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Cheezburger Network Blog
For once in my life…
Thank you! Cool avatar, too!
Thanks for whatz? And thanks for the comment on my avatar ^_^
For not being a troll. It means a lot to us. *squeeze*
I try *squeeze*
Its not hard…
step 1: never say ‘first’
step2: … actually there is no step 2 lol
What’s your avatar from?
i’m guessing a photo or something similar.
I loled
The internet!
Which I invented.
You are not Al Gore.
Notice the green avatar…proof enough?
*bows to Al Gore*
and… i am not sure what the anime is called. I found the stock floating around on the webz and loved it, so I uuussseeeedddd it.
no u said it
so, it’s a case of “the meek shall internet the earth.”
Hey hey hey careful!
The internet is seeriuz stuff!!
Stop laying claim to my invention.
Al gore didn’t invent the internet!!! >XC
*thwacks both spooky and kinokosama with the shellacked halibut*
Thaw that halibut and throw it on the grill!
*jumps back to party thread below*
*mooches another one of WN’s stouts*
That halibut is definitely not meant for eating.
*examines halibut more closely and notices the shellack*
Now I know why that tasted like a refinished armoire. Bleah!
Well, after a couple more stouts, I won’t even notice!
Not ’til morning at least.
*applies new coat of shellack to the halibut*
Gotta keep our weapons in good shape!
No thin veneer; lay it on thick.
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
*POUNCE!!!*
I’ll lay this on you thick!!
*smooooooochity!*
Honeyed lips!
*licks, goes back for more*
*smooooooch!*
I go to Red Lobster just for the halibut.
Throws it away, just for the halibut.
Darn. Puns aren’t funny when someone just made one right before you … DARN THE THREAD COMMENT OVERSPILL OVERFLOW TYPE THINGY!!!
Is calm now, has cookies.
after a couple of stouts the fishy taste disappears off of almost everything. before you say anything, yes, that has been experimentally determined.
how do I change my avatar?
you must pray nighlty to the avatar gods and one day your wish will come true
however sometimes you end up with a picture you might not like
Voice of experience SH?
*Dons protective goggles*
Really… I thought you chose that one.
gravatar.com (I’m not sure if that is the correct spelling)
You go there and attach a picture to the email you use for this site.
Should work.
Just checking to see if mine worked.
checking to see if it worked.
sorry if it double posts.
step3: repeat step 2
Your Smelcome
for once in your life what?
for once in my life I had a coherent thought… but I lost it.
Oh, don’t worry. I’ve had those before. I learned to ignore them, and now they don’t come back anymore.
I’ve had the same experience.
Coherent thoughts tend to get in the way.
THAT’S for sure! And then, you’ve……um….wait. What? What was I saying? Where…? Plums. I think I was talking about plums? Or something? Who AM I???
*gives Sparky a cookie and some attention* There you go, it’s alright.
*takes cookie* Thank you, Annie. *crunch crunch crunch* Is this real life? Am I going to be like this forever?
There is no such thing as “real life”. It’s a conspiracy that.. ohhh shiny!
Oh come on…surely not all the stories of this “real life” thing can be hokum and fairy ta…
Oooh! It IS shiny!!
Is it fair cast this “real life” as all smoke and mirro. . .
Oooh! Sparkly!
Come on, guys. Will you stop bickering? The real secret to life , the universe, and everything is…Wow!
I can see myself in it!
Pwetty…… ooooooooh
It…. glitters!
You guys are so… ohmigod, it’s SHIMMERING!!!
For Pete’s sake. I come on here looking to discuss the video in question, and all you can talk about is …
Dude, did they polish that or what?
No you won´t, that´s just the medicine.
…
Like always.
I’m not tired.
I was hoping you were going to sing the Stevie Wonder song….
I have that song in my head now. Good ear worm.. good…
For once in my life I have someone who needs me
Someone I’ve needed so long
For once, unafraid, I can go where life leads me
Somehow I know I’ll be strong
Oh no!! A sentimental earworm!!!
I…I am NOT crying. I just have something in my eye.
For once I can say “This is mine, you can’t take it!”
Long as I know I have love I can make it
For once in my life I have someone who needs me.
Tissue, Dragon? Or perhaps a ShamWow?
*WHOOOOOOOOOOOOONK!!*
*snoofle*
Tank you.
cookie?
You have my attention. What kind of cookie?
Let me know when you find out.
Myself, I just ate two (2) pieces of most delicious venison jerky
Ooooh, yum. Share??? You can have my cookie!
My Andrew’s brother makes venison jerky every year with the “harvest” they’ve made. Usually it’s mesquite flavored, or bbq, or hot, etc. This past year, he brought some up labeled “Uncle Luke”. I don’t know if they ever had an Uncle Luke or not, but I wasn’t going to try it!
The one kind that always makes you smile.
*nibbles incoherently on cookie*
*gets in line and holds out hand*
*hands chunk*
Smank you!
you’re smelcome
You said smelcome! Shall we start all over?
*hands out smores*
Seems appropriate.
*takes one*
*offers chocolate sauce and whip cream to top*
Yum…
This sure has been a tasty day! Beer, chips, cookies and now smores!
Best Day Ever!!!
No wonder I’ve gained 300lbs since I started reading Failblog.
S’more smores, please?
Some more of what?
Please, sir, I want s’more.
*whips up a huge new batch of s’mores*
Here ya go!
Nummy nums……thanks, Avis!
Don’t forget the whip cream, and thanks Avis. I vote
these best smores in FB.
Sorry about the arctic shelf sentence.
Thanks Avis!
Hee hee artic shelf sentence.
Ugh! I can’t c!
I thought maybe you were trying for “artistic”.
Now sea here you.
My artistic skills lie in between none and scarce.
Up there on the shelf?
In the vicinity ya.
wait, why are you putting so much emphasis on the h?
YOU’RE EATING HAIR
you’re saying it weird… why are you putting so much emphasis on the h?
you’re saying it weird… why are you putting so much emphasis
on the `h’?
How is this a fail? This is from the show pulp sport, its a comedy, he did it on purpose.
lol what a fadget
Cool dreads!
WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
Wind WIN!!!
Say that 5 times fast!
Free triple score, free triple score, frie… nyyyagh!
Three witches watch three Swatch watches. Which witch watches which. Swatch watch?
the first!
These two hosts actually also have a political party – The Bill and Ben Party – in New Zealand. They got more votes in the last election than the communists did – 10 fold in fact! I heart Bill and Ben
i’ve debated watching this due to the stupid “wins” they’ve been putting on. bahhh…
Bye Danny.
Don’t let the FAIL hit you on the way out.
actually, i was thinking he shouldn’t let it fail to hit him on the way out. in other words, IMPACT WIN!!
Git down wif yo bad self!!
He may have a point (I’m assuming it’s a he) … the slow motion rerun ‘win’ at the end of the videos is getting a tad annoying.
*ducks*
there’s nothing wrong with constructive criticism.
“DOT ORG!”
“HOT BORG!”
“NOT BORED”
^”!”^
*ponders Ms B’s graphic…*
Don’t… its not safe.
Leads to bad digestion problems.
It does make it hard to keep things down.
But I accidentially… now what?
DIE!!!
Not Zorg?
For Shmorg.
Fart Ork?
Oh de bork bork bork!
Dragon, Avis.. I need a little help. I was trying to remember Dilly’s favorite fail, but I couldn’t remember the name of that big ball that rolled over that annoying reporter… what is it???
ZORB!!!
But don’t say it in front of her…she’ll start to cry.
Did they break up again? I heard that Zorb, that slut, was sneaking around with potato fail.
Powered by our Admiral!
*salutes*
*salutes with something “special”* hehe
You are ready for Dancing with the Stars.
only with dakota fanning though… cause pedobear approves.
Hee, good one Starfish! There is only one contestant that dances with these stars.
*pirouettes*
May I have this dance?
Let’s duet…
Are you hungry…? How about a spicy salsa?
Now that you mention it, I feel a rumba in my tummy.
I thought I heard you ballet rumble! We’d better hustle.
*your
Sheesh. For that mistake, I’ll give you my lemon merengue pie.
Let’s share. I don’t want you to have an empty belly; dancing burns a lot of calories.
Excellent! Let’s have a picnic!
*spreads polka-dotted tablecloth on the ground*
Woot! *high fives AA*
*high fives!*
Hey, your hands ARE soft.
*gives AA a pat on the back and puts on pompous sounding accent or some sort* Jolly good show mate, jolly good.
Well done AA, got more power than the energizer battery(or the bunny) I guess. Just a rumo(u)r I heard, can you confirm?
*Holds out mic*
*gold clap for the Admiral*
What is the “powered by” thingie anyways?
(golf clap.. GOLF clap… Bukkit…)
*Knows the gold clap*
*Pulls away bukkit before fluffy mistakenly dunks*
*Hands turn a brassy colo(u)r*
*Now has the midas touch*
I thought I was the only one fluffy, thanks for giving me the confidence that there are others like me.
Thank you, fluffy! I will take this gold clapper and enjoy it with my favorite belle.
I may have bats in my belfry, but that idea rings true!
Congrats!
Where is he, anyway?
Don’t worry. He’s here. He’s always watching.
Thanks for the hearty smelcome, everyone!
See? ALWAYS watching!
Congratulations to you, how does it feel to be a generator of something, other then your intelligent wit?
P.S. I was a bit dismayed that the video passed by you so fast!
Thanks Retaba! It’s scary how kind you are.
See? Toldja.
Poor guy, he just wants a do over!
Why couldn’t the parachuting guy just jump off some scaffolding off camera and float in?
Well, that would be cheating, wouldn’t it! *shocked*
No scaffolding?
It takes a parachute a lot longer than that to work.
Not if a couple of people are standing behind him holding it open. Right? Any volunteers to try this theory?
I volunteer to push someone off some scaffolding!
I volunteer to pick the “jumper”!
I volunteer to pull the safety net away as they fall!
I volunteer to place the spikes directly under them!
I volunteer to, crap, I ain’t cleaning that up…
I volunteer to say “Smelcome everyone! Oh shit…”
I volunteer to randomly scream gibberish!!!!
I volunteer to construct the said scaffolding out of jenga bricks.
If the scaffolding is going to be made out of jenga bricks, I’m not so sure I want to be up there to push them off.
*reconsiders volunteering*
Volunteers to disallow deconstruction of tower till, Ms B is safe and sound on solid ground.
Much obliged!
I re-volunteer!
Notices the Ms. no problem ma’am. Volunteers a night out on the town?
How in the world can anyone say no to royalty?!
I am but a humble ruler, most here have humbled me many times. Though I am glad you have accepted, shows Ms B through all the many fails.
Aside from that, I enjoy the company of a woman that does not fall in love with property I own, but rather the personality I possess.
In that case it’s even harder to say no.
:-}
*assists in beating this horse to death*
Ease up, its had enough, now lets give it new life.
Just photoshop in the skydiver…
Because here in New Zealand we cannot afford scaffolding. Pulp Sport FTW.
Cause they tried to do it flawed so it would be funny, pulp sport is that kinda show
fourth win!
You *like* the WIN feature on these videos?
.
Huh.
yeah i do
I kind find other things I *like*, starts with a V, ends in elvet.
Lacrosse?
Whaddaya mean can’t?
Again, the look of confusion is just priceless!
Knocked himself out.
Smelcome to Failblog everyone.
why smank you
damnit… wrong level >.<
CLIPPY SAYS:
it looks like your hosting a program.. would you like some help?
Strange… MY Clippy says: “It looks like you’re hosting a party – would you like some beer?”
Sorry to be so bold…but can I come to the party?
*crashes party*
*brings chips*
*runs to the store to get dip*
He’s working late…bring someone cool this time!
NOT Clippy!
*takes some chips*
Are we gonna play poker? I’m going to bet the ranch.
*deals cards*
Queso what’s your first bet?
*ruffles stacks of chips*
*calls the blind*
Feel frito raise, darlin’…
No Chex here…I bet a month’s celery.
Go fish sticks.
YUMMY!
What a good way to blow off work! Chips and beer!
*returns from the store with dip*
Don’t forget the dip.
I think devin ^^ has the cookies.
Everybody’s welcome! (except trolls, of course – but then, we CAN use them for dart boards later in the party)
*pours shots of 1800 all around*
Thanks WN.
¡Salud!
Sláinte!
Yeah, when the inflatable ones pop and we run out of patches. No
beer for me, thanks, maybe a root beer insted.
I know I’m new here, but did someone say beer?
Yes.
Beer?
Yes please. Thanks.
Wait a minute, I can’t believe somebody said “BEER” and it took me this long to find out! Please tell me you have something besides Budweiser! Not that I’d look a gift beer in the head…
Oh good, it’s WN hosting. I’ll take a stout, please, thanks!!
Try this free sampler. Only 500 yen.
OK, but this better not make me pregnant.
Kilkenny.
Iki?
iki iki iki p’tang zowwhooop-aaah!
NI!
Couldnt find a haring or a shrubbery, and shows up with a iki beer
Oh my God, they Kildkenny!
LOL
THOSE BASTARDS!!!
Well, if he’s dead, we may as well drink ‘im.
Did you just say…??? nevermind. I don’t want to know.
Beer?
*bats eyelashes and looks hopeful*
Let me rephrase that…. Lager?
Sorry I’m new. I don’t know where WN keeps the beer, but I did find his supply of venison jerky. Would you like some?
Um… no thanks, I’m not really into venison.
*finds stash of beer*
Hey! Check it out!!
*starts drinking*
Got it. Deer is not a good substitute for beer.
-stares-
Cooked alligator tail?
Sounds… intresting.
…unless you like Does Equis.
OOOOOOOF!!!
…socks…everywhere…
*faints*
*catches, lays down gently, elevates feet, fawns over you*
You know I caribou you.
Indeed, this isn’t gnus to me.
*reaches up, lets down your hair*
*runs hands through the dangling coils*
*playfully mooses it up*
Uh-oh. My hair just got frizzy.
I think it’s going to rein,deer.
…Let’s go play in the puddles!
I’m always up for some rutting.
Wherever you go, I shall fallow, deer.
That instant was I turn’d into a hart,
And my desires, like fell and cruel hounds,
E’er since pursue me.
Thou wast the forest to this hart;
And this, indeed, O world, the heart of thee.
Ooh! yes yes yes!!
comment win!
That was a dumb fail
Is there a fail that isn’t dumb?… But yeeeaah… this was pretty dumb, way to spoil that intro… one of the dumbest
Do you now feel dumb?
i already saw this on youtube XD
Aren’t you special.
Short bus.
*opens earth under dale h – watches him fall in*
*closes earth*
Smanks!
And just who do you think you are? Chuck Norris?
Chuck Norris has nothing on Nellie when it comes to dealing with FailBlog trolls.
Wow! I wish I could do that! Too bad I can only fly…
I wish I could fly
I believe I can fly.
I swallowed a fly
When I swim, I fly
Man who catch fly with chopsticks achieve anything.
I heard a fly buzz when I died
Fly me a river
Pssst! Your fly is unzipped!
“The higher we soar, the smaller we appear to those who cannot fly.”
-Nietzsche
You’ll have a fly in the ointment if you’re careless zipping up.
Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana.
*zips in*
*group SQUEEEZE on the fly*
*zips out*
Fly me to the moon
Let me play among the stars
Let me see what spring is like
On Jupiter and Mars…
Fly me to the Moomin
Hi guys, im new but I do like what you guys have done with the place.
Glad you like it! Enjoy the nuthouse we call home. And go to gravatar.com to change out the mauve button to a cool pic of your choosing.
Didn’t somebody have some Depends in here the other day?
Hope so, cuz I’m not giving him the last ShamWow!
I personally prefer ShamWoohoo!s.
NO!
I think I’ve read your book.
Oh yes, The Yellow River, a grade-school classic.
I’ve seen his work last winter.
I believe you’re thinking of Ima Huskie.
Thank you. We hired a vicar to put up the kitchen curtains.
Naked?
Is there any other way?
I’ll bet the guy in the wolf suit is thinking, “You’ve got to be kidding me! All that, and he can’t get one line right?”
He could be thinking “which way to Grandmother’s house”.
Maybe some kid is crying his name…
Maybe he’s looking for some sheep’s clothing…
I do believe it is, in fact, a fox suit.
He was hounded to do the jump over again.
it’s actually a fox =P
It probably wasn’t scripted like that, but it was in keeping with the local New Zealand show (“Pulp Sport”) that it was from. It’s hosted by Jamie ‘Bill’ Linehan, and Ben ‘Ben’ Boyce, with appearances from Mascot (The person in the fox – not wolf – suit). The person playing Mascot changes from week to week, and is normally a New Zealand sports personality.
Pretty funny show for the Southern Hemisphere…my favourite segment is ‘Sporting Hell’ – can get pretty nasty though. Anyway, enough from me…here’s a link if anyone cares
– http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pulp_Sport
The guy in the wolf suit isn’t thinking that.
Because this “fail” was intentional.
Search for Pulp Sport on Youtube.
New Zealand humour
This is a programme from NZ and they probably did it on purpose – the whole show is a pisstake of broadcasting and sport…yay bill and ben! (they even had their own political party registered for the elections..haha)
I’ve never used this term before in my life (honest!) but what a tool!
*I’ve never used this tool before in my life (honest) but hands Pandemonium a 3/4″ crescent wrench*
I’ve never had a life before (honest!), but wrenches Pandemonium tool away from WhoaNellie.
I’ve never had a Pandemonium before, but ….
never mind. I got nothing.
Yeah, it kind of dead-ends, doesn’t it?
Someone threw a panda wrench in the works.
ACK!!!
*rescues panda*
*replaces with monkey*
Pandas are too endangered for such things!
I agree Dragon, less pandaring more aping.
That very nearly put a serious chimp in our plans! I could bear it if that happened.
^n’t
If it wasn’t for all this monkeying around in the works, none of this would have happened.
I would have been howlering my head off if it came to that.
With that it is bedtime for bonzo.
Goodnight folks.
Nighties, bonzo!
Wow. Behold the power of oblivious.
Smokem’?
Whose a pothead?
Whose naught?
Indeed.
In weed.
“What do you mean we can’t do that again?” Sure, but you wear the wolf suit.
I hope he was wearing his smellies because he sure stepped in it.
Smelcome Smarius!
Nice fox outfit!!!
looks a lot like crash bandycoot, except not really.
Why does every fail video have to have a win at the end? Its stupid, can’t somebody just fail without an inanimate object or word winning?
DOT ORG!!
SNOT GORG!!
HOT MORG!!
LOT PORG!!
???
Pot horde?
Dragonslayer? MEEP!
*hides in closet*
Pfft. You need a tougher hide than that.
I chuckled
Ah, Pulp Sport – legendary.
Finally!!
Someone who knows the show and doesn’t think this was actually a genuine mistake.
For non-New Zealand residents. Pulp Sport is a comedy show. They do that stuff all the time. That’s the whole gag.
Oh never mind. Go back to your sitcoms.
hahaha, he messed up!
Trows bukkit at host…
Life requires structure, discipline!!!
Hmm…didn’t you just post the exact same thing yesterday? On that uppercut fail vid?
Oops, i meant to reply to the guy above.
*capitalizes I*
Bobby, you’re correcting your punctuation now? Wow, I’m impressed!
Yeah, I still kinda feel like I’m in school though.
Hand that noname fellow a beer.
*hands Bobbynoname a beer*
*snatches it away before being arrested for contributing to a minor*
*replaces “punctuation” with “capitalization” in previous post*
*grabs beer and stuffs under hat*
You and that hat, Guillermo, I swear, one of these days….
*shakes finger @ willdog*
What show is this? I’m still interested.
Its called Pulp Sport its a New Zealand TV show with lots of spoofs and stupid things… This would have been deliberate NOT a fail…
Oh, don’t ruin it for us… Nothing we hate more than finding out the fail is not a fail.
Yea…whoever thought this was a fail totally missed the point. Pulp Sport is a show of fails…and some awesome wins…on purpose.
Yea. I agree. Pulp sport is a spoof show with lots of silliness. If this wasn’t on purpose (which it probably was because they still put the music in), then they probably don’t care and are going to show it anyway.
Look em up on You tube
agreed!
Pulp Sport may be hilarious, but Bill screwed that up well and truly! The look on his face – no way that was deliberate!
[b]This[/b] [i]is[/i] just a test post.
What’s the correct format for bold and italic?
instead of [ and ]
“less than” and “greater than”
instead of [ and ]
Hmm…like this?
Thanks!
Testing…How do you make it blue?
blue?
I know there’s a way…
Oh! I think I remembered.
Oh cool, how did you do it?
a
This is “strike”This is “i”
I think this is "code"Thanks
Mark text you like, then right click and choose “view selection source”. It will give you the code. Boggy’s posts are always full of good code.
Testing…
Testing…
Testing…
Testing…Still Testing...*gives willdog a gold star*
A gold star for me!
Did I do good on my test, teacher?
Yes, you did. Now where’s my apple?
*hands pretty teacher an apple*
Ahem.
I meant…an appletini
Easy on the tini?
No.
Heavy!
Most decidedly no.
Well, ladies, what do you say? At toast to celebrate….uh….to celebrate….oh, Hell, to celebrate the fact that We [women] Rule The World!
*raises glass*
To us!
Woohoo!!
*clink*
(BTW…are you pondering what I’m pondering…?)
I think so, but where would we get enough chocolate for that?
Here’s the appletini you ordered.
*makes exit*
I bet the Dancing With the Stars host smelled that, too.
Can someone say what happened for people who have no sound?
Apparently, the host smells man gravy and is upset he can’t do it again ‘cuz the wolf has landed.
“Man gravy”?
It’s a fox, not a wolf =P
Roughly from memory…
The announcer says something to the effect of (paraphrase)
“Hello everybody, and smelcome to… oops, I just said ’smelcome’, can we do this again? We can’t?”
Now, go ask the IT department for a sound card!
Addendum: Then he says “Aw, shit.”
Addendum to the addendum: The other guy says”Are you @$#^%@ kidding??”
(maybe he didn’t say the $#%^& part, but I’d like to remember him that way)
Hahaha! Pot head!
This should be one of those Snickers “Wanna get away?” commercials.
I just product-failed!
Perhaps I am the pot head?
I meant Southwest. Duh!
(that was a Haiku)
Wanna get away, sawtooth?
I always thought he was a ridged actor.
Ummm…. I’m not really sure what to do here.
Can I get this one?
Go for it!
Anti-climactic, I know, but I don’t want to resort to our old tazer full pages. It was worse then the perpetrators.
*Than* arg…
Proposes new product. The “Ignore all copycat shades”. *Not effective against Glowers*(how do you do tm?)
Allow us to forgo the boring drool posted by imitators. Quantity limited, price non-negotiable (free).
I like! Spring break seems to have brought out the imitators, hasn’t it?
I don’t know how to get a TM symbol either.
Well as long as you get that I was crediting it as your trademark. Yes spring break has brought out those loathsome copy cats.
Oh and *hands Avis a pair of the stylish looking shades*
Why thank you!
*dons shades* Wow, these are DARK!
That way it prevents all blight from entering the eye.
hold ALT then press 0153 and let go
™
Thanks.
*adds alt+0153 to repertoire*
Do you know how to do the musical notes, too, Bobby?
*knocks over cardboard cutout*
*steals cardboard cutout to display in her home next to the Oprah cutout*
Oops. Um…did you want that fluffy??
*hands over small pile of ashes*
I…um…sowwy.
…Well, people impersonating my Admiral piss me off!
*stares at small pile of ashes*
What do I do with this? I can’t even make a hat or a brooch or a pterodactyl…
But there’s a sale at Penny’s!
Dragon I have a product for you above, I hope you will like them, they come in many styles and designs.
Do we really need to have a ‘win’ on the end of every single video?
Yes.
Reply win!
Avis
April 15th, 2009 at 12:44 pm
Yes.
™
Do we really need to have this question asked 10 times on every video?
Also yes, as they seem slow to understand, like filling a bucket, that has no bottom with a thimble. Eventually they will give up.
“Eventually they will give up.”
I don’t know, Trolls™ are persistent little buggers.
Aye, that be correct, though with the product I offer, the life blood of trolls (attention™) will be drained from them, and they will shrivel up and sod off.
Correction products*, its becoming a lucrative buisness.
*ahem* Business
I’m on fire with errors today. Dragon did you get me while I wasn’t looking :O?
If Dragon had gotten you, you would most certainly know it!
Most certainly, I just wanted to play on the on fire part, plus it may be me, but I’m missing her posting at the moment.
Bobby, stick around a while longer, they ask that every single time, they claim fake, photoshop, first, they tell us it’s old or that they saw it at some other site already. They do this every day. For pretty much every fail. At least 10 of ‘em do this.
Avis, I believe in uppercut fail, I gave out “first and all denominations (numbers and spelling) blindfolds” Makes those types of posts transparent and less irksome. Here’s a pair. *Hands over blindfolds* Don’t worry they don’t impair vision at all.
It never ceases to amaze me how ardent the trolls are. How very much they NEED to tell us whatever it is they want to tell us. How they think we care. Also it’s amazing that they have so MUCH to complain about, this being a free site and all.
You see, they don’t necessarily need to discuss their problems, mummy and daddy aren’t giving them the attention they crave. Therefore, the computer being one of their babysitters is where they attempt to pool all the attention they can get in a day, just so they don’t feel so alone.
*hopes he didn’t repeat what Avis said*
*looks up ardent*
I have had to deal with many, many trolls on some other sites before, where i’m a mod, the majority of them are 12 year old kids. And some are just downright stupid.
The one’s we get here are stupid as well. Though, I think some are older than 12. It’s my opinion that they are in their late 50’s fat, balding and sitting in their mom’s basement surrounded by Dungeons and Dragons lead figurines that they have painstakingly painted. And a mound of McDonald’s wrappers.
*takes back that apostrophe from “ones”*
Did you tell him about Closet/Kelly? Man we get some dedicated trolls on this site.
I honestly think some are just first-timers. So they don’t realize that 20 people do this every day. It’s like a guy I know named Chuck. People who meet him will say, “What’s up Chuck?”, and think they are very witty. He just instantly replies “Vomit!”. Then they slink away.
I understand how he feels. I have a couple of small benign tumors that are fairly visible, when asked what they are (you’d be amazed how rude people are) I tell them that it is a tumor. Inevitably they say “It’s not a tumah”. I’ve started responding to that with “It’s cancer”. It’s not, but boy, does it shut them up fast.
Wow. Good strategy.
Well, I don’t care if you have tumors or not.
*squeeze*
Awww! Thank you!
*squeeze*
You should see the looks on their faces when they hear that! Totally worth it!
I walked into the grocery store one day, and one of the workers there said, “Hey! You’re limping!” I smiled, since I thought he was expressing concern…until he said, “Did you kick the hubby?” I blinked. “What??” I asked. “Did you kick the hubby??” he asked loudly, grinning as people stopped to stare at me.
I immediately scowled. “Did he come here and tell you that?” I demanded. “He DID, didn’t he?? He came in here and told you that I kicked him!! That BASTARD!! I didn’t kick him my FOOT SLIPPED, but let me tell you, you can tell him next time you see him that I WILL kick him if I ever see him again!”
This last part was tossed to his rapidly retreating back. He couldn’t get away fast enough. I smiled pleasantly at the staring people and limped away to do the rest of my shopping.
*ROFLSNORK!*
I can totally see you doing that, too!
LOL that’s awesome! I wish I knew you in real life. I’d love to hang out with you and scare people.
Hee…!
Seems I either draw ‘em in close or make ‘em run far, far away…!
I think we should have a fail-gathering and unnerve people.
Wow, may I ask as to the real cause of your limp? My father has one because he had to get most of his cartilage operated on after tearing both mcl, acl and a partial on his lcl.
Well, obviously I didn’t kick my hubby. I’m not married.
…I kicked my boyfriend.
Did you don steel toe boots at the time?
Ok, the filter seems to have gotten that last one. I told you about the jerk my mom kicked, didn’t I? The jerk that I had had a run in with? She got him while we were at a concert! It was a beautiful thing to watch!
I would like to cheer on your mother for that one, it must of been quite a show.
He completely deserved it.
BTW, I found a fantastic new site! It’ll only kill five minutes or so, depending on how fast you read, or can figure out what it did, but it’s hysterical!
Oh, Avis, that was great! Thanks for sharing!
How far did you get?
Uh…’bout 2 minutes into the second go-round. I thought there was another trick or something…
It took me about that long to figure out that it HAD gone into “round 2″ so to speak. But I giggled like a school girl through the whole thing!
Have you no self-control? The instructions are clearly marked!
None.
That made me *snork!* Thanks, Avis.
Me, neither.
(Kinda makes you wish you were older, eh, Hammy?)
Oh, I wish I hadn’t said that.
I hope the poor lad doesn’t implode or something.
BWUAAHAHAA!!
*ahem*
Sowwy.
Heeheehee!
I’d stop giggling if I could. Really! I would!
I think.
Was very fun Avis thanks for that.
That was neat, Avis! Thanks.
I agree with Avis, most are older than 12, they are masters of repetition that is for sure.
That quite a disturbing image.
That’s*
What show is this? I’m still interested
The show is called Pulp Sport from New Zealand, and the mistake is deliberate… it’s part of the show
O
Thanks for ruining the joke for me, Owen.
Sadly, there’s a buzzkill in every thread.
Indeed >.> i was laughing untill Mr Hotshot had to open his freakin mouth
Look into my eyes – you will see
What you mean to me
Search your heart – search your soul
And when you find me there you’ll search no more
Don’t tell me it’s not worth tryin’ for
You can’t tell me it’s not worth dyin’ for
You know it’s true
Everything I do – I do it for you
Look into your heart – you will find
There’s nothin’ there to hide
Take me as I am – take my life
I would give it all – I would sacrifice
Don’t tell me it’s not worth fightin’ for
I can’t help it – there’s nothin’ I want more
Ya know it’s true
Everything I do – I do it for you
Mmmmm, Bryan Adams.
Thanks, Shane.
what is the song in this video?
Its Ol’ Skool by The WBC
“Ol’ Skool,” – WBC. NZ ska. Good luck with that.
I tried posting last night. Must not have worked. The song is “Ol’ Skool,” performed by The WBC out of NZ.
Its ‘Old School’ by the WBC, a New Zealand band that is unfortunately now disbanded, their stuff is still around though.
FAIL FAIL obviously a joke
Yep, this is a great piss-take TV show on New Zealand TV it’s called “Pulp Sport” and it’s all about fails, so this clip was supposed to be the way it is, smelcome and all.
The 2 guys in it are called Bill and Ben and they actually entered the official election last year and got more votes then one of the conservative Christian parties!
Funny stuff.
what band is singing the song?
reel big fish I think
Sounds like The Managers, a passable pub-ska band from New Zealand.
totally fail!!!
This is pulp sport an new zealand show, they have lots of stuff like this, this was almost definately deliberate and NOT a fail.
It probably was originally a fail, they just put it in because it fits what the show is about. I love Pulp Sport!
Yea im from NZ and this is not a fail the whole show is fust funny stunts and gags its quite a good show
Yeah it’s from pulp sport, a bloody good show from NZ. Most likely deliberate, but if it wasn’t it would’ve just added to the humour anyway.
“DOT ORG!”
#2
*gives more power to Cloral*
Wow… can’t retake w/ landing.
yayyy NZ represent lol was a deliberate joke u fools not a fail
Skydiving Furries FTW
Okay I see very few people acknowledging that this is obviously staged.
But who cares?
That guy over there.
Ok, who cares that WE care about?
Okay, I see at least 5 people acknowledging that this is staged. Ya know what, I still don’t care.
I like to think it was staged and that this was take five. In the other four takes he said “welcome” by mistake.
a real mess
IM ON A BOAT ,
Probably right! I’ve seen the show. Still funny though.
wow. awesome blog.
thengkewveddymuch
Now that was just painful. Just like every other fail on this site. Love it!
In all of these Failblog (.org) videos I’m never sure if I’m watching a FAIL or a WIN. Was that a FAIL? Or was that a WIN? G*ddamn purposeless invasive video editing. Makes me so mad!
what’s the truth about the universe ?
yup that isn’t a fail. its setup. lol
I found this video rather immusing.
Its just Bill and Ben being Bill and Ben. Pulp Sport is so damn funny checkout my youtube link.
just lol
Okay!
*lols*
It’s Bill and Ben!!! Pulp Sport rocks
does every video really need a WIN?
win fail, if you ask me
Did we?
Sorry.
I don’t remember asking.
Oh, no! He said “win fail” – in the same breath! The universe will surely collapse now! With the horse! Run!!!!
My youtube doesn’t work at my home computer.
What am I missing?
Life, willdog. You’re missing out on life.
Ooooohhh. That’s the problem.
Fail Blog fail.
Pulp Sport is always doing shit like that, pretty sure it was deliberate.
GAH! This is another fake fail. Clearly, it’s a joke on one of those stupid skaterz boy shows.
I can’t believe how much you people have been brainwashed. This is like paying $5.00 for a loaf of bread, and thinking you got a bargain because all the other loaves were $7.00, but then you left the shop and went passed another shop and saw the SAME LOAVES OF BREAD selling for like $0.73 or something.
YOU’RE ALL STOOGES!
It doesn’t mean it wasn’t funny.
Why is it that you guys all seem to think we believe this stuff? Why can’t it just be funny?
WHAT??? You mean you DON’T believe everything you see??
I…I feel so alone…
*cries*
There, there. *pats Dragon on the back* Just most of it.
Because, Avis… like i said, this is like when you watch a porn where they say their paying two straight guys to go down on each other, and they’re fooling aruond, but you know they’re both gay anyway and it’s all a load of crack.
ya know?
this isn’t a fail… it’s a win. garsh.
meanwhile, did anyone see that lindsay lohan vid on the dating site? god i hate her.
Because, “Avis”. GD you’re a dick. You’re pretty right it’s funny.
But this is beside the point. Look at the Chicago Police cup last fail. I mean, obviously someone just paid $2.84 to have that cup printed at the $2 shop.
Where’s the integrity, “Avis”? Is it a fail if I decide to post a fail, so I do a shit in a toilet and then take the flush buttons off it so I can’t flush it? So I can’t flush now? No, it’s not. It’s staged, it’s a win.
It’s a GD win.
^^ completely in love.
It’s more like us getting a loaf of bread for free. And then we get people like you complaining about it.
Brainwashed? Please.
Psst! Hammy, clickie! You’ll laugh, I promise.
Hmm…
Great so now my Firefox is jumping out of air planes in New Zealand when I’m not around.
Get back in the box! >O<
Silly foxy
Bill and Ben!! Totally not a fail.
Really? I had no idea…
Is anyone else getting sick of seeing a win on EVERY VIDEO!? There doesn’t have to be an opposite win for every fail on FailBlog. It’s just stupid. Smelcome win? I don’t think so. By turning all these dumb little things into wins, it’s ruining the integrity of a true win. The rare, and usually exciting, “win” no longer exists, as it’s selling out. I don’t want to have “winning” ruined by becoming a mainstream and common thing. After all, this is FailBlog, not WinBlog. I definitely may have analyzed this too much, but please just stop adding all the petty wins to every video
smelcome. HAHAHA fail
Lol, its Bill and Ben.
failfailfailfailfailfailfailFAIL!
Falafel!!!
BILL AND BEN!
Not a fail. Epic wins!
NZ Represent!
I love them. I voted for them in the election. lol.
haha i seen that show its lame
Spell Fail…
Placement Fail… WIN!!!
Sad… LAWL
You obviously do not understand Pulp Sport. Probably fake.
1 word, furry
That was a WIN not a FAIL. They did it on purpose. . . I mean come on, it’s Pulp Sport.
Oh and New Zealand rocks btw
That was definitely a Win for Bill and Ben, not a Fail. I mean come on, it’s Pulp Sport!!1!
NZ rocks btw
NZ doesn’t rock. It’s about time you guys federated with Malaysia and Papua New Guinea and lived up to your responsibilities in the world.
But, yeah not a fail. Failblog fail.
wtf? do you even know anything about NZ, Malaysia or Papua New Guinea!?!!! these countries are NOTHING alike???
What are you, American??
If so, you’re one to talk about responsibilities in the world.
*sniffs*
I can’t smell come.
The come is a lie.
Please, for the love of god, stop making these videos with an “Something-else-in-the-shot win.” It doesn’t make any sense and isn’t funny. I believe just because a fail happens doesn’t mean that a win also has to happen. I don’t care if you have a replay of the video, but that shouldn’t constitute a win.
I can assure you they do not care what you think. Keep your eyes open for a failblog clone that is not owned by complete morons.
Hello and smell cum.
What a douche
That dude really needs a haircut, seriously.
RT
http://www.privacy.pro.tc
Moderators here are communists.
good music, but funny rating = 0
The interviewer is smokin’ hot… He looks like Jon Davis from Korn.
This is pulp sport.
They always do shit like this.
Definitely deliberate.
Still funny though…
The band, for everyone asking is a NZ band called WBC, and the song is Ol’ Skool.
There you go, and no, don’t worry, I ain’t that cool. I just searched till I found it cause Ska is awesome and there is never enough.
it wasn’t that much of a fail. if anything it adds to the humor of the show. knowing bill and ben, it was probably intentional. the guys are hilarious. honestly, watch the show yourselves, its the funniest thing to come out of new zealand since flight of the conchords
Deliberate humour on a very funny NZ show. Do people not check out where clips come from before submitting them?
Yay Pulp Sport. This TV show is a complete piss take. loves it
I LOVE PULP SPORT~!
Anyone know what the music to this is?
Duh, never mind, just spotted the comment a couple of inches up that answers my question. Sorrys!
Smelcome… what’s the story behind that?
woah, pulp sport rox!, it is the funniest show ever here in little old aotearoa(new zealand)! i hope the third season comes out soon!
Wow that wasn’t funny at all!
Not really a Fail — its a Pulp Sport joke.
OMG!! Bill and Ben!! Pulp Sport ftw.
This was planned you know, so its not a fail.
Man, people seriously need to stop putting ‘win’s at the end of their movies. Smelcome win? Unnecessary. Still, epic fail haha. By the way, does anyone know the band who did the song when the dude was skydiving?
Yeah. It’s a Kiwi (aka New Zealand) group called the WBC.
DAMM U PEOPLE!!
This is a New Zealand show and it was in the script! Its meant to be stupid! Thats the point.
This isn’t a fail, it’s Bill nad Ben, they are popular TV hosts in New Zealand and do stuff like this all the time for their show. it’s just a joke. Definately deliberate.
Funny guys.
lolol, thts Ben off Pulp sports. That was a piss take, they always do that kindof of thing. So yeah it was planned, not really a fail.
But funny all the same ^^
the host is a tool
Lol, that’s Pulp Sport! Basically a low budget comedy show in New Zealand. Man I miss that show… Anyways, it was started with a dude and his own video camera. I doubt that was an accident. =D
LOL, sports cafe. New Zealand.
It’s most definitely NOT Sports Cafe.
It’s Pulp Sport, as mentioned in a large number of the above and below comments.
Furries FTW.
I always watch this show lol, and I always knew he’d stuff it up one day xD
Bill and Ben for the win! Those guys are a political party in NZ. Believe it or not.
This is from the show PulpSport in New Zealand. its a comedy show
Gotta love Bill and Bin. *has love for Pulp Sport*
I’m SURE that was intentional.
I love Pulp Sport….
Pulp Sport is an essential part of life in new Zealand. It’s up there with Wattie’s Tomato Sauce.
Pulp Sport Rocks Bring it back on lol Bil an Ben are funny
lol those guys are new zealanders. they probly did that on purpose.
hey guys this is a kiwi show-a comedy show! The joke is meant to be that he stuffs up and that they can’t do the retake because of the Mascots skydive, hehe. kiwi humour is odd, yes, but its funny in New Zealand.
(Bill and Ben are the names of the hosts-its called Pulp Sport if you ever get the chance to watch it..)
The two of them also have (had?) a political party in New Zealand. And I wouldn’t e surprised if they aired that, knowing Bill and Ben… If you watch the show, that looks intentional. Although it probably wasn’t.
Gotta Love Pulp Sport. “I think the Amazing Race is copyrighted; how about the Amusing Race?” (Ultimately won by the mascot).
the guy in the dreads = yummy! ^_^ (and i feel for him! ive had multiple days like that!! lol just in general conversation lmao)
This is from a TV show in NZ and theyre actually just taking the piss. They do stuff like this all the time. Its a comedy show.
I love that show. It’s hilarious!
This is from Pulp Sports, a New Zealand based comedy-sports show. Surely a fail doesn’t count if it’s done intentionally?
nice comeback!
Wow. at first i thought
“i need to tell people that this is a New Zealnd show and this was probably deliberate.”
then i realised that my comment would be made redundant by the billions of comments above saying the same thing. Well done to us New Zealanders for our need to be known to the rest of the world.
Nooo, It’s the season final tomorrow ):
By the way, @pulpsport rules you spelt New Zealand wrong.
sorry, typo.
New Zealand
Aotearoa
don’t worry, im Maori, not exactly famous for typing are we.