Submitted by Jimmy F
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muff are gud
You wonder why he’s an instructor? They say those who cannot do, teach.
He’s a certified cunning linguist.
I c wut u did thar
Does he speak with a forked tongue?
He can’t seem to get a handle on tongue and groove.
He muff not get enough one-on-one tutoring.
Even with a talented tutor, I’m not convinced loser-boy could get the problem licked!
If the teacher gave him a good tongue-lashing, maybe he would be hungry to learn more.
This one left a bad taste in my mouth.
Actually, if he’d just quit skipping the lab(ia) portion of the class … His partner is doing all the work by herself.
Did he pass the oral exam?
Nope, but the guy on the next fail aced braille.
I WANT THAT SHIRT!!!
and those who can’t teach – consult
LOLOL
he is certified
This is seriously disgusting.
It’s also scary that he procreated.
if i seem clueless, i am because what does this mean?
It’s ok he’s not her father
Yeah, you cannot become a father by mu** diving alone.
uhh, what’s “muff diving”?
………………..You don’t wanna know.
you could have learned the definition by typing 2 less words into google.
And BTW….. Considering I haven’t seen a chick with a muff since 1987, should it still be called muff diving???
failed a diving head first.
this sickens me, because you’re right
This asshat’s probably just a w@nker. What I hate is that they seem to then teach otherwise perfectly fine kids to grow into w@nkers through modelled behavior. Grrrr.
Hey; kid’s have to learn sometime, right? Seriously though; how hard can it be to dress appropriately around your kids?
I’m guessing that wearing a shirt, even that shirt, is a step up for this man.
I bet he’s that manscaped dude from a few weeks back – he’s just cum around AGAIN.
I don’t think it’s the same guy – I think it’s his accumplice.
Hell, we’ll need to cummission a hitman to keep their numbers down! (or go full-tilt at some sensible social policy)
*gets duct tape, cutting torch, shovel and pliers*
Okay, I’m ready!
Don’t forget the car battery and wire. This dude just shamed eveyone not only in his family but every decent person within five miles of him. Tact fail.
You expect me to carry all that? Well, I never! I’m a proper lady! A gentleman would at least carry the car battery.
Good point. I’ll bring the battery.
If I ever saw a guy wearing that, I’d slap the taste out of his mouth. Yes, that taste.
It’s ok for drunk college dudes to be wearing that, but once you have children you need to do some growing up.
Even then. A lack of class to that degree needs to be whacked out of people before they turn into some of the other FAILS we’ve seen here.
On the one hand, displaying that shirt should demonstrate to any sane female that he is NOT parenting material. On the other hand, he must have got her really, really drunk. Or she’s really, really dumb.
What the hell hath you done to your name?
No, fury-eal, I’m serious. 
Do you not approve of her new handle?
As long as she doesn’t spout off to me.
Ummm. Here here?
There? It sure is getting steamy in here.
*whistles*
Morning Sugar! *squeeze*
Awww! *squeeze* That brought two lumps to my throat.
Tea hee! *group squeeze*
I like a bit of sugar in the mornings!
*thread squeeze*
refresh, GAH!
You should refresh yourself with a cuppa :p
You bring the teabags!
I hope you’ve more than one cup
One girl, many cups! That’s just a sweetener.
*hiccups*
Cheerio, all! Sweets to the sweet!
Shreddies! Sugar to my honey!
Frosties! It cold out there, sugar.
Cereally wanted to milk another pun out of this run and *squeeze* the whole thread like jam did, but you’re knot here anymore.
*waves and hopes to see everyone soon*
Nice hope work! She SNAPS! her fingers, the blog CRACKLES! into life, and up a new fail POPS!
I got really tired of hearing, ‘for Sega’. Oooh should I change it back? VOTING TIME!!! And no recounts! For the name-change can be demo’s and anti can be repubs haha!
I bet he dived right in to the lessons…
This a WIN!
Pedophile WIN!!!
Pedophilia is never a WIN.
How would you know?
BFF, Blog Ninja, Rian… this one you can have, with relish.
Skip the relish and go straight to pepper spray.
That would be refreshing; maybe a side of mustard gas?
*Ahem* Sorry, did not mean to imply that I could confer permssion to do anything, to anybody; nor does BFF or Blog Ninja need instruction. *squeeze.* I meant Rian and who(m?) ever else is new and overly ambitious with their slaying of the trolls. Also, I am very tired.
S’ok, SC, I understood your intent. *also very tired* I would bet others did too.
Thanks, ƒ∞þ. Sometimes I wonder about myself, but then… I don’t worry about a thing ’cause every little thing is gonna be alright.
Don’t worry, be happy
*blames Mookie for that*
…I think it’s great that people are continuing their education.
Why did he ever wear that in public with his daughter.. i can’t know. sick..
what scares me about this photo is i know someone like this, and it isn’t the person in the picture O_O besides, there seems to be a mom in a picture what is SHE thinking???
“Certifies muff diving instructor, my foot. His brother is much better”.
“I’m so glad these aren’t really his kids”.
that’s a fairly common scuba club kinda shirt… he’s not being a college guy or a pedo
…though i wouldn’t wear it out on anything but a stag party bar crawl either. full daylight with a kid in tow? bit much.
Where it does fail is incorrect use of international naval flags for signifying “diver in the water”, but that’s endemic to the entirety of USA divers.
That is the only fail you can see in this picture?
no, it’s merely additional fail, and one not limited to that guy
Great comments! ITA about that definitely being the wrong venue in which to wear that shirt! What was he thinking??
Mother fail also
What mother would let their husband wear that shirt out with their daughter! There is no respect there, I bet it will be a funny picture to look back on when their daughter is working the stripper pole…
you mean when the daughter takes over Mom’s stripper pole? It’s a family affair!
True.
Or share with the sister?
that shirt is epic!
Nah, just epi. But I’ll let you pic.
Comments like these make me wonder if eugenics wouldn’t be a bad thing after all…
Add a bit of chlorine to the gene pool?
um.. this is going to sound stupid but what is a muff?
Not stupid at all if you seriously don’t know. One needs to be familiar with certain slang words. This is a cute little word for a lady’s cute little um.. you know –> (|) (Too graphic?) (If I have failed to realize you were being sarcastic, please ignore this response entirely.) Thank you for your kind attention. Carry on!
*toe-dirt* Ummm foopy? I don’t know either, and I don’t really understand your graphic, there ^. Is it like that? *points*
(_)_) <– That might be seen as a bum, or rear view of said lady.
Were she naked, at approximately the same level, this (|) is similar to what one might see. See? *same disclaimer ref sarcasm as above, if applicable*
Ummm…so muff diving is like this *CENSORED* then, babe?
Posilipply, doll.
And though it is a moot point now, I meant to say “what one might see from the front view.” But, by golly, I think it’s no longer quite the mystery it was before. *skips off to grab a beverage* Anyone else, while I’m up?
Got any more of that nectar, honey?
Just what kind of girl do you think I am, DrBee? *runs and hives*
*waxes and dives!*
(if she hadn’t buzzed-off!)
*all aflutter*
*tries to look buzzy but calm*
*wings it*
*likes this comb’ination*
so ear muff means ear v@gin@??
i think that symbol is specifically ‘hotpants’
“Gathering my mantle about me, and sheltering my hands in my muff, I did not feel the cold.”
-Charlote Bronte’s ‘JANE EYRE’
no i completely didn’t know what a muff is and i appreciate ur expanation
thank you very much
You are very welcome.
No joke, it is a maryland underwater fire fighter.
I am dead serious with this, and yes, they do know.
Could somebody please explain to non-native speaker like me what a muff diver is? According to everybody’s comments here I can only deduce it has a sexual reference.
Urban dictionary 101 class is that way! —>
Just so they don’t get lost and pop into the lolspeak class … no telling what they might think a ‘muff’ is after that! (Nice to see you, Miss Jam – *squeeze*)
I had a pair of ear muffs once. I can be excused for it though, it was the 80′s.
*squeezes the foop*
hot, girl on girl *reaches for camera phone*
…aaaaaaannnnd…one small shove, and he overbalances over the edge. Byeeeeeeeeee…
A muff is slang for a woman’s private parts.
A diver is someone going head-first into something, such as a swimmer entering the water.
You do the math.
Eleventeen?
Ah, now it makes sense to me. Thx!
Learning something new every day, although I’m sure I’m never gonna use muff (the noun of course
).
woulda thought the pictogram in the middle of the flag would be explanation enough…. but yknow, GIYF
ULULULULULULULLULUULULLU
LAWL
ROFORFLFRLORFLOFRLOFRLOFRLORFLFORLORFLOFLROFLORLFOFLORL
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111one
*bites lip*
*loans Sidhe a Chapstick for that poor lil lip* I am right with you. ow
Oooh! Cherry flavo(u)r; my fav! (Hi, šWε└∟ ƒ∞þ! Nice to *squeeze* ya!
)
>^._.^< <— (just for you – a portrait of my boy, "Fabio"
And nice to *squeeze* you too!
Awwww! Thanks!
I have 7 little fuzz-butts, myself. 
*muffled response*
*RUFL*
Do you feel alright? It looks like you may have had a spas attack on your keyboard with the shift key held down.
*whispers* I think you’re right about the shift key thing GV. *squeeze*
p.s. Been meaning to ask … does one pronounce Patrica (Pah-trick-ah)? Without the “i” in there towards the finish, I’m not so sure. Well, anyway, this is what it sounds like when I say it in my head. *hates the echo effect in there, though, so tries to keep the volume low*
Sorry, I scurried away shortly before your post! Patrica is pronounced (Pah-tris-sah) to answer your question. Sorry for the delay!
Here’s a *squeeze* hello! And another *squeeze* for finding my silly question and taking the time to answer. You’re just the bee’s knees!
This looks like a serious case…
I shall prepare to cleanse it with fire!
Anyone wanna join me?
õ_õ
I think this might actually be an edited photo. Either that or he has a square sticking out of his back or something. Look closely at the bottom of the ‘R’ at the end of ‘INSTRUCTOR’.
I think problem started when you started “thinking”. I kid I kid! Your cool man.
nope. without wanting to sound like a stuck record, nip into a dive shop some time and check out the dry-land apparel
Hey I cant be mad at this guy. Thanks to him and guys like him the world will never run short of strippers. Yay!
Good morning all.
Would you rather him go around teaching while not certified?
Good point, but a T-shirt alone does not prove that he is actually certified. I wonder if he got a master’s degree in it.
best comment this thread, lol
I fail at seeing the fail here. Is it because he has a cowboy hat?
I’m guessing they’re at some automobile racing event where that kind of shirt would be appropriate. Along with, Federal Boobie Inspector and Big Johnson…
And my favorite, “I’m not a gynecologist, but I’ll take a look” which is usually worn by one of the grossest guys you’ll ever have the misfortune of meeting.
$20 says this guy picked this shirt up at Goodwill and has no idea what it means!
Dad?
LMAO, You might be a redneck if……. ROTFL
RT
http://www.online-privacy.vze.com
nice PS job
I’m thinking the fact that he has two daughters, and is able to keep his wife happy enough to want to stay with him makes his a certified “diver.”
Practical Sex Ed FTW!
Why do I get the feeling this picture and the one above it (Carnival Ride Fail) were taken at the same place?
I was thinking the same thing, lol!
At least it was clean.
… and so was the shirt.
I know it’s wrong on more than one level, but maybe he’s going to teach his darling girl how to muff dive when she gets older!
Why wait? The girls could practice on each other while he demonstrates on mom. It’s fun for the whole family… and educational too!
While that comment was a little funny, it was more than a little creepy/brain damaged/disgusting.
I certainly hope that lil’ girl is his ‘diving’ partner. Lucky guy…..
why can’t people with kids wear offensive t-shirts? this is a lame excuse for a fail.
If this was taken in Britain then that guy would be on the ‘pedo’ list by now.
You may be interested to know that there is a Muff in Co. Donegal, Ireland. Friends tell me that they have a diving school there but I’m pretty sure they’re taking the piss. They did teach me a new version of an old favorite though…
Well I’ve been a Muff diver for many a year
And I spent all me money on Muff diving gear
Goggles and swimsuits and flippers galore
But never I’ll play the Muff diver no more!
ahem
you should know better than that divers can’t resist a good sexually related joke, even going so far as to move to the town then set up a club, even if the area turns out to be crap for scuba sights.
http://www.muffdivingclub.ie/
3000th voter. lol, I’d like to see her future boyfriend come to their house wearing that.
lmao that would be epic
Poor girl…Talk about embarrassing, though obviously she’s too young to notice…
Isn’t that Garth Brookes?
Wow. Wear that not with the kiddies around
I wonder if he caught any shit for that
man-FAIL!