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Well, you can’t sumo wrestle in the wash can you?
I like to do my wrestling over a bed.
You misread Moomin as Mookie again didn’t you?
In fact she already knows of my sumo related hobbies. I was just looking for a referee.
As long as you don’t mind Mookie winning everytime.
She already does.
By ‘referee’, do you mean ’someone with a videocamera’?
I was meaning someone who call for a time out if one of the participants is in serious trouble and his life is at risk.
“His” life is at risk? Oohwhatagiveaway!
in all fairness, he did mention she wins all the time anyways.
You are indeed at risk for a life sentence.
i would use a night vision camera while sitting in the the chair in the corner using a blanket for cover. *pay no mind to the ref under the blanket*
Why do you need a night vision camera when the lights are on?
Does anyone know who one the “Tell us of your Epic Money Fails in the comments and you could win a Kindle 2″ contest?
*won* not one
Will I get any benefits for good behavior?
Check your email, there is a complete description of the health plan.
They look excellent! I relinquish the right to having a fair trial. I have other “uses” for my attorney.
That statement has the ring of truth.
Perhaps you can engineer a solution to certain other practical difficulties.
Your words ring a bell, but I cannot manage to put my finger on it. I am glad you are less elusive, my love.
Perhaps it will come to you while you are sleeping. Don’t be surprised if you wake up a changed man.
I think you spelled “chained” wrong.
Oops, my bad! La teclada parece resbaladiza, por alguna razón.
De todos modos, anillo o cadena, puedes decidir, amado.
Te elijo a ti, cariño. Deja que chupe tus dedos, quiero ayudar con el problema de las teclas resbaladizas.
Ya me tienes, por lo mucho tiempo que quieras, y con cualquier etiqueta que me des.
This thread makes my brain feel so… violated
Yes We CAN!
Prove it.
I’m too skinny
Being fat enough Fail!
May I recommend the take away restaurant two fails down.
He will soon be fatt enough.
He has be careful not to confuse the restaurants, or else he’ll be hung far low. Or halfway inn.
Like the Soon Fatt Chinese Take Away Restaurant?
I bet they sell this item in that resturant.
I’m sure some American can help though
/s
Because Americans are all about sumo wrestling?
Aren’t they?
Now I’m confused…
You should prolly change your name, then…
I’m lost.
You too.
to what though?
I’m sure you’ll figure it out
I’m not so sure.
But he might.
You can, however, sumo wrestle in the pool.
Lol, that reminds me of that washing instructions that told ppl to give the cloaths to their wife!
Exactly!
Is that like Precise Lee, the over-emotional douchebag $30k/yr millionaire dude?
I think this has become my favourite fail. I just noticed the crossed out sumo guy.
Could be someone taking a shit in the woods.
No bears? No Popes?
Does the Pope shit in the woods?
or do the woods shit on the pope…
I think Popes are allowed to shit on bears. I really do.
But we don’t recommend it.
When have Popes listened to our recommendations?
Never. It pisses me off. I really thought the last guy would love my death metal.
Don’t like the sound of shitting on bears. Anyway, the pope doesn’t need to shit in the woods; he has a balcony.
‘Morning, Teddy. I like the new full-body avatar you’re sporting today. Been working out?
if the pope shits in the woods, and no one’s around to see it, is it still a Holy Shit?
If white smoke is coming out of it, then yes, it is.
Habemus turd!
LOSFLMJGC
Oh, man.
holy smoke
I like the “for kings” crown.
It looks like the clothes have received a text message too.
“you’ve got fail!”
HA!
if this was a video this comment would have win the “stupid comment at the end” award
I think that’s more a win, at least now Sumo Wrestlers get washing instructions
Agreed… this is not a fail, this is a WIN!
Photosho… *yawns*
Nah, I really don’t think so. After all, whoever PS’d this obviously had a pretty good grasp of French. The question remains, what do we think this garment actually is? Dinner jacket? Posing pouch? Wedding dress? Suspender belt?
Tutu?
Desmond?
It’s an acceptable result. Could be better though.
What? All the best people get Desmonds. Honest.
*walks away in shame*
*whistles*
*runs back*
Hello?
*runs off again*
*jumps up and down waving arms*
Don’t go!
*sneaks around*
*Surprise squeeze*
Hello again, fancy meeting you here.
Do you come here often?
Not in this thread but I think I might in the next one.
*shakes head smiling*
I’m glad you happened upon failblog.
You can blame one of my student teacher friends for that.
She posted up a FB picture on FB’k. Funnily enough it was a maths related one.
I’ll have to send them a giftwrapped potato in thanks.
I have no idea how I ended up here!
Well, I’m pleased I can cheer someone up.
You’re just cool like that.
You’re a popular lass, you make a lot of us smile here.
Thankyou!
Shucks…
You sweet talker you!
*squeeze*
*peck on cheek*
*squeeze*
Im going to go for the longshot and say it is a sumo wrestling costume.
Hey, SK! How are you and how’s your family? Alive, I hope?
NOOOOOOOO!!!!! do not use for sumo wrestling!!!!
I’m going for the longer shot and say it’s a large pair of underwear.
I’m going for the money shot and say it’s a small and semitransparent pantie.
It’s probably a velcro brace.
It’s a motorcycle jacket.
It’s not a photoshop. A friend of mine took this picture after she found the tag on a friend’s motorcycle jacket. This is a real photo, try again.
Apples
& pears
-stares-
*glares*
*flares*
Dares!
Hairs! Damn! I thought I had got them all.
*cares*…
*bares*
Oops!
*swears* Nice pussy (cat).
Nice pair.
Nair-s. I’m not telling you what though.
bears
*toot, toot*
*Fred Astaires*
Lionel Blairs
… No, just apples.
Chocolate Eclairs
*blares*
BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
some sweet, young mares.
Declares!
I learned this one the hard way.
ha!
…va nagila, hava nagila
Hava nagila venis’mecha.
have a vagina? That’s all I’m getting from that.
Hebrew folk songs can cause vagina?
Damn, no wonder everyone is a womanizer.
Speaking of which, does everyone have a Google-sponsored ad for finding lesbian singles in your area at the bottom of this page?
No, I have a chance to win a trip to Quebec, but the woman in the ad look like lesbians. Does that count?
*replaces woman with women*
You get TWO lesbian singles on your free trip to Quebec? They just say I should feel free to email the ones here.
Yea, but lesbians are the last thing I want on my free trip to Quebec. Wrong neighborhood lol
I know, me too. I was wondering if Google was being random or
knew something I didn’t…
You won a squeeze!
*squeeze*
Hello! How was your weekend?
*SQUEEZE* Hey Mooin!
My weekend was nice and relaxing. Bought all new fish for my tanks and worked on getting my veggie garden ready. How was your weekend Moomin?
Saturday was excellent, spent a large chunk of it chasing a friend’s child around being a monster. Sunday seemed to have slipped by. Relaxing though, thankyou. What kinda fish you got? A lad at work has a shark I occasionally look after.
I bought a new male Beta for one tank, moved the female Beta to another tank, and bought a bunch of fish called Mollies for the big tank.
Beta? Does that mean they’re only the trial version of the fish
Just looked them up, some of the Betas look well cool. Mollies are similar to goldfish?
I love the fins on the male Betas. I had one for 2.5 years and he just died the other day. I told everyone he was sleeping and he’ll eat when he’s ready. I replaced him and pretended like nothing ever happened.
Yes, Mollies are like goldfish.
You can also breed the Betas to mix colors.
Awwww, I’m sorry to hear that. But, hahaha, has anyone twigged onto what you’ve done?
Can you tell which parts will end up which colours (Such as a dominant fin colour), or does it just mix randomly? That would be cool.
I think it just randomly mixes. The one I originally had was dark blue with hints of red in his fins. The one I have now is red with light blue on his fins where they attach to the body, and a big orange spot on his head.
No…just those two cartoon imvu people making out. And a zwinky.
Ad blocker FTW!
Now it’s eRepublik.
$10 says that label belongs to a tuxedo.
Nylons maybe?
Inflatable sumo suit.
Hehe! I once was at a christmas party where we could wrestle in inflatable sumo suits. Looked funny!
I see. Red inflatable sumo suits.
So that was your excuse for jumping over Santa and dragging him across the floor. Good luck with that in front of the jury.
He asked for it! Did you see what he was wearing?
Look Arthur Eld, I’ve talked to you about these lame defences before. This is as bad as the one about the racoon asking for it. *sigh*
Hmmm, how about: He was wearing red clothes and was spreading the gifts. So he clearly is a communist. That’s why I had to beat him up in defence of freedom, liberty and all that. And waterboarding him afterwards was necessary to get the names of his little helpers and the reindeer.
Better, keep working on it though.
Bra? I think sumo rules forbids those.
Yeah, but why? Those guys need them.
No, they need a manzear.
Su-bro wrestlers?
It’s on a motorcycle jacket (true story).
Who took a photo of my Judo undies?
1ST MY DICK IS HUGE
And what is your second point?
He only has one point, and that is his ‘dick’
One hecka point tho
He misspelled ‘tiny and not functioning properly’ though.
You trying to say something?
No, he is typing.
Oh, Phew.
-Wipes sweat off forehead-
That’s not sweat. I told you to take a shower after you pulled your head out of your anus.
Crap. Literally.
At least it’s not waterproof!
I dont get it (?)
Why am I not surprised?
Cuz you arent suprised easily.
Damn british crap
It’s that tiny little thing he believes is his head. No, the tinier one . . .
I believe this is a tag on a wedding dress purchased at Wal-Mart. Hey, it’s my belief system, it’s not for you to question.
*questions anyway*
The icon makes it.
No Bleach? What about One Piece?
duh, sumo wrestlers don’t have white undies.
This tag is on Naruto’s orange one piece – coincindence?
-c. Bukkit. Bukkit all to hell.
And mass slaughterence to all.
Aaargh. I’m gong to sleep – that wasn’t a misspelling, but me so sleepy I thought it was…
Good night CWR!
Good night Arthur Eld’s mom!!
Uhh… Say what ?!
what
Come out of yourself, already.
You want me to cum?
Someone got a confession?
*Facepalms*
You’ve ah, already confessed in a way – stop pretending you’re not a closet troll.
It was, you just bukketed the wrong letter. Here, let me retrieve that c for you and chuck out that extra n! *+c, -n*
Thank you kindly, but *splortch* blaarghh – marshmallows and vinegar! I still had to dunk my head.
For those who understand french, it’s even funnier, beacause there could be a translation fail.
It says in french:
Do not use while practicing ’sumo’
maybe sumo is something in french.
it means, “to fat man wrestle”
lol, you fail at translating. XD
Because in French, that means “Don’t wear for the wrestling sumo” which doesn’t mean anything at all. XD
yes, it’s a double fail. It says do not wear for the fighting sumo. WTF?
Yep. The french is off allright. “Do not wear for the wrestling sumo.”
You can’t just show this and not say what the item is!
Watch me.
Fine!……*watches*
you’re such a goomba!
sorry if this is racist… but how do you type with no arms?
Speech to text program silly.
damn, technology is so advanced.
What’s your wpm on text to speech?
You got it finished! Congratulations!)
(60 wpm with two mistakes. I spy a new button
That’s not racist, but it is typecasting.
Dude, I don’t know how to cast a spell while typing. Harry potter left that one out.
Its hubbayergababa
An inflatable sumo suit is my bet.
Maybe it’s a sumo wrestler costume?
Should your wife do the sumo wrestling then?
I didnt put jam in my peanut butter sammich.
I told you I was an acquired taste!
I didn’t put peanut butter in any sandwich. Ever!
you haven’t lived.
What is it I do all day then?
Someone lied to me.
Well, okay, maybe you live… buuuut… you need to eat peanutbutter k?
I’m going to bed… when I get back… you better have completed the mission.
I choose not to accept it. It’s a mission impossible because I don’t have any.
The only mission impossible here is getting your IQ above 45.
Still, it’s nine times the size of yours so I’m not worried.
jam, no matter how high yours is, you still can’t multiply by zero^.
When Closet chooses to, he can actually manage a sentence so I thought I’d give him some credit.
It’s part of my ‘be kind to all’ philosophy.
Did you hear anything? I think there was a mouse squeaking or something.
Damn mouses.
So annoying these seasons.
I heard the Closet door squeaking; the wind must be up today. I always knew he was talking out of his arse.
Closets have asses?
Obviously they do because you’re still squeaking.
*Squeaks*
I’ll tell mr. cuddles to fix that problem.
He can trade that squeak for a squeeze.
I thought he could, umm, oil what is squeaking…
Its when you squeak.
Think about the situation:
When your mom gets my insertion in her vagina,
And she has a period the same time,
Its squeaking.
When did good humour become fail?
Yesterday. Didn’t you get the memo?
I sent him a memo.
My technicians told me I received one. But I didn’t.
Le Sumo Luttant!
Tout a fait!
Merde!
In your face!
yesh, yesh, i do prefer ironing instead of wrestling for my coat
I like the little picture telling not to wear it like a sumo wrestler
I have to take a realy big dump.
cya guys <333 xoxo
First, this is a win.
Second, the french translation is very funny. =)
You could add a Translation Fail to this one !
Er… why? Do not wear for sumo struggling? Can mean wrestling, too.
This is nothing short of Win Win Win
And what if you are a sumo wrestler?
You just did all the right preparations to wear this for your first day in sumo
wrestling class, But then comes this tag….
Pure FAIL.
Am I seeing things, or did I just see an intelligent comment by Closet?
Depends,
The guys down the mental institution told you its all O.K. now?
They don’t know I’m here. Don’t tell them where I am.
Well, if you have 1.000 chimps typing on 1.000 typewriters for 1.000 years one of them will eventually write a poem. That doesn’t mean anything really.
Whoa, are you from one of those place that uses periods instead of commas in numbers.
Nope. It’s supposed to be one thousand, not one point zerozerozero (Although that of course is a matter of opinion). The period is meant to be reader-friendly.
The period is not breeder friendly.
But 14 days past period is.
HA! Sometimes, Closet, I think you’re not such a buffoon. Please, keep it up!
That’s what I meant, I just learned in my Spanish class the other day that instead of writing 1,000, they write 1.000 and instead of writing $1.50, they write $1,50.
So does France and a number of other European countries.
Uh oh. Looks like I owe Lou a lot more money than I thought.
Causes all sorts of trouble on spreadsheets!
I think I heard the same thing discussing with your mom about
you and your brothers last night.
Oh good, we found a little maturity in Closet finally.
Oh, wait…that’s not what that is.
You didnt find maturity in your closet?
Psht, You dunno where to search eh?
What is S.T.D. Guys?
Who is Denis Rodman?
Did Chuck Norris create the universe?
Closet?
Is that the thing you came out of?
Ive heard that joke before.
but apparently you haven’t heard of a apostrophe
“-”
And then you go post a thread like this. Guess I posted that last comment too soon. ^
Closet, your aggressive style is not funny nor interesting, stop being an idiot.
Sheesh give me a break,
Im just trying to get one or two good laughs -.-
How’s that working for you?
Im getting laughs from saying what comeback comments I get.
Seeing* >.>
Isn’t it fun?
Oies luk itz king trull.
ron 4 yer livaz!!!
What???
Spell Check is going off the roof!
Oh crap this isnt lolcat section?
Sorry my bad
Closet, what the f*ck is it with you and leaving out apostrophes? And there is no lolcat section…ever.
It’s like me, just an illusion.
There some things mr. cuddles won’t hug!
And now there’s another one!
His name happens to be ‘wolfgangmunzerl2′ ?
apostrophe win.
Seeing as I don’t want a hug from a grown man calling himself mr. cuddles…
Grown man?
Thats some pretty words for 39 years old pedo going there.
Awwwwwwwwwww, you prefer squeezes from the moomin don’t you? Eh? Don’t you? Awwwwwwwww, come here.
*squeeze*
Are you all happier now?
See here Closet, if you don’t know how to use an apostrophe,
you’ll have to see Miss Flamiel…
and Yakko, Wakko, and Dot won’t be there!
It is, isn’t it? It’s a shame that’s all you see yourself as Closet.
Closet > 39 years old guy with hair issues calling himself Mr. Cuddles.
1>2
Oh, in that case…
mr. cuddles > x’s ∞ Closet
23 year old mr. cuddles > Closet > 39 years old guy with hair issues calling himself Mr. Cuddles.
Oh, I see. Being 23 doesn’t make it gay at all.
Dude, I am gay.
OMG
TOTAL FAIL
./SCREENSHOT
Gay and proud isn’t that right mr. cuddles? Hell, I’m even proud of you!
Religious Extremist?
Damn skippy Jam. For 9 years now!
I love Stewie but I don’t understand why he sounds English.
Wait. You can accept an American infant who develops death rays, weather control machines, takes part in various commando raids and speaks, but an English accent is over the line?
Then at least try to be funny.
Sure hunn
That’s obviously neither his ambition nor has he the ability to. He wants attention to confirm that he does exist. I guess he is a poor, lonely, unpopular loser who thinks that negative attention is better than no attention (which is what he usually gets apart from being laughed at). He knows that he is unable to get what he wants if he tries his best like the rest of us do – there’s not enough humour, wit and intelligence in him. Therefore he’s just insulting and… well, trolling. But obviously he isn’t good at it. Not even that! Sad.
-O-
That was actually kind of insulting.
Thus proving Arthur Eld even more.
While King Troll on the other hand…
…is just as bad, if not worse.
…Coming for a dude naming himself ‘Mr. Cuddles’…
From*
Oh wow, same point at the same time. ^
Indeed.
If ‘Mr. Cuddles’ is less then 40 years old, Call me shoe.
Can I beat you with a shoe instead?
Atleast you dont deny.
Deny what? Clearly you don’t know what the f*ck you just typed. If I’m younger than 40, call you shoe. Instead of calling you shoe, I’d rather beat you with one and then shove it up your ass.
Ew look what you just did,
Im horny now.
You got msn messenger sexii?
We’ll continue convoing there.
How about we meet in person instead, so I can kick the shit out of you
mr. cuddles, I wouldn’t beat him up. He insulted me, my mom, you, other people but I still can’t feel any anger. He’s boring and below avarage and whatever he says – where’s the difference to a poodle barking?
I just divided by zero
12 x 0 = 25.26257781?
My calculator is broken again?
i thought you divided by zero
He doesn’t know what he’s talking about.
Oh, well in that case… carry on.
In that case?
What you get in the case?
Oh, it’s a big…
FALCON PUNCH!
The fastest way to get rid of trolls!
*inserts the other f*
*Runs for his life*
Now do us all a favor and don’t stop running, even if you see a cliff
Oh noez. A cliffffffffffffffffffffffff…
Sir Isaac Newton!
Your idea of gravity is proven!
I just saw a fat child fall to his death!
Now for that ‘King’. Just to make sure.
Im 43kg 1.71 meters.
-O-
Opened wide for my surprise?
Yeh, Anything / zero is 0.25
I can only imagine what article of clothing this is…
Malicite! I call upon thee to help the fight against Closet and his gay lover, King Troll!
I’m on board.
WIN! WIN! BEST INSTRUCTIONS EVARRR!
Is it just me or do you get redirected to MySpace?
The french translation is even more funnier. It says: Do not wear for the wrestling sumo.
i think this is a for a swimming tire.
don’t use it for ’sumo’ wrestling because you will get rugburn or it might even explode..?
the structure sure looks like it, and you cannot dry-clean a tire, nor use bleach on it. without ruining it. can you now?
Your scene of humor fails me everytime.
Sense*
stop picking on new people!
by the way hairy, welcome to FAIL Blog!
O MEE GOSH,
I just noticed a big fat kid with scene hair petting a dog.
My life is a lie.
hahahahahahhaha
that’s probably the funniest thing i’ve heard in a long time.
LOL dude thats the finniest thing I seen yet!
RT
http://www.anonymity.us.tc
LOL SO FUNNY
http://i41.tinypic.com/2uibuhf.jpg
Wow this was totally published in my myspace and sent to failblog.
Mr. Cuddles, Thank you for being such a failure.
No incomplete polygons allowed?
Failblog just becomes more and more disturbing every time I log on.
And I love the french translation fail too.
A little (true) side story to this tag: This was found on a friend of a friend’s motorcycle jacket. Apparently, motorcycles and sumo go hand in hand.
French translation D-D-D-Double Fail!
Retranslation to english:
“Do not wear for the sumo wrestling*”
*translated as continuous-tense conjugated verb, not noun.
In fact this is a double fail because the french translation of “do not wear for sumo wrestling” is wrong. It’s not “Ne portez pas pour le sumo luttant” which is a very very bad translation but “Ne pas porter pour la lutte sumo”.
There’s also a french fail… It’s saying something like ‘Do not wear for the fighting sumo’ XD
more like WIN.
Must have been the result of a really strange lawsuit…
I have ton say that the French below for the sumo wrestling is awful. it doesn’t mean anything! If I translate it back to English, it would become “do not use for the wrestling sumo” like if the sumo was currently fighting XD
I do not like it in the ring,
I do not like it with some zing,
I do not like sumo wrestling,
I will not do it with this thing
This is a rare bilingual fail, because the French translation of the last line is really screwed up as well.
I’ve just realised that WTF, it’s a doubled fail.
The translation of sumo wrestling in french is in the domain of epic failure
Anyone with half a brain would notice this is blatant humour. Probably one of those fashion brands aimed at the young crowd like Puma.
It’s probably a sweatshirt or jacket made from some artificial material by the reading of the instructions.
P.S., whoever thought this was an actual washing machine, and not instructions for washing the garment in a machine…. Need to start reading more.
Even the french translation is a FAIL
Definite and absolute WIN!
What is that thing?
wait….do they intend for me to sumo naked then?
A double fail if you can read french.
I can and the translation is good for a engrish/frengrish? lol
ha, it even says it in french at the bottom
“Ne portez pas pour le sumo luttant” xD
Does not mean nothing in French.. Should have been “Ne convient pas à la lutte sumo”.
If I try to translate back the French translation in English, it woult actually say “Do wear not for wrestling sumo” -__-
About french translation, its another translation fail : the translation does not mean anything in french : the two last words is a word for word translation.
-> its a very bad translation from a language tool (again !)
.
We’v so many of these on imported french clothes / packages and sometimes user guides etc… ! We appreciate sooo much
(I’am french
)
no…..WIN!
Fail? Win!
I say: Win.
Obviously its a joke or has something to do with the brand
first
What item of clothing is this from, I feel this is an important piece of information to dermine the precise level of fail.
“Ne portez pas pour le sumo luttant” Translation fail too XD
Words fail me!
#59