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First
First to fail!
And I think your nick is spelled j-troll
NO its j-roll trust me
J-Roll stands for Jeez Right off lazy lickers
i think
(not funny the truth)
I thought it was a reference to Jimmy Rollins, the SS for the Phillies.
It just makes me want sushi. What do you think a j-roll would be in sushi?
Jellyfish
(unpalatable and irritating when stepped on)
Well…thanks for ruining that for me!
*hands Ms B a bowl of sesame seaweed salad*
Yum! Thanks!
Edamame?
*offers*
MMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmm. Tanks!
Thanks!
*squeezes, salts*
Heee!
That lack of refresh worked out better than expected!
*SMOOCH!*
Um, no.
what does his name mean? english is not my native language
so i dont get it
It’s greek in fact, so none of us understand(s)(?)
@xazz
If you say “Mike Litoris” out loud, it sounds like “my clitoris”.
I didn’t get that at first either… But now I am still laughing
lol
Mike Litoris sounds like my clitoris if you say it slowly.
ha, my clittoris.
mike litoris
my clitoris???
any left? DAMMIT, thanks for saving some….I’m just gonna…take this home….th…thanks.
oh btw is there a way to make it so it remembers your name and jizz? (yes i have an account)
It stands for jelly rol!
Ballfish
The more you hate the first-ers, the more they will keep at it
Poor guy! HAHAHA!
What an unfortunate name!
What a gigantic head…
What an odd space between his teeth…
ummmm, what do you spose might fit in that space?
Mike Litoris?
*looks at ceiling*
Ooh! Check out the footprints on the ceiling!
Those kids need to be caught for breaking the law
wow, that was the only heartfelt comment on all of failblog, and you just ruined it. thanks a lot guys
*runs to mother*
*cries openly*
OMG!!
*tickles velvet whilst she’s looking at ceiling*
*giggle*cough*giggle*cough*
.
Stop that! I’m having a tough enough time breathing here.
Aww.
*makes velvet some tea with honey and lemon*
*finds breathing overrated*
can i have some tea? plz?
*looks at shoes*
At least his name isn’t Mike Hunt
Yeah, after his debut he was quickly replaced by Waldo
HAHAHA!
Hahaha that made me laugh IRL
Yep. Lives just up the street from Mike Hunt.
That would be Beaver Dick Lane would it?
http://failblog.org/2009/05/01/street-name-fail-4/
My CLITORIS
A piece of corn!
I love CORN!!!!! not on the cob
a piece of porn
a fleece is born!
a life is torn!
a wife is scorned!
a niece is worn
A sheep is worn!
a Duck is worn!
A funny stretch of comments just got reeeeeeeeeealy old.
What an odd space between your ears.
i used to work with someone named mike hunt – i feel better knowing he isnt alone in this world.
Howsomever … Has no questioned his middle initial yet? Perhaps a C? *ducks*
*slips ‘one’ between no and questioned, while in camoflauge and still ducking*
I was about to make a ‘one fell swoop’ joke, until I realized just how dyslexic I am…
I was about to make a ‘one fell swoop’ joke until I realized just how dyslexic I am…
Or he could have been just being an idiot giving the reporters a fake name…
Yeah that’s what I think. I had a friend do Mike Hunt when he was interviewed by a reporter when his neighbors house burned down.
I still laughed though heh.
Or he could have been just being an idiot giving the reporters a fake name…
what the heck i dont get it
At least his name isn’t Lou Stwat. *squeeze*
*squeeze*
*squeeze* Good morning Malicite.
Long time no see Mr. Cuddles!
I was on for a little bit yesterday, but work has been pretty busy the past few days.
Work is overrated anyway :/
Yea it is. BTW clickie ^ for a really funny website! It’s had me in tears all morning!
LOL cuddles! Love it!
I’m glad you like it! *squeeze*
865 is my area code. But…no, it wasn’t me.
I saw this about a week ago, but I dunno if it is real…
It is. I’ve submitted texts to the website lol.
lol. I never get any funny texts :/
*texts Malicite the Funniest Joke in the World*
*drops dead laughing after reading it*
*thud*
Remember the funniest joke in the world, according to the Monty Python’s flying circus? “My dog doesn’t have a nose.” “How does it smell, then?” “Terribly.”
And people dropped dead
Maybe it’s terrible, don’t blame me, English isn’t my first language
Terrbily is an adverb and terribe is an adjective, MAYBE MY CHOICE OF WORDS RUINED THE ENTIRE JOKE? Well, well
I get ridiculous texts from my cousin when she’s drunk like
“I’ll eat your babies Bitch!” and
“My vagine hangs like a wizard sleeve!!!”
Perhaps the whisky I got two days ago still is in effect? *hic*
Mr. Cuddles has babies!?
*gets a text from Brewski*
Ha..hahahaha!!! *falls over dead*
*rejoices over all the company he’s now getting*
Welcome, welcome all!
I think she’s all that and a bag of skittles …
but I’m not tasting the rainbow.
.
I seriously LOLed at that one! Unfortunately, it scared some people in the cemetary … why are the living so skittish around laughing zombies anyway?
LOL CUDDLES thats freaking hilarious.
thanks for that.
I wonder if he knows Mike Hunt?
*silly squeeze*
Or Ben Dover? *giggly squeeze*
bend over and ill show you ben dover!
You’re memorializing the wrong troll there, bub.
hmmm maybe *masturbates* ?
There you go.
The correct spelling is β∈и∂ ∘∨∃r.
I’d say they are related.
Probably live next door to each other, too.
Actually I believe that Mike Litoris lives in the apartment above Mike Hunt.
That residence has been confirmed, but some men still need a map.
*throws map into backseat* It’s no where I’ll ever be visiting! *drives off to Mike Hawk’s place*
LOL Mookie – I’ve heard that’s true
*ponders a new national tattoo franchise*
ROFL
Damn! You guys beat me to it with Mike Hunt!
And right across the street is the not-so-fancy chinese restaurant called Mai Dik
There was a Chinese restaurant called “Thang Long” close to where I used to live…
Mike Hawk is Mike Litoris’ next door neighbor.
In the same neighborhood as Mike Rotch.
group *squeeze* Wow..now I can’t even think that name without….yea.
*changes topic to get her mind out of the gutter* Say Irish Wristwatch!
*puts Anniebunny’s mind back inna gutter just to see what happens*
How’d i get back in here?? ohhh is that Antonio Banderas?! *drops mind, chases Antonio*
hehehe…
I knew it’d be a Good Thing!
My name is Antonio Banderas.
You killed my father.
Prepare to die.
*awaits the arrival of more dead*
That is NOT my pet name!
*squeeze* Hey Mookie!
Did that rub you the wrong way?
*squeezes for everyone*
Yes. Fortunately, Lou doesn’t.
Lol!
Yowzer. Wax is your friend, Mike.
Wax on? *whacks off*
His best friends are Mike Hawk and Heywood Jablomie.
Don’t forget Mike Hunt and his Irish friend Phil McKrackin.
And Dick Gazinya.
His wife’s name in Pink Litoris
Seems like fake
It does, unfortunately.
Fake or not, it’s still funny.
It reeks of photoshopness. The colors of the fonts are different— waaaayy different.
I hate to be one of those crying “photoshop” but it really does kinda ruin the funny IMO when you can tell it’s faked.
It doesn’t reek of photoshop at all. It’s not a screengrab, it’s a photo of a TV – you aren’t going to get perfect consistent colours.
By fake, I think Failtruza meant the guy told the media a fake name, not that the picture is faked.
No, I’m pretty sure the guy was photoshopped in. The name is real, the person isn’t.
No no…that’s not the real Chandler Bing…just his southern cousin.
Agreed. Considering every single google hit on his name results in an article about this picture, I’d say, yes, it’s fake.
Yet oddly enough when I look him up I find a phone listing for Mike Litoris in Norcross, Georgia. Perhaps we should give him a call and tell him he’s fake.
Smells like steak? Sorry, I’m hungry, espcially after this Fail
So, what about Mike Litoris?
I’m sure it’s fine.
Dunno – never seen it, personally.
But I suspect it’s fine
LOL Starfish – great minds! ^5
LOL too funny.
Starfish and Nellie = silly and funny *squeeze*
In that order?
For now. I reserve the right to change the order if I so deem it.
*squeeze*
Well, I just don’t enjoy discussions about Mike Litoris all over the web. It’s devastating.
Don’t let it get to you LEILA – remember the Timex slogan…
Something about ticking and licking?
That would be the one
How about the Secret deoderant slogan?
Strong enough for a man but…oh heck, I don’t know.
I can’t breathe from laughing…you guys are killing me!
Srrsly srry, Srrsly Srry!
We didn’t mean you N eHarm
I love Mike Litoris!
No wonder the banks are in trouble…if Mike Litoris can become a homeowner.
Why, does it have bad credit?
Turns out the exit fee on that arrangement was massive.
Penalty for early withdrawal.
My favorite comment yet today, Starfish!
*worries about the deposit*
One lump sum.
what a mess
I think it declared bankruptcy.
It came with a high interest rate.
Strangely, if you look at his squinty eyes and tilt your head a bit…
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!!!!
You saw it, too?
Yes I did.
No comment.
What? Just, you know, the irony of it all.
Haha innuendo win
Woa! i didn’t notice there was a new fail.
I am sorry I forgot to fetch you from the previous fail.
Apology accepted.
what about his clitoris?
WTF? No one is talking about his clitoris. Sheesh!!!!
Ah, maybe because it’s just wrong to talk about a mans clitoris.
But hey! who cares? Proceed my dead Leila
Urgh. Everytime i try to call you ‘dear’ i type dead.
Necrophilia?
Now that’s just creepy, even for me! Go screw yourselves, you living folk!
.
LET US DEAD REST!
.
*wonders if Hairy is just teasing me at this point*
Wow. Hell of a typo.
I noticed.
Freudian slip…please keep an eye on Hairy for me……..I think he means me some eHarm.
Ah, no I don’t. It’s just the combination of words that stricks me every time.
*sharpens his blade*
I really don’t
Where is Ninja when you need him?
if this is indeed real, i wonder if he realizes how his name sounds.
I’m pretty sure he’d figure it out.
I dunno. Maybe he doesn’t know what a clitoris is. Those scraggly teeth and that facial hair won’t exactly attract any ladies.
Ah, but there is always someone … for everyone.
He shouldn’t shorten his name. Should be Michael Litoris. I think it’s a parent FAIL in my mind.
Say that fast enough and it’ll still sound like “My Clitoris.”
Yep.
Who is going to say a name like that fast?
Well, maybe he DID have clitoris at one point. His name is a way of being upfront about it.
Those sex change operations are getting more amazing all the time…
NATGEO was so close to showing the whole procedure once. YIKES!!! I am a woman and I don’t know how a man can let his penis get sliced and diced and formed into something…I don’t even know what the end product is.
Ever seen a sausage in batter? I imagine it’d look similar to that.
I’m also hearing the word ‘lick’ in Michael Litoris… Probably just me though.
Forget licking anything else right now. Got any chocolate cake?
Is Entenmann’s fudge cake okay with you?
I don’t know what that is but since that’s all you have then I will take it.
Trust me – if it’s Entenmanns – you want it! Yummola!
I bought it after a meeting with my accountant – I needed to relieve the stress of submitting income tax 2 years late
You’re pretty good managing stress then – I would need something stronger than Entenmanns after that!
either that or someone would figure it out for him.
If it’s pronounced the way the name is pronounced where I live (and by the looks of the background in that screenshot, he might actually be from my city), it’s pronounced something akin to luh-TORE-us.
Excuse me while I fail myself. I missed four words in your post, and read it as “I wonder how his name sounds.” I blame the migraine.
Boy, what a pussy.
There is just no way that’s his real name. Nice joke though.
At least his name is not Chris Litoris…
Or penni S. C. litoris.
I’m hungry. The 2 oranges where not enough for me..
Maybe Mike Litorus has something to chew on
Ah, no thanks. I’ve got a soup from the cantine already.
I don’t get it. Would someone please explain?
Mike Litoris = My clitoris
Don’t tell the ginger you!
Who let the G I N G E R in here?
A homeowner (= homo-ner). xD
What a wise and well over thought comment! BRAVO! *claps*
Thx.
So this is what we were supposed to find? What’s the big deal?
Nature’s rubix cube my ass.
He has a boat, too.
?
Pray explain.
Well, lets put it this way…
If he goes out in it, the boat is a larger vessel that contains Mike Litoris.
At least I assume that’s what Aja meant…
Most men think about sex all the time, but Dutch men think about boats.
Well, as the saying here goes, “Whatever floats your boat!”
Apparently our future king is an expert on water management.
Right. He’s also very little.
LOL! You dry, dry bugger
Nothing a little BaconLube won’t help with!
*backs slowly away from monitor*
Come back here! You wimp. We won’t hurt you. Much.
I much prefer spray cheese to fix my lubrication needs.
Parents win.
Google “litoris ktvu”. It was the name the guy gave the news crew. However trying to find other records of that name comes up empty, so he likely did make it up. Still a bit of a fail by the news channel to not notice the joke being played on them.
Nice deduction professor buzzkill. How long did you have to study to become that stupid, or does it come naturally to you?
Needs a shave.
needs a new life
*needs a new death*
*always*
REPOSTÂ FAIL.
This is so OLD…
Who cares? It is a new comment page full of fun! WIiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!
*joins in the fun&
Whoo-hoo!!!!
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAWWWWWWWWWW!!!
LEEEEEROOOOYYYY JEEEEEENKIIIIINSSS
You’re old, too. So that means none of your posts are funny anymore.
Am I the only one wondering how big his clitoris must be?
Soup warms your soul!
Not as much as beer.
Not as much as chocolate!
Frying pan warms your sole
A bed of hot coals warms your sole.
Frying pans just hurt the head.
Beer is food.
Soup – zombies don’t like soup.
(we have our reasons)
Questions?
“Is this Moe’s Tavern? I’d like to speak to a Mr. Litoris. First name Mike.”
Win.
Whoa Nilla!!
Nilla? Last name Wafers? I love you in ‘Milk’!
I get that joke a lot. Yet I have no idea what Nilla Wafers are xD
This reminds me of the Peter File joke.
Peter File = petrified? Oo
Um…..no.
No. Peter File = Pedophile, its a joke on the IT crowd. But I heard Americans pronounce it “Ped a file” so it doesn’t work there, here its pronounced “Peed o file” which when Peter File is said quick enough, sounds like that.
Explaining things make them less funny.
when you get them, it does make them less funny. when you don’t, it might open new possibilities.
i got it, but explaining jokes is underrated.
While Mr. Litoris here may be a fake, I grew up with a Michael Hunt. Always Michael. Never Mike.
Not his mother’s fault, directly. She remarried when he was young.
Some parents can be cruel. I went to school with a Robin Hood (female).
I know a guy with the last name Bates. People in high school would call him Master…
I work with a guy named Justin Teim. Too bad he’s always late.
Since we’re on the topic of interesting names (given by hippie parents on LSD I guess) …
.
I once knew someone with the last name of Marrow. First name Tom. True story!
im a parent, done lsd and a bit hippie yes, and never would come up with that nor on lsd or anything….
this is just parents with poor reasoning, conective or dedutive abilities.
for our amusement…
there are some real names i know. but make sense in my country and language.
so is “explaning a joke” a theme? or i just flush the toilet with those
*flushes*
dude this is nothing my friends dad’s name is mike hunt yeah say that fast and see what it sounds like lol
OMG! LOL! I never heard of that before!
I’m glad I just emerged from the cave I’ve been living in for 50 years.
How’s his brother York?
york might as well be the brillinat of the family and developed sinister ways of anullating the capacity of reading post at leasat to the half… to see we all know how it sounds…
so york might be making money huh?? maybe he provides them withplaces with pleasures inside and charges, or only makes good pr0n so the kids only have time to watch the image and post a crap that has been posted before…
haaaaaaa…. get a name
Holy smokes!! It’s 5:30PM time for me to go home! yaaay! My weekend starts early this week! Till monday. From teusday Till next monday i will not be here, but in the hospital..
BYE!
Your butt will be on my mind, Sjors. Happy surgery!
Nice Asshat Judy.
Take care Hairy
lawl
noob here, but indeed, take care.
it took me a minute but then i was like rofl+lmao+omgwtfbacon? which equals mental breakdown incase u were wondering…..
Bart: Hey, I’m looking for a Mr. Litoris. First name Mike.
Moe: Let me check. Hey everybody! Mike Litoris. I’m looking for Mike Litoris. Has anybody seen Mike Litoris?
“I believe it is found under the counter, Ms. Moe”
I even managed to rhyme it, WIN
I don’t think that one would have made it past the censors!
agree
Where does Mike live? My wife keeps telling me I need to find him.
Mofo, my friend, thank you for making me laugh hard.
Your wife is lucky to have such a tentative hubby
Erm…did you mean “attentive” there…?
‘Coz the way you said it is HIGH-larious!
Nope. I meant tentative, as in done without confidence
In that case…
…I don’t get it. :p
I can’t believe my eyes !
*takes screenshot of Dragonwriter’s comment*
(Pssst, I don’t get it either)
Tentative as in pitching a tent?
I gotta keep folks on their toes, yanno!
1′d for being win, again.
Wow, this guy is actually real, and He’s the only one in the U.S.
http://www.whitepages.com/search/FindPerson?extra_listing=mixed&form_mode=opt_b&post_back=1&firstname_begins_with=1&firstname=&name=litoris&street=&city_zip=&state_id=&localtime=survey
i think this is more of a win because i doubt thats his real name. kinda like “mike hawk” or “mike hunt”. its just funny that he got the news to put that on tv. but it that is his real name then yes, fail.
I’m sorry to ask, and I know this must be an annoying question, but how do I get a custom avatar?
Go to gravatar.com and sign up
Not annoying at all…
Don’t do it! They make you do… things.
*sobs*
Still suffering from the mental scars, Arthur?
And the physical. The horror…
Mike Auck.
You misspelled “Hawk”.
*wonders if he just destroyed someone’s self-esteem, having outsmarted him despite being DEAD*
Good luck to Loma R.! You’ll win the Kindle, I’m sure!
?
By the way, have this.
*gives mouth mask*
Thanks? Why do I need it?
(This money-failure contest. It’s over for weeks, but someone posted there some minutes ago.)
I thought panic would have kicked in by now in Germany?
*partially unzips hermetically-sealed full-body suit*
Is it safe to breathe yet?
The media is working on that. So far without effect as far as I’m concerned.
I think your right *removes gas mask*, unless you consider nausia, loss of limb, gender confusion and blindness effects. Do you think I should see a doctor about this?
*wonders how czuhc would feel if he started handing out condoms*
I get it now.
Dude that guy lives here in the San Francisco Bay Area lolz. That’s KTVU Fox 2’s logo.
that guy is hot! i want me some mike.
Is he related to Heywood Jablome in any way?
I thought he was related to Gaywood Cablon’ in many ways…
Sorry. You are indeed correct. I checked his family history.
On another note, is Gaywood Cablon’ releated to Mi C. Rotch?
Could have been worse. His parents could have named him Chris, Then’d he’d be C. Litoris
he he.. more like homo-ner.
name fail? r u kidding? major win here!
His friends call him Mulva.
This name reminds me of those pranks Bart Simpson pulls on Moe.
(e.g. Mike Rotch, Mike Rotch, has anybody seen Mike Rotch??)
Hugh Jazz was the best one because he was actually there!
I bet he said that on purpose and his real name is Joe Smith. He’s just really cool for saying his name is Mike Litoris!
WIN.
And his wife is called Dolores.
Old shit
I dont get it.
I would say less “name fail” and more “spotting a fake name fail”. The person who took his name, the people who produced the interview, and the person who made the graphic at the bottom… not one noticed.
that’s a good one, yeah
*claps*
failsauce. bahahahahhahahahah.
The TOFU license plate got rejected, but somehow this name went through hospital staff and county records without being stopped?
On the other hand, newscasters rarely ask for ID when taking short interviews, so no doubt this guy gave a fake name.
YAY I FINALLY GOT IT!!!!
(o) (o)
>-Y-<
^
Compyooter cat is watching me masturbate!
Well at least his name isn’t Mike Ballsacs
OMG ITS KTVU CHANNEL TWO! SF! SF!
haha but srsly that sux
LOL! i finally get it!
its supposed to be “my clitoris”
lol thats funny, took me like 5 mins to get it tho
Actually, that’s a Name WIn!
I don’t get it, sadly. I FAIL!!
me either so dont worry (:
Mike Litoris = My Clitoris
You need to slur the name to get it. Or have a naturally dirty mind, which is most of us. Except me. I’m as pure as the driven snow.
…Did you say the driven in snow?
*innocent look*
The look may be innocent, but that is the only thing. *levels steely gaze*
“…driven in…”, that is a tired joke.
*lower lip trembles*
*eyes fill with tears*
*dries the tracks of your tears*
*smoooch!*
There there. *gives freshly baked Mint Chocolate Chip cookies and a glass of milk to wash it down* Damn, I am so easy.
I’m as pure as driven slush.
I think Mae West said that. It works for me though.
I’ve never driven slush. I’ve only driven cars, vans and buses.
*sigh* Fine. THE driven slush.
Where was it driven too?
Degradation.
I thought sloth was the first big step on the road to degradation.
I think that’s lust.
Not in River City.
Say it out loud: (My clitoris)
Also, in the event that this really is the guy’s name (which I doubt) this is a Name Win.
i really doubt thats his real name, but i guess you never know
I’d say this is a win.
I’d say less “name fail” and more “fake name win”. lol
It’s Latin. The guy’s name literally means “Mike of the shore”.
Ha, that’s great!
I actually know a guy who’s name is Mike Hunt. These two should meet.
MY CLITORIS!CLITORISCLITORISCLITORISCLITORISCLITORISCLITORISCLITORISCLITORIS
Porn name win!
I SENT THIS TO YOU GUYS 2 MONTHS AGO!!!!!
WRONG POST FAIL
this guy looks familiar…
… i don’t get it
There is such a guy, I found him in the phone book. I wonder if he changes the name himself though
i dont get it….
would someone please explain to me?
Hi I like html
I have to argue that this is actually a WIN
Name win.
News report fact check and edit fail.
I correct myself, still a name win. But no fail on the fact check or edit as this is likely the dude’s real name:
http://preview.ussearch.com/preview/ala/newsearch?&searchLName=litoris&searchFName=mike&adID=009-0000000005&adsource=9&TID=0&searchtab=people
(copy and paste for link)
He probably married Connie Lingus. Hope she didn’t take his last name
Fake name win!
Haha. Do you think he’s friends with Mike Hunt??
i think he’s friends with Herb Reathstinks, Eric Shun and Mike Rakhabit
man, i dont get it o_o
Say it slowly. Mike Litoris. Mi Ke Litoris. My Clitoris.
This is obviously photoshopped becasue the font changes
i dont get it
Try saying it out loud.
lol It took me a minute to get it
MIIIIIIIKE.
Mom look! Mike Litoris is on TV!!
I wonder if he’s friends with Willie Stroker?
WEll i think its more fail that hes a home owner yetttt, LOOK BEHIND HIm NOOO HOME OHH NOOOOOESS!!!!!!
*queitly slips from behind lols desk and make an attemp at unsticking his ‘T’ and ‘O’ keys*
*then slips back into the darkness while quickly putting an ‘S’ behind the word ‘MAKE’ above*
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
EDIT FAIL
I dont get it……..
say his name out loud , really really fast
hahaha Name Win XD
Oh puh-lease. You know he gave a fake name. Everybody knows that. He might as well have just gone with “Mike Hunt.”
This is a fail on the part of the news station.
Not bad as his wife name, Carolyn litoris.
HAHAHAHA NO WAY! Was this seriously on tv?
I call “no way”!
#46
i dont get it….
I’ll betcha there are more Mipe Enis’s who are homeowers…just a guess.
He even has a fanpage ! http://www.facebook.com/pages/Mike-Litoris/48073803436?sid=73ad1791e9d3f0031b4eaf5678e805a6&ref=search
And nobody believes me whenever I say I see so many trolls on television.
That’s the kind of name that’s PERFECT for prank calls. The poor bastard.
Just had some at NoBoobs in Tribeca. Chastity the new proud owner. EVERYONE was there.
how is this a fail…?
lol did the parents not notice
poor guy must have had abuse
I wonder if he’s related to Mike Hunt?
Ya, and also a good friend of Mike Hawk
roflmao some names really are stupid xD
his parents dont love him i think