I’m not loose. Nor am I losing. But you are boring. You post the same crap over and over and over. And yet you wonder why people are so mean and disrespectful to you on here. They have clues for sale on Aisle 8.
I fell in a lake with my cellphone, but it managed to survive the ordeal!
Otherwise, I am sunburned and hating myself for being back at work…
Heheh how was your weekend?
Ooh! I think some cell phones are more resilient to water than others. Lucky you!
.
Sorry about the sunburn! Take some vitamin E. That’ll help you heal up quicker.
.
My weekend was busy. Lots of errands, planted 2 red raspberry bushes, a cookout I almost forgot about.
I can relate. We joined a pool this year so maybe I’ll actually get out in the sun. I never even put on a bathing suit last summer! That was bad. Some sun is really good for you (the best source of vitamin D).
LOL! I usually have the driver’s tan (left arm only). We had a nice federal refund this year, so it’s the best year to join. This year was $450 to join, but next year’s renewal will only be $150. For the whole summer! If I can make it once a month, I’ll be happy. I’d love to go every weekend!
.
I think we’ll have a great spring this year! It’s supposed to be in the 80′s this weekend!
I sure hope it is in the 80s this weekend!
I kinda want to go outside more…this winter was cold!!!
I’m sure you’ll get your money’s worth from the pool
*Laugh* My product (ignore firsters glasses) has worked so well in this thread, I am glad I have some very happy customers. Can I get some testimonials? Here in Toronto it will be 20 degrees C on friday.
Remember, people – it’s now “Totally Ignore Sam on FAILblog Time” – join the In Crowd and forget that he/she exists.
Ignoring Sam is both good for the complexion AND it improves your gas mileage!
Do it now – Don’t Wait!!
*squeeze*
.
Clicky for a youtube video. It’s from a sketch comedy team called The State. My personal fave is “The Jew, the Italian, and the Red Head Gay” but it’s offensive to most people so I’m not linking it.
I’ll get an avatar when you get a life. Of course, this would require you to stop trolling and fisrting. Let me know when you’ve accomplished this and I’ll be more than happy to comply with your request.
No velvet, I have to give this young girl Sam a little more credit. I laughed about several comments, especially when she discovered that I occasionally use a language I just made up.
Hiw can you say things like that. Whenever I think of Velvet, I think of a centient being at the center of the earth that knows all and guards a small button that stops the Earth from spinning if you push it……only me?
This is what you said above:
–
Just click, is it that hard ? Maybe you haven’t noticed it’s blue..
blue = link, I teach you.
–
…and I am wondering why you would say blue = link if you don’t even have a link.
As nice to new guys as a certain jackson is to children.
Nah just kidding.
I’ve been here for 10 minutes and I already blend in.
Let your inner random escape.
I propose a new policy. No one, I repeat No one under any circumstances, reply to anything Sam says. Reply around it or something, just act like it's not there. If this bill is passed, anyone caught replying to Sam will be severely punished.
And in the US, what you call biscuits we call cookies. Biscuits here are not sweet. It’s all so confusing…
BTW, what do you in England call what we call biscuits?
Makes sense, a biscuit here is like a simpler version of a scone.
Do you have the chain KFC (Kentucky Fried Chicken) in England, they would have to call it something, unless they serve scones instead (?)
SAM IGNORE LIST – Petition In Support of Ninja’s New Policy
-
LEILA Against Marketing BaconLube™ and FOR the Humane Treatment of Poor Little Pigs
Gothixemo
Blog Ninja (Blogmonster)
Arthur Eld
Society at large
Sometimes playing with trolls can be fun though. I marvel at their inability to use wit. *On a sidenote, 20 bucks says oblivios is Closet/Kelley….any takers?
I dunno who Kelley is so I’ma keep my money.
I do enjoy messing with trolls.
“I’m a mod of my own site”
‘Well I’m a strait A student with a good pay job and a GF. What are you? A mod on your own site.’
It appears young Sam cares only for peoples to get avatars rather than the fails on this site.
Would I be allowed to screen his posts and submit them here as fail material? :>
Sam is an Idiot-th who thinks everyone should have an avatar, uses gr4ammar incorrectly, worries about the length of names, and 'claims' to have a wife, ius 28, a ph.d, and can do BAD BAD things to my pc. says:
Ok i’m joining the Ignore Miss Sam crusade. I don’t want to be associated with this kind of stupidity. Other kinds of stupidity … Maybe , but she really takes the biscuit when it comes to stupidity. Bye Bye Sam. Jesus loves you, but we think your a ****
1th isn’t a mistake? what’s your PhD going to be in, Bullshit?
(just in case you weren’t aware, that’s a rhetorical question, you don’t need to answer because we all already know the answer. in case you were wondering, it’s yes.)
Please, oh please hack my computer now, I’m bored at my government job and want a real reason to go home. The way I figure it it’ll be a 2 for 1 special. Sam gets pwnt by uncle Sam and I get a new computer. oh wait… you’d actually have to have a flipping clue… damn.
now see here, you dont know these people, just because they can enjoy themselves without getting envoloped in their inferiority complex doesn’t mean you are smarter than them.
lol, they were right, when someone can out talk you, you go straight for their avatar, fyi im at school right now, and their firewalls prevent that kind of thing. thnx for your time.
on the contrary, i choose not to use my arsenol of proxys to pass the firewall up, because i dont need such little things as avatars to make me feel smart.
i can tell that you want to be better than me, thats fine, but i wont fall into your trap of trying to get me to brag obout what i can do, just to call me stupid. i dont deny i have many stupid moments. but i dont put people down, in case you havent noticed i havent put you down directly, you assume i have, and you know what assuming does. right?
No, that’s not it. I really cannot find a single joke you have ever posted. You have made comments about people, attacks is more accurate. Give me a time and date and a fail that you posted a joke to prove me wrong.
Laugh all you want….I’m driving it and you’re not.
Oh, and I can back up my so called “stories”
Show me a copy of your PhD and I’ll send you a pic of my car. It’s parked right outside of my office…the one where I work as an IT Manager, for which I actually have a degree. Oh yeah, a wife and kids too!
She’s like ants, graymatter. Keep dropping crumbs, and they keep coming around. I don’t think you made her look inferior; that probably happened some time ago; you can tell by her posts. She’s a pest to be ignored.
Who talks like that??? Only 12/13 yr old kids. I bet that he isn’t older than that.
Really… Get a life! Or go and brag to your mummy about great you are by being a smartass to the big boys.
Also, you should see a psychiatrist. That kind of behaviour is NOT normal. People that feel that their life fails big, often display this kind of interaction.
When they realize it comes to nothing, the worst may happen.
I apologize for making you look inferior to everyone here.
I also regret having to work today and inadvertently browsing here, for having to deal with you.
I will now ignore you and let you go back to your ignorant rants and raves.
@ 5:00 today, I will put the top down, drive away, and laugh at the poor 13 year old stuck at mom’s house playing video games, and having fun calling everyone a liar and putting everyone down.
Of course, if that’s what gets you hard, then go for it.
When he runs out of comebacks he orders us to get an avatar, yet his avatar is
of an underage girl he wishes he could rape but is unable to because he doesn’t
understand the difference between anime and reality.
:>
I happen to have a doctorate on the History and Origin of the English Language and its recent developments in the twenty first century, so take your scientific PhD and tell it to someone who cares.
You’ve given rise to a serious logical fallacy there, quite rare for someone with a doctorate in science. You have decided that my ignorance in one specific area must therefore mean that my ignorance extends over a wide range of areas of knowledge. This is like saying, that person with black hair owns an iPod, therefore all people with black hair must own an iPod.
What is your obsession with avatars, what purpose do they serve, how will having one improve my enjoyment of the internet in general, or FailBlog in particular? I can’t understand your reasoning behind this. It seems to be based on some kind of weird prejudice on your part, quit an unreasonable stance for a scientifically minded person to take.
Well, I must say, this is my “1th” comment here on Failblog, and I’m making it mainly to say that I will also be joining the “Ignore Sam” crusade. The first few Fails, it was amusing, but now, it’s just grown tired.
I can see your point, but with a first post, one would assume I will be making more posts, and it will be in these posts that I wll ignore Sam. (ps, I’m male)
I’m really not sure if I’ve done this right, but after months of reading, I feel like I should figure out this responding business. It’s awfully clever, and I keep wanting to respond, so I’m giving it a shot.
Oh dear; so I have to re-enter my information every time?
Balls.
I made an account, but that was apparently meaningless.
I thought no one was on here anymore because all my time stamps show up as West Coast time and it took me a while to figure out.
This is complex.
How uncanny! They should get married.
Too boring.
I’m not loose. Nor am I losing. But you are boring. You post the same crap over and over and over. And yet you wonder why people are so mean and disrespectful to you on here. They have clues for sale on Aisle 8.
Morning velvet! *squeeze*
Sam…you disappoint.
Hey mailicite!
.
*squeeze*
.
How was your weekend?
I fell in a lake with my cellphone, but it managed to survive the ordeal!
Otherwise, I am sunburned and hating myself for being back at work…
Heheh how was your weekend?
Ooh! I think some cell phones are more resilient to water than others. Lucky you!
.
Sorry about the sunburn! Take some vitamin E. That’ll help you heal up quicker.
.
My weekend was busy. Lots of errands, planted 2 red raspberry bushes, a cookout I almost forgot about.
Sounds like you had a good weekend Velvet!
I love my sunburn…reminds my skin that there is an actual sun…
*needs to get outside more now that the spring has started*
I can relate. We joined a pool this year so maybe I’ll actually get out in the sun. I never even put on a bathing suit last summer! That was bad. Some sun is really good for you (the best source of vitamin D).
OMG – Spring has finally come to North Iderho!!! Upper 70s yesterday, and at least high 60s the last 3 days
I need to get my stereotypical farmer’s tan…jealous of the pool, by the way!
I really hope this spring is nice!
LOL! I usually have the driver’s tan (left arm only). We had a nice federal refund this year, so it’s the best year to join. This year was $450 to join, but next year’s renewal will only be $150. For the whole summer! If I can make it once a month, I’ll be happy. I’d love to go every weekend!
.
I think we’ll have a great spring this year! It’s supposed to be in the 80′s this weekend!
lol i need to figure out how to tan XD, ive tried, but just keep getting paler! If I keep tanning, ill turn emo
I sure hope it is in the 80s this weekend!
I kinda want to go outside more…this winter was cold!!!
I’m sure you’ll get your money’s worth from the pool
In my world, it’s always the 80s
Don’t say a prayer for me now,
Save it till the morning after
You’re skill!
*bows deeply to the Moomin*
Duran to watch those potato shooters bending over like that Malcite.
I’m Irish, potatoes only make me stronger.
*Laugh* My product (ignore firsters glasses) has worked so well in this thread, I am glad I have some very happy customers. Can I get some testimonials? Here in Toronto it will be 20 degrees C on friday.
*squeeze*
The glasses are working wonderfully today!
We’re finally getting 70′s here. It’s been a long and cold winter. We had snow last week!
Glad the, were successful.
*squeeze*
It was very windy and gloomy yesterday, rain and wind always in my face no matter which way I turned.
Malicite!!! *squeezes*
McFail! *squeezes and nibbles*
*giggles*
How are you McFail?
So you’re a mod now, huh? What’s the world coming to?
Oh nooo! Sam is teh haxxor! He will use my IP to hang my computer! Oh, please, save me from his nonexistent threat!
Sam, you are pathetic. Shut-up and find something else constructive to do.
Remember, people – it’s now “Totally Ignore Sam on FAILblog Time” – join the In Crowd and forget that he/she exists.
Ignoring Sam is both good for the complexion AND it improves your gas mileage!
Do it now – Don’t Wait!!
Can we start another one of those petitions…?
Shamwow! You following me, camera guy?
WN your comment made me roffel ^-^
Only disturbing you.
Oooh, I’m an Engineer!
What sort do you babysit?
Mechanical and a few electrical, in the composites industry.
You sure seem to have more people skills than all mine put together!
Thankyou.
*blushes*
That’s because I’m a civil engineer. . . .
*jazz hands*
Ta-daaaa.
(It’s true, I’m a civil engineer)
Are you a Queen Bee?
I most surely am! If I had known it would grow into glorified babysitter, I would have reconsidered though…
can i have a squeeze Velvet =(
Wow, replying to self some more fail?
hello !
How uncanny! They should get married.
When John Met Sally / Definitely, Maybe
I would like you if you’d just be a little creative. But, if you don’t have the brains for it, I guess I can understand your inability to do so.
Which proves my second sentence.
.
Moving on…
Moving on from that dullard.
What’s with the name? Am intrigued.
*squeeze*
*squeeze*
.
Clicky for a youtube video. It’s from a sketch comedy team called The State. My personal fave is “The Jew, the Italian, and the Red Head Gay” but it’s offensive to most people so I’m not linking it.
No sound at the office
Can just see two blokes waving arms about in front of pudding.
@ Sam: stop talking.
WHO CARES ABOUT THE GODDAMN F*CKING AVATARS?!?! IT DOESN'T MATTER!!Sam
STFU!!go way stoopid *SMUSHES*SamGood smush BOGGY!!
Why the obsession with avatars? I quite like my generic one and I’ve grown quite attached to it.
I’ll get an avatar when you get a life. Of course, this would require you to stop trolling and fisrting. Let me know when you’ve accomplished this and I’ll be more than happy to comply with your request.
@ both of you: Can you not type at. It requires the same number of keys
You really need sound to understand. Perhaps you can ‘borrow’ someone’s speakers at lunch?
I guess that statement makes you feel important?
.
(final post to Sam from velvet)
.
sam is on my ignore list
I had fun playing with him on the last fail, but now he’s boring. He’s on my ignore list too.
Exactly, Arthur. It goes from fun to boring after about 4 posts.
No velvet, I have to give this young girl Sam a little more credit. I laughed about several comments, especially when she discovered that I occasionally use a language I just made up.
She does have a pretty little girl for an icon, Arthur. Needs lipstick, though.
keep telling yourself that champ
But your avatar is very feminine. You may want to fix that I initialy thought you were a girl as well.
*SQUEEZE*, by the way, velvet
Thanks, WN!
I’m checking this blog now a little while,
but your avatar is definitely gay.
Hiw can you say things like that. Whenever I think of Velvet, I think of a centient being at the center of the earth that knows all and guards a small button that stops the Earth from spinning if you push it……only me?
*squeeze*
.
You spin me right round, baby, right round…
I was not being ironic. You fail Sam. You just fail.
Velvet, …………push the button.
I was not being sarcastic.
It does not know sarcasm?!
I shall have to see what I can do.
Shall also look up the offensive one, not easily offended
Thankyou
I couldn’t find the offensive one. If you find it can you link it for me?
*squeeze* How’s your day going my favorite Moomin?
*SQUEEZES The Moomin and Magnificent Mr. Cuddles*
It’s been too long since I squeezed you two.
*squeeze* How are you doing today AA? It has been a while since I’ve squeezed you!
sam sam sam sam
wonderful sam
marvelous sam
tastes like ham
sam sam sam
I think we’re getting marvelously close to “Totally Ignore Sam in FAILblog Time”.
Do I have any takers?
HERE!!
.
*squeeze*
.
Never argue with an idiot; onlookers may not be able to determine which one is the idiot.
That is the best quote!
May I steal it?
Disagree. Lady Sam, our young maiden, makes it easy to see who the idiot is.
Feel free, Ms B! It’s available for the taking. That’s how I acquired it, anyways.
Velvet : that is the best word of advice I have ever read here! (no sarcasm)
eArtrash, I usually follow it each day here. But, I’m caffeine deprived today because the coffee machine is BROKEN and I’m a bit off kilter.
Wunt BOGGY fixes Cooffee Machine?
*BANGING, SCREAMS & LOUD NOISES COME FROM COFFEE MACHINE ROOM*
COOFFE MACHINES WERKS NOW!IT SCARED NOT TO WORKS NOW!
Velvet cans hab a cooffe now! RIGHT MACHINES?*machine whimpers & spits out coffee*
*checks up kilter* Very tidy. Perhaps a double shot will help! *passes cup ‘o joe*
Thanks, boggy! I knew you’d come to my rescue!
.
DrB! You’re such a mess! *pinch*
*passes Bukkit of Cooffe sludge to Stoopid Sam*
DRINKS! NOW!NOW!I maked it with waters fum this Bukkit!*points at MOP Bukkit*
*raises hand emphatically*
Pick me!
Consider yourself taken, Ms B – and my compliments on your chosen vocation
Anyone else for the incredibly exciting “We Don’t See Sam” Club?
I don’t see what you did there.
That’s cos you poked out your eye!
I was dazzled by your dangliness and lost control.
*raises hand whilst doing gynaecological exam*
Ehm…It’s okay m’am, it’s for failblog.
Put that back in there!!
Well, yes…I’ve been wondering why it hasn’t been done all along. So, Count me in.
Same here…it has been getting pretty bad around here these past few days.
Count me in.
Sounds good to me, although I usually lurk anyway. Trolling hasn’t been this effective on Failblog since service fail and it’s rather disappointing.
*TastesSam*Sam
YUCKKY! BLEH!BOGGY I AM NO LIKESamHey, maybe Sam does know something about computers after all.You don't say...I had no idea. That is what I was referring to, dipshit. But it sure isn't reflected in your posts.*ponders Sam’s black name*
LMAO
ADD?
ROFL same idea here,i thought i was colour blinded
Blog Ninja (Blogmonster) NO
USE CODEBlog Ninja (Blogmonster) ??BOGGY USE CODE
JUST BOGGY
UNNERSTANDS?
OK Bitty Little
*pats BOGGY onna (strangely mis-shapen) head.*
Now now, BOGGY – it’s OK now…
*hands BOGGY a Sam Cookie*
But, but...they said I could.So, are you Sam as in Samantha? Or Sam as in Samuel?
Your name isn’t in blue.
This is what you said above:
–
Just click, is it that hard ? Maybe you haven’t noticed it’s blue..
blue = link, I teach you.
–
…and I am wondering why you would say blue = link if you don’t even have a link.
Wow! *shakes head*
-
Have a nice day Sam. Go hit refresh you may miss the next new fail post.
Smarter than whom?
Sam means he is smarter than the snail in his garden Nellie. That is an insult to the snail.
I would certainly be concerned, were I the snail.
But I’m not even an occasional snail.
Except during certain activities.
(wink wink)
*slides past leaving a snail trail*
*waves*
You need to see someone about those legs Granny!
Zing, but why bother. Please don’t waste your intellect on the empty minded.
*squeeze*
And spot! Don’t forget spot!
Rita, Sue and Bob too.
… But everyone knew her as Nancy. ♪
…& Carol, Ted, and Alice.
The movie star, and the rest.
Okay then…Ginger or Maryanne?
Mmmmm, Ginger, definitely.
…Willma or Betty?
Wilma. I’ve always had a thing for redheads. Don’t know why.
I’d do Wilma, but I’d be thinking of Betty
so…Daphne or Thelma?
Scrappy Doo, just to shut him the hell up.
LOL
Thelma or Louise?
Thelma or Louise?
Daphne. That was too easy. How ’bout:
Patty, Maxine, or Laverne?
Cathy Lane or Patty Lane?
Do I have to pick a Lane, or can I swerve back and forth?
You can swerve on Penny Lane, but you shouldn’t drink while doing it unless you want to catching pregnancy.
risk ^
I did swerve on Penny Lane one time – almost hit a nurse selling poppies. The little children were laughing at me behind my back!
Betty. She’s got nicer hair. & her laugh, while a little annoying, is cute at the same time.
Paul, John, George, or Ringo?
self evident
*facepalm*
Spot is the dog, you idiot. Perhaps you should go by Einstein…
300 meme is creaping up on you now.
300 dogs.
And a spartan.
There’s no reason we can’t be civilized.
Finally, a quote from that movie that isn’t “This is SPARTAAA” or “Tonight we dine in hell!”
Hells kitchen?
Give them nothing! But take from them everything!
Then we will fight in the shade.
The often forgotten, “AWOOO, AWOOO, AWOOO!”
None sire!
*obliges*
Madness? This is FAAAAAILBLOOOOG!!!!(dot org)
*slinks off in shame*
Then who’ve I been talking to for 17 years?
That explains my whole life…
Cheer up. Buttscratcher?
I poured spot remover on him so he wasnt around to give his testimony.
Hahahaha.
Evil. Clever, but evil.
I got hare remover too…
Ohhh, hairy should so be here for his comment.
Crap spilled it in Johns lap!
Not that there was anything there to remove…
Hahahahaha! So that’s stew for dinner, I guess!
There appears to be hair in my stew…
That was a Thumper of a reply!
(Hehehe Welcome!)
Thanks.
Watch out for the thwomp of a reply thats coming this spring.
No, this is first!
Matt
January 14th, 2008 at 2:23 pm
This is taped the door to my dorm room. It makes me choke with laughter after a long day of crunching equations.
^First^
Did a little research? Good work.
Yeah but like nobody noticed. Oh well, maybe I can use it again in the future. All copycats will be severely punished.
2end voter, I’m awesome!!!!
Your spelling should be the next fail. 2end = Second? What are you retarded? It would sound like two-end. What’s a two-end? It’s second or 2nd.
It's almost as bad as saying 1th.I am the 4rd person to reply to this.
Good one.
Impressive.
You just can’t take the fact you weren’t second, puh
No, I’d say it is exactly the same as saying 1th.
Ordinals are bad. Especially misspelled ordinals.
This fail… Fails.
Redundancy fail.
Redundancy win?
Okay, I will give you that. *feeling generous today*
But repetition win!
Seeing as how every fail apparently needs a corresponding win.
Rofl big failure
Maybe she had a sex change?
Think of all the posibale explanations!
Oh damn now i see
Reply button, big guy, use the reply button.Sorry, it was at the bottom of the screen when I replied to it.You replied to your reply?
Thats like wearing your armor in a pocket of your armor!
*coughRE5cough*
*raises eyebrow*
Sorry, I don't play that.Good. You’re safe for now…
Can’t sleep, clown will eat me.
I AM the clown.
Oh god. *hides under pillow*
Aw crap hes under a pillow.
*leaves*
Is that why the armor takes up an inventory slot while you’re wearing it?
“Posibale” explanation to why “there are school”.
FailBlog is in desperate need of a peace maker. A Dalai Lama of sorts. I am currently accepting applications. Sam and the likes need not apply.
I suppose a ninja is not what you're looking for.there’s always room for ninjas.
Indeed.
In fact, for trolls they are actually preferred. Those katanas are SHARP!!
Sorry for being random, But this had to be said. WEEZER!!!!!!!!!
Actually we gave up years ago. We couldn’t find the ninja.
You don't find a ninja. A ninja finds you.The Soviets had ninjas?
No, chuck norris is a ninja
Chuck Norris got beated/en by Bruce Lee. But.. he died. Conspiracy?
NO bruce got round house kicked.
And then sent half way around the world to Japan.
Where he got falcon punched.
*applies*
1800 dial-a-llama
I heard Llamas spit.
Only when you start making out with them.
*nods* They’d be more popular if they swallowed!
Only Sam swallows.
Sam gargles
..then swallows.
Don’t look at me, I killed a man for using the wrong “your” once.
*puts away his collection of yours*
Every one of my yours is individually tagged! Some have radio collars.
*is careful with yours*
*wraps his yours in aluminum foil*
*makes a little space in the coals of the campfire*
*follows DrB’s lead and puts his aluminum cased yours on the fire*
How do you like your yours?
BOGGY LIKEDS THE DAYS OF YORE!
ha ha ha HAR HAR HAR HAR!If you’re happy if my yours is like your yours, then I’m happy! *passes marshmallows…dozes off for the day…* zzZZZzzzZZzz
But Satin now is wiser than of yore, And tempts by mickey switch, not making your.
Your kidding!
*gets hit by sweet and falls over dead*
Sweet victory
I wasn’t expecting to be hit on the head by a Haribo chewy.
I reckon Lord Rogue the Third has spies.
Pleased to meet you Gothixemo!
Pleased to sweet you too, Magnificent.
I mean Meat.
I meant Meet.
I mean… wait yes, meet.
Now I’m hungry
.
I shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die.
Why else would you shoot a man?
BaconLube violations?
BaconLube as a whole IS the violation.
Somethings that are wrong…are actually so so right.
BaconLube is my only reason for living
*Hangs his head and cries*
As long as the pay is good…
*applies*
The pay IS good because it’s the satisfaction you get from keeping peace.
Careful. You know that here in Orwell’s America a Peacemaker is a missile.
Or a revolver.
Or a brother.
Or a pipe.
Or a “of eight”.
Sally must be John’s weekend moniker. It’s amazing what a wig and max factor can do..
Every time you post, I get a different earworm. Now it’s Beverly Hills.
That’s where I want to be, living in Beverly Hills.
*weezes*
Sorry, I have a cough.
But it’s so easy to replace the earworm with “I Love Rock and Roll”
Dammit, now that’s stuck in MY head!
Wait a second, how do you beta test a real product? I thought beta testing was a computer term for testing a game, or some other product.
That guy looks like Joseph Fritzl, the girl is his daughter and the test was a paternity test.
Now that you mention it…
It was a double negative.
he was bust for illegally installing a cellar in his house without proper permission from the council tsk tsk
You can get arrested for that?
Aw crap… *hides the cellar door*
Frust, fist!
GCF is my hero
sorry I was neked (get an avatar blah blah)
And mine!
ARG!
Sam, you’re the sharpest knife when i comes to English. It’s not called “1th”, it’s called 1st. And loose and lose have very different meanings.
That is about the most retarded “proof” that your grammar is correct that I can think of.
Basically, according to your proof, I can say anything I want with -th on the end to form nouns and adjectives?
Idiotth…
Heee, nice
@Sam – You are amazing and so much smarter than all of us put together.
I’m glad you cannot determine sarcasm correctly – otherwise you would of taken the above statement literally!
you’re || with this world…
or senth.
Why am i first sentence okay
i dont think that u realize that u didnt type “1st”. who in the world would say “1th” ????
Your first sentence is not OK.
Nothing you say makes sense.
wow…love the FAIL,and the were spot on.
Careful, I once killed two people for saying that.
I knew I liked you!
WARNING: Tasteless humour below!
Those photos are of the Fritzl’s! I wonder what the testimonials were for? Any ideas?
Damn! I was beaten to it!
Why have a warning? We just read it anyway.
*carefully joins fb* any one here nice to new guys?
As nice to new guys as a certain jackson is to children.
Nah just kidding.
I’ve been here for 10 minutes and I already blend in.
Let your inner random escape.
hooray, i dont have a PhD!!!!!oh wait… was that off topic?
I dont even know what a PhD is!
Tis what I get for being a WoW head I guess
is wow really that fun?
Welcome to both Gothixemo & oblivious!
Ya might wanna go to gravatar.com and rustle up an avatar
Goth – I likes yer style!
i will later thnx 4 the warm welcome!
You catch on quick! Kudos!
i try!
not bad for a senior in high school right?
*spots Gothixemo sticking out like a sore thumb*
Duck and cover!
*ducks*
>w>
<w<
I think what you mean is put in the duck and cover it for a good hour or so until its nice and tender.
I did that.
As long as you don’t post FIRST, photoshopped, fake, or any other troll-style activities.
.
Welcome!
np
*waves*
Hello there.
hello moomin, ive been reading yalls comments for months, they get funnier everyday!
We’ve a great group of regulars here, very funny. Glad you’re enjoying reading the comments and ventured in to say hello. Come join the fun.
*squeeze*
*squeezes right back* yay its my turn to be squeezed, i am complete!:D
Nah, sam hasn’t picked on you yet. When she does, then you’ll be complete.
i wil wait till the end of eternity if i have to… can i pick the fight????
Stay oblivious to Sam. It’s for the best.
*shakes hand*
Howdy!
howdy, you made a funny!
I’m funny like that but not often.
WOOHOO!!!
I am complete then.
I propose a new policy. No one, I repeat No one under any circumstances, reply to anything Sam says. Reply around it or something, just act like it's not there. If this bill is passed, anyone caught replying to Sam will be severely punished.Agreed. But replying to Simon is ok. He said so.
Get a lifeth
winth!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What’s the punishment? Gonna put us on your lap and spank us?
You’ll be baconlubed.
Now you know the secret of the lube, you really don’t want that.
You geekology reader, you!
I….*speechless*
I can read your minds.
>D
Either that or I’m a geekology reader too… crap.
My hat has an inner lining of tinfoil!
So….
It is you who is the reader of geekology!
Muahahahahaha.
*barfs* Can I just choose to be spanked instead?
*raises eyebrow*
Don’t you want to do something wrong first or do you just like to be punished?
*blushes*
Oh … well … hehe. BYE! *flees*
If only GCF were here to sweep me up on his pig so we could give chase.
*sigh*
*no pig has a turtle,, offers to moomin*
Thankyou kindly.
*balances bottle of baconlube on turtles back*
*points turtle in direction of LEILA and let’s it go*
Now all we do is wait.
could take a while, got some bubbly?
Champagne or bubblegum?
Don’t know why I ask, I have neither.
I have a cup of tea. Want one?
*accepts and sips* owww hot!
Oops. Um, mind that. It’s hot.
Here, have a chocolate hobnob to take your mind of it.
if i may ask, wtf is a hobnob?
Awwwwwwwwww.
Chocolate hobnobs are the best of biscuits.
(clicky)
i more than happily accept. num num, mmmmmm! good
And in the US, what you call biscuits we call cookies. Biscuits here are not sweet. It’s all so confusing…
BTW, what do you in England call what we call biscuits?
idk i live in texas?
It was @ Moomin, but we’re at the last nesting level, so I couldn’t reply directly.
MRN, I don’t think we have a name for them, I could be wrong though.
It’s kind of like a cakey/scone thing.
*shrugs*
Makes sense, a biscuit here is like a simpler version of a scone.
Do you have the chain KFC (Kentucky Fried Chicken) in England, they would have to call it something, unless they serve scones instead (?)
We do but they don’t sell those here. They tend to sell us flat Coke and ice cream.
No. He’ll show us pictures of Sam in the nude. A fate worse than death, I must say.
no sam will be naked and baconlubed
GAH MENTAL IMAGE!
IT BURNS!
yes!!! BURNNNN!!!!MWUHAHAHA
Agreed. Probably should have been done long ago.
I’m trying, but he’s just making it so damn hard.
hahahaha big fail… on amazon, look the time
wow…love the test,fun and the were spot on
Noes!
We lost Joe!
SAM IGNORE LIST – Petition In Support of Ninja’s New Policy
-
LEILA Against Marketing BaconLube™ and FOR the Humane Treatment of Poor Little Pigs
Gothixemo
Blog Ninja (Blogmonster)
Arthur Eld
Society at large
I have been since I arrived.
Sometimes playing with trolls can be fun though. I marvel at their inability to use wit. *On a sidenote, 20 bucks says oblivios is Closet/Kelley….any takers?
I dunno who Kelley is so I’ma keep my money.
I do enjoy messing with trolls.
“I’m a mod of my own site”
‘Well I’m a strait A student with a good pay job and a GF. What are you? A mod on your own site.’
I want a troll pet.
As much as I enjoy his constant idiocy, I have to agree that the only way to beat a troll is to pretend they don’t exist.
Yep. Even refraining from referring to him anymore could only help. & that’s my last reference to him.
Read the reply below.
I have no idea what troll you speak of.
What troll? I havent seen one here.
I don’t know. I must’ve been seeing things. There’s no such thing as a troll.
Same here. Probably just a spot on my monitor. It’s gone now.
It appears young Sam cares only for peoples to get avatars rather than the fails on this site.
Would I be allowed to screen his posts and submit them here as fail material? :>
Nose, don’t feed the beast.
I’m picking mine.
Sam isn’t in a zoo just yet. Feeding is allowed.
Oh wait… now its not allowed.
I think Ninja wants to fail blog to do without him. So, no.
Fair play.
Arm yourselves with boots to kick the intruder!
*buys boots online*
Add me to this list, I lurk most of the time but he annoys me
SHHHHH!!! Do you guys hear that? I think Sam has left and is obsessively refreshing the page for the new post.
Keep ordering the slaves to build the great wall of fail though, we can never be too safe.
I’ll plug in the deflector shields and turn on the automated turrets.
Get a few head crabs too.
They luke baconlube, and we all know trolls roll around in it, if not then… well.. yeah.
Sam as a headcrab zombie… I bet he’d scream “1th! 1tttthhh! Gurff uun affatar!”
see he has a kind-of-nice, he apologized. its a new beginning!
*slaps oblivious twice*
-
What is wrong with you?
sorry the crack kicked in
Okay, let’s write it off to a moment of weakness. Never let it happen again.
dont worry the, you smacked me out of it, i owe u my life.
The only thing positive about him is HIV
Its all a lie.
ITS ALL A BIG LIE!
Ith don’t particularly thinkth it’s too longth.
Admires the above person’s attitude
Go polish your puny-hamster doodle.
Well, you DID boast about your PhD did you not?
7:01? you’re loosing your powers, Sam…
Don’t be so late or else you could end up not being firth!
Ok i’m joining the Ignore Miss Sam crusade. I don’t want to be associated with this kind of stupidity. Other kinds of stupidity … Maybe , but she really takes the biscuit when it comes to stupidity. Bye Bye Sam. Jesus loves you, but we think your a ****
We never said you were stupid. We are sick of the stupidity. There is a difference.
Now we DID say you were an idiotth though.
Neither does fistr or fitrs. And you have blogged both of those terms lately.
buggy failblog caused you to post 1th?
1th isn’t a mistake? what’s your PhD going to be in, Bullshit?
(just in case you weren’t aware, that’s a rhetorical question, you don’t need to answer because we all already know the answer. in case you were wondering, it’s yes.)
Please, oh please hack my computer now, I’m bored at my government job and want a real reason to go home. The way I figure it it’ll be a 2 for 1 special. Sam gets pwnt by uncle Sam and I get a new computer. oh wait… you’d actually have to have a flipping clue… damn.
stop acting like a 12 year old girl.
What the flark, my reply disappeared!
*facepalm*
Ok. you ARE stupid.
There, there *gives encouraging pat on back* I saw your comment and giggled.
all you have to do is stop flashing around your supposed PhD and just enjoy funny comments on funny pics, is that hard?
I bet you $20 his degree is from DeVry.
now see here, you dont know these people, just because they can enjoy themselves without getting envoloped in their inferiority complex doesn’t mean you are smarter than them.
lol, they were right, when someone can out talk you, you go straight for their avatar, fyi im at school right now, and their firewalls prevent that kind of thing. thnx for your time.
on the contrary, i choose not to use my arsenol of proxys to pass the firewall up, because i dont need such little things as avatars to make me feel smart.
thnx for your time, have a nice day!
last!
Im pretty sure you have never posted a funny comment.
No, that’s not it. I really cannot find a single joke you have ever posted. You have made comments about people, attacks is more accurate. Give me a time and date and a fail that you posted a joke to prove me wrong.
*nods* yup, he’s too busy trolling to actually prove himself. Providing he could, which is another point entirely.
*waits for the ‘get an avatar’*
See, you said you’d wait for it, so he won’t say it.
aw damn, my bad… I wasn’t thinking in 12 year old girl logic. *facepalm*
Stop being so mean. Hes only been here for a couple of hours.
“I post funny comments.”
Where? You certainly haven’t posted any here.
(By the way, my name links to certain generally-accepted characteristics of a sociopath. Ask an adult to get you some help.)
HERE HERE!
I shall jointh this crusadeth too.
Dittoth on what aArtrash-th saidth.
What kind of car is that in your avatar? Is that a Mazda Miata?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
…sorry…It’s an S2000…
must apologize….
*gets emotional over the thought of having his S referred to as a Mazda Miata*
All Better now…sorry
It would look even better with a HUGE spoiler, y’know.
HMMMMMMMM
Buy it and put one on…
I fuc*in own the car you d*psh*t. It’s a picture of MY car. I should know what it is you idiot.
It’s an S2000, of which all are convertibles, and have an optional hardtop. MORON.
BTW. the picture in my avatar IS with the TOP DOWN. Look harder D*mb*ss!
Laugh all you want….I’m driving it and you’re not.
Oh, and I can back up my so called “stories”
Show me a copy of your PhD and I’ll send you a pic of my car. It’s parked right outside of my office…the one where I work as an IT Manager, for which I actually have a degree. Oh yeah, a wife and kids too!
Idiot.
you obviously know nothing of photoshop. Or the process of taking set pictures even.
And you obviously DON’T own an S2000, kiddie.
Listing?
funny kiddo.
She’s like ants, graymatter. Keep dropping crumbs, and they keep coming around. I don’t think you made her look inferior; that probably happened some time ago; you can tell by her posts. She’s a pest to be ignored.
Don’t kill my fun Sparky.
I like watching trolls hang themselves.
…ok
I’ll stop feeding her.
Oh, your call, of course. But she feeds on reactions. But if it’s fun for you, that’s your business. (Sure don’t want to be known as a fun killer!
…but but, where did your name go?
Meh! It’s easier to remember this way.
This name? I made it go away a little while ago for some reason.
Do I call you Sparky or SAW?
I kinda like Sparky better; it’s less cutting!
Sparky will be fine, Jam.
Who talks like that??? Only 12/13 yr old kids. I bet that he isn’t older than that.
Really… Get a life! Or go and brag to your mummy about great you are by being a smartass to the big boys.
Also, you should see a psychiatrist. That kind of behaviour is NOT normal. People that feel that their life fails big, often display this kind of interaction.
When they realize it comes to nothing, the worst may happen.
Seriously, think on getting some help
I already said he is a sociopath and I mean it.
*nods*
He is. With every comment that gets more obvious. I agree with KazLand, he should get help. He’s a school shooter in the making.
I hope we can keep this next fail for ourselves, and not let it be dominated by trolls.
It was a trollish day, that’s for sure. Maybe an email to FB is necessary.
Not sure they would have a problem right now,
since this person is actually causing hundreds of replies, which is what FB wants to happen.
It’s definitely a self-policing fail.
I’m ignoring the ignoring crusade.
i’m a ninja too!
LAST!!!!!!!!
you pronounced it wrong.
it’s lastTH.
I apologize for making you look inferior to everyone here.
I also regret having to work today and inadvertently browsing here, for having to deal with you.
I will now ignore you and let you go back to your ignorant rants and raves.
@ 5:00 today, I will put the top down, drive away, and laugh at the poor 13 year old stuck at mom’s house playing video games, and having fun calling everyone a liar and putting everyone down.
Of course, if that’s what gets you hard, then go for it.
HES GONE EMO!
The good lord has answered our prayers!
f@ck u were lastTH a second ago but not anymore….
i’m the lastTH again!
LOL, thats too funny dude, some peopel are so freakin stupid!
RT
http://www.privacy.pro.tc
sam just cant win to day can he?:P
awww and here i thought you left, glad to see here you are still here.
that is a great example of irony.
This is fun.
how are you graymatterz, looks sunny today.
and best wishes to you to sam. from all of us here at fb, we wish you to get a life for your birthday!
good, and you?
awesome, nice car. is it really yours, love the s2000.
Yes, before the new hood, Muse front lip, wheels, and stripe job.
It’s for sale…wanna buy it?
i wish im broke, rent, i got a chevy cobalt, its a good car, and all i can afford.
Wife said I gotta git rid of 1 toy before getting another…and I’m in the mood for a bike again.
*thinking that the wife is always there to keep me in check*
(damnit)
sam… man… if he has the car, he has it. drop it.
You know, it’s funny. It’s not like I said own a Veyron, or a McLaren.
It’s a 38,000 dollar car. And it’s not a rare one either. Big deal.
i know, but still i am that broke…
No, I meant that someone doesn’t believe that a person can have one.
I won’t say any names, lest it grab attention.
When he runs out of comebacks he orders us to get an avatar, yet his avatar is
of an underage girl he wishes he could rape but is unable to because he doesn’t
understand the difference between anime and reality.
:>
ouch, that is painful i hope he can choke it… get it?
I presume everyone else is sitting back watching the fun…
*WAVES*
yes we are.
Nice car :O
Isn’t that an S2000?
It ’tis.
Thank you.
You got a leach attached to you.
*pointing to Sam*
He’s trying to leach you for he be jealous of you.
Nah, that’s a figment of our imagination.
Sorry, I meant fisterth
:O he haid frist!!!
Frsti… nah, that’s a stretch… or a streth.
lol
see now thats moderately funny. kudos to you
|||||||SAM IS:||||||
Great
Oblivious
Sexy
Oriented
Daring
Obvious
Mainstreem
Inteligent
Zoolander-kinda-guy
Enlightened
Young
Old
Ugly
Really Annoying
Stupid
Extremelly retarded
Loser
Fu**ing bastar*
-> Go and choose your favorite combination!
y do i have to be in there?
You don’t, no worries there.
wew, thnx u!
Sam shut up
Hey I’v been reading you guys comments for the past couple weeks and they are hilarious. Mind if I start reguarly commenting?
please do! one rule… bust on sam
Only if you post ordinal numbers indicating how quickly you can post on a new fail.
52th.
Everyone here (minus trolls) are pretty accepting and awesome.
Post as you see fit! Just…don’t become a troll.
LOL, you’d thin Sam would at least look at the date clearly displayed above ALL of her posts today! April 21ST!!!!
failblog fails….it’s 21th.
those who know much say little
those who know little say much.
…
^^^ hmmm…aside from other languages…..maybe…..nevermind
i cant remember who said that, does anyone know?
much obliged
if you were smart you would know that “much obliged” means thank you, so yes you are the smart one.
“much obliged” is another way of oblivious saying “thank you”.
Jean-Jacques Rousseau actually.
I happen to have a doctorate on the History and Origin of the English Language and its recent developments in the twenty first century, so take your scientific PhD and tell it to someone who cares.
high five
*high fives*
ROCK out with you Doc(torate) out.
*your
bukkit please
i take him seriously. and you dont try and argue with me. so dont be mean
Because my PhD is in LANGUAGES and not COMPUTERS or NETWORK APPLICATIONS so I don’t know how to get one, nor could I be bothered finding out.
You’ve given rise to a serious logical fallacy there, quite rare for someone with a doctorate in science. You have decided that my ignorance in one specific area must therefore mean that my ignorance extends over a wide range of areas of knowledge. This is like saying, that person with black hair owns an iPod, therefore all people with black hair must own an iPod.
dude just ignore sam, he is ignorant. he cannot carry on a decent conversation without putting someone down.
Thank you for the concern, but I rather enjoy educating the foolish, it fills one with such a sense of purpose.
true, but this guy is stubbornzilla, he doesnt know when to quit.
I can always stop when I get bored/my date arrives.
What is your obsession with avatars, what purpose do they serve, how will having one improve my enjoyment of the internet in general, or FailBlog in particular? I can’t understand your reasoning behind this. It seems to be based on some kind of weird prejudice on your part, quit an unreasonable stance for a scientifically minded person to take.
Ah, a childish attempt at an insult. “Gaynor” happens to be my second name and I’m not sure how my current avatar in any way represents homosexuality.
Yours shows how gay YOU are.
You have an avatar of an anime girl.
I bet you like to dress as mummy’s little girl, eh? :>
I think you have an avatar fetish.
Psssst… Sam, your stupid is showing.
AVIS! *Pounce*
LMFAO
Where’s Boggy and Ninja when you need them…?
Well, I must say, this is my “1th” comment here on Failblog, and I’m making it mainly to say that I will also be joining the “Ignore Sam” crusade. The first few Fails, it was amusing, but now, it’s just grown tired.
Another logical fallacy, considering noone has asked chamberino a direct question, s/he could not be said to be ignoring anyone yet.
I can see your point, but with a first post, one would assume I will be making more posts, and it will be in these posts that I wll ignore Sam. (ps, I’m male)
Hey sam what’s your PhD in?
annoyance… *lol*
SAM I AM I AM SAM THE 1TH
I’m back! Did I miss much?
Welcome back! It’s been amusing here today. I invite you to scroll up. Before you do, grab a strong drink. You will need it.
Thanks and…..wow….just wow!
You weren’t joking.
Maybe I should go away for another month?
Nah…please stay. Sam is OTR today. SHE is PMSing badly too.
Dang…and here I thought she was a guy PMSing badly.
My bad.
Of course I’ll stay. I’ve missed you guys
and the comments way too much!:D
But you’ll protect me…right?
*hopeful look.*
Just some kid claiming to have a PhD and car
I have a car!
Do I get to be horrifically obnoxious too?
no u need a PhD too and an avatar apparently
Damn!
then again this is my 1st (or is that 1th) day postin on failblog, i may be wrong
For the record: Sam pwned all of you. The best part? Y’all don’t even realize it. The hubris of this clique is astounding.
*Appeals to failblog to make Sam mod*
Some of us realize it. We’ll recover.
The what were spot on? The WHAT?
They seem both so identically happy about something! Possibly results, but who knows!?
I love tests and fun things too!
I’m really not sure if I’ve done this right, but after months of reading, I feel like I should figure out this responding business. It’s awfully clever, and I keep wanting to respond, so I’m giving it a shot.
It took me a few tries too, the UI here is quite counter-intuitive.
And welcome!
Hey, thanks!
Oh dear; so I have to re-enter my information every time?
Balls.
I made an account, but that was apparently meaningless.
I thought no one was on here anymore because all my time stamps show up as West Coast time and it took me a while to figure out.
This is complex.
Test 1, 2.
Three and four.
Five?
SAM I AM !! I AM SAM!
You’re an Idiot.
I am Sam
I am Sam
Sam I am
That Sam-I-am!
Than Sam-I-am!
I do not like
that Sam-I-am!
-A lurker who is really getting tired of Sam.
But Sam is the man!
But Man is the sam!
the must be bot.
The must be sought.
Where has Sam gone?
The bad thing is that the test accidentally 93MB of .rar files.
I’m impressed with the laziness of that company.
Wait.
So that’s NOT Josef Fritzl?
I don’t know if anyone’s mentioned this yet but ‘John’ looks remarkably like Josef Fritzl.
Before and After the “operation”?
Must have been some “operation”
Call me a cynic but I don’t think that those two actually said what was written.
However, I’m also dumb so maybe I’m wrong.
#35
It’s a generated testimonial, duh!