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Cheezburger Network Blog
*Stands ready for any troll to yell first*
What if someone yells first, but isn’t a troll?
The universe will collapse!
That’s a damn troll thing to say.
That’s a damn droll thing to say.
Dhat’s d damn droll ding today
dingeling?
Create your brute by going to keltai2.mybrute.com and fight miilions of players from all over the world
At once?
ORGY!
Where’s your friend THERE’S PONDER
Woo hoo! Hehe.
Troll can spell trolley!
t
tr
tro
trol
troll
trolle
trolley
Hooray, hoorah!
that’s an impossible question to answer. because only trolls yell FIRST
Doesn’t that depend on what they are yelling first to. I for one always yell first when free food is being handed out.
First!
After you!
Wow, just….wow. And you were spot on too, someone did yell first. Can I like, stab them or something?
*Gives Kiara a full range of weapons, from knives to blunt pencils*
first
Yaaaaaaa
FIRST
*Slashes stranger into three pieces*
*Wipes blade clean of troll blood.*
*Burns remains*
I see you are taking a more violent approach towards trollism
wow, lay off the runescape.
*sigh*
He’s new…he’ll learn.
When does K-12 start again?
Not soon enough…
*gentle squish*
August. It starts August 18, 2009. Not that I’m counting the days or anything. *hides the red sharpie and the calender*
Man.. it’s gonna be a long two months and 18 days…
sir rian stop kilingg evryonr who posts
U asked for it
We never ask, we just expect.
blah
Blah blah?
Ha blah blah blah, obviously!
Blah blah, card games, Blah.
Wow!
*Brings out sword and readies to attack other trolls*
*Thinks again.*
*Brings out Holy Hand Grenade*
“One.”
“Two.”
“Five, I mean three!” *tosses*
BOOOOOOM!!
*Brings out Holy Thompson machine gun.*
*Gunshots*
Haha, this gun shoots anti-troll rounds.
Dude…you have to stop attacking every person who posts. All who post are not trolls.
I can smell the caffeine on his breath from here, give it a few hours and he should calm down.
He was doing this yesterday, too…I think he needs an intervention.
Switch his Dr Pepper for pepsi, I hear you end up drinking 4 fewer cans per day that way.
That I would believe. Pepsi is nasty.
*high fives Avis*
Agreed!
Whereas Dr Pepper is so freaking sweet your brain makes you want to drink more thinking eventually it’ll quench your thirst. Can you tell I’m not fond of cola?
A while ago, I stopped drinking any type of soda in cans. Now I just mix natural fruit juice with sparkling water. MUCH better!
Hee! *smooch*
Hm… not a bad idea… *makes note*
I can’t drink soda anymore. Way too sweet. I guess I’ll just have to drink beer instead.
I don’t drink soda, myself. I don’t find any of them refreshing, and I’d much prefer to take in those calories in a more delightful way.
Got milk?
Noop…he won’t have that, either!
*checks to see that the fridge is well-stocked with honey nectar*
Sorry to interject but does anyone else find that cola burns the throat, well the CO2 that they add?
Like hellfire. Or bad orange juice.
So I am not the only one. I actually really enjoy drinking milk and can’t help but feel it has prevented a few broken bones.
Yeah, milk is nice, I go through a gallon in a couple of days. About the only reason I have to be mad about the economic crisis is the inflated milk prices.
*Is thankful he doesn’t pay for the amount of milk he consumes*
We, as a family, go through about 9 litres (liters) in about 3-4 days.
There is one soda drink which is refreshing, called Lemon & Paeroa. The drawback is that it’s not widely available outside New Zealand. Disturbingly, it was recently bought by Coca Cola but thankfully they’ve had to leave it alone as it’s NZ’s ‘national drink’. I lived there for 4 years and enjoyed L&P, now back in Blighty I miss it.
Trink coca (outhouse) cola
Trink?
It’s how trolls drink.
“Hey man we went trinking on the town last night!”
Sorta like that.
I see a flaw in your logic.
whose lo gic
It’s funny because the sign is actually displayed.
That’s funny. You’re funny.
It’s funny that it’s funny he’s funny because it’s funny the sign is displayed.
:/
I think it’s a very serious matter!
Har dee har har.
(Agah, I keep typing hard.)
No $hit, Funnyboi.
It’s his shtick…he only ever posts the obvious. Though we haven’t seen him around for a while!
And, the Moomin will be sorry he missed him.
Hee…! Thanks, sweetie, I couldn’t remember which of us is the one who likes him!
*makes a note of the post for the Moomin*
Oh.
That might be why I’ve never seen him.
He’s back!
Hey Funnyboi
blah blah blah!
What’s the point of the sign anyways?
Technically, I think it should just disappear because it has no purpose only to not exist.
*ponders*
Sometimes nobody makes sence.
˙ǝɔuǝs sǝʞɐɯ ʎpoqou sǝɯıʇǝɯos
Sometimes nobody spells sense right.
˙ʇɥƃıɹ ǝsuǝs sןןǝds ʎpoqou sǝɯıʇǝɯos
Somtimes nosebody smells scents right!
This thread is an assault to the sentence.
*Questions if it has become sentient*
To amuse the staff. Imagine all the confused customers you would get
It has directions on it. The smaller print says they have to scan it and put it BEHIND a different sort of display sign that they have to flip over. Clearly someone didn’t pass elementary school reading class.
i just orgasmed
*Stabs Holy sword into Matts chest*
*Kicks Matt in face*
*Laughs hysterically*
Woah, I better control myself here.
Here look at my link for advice against trolling
I’m thinking Rian needs to fall on his own sword…
Should we call him Damocles?
I was thinking more along the lines of Antony, but Damocles works just as well.
*sets the table for dinner*
I like Antony better. The whole pulling out his intestines so he’ll die faster thing would amuse me to no end.
So.. if he falls on his sword we’ll have sliced fruitcake?
Swordfish again?
Narwhal would you think that, Admiral?
Oh, I didn’t realize the gourd garden had produced a crop.
At least we’re not out of our gourds, then.
Dragonwriter, you made my day
Was it not brutus?
Aww, I see I’m sorry, I will stop the mindless killing.
I’ve sort of become a troll myself.
*Shudders*
That would be much appreciated.
Ok well, I have to go sorry Dragon.
Talk to you all later.
Who gives a SHIFT?
You ALT to.
I think you’re a bit out of CTRL.
CTRL+ALT+DEL!!!!
ALT+F4!!!
PWR OFF!
*turns power off and passes out*
PWR ON!!! *CLAP CLAP*
*turns power back on*
Did I miss something?
Nothing important.
I need to ESC these puns.
YOU HAVE NO CHANCE TO ESC MAKE YOUR TIME.
Take off every ZIG!!You know what you doing.Move ZIG.For great justice.
ALL YOU MONITOR ARE BELONG TO US.
What you say?
I can’t believe I participated in this.
Ctrl… alt… del… darnit!
Can somebody help me press the del button? *lets go of alt* Crap!
DEL we can do is listen.
INSERT computer pun here…
*observes the law of diminishing RETURNs*
*admires the INS and outs of the pun run*
Is this is END?
I’m so NUMb i feel LOCKed in place. I need a pause/break.
Screw this – I’m going Home.
What MODE of transportation will you be using?
F10 fighter plane is my chosen mode
Make sure you SHIFT gears.
Need a tissue?
He’s probably just flexible.
Why would they make a display sign that shouldn’t be displayed? They’re wasting paper and ink.
Have you ever worked in a store. There is nothing to do so you do anything that will look like you are doing work. Like putting up useless signs.
If you can read the fine print it’s an internal memo that some shipment won’t be arriving. Why this would exist in the form of a sign, who knows?
The internal memos at Target are printed on the same size papers that the signs are printed on.
It’s kind of a one size fits all deal,
You mean like a costume?
It has directions on it. The smaller print says they have to scan it and put it BEHIND a different sort of display sign that they have to flip over. They make it on big paper to try to get the attention of whoever puts the regular signs up. Clearly that didn’t work, which is why it’s a FAIL!
Or they wanted to post something up on FailBlog, and did this.
horsthorst
*Looks around at all the dead trolls*
*Walks away satisfied*
I’ll be back.
You forgot your sunglasses
Um…. who is going to clean up this mess? There are troll pieces everywhere.
Fine. Guess I’ll do it. *gets mop and bucket*
I’ll help! *grabs Shamwow*
Made in Germany. Beware of imitators.
What about swedish Scamnow
Whooops too late *zoink*
Maybe they’re just telling the customers not to display the sign. The store can do whatever it wants to with it.
*ponders what he would do with it*
*puts sign over hole in ground. Hides behind nearest rack and watches customers fall in*
*wonders what happened to “theresponder”?*
It’s cool Sir Rian, I would have kicked Matts head in a as well
I love how the first 100 or so comments never have SHIT to do with the picture you’re supposed to be commenting about. All starts with those dumbass noobs saying FIRST FIRST OMFG IM FIRST ITS LIKE AN ORGASM… WHAT’S AN ORGASM???
AAAANNNYYYWHO why the hell would sale signs have a back to them? For some reason, I think that either they think the employees are stupid (apparently they are) and they wanted to remind them of information about the sign and maybe its origin or… they wanted this to happen.
Sense of humor fail.
lmao
Inventory control/POS/some-such procedure required the barcode imprinted on the “attention” sign be scanned. The “attention” sign was to be placed behind the normal “value” sign, most likely as another procedural control. The value sign was printed on both sides to save money, and probably had the normal price on one side a sale price on the other.
I will feel relieved if this puts an end to the SHIT comments.
Dream on, sweet stuff.
looks like they should have hired you instead of the person who put the sign where it shouldn’t have been. Win for you! (unless it’s a complete insult to suggest you work retail.)
Honest work is no insult. That said, my brain is better suited to creating procedures than to following them.
burn
Can I just ask. Who has the right to call someone else a troll. There are trolls out there that do not believe THEY are a troll. THEY are not one of THOSE. So they go around calling others trolls. How can we know if we are a troll or not. I do not believe I am one but then again I could be misinformed
“who has the right”…sorry that sounded bad. I mean how do you know you are not a troll and then can therefore call others trolls
Existensialism crisis!
*roffles* To answer your question teisn, I am certain that most of the long-time posters here would consider that all this slash and hack garbage that’s going on is far more annoying than the occasional poster typing ‘blah’.
Amen, DrB.
*rolls eyes*
So basically the holy slayer of trolls idiot has violated basic dogma. Judge not, lest ye be not judged. FB has judged him, he is now a troll.
Easy Jimbo. He’s young, new, and wants to learn. Give him time.
Well, I see where I’m not wanted, I’ll just go back reading the comments, I just thought it was cool and you guys looked like you were having fun. Sorry for wasting your time.
Fruitcake-esque
Oh well
Hey, I didn’t say you’re a troll, because that would be me judging you. Which would make me a troll. Just saying, the consensus seems to be that your making a very troll-like bloody mess with all the hacking and slashing. More passive-aggressive, less actually being agressive. Nerds get nervous when someone gets more than passive-aggressive.
Yea I was just having a good time sorry, It isn’t just you I was just going to go back to reading the comments so that I wouldn’t start anything else.
At least you aren’t the “In Soviet Russia signs display YOU!” jackass. That idiot makes me want to kick puppies. I’m turning you loose on him…..
*hands Rian a shamwow, so he can clean up after himself.*
Look, rian, I know you really want to help us by killing all these trolls, but it does get a bit repetitive. I used to taze the trolls, until it got very cliched and annoying, so I stopped. So don’t worry, the only thing that’s stopping you is the slashing and hacking.
rian coming from anothre troll slayer just find a new wayto kill them
he is cool give him the benifit of the doubt
teisn, a troll is someone who deliberately tries to annoy and harrass others on the Web. They deserve the title as they know what is coming.
you are annoying me right now. does that make you a troll, too?
It does not make him a troll. We all have people we don’t like here, but we don’t go around insulting them or getting pissed off at them. You just ignore them and skip over their comments.
BFF’s comment wasn’t a deliberate attempt to annoy you. Logic fail.
So someone who is deliberately annoying is a troll, but someone who is not deliberately annoying is, well, just annoying. I get it now. Thank you.
You’ve got it alright.
Did you just call your BFF annoying?
*snorkroffle*
No…he didn’t.
making old people ’snorkroffle’ (whatever the hell that is) is fun!
That…that’s it?
You called me ‘old’?
Pfffffft.
*skips away to find a worthier opponent*
*high fives Dragon*
Just yell at him to get offa your lawn. That should work… .
*snorkruffle*
Just wow, you two down there are damn good. Admiral, I don’t think I have asked before, and if it is not offensive to inquire, what is your profession and what assisted you to become so eloquent with words?
They make dictionaries
*Hey Emperor!*
*Wonders how **hey Emperor** became an action*
How are you rian?
Action fail
Um… how do I make a down arrow? I’m such a n00b. In the good way, of course.
May fails bring jejune trolls.
Oh man…you’re gonna have to help me find my socks after that one. March to it!
July right there…I’ll be right back with the drinks. We’ll look for the socks in the morning.
You are an august man, Admiral…that’s a wonderful idea.
January about me. I can find my way back to you in the dark.
But there’s April-liant light to banish the darkness when we’re together.
The warmth we feel for each other has never diminished; Decembers of our passion burn strong.
Septembers sometimes go out, and our fire will last forever.
You are so strong, I imagined you leaving him pretty well destitute of a clue of how to respond.
And sometimes they just try to draw too much attention to themselves. We had someone who would comment obsessively and reply to each and every comment on the thread even if he had nothing to say. I don’t think he was being mean, he was just trying to get too much attention.
i have a bellybutton
You bragger!
Apparently dunno’s real name isn’t ‘Adam’.
Or Eve, come to that.
Oh my! That was an invitation out of the blue!
(…and yes, isn’t Eve! Could be Apple though?!?!)
*Braggart
*stabs*
Not again! I’m just always late when it’s troll-killing time.
*readies his holy battleaxe for another opportunity*
You can kill the next one!
Again?! *gets shamwow* You guys are so messy.
I HAVE 5 SNAKES, MANG!
bleb.
WOOHOOO I CAN POST AGAIN!!!!
*pours holy water on his battleaxe and cuts troll into four pieces*
Oh…Is it possible that I assaulted a non-troll individual? If that’s the case, it was accidental.
You’re in four pieces and you can still talk? How?!
the shamwows how
zomg that was a joke. and it was funny. damn i earn a gold medal n sh*t. alright take it easy. ****.
The hacking and slashing has to stop.
i missed you all so much
We didnt miss you
Well…I did.
Stop your belly-aching. These irrational feelings for him are not neccesary in a time of war. Stop being a Ninny.
I wouldn’t call DrB a ninny if I were you.
Well i am commander and chief of my own anus, tyvm
A blessing for us all, I’m sure you’d agree!
Yes, because if any one else commanded my asshole the world would surely implode.
Maybe they just didn’t know how to do it properly?
Seems they made his asshole the most prominent thing about him. Cheeky, yes, I know.
My pubes are the color of feces
well thats… nice?
Quite.
i died my mine pink and purple to get the attention of wild kangaroos
Did it work?
I think they might have carried him away to the wild kangaroo boxing rings.
Is this something new? Or were they always that color?
Mine just got spray-painted to look like Charlton Heston’s face with every detail.
That’s terrifying! I’m going to have nightmares.
udd finds this funny
Alice says udd should stop referring to ?self in 3rd person.
udd will shut the udd up
If you think that you’re a fub, reply to this post.
What does fub mean?
Frequently Used Badger
No, it means Flatulence Understanding Boobs.
Farting Uranium Bombs.
F***ed Up B****.
I just had a wayne’s world flashback. A sphincter says what?
FUBU without the U. – . – .i fock other men.. v.
Ahem, sorry i’ll stop I just think that it is fun.
*Sits at computer like normal person would.*
Nobody cares about your LIFE STORY! This area SHOULD be for comments about the picture so find a real message board to go spam on and leave the quality sites alone moron.
This is a humo(u)r site. Most of us choose to make this area a jovial environment for all to enjoy.
*deletes comment*
This time yours was the much nicer comment. I’m glad you posted before I did.
It happens occasionally.
*looks around the store…*
*smooch*
I’ll meet you by the bed linens later.
Ooooh…the 400-count Egyptian cotton ones! It’s a date.
*smooch*
I’m here, where’s my serpent of old Nile?
yes, humor related to the picture. I wonder why they even have this section for comments since nobody seems to be able to control their ADD. It turns into the only occasionally funny spam about nothing and the quite seldomly funny grammar failures. This is one of the first few images I’ve bothered to comment on and to read the comments that were already posted. I must say, I’m pretty disappointed so far. Apparently I should be going elsewhere to find witty comments on ridiculous pictures. I s’pose I’ve vastly overestimated this site.
See ya then! Don’t let the door hit you on the way out! *birdie*
Bye everyone!
Guess I’ll get on later.
*waves*
No one cares.
^F+you’s comment was uncalled for.
Let’s party.
*hands red plastic cup to Mr. Rogers and turns up the music*
Well that’s what you get for hiring mostly people who don’t mind getting abused for $8 per hour.
$8? You’re giving them the benefit of the doubt. Minimum wage isn’t quite at $8 yet.
Depends on where you are. Here in Washington (the state, not DC) minimum wage is $8.55 per hour.
In Ontario it is around 9.75
In Soviet Russia signs display YOU!
*Stabs*
*uses ShamWow to clean up*
I didn’t go into detail this time just a stab.
Well I’m going to go to work. have a great day everybody I promise I will change myself.
Oh and I was hired by Jimbo for that one ^ so don’t kill me please, bye all!
*waves*
Lol I acually have a shamwow. Signed by Billy Maze. Trues!
That’s zorbees!
And it’s Billy Mays.
You’ve seen the signature on his ShamWow?
*ROFFLE!*
wouldn’t the marker just be absorbed buy the magic of the ShamWow… I also just realized its called Shamwow. Ironic no…?
*high fives Templar*
uh… Billy Mays doesn’t market the shamwow. only oxiclean and kaboom and zillions of other products.
Unwarranted violence solves nothing Squire Rian. Just smile and wave and fate will hit them with a bus..
At least they got it the right way up
“i thought it was opposite day..”
Test
AWESOME finally got it to work. Please continue. Sorry to slow you down. *sits back in chair*
This is not a failblog post
Please do not display this comment.
*puts comment behind fluffy’s comment*
This is not sparta. (You lie, I lie.)
CLICK ON MY LINK =D!!!
Target Softlines Fail!!
haha, someone needs to get fired.
jeez, reading through these comments is like sitting in on an uber share circle! i’m glad we all got the chance to express our feelings on the issue of troll killings and such. hopefully these failblog forums will be a much less violent place from now on! but i think the moral of the story os if you are planning to stab any trolls, please bring a shamwow to save veggie from cleaning up after you!
IN AMERICA!
How come nobody ever talks about the Fail?
And its OBV phototshopped.
look at the corners
not correct with the sign
*sigh*
*wanders off to find amusement elsewhere*
There’s a lot of that going around, Judy. Ye gods…
Almost makes me look forward to Monday…
Don’t say that, Judy!
*squeeze*
Hey Admiral I’ve decided to stop being a two year old on here will you help me?
What’s with FB today? Anarchy?
Jeesh. Are weekends always like this? I usually don’t do weekends…
Sometimes in stores, there are SLIDING PAPERS for sales.
DO NOT DISPLAY THIS SIGN. ITS CALLED SUBTEXT U IDIOT
btw ima troll. HEE HEE HE!!
*barf*
adam takes damocles the holy trolll sword and stabs left then stabs right and then chops Jimmeh into seven peavies and cleans up the mess with his autographed shamwow
QUICK! TAKE MY SWORD!
o=|================================>
Am I a bad person if I edited a Wikipedia article on hamsters to say you should feed the the souls of chimpanzees?
them*
I have hamster that meanie!!
I’ll Slice Your Nuts Off!!!
My IQ is 136 bitch – suck a dick
*cries* for Jimmeh Because he forgot his decimal point… He worked so hard for that decimal point he should display it proudly!
Hello everyone!
I’m a WOMAN. You’ll have a hard time finding my nuts.
DAMN I love Target.
Can’t sleep….boreedddd.
haha good ole target, that’s why i work there…
faaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiil
sez’ who?
sez me
it is a fail
adam cleaves sez in half with holy sword of damocles and then uses shamwow to clean up the mess
Hot girls doing 69 for 25 minutes straight!!
hi chicken
*over loudspeaker*
Cleanup in aisle 9!
wait are u a troll
I love this picture.
and the comments on it.
R.B i hereby tase you in the the name of thor
Wow…I really hope that wasn’t the Target I work at. If I find out it was, I’m firing someone.
i tased them
Oh goodness…Target. Anyone seen one of the diaper packages for their new Up&Up marketing strategy? Let’s just say it’s…um…up somewhere it shouldn’t be. D: Fail.
it was in atlanta if anyone was wondering.
Having worked in retail, I totally understand how this could happen. In a couple of stores I worked at, I was one of the guys in charge of putting up new signs and changing prices. We got there about two hours before the store opened and had about an hour or so to get all the signage changed before the customers started showing up. I was pretty good at getting everything right, but some of my coworkers were less than careful about what they did. This pic could have easily been taken at one of the stores I worked at as I’ve caught and taken down mistakes like this.
That was a nice read.
That was a nice read.
That was a nice read.
That was a nice read.
At least now we know the employees can read
-_- IM NOT F*** SUPRISED