Submitted by David S
-
-
Copy & paste this:
Popular FAIL Videos
-
Recent Failures in Communications
Felis on FAIL Nation: Wicked Awesome Ca… Skip on School of Fail: We’re Go… silentevil77 on Ugliest Tattoos: All Beast, No… Andrew on School of Fail: Celebrate Blac… Jack F. on School of Fail: We’re Go… JB on FAIL Nation: Wicked Awesome Ca… kuhlmann on School of Fail: We’re Go… thisguy on Poorly Dressed: Everyone Wubs … El Forresto on Poorly Dressed: Everyone Wubs … hunter:) on Poorly Dressed: Everyone Wubs … 
Cheezburger Company Blog
Nawt second?
Nawt funny.
*passes Marcel a very expensive civit coffee!*
Nut funny.
That stuff ain’t bad.
The weasel coffee has a really nice rich flavour too.
Wookie is plentiful when you can get it.
what does he mean by 20 years gaurantee ?
what does he mean by “free?”?
+home made… Yeah right.
triple fail?
nawt quite the burn of the week
Nawt third?
Nawt last?
Nawt pregnancy-safe?
Unless you’re sterile.
*rubs cellphone on balls*
Oooo, phone bone.
First!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Too fast young man.
Fone Bone
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bone_(comics)
Call me Ishmael.
Ok.
Bush gave me a sex-ed book saying that by
touching my balls my girlfriend would get pregnant…
relieved, I bought Mr. J’s condoms and wrapped
them around my testes.
does brainbleach make you sterile? if so, then I’m sfae after many visits to this site
I like eggs!
If you are buying home-made condoms, I hope you like your eggs fertilized.
yes i do
Oh. *leaves thread*
I like marshmallows.
I like the Wizard of Oz.
Most of Dorothy’s friends do.
I like square butts and I cannot lie
Squid and Sea Star can’t deny
When a sponge walks in, four corners and his pen
Like he got phone book implants, the crowd shouts
All the ladies stare
Dang those pants are square!
Swimming through the seaweed tangle
Is a butt with sharp right angles
I just felt bad for you — that no one had replied to your…
poem.
Reciting a Burger King ad is not poetry.
dont mess with the king
The king has left the building.
yall just jealus he “down with the king”
And I’m back!
you gotta admit that commercial is damn funny
Spongebob Squarepants!
“…When a sponge walks in, four corners and his pen….”
And his pen? Really?
Try “in his pants.”
HILARIOUS!!!!
i like turtles
and youre a very nice zombie
I LEIK TOYTELS
I knew it! i knew it! i knew i would spot it eventually!
I like kittens
ME TOO!
IS FUNNY
I love Lauren
They must prevent you getting drunk?
Pull ‘em over the bottle with booze!
Use them as a teat?
Yes that is what you do with it!
Makes your famous beverage taste like rubber! You’ll stop drinking – pregnancy prevented.
I love the taste of rubber in the morning.
*look arounds for malcite*
*takes chomp of Mcfail*
That’s nicer though
*yawns*
what’s up guys?
We’re invading lolcats as they have a potato.
Trolls are invading the inflatable.
I keep saying teat.
That is all
How you doing?
One of those dodgy lolcats stole my avatar!
I’d be careful not to escalate this. Personally, I don’t care much if they trash a thread from 5 weeks ago.
Click for info on the school many of those little kids attend. Contains this gem:
2007 Massachusetts Comprehensive Assessment System (MCAS) statistics – 10th Grade
Proficiency and Above – English (%): 4.0%
Talk about fail…
Today, The Moomin is sponsored by the word teat.
Moomin@Teats’N'RusDOTorg
Inevitable potato reference.
Dear sweet Jesus…
what is it now?
Is this your second coming?
Buy 10 and your last coming is free.
I’m here to cleanse the world of sin……. but first….
Buy 10 and all of your cuming is safely caught.
Your english inspires us all, bravo!
It clearly states that Mr.J is offering 1 condom for the price of 10… Free question marks included
yay!
Wow, I don’t know what’s funnier: The questionmark after ‘Free’? 20 Years Guarantee? Home made?
I believe it would be the 20 years guarantee
i want one of those!
If they last 20 years, why do you need 10?
*sexual frequency fail*
Too many unrecycled rubbers are clogging our land fills. I think that their recycling program to have a single condom last 20 years will help big time.
Yes, recycling condoms; I’ve done some research in this area.
I’ve found if you shake the f**k out of them that tends to help.
If you shake that out then you don’t need the condom in the first place.
nice…very nice
Recycling Win!
Hand wash them. Not in the machine!
DO NOT PUT IN THE DRYER!!!
It’s best if you let your wife do the laundry. It’s her job anyway.
I thought you killed her?
I did? Hell, I’m doing so much here it’s hard to remember it all.
Yes, you even forgot that you’re supposed to live in the U.K.
Make sure she takes it off you before ironing
Yikes! Permanent press?
permanent mess…
He didn’t. He let the neighborhood coin laundry do it.
i farted
Ohhh, I hope the J stands for Johnny.
His first name is Bob.
Oh that makes more sense?
BJ. Took me a few minutes
*squeeze*
I was thinking ‘Bob Johnny?!? WTH?’
IT’S A TRAP!
PULL!
BLAM!
It did to me! *shrugs*
I wonder what Mr. J makes them out of
Leftover sausage casings.
moulded on his sausage
…to prevent mold on the sausage.
I can’t leave mine alone long enough to grow mold
A rolling saus-…Ehh, nevermind.
Rolling rolling rolling, rolling rolling rolling, rolling rolling rolling SAU-SAGE!
RAW HIDE!
which is what the home made condoms are made of
Bicycle tubes, i’d guess
Next he’ll say every one tested…
Sausage casings, I say! and he’ll swaer every one has been tasted!
Next he’ll say they’re delicious, every one has been basted!
Everyone is tested*
The demonstration is worth staying for.
/me grabs a chair and shits down, hands neatly folded on his lap, in anticipation of the upcoming event
Seberebe dondorondo (8)
Mahboobehs downdere (2)
All the better to hear you, my dear.
Could one really trust Mr. J? Seems kind of fishy if he won’t use his last name.
Its Jackson
Joe Jackson?
Michelle Jackson?
Randy Jackson?
Jackson Five?
I think that’s why A&P went out of business – no credibility.
Ah good old Mr J’s on Koh Tao, Thailand – top man, he’s got loads of hilarious signs like this around. He doesn’t actually sell home made condoms but does sell just about everything else.
Thumbs down.
At least Marcel can spell properly.
Yeah, it’s covered in letters and they aren’t in ABC order… X-P
2 fails this time: Sam’s speelling, and he’s not first.
Try capitalizing and using punctuation.
That’s better! Now use some words like “as”.
I like ass too! Oh wait…
I like donkeys too! Oh wait…
I like you too! Oh wait
I like you too! Oh wait…
yeah, Sam’s speelling really sucks.
I vote we go to the lolcats forum and have a serious debate on something at some point.
Seriously?
Srsly!
Orly?
Ohai! *waves*
O aye, there you are! *waves*
kthnxby
Maybe it was a bad idea? We’ve not even gone there and we’ve invaded our own thread with lolspeak?
lolspeak is addictive as it has few adjectives. Not as addictive as lolcode, but that is only true if you are infact a coder
Addictive??? Hell no! Contagious maybe. But, you see, no one is addicted to ebola.
You’re saying they’re using germ warfare
We’ve lost before we’ve begun.
May just go over to the lolcats and hand over our surrender.
Never. No surrender, even if it costs the life of my last brain cell!
IT’S A SIGN!
I went there and it was a potato!!!
I commented.
I would suggest that there’s a video posted there today which is prime for a failblog invasion. I’ll only say it involves a potato.
Beat you to it :p
Damnation, I failed to refresh my screen
And forgot to change my name back
Takes a while for the comments to show up there.
I can’t hang around upside down waiting all day!
Son of a!
Too slow again
*cries*
There there.
*pats McFail*
I left my footprint on lolcats too!
I tried… twice!
It ate my comments! There must be some lolcat laws against proper sentences.
I suggest we try and populated the Lolcat comments section with Failbloggers. Then we can finally have some proper English, not that butchered mangled language.
Sigh.
Populate. Must be the jet lag. Bukkit please.
BOGGY KAN GOES ANSTOMPS ON THE KITTIES’
OHNERS WHO TALKING ALL
IN STOOPID AN DUMB
WURDS STUFF! ??
BE FUNS!!
oh oh oh OH!BOGGY KAN GOES TAKES
THE KITTIES!
ME HOLDS ‘EM 4 RANS UM!
Um, what happens if the two fail blog monster were to meet?
BOGGY! Long time no see. We missed you.
Oh god, it does sound like fun!
I was thinking that yesterday!
Spam lolcats or ICHC with well articulated conversations!
Don’t invite me then!
You’re so getting dragged along.
But but but… I don’t know… *sigh*
I’ll piggyback you there?
You carry me an awful lot as it is.
on a barstool made for two?
As long as you get the grooves.
You steer, I’ve got gas. . .
Pfft!
*turns on*
*tunes in*
*drops out*
Bye guys!
*waves*
*squeeze*
*waves*
*squeeze*
Meh, settle. If she doesn’t go, she can’t arrive again, boys!
That comment was way better than everything that the trolls said yesterday. Or, as the day shall be known from now on, the Day Of Idiocy, when fail harbour suffered a surprise attack.
REMEMBER THE INFLATABLE FAIL!!!
*holds a minute of silence*
*plays the Last Post on trumpet as tear rolls down eye*
*fires 21 salute salvos*
*rings church bells*
*removes cap*
*runs around screaming*
They’re back!!!!!!
Blogmonster, what do you think we’ve been doing for the past few minutes?
*squeeze*
We need to think of a topic and make sure we all know it.
I can think of one we shouldn’t talk about! HAHA
*raises eyebrow*
*raises a question*
*raises the bar*
*limbos under bar*
That was low Arthur!
As low as I can go.
Can you get backup?
I think I broke something in my back. I’ll stay like this for the next days.
*squeezes Arthur back into an upright position*
That wasn’t my back. Don’t stop though.
*raises eyebrow*
Think it was more than she could handle, she’s had to go recuperate
I think she just didn’t like my bad impersonation of GCF.
There’s only one GCF.
*armshoulder*
I’m sure you didn’t scare her off Arthur.
You’re the best at being Arthur.
*does a pretty good impersonation of Arthur*
GCF, scares me more than Arthur. hehe
I just have things to attend to today.
*squeeze*
True.
*shoulders arm*
I would be the worst guy to have multiple avatars and usernames. I’d reveal my identity away after two or three posts.
Oops. Slow me.
Jam – more than me? I don’t want to scare you at all!
.
Authur – German curses!
Everyone here scares me to some degree Arthur.
Wisdom hurts.
Nu-uh.
Pain hurts. I experimented.
*jumps out of a scary looking cake* (carrot cake)
no pain no stain!
*group squeeze* So what topic are we ambushing those damn lolcats with?
Kant? The deeper meaning of life? Where Marx was wrong?
Oh and *squeeze*!
That damn website keeps eating my comments! It’s bullshit!
Can God create a rock so big he can’t lift it? If a tree falls in a forest and nobody’s around, does it still make a sound? Why does God allow evil?
What about “Who let that cat play with a potato without hanging curtains?” or “Does that cat belong to a vicar?”
*squeeze*
Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable.
Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
Who could think you under the table.
David Hume could outconsume
Wilhem Friedrich Hegel
And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart
“I drink, therefore I am!”
YEAH! DOWN WITH BAD GRAMMAR!
It’s enough to make me [sic].
Did someone say grandma?
NATURE NO FREE!
Gestation period fail?
Gestalt period? With Max, Christian and then later on Ernst und Kurt? – I loved that period!
Buy 10.. Get 1 baby for free.
Haha, I’ve seen that in person. It’s on Ko Tao, Thailand. It’s next to some wierd store which is covered whole in posters as wacky as this one. I dared not enter
I’ve been to Ko Tao. Missed the sign unfortunately.
It’s just south of the main beach, when the clubs end and the road starts to go a bit uphill. Somewhere around the middle of the hill, close to a police station IIRC.
this signs are everywhere on Koh Tao.
Mae Haad and on the right side you have a boy from isaan that have a massage studio.
cross the streets its a weird woman praying all day long and serve home made milkshake, remember to not drink from the straw’s that woman just own 5 of them HAHA.
going southwest you’ll arrive the beach you’ve to pay entrance fee.
Good morning all. Lets not rubber coat this.
What’s with the early condomnation?
Not sure he’s comfy with 20 years worth of exercise!
*profers lactic (acid)*
Unrelated: Today ken tried to win a Kindle.
Another unrelated headline: Pirate Bay founders sentenced to year in jail.
Yarrrrr! I heard. Wherrrrre am I going to get me software now yaarrrrrr?
whats a kindle?
To set fire or ignite.
Hah! Thank goodness you answered the question. Now, if only there was a way for someone to use an electronic device to type a word like “kindle” into a text box and search a collection of interconnected networks to find out what something means…
Brilliant! I’ll get to work on that straight away. Now if only I can think of a name for it…
An Amazon Kindle is a brand of electronic book. Does that help?
Must get awefully sticky after 20 years
Not to mention….um, so I’d better not mention it.
LA LA LA LA!!! Too early.
and smelly, specially if you went back door in the 90′s
But only if you used a condom.
Why is the sign questioning the deal?
“Buy 10 get one free?”
Maybe even the sign itself knows that’s not much of a deal.
141st!
wait a minute… that was a number fail?
This is from Koh Tao Thailand, seen it live. Mr J is a local lunatic and is also counting the tourists from which countries have the most come from. We asked him how hard do you work a day he said 20 hours then i have to make condoms. And the condoms are durex condoms with Mr.J:s tape attached.
I thought he was suggesting you could buy one of his kids as a prevention for haveing one of your own
Homemade??? Is Mr. J insane? I hope someone explained the 20 year guarantee. Is it before or after use? Or since it’s homemade, you end up pregnant and 20 years represent the child you will be stuck with – guaranteed.
No, you have sex and then 20 years later a child is born unto thee
Speaking from personal experience Granny?
Well yes, my husband, who got his tubes tied many a year ago accused me of cheating on him until I reminded him of our trip to Thailand.
*shoots pingpong ball accross the room*
You have sex and then 20 years later its legal
I don’t see how this could possibly end badly.
Wow, I quickly learned how the failblog community can hang someone by their balls so fast. I made the mistake of visiting one of the previous post where I made a comment if someone (who is engaged) is on her way to mental retardation. I was tying it to the marriage — mental retardation signs on one of the previous FailBlogs. HOLY COW!!! Talk about public prosecution.
–
Thank you to My Required Name for understanding what I meant.
–
My comment was harmless people!!! JEEEBUS!!!!!
Ball hanging is our specialty, also potato insertion, but that’s only if you have been good.
…and our potato insertions come with a 20 Years Guarantee.
I think you want sadomasacism.org…..completely different set of people there. And when I say different, I mean exactly the same.
Oh, here comes one of my prosecutors … :: walks on egg shells ::
*goes over and cleans up egg shells*
Failblog is always a mess in the morning.
LOL. Since I am sorta new here … is there a list of people I should be staying away from?
There isn’t one, as the people who you should be avoiding are trolls, who come and go. Just stay away from the trolls and you’ll be fine.
I was accused of being a troll yesterday for making a harmless comment. Hmmm…..who is who?
That’s strange. I’m sure it was, ironically, another troll who accused you of that. Don’t worry, you’ve already been accepted.
YUP!
LEILA is a purty flower!
flowers am BOGGY's Frends!
AWWW!!! Thanks BOGGY and BondFan.
It was me and Mr. Cuddles because she made fun of Dianatheinsane. I know she didnt mean it but we didn’t acost her too badly. If you can’t take what you dish out yourself than you don’t belong here noob. (Leila that is)
I can take anything you throw my way but I won’t be accused of being malicious because it’s not in my nature. I like to have fun. I like the banter that goes back and forth here. I haven’t met anyone I dislike…..so far.
–
I am good now … you and all the rest who misinterpreted my comments just needed to know. That’s all.
–
Happy Friday!!!!
TGIF.
Note: That means only 8 days left till my wedding.*gulp*
Wedding? Congratulations!!!!! Are you in the USA?
The one and only.
My condolen… I mean, congratulations!
Brewski, you’re bad.
–
Jules, where in the USA? I am in TX currently.
Pennsylvania, but the wedding is in Ohio.
A vegetarian living in Texas? Sounds lonely.
I bet when you tell people you don’t eat meat, they think you only eat chicken.
VERY LONELY HERE. I am constantly faced with brutes who think hunting a poor defenseless animal is a sport too. Overall, I don’t impose my lifestyle on them.
Here in NH you can pay money to step inside a cage and shoot “wild” animals.
BFF – Dragonwriter, Avis, myself (indirectly) and if I remember correctly the Ms B also had something to say about her.
*erases ‘the’
You can’t make friends with everyone. eFriends or otherwise. Ya know?
C’est la vie!!! I’ve moved on.
No, you certainly can’t.
STAYS AWAYS FUM ENNY BODYS
THAT BOGGY LIKE A STOMPS AND SMUSHES!
IFS BOGGY NOT LIKES THEN<B. THEMS A STOOPID TROLL OR IDIOTS
ALSO Skwerlly Bob TELLED BOGGY
“STAYS AWAYS FUM STOOPIDS WHO LIKES
TO SAY “PENIS” AND “POO POO” A LOT”
THEMS BADI’d stay away from Keith, savannahann
…ANNMARIE,….
and the vicar
:: writing them down on notepad for future reference :: Uh, huh….keep going.
Notepad? Don’t you have MS Word or OpenOffice?
Um…I don’t have a computer.
Oh! Try one, they’ve gotten rid of all those problems with having to replace vacuum tubes every few days.
NO WAY!! No one told me… LOL
WAIT! Where are you inserting said potato Jules?
Where said potato belongs… in the Vicar.
As long as it is the Vicar taking and not me ……….
Then I suggest not hanging curtains. EVER!!
Now, just how could you be hung by your balls, Leila?
If I had them, they would have used them to hang me Brewski. Nasty comments! Wow.
At least they didn’t hang you by your shoelaces and leave you upside down for an hour.
robbery *fail*
Leila has uttered the name of our Lord, lets get stoned for this
Stoned as in shit-faced OR stoned as in someone pelting your head with rocks?
♪ They’ll stone you when you’re posting on the Web…♪
♪ …like a rolling stone… ♪
Oh, just look at those pretendous condoms at the picture. They try to look happy, but I know they feel empty inside…
Did you notice the ‘stuff’ dripping for their mouths?
If that ‘stuff’ is for their mouths then why the condoms?
Things that make you go “hmmmm……”
And who says the free market is dead? Way to buck the corporate system Mr. J!
Hahaha, I love the question mark at the end…
have they been tested?
Kid tested, mother approved!
…and Pope approved too.
the sign looks photoshopped as hell
expecially the buy 10 get 1 free part
still funny though
In my country a vis is a fish, are you lord of the fishes?
It’s real (although the condoms aren’t), a few people that left comments have seen it in person, myself included. Mr J is a bit of a marketing genius, his shop and holiday bungalow are covered in similar nonsense and he does a good line in t-shirts with slogans like “fish for friend, not for eating”.
LOL, sounds liek a good deal, 10 and one free! Meh likez!
RT
http://www.privacy.pro.tc
20 years guarantee? Really?
Hey C:
Home made…
We really should all be working, especially you captain asparagus.
*moonwalks over there then back again*
*makes a sexy face*
yeah right!!!
I don’t get it. Where’s the fail?
I’m wondering the same thing.
fail?
i’m a bit lost here….
I hope they aren’t custom fitted. That would make it even more disturbing.
“Please stand right here while I measure your dimensions….. Sir, please tell me that’s not as big as it gets… Oh.”
Hmm..
First time posting on the FailBlog of the international spinnernets…
How are you doing?
Btw, that picture is not as much fail as so much else on the site. Although 20 years guaranteed. Maybe on the backside it says “Ideal for virgins and married people”
Who the hell would trust their life to home made condoms?
Condoms used to be hand-made with sheepskin.
yes, in many ways I owe that poor little sheep with a skin condition my life
And if they break?
Your guarantee runs out.
This fails in many ways.
last!
I like how the sign is utterly unsure if you get 1 free or not.
funnier would be an 8 month guarantee lol.
I farted.
WTF is with the question mark?
photoshopped
my 1 comment! im new to this blog and this is the 1 blog that i see that haves fails in it
I bought 10, but didn’t get one free.
:\
Buy 10… get 1… free? wtf?
They are made of wood.
Why are the condoms sticking their tongues out?
Isn’t it usually post oral-sex that you whip out a condom?
20 years guarantee? uummm… im not going to use the same condom for 20 years.
haha, that’s from a gift shop on koh tao in thailand!
this guy is in koh Tao (2nd recommended dive side in Thailand)
i laughed ass off my time when I was there … i actually wanna buy one as a gift though
Hahaha, gotta love Thailand.
.. Mr. Jay from ANTM makes condoms?
Made from the finest sheeps’ bladders!
lolz homemade? last 20 years?
this is messed up k?
20 years guanrantee could be a 20 hour guarantee its all the same they are useless after 1 use 0_o, unless your from belgium they use it 3 times
1st normally
2nd inside-out
3rd as chewing gum
I SAW THAT SIGN Actually there are many but THATS IN KOH TAO IN THAILAND
I never use condoms. Never! Aids is a myth!
I would rather call it ”Guarantee Fail”
shoes,oh my god ,shoes. look up the coral and kenzie show on youtube,it’s sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo stupid but those are my friends,except caden. coral and kenzie aren’t that stupid in person.kenzie is my ex and coral is my future. caden is that stupid.
this is just a strange photo, what does it even have to do with a FAIL?
and this is 20 years guarantee.
I’ve been there, Koh Tao, Thailand, Mr. J is a really strange man, (He tried to charge me for his business card)
Hi there, I found your blog by way of Google while looking for a comparable topic, your website came up, it appears good. I’ve bookmarked to favourites|added to my bookmarks.