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FIRST!!!!
OY! *shakes head*
That wasn’t very abstract.
It could be. . .
. . . but it wasn’t.
…should’ve been.
Then who?
Who took the cookie from the cookie jar?
LEILA took the cookie from the cookie jar…
LIES!!! I am on a diet.
Sorry…that was me. I have a weakness for cookies. Cookies and bread cannot escape me without being eaten.
So… after you ate cookies and bread… Aaaah, I understand.
Let’s feed the hungry with tasty, delicious animals. MICROPHONE.
Taste the Rainbow.
But they CAN escape you after being eaten.
tASTE THE MICROPHONE
S
.0
..
…C
….O
…..N
……F
……O
…….R
……..M
………I
……….S
………..T
u emo?
true, I did upset many people by not giving them what the expected…non-conformist… maybe it’s reaching, but, eh.
I think this calls for an exorcism. . . THE POWER OF FAIL COMPELS YOU!
“Keep away! The sow is mine!”
Sow your seed somewhere else. . .
No, I was playing the part of Regan MacNeil as you were attempting to exrocise the deamon from me. You have to be Father Merrin and say, “The power of Christ compells you”. *imagines Noconspiracy yelling “line” off stage to the prompter*
oh, hahahahahahaha self fail…..you already did that! OMFG, I need a labotamy!
*self labotamizes…drools on floor*
*replaces several letters with several other letters*
*hands bukkit to abstract*
You might wanna hold onto that…
Hey! I’m still sitting in this bukkit! Take another one!
* Flushes bukkit next to Arthur’s. *
Oops! Did your bukkit just spray you?
Happens all the time.
*sigh*
*self lobotomizes”
Who’s floor and why are you drooling on him?
Was it a Golden Labotomy or a Chocolate Labotomy?
FISH
sorry, my phone rang, that was all I had time for. don’t send me to the cave, Please!! What did the first guy say? we have no audio at work. The camera falling was pretty funny, though.
*bops on head with rolled up newspaper*
*wags finger*
You’re a baddie.
*wimpers and sulks* please love me again, I’ll be good.
*trying to find love in heart for abstract* Nope. Sorry. I will check again later though.
Where is the love?
I think it’s been misplaced somewhere in Nevada…
*teleports to Nevada, looks for love, finds LasVegas* Well, it’s not exactly love, but it will do.
I located the remains of some aliens, probably 60 years old by the looks of them. Does that count?
I are be comfused about this,
the remains are sixty years old
or the aliens are 60 years old ?
Don’t waste time on this post. If you must know, google “Area 51″ and “aliens”.
If there’s not a song called “It’s Not Exactly Love, But It Will Do”, then there should be.
“two out of three aint bad” That makes me mad evertime I hear it.
If you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with.
Sorry, you beat me to it.
Hee!
Haw!
Wait…does anyone else hear an ass in here?
Do not worry, it was just me talking to myself again.
BR549
If you can’t be with the one you love,
love the one your with. Love the one your with.
“It’s Not Exactly Love, But It Will Do”
It’s not exactly love, but it will do,
at least there’s lust when I see you.
It’s always hard when I take a look
at you center folded in this book.
You’re my favorite, so far this year.
Oh, how I wish that you could hear,
when I’m calling out your name,
so you would know that I just came.
We’ll never meet, we’ll never touch,
but I adore your looks so much!
It only takes just a minute or twooo!
It’s not exactly love, but it will doooo!
{sing with a country drawl}
For information on acquiring the rights to
“It’s Not Exactly Love, But It Will Do”
contact Me. I can add more verses as
needed; just give me a little privacy.
*snork* *wipes Coke off screen* I could hear that….in my head.
Just leave your money and move along. You’re looking for love in all the wrong places, abstract.
Okay fine!! I don’t want karma to kick my a**.
-
abstract, you are loved once again.
YEAH!!!! I am loved again! Life is good! I was seriously down-hearted when you said you had no love for me….*wipes little tears of happiness from eyes*
There…there! But if I ever see you say FIRST again, I will … I don’t know what I will do but it won’t be pretty.
Baconlube will be involved.
Along with a pair of tongs, a potato and pickle surprise.
B-B-Baconlube?
And a turducken.
All hail turducken!
*wonders how Turducken would taste if the chicken were stuffed with bacon*
hail turduken, hail!
TURDucken! HAHAH!!! Okay, sorry, that’s not funny but you people should be ashamed of yourselves.
You just dropped a bomb.
The hail, you say?
*is not ashamed of herself*
So neener! :p
You called?
You guys are so silly!!!
Then we’re doing something right!
Someone rang for Turducken?!?!?!
Can you perform fellatio and still be a vegetarian?
*blinks*
*tries not to think about that question*
Well, you’re not ingesting the actual meat… although, depending on what else you ingest, it may not be vegan.
Not even consensual swallowing is ok for a vegan?
♪ She don’t eat meat, but she sure likes the bone ♪
I don’t know. Maybe we should ask Leila.
Another question: Do vegans breast-feed their kids?
This is making my head hurt.
Oh gawd give me some strength.
-
Jules says it best: ♪ She don’t eat meat, but she sure likes the bone ♪ … and NO I DO NOT … (I can’t say it) … unless it tastes like chocolate and we all know that’s impossible.
Sörry.
*really wants to know the answer to that question*
*is fascinated by this conversation*
A guy walked up to me once in a bar and asked me, “Do you spit or swallow?” I shot him a level look, and answered, “I duck” and walked away.
Good answer Dragon! LOL!!!
-
To answer the question at hand, swallowing has nothing to do with being vegetarian/vegan. It’s a personal preference. In a previous blog I maintained that I do not want that sh*t in my mouth. Period. I think it’s soooooo gross.
Dragon, you always have the best come-backs.
No, I wasn’t trying to be punny.
You were TOO! :p
I am with Dragon.
That is not a pun-run I would want to start.
But we can all give it a happy ending.
You can beat him with this.
*hands Leila the ugly stick*
*saves ugly stick for future use* TY Jules.
hi…not a ‘him’
it?
Robot?
Thing?
abstract … all the more reason to have the ♀♂ option/indicator on FB.
I’ll go with that. Thanks LEILA
I still wouldn’t get it right.
too abstract?
Love me two times girl,
One for tomorrow,
One just for today!
Would you settle for 3 times?
That’s what she said!
Once… twice… three times a lady…
Once… twice … but at least, three times daily…
You know, a promise can always be broken…
*sigh*
His mother was my sophomore English teacher……
Ma veditene d’anna’ affanculo te e i tuoi FIRST der cazzo!!!!!
He can’t hear the technician.
What?
Who?
No, he’s on first.
Why?
Where?
When?
How?
Which?
You are all budding journalists! You know just what to ask.
Where did the bad man touch you?
What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?
Would that be an African swallow or a European swallow?
Is that an African or European swallow?
Don’t you owe me some money?
How did I get here?
Okay, perhaps I was wrong.
Is that my beautiful wife?
I did WHAT last night?
The potato was WHERE?
WHY are my pants covered in Bacon Lube?!
WHO are you and WHERE is my underwear?
HOW on earth . . . did you . . . in my . . . in the . . . *groans* *dies from shock but winks at the crowd imperceptibly* (and fast too!)
…and why am I sitting on a Merry-Go-Round in Oslo?
Does this smell like chloroform to you?
Most of the comments in this thread are things I hope never to hear in person. Or say.
Clickie for more things you never want to hear in person.
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
-
I think this happened to someone up in here. Let’s not name names.
I’m deeply disturbed that capn adorable will not so much miss my personality or wit but my road head skills.
That is a verbatim quote from a text sent to me (you guessed it) last night. My friends are hysterical!
This was in response to my telling her that I had just seen an Obama shaped Chia Pet.
I am soooo confused. What does that have to do with the Obama shaped Chia Pet?
It doesn’t have ANYTHING to do with it. That’s partly why I thought her text was soooo funny.
I seriously thought I was missing something from your message. Wow, that is a funny reply. LOL
There were worse texts too.
HE’S ON FIRST!
Diddja hear it that time?
My technician says he’s on first.
TOM BOSLEY!
You I KNOW can hear me!
I had my earbuds on listening to music. Sheesh …
*apologies offered up front*
Can you hear me NOW?
Powered by a Soviet Russia joke! Arrrghghhhh!!
In Soviet Russia, video powers quote?
This is an evil omen…
*starts burning incense* This should do it…no evil omen or owomen allowed.
What are owomen?
Are they like womanta rays?
*lolz*
I can’t get over the look on his face…
CREEPY FACE CREEPY FACE!! PREDATOR ALERT!
STRANGER DANGER!
Bad touch! Bad touch!
BAD TOUCH BAD TOUCH!
Now show the judge, on this doll, where the newscaster touched you. . .
What a touching story.
Feel good story of the year. . .
Wow that just sounds disgusting
Rubbed you the wrong way?
Yeah, I feel it all over.
A bit to abrasive for my tastes.
I like mine velvety smooth!
I dig your taste.
It has to be a grope effort, you know.
We seem to have a firm grip on these pun-runs.
It’s all fondle someone says the safety word.
I feel that I should. Safety word.
That was a nice touch…
Is it ok if Caress of us keep it up?
I think I’m starting to get the massage here.
I think I will just poke around the thread.
G, woody ou please?
Is there a rule that states that all television reporters must appear to be constipated?
No, don’t you remember the weatherman with the irritable bowel?
Weathermen are not really reporters though. Neither are the sports guys. I’m talking news anchors and the on-the-spot reporters.
Well, news anchors and “reporters” aren’t really reporters anymore, either, they’re just commentators.
True journalism in America died a few years ago.
Who opened that can of worms?!?!?!
Me. . . What, I had to fish!
*stares*
Lo. Doctor Lo.
That’s the truth!
… except for Stephen Colbert
The civic duty fail was on Colbert. (I sometimes repeat myself.)
The civic duty fail was on Colbert. (I sometimes repeat Arthur Eld.)
Is there an echo in here?
Quack! Nope!
This duck looks a lot like John Lennon. Maybe I can sell it on eBay.
Or go next door and make a front-page worthy TLL?
I always was the duck. The walrus was Paul.
I wonder how many funny guys do that – send them two identical pics and say, “Oh look at that!”
Yeah, these guys are called “talent” in the biz, although few really have any.
This is Chip with On-The-Spot Eyewitless Action News! I’m standing here in the strong wind and rain, and I’m here to tell you: Boy is it windy and rainy here! See how I have to lean into it? See how wet I am? This has been Chip, on location, with On-The-Spot Eyewitless Action News! Back to you, Biff!
Thanks for that On-The-Spot report, Chip. To repeat, Cincinnati is being bombed with live turkeys.
That’s gonna leave a mark!
Excellent! clickie!
Haha!!! I forgot about that!!!
“It’s a large banner and it says ‘Ha…ppy…Thanks…giving…W..K..R..P”
“As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly!!!”
What was Les’s line?
“As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly!”
There’s that echo again, Arthur!
Strange things happen in this blog…log…og.
The revenge on all humans who eat animals has finally begun! MUAHAHAHAHAH!!! Go my turkeys … DESTROY!!!!!!!
-
*looks around hoping no one heard*
Then, when he thinks the feed has been cut, we hear, “Who do I hafta screw to get my desk job back?”
“What the F do you think you’re doing???”
That’s what she said.
It’s deep in the bowels of the FCC reg manual.
Rule number 2.
Congress is trying to eliminate it.
It’s a bit of a strain on the system.
We’re in a bit of a pinch.
*pinches Starfish*
Heee!!
I see MRN has really been plumbing the depths of these regulations.
There are a few such irregularities in the law.
Leila is obstructing this pun run!
She should be separated by a :
She’s cramping our style!
Don’t force the puns out MRN. . .
But this is so cathartic!
Neglected to mention that these pun runs just bowel me over!
I am sorry. *removing self from pun run* Carry on.
Congress is the opposite of Progress.
And the definition of ‘politics’ is “many blood sucking insects”.
Isn’t that the definition to lawyer as well?
How did you find that? It must have taken alot out of you, you look flushed.
Well, I don’t like to bloat, but…
Careful you don’t get wiped out.
I’m going to bezoar for a while.
I felt the despair undulating thru my skin.
Just be sure not to tank the thread.
Yeah, we’re kinda anal about these pun runs.
It’s a serious movement.
Anyways, on a side note, I just bought an erectal set. . .
That was bad. . .
You just had to plug that, didn’t you?
I’m feeling a little flush, soon as I unclog my sinuses I’ll rejoin.
OK, swell.
Er, yes?
Would have rolled into the pun run, but I’m just too pooped.
Sorry, had toilet the cat out.
Could have turned out worse – what if it had happened to Sue Simmons? (the anchor from last week’s News Anchor Fail)
She wouldn’t have NEEDED a microphone!
I’m sure she would have just sunk. . .
What a jerk! I love it when these haughty face-casters get caught being the a**holes they are!
Yeah! Burn!
Uhm, do we need to be that harsh?
Yup. Potty mouth. ^^
Oops, meant to say *Jerk* (sorry, misspelled it in previous post)
Nah…nobody would ever get harsh here.
I live in Chicago, and I have to say that Andy Shaw is one of my least favorite reporters ever. He’s just a pompous stuck-up jerk with a bad attitude.
Everybody, take a wiff. Jules has that newly wed smell going on.
Smells like…
sex and candy?
Um, okay … that’s not what I smell, but I’ll go with it. …and, you had sex????
What is this world coming to?
And on his HONEYMOON too!
.
.
.
Ok, I’m just jealous…
Me too…but I won’t admit it!
Me too. *sigh*
Unbelievable!!!!
Don’t make me post pictures!
NO PICTURES! *waits for pictures to post and feels dirty at the same time*
Sorry, all my pictures are at home, and I am at work so you will have to wait.
Congrats Jules!
and what exactly were you doing with candy during sex? Nevermind. Sorry I asked.
Well, I’M not sorry you asked.
*waits for an answer*
Well…
Warm melted chocolate drizzled over…
*slurp*
Sorry started drooling.
Anyway, let just say KY Jelly is not the only lubricant out there.
Yes yes.. we all know about BaconLube.. but tell us about the candy!
Let just say everything is better with chocolate!
Would there be a fail involved, somehow?
Whoa…what a low blow.
-
Good god I hope not, I pay good money for Mr. J’s condoms!
Ho-made condoms seem appropriate somehow.
To the product, not the consumer.
Well I am not sure about the world but I know at one other person that was coming too.
JULES! The innuendo machine can’t take that kind of strain!
*explosion heard*
Oh dear. I’ll go get the ShamWow.
We seem to need a lot of ShamWows here on Failblog.
We’re a dirty bunch.
I’m sure it’s having an effect on me, but nothing seems to be
*pauses as two rather voluptious ladies walk pass*
be…be…
Sorry, what were we talking about?
I believe you were talking about your wild threesome last month, with the two girls at the cabin on the lake.
Someone stole my novel!!!! *looks at FBF suspiciously*
Two girls, one cabin?
Uh-huh, no effect. O.K. Sure.
Oh please. He’s a teenaged boy. That would happen anyway.
I think we may have sped things up for him though.
I offered someone at work a “pickle surprise” today.
*sigh*
Did you deliver on your offer?
And are they still (relatively) sane?
And champagne.
Congrats Jules!!
Thank you.
O
M
G
!!
A
C
L
U
!!
Y
M
C
A
!!
I like this one. “it’s fun to go to the YMCA…….YMCA……and…..at the YMCA” I have no idea how that song goes…obviously. But I still love it!
L
P
G
A
!!
*kicks abstract out of the thread*
Bad thread messer-upper, you!
Harper Valley
P
T
A
!!
Buncha stick-in-the-muds!
P
G
A
!!
I don’t play golf though.
O
I
C
U
8
1
2
!!
*does her best to roll with it, baby*
*
G
E
E
S
H
.
G
I
V
E
S
.
U
P
*
*
D
O
T
.
O
R
G
*
!
I’m scared! Hold me Nellie!
*raises eyebrow*
*lurks nearby as chaperone*
*just lurks*
Umm, Shawn, you got a little something right there.
Nope.
Higher.
Left.
More left.
There! See, we didn’t forget the mic!
U R ALL STUPID IDOTS AND I AM DA KING I RULEZ ALL U CAN DIRE IN A FIRE HAHAAAAAS AND ALSO I AM THE REAL PRO HERZ ALL U R FAIL LIKE THIS GUY! AHAHAHAHA I R FUNNY!
Next!
FUK U!
Is that a city north of Hanoi?
Actually, I think it’s the university there…
That explains a lot.
No, it’s south of Soule.
Um…NO THANK YOU!!!
Translation? Anyone?
*doesn’t speak idiot*
*can’t help*
Ssssssnap!
Hehehehehee!
Tickle button pressed!
Sorry…I don’t speak “stupid”.
Haha.. synchronized commenting… You should wear little pink tutus and a little flowery thingie on your nose when you do this.
U R ALL STUPID IDOTS – I am insecure and upon graduating the third grade I quit school.
.
AND I AM DA KING I RULEZ ALL – The colonel would hire me (KFC) so I work at Burger King.
.
U CAN DIRE IN A FIRE – This is a mis-attributed song. The song Fire was written by Jimi Hendrix not Dire Straights.
.
HAHAAAAAS – Multiple laughs.
.
AND ALSO I AM THE REAL PRO HERZ – Appearently they think they are of the female persuasion. Most likely a pre-op.
.
ALL U R FAIL LIKE THIS GUY! – Thinks we are as famous as Andy Shaw.
.
AHAHAHAHA I R FUNNY! – no translation… maybe dialectal.
Hehe! Thanks!
Thanks aiki – I knew we could count on you!
Perhaps this can be appended to Arthur’s “6 rules” for failblog.
aiki, you missed one … “FUK U!” …I have an idea of what it means but I may be wrong.
Oooooh, cool! Are the iDots you speak of something new from Aple? Oh, and you’re quite right about the fire being dire. They usually are. We appreciate your fine and graphic illustration of FAIL in your timely comment. Carry on, *insert appropriately filthy expletive label here*.
DIE IN A FIRE ALL OF U
Notice that you replied to yourself. Just sayin’.
Oooh…! So there’s a multiple personality thing going on here, too…
I hate it when all the personalities suck… *looks at flame with disappointment*
Obviously. But at least it is partially aware of its split personality. It doesn’t like some of them and wants to burn ‘em. My interpretation.
That works for me…here, I’ll even help him.
*starts stoking the fires*
*prepares for FOOOOMAGE*
*puts marshmallows on sticks and makes several cups of hot chocolate*
*grabs guitar*
It has its advantages to have some trolls.
*sings* How many roads must a man walk down…
42?
♪ Let me stand next to your fire ♫
Where’s the FOOOOM??
There was supposed to be an Earth-shattering FOOOOM!!!
I paid to see a FOOOOM! Where is it?
Hmph. I don’t perform on demand. :p
That’s not what the AA says
Our performances are demanding, but we don’t place demands on each other.
*snork*
Good point.
:p
D’OH!!!
That’s one of the rare times you got there before I did, Admiral!
*smooooch*
And one of them apparently accidenty spelled “stupid” correctly. Go figure.
Fellow Failbloggers… what do you make of his name? Is that a request to have something fiery inserted up there?
Hey, I offered!
But, DW, he didn’t say the magic word!
Antidisestablishmentarianism?
unOFFICIAL PETITION TO INCLUDE ♀♂ INDICATOR IN FB.
1)LEILA ♀
2)Malicite ♀♂
3) MRN Ç
4) Dragon Ж
5) swell ƒoop: comes complete with the inability to reƒrain ƒrom reƒerring to (her)self as exactly that *ah, ƒooey … and yet again*
6) Arthur *inspects*: Male. Has learned that swell foop is female.
7) Aikiwaza *inspects Arthur* AHHHGGH He wasn’t kidding. Male.
*adjusts loupe*
*SNORK!!*
7) Wolf ♣ Has learned everything, yet knows nothing.
8) Fluffy <
haha.. it converted my fish in a weird weird way…
Fitting!
*ducks*
Hmmm… :fluffy:
♂, ♍
♀♂? Are you the paralegal formerly known as Malicite? (PFKAM)
Negatory.
It’s more fun if you don’t know.
I’ve been to bars like that.
I’ve been in wom…..nevermind.
My picture gives me away
*needs to go find a picture of Kirby like he always wanted to do*
*squeeze*
Imagine there’s no gender,
It’s easy if you try. ♪
but I like gender … male especially!!!
*squeeze* I like your pic. Don’t remove it.
For you, I will. *squeeze!*
You’ll remove it for her, even though she asked you not to??
That’s cold, man…
Don’t remove it! Me likey! Otherwise I would soon be the only one with a person as an avatar.
I will not break that common bond!
Arthur, your avatar reminds me of an old soap commercial. Dial, or something. Am I right?
BTW, I do believe my avatar is a person!
I’m a real boy!
Well…technically, you can see part of my person in my avatar…
However true that is, tis still not the best part.
*decides not to ask…*
*pouts*
Well, he’s right. Your brain is the best part.
Um……yup, that’s what I was referring to.
*SQUEEZE!!*
Guys like you are awesome.
*snork*
Yes, that even includes you, 2th. :p
My awesomeness includes B2th?
Of course it does. I am B2F, King of the Druids, leader of planet Druidia!
Hee…!
Easy for him to say!
Mind if I cut in here? Dragon’s brain is the reason I got addicted to FB (and to her). It makes me smile to see others show their appreciation. Thanks, guys!
*hugs to all*
Um…LOOK OVER THERE! Something shiny!
*sneaks into the Admiral’s arms while everyone’s attention is diverted*
Eeek, that ^ is what is known as a “misplaced” comment.
*nose grows*
Hee!
*thinks about what Dragon just said and gets a nose bleed*
I thought it was… H O T hot hot hot….
*passes out*
… it’s coming
Pickle Surprize
There ya go! Solved! (the name, not the pickle surprise)
Well, that was fun while it lasted and I suppose you are right.
You helped me learn that Jules was a guy! Thanks Leila!
*thought the opposite actually*
My job here is done then! I feel very accomplished right about now.
Frankly, I’m dying to know what GCF puts. I’ve never been able to figure him/her/them out.
HAH! Me too!
If we do not have an answer by 12:01 MST, we will vote and decide if GCF is M/F.
*gets out the ballot boxes and synchronises watch*
Wait! I still didn’t find out what I am?
Well, reach down and … you know…and report back.
This is hammy, ready to report. Ahem:
When I reached under my chair, I found a post-it note, a Harry Potter sticker, and 3 pieces of gum. I just have one question: how does this determine my gender?
major fail!
Major Payne!
One tubby tubby tubby!
Made your plane!
That avatar…
That voice! Where have I heard that voice?
In my head maybe?
In your head, in your head,
Zombie, zombie, zombie,
Hey, hey, hey. What’s in your head,
In your head,
Zombie, zombie, zombie?
Hey, hey, hey, hey, oh, dou, dou, dou, dou, dou… .
Oh, the voice is easy to determine, it’s the nose that I can’t quite pick
he looks like a character from the simpsons
)
Mr. Burns?
“Smithers, land the plane over there”
“You’re flying the plane sir”
“Excellent”
“Wolf, reply the comment over there”
“You have already replied, Blue2thFairy”
“Excellent”
I haven’t watched the Simpsons in like 7 years.
So you missed the one good episode since then….sucks to be you man.
I can never understand what you guys are talking about
Sorry.
Only if you explain
Okay, then I don’t explain and therefore I am not sorry. Thanks!
Oh, Arthur…you are just *roffle*!
*squeeze*
*ahem*
Well, you see, when a mommy and a daddy love each other very much…someone care to finish?
Usually you aren’t supposed to finish so quickly.
*rolls over, falls asleep*
The correct procedure is Stop, Drop, Roll.
I though it was Puff, Puff, Give?
ThoughTAH
50% chance of that, yes.
Don’t make me downgrade you from awesome to “typical”…!
(Admirable Admirals are, of course, automatically exempt from the “typical” category…!
)
A persiflage of the stereotype, nothing more. Ok – not often, to be honest.
Thanks, babe. I’m feeling left out of the love today–it has been busy at work.
*smooch*
*includes AA in the love*
*smooch*
*runs away to avoid FOOOOM!!!*
That doesn’t deserve a *FOOOM!!*
That deserves a *SNORKITY!!
And my Admiral knows he’s never left out of the love.
Hee! It’s good to feel loved!
They give eachother a special hug…
*tosses a space up*
Bukkit?
No worries, I here “eachother” is actually a word in some countries.
I’ll be hear all night folks.
Try the veal (unless Leila’s listening.)
mmmmmmm…..baby calf meat.
j/k Leila
pssst… better not “kid” either, if you get my meating.
Oh…haha … it’s just tofu. Good. Carry on.
I’m not…
aren’t you what?
Since you weren’t specific about what you want explained, I’ll start from the beginning:
There’s a picture of a baby with its head stuck in the carriage. Matt says, “This is taped the door to my dorm room. It makes me choke with laughter after a long day of crunching equations.”
Then Chas replies…
So long, and thanks for all the fish.
That’s because these comments are auto-generated.
The software still isn’t sophisticated enough.
Wait until version 4.0, it will all become clear and the posts will nest correctly.
You’re such a bad liar.
Wanna take it up with the Central Processor?
No, last time he Hertz me.
With great frequency?
Yes, I really got rammed.
Right in the hard drive. Ouch!
Hopefully, the next Turing test will turn out better than the last one.
First on page two!!!
Um, no.
Why won’t it let me reply to other peoples comments on the first page after page 2 has appeared?
It won’t? I bet you stopped watching the Simpsons about 7 years ago, so you don’t know why, do you?
Then again, it COULD be because you didn’t click “Show All”…
Because you have to click “show all” to … well, see all.
Oooohh, I see.
It seems like this method of pruning new posts off of old threads is rather strange. It would probably make more sense if once earlier threads got too big, later threads got moved to the next page such that each individual thread remains intact.
Why not just “Show All” all the time?
vvv
I know, I know. Sometimes I start at the bottom, sometimes the top.
The ladies like some variation, so you’re doing good.
Because that could get you arrested!
Awww… Maybe we coulda had him going for a few minutes.
HEY!! I may be stupid but…yeah…you probably could have.
Wow, this place is amazingly troll free nowadays….who’s been on cleanup duty?
Fluffy! She and Emily have done an awesome job.
Woohoo Fluffy!!!
Kudos to Fluff and Em!
Woohoo Emily!
…and cookies to all!
Aww… I’ve disabled my cookies…
You cookie bastage!
You fargin icehole!
WIN# 2!
Cookies?!
Seriously, it’s a weakness. I will do almost anything for a cookie.
Time to get really creative…
What can we make Ms B do for a cookie?
*ponders*
I’m thinking something to do with nakedidity?
I was leaning more towards bowling.
Bowling naked?
I sense a reality show here.
If anyone says anything about having
20 lb balls….*trails off ominously and glares*
Hmmm…
I like bolwing…
I like being naked…
I fail to see a problem with this scenario.
bowling…
BUKKIT!
*Passes bukkit. Throws in cookie for spelling ‘naked’ right*
At least you didn’t misspell it as “blowing”.
*Giggle*
When I first realized I spelled it wrong I thought I had spelled it that way! I almost spewed my water all over the screen.
And to all, a good night.
If he worked for the BBC, he would be fired for getting so angry.
Hello, everyone!
I’ll have to be trollish right now. Apologies in advance.
.
GET RID OF THE FUKING 300-BARRIER, YOU MORONS!!! I HAVE TO SCROLL ALL DAY, THAT SUCKS ASS!!!
Hmm… is it trollish if we all agree?
Hey, it’s a democratic blog. We are all united in our displeasure of the notorious 300 barrier, and the admin should listen to the vox populi once in a while, ie – us, to ensure everything is hunky-dory.
That put my brain in a tizzy – latin balanced with the phrase hunky-dory. Wuoah!
Oh Aruthur!
(laughing)
At least they should make it so that the cp=all inherits in the recent comment links.
You are good with computers and all that, aren’t you? Would it be a big technical problem to do that? If you don’t know – Skwerlly?
The ?cp=all is persistent in the URL when you reply, isn’t it?
(I’m testing that right…….. now.)
Next thing you’ll want me to fix your wireless network.
Actually… could you, please?
You mean they break ?
*offers to set digital watch for no additional charge*
My VCR has a blinking 12:00. Any ideas?
Get a DVD player…or better yet, blu-ray.
Better yet, stop watching TV.
I just use control + f and find my name, see if anyone has responded nearby. Else I check the recent posters, control f their name and go up, so it picks up their bottom most post.
And does that work with a mac?
Avis just for you, I searched it up, its the apple key + f for you.
I never knew about that function!
I am learning so much today.
Sucks aspirin?
Sucks Association?
Sucks aspirations?
Sucks aspargus.
ASP Sucks….oh, wait…..sorry.
OK, since I’ve never done one of these before:
In Soviet Russia, asparagus sucks you.
Fun times.
Aspergillus sucks big time.
Aspergillus Clavatus? Look it up….
Why would you think I need to…?
Aspergers doesn’t appear to be much fun either.
Are you casting aspersions on Aspergers??
I would never aspire to cast aspersions on Aspergers!!
*drinks aspartame-sweetened soda whilst never aspiring to cast aspersions on Aspergers*
*can’t drink aspertame-sweetened soda whilst never aspiring to cast aspersions on the various aspects of Aspergers*
(Note: not said with asperity)
:p
Smart-asp.
:p
Would you care for tomatoes in aspic?
I’ve been meaning to ask. What is a spirin?
Google it.
Pay no attention to this comment – I just feel like randomly entering something that has no relevance whatsoever to anything that happens to be said, is in the middle of bbeing said, or will be said. I also like to ramble on and on about unimportant things to relieve sress, and today is final day of finals and I am seriously wound up way too much for my own good. Sorry for wasting so much of your time – please continue with the wonderful safety lecture.
Good luck! And remember – if you mess that up you’ll DIE POOR AND LONELY!!!
(Not really.)
Hmm…this may be off topic, but I’m curious. What kind of music do you guys/girls/aliens/meerkats listen to?
Check out yesterday afternoons fail. Earworms galore!!!
SO WHEN YOU’RE NEAR ME, DARLING CAN’T YOU HEAR ME, S.O.S!
MONEY MONEY MONEY, MUST BE FUNNY, IN A RICH MAN’S WORLD.
ABBA is the worst band that has ever performed. Every song is an earworm. I hate ABBA. I really do. Sorry to all ABBA-fans.
*cries*
*sheds a tear and sadly drives away in jeep*
YOU BOTH?!? The youngest on this blog? I’m speechless!
Shocking isn’t it? Especially when you realise that Abba isn’t even the worst in BFF’s collection.
*secretly likes Abba but won’t admit it to Arthur*
I was born in Sweden…I’m allowed to like Abba. :p
I saw Sweden on a map…am I allowed to like Abba too?
*hopeful*
In that logic Canadians would be allowed to like Celine Dion!
I just watched Mamma Mia with my sisters last week! I LUV ABBA! Sing it again, sing it again!!!!
If it makes you feel any better, Arthur, I can’t stand Abba either.
Nor Bee Gees, or most of the pop that came out in 70′s and 80′s.
I grew up on nice, relaxing, melodic music, like Ozzy Osbourne.
I gave the dvd to my mom for mother’s day. Then we watched it!
*cries*
too many comments.
Will this one jump?
*grabs comment*
No.
Woah. Everyone is turning up today.
*turns up*
*squeeze*
Btw, what exactly is a “Moomin”?
The Moomin….just IS.
One of those unexplained mysteries in life.
Clicky.
And there goes the unexplained mystery…
I feel disappointed… *thinks that is awesome though*
T.M.I.
*turns down*
(Literally, I’m leaving, going to work)
*drops out*
*waves and distributes (((hugs))) all ’round*
I noticed.
Hahaha!
Hee!!
*snörk*
*röffle!*
Wow… are you bored? Or just out for something?
HAHAHA! The umlaut works.
Arthur…how many Red Bulls have you drunk today?? Just curious…
[Geordie accent]
Not enough or too much? You decide!
[/Geordie accent]
Am I too active? Too much hectic? In one word: Fruitcake?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
*squeeze*
You’re just being especially hilarious today.
Thank you very much. But I should quit while things are good. See you tomorrow!
Going out on a high note. Just like George Costanza.
*agrees*
*shakes head*
Tisk tisk. The language here…
*secretly looks up all shortcut key for special characters*
This should be kept from trolls though.
Test again
fúck.
There’s a hole in their filter, their filter, their filter,
There’s a hole in their filter, Dear System, a hole.
Everybody sing!
*läughs öut löud*
*sobs*
They threw an umlaut party and didn’t invite me.
*sobs*
Dön’t wörry, Jȕdy. Everybödy is invited tö the pärty!
Except you!
The trolls really should stop talking to themselves.
The who?
Where? Are they playing here? When’s the concert?
Nest fail?
Always.
Doh! Double-fail! It sucks to be me!
This is not a microphone.
Wow, no one even realized he could have simply meant “I need a [GOOD] microphone god dammit!”
After 500+ comments… sigh
No one cared.
Not one cared.
NEW CLICKIE!!! UK Idol must actively look for these people
*ahem*
Let’s try that again, shall we?
Apparently in a minute while I go find it again. My computer crashed and I lost the copy/paste. Grrrrr!
OK, let’s see if THIS works.
It’s a helluva surprise.
Ok, um, WHAT? What was that?
Was it a really young trendy looking boy? Singing opera? In soprano?
Yes, yes and yes. Then one thing remains… how?
I have no idea but Simon says something about it being like seeing and hearing a dog meow. I think it’s more like a crocodile meowing. Susan Boyle this kid is not.
Mmm Bolognese sauce, one of my favo(u)rites. Now to continue the pun run I intended, zero one cared.
just so you know for sure that I was not correcting you.
SIX HUNDRED AND SEVENTH!
Yupp. THats defo a massive fail!
Jesus, what’s with the amount of shitty spam in these comment sections? I want to read some comments relevant to the video, not clarification that the comment section in itself is fail.
Ah ha. Retread
There’s still a failblog intro in this video.
Why are you not removing it?
i’m bored
WHERE’s MY MICROPHOOONNNEEE!!!!????
o wait… hehe *embarrassed*
Ron Magers FTW… nice to see they’ve hired more loons to surround him, since John Coleman moved to San Diego.
poor Boston
did he die?
Hahah, yah…we can hear you clearly.
this isnt funny guys, andy shaw died
shaw’s dead, isn’t he?