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Cheezburger Network Blog
Use a white crayon!
or cocaine.
‘Whats that son you want to colour your pictures in white? Here you go have some cocaine’ hmmmm
haha…parenting fail.
i think the book might have some “”special” ishues
lol u actually think this is a message well anyway the crayon is missing i think it just fused with the book
I’m Robert Downey Jr., and I approve this message.
POB!
*squeeeze*
We’ve missed you!
Note to self: Do not make any comments after chatting with DrB. They just come out weird and wrong.
*small voice* I like them.
This fail needs more Loz (if she wasn’t busy defending Ireland’s honor from the Magnificent Mr Cuddles).
This is an excerpt from the KKK coloring book…damn bigots…
there are white crayons and every item there can be white. no fail. this FAIL is a FAIL!
you’re a fail for not realizing that the paper is white so colouring it in wouldn’t make a difference
THATS the fail.
Maybe the paper was black and they just did a really god job colouring it in
*throws up extra o*
I liked the first way better.
“And God said ‘Let there be white!’ And there was.”
I told you not to eat so many o’s, every time you do you end up throwing up.
Oh, and I thought that was a Fruit Loop…
Please. A woman can never have too many ‘o’s.
obviously many haven’t colored with a white crayon because it easily shows up on any color paper, even white. picture white-out on a white piece of paper, it’s always visible.
It’s a Win for the children is what it is!
No you are the fail -.-’
exunkly
Ireland has honor now?! Damn! Why wasn’t I informed?!
*tries to sober up*
*put clothes back on*
*kicks pony out of bed*
*reads comment*
Stay calm Wolf, stay the f#$% down…
Why are you talking to yourself?
He sorta got all bent out of shape as soon as you started making fun of that douche bag country known as Ireland.I’m allowed make fun of it, i live there!
Do you enjoy authentic Irish nachos?Yep! We just call them ‘crisps’ here though.
That's what that means! I heard them called that the other day and I didn't know what they were talking about.US: UK/IREChips Crisps
Fries Chips
Careful, as I learned we have quite a few bloggers with Irish decent.
Irish decent what? I’ve been here 6 months, and I cant say I’ve seen an awful lot of decency.
Well, I meant to write descent. Don’t know where the s when. The decency is actually very evident, I don’t know how you missed it.
You need about 30% more insanity. You’ll see it then.
To put it in a simple, mannered way:
I’m Irish
*courtroom gasps*
*bangs gavel*
Guilty, guilty, guilty!!*shouts*
ORDER! I’M THE JUDGE HERE! WE MUST HAVE ORDER!!!
*bangs gavel thrice*
Order needs chaos in order for life to exist!
OBJECTION! *head roll*
YOur honour , the insanity is not the matter. It is the fact that this coloring book is racist.
Do I have to get a side salad?
Yes, and also some Ranch sau-
Hey, cut that out! This is a court of law, not a food court!
*bangs gavel, hits hand*
OW!
Hands over soft drink full of ice.
Oops I g a p p e d.
Phoenix Wright Fail
County Sligo, it’s true about the things they tell you.
But you wouldn’t believe it.
Kicks pony out of bed? Hell, at least it’s not a sheep. Why do Scotsmen wears kilts? (come on, guess, don’t just read the punchline.) Sheep can hear a zipper a mile away…..
Err…I was just…using her to keep my bed warm!
Hey, I don’t know. My ancestors were smart enough to leave the British Isles several hundred years ago.
lolololol. i have seen this before
Do you laugh that much whenever you see something /-one familiar? “Hi Mom! lololololol”?
lololololol hello!
um… I think that’s not how you do it, it’s more like:
hellolololololol
Want a lololololololipop?
You guys are all lululating again…!
homie Timber you FAIL…cuz that BEAR is a polar
bear and polar bears ARE WHITE!
or use your “natural abilities”
That’s a win. You don’t have to do anything.
Dang, can’t use names of drugs in FB… I just got moderated for it.
How about intercourse positions?
.
Dining table.
Office desk.
Headdesk.
Oh wait…
*waits…*
Staircase.
Kitchen countertop?
Steamer trunk in the cellar?
Car hood.
In bed.
Pfft. How mundane.
Jet ski.
Cleveland Steamer?
Inverted lamp shade on a portable stove top.
That one takes practice.
Don’t think that one will be tried anytime soon
The coffee machine. Hot and quick. Because . . .
owowowowOWOW!
Next time let’s try the copy machine.
Nice suggestion. If we load it with plenty of paper we can made a quite interesting sequence of ass and tits printouts.
Why do you need printouts when you have the originals at home?
Somebody told me that I need to replace the paintings I have at home with other ones more appropriate for my age.
However, I plan to do a thorough inspections on those originals when I come back to home.
I’m going shopping for dinner now. Pollo frito, or bimbo sandwich?
Pollo frito, my love. And you are the only ingredient I need.
…yay, you won!!
Holy sheep! I can’t bear it anymore!
*flakes-out*
You’re very colorful.
You’re very aquatic.
You're very wolfish.You’re very ninja!
You’re very beastie boy.
You’re all a Mötley Crüe
You’re very pornstar!
Your all Fail
That’s a polarizing picture.
It’s “white on white”. Very modern.
For dinner…scolloped potatoes on mash.
With bacon-wrapped ham?
And four different cheeses
and 7 herbs and spices?
Plus an authentic blend of 23 flavors!
Is that like Baskin Robbins 31 flavors?
No, like Dr. Pepper’s 23 Flavors, or 24 if you’re counting the cherry flavored one.
57!
Ill take the Fail/Win Flavor then
gaynorvader, those better be four different cheese-stuffed cheeses.
I like your thinking!
Oh my God! Why does it smell like a French farmer in here!?!
Sacre bleu cheese!
Tipex!
Sometimes I’m tempted…but I won’t be tipping that one anymore.
Oh, a comment so tasty it could be cheese.
Color blind coloring win?
Naw, then it would be green and red.
They’re taking that no child left behind thing a little too far, don’t you thing?
By leaving them all behind!
I’m afraid your spelling needs repair *tosses a screwdriver
*orders sex on the beach*
*Reports location to the news*
*abandons cocktail pun-run*
(hmmm my first one’s being moderated)
.
*abandons c**ktail pun-run*
C**katoos are white, right?
^supposed to be an answer, let’s try it again…
Oh, well I guess it’ll sort itself out once the moderation is done. *Sighs loudly*
Bird name Fail
Cöck?
What do the double dots above the o do? Does it turn the pronunciation into the long version or something?
They mean that the Double Dragon have arrived
What vowel summons the Battletoads?
No, it changes the pronunciation entirely, at least in Swedish.
Wow this nesting bug really bugs me
Come and sit in my nest.! Olur.
Looks crowded…
All I know is they’re called umlauts.
Quoting Wikipedia:
“n linguistics, umlaut (from German um- “around”/”the other way” + Laut “sound”) is a process whereby a vowel is pronounced more like a vowel or semivowel in a following syllable. The term umlaut was originally coined and is principally used in connection with the study of the Germanic languages. In umlaut, a back vowel is modified to the associated front vowel when the following syllable contains [i], [iː] or [j] (the sound of English ). This process took place separately in the various Germanic languages starting around 450 or 500 AD, and affected all of the early languages except for Gothic.”
It adds a kind of heavy metal feeling, as in Mötley Crüe. These are called Metal umlauts or Rock dots.
I was about to explain it. Then I read that explanation and now I don’t understand what the dots do anymore. Just one thing they for sure do: Confuse the fücking filter…
I’m as confused as you are old bean! I’m going to continue believing the elongate the sound of the vowel. (über is pronounced oo-ber, uber is pronounced ub-ber)
Erm, no. There is no “uber” in German, sorry. In fact, Olur was right. It changes the pronounciation completely. If you want to hear it go to dict. cc and type in “schön” and then “schon”. There’s a button to listen to the word on the right.
Wouldn’t fücking be pronounced “ferrking” with an umlaut?
I think über is slang in English for some reason, but I’m not sure, it’s more than likely some bastardised version of a word in another language. Unfortunate that it’s not as simple as I’d hoped! Lousy languages, why can’t we all speak in maths!
The ¨ can be an umlaut or a trema. Those are different things. An umlaut changes the sound of a vowel, e.g. Wort v Wörter, while a trema is used to indicate that two subsequent vowels are to be pronounced separately, as in geëmmer (which would now be spelled ge-emmer I believe.)
BFF – no, but I can’t find the right way to write it so the English pronounciation sounds like the German.
GV – “über” is a normal German word, “uber” doesn’t exist. I’m guessing that uber is the way English-speaking people write über (easier for you…), since the meaning seems to be the same as in German.
How does the umlaut change the sound of the vowel, or does it vary from word to word?
Arthur: No, we use über as well, I was just demonstrating what I meant by ‘elongating the sound of the vowel’. Uber is just a word I made up to demonstrate what I meant!
Thanks Aja, I gorgot that. When I’m not mistaken (may be!) we only have or had the trema above i and e. ä ö and ü are always umlauts.
Okay, this is getting complicated. First: *forgot. Secondly, to hear what the umlaut does see my post above^^^. And thirdly: Really? I thought you do write that something is “ubercool”. At least that’s how I saw it on blogs… Which, of course, doesn’t mean much.
I did check out what you suggested, I was just making sure that it was applicable to more than just the odd word. And yes, many people write ‘über’ as uber, this is because ‘ü’ is not readily available on the keyboard, also because most English speaker’s eyes are not trained to pick up on ‘¨’ and so we miss them, for instance I read uber in your 8:50 post as über!
i would usually write über myself as that is the correct spelling, but you know what the internet can do to spelling! 
Ueber is the same as Über
sigh -
it changes the sound
über is pronounced more like eeber but the tone of the vowel is a little deeper – something between oo and ee
the thingie that would elongate the sound of the vowel looks like this úúúúú and is used e.g. in czech (únor) not german
I was aware that ú turned the vowel into a long sound; we have the same thing in Irish, it’s called a fada. I just didn’t have much experience with ü, but my questions have been answered…for now! Mwahahahaha!
…Ferrking Fail
Cork soaker!
Cork screw?
Udder sucker!
Rudder plucker
Fudd rucker!
Fail Mail
Kerry tart.
I’ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts!
There they are all standing in a row
Big ones, small ones, some as big as your head
Darn it! I’ll never get that out of my head now…
placement FAIL. =(
Fail Blog has been having a severe case of brain farts lately.Im sure you must have a lot of milk in them too… pour me a glass woman XD
Captain? (high school German can be a lot of pun)
Spell check didn’t find anything wrong with it. What’s wrong, then?
*tosses you an asterisk*
Check the last part of the sentence “don’t you thing?”
Ah, I see. My mind is never with me. Isn’t insanity fun?
*bukkits*
*grins* well next time ask the person next to you if that’s how its written.
I would, if I was paying more attention to my typing instead of my music, and if someone was next to me in the first place!
*shoots music player and tosses a sentence checker*
Well there goes 90% of my life.
Oh well, more Guitar Hero for me then!
*sends his friend that’s a guiter hero freak to play with*
You happy now? Now someone can check my sentences!
I’m never happy (unless I want to be) but this little conversation is definitly a win “Well there goes 90% of my life.”
Although it’s sad that it’s more like 95%.
You there have more wins in what you say then anyone I ever met
Well, since we’re on FAILBlog, wouldn’t that be blasphemy or something?
Perhaps. But I’d call madness. Where is Azazel when you need him?
2 Person Chat? On a comments board? FAIL!
Yes, of course ‘White’ is written in boldest black ink.
Can I have scissors to cut the white crayon off the page so that I may use it to color everything else white?
Only if the scissors are white.
okkk?
FIRST TO SAY FIRST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
First to say shut up
FIRST TO SAY EASY!!!!!!
*Takes out minigun and turns troll into swiss cheese*
Hey, you were the first to say ‘minigun’!
Was I? from all the conversations I saw you guys have I’m surprised you didn’t even say it once.
I don’t know why – it’s a rather agreeable word.
Minigun.
Minigun.
Minigun.
I prefer SMGs more.
┌╦═╤─
I dunno, miniguns are so subtle. They sound so innocent
The name does, at least. The bullets themselves sound like thousands of angry hornets ready to attack. Just a hornet doesn’t hurt that much.
Is that an African or European hornet?
I… I don’t… know… ‘~’
Hmm… It seems to have messed up the quotes. Now it looks angry instead of confuzzled.
You forgot the middle-eastern hornet
You forgot the F18 Hornet.
(and you forgot your Monty Python references)
You forgot the Green Hornet.
(I too mourn the lost opportunity for a Monty Python reply.)
I prefer BFGs myself…
Big Fat Guns?
Big Friendly Giants?
Roald Dahl?
Spinach Dahl!
Rolled Ball?
Big fart grenades!
Ill see your SMG and raise you a 8=3
(Kudos if you know what that is…)
Miiengunn means wolf and sounds so much like mini-gun.
*Cheers from a safe vantage point*
Why do you cheer from up here? Its my sniping spot! *headshot*
I think that troll is done now. ‘Morning GV!
Of course he’s done! I turned him to swiss cheese a few comments ago…well alot of comments ago
Morning!
*squeeze*
- Paint it!
- Already done!
Color me bàààààd.
Only if you say please.
Slegs blankes
I never really got the point of the white crayon…
Maybe for toddlers to eat?
It’s vanilla flavored.
This color book seperates the smart and the dumb people.
That’s odd, my post came above people who posted first.
I hope this bug will happen in a comment section with someone claiming “first”, that someone else bounces and becomes the new first poster
It was just a momentary separation of reason.
that FAIL should’ve been in white too
Teacher fail. Everyone knows you use color paper for printing/copying those pages.
Overachievers. They even colored the page white. Remember, the tallest blade of grass gets cut by the mower first.For sadistic pleasure, I always leave the Tallest Blade for LAST! I cut around it, getting ever closer, until the final pass when I swerve in and mow it over just when it thinks it has escaped such a fate. The next time it doesn’t grow as high!
I prefer to cut all my grass first. It creates a low moral among the grass and then it stays short for me.Let it grow, let it grow…
then smoke it.
That is a strange bear.polar opposites
He’s just missing his bottle of Coke is all.
Then what’s he smiling about?
ROTFL, and you wonder why your average kid of today is as dumb as the day is long!
RT
http://www.real-anonymity.pro.tc
I’m just crayon the sheep can bear those flakes.
Take the first letter from each item and spell a word.
i dont feel like it…
Like Bear + Snowflake + Sheep + Crayon = BSSC???
I’d better inform the Bolton Society for Sick Camels
Or the Bank of Socially Stupid Creditors.
That’s where I keep my money so that Bob Seger’s Sandwich Creators don’t steal it!
Fail or auto completion
I much prefer if my colo(u)ring book for class had more pages like this. Handing it in as is would give quite a few kids an ego boost.
Maybe they have to colour in the lines white?
Invisa-sheet?
It’s recycling! They can use the paper then afterwords to draw things like sheep, polar bears, crayons and snowflakes!
All those objects; in a snow storm.
Oh no. Damn I never thought of it that way.
All done!
I remember in grade 1 we had to color something, and a part of it I wanted white, so I didn’t colour it. I brought it up to the Student Teacher and she rubbed her finger over the white and said I hadn’t coloured it, so I had to go back and colour it with a white crayon. :S
Grade school prepares us for civil service!
Ah, it’s good to be back. My old laptop went kaput, so I’ve been without internet access for about a month and a half.
Welcome back! And congrats for your new laptop.
Nice to see you have made an upgrade to 2.0
Welcome back POB!
racism at its finest…
Where?
Some people think that calling something “black” or “white” turns it into racism. It’s like we need to deny the existence of these colors, both in humans and in nature.
*mumblestupidetthingevermumble*
Racism is never fine.
I don’t see racism in this fail. What am I missing?
You are missing the ability to understand a moron. Nothing is wrong with you. Donna Donna just has 2 brains, one is lost the other is out looking for it.
Whatever it is; I’m missing it too!
In my opinion I think you are missing Donna Donna’s reference to over-the-top political correctness. “Baa, baa, rainbow sheep.” “You can’t use a blackboard because you are using white chalk on black, asserting white as the dominant colour.” To be honest, I prefer rainbow sheep and whiteboards.
Cuddlefish!!!
I never heard of “baa baa rainbow sheep” so I googled it and found the lyrics for the whole PC song:
Baa, baa rainbow sheep, have you any wool ? Yes person yes person, three (environmentally friendly trading standards approved) bags full; one each for the gender equality (and non age discriminated) community leader as well as one for the young person who lives in a child friendly nanny state down the lane.
*snork*
*waves to Cuddlefish*
Thanks for getting it
Surely Donna isn’t a racist.
Do I print my name with the white crayon also?
Kindergarten bootcamp?
buba found the failure: the shuriken should be on the page “grey color”!
If you think that’s a shuriken, my lad, then you’re going to get a nasty surprise the next time it snows.
Lazy Kid win
I had this colouring book, actually.
I could do this.
Well…you could color them black and then white.
Hmm…. I remember my kindergarten and first grade teachers both actually made us color white things in with white crayon.
The white crayons – they don’t sell very well for some reason.
I had to do something like that in school once… I failed.
takes out troll sword chops waffle into seven small pecies ha ha ha
i think its a WIN
A page from ‘The Official KKK Koloring Book’, possibly?
Racism fail? You are a f**king idiot. But it is okay to have a Black Expo, Black History Month and all Black Colleges? I think its time you idiots stop focusing on your past and become better people. What is the “ghetto” mostly made of? BLACKS and MEXICANS. You all make me sick anyways. WHITE POWER!
Um, yeah. It’s clear that *I’m* the idiot here.
White crayons, if used just for this purpose, would get wasted!
This must be the book for those kids dropped on there head and thyve been getting color books for Xmas there whole lifes
He already colored it in, then they took the picture!
Wow, why say color it white? Why not any other color? Racism fail!
Racism fail? You are a f**king idiot. But it is okay to have a Black Expo, Black History Month and all Black Colleges? I think its time you idiots stop focusing on your past and become better people. What is the “ghetto” mostly made of? BLACKS and MEXICANS. You all make me sick anyways. WHITE POWER!
This has already been on this website before anyways… Use new pics or none at all!
FAILUR IN THE FACE
Colour is spelt wrong too.
Colour is only spelled with a u in British and Canadian English. American English has it without the u.
i say this is a win, its already done for u!
Already done win
LOL coloring for lazy people
Turn the paper over, and it’s a picture of a polar bear in a snowstorm.
remember those white crayola crayons? they did add texture
double fail: the designer has never seen a snowflake, as it seems. snow flakes are hexangular!
how is this a fail? they make white crayons.
its a fail because you cant see it for all you know oh insolent one they could make invisible crayons
you are coloring them on white paper
whips out sword and cuts you into seven small pecies and cleans up small bits with mop bukkit and shamwow
HOORAY!!!! IM DONE
whips out trusty troll sword sprinkles holy water from saint peters isle on it and chops anonymus into seven small pices then takes shamwow and wipes off blade
wait is it possible that your are not a troll newcomer if not please exept mai apologys
This is good fail until you think about it, and realise…
This is a teacher’s photocopying master. It’s part of a single-copy set that you then copy onto colored paper. The kids can then use a white crayon, paints, etc to “color” (bleach?) the pictures to white from whatever color of cheapy-cheap photocopier paper the teacher used.
/ex teachers’ technical assistant & stationery handler blog
Ah, interesting! Thank tahrey
My little sister has that book. She doesn’t know how to get the white to show, lmfao. FAIL.
Well, yah see—the paper is “off-white” and the crayon you use must be whiter *wink*
There is such a thing as a white crayon!
Also it seems to me the fail was directed at the bear, which in my opinion is still inaccurate because it could be a polar bear!!
the fail is because you are using a crayon that is white to color white things on white paper
I see someone did a great job coloring
Really? Why would they make that. Seriously.
JO JO .. the kid will see the drawind and will say… Done!…jajajajajaja LOL
lol, you have white crayons. fail on your part :p
wouldnt it be hilarious if they put a picture of a person?
SPERM!
okkkkkkkay
uhh…let me see…DONE!
Boyamayin o zaman, bu kadar tartismaya ne gerek vardi ki…
best regards..
Well looks like my work here is done.
hey, i had that same worksheet back in kindergarden!