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Suck it J-Troll
J-Troll?
Pretty sure that’s Trabek’s failblog alias.
Suck it long and suck it hard.
I like bananas
Daylight come and me wan’ go home.
It’s bananas. B AN AN AS.
These bananas B AN AN AS
B AN ANAS? butt, butt … the worms! ewwwwwwwww
What what in the butt butt? Bananas you say?
Ha HA
none of any of that conversation made anything resembling sense. also…. B AN AN AS!!!!!!
potatoes = no longer the rage
*apologizes for being cheeky*
Who’s Anas, and why do we want to ban her?
looooooool
best fail so far!
do his beauty queen wife and take the money.
its a fail-win-win-fail
He also found out his wife is a cheeting whore and his children aren’t his. Another fail-win.
Especially when it comes to the child support payments.
Why did the husband not check if his “beauty queen” wife can even have babies before going to his neighbor for help?
It was the beauty queen’s idea. She gets laid plus she splits the money with the neighboor.
Maybe they did and the wife can have babies. She just can’t get pregnant if the man is sterile. With a fertile man, she can…
Komm schon, ein sehr schönes Fail!
dude six months of trying that is awesome
Not fun for the hubby.
Yeah, ptoohey to the turkey baster, go straight for the neighbour?!?! Sorry, zero sympathy here. (but he gets points for persevering with a project for 6 months!)
That’s 6 months of hard labor.
The competition was stiff, but he beat it.
He did rise to the occasion.
That’s the long and short of it.
That brings a new meaning to the term “take this job and shove it”.
Or a new term to the meaning “take this job and love it.”
He was cock-sure it was going to work!
Also headstrong.
He came out on top after all.
Top o’ the mornin’, everyone!
Yes, except for a stroke of hard luck.
(Mornin’!)
It’s hard to be a good neighbor…
*snerk*
It’s good to be a hard neighbor…
[spit-take] 8-{p} *wipes off monitor*
It’s good to be a hard neighbor.
Missed it by… that much.
Too much is never enough.
Well, the ball’s in her court.
*removes Dragon’s apostrophe*
*puts apostrophe back*
THWACK!!!
They ballsed that up big time.
*strews balls and apostrophes randomly*
Please use only as directed.
Ah, but that would also create a fragment WN.
*Adds a “now.” to the end of Dragon’s newly created fragment.”
There is no “newly created fragment”…because my sentence was perfectly fine just as it was!
…Thanks for taking care of that for me, Ms B. *squeeze*
*Puts Dragon’s apostrophe back*
actually the apostrophe is correctly placed… it’s a contraction of “the ball is” and is therefore correct. apostrophe removal fail.
*gasp* Someone corrected Dragon! Ignorant, ignorant fools!
And now for something completely different..
I’m a lumberjack and I’m ok…
Wearing high heels and hanging around in bars doesn’t tend to get your wife pregnant either.
It would if she was drinking alcohol.
Wink wink, nudge nudge!
Is she a….go’er?
Say no more, say no more.
I will say no … oops. Kindly pass me the duct tape, please.
Can we still type, then? That would be lovely.
a nod’s as good as a wink to a blind bat eh eh?
No no no no.
I would like a fish license, please…
Strike 72! You’re out!
72 times in 6 months? Lazy man.
2-3 times a week? must’ve been a weekend job.
He should be laid off.
He had his wife as well.
She had a guy on the side too.
*stifles smirk, stands to attention*
*abandons centurian ref*
Her name was Incontinentia. . .
Did you just laugh?
And she should be laid on.
Maybe she failed to lay an egg.
No one to egg her on.
Makin’ bacon wasn’t working…
Baconlube was unavailable?
She wasn’t open to it.
Well, she had to have been a bit cracked to think she’d pull that off in the long run.
*marvels that nobody has made a potato reference yet*
*potato reference*
Surprise!
*Takes a bite of potato surprise*
*gags and spits*
Ptew!!! Yuk, where has that potato been?
I’ll give you a hint: There were worms there too.
In your ear!? :O
She was open, he was hopin’, but alas, they got eggzackly no pin.
*argh*
*headesk*
ow
*applaudes, tosses roses* Bravo!
*bows*
*accidenty hits head on desk*
*possibly knocked self out this time*
*LOVES the roses, nonetheless*
Damn. Knew I should have learned to curtsey.
*combs internet for Curtsey Classes*
*signs her up to a lucrative contract* This’ll only take six months.
*bids adieu*
*reads fine print*
*realizes forgot glasses*
*brings wine anyway*
*asks silly question*
But does it cover all 72 times, sir?
*or was that 79?* ARTHUR!?!?!
Come to think of it, she was.
*giggle* I said ‘come.’
BTW, I’ve been meaning to ask: are you, in fact, a “swell foop”?
Only if I ingest too much salt. And thank you for asking.
I WANT THAT JOB!!!!
Seconded
I agree, but only if said woman is of Asian descent. I ain’t picky, that’s just how things go….
I think the real fail here was Frank’s wife.
He did say he doesn’t enjoy it. 72 episodes of sheer horror.
Darwinism, bless you for stepping in at the right moments.
In the end the stupider people will always copulate more frequently than the inteligent. Reverse Darwinism is in full effect and we are all doomed.
Yep.
Guess that means we all better get to work!!
Especially if people keep eating all the gifted children
You’re right we need a policy shift…
How about eating offspring of the ICHC gang?
I don’t think I could stomach that. Gifted children just taste better!
Wow. No wonder I never had any friends that understood me when I was growing up. They all got eaten!
More frequently than the what, now?
Maybe Darwinism is working there
*points*
*sighs*
I was meant to be pointing at that end
*points at that end*
link?
Blink?
Think?
Drink?
Nuffink. Nobody gave me tea yet! *waits longer before making a complaint*
*delivers 72 ‘cups of tea’*
You forgot your teabag.
Just like buses! *sigh*
Careful, DrB, sir. Tea Totaller advises, any number over 71 means jam could drown in teapee! Not good.
I asked what kind, but you were in the wrong thread!
*peruses tea selection on shelf*
You didn’t give me the right options.
*invites to English breakfast*
*drinks tea with pinkie sticking out*
*puts on my deepest truck driver voice*
Wudja like a bacon buttie luv?
Clink?
Mink?
*slink*
*wink*
*pink*
I stink not.
*nods* rink hot.
*mink*
*ratfink*
*zink*
I Must Refresh.
I shall refurbish. More tea, jam?
I could go for some coffee instead; do you have that?
(_)o Just for you, dear symbol-I-cannot-hope-to-replicate-but-love-anyway.
dink?
orange. Ha!
Why ORANGE you be an idiot still?HA HA HA HAR HAR HAR HAR!!!!
*sad, need to cuddle*
*squeeze*
It’s okay!
*pat pat*
*jammy squeezes sofaking*
Fake! Funny though..
It’s real.
Well, it’s original newssource isn’t quite reputable (being a german gossip tabloid), but given that it’s supposedly going to court it should be easy enough to check if you’re german.
WHICH german gossip tabloid?? Google for the names – you’ll get dozens of hits in English, and a single German one who links back to an English source.
Yup, it’s a fake.
Could be, but it was reported on NPR’s news/comedy hour this weekend as the real story, and the woman who guessed it correctly totally got Carl Kasell’s voice on her home answering machine.
12th Suck it bitches
I think not.
no fake, read it on German news a week ago. Will try to provide link…
I agree, WN, I always thought sp0ng3s did that sucking (it up) thing.
I’m from Stuttgart and noone called Soupoulos is listed in the phone book plus noone ever heard of this case. 7 families called Maus, noone listed as Frank.
Obviously this isn’t real.
Perhaps names were changed to preserve anonymity?
Or to protect the incense.
Yes, this is all a big lie! It were 79 attempts. And I did enjoy them.
I admire a guy who really enjoys his work!
Really hard-working, moving up in the world, eh?
And 79? Touche, I give kudos to you, Mr. Maus (pronounces “Mouse”).
Hehehe…
Obviously we should take the word of a stranger on the internet (in either case).
Word! *pumps fist once, but fails to look cool*
*apologizes to Ms. St. Clair for sheer ineptitude* (in either case)
Well you’ll just have to do better next time, won’t you?
That is so funny– brought tears to my eyes!!!
LOL I like your name, but unfortunately I cannot specify why seeing how I wish to maintain a friendly image.
Haha…. you can ask my gf later
*hands lobster girl a kleenex*
There there…
*pulls out sewing kit*
We’ll have those eye-tears patched up right now in a minute.
Oh dear, you meant occular duct induced moisture, not fissures in said occs, didn’t you?
So sorry. My misunderreading. Carry on.
Those aren't tears! You're being Steamed!*Melts Butter, Puts on Bib!*Down BOGGY!!! DOWN!!! Bad BOGGY!!!! We do NOT eat fellow bloggers.
Since when??
I think they’re more easily digestible after being stomped.
Brewski, you are thinking of trolls in which I would have NO objections.
*sneaks in to replace Leila’s ‘in’ with a ‘to’*
*throws in ‘the consuming of’ between ‘of’ and ‘trolls’ and quickly inserts a comma after trolls (if correct)*
*realizes own comment is tl;dr*
*headdesk*
ow
You seem to be having a problem with your desk being too close to your head.
*proffers a cushion to foop*
*Re-forwards office memo to Nellie*
*intercepts forwarded memo*
This is an akward situation
Adjust the angle.
Take off the lens cap.
Load the film.
Don’t over-expose.
I’d like a Copy of each of the 72 Attempts on DVD please.
You’re really into horror movies, then eh?
A Canadian!Did anyone remember the tripod?
Don’t worry, it gets easier the more you try.
It also gets sleazier the more you pry.
PHOTOSHOPPED
Honestly, no woman born after 1902 has the name “Traute”. And “Frank Maus” is rather ridicolous as well.
Do you think that “photoshopped” equals “fake”? It doesn’t. This may very well be made up, but it’s not photoshopped.
Your comment is photoshopped as well. EVERYTHING on FailDOTorg is photoshopped. Accept it. We are being controlled, manipulated and indoctrinated by secret aliens from Planet Photoshop – and our governments hide the evidence.
*dons a tin hat*
*dons tinfoil hat and tinfoil underwear*
*fires up Faraday cage*
*looks around nervously*
*Uses Walkie Talkie to Contact WhoaNellie*
“Hey WN!”
“Have you caught any Faraday’s yet?”
“Helloooo, CAN… YOU… HEAR… ME?”
*Bangs Walkie Talkie with Palm of Hand a Few Times*
“WhoaNellie, Come in Please?”
“Are you OK in there?”
“HELLO!”
“Oh My GAWD! They’ve gotten him!”
*steps out of Faraday cage*
Oh! Skwerl! Good ta see ya – sorry, no reception in there.
What’s a Farady and why are you trying to cage them?
Get any yet?
Can you make a profit?
Are they Tasty?
Many calories?
Can I try one?
I blame ninjas. I’ve asked a ninja about his secret conspiracy to take over the world, and he refused to air my question….. that is the ultimate sign!
Conspiracy!
But how do you KNOW that the Ninja was Even There to hear
a question about the Secret Conspiracy To Take Over The World?
[SCTTOTW]
*brain melts*
Hee, hee*sneaks up on Ninja and karate chops him* Aaaa YA!!!!
You can’t sneak up on a ninja. Ninja sneaks up on you!
In Soviet Russia, um something else sneaks up on something else! ha!
‘morning jam. I was hoping he let his guard down. I believe I succeeded since he hasn’t responded. YESSSS!!!!
Afternoon LEILA.
He’s somewhere stalking you. hehe
You can’t Stalk an Iris!
Iris’s already have their very own Stalks
Careful, she’ll leave…
This is blossoming into a potential pun run.
Pun run in 3…2…1…
Don’t spring ahead to a conclusion.
You have been nothing but a thorn on my behind.
Ha, got you with the oldest trick in the book.*dusts off dummy ninja*
*Sneaks up behind ninja and lamb chops him*
Mint sauce, anyone?
*pats your shoulder and tells you it’s all going to be alright, even though I know it won’t*
*hides evidence under my potato bag*
Dog forbid anyone make up a joke!
Who kept count?
The husband found notches on the bedhead?
This entire article makes me sad.
That you were left out?
.
.
Good morning!
Morning! I think I feel most sad for the wife, Traute.
*tickles Malicite*
*pinches Arthur*
*squeezes velvet*
*giggle*
*snicker* Oh you guys!
Aren’t they just too much?!?
Or not enough!!!
I think they’re just right.
*squeeze*
You’re too kind, mighty Dragon!
*squeezes the Dragon*
I have news.
*squeezes everyone back*
Well, what is it?
Aw man I hate shooting Blanks…
Oh and I am Super first yet again… I always fail!
Don’t worry, it happens to everyone.
What’s so important about being first?
And sometimes I wish I could shoot blanks, seeing how I was too cheap to buy condoms last time and we nearly did something bad…. lol
Don’t worry; I’ve since changed my cheap ass ways
Rubbers, anyone? Better to be safe than sorry!
Every time Mrs. Starfish and I have sex I yell out “First”, she doesn’t think it’s funny either.
how do starfish have sex? Tentacles…??
Alot of sucking goes on.
Oh, I just had involuntary muscle spasm!
Barring any testicle difficulties … well, that’s what I heard, anyway.
Oh balls! I meant to say technical. Didn’t I?
We’ll believe you. O.o
I recommend Mr. J’s homemade condoms. The 11th one is free …?
But I already paid for these; I’m not about to throw them away.
Or, here’s a crazy idea: What if I use them all? It’s completely farfetched, but it just MIGHT WORK!!!
Where’s the fail? If this is true, everyone wins except for Mr. Soupolos.
Well, stupid Mr. Soupolos should have just wife swapped! Then he could have saved all that money and gotten laid 72 times by the obviously hot to trot tramp Mrs. Maus!
Two seconds and Google shows this to be an April Fools prank.
Fail!
Three seconds and it proves to be space aliens; yet again.
Four seconds and it’s porn. I love the internet!
*peeks over Arthur’s shoulder at his computer monitor*
Five is alive!
Six and it’s sex!
Seven and it’s heaven! <3
Eight and she’s late!
For nine, it’s fine!
Ten and it’s done!
Oh, thank heaven for 7-Eleven.
Stop playing with yourself!
Only for the guy, really.
But seven is heaven.
Must. Refresh.
*slathers deodorant on Dragon’s armpits* Feel refreshed?
I’d ask first.
Great heavens…a drive-by deodoranting!
*sniff…sniffsniff…*
I stink purdy now!
Internet Rule #34: Generally accepted internet rule that states that pornography or sexually related material exists for any conceivable subject. And if you say that a porn of said subject does not exist; (A) You haven’t searched deep enough. OR (B) It’s still in production, come back tomorrow!
I’ll just be awaiting for the download link.
It’s an april fool’s joke from a german newspaper. No idea why people say it’s real.
Yep. That dude’s wife was never gonna get pregnant in the butt.
Facials were also the wrong thing to do.
He was a washer the whole time too.
Can’t get pregnant by ingesting….
*BARF*
Hey, that’s not very attractive….
Have you EVER tasted that shit?
Well, as I’ve mentioned before, my gf told me what it tasted like…. (refrains from further comments)
But I was saying it’s not very attractive to throw up all over the FailBlog forums…. they are dirty already, but we need to keep them clean for visitors and trolls! Someone go get me a mop and a tequila!
Thank you, Person With a Strange Asian Name.
And LEILA – it varies
One word for the ladies… pineapple.
Wow, I guess it does vary…. this is nowhere near close to any of the things my gf described LOL
Leila, if you wanna use the bukkit, you must make a grammatical or conventional error; otherwise, I cannot loan it to you.
aikiwaza, actually a diet w/out meat is best if you know what I mean.
Very true (rather, that’s what I heard.)
Vegan diet, pineapple juice every morning and a small glass 2 hours before the act. Never gag again.
Nellie – no details please. I am not allowed to barf in the room.
Well, unless you tell me it tastes exactly like chocolate, but even then, what do we do about the consistency?
They need pills for that.
Now there is a medical break through I can set me clock too.
Sign me up too Malicite.
*barf*
Awww…. glad I had the bukkit nearby…
can someone please tell me why we are talking about various flavors of men’s semen and consitencies thereof?
As a man, I’m really not interested in hearing about consistency of semen in my mouth…. *shudders*
Peach Cobbler.
小胖子 as a woman … ah, forget it. *shudders*
*shudders*
Too close, Leila, too close.
I will keep the bukkit close to me in case I need to barf again.
Thank you. Thank you very much.
Buttermilk and Clorox, shaken not stirred.
$2500 for 72 attempts, that’s $34.72/attempt. That’s one cheap manwho*e.
Holy crap, you’re right! If I lower my fees, I could score more jobs and thus in theory earn more money! And if I get my girlfriend to help out, we could make double the cash! It’s GENIUS!
This sounds creepy but I wonder if the husband had the previlege of watching.
He was holding the camera.
Even creepier Starfish…I wonder if he is thinking, let me memorialize my wife’s boinking by another man with this camera, shall we? Ah, memories.
Can you imagine “Hey kids, you wanna watch the video of you mom and Mr. Maus making you?”
“Not again dad!!”
*tosses r up to you*
And then the kids later can watch home movies, and one of those randomly shows up….. Oh, kids, look! This is how you came into this world! Ah, memories.
From what I heard, the soundtrack is being made into a musical.
High School Musical?
Pssst, been meaning to ask, when the occasion arises (in keeping with fail),
do you quite enjoy being
*insertlittlemusicalnotehere*just a gigoloooo*insertanotherlittlemusicalnote*
*practicing for the upcoming musical auditions*
Perhaps I should keep my current job.
*anxiously awaiting whatever comes next*
We do have an opening for a tuba. Are you interested?
Dare I ask it?
A tuba BaconLube™? Sorry, fresh out.
But I’d still like to be in the band.
I can play dead.
Hi Leila, apparently you’ve abandoned your campaign against marketing of [lubricant trademark redacted]?
‘morning Brewski!!! Have you seen the latest articles? SWINE FLU!!??!! I will let the whole world do the talking going forward…LOL
Someone had to think about it…. lol
Yeah, everyone will think I am some kind of freak now.
That’s what we love about ya! *snugs*
Awwww….
If your on FailBlog, you already qualify as a freak in some manner (but all of them good.)
Welcome to the freak show!!!!
Yay for misuse of “your”!!!
As the official administrator of the Bukkit, I suggest you keep your head submerged for a minimum of 5 seconds!
Thank you for volunteering, and I hope you return to use our product sometime soon!
My bukkit has long ago given up on me. I seem to be in it more than out.
*KERSPLORCH*
*speaking while submerged in the bukkit*
One… two… three…
Don’t worry; everyone here was thinking it, but was too afraid to ask.
Hahaha….
Next I’ll wonder if they put some adventure into it; don’t merely treat it as a job, but did they at least have fun with it? haha
Like, swinging on the chandeleir perhaps?
Sounds sexy. I KNOW! He was hanging off of it and she wrapped her legs around his waist, and then they began swinging back and forth like monkeys and OOHHHHHHH it was awesome and my imagination is running free and I apologize. I shall now put myself out of my misery.
*slaps self with a soggy waffle*
*takes soggy waffle from 小胖子 puts some maple syrup on it and feeds it to BOGGY*
MANK HOO FOO DA WUPPOL!!!*GULP*
Two words: Taiwan Basket.
I don’t know what that means, but I’d be willing to bet that you’ve seen this watching adult videos with very famous porn starfish, eh?
Yep, girls of the Echino-dorm.
Starfish, I am cautiously intrigued. What is Taiwan Basket?
It is a suspended harness designed for multiple positions, at least that’s what I’ve heard.
Since you’re a starfish, wouldn’t “lobster pot” be the proper term?
Good point. Those pots are too big, I’m not into the group thing especially inter-species relations.
*admires Starfish’s inter-species discretion*
Oh, I wouldn’t mind inter-species relations…. I’d love to do a porn star.
*stares at 小胖子 in shock and stuffs his pockets with washers for protection*
Uh huh…that’s what you heard huh?
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. (Get it, Starfish sticking to it?) I crack myself up.
At least you make someone laugh!
*squeeze*
*squeeze*
*squeeze*
*crack*
OMG. Do starfish have bones?
*chews starfish*
KERUNCH CRUNCH!!
Ummmm, Yup!BOGGY!!! NOOOO!!!! DOWN!!! Bad BOGGY!!!! *retrieves Starfish’s badly mangled tentacles and attempts to glue them back on*
Don’t worry LEILA, that was just a stunt double. No actual starfish were harmed!
Am I reading your name right as Chinese for overweight children?
No; it simply says I am the overweight boy, no plurarities intended. Although ‘zi’ means child, it can be used for younger folk, especially teens. Seeing how I am 17 and a little chubster, I am constantly referred to as xiao pangzi. Thus, I have since donned this as my alias, since, although it is useless as a Chinese name (Xiao can’t be used), foreigners don’t understand this and simply see it as a Chinese name.
Lol. My apologizes for the incorrect translation. I am more fluent in Japanese, and even then reading it is hard for me. Thank you for the correction.
Hey, I can speak some of that, too!
It’s a good translation; however, in this context, it applies only to me.
Ahh, the lack of plural counters. How I love Asian languages….
Why are they so difficult? Why can’t they be as easy as English?
English is easy? You realize that no word in the English language follows standard pronunciation or structure rules? Especially when you get to actually conjugating the damn things…. haha
Exactly.
I said it’s easy because English is spoken throughout the world practically. It has to be easy, no?
Pffffft!
Engish be BOGGY fursts langage an it's taked BOGGY Elebunty Yeers to figur outs Engish these reel goodly!You said it BOGGY. English is a bastardized mix of Elebunty different languages, so it has no rules whatsoever. I think the establishment of English as the “international language” is a global conspiracy perpetrated by English teachers.
English is considered to be one of the most difficult languages to learn to speak because of all the homonyms and synonyms. My guess is it’s the homonyms.
At least, that’s what I remember hearing about a decade ago.
Then there’s that awful side-effect: homonymphomania.
I can’t decide if you are being sarcastic here or not. For your benefit, I certainly hope so.
Stupid question alert: Why can’t Xiao be used as a name?
No idea.
Now that is hilarious!
Hello FailBlog. Wellcome to the internet. *yawn*
Hello PuZo. Thanks for inviting us.
Yay! I am one with teh intarwebz nao! :O
I feels is specialness.
Not as ’special’ as PuZo.
yawn = yanking at whatever’s nearby (??) *just wondering*
*admisters anti-ICHC vaccine to 小胖子 *
Feel better now?
A little sleepy but hungry….
*makes panda platter*
Sichuan style! FTW!
Yet another failblog thread fail. This blog engine must have the swine flu.
Panda platter??? OJECTION!!!!!!!
You misspelled “EJECTION”.
(“ERECTION”?)
*joins Brewski in the gutter*
You may object, but we will continue to eat until our stomachs are filled with panda goodness!
*Chinese government says no*
Ah, never mind….
I’d say everybody fails expect for Traute (name fail though).. she will now be able to cheat on her husband and, if busted, just look very said and say “but i was doing it for us!”.
Or, *conspiracy theory*, she WAS already having an affair with the neighbour and made the husband believe it was his idea to let her sleep with him, and they will now run away with the money *end of conspiracy theory*
A little wishful thinking in the first half of this comment? Sounds well-thought out….
DAMNIT! You sound too much like me for me to hate you for thinking of this first.
Must one say actually something in order to look very “said”? *just asking, and very very nicely, I might add* *add*
FAIL!!!
On FailBlog???
No… it can’t be!
YOU CAN’T BE SERIOUS! Then what lie have I been living this whole time? What is my purpose? To find a fail on Failblog…. that’s unheard of! WHY AM I LIVING!???
*goes emo*
IMPOSSIBLE!!!
Occasional Gigolo??? What?
Note the subject of the thread…
Nellie, I just can’t keep track of your names anymore.
I noticed you gave up opposing Baconlube.I noticed you didn’t notice that I karate chopped you earlier. So, am I forgiven?
…and, I am looking for another cause.
I noticed that you didn't notice that I just noticed that karate chop. Better go check out my reply to it.Unheard of!!!
I heard that!
Wait, this is failblog? I was looking for the site with the cute little cats saying the darnedest things.
This site? (Clicky)
OMG!! I think I have seen it all. ROFL. Thanks for the laugh.
My life is truly over now.
*sheds tear*
*drinks beer*
*scratches armpit*
*burps*
*chirps*
*slurps*
*usurps*
FAIL here? What where they thinking!!!!??? OMG!!!! *flees room screaming*
Jerry, Jerry, Jerry!
Yes, I’m sure he was miserable, sleeping with a beauty queen. But, on the other hand, maybe she smelled like ‘Traute’
Oh, That’s just fowl!!!!
Traute is fowl?
Something fishy is going on.
Or was that something fluffy?
*begins pointless investigation (later) and meanwhile, zips down to the market for milk*
Doesn’t EVERYTHING taste like chicken?
Well, actually, no. ^
hehehe…
*inserts halo over smiley*
Are we back on the subject of um…, you know, the stuff men do after they…you know?
After I “you know”, I you-know-what and you-guessed-it with you-got-it!
Darn gene splicing.
Darned ufemi…. errrm, eufemi… uh, words-substituted-for-other-words-just-to-make-me-guess!
hahahaha master of fail
hello
^^
Yay gogo gadget avatar!!
I am very happy for you. But, teff7 … Man, that’s just friggin’ scary.
Man.. I’d love to be a divorce attourney living next door to these weirdoes..
I’d love to be one of these wierdos!
That is so a win (albeit creepy) on the hired guys part!
LOL
Normally, I’d say tl;dr, but this was totally worth it!
ACH SCHEISSE! ICH HABE GEMISST!
Was that an attempt at German? I’m afraid you failed.
So many simultaneous fails. It’s gold.
Failblog FAIL. That story is fake. At least there are no german sources for this, despite this allegedly happening in germany…
Sounds machiavellian.. heard of mandragola?
this is fake, it originated in classic fun, and was posted on April 1st. it was april fool joke.
Google it a bit and you’ll see it appeared on some sites days before April 1st.
Stuttgart + american dollars = fail
pics or it didn’t happen.
What a twist!
This story has
FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE
FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE
FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE
FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE
written all over it. (Yes, 28 times.)
MANY LEVELS OF FAIL!!!
Unfortunately, the whole thing turned out to April Fool’s Joke.
And it was revealed to be a hoax where?
In the minds of sane people?
“Traute”? Her name, SRSLY, is “TRAUTE”?!
No, it’s not, as the story is fake.
I certainly never thought “Maus” could be a name either. (It’s German for mouse).
But Traute seriously proves the hoax. (Traute=trusted)
Howcome that this news shows up nowhere in the german media? Third fail is this news by iteself!!
Amerifags media, lol!
With these names it’s like a Greek tragedy. Or comedy?
Something makes me think the real father of the children was the other neighbour, dunno why.
Drama Llama
newman!
Saw this elsewhere but dated April 1st
Every one is sterile. Isn’t there anyone with a good ****?
Hmm, $2500 / 72 times = Only $35 dollars a pop…..Man, that’s a inexpensive sex!
How long did each “trial” last? Depending on whether each episode was 15 or 75 minutes long, the guy got paid between $2 and $0.50 per minute.
Either way though, its a long way above the minimum wage in either USA or Germany.
I see more than 2 fails hurr
I would call that a partial win for the neighbor. He got to have sex with a beauty pageant winner for six months!
Hey! Im from Stuttgart (Germany)!
oh my gosh, I am from stuttgart! ahaha
Holy crap, fails all around in this one.
too funny.. too surreal… this was an april’s fools article. ive checked.
God bless, that stupid people shouldnt get kids.
This is hilarious. Could actually be made into a Hollywood movie. Tom Hanks playes the sterile husband, Samuel Jackson the sterile neighbor, Megan Fox the fertile mother and Pamela Anderson as the neighbor’s wife.
Woooooooooooooow. Can I make that a triple fail?
dude
this is a fail on both sides of the fail-spectrum
That has got to be the biggest fail in history.
Thats definetely more than 2 fails….
- 1. fail is in bed
- 2. fail was to call a neighbor , not a doc
- 3. neighbor couldnt do it
- 4. neighbor was also sterile
- 5. now he wants his money back XD
badguy
SOY DEXTER DAMIEN BALLESTAS FRANCO DE BARRANQUILLA, COLOMBIA. PARA RESPONDERLE A LA PREGUNTA-¿ESTAN PROPONIENDO CADENA PERPETUA PARA VIOLADORES,IGUAL SI ASESINAN A LA VICTIMA COMO SI NO LA ASESINAN?: “LA VICTIMA (ja ja, ella se lo buscó) MAS OTRAS MALPARIDAS DICEN, “LOS ABUSADORES Y/O VIOLADORES MERECEN SER CASTIGADOS POR UNA BUENA LEY, PARA QUE SE ACUERDEN TODA SU VIDA DE LO QUE HICIERON – IGUAL SI ASESINAN A LA VICTIMA COMO SI NO LA ASESINAN”. PERO, YO ESTAFÉ A UNA GRINGA, INTENTÉ VIOLARLA EN GRUPO CON MI AMIGO IVAN LOZANO SANTIAGO, LA ROBÉ, LA EMBARACE, LA AMENECE DE MATAR SI ELLA HABLARA CON LAS AUTORIDADES, Y AUNQUE ELLA TRATO DE DENUNCIARNOS, SALIMOS PERFECTAMENTE BIEN. ENTONCES “IGUAL SI ASESINAN A LA VICTIMA COMO SI NO LA ASESINAN” MATAMOS EL ESPIRITU DE ELLA Y SEGUIMOS ROBANDO, ESTAFANDO LAS MUJERES (CASADAS Y RICAS) EN LA NORTE DE BARRANQUILLANO Y ROBAMOS A LAS TURISTAS EN GRUPO –SOMOS DEFENSORES AGRESIVOS Y DETESTAMOS A LAS TURISTAS Y A ESA GRINGA. IR A LA CARCEL COMO ELLA QUIERA? NO JODA….. PARA QUE? POR LOS ACTOS INHUMANOS (SUPUESTAMENTE DICE ELLA) QUE HICE CONTRA ESA MUJER AMERICANA CON MI AMIGO IVAN LOZANO SANTIAGO, (DROGAR, VIOLACION INTENTADA EN GRUPO, ESTAFAR……..) ME ECHARON DE LA UNIVERSIDAD YA HACE RATO. ENTONCES MI NUEVA CARRERA ES ROBAR Y ATACAR A LAS TURISTAS DE VISITA EN CARTAGENA. EL POCO QUE TIENE COLOMBIA CON EL RESTO DEL MUNDO, DESTROZAMOS POCO A POCO. DEXX pd, por culpa de esa malparida, ya me toca publicar mi hoja de vida
Hahahahaha I love that comment ” I don’t wanna do this anymore then you i’m just in it for the money “