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How?
Well, with the help of a little Baconlube, you should be able to take the potato and… oh, you mean the fail?
This is what happens to cheerleaders after high school – they go to work in toy factories.
at least they’re not chess masters
Or former members of the Bush Administration.
I think that red thing is a WMD…
I see no FAIL here.
What am I missing?
Are we all forgetting about tolerance and diversity?
HMMMMMMMM?????
Yeah, that’s just a native American dressed in whiteface. Great costume!
its Chuck Norris dressed up as a native american, but he doesnt need the costume, he is everything at the same time!
Except for someone who is able to beat bruce lee. He is never that.
Finally, someone brings that up. Bruce Lee > Chuck Norris > Everyone
Bruce Campbell > Bruce Lee + Chuck Norris + Everyone
Hee…! I like the way you think.
Brucie Kabutz >> Bruce Campbell any day !
Dragonwriter is a winner.
Katz is horribly mistaken, albeit creative with the >>
Well, BOGGY is most certainly > Bruce Campbell
Sorry…must respectfully disagree. Bruce Campbell makes me lol!
Army of Darkness-era Bruce Campbell does more than make me lol…
Lol and drool?
And mayhap…tingle?
Oh my, yes. Gimme some sugar, baby!
It’s a cowboy, so what lame fail
☻/
/▌
/ \
bobfromyoutube blog at wordpres
im on myspce and twiter.
Bruce Lee is dead. He loses.
bruce lee = dead
chuck norris causes death.
therefore chuck norris is the cause of and bruce lee is the effect chuck norris > bruce lee.
I think the way you like
True.
True. This is just camouflage.
They dress like a sheep to hunt sheep.
They dress like a white man to…
Political correctness FAIL.
But camouflage WIN
Next in this series: the ‘predator’ action figure with pump action bow and arrow
BaconLube sold separately.
BTW Warpie… Where in VT? I lived in the Burlington area for 17 years.
I live in burlington *contrite look*
I live on spear st., about a 5 minute walk from UVM.
Nice. I lived in Essex literally two doors down from Sand Hill park.
I will actually be up that way again in the end of May. Hope the weather nice then…
Should be… I will be in New Mexico the middle two weeks in may…
Ya, just because he is white does not mean he can’t be a Cherokee.
or any of the idiots in the present administration.
he must be chuck norris.
Well, he’s about to blow the wheel off those poor settlers’ wagon, that’s for sure.
If it was Chuck I suspect he’d just roundhouse kick the wagon.
If it was chuck, he would stare at the native americans until they freaked out and destroyed their own wagons.
Wait, the Native Americans are in the wagons?
*Circles the wagons*
*Sets up Blackjack table*
Yes, I know that was wrong.
*stacks chips at table*
If it WAS wrong, I don’t want to be right.
*antes*
IT’S CONAN!
I THINK THAT IS THE DUDE IN THE WAGON
History sure would have been different if native Americans had weapons like these.
Well for a start, there would be no national language: Just dialects of Sioux, Dakota, Iroquouis and Apache.
And it’d be COOOOOOOLD in those teepees we’d be living in in the winter.
Plus all that smoke from the fire in middle of the teepee would be bad for my sinuses.
Depends where you live… The coastal longhouses in the Pacific NW were relatively comfy!
I’m >in< the Pacific NW. Had 4 feet of snow in my front yard a coupla months ago.
But I do like coastal salmon
I’m jealous… lived my whole life in Seattle area (brother in Portland), then moved 5 yrs ago to New England. I’ll trade the winter we had this year for yours, anytime!! Snow, snow, snow, I can’t take any more, make it stop!!
Exactly how we feel in North Idaho, trust me!
DAMN that Global Warming!
Two weeks of fine weather – yay! Almost 20 degrees Celsius right now
But I’m inside, working. 
It’s been spring for a few weeks here. In fact, I was wearing a t-shirt and shorts not three days ago. Then it snowed the next day. It’s 6 Celsius today. I hate these weather swings.
Could happen here too. I really hope it doesn’t!
We have a frost/freeze advisory for tomorrow.
*cries*
IN Minnesota, we are having the most unwinterish weather ever!!!
REALLY? It’s supposed to reach 50 here! How is that possible?
50? *feels jealous*
50? *googles “Celsius Fahrenheit converter”*
Try Montana. We had a day where it got to 65 then that night we got snow for a full day. now it is going to be 60 for a couple of days, then snow again.
Last weekend we were supposed to get a blizzard, possibly a foot of snow. We got approximately a quarter of an inch that melted within 20 minutes.
Must be that global warming thing. Making all this snow fall. Don’t get me wrong I love snow, but when it’s spring/summer, stop snowing!
I personally don’t see the problem with global warming. Bring it on!
Sorry. I don’t know if i was clear. My global warming comment was meant to be very sarcastic. I like all weather, I just want it to be consistent. No summer weather and then making me pull out a snow scrapper to drive home at night.
You guys wanna read an excellent book, try State of Fear by Michael Crichton. I highly recommend it, both as a great read and as an education about what’s really going on with “global warming”.
Using Michael Chrichton as a reputable source for pretty much anything is slightly ridiculous. He’s a good read, if that’s your thing. But he’s not exactly a reliable source of factual information.
I’m sorry, that came out snarky, but I’m not sure how to say it.
I really don’t mean to offend.
“Eaters of the dead” is great! But also not reliable.
His data was taken directly from NASA and NOAA – three years of research before writing the book, because he wanted it to be accurate even though it’s a novel. If you’re saying that NASA and NOAA aren’t reliable sources, I really don’t know how to respond
I call to mind the Challenger.
He used their data but he most certainly tweaked it. He writes novels, not scientific manuals.
I doubt that he tweaked it – his whole point would be skewed if something so asily verified were tweaked. You’d need to read the afterward in the book, I suppose, but the whole point was about how data are intentionally skewed by the global warming proponents as a way to make money and gain control over people.
If his charts and data were compared to the charts and data they were taken from and found to be modified, he’d be an obvious fraud. Instead, there has been no rebuke – at all – from the “scientific” community. The reality is that there are MANY – and more every day – scientists who say it’s a natural phenomenon and that we’re actually heading into a cooling cycle.
Michael Crichton… great read? *cough*
*hands Aerliss a cough drop*
Been hanging out with Avis?
I don’t really pay attention to the global warming thing. It’s pretty much irrelevant in most people’s day to day life.
Energy conservation? It’s just good sense. Saving energy saves you money.
Alternative forms of energy? We can’t subsist on fossil fuels forever. Regardless of how bad they are for the environment, there is a limited amount to be found on Earth.
And by the way, there are about 50 major US publications listed on Amazon that lauded the book VERY highly.
hehehe… but I’m sure you’re right
Crighton is notorious for tweaking facts to fit his plots. Many, many writers do it. That doesn’t make him a bad writer.
The fact that he’s a bad writer makes him a bad writer.
Our media is notorious for tweaking the facts. Don’t trust the media farther than media farther than you can throw the TV.
Global warming hysteria is nonsense.
1. The sun is getting brighter and other planets and moons show evidence of warming in last 20 years.
2. Strong historical climate variablility with zero human involvement. which is greater than what some models predict due to increased CO2.
3. There is no runaway greenhouse effect due to CO2 or methane, because incrementally more CO2, has incrementally less effect.
4. Water vapor is BY FAR the largest greenhouse gas, and we ain’t going to “control” that.
5. Historically CO2 levels PRECEDE temperature, not the other way around.
6. Al Gore is an idiot.
7. Global warming is an excuse for global socialistic governance. .
8. You’re actually worried about a 1-2 degree warming and a 2-3 feet increase in sea level in the next century ?
9. This will cost TENS or possibly HUNDREDS of TRILLIONS of dollars over the next few decades.
10. It would be yet one more reason for jobs to flee the country, and go to countries that are not bound to abide by this.
“6. Al Gore is an idiot.”
Well, you do have a point there.
I mean, you cant argue with that.
Idaho! I grew up in Pullman, just a hop away!
No worries, here ya go:
*hands a large can of sunshine to WN*
Don’t use it all in one place.
Thank you, thank you
And yes, sometimes I really miss Los Angeles…
or the lack of warming thereof.
*waves hands in air and chants anti-snow spell*
*Nothing happens*
Sorry about that. I seem to have run out of anti-snow magic.
*shrug*
I think it may have worked after all, the sun is shining at the moment…
Now all we need is some warm spring air…
you guys should see how cold it gets here in Berkeley. It must have
been 50 degrees last night BBRRRRRRRR
LOL – yeah, I remember those frigidly cold Santa Monica nights… with the night blooming jasmine, the beach, the beautiful women everywhere…
*Shakes WN*
Wake up man! You’re dreaming again!
Just remembering, aiki, just remembering…
The Dakota (people and language) are just a larger part of what most people call “Sioux.”
/nitpickytroll
just LOL??
No. Sorry.
Native Amaryans????
Native Canaries?
Plaintiff Mockeries?
Amaryan Indians
you’re marrying indians? :O
Sluggo, you a guitar player by any chance?
And no, although I did marry a Korean once.
Unfortunately, there were no teepes available at that time.
*adds ‘e’*
Perhaps I should’ve hyphenated: “Am-aryan”
Some guitar, some drums….no not the animal hide kind.
I dated a Korean gal for a while.
I once knew a Sluggo on a guitarist-oriented website (ION) – thought you might be him…
Must’ve been a different Sluggo…we’re nationwide, don’tcha know?
Yep – there is, indeed, a Sluggo proliferation at all levels.
Amaryan and Aginger
Up in a tree
K – I – S – S – I …
wait a minute, this is a family forum! Where’s the Skipper??
So, where’s Ginger and Maryanne?
I think they went to Boston.
Good thing, because between the innuendo machine, Spanish porn and belltowers, this ceased being a family forum a long, long time ago.
Please come to Boston
She said no, would you come here with me.
In that case, Maryanne and Ginger can go at it.
*grabs bucket of popcorn and a front-row seat*
double joints?
me smokem peace joint
Seriously, have you even thought about seeing an optician and wiping your face once in a while?
He’s too busy smoking peace pipes, I’m afraid.
You mean that’s not a beard?
*facepalm*
What’s up WN? Slow day in here…
Yeah, disturbing… where are they?
Ah well, at least it’s Friday
Anyone else got a four day weekend?
nods
*Shakes DB*
Wake up!
*Gives cup o’ joe*
*perks!*
Oh, nice..tyvm! zzzzZZZZzzzzz
*nods*
You’re making me jealous Hammy.
Everybody here has. Except myself. Damn deadlines!
I have deadlines too but as a result of being a Catholic when damn well suits me, I’m going on a four day bender, urm, I mean “Celebrating the resurrection of our lord”
As I recall, He did a bit of drinking and celebrating Himself
Water into wine, baby! WOoo!
Nowadays it would have to be nuclear waste into water I’d say.
Al Qaida jihadists into Barbie dolls might be fun
Grumblegrumbledamnblogmonstergrumble. I was suggesting gay-haters into homosexuals and nazis into black jews. In case this shows up twice ignore one of the comments. If it doesn’t show up, I can say whatever I like and nobody will ever know. Hmmm… I got nothing.
*hands Arthur a margarita*
That’s your answer to everyt… Hmmm. It IS the answer to everything. Thanks!
*sips*
To hungover to contribute
uuugh
*hands Daisy some hair of the dog*
*hands Daisy the rest of the dog*
I think he needs to go out.
*hands Daisy scooper and plastic bag*
*throws up in plastic bag*
Thanks
That bad, huh?
*hands Daisy a glass of water and some Aleve*
Outside of a dog, a book is mans best friend.
Inside of a dog, it is too dark to read.
I forget who said that, but it’s a favorite of mine!
Groucho Marx, if I’m not mistaken.
Yep
That sounds right.
“time flies like an arrow…
…straight into the heart of some guy on a wagon, who slumps over as his wife of only three weeks screams and screams…
Oh… my god… What have I done?!!
And the days go on…..
… while their now never-to-be-born children fade slowly in her mind…
…fruit flies like a banana.
Yay! I like that conclusion much better. It doesn’t involve my indirect murder of anyone.
Who is that supposed to be, anyway?
And what is that red thing next to him?
It’s Sven Hawkeye!
Last of the Norwegians!
At first glance I thought that said “Steven Hawking”…
Hey, that’s an awesome idea! Steven Hawking action figures!
*runs to patent office*
DOH *substitutes “ph” for “v”*
I WANT ONE I WANT ONE!!!
Can I have one with him on a Harley?
after many years of careful thought and consideration it is clear to me that the harley is the center of the universe
Rats. The computerized sounding voice affect doesn’t really come through in test…
With bendable joints?
*straightens*
*sign, sign, pass*
All the better to roll with.
*Articulates*
*Sign, sign, pass*
*gesticulates*
*sigh, sigh, passes out*
*replicates*
*one, two, three, fans out*
*Reanimates*
*Shock, shock, blast*
*Depilates*
*wax, wax, shave*
*exfoliates*
scrub, scrub, scurf*
*matriculates*
*study, study, passes “Sarcasm 101″…barely*
*Circulates*
*Pass, pass, stir*
*precipitates*
*rain, rain, rainbow*
Second
failure
Lol
What’s the writing in the top right? I think it says…warning, invasion hazard.
I believe that’s “Warning – Invasion Lizard” actually.
Or maybe, “Warning – Eddie Izzard”…
I’m pretty sure it’s “Warning – Invaded Gizzard risk”.
They didn’t inspect the toys for nematodes.
I accidenty the whole toy.
What should I do?
No, it’s. . . warning, manifest destiny can be hazardous to your constitution.
.
Good morning DB.
Good morning Marius,
.
Thank you…I just learnt something. Also, thanks for getting the very old reference up there ^. I tried a few days ago with no bites!
.
Perhaps it says…warning, a person’s mind stretched by a new idea can never go back to its original dimensions.
Hee!
.
My mind was stretched at an early age. Unfortunately it is badly warped and the echoes are very distracting.
.
Warning, articles left behind are not the responsibility of the state.
you’d think he would be more red in the face, huh?
I hope that’s just a tasteless attempt at humor…
Any update on the rectum problems?
I think I have discovered the source of Kittehs rectal problem.
*Clicky*
OMG
Who woulda thought?!?
The more you know. . .
So…Native Americans were white and come from space? AWESOME!
Where’s the fail? Where the action figure points his gun on the horse carriage drawing?
How does he have an automatic shotgun in the old west ?
The owls are not what they seem.
The dowels are part of a dream.
The towels are used after the stream.
Their growls can make people scream.
Her howls can make mortals cream.
The vowels e & a are used in `steam´.
Some scowl, it is better to beam.
With trowels, you can’t catch bream.
In a cowl, I can wrap up this theme.
Wow thats like … a huge FAIL!
Well, actually it’s a pump shotgun, far as I can tell. Not automatic.
But you never know about Space Indians – it could be a cleverly disguised lazer weapon of some type.
dont think so… you should never disguise laser weapons – it will make them back fire
It’s a crutch, not a gun.
*stumbles*
A pump-action crutch, no less!
Shop smart, shop Tiny Tim Mart!
Is this a promotional item from a Back to the Future we don’t know about? I like the added mini-totem pole for effect….nice.
Hi I’m new to Failblog.
*extends hand*
I think I was playing cowboys and Indians all wrong as a child.
Welcome!
*Shakes hand*
Why? Did you keep moving them east?
No, the Indians fought with bows and arrows and the cowboys fought with guns and smallpox. If the Indians had spacesuits and pump shotguns they would have fared better I think.
Perhaps, but we’d still have Chuck Norris on our side.
Welcome to the FAIL, Starfish
Good point, forgot about the Chuck Norris factor.
Thanks WhoaNellie
Always dangerous to forget Chuck.
Don’t forget the booze! Cowboys fought with booze too. Most Native Americans were/are allergic to alcohol. Not that that stopped/stops them.
For the record that’s allergic in a relatively non-lethal way. At least not immediately.
I’m allergic to booze too. In a way that makes me think I’m smarter, better looking and that peeing in public is acceptable.
And boarding schools! Cowboys fought with boarding schools out east, forcing young Native Americans to wear western clothing, speak English and act like “civilised” white folk.
…Sorry…my eyes are rolling too much to continue the straight-faced delivery.
Are you okay Dragon?
You have a paleface.
I accidenty my *FOOOOM!!* and now have firewater.
You could say that we’re all allergic to it in a way. Same for McDonald’s. Actually I’d rather like a Big Mac meal and 8 McNuggets right about now.
I hate McDonalds with all my heart.
Everyone’s heart hates McDonald’s.
I got fired from McDonalds in high school.
My heart hearts Triple Whoppers With Cheese.
Them and only them.
I prefer the whopper with cheese. The triple is too much.
Ummm not really. Some people really are allergic to alcohol, in a way that puts them at considerably more risk than the average drinker. They get hit harder and faster than the rest of us (no, they’re not just lightweights) and their risk of alcohol poisoning is very high.
That allergy is very common among Asians as well. I suppose that is why Native Americans have the same allergy as they share a common ancestry.
Exactly! A guy I used to date is allergic to alcohol (he’s asian), that’s how I came to know about it.
I hereby officially offer to take all that evil allergen off their hands. Especially the higher end tequila. Extra points for Lagavulin Scotch.
Hi Starfish! *waves*
What, you didn’t know Flash Gordon was a Cherokee Chief?
His tribal name was Dances with Ming.
So…when are you going pro??
Hmm. . .he could make his own ad.
LOL
*enjoys Schoolhouse Rock flashback*
Conjunction junction, what’s your function…?
Hooking up words and phrases and clauses!
So this is how General Custer lost at the Battle of Little Bighorn!
Essentially, yes.
That and the lack of helicopters.
Funny how history books don’t tell us about THIS part!
They seem to conveniently forget many things.
When George Washington crossed the Delaware, he had a fat general with him (I forget the name). When he told him to get in the boat he told him “Shift your ass *insert name of the fatass here*, but do it slowly or you’ll swamp the damned boat.”
Little did Custer know that the Indians had defectors from the future.
Look around online you’ll find out more about this.
This statement, or demand, applies to ANYTHING, you know.
Does anybody find the very first comment as ironically amusing as I do?
I do believe that’s how it was intended.
Well, I’m rather quite sure of it.
Thank you, Ted…I wasn’t sure if anyone noticed.
I did. I just got here too late to comment on it.
*SQUEEZE*
Good to see you DW
*hands SD the peace pipe*
Whoa Nellie, that’s some good sh*t!!
Hello guys! I smell something…
*hopefull*
*puffs the peace pipe*
…so then I said, seriously officer, it’s for tobacco use only…
*passes to AE*
*puff, puff*
Whoa.
*passes out*
Geez…this is what happens when I leave for a few hours!
*looks left….looks right*
*puffs*
Woooooooo…!
Come on, what do you expect for two bucks!?
I wouldn’t want a native american, that’s for sure.
My first serious GF (at 17) was 1/4 Cherokee and various other Indian percentages.
OMG
Long dark hair, simply gorgeous.
…sighs…
I once had a girlfriend who was half African (black francophone), half German – and the German side was half jewish. Every nazi’s nightmare…
LOL!!
booooo! it’s the cowboy dude in the wagon. post fail.
’cause, you know, cowboys rode in covered wagons (fail) and carried giant silver guns (fail again).
Too bad you can tell someone has opened the package.
Lame.
OH man, I’ve come across those at Toy Joy in Austin. I’m not sure if it’s done on purpose but I’m pretty sure the store sells them for the hilarity.
I’m in Austin right now, but I’m guessing it’s a different one.
Willdog, I have tried and tried to reply to your comment on the zombie fail and it won’t work, so I’m posting it here: Nazi Zombies FTW! Willdog, you should be my friend on xbox! Gamertag is CrinklySlinky.
My gamertag is WILLDOGWD.
LOL, thats jsut too freakin funny dude!
RT
http://www.web-privacy.us.tc
wow totally dude and a web privacy website based in the Turks and Caicos islands? totally trustworth dude!
cmon everyone lets click the link! I DARE YOU
^*y*^
Hmmmm…
*click*
*waits*
*click* *click* *click*
So, what’s the big deal? It didn’t do anythin48%%Y5V##E1969: ABORT $*^^
GENERAL FAILURE READING DRIVE C:
General protection fault, rebooting
Uh oh. Who is “General Failure”, and why is he reading my hard drive?
amealien
This is a Native American? I need to start brushing up on my American History.
Or try to see if there is a Soul-Wheel.
Costuming is the job of who buys it you girlz!
Wtf?
Confused win.
Philosophy of marketing team:
If he was born in America, he’s native.
Lmao I bet they wish they had guns like that… They wouldv’e owned us when we tried to take their land lol
spelling fail
Starting a sentence with a capital letter fail. Full stop fail.
Anal grammar fail.
Anal grammar win, surely. Recognizing a win, in comparison to a fail fail.
I have that totem pole….
Please, Please, Please for the love of all that is holy, tell me im not the only on that realises that that action figure isnt even in plastic wrap and was just a case of someone desperate for attention on the interwebs <_<
The trouble is, even if opened, it’s /still/ in the bubble it came in, otherwise it wouldn’t fit that well. And the bubble has spots for both the shotgun and the totem pole. And as someone else noted, they’ve seen them sold in the cheap grocery store toy aisles. Sad to say, but as stupid as some people tend to be, I believe it. :p
I think it’s pretty obvious the package has been opened.
He’s a native american it says so on his ships computer!
Unlicensed Fallout merchandise win!
We are the Indians. Resistance is futile.
Those silly Native Americans with their blue suits and shot gun, and weird red thing.
Nice post. It’s helpful. I will be back for more.
Sincerely,Alain Power
Job offers Canada
Ha. I have that spaceman-indian-guy!
Ninjas>Chuck Norris>everyone else
American Indian, Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.
wow i was going to post this picture taken by me but didn’t and it is at Toy Joy here in Austin, TX. cool!
He looks the main character from fallout. WTF?
Do I spy a sly Fall out 3 referance? that is totally vault boy.
Gotta love the dollar stores in America. There is nothing like this in Australia. We only get Hello Kitty vibrators in the children’s section.
Really
Is it just me, or does that guy look like pip-boy from the fallout series?
oh man, I see this stuf all the time, china is worst for it, I gotta get a pic of this Indian American War Weapons toy I saw at dollar store, it came in 2 versions, one was a tomahawk, the other a peace pipe! I pointed it out to the owner, since like 85 percent of the people in our area are native, and thought he’d do well not to upset the “natives”. Its still for sale, along with the Lead coated native kids jewelry, and the metal hooped dream catchers, those of us that weave them love seeing those…,,
Hi, I live in a state where the football team is the Redskins…you wanna talk offensive? All of my malls in the area have whole stores dedicated to annoying our peoples.
Why’d u think Area 51 is closed, maybe some high-techs indians or something =D
These are at toy joy in austin tx, haha, got one myself, they were like $2
Okay, firstly, I’m almost full blood and I am whiter than that action figure. Secondly, WTF is a totem pole doing with a plains indian on the front. This toy maker got all kinds of stuff wrong.
This is a classic!
I saw this one Jay leno
haha i saw this on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno awhile back. He had a whole bunch of screwed up toys from a dollar store
rofl nice!
This blog is awesome!!!!
…In the year 3098, Indians decide they want their land back.