.
This would be the Chicago Politician method of paper writing.
first?
56k modem?
*snork*
I LOL’D!!
Seems like a snorklol.
*snorklol*
Ouch, that hurt my nose.
*snorklol*
Oh, ouch…
What? You didn’t learn your lesson watching X-Phile? You just had to try it yourself? If all of your friends jumped off the Brooklyn Bridge would you jump too?
You can learn all kinds of things not to do by watching me. I’m thinking of making my own TV show- “It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time”.
I do believe I would watch that. Just for educational purposes of course.
OH! I so know the theme song : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjMz9bN4D4c
From 0:33 to 0:53 If your interested I have a few HD video cameras and lots of theater equipment ( Tripods, Remote Controlled Booms, Professional Mics, And a shitload of lights)
*snorkle* TWO! (anybody who understands that reference receives 10,000 internets)
Can I request my 10,000 internets in 4 easy payments of 2,500 internets a month?
*ponders*
*rechecks Crow’s application for extended payout*
*continues pondering and waits for answer*
um, ok, if you get it right then.
I got nothin’, just wanted to know if payment plans were available.
Yeah, I’m out, too. Other than the Count from above-mentioned Sesame Street.
Awww … ok. When on vacation in Hawaii some years ago, I learned to snorkle. To clear the tube when you come up out of the water, we were taught to say “TWO!” I quickly learned that trying to be “cute,” and voice any other number, inevitably got me a nice, big mouthful of seawater. Of course, my immediate (and now correct) response was … P-TWOO!
*snorkle* TWO: Electric Boogalol
*sneaks in for a POB squeeze while I’m here*
This would make a good ad for Apple…
What a great idea!
In what way? In the way that you’re a tool?
cool
Wow. That is the best. solution. ever. Damn that really does lead to some cool excuses!
Or just use the old windows Vista excuse.
Combine that with the HP exuse and you’re saved!
(For those who don’t know, don’t purchase a HP laptop… Blue screens every week)
I’ve hap an HP note book for two years and its fine for me…
*Roundhouse kicks ‘p’ and makes it spin 540 degrees*
And don’t trust their “backup” when you wipe and reinitialize. It saves only certain files. Excel spreadsheets are not one of them, nor are VBScripts, Perl programs, Outlook OST and PST files, T-Bird databases…basically it saves like only 8 extensions.
HP x64 laptop + Vista Ultimate x64 = teh shitz.
HP x64 laptop + Vista Ultimate x64 = I’ve never had a problem with it for the 13+ months I’ve owned it.
Or corrupt it yourself.
(I always use a broken USB when time is not enough)
But who has time to introduce the file to cheap booze, fast cash, and easy women?
Because the chances of keeping your job when sending a corrupt file to your boss’ computer are really high. Definitely worth the 3,95$.
If you want to keep your job, send a corrupt file AND a picture of broken kneecaps.
kay, but how many pages of corrupt crap is that? cuz i need 25 pages for thursday! where’s the link?!?! and does it come with sources?
Will you need to credit FailBlog in the bibliography I wonder…
I have had professors who were so clueless, that I would just send them blank word documents when pressed for time, and then when they were unable to open them, I would say, “Oh, whoops — must have been a corrupted file,” and then get a time extension on the paper. It worked every time. Soooo really, college has done nothing for me, other than make me into a better con artist.
I always got my papers in on time, didn’t do me any good. i mean copy from one person and they call it plagarism, copy from lots and it’s called research. that argument never didn’t do me any good either.
my partner and i had to do a paper each for the same course once, i did mine but she had too much work on so, like the good guy i am, i did hers for her. i got 84% pass – she got 90%!!!! and i put less work into hers!!!!!
Would this have been an English paper by chance?
*snorklol*
Ouch, dammit.
>Would this have been an English paper by chance?
it was actually about “how does a teacher’s attutide to new technology affect his/her pupil’s ability to work with ICT?”
although it was in english.
I am an English teacher, however i do not always follow grammar rules or even bother with correcting spellings that much when on the internet. i cannot be bothered as i spend all day doing it for snotty little brats.
think about, if you will, an OBGYN not wanting to have sex very often – he doesn’t want to take his work home with him.
i also do not proof read my comments very much; i have just noticed the double negative (never didn’t). this was posted pre-coffee and not awake.
as i tell the kids at school, “double negatives are a no no”
And I hate those MLA-APA formats. Who gives a f**k? I had to settle for a C in english because of this.
(F**k Dr. Carey)
I’m mad now!!!
>:(
Or… Find out ur teachers operation system, and use something far too advanced for it, the teacher can’t tell you to do it again, and she cant give you any lower than an A, because she doesn’t know if you have mistakes… I’ve done this successfully before.
Uh… sure s/he can. (Tell you to do it over, AND give you something lower than an A.) Bonus, if the course syllabus tells you what format to submit the work in, and you submit something else, s/he can just give you a 0 and call it a day! Which is precisely what a friend of mine, an English professor, does – and precisely what I would do, too.
You might have gotten away with this thanks to a lazy, overworked, or disorganized teacher, but that doesn’t make it a valid approach.
If it works, it’s a valid approach. Being able to prey on the ignorance of your elders is a very important lesson to learn in college. Since it’s not likely we will remember anything actually taught by a professor.
Hitler approves
Then it’s gotta be a great idea. No, wait…
Hitler also approved attcking Russia. Just sayin’.
*pssst*
Hey kid, wanna buy an “a”? Come on, I got nothing but the best stuff here!
in the winter too
if you must learn anything from history, it’s dont invade Russia in the goddamn winter
Wait, are we talking Robo-Hitler or Zombie-Hitler?
cheese
Like a Rat does it? (Click my name for awesomeness)
I’m terrible with reasearch papers. I try to do the actual research but end up playing the Half-Life episodes or watching Amateur Asian Anal porn…or something. I suppose I should adopt new study habits.
Or take a class on Amateur Asian Anal porn – research’ll be a breeze!!
Haha I was seriously considering making a corrupt file and then realised I was better off just staying up all night to send in a crap assignment late.
Never worked for me. In my university, all courses that require online submission of assignment, if a corrupted file is submitted, a zero is awarded. No extension, no second chance after the deadline. Aside from losing mark for MLA/APA citation, marks is also deducted for not following strict font and page margin specifications.
sucks to be you, then.
In my university, you got keelhauled.
In my university, you got sent to watch a Sunderland match.
In my university, you got sent to watch an episode of “My mother the Car”.
Here in the US, the Constitution protects from cruel and unusual punishments.
I forgot to mention we had to wear a Toon top.
Why is Limbaugh legal then?
The Bush Admin. concidered it the same as water-boarding. so then its ok.
The constitution bans cruel and unusual punishments, not cruel and unusual people.
I think it would be funny to combine the two ads…take classes long distance and send corrupt files…
Oh, man, that’s hilarious! That’s genius! Wow, don’t look back now, Dane Cook, there’s a new rising star in comedy!
(I hope your sarcasm meters go to eleven.)
I used to do this all the time back in high school lol. In College, I’ve only had to do it once but it’s not a fail at all. It’s actually really funny to give the teacher the file and watch them try to open it and the solutions they come up with for trying to get it to work. “Maybe you accidentally did it in PowerPoint…?”
I’ve recently handed in my dissertation so I find this one very amusing. Can’t fail it. ^__^
I’ve totally done that before. In high school, there was a group project and they were like “Where’s your part of it?” So I took a JPEG, changed the filename, and manually changed the extension to .doc and opened it in Word. Predictably, it was a mess of strange characters. “Oh no!” I cried, “All my hard work is ruined!”
-__-
&then you wonder why people hated being your partner.
Take that teacher, trying to stress me out. How about I crash your computer. Sorry DW, not you of course, for you I would have started the project/paper years ago.
I have to agree.. this is pretty fool-proof idea; I had never thought of doing something like that before and now that I know about it- I’ll probably use it :-p
The thing that sucks though, is, I’m a Digital Media major; so all my profs know everything there is to know about computers. In fact, it wouldn’t surprise if they’ve used this excuse themselves, so they probably know to look for it. Ah, I suppose it could buy me time with my other profs though… while I’m actually putting effort (scary thought, I know!) into my major, I can just pass off the corrupt files to my english, science, history & social science professors.
(I’m actually thinking this through… that’s bad.)
no its the ” but two corrupted files for $5.00!!!”
Not bad, man.
I’ve done that before. He didn’t notice and I got a B. I’m honestly not sure if that’s a win or fail.
FAIL??? Obvious EPIC WIN!!!
Please give me a 5-paged report on why this is, in-fact, a win. The report is due tomorrow.
I find it easyer to send the corrupted file and “Boot and Nuke” hidden inside it (Boot and nuke = turn comp on, Everything is gone (the hard drive is wiped) more power ful than format)
i’d do it.
I’ve written a letter to daddy
how is this a fail?! seems more like an epic win to me! i would so totally do that, and for 3.95 it’s SO worth it! hurray for the slacker way out of an essay!
Tis is not a fail. This is a win for the advertiser. Think how much money they will make off people who don’t even know what a corrupted file is!
Sorry, i meant “this”
I have sent a corrupted file before. It gave me an extra day to finish my paper with no penalties.
Ok, I’m a professor. The corrupted file thing is a total crapshoot because sometimes I open files immediately and sometimes it takes me a week to even think about opening a file! So you may get 10 extra minutes or you may get 7 days.
Of course I also grant extensions to anyone who asks, so you don’t need to resort to this crap.
That said, if you can’t make your own corrupted file you’ll be getting ripped off for most of your life by people smarter than you.
My students do this from time to time. As often as not, running the UNIX command “strings” on the file can extract enough text to show whether the source for the corrupted file has anything to do with the paper the student was supposed to be writing.
If they’re bullshitting me, it is indeed a FAIL (or perhaps a WIN for me). They generally only try that trick on me once…
FAIL? Man this is a WIN. Send the teacher a virus so that God Damn Son of a Bitch learns their lesson! No more assignemnts. MWAHAHAHA
anyone agree?
GENIUS!
You know what sucks? I actually take a Distance Learning Class(High School) at TTU, and I saw this and thought, “I saw nothing like this!” But I’m actually a Texas A&M Aggie, so I see this and think, “Yes!!! TTU Fails! My life has meaning again
!!”
Well this can be done for free…open up a word document in notepad and just delete a character and word won’t be able to open it ever again.
Education win
seems like a win to me
Sorry to break it to you kids, but as a university admin, we are on to this scam.
While it may have worked (and might still work at some universities), we are now in the know that this is yet another scam to try to buy you more time for your papers.
When we get these cases at our review board, the ownership of turning in a working file on time is now on the student. Try this at my university and you’ll find yourself with a nice fat 0.
Pretty much. You might as well just say that your dog ate your homework…
rofl.
I remember so many people doing it at high school.
they’re in for a nice suprise in college…proffesors don’t give a dam if it’s corrupted. just get a working one in on time!!!! rofl
btw you can make your own corrupted file or just a word document with weird ass characters.
Neva pay for this crap =0
I did this with a professor once but instead of a corrupted file i sent 2 gbites of virus infected gay porn lol and he gave me a A+ lol
wow that is actually not a bad idea…
tats should b a win!
i’ve done this soo many times ;D
This is pure win, no fail at all.