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Cheezburger Network Blog
Fore, baby!
For baby
More, baby.
whore baby
ore baby!
[I'm] sore, baby!
gore baby.
{it} tore baby!
core, chore, adore, four, ignore, pour, pore, roar, soar, store,
spore, snore, wore, war …
… and BOREd with clang associations for BABYs
oar baby.
(“I’m going to”) score baby!
door baby
*exit*
your baby?
(“Hit the”) floor baby.
four score and seven babies ago
Four scores and seven babies ago (3 sets of twins)
cat
>^..^<
actually, a score is 20, so 87 kids
43 sets of twins and 1 single baby ago
Hello my baby, hello my darlin, hello my rag time dooollll….
Okaaaaaaaaaaaay
99 problems and my baby ain’t one.
Hey abstract, I think you’re interpreting the word score there kinda stupid…
Think more abstractly.
4 scores, as in he scored 4 times, 3 times the woman had twins, once she had 1, making 7 babies. Think about what hes saying before you try to correct him.
And to think he’s not paying child support to 3 of those 4 women. The 4th is the golf club and we all know he can’t get enough of her.
pretty diagram me like. pretty pretty young thing
But… how is teh babby formed?
ignore these babies
re baby
hit me BABY one MORE time.
garbage baby hahahahaha
don’t make fun of it, cuz i’ve got like 12 in my garage
[hard] Core, baby.
Little hog.
Zorb, baby.
OH, Dilly will be so happy with you…
Yay! ‘Tis true. If only it were here…*lip trembles*
So sorry. I didn’t realize …
I’m coming into the fifth stage of grief, it’s ok.
so that’s how you get golf clap
XD Epic comment win for you, flogger!!!
win indeed.
This comment gets a *snorkity!*
Oh! Pour vous, Casey…(clickity)
Fore-skin?
eeeewwww!
This is from the show Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job…
how does nobody know this?
The euro club?
yeah, name fail: in France, people don’t bother to hide, they just pee in the middle of the street or on the side of a building, in broad day light. I’ve seen my share of pénis français…
So what? It’s only a penis. It’s like saying “I’ve seen my share of mains (hands) français.”
Only that some power-greedy bastards from some “religion” told you that this were a “bad” body part, to make you be ashamed of sex. Sex: The most natural and important thing you can do.
Not to mention the most fun thing you can do.
Sex? I thought we were on urination.
Urinecorrect.
Nah, mixing the two is where I draw the line, but that’s just me.
Takes good aim to do that.
I’d Do Anything for Love (But I Won’t Do That)
There’s a difference?
In some states now, public urination is considered a sexual offense. Try explaining that one to your neighbors!
we’re in the ballpark though
I was sure this invention was a viral joke, but it turns out its real! I found a couple other videos of this thing… http://www.scottblogs.com/golfing-gotta-pee-use-your-uroclub/
its a sex club…
*Perk*
Thank you! I agree completely with that sex part, however it might be hard for some people to overcum their coyness.
Hmmm, that was a very loaded comment…
in every sense of the word
Bassplaya must have been feeling spunky.
a very loaded cumment?
you all have cumpletely overcum yourselves with coyness
“Religion” in quotations?
because you doubt that they are actually religions?
use of quotation marks fail.
grammar nazi win.
HUGE ass difference between sex and pee. I don’t mind sex, I watch it nightly. But I do NOT want to see some old man pissing off the side of a balcony.
I don’t care about seeing anyone’s penis but they’re not exactly the prettiest thing to look at and I’d rather not have to sidestep your urine.
Hate to break it to you… but sex is different from peeing… ask your parents to explain
well we all know the religious dude wasnt French, french chicks are naked 30% of the time…and there is no french word for foreplay cuz french chicks are always turned on
i watched a guy take a crap in the middle of a parking lot in italy.
he was wearing a business suit and holding a briefcase… and he had shiny shoes.
classy.
its not for peeing ins for matsurbating
haha n00b it should be allowed to piss in any public place
uro-, as in urine.
No embarrassing moments!
Unless the guy forgets to empty it out.
.
:gross:
There needs to be an emoticon for “I think I’m gonna be sick”.
The only one I can find even close is
but I’d like a green faced one.
.
:sick: ?
:yuck: ?
.
Just trying a few ideas.
:green:
*shrugs*
Hmmm…
8-p
.
>=^p
:,(
I think this site is half html and half lolspeak. So a lot of the html codes don’t work.
Have you tried peeing in your monitor?
I did once. It was shocking.
Precisely why you don’t plug golf clubs in.
shouldn’t there be a golf club that allows you to relieve your urgent needs that come out from the back rather than the front too, then you can sll them as a set.
But this guy plugged into his golf club.
You owe me a new keyboard. I just spit soda all over mine.
Was that “soda”… yellow, and lukewarm?
Try the new UroMonitor!
“Your coworkers simply think you are cleaning your monitor! ”
*Picture of man in business wear, with monitor up to his crotch, carefully hidden by green flap*
I did once when I was trying to see my IPee address.
That iPhone app is really pointless.
But how’d you get in the monitor? O_o
Duh! Go watch TRON.
Nope. 8p or 8P maybe? Probably not.
:ugh:
:blah:
:bleurgh:
:ick:
:arghijustsawamanurinatingintoagolfclubandnowiwanttotearoutmyeyesandbesick:
I hope you’re proud of that you imbecile.
*SQUEEZE*
:squeeze:
:VOMIT:
:ill:
:ack:
:puke:
:chunder:
:yack:
:spew:
:barf:
:barf:
:blech:
:sick:
I’m just gonna keep looking.
:queasy:
:faint:
:nauseous:
:undertheweather:
:flu:
:eww:
Still looking.
It’s not here ☹ ⚡⚡
:multi-coloured burp:
:bazooka barf:
:hurl:
:worf:
:technicoloryawn:
interresting… really.
Let’s ask Dragon when she gets here, she may know.
(clickie)
:SQUEEZE:
.
Thanks!
Clickie!
You would need a combination of
& 
I’m still looking, I KNOW I’ve seen something that would work, I just can’t remember where! And the other sites that were linked to, were in German (I think).
:sealed:
I hope he doesn’t use that club.
Here’s all of them:
:.smile:
:.grin:
:.sad:
:.eek:
:.shock:
:.???:
:.cool:
:.mad:
:.razz:
:.neutral:
:.wink:
:.lol:
:.oops:
:.cry:
:.evil:
:.twisted:
:.roll:
:.!:
:.?:
:.idea:
:.arrow:
:.mrgreen:
Obviously remove the “.” for them to work, and YES the first half of them do have two other possible ways to be entered…but you get it.
Click on my name for the full list.
Well then just link them, I will have a closer look.
+o(
:-&
:¬x or X_X might work…
You mean…
like this?
Cross that with
and get rid of the smile part and yeah, that would work.
http://209.85.12.232/style_images/1/icon8.gif
I found one! GREEN FACE
+o( (not sure if this will work but its all i could find)
I would like to see a guy take a swing with that, who forgot to replace the cap.
The Golden Shower Club.
That’s not a club I would ever consider joining. No matter how much money being offered to me.
But, but, it’s golden and it’s a shower. How can that be wrong?
Do you really want to know?
Hehe, no explanation is required.
do they make one in a wood size?
From Man of Steel to Iron Man … it’s been a comical day.
*ponders the optional vibrating model for female golfers*
That probably wouldn’t be such a good idea… unless you had another use in mind.
*liking this*
Is this an example of thinking ‘outside’, ‘inside’ or just ‘of’ the box?
“Of”.
“Just”.
Ladies – do we have a consensus???
hehe wood
I have no speakers and therefore NO idea WTF is going on.
The guy has to pee. But instead of going in the woods, he can pee in this golf club instead.
… but it appears that he is just checking out his club.
keeping guys out of the woods…
as if…
It’s the XL fleshlight designed for Nigerian pickles.
It’s a hollow club. To relieve yourself into when there are no nearby toilets.
What happens for a #2?
I really, really DON’T want to know!
Really? You just aren’t the slightest bit curious?
Not even the slightest bit.
Two answers. You chose the one I wasn’t prepared for answering.
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
♪ Two hearts… beat as one… ♪
Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on
Once more you open the door
And you’re here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on
Is that, like, your signature song or something?
No, it’s just the first song that pops into my head when I hear the word “heart”.
Really? That must suck.
For me it’s always “Heartbreak Hotel.”
For me it’s “Barracuda”.
dug dugga dug dugga dug dugga dug dugga dug DAAAAAAAA
DA
Da
da
dug dugga dug dugga dug dugga dug…
Robert Frost loved anal sex so much he wrote a poem about it.
That’s what the club’s cover is for.
No no no! There are sand traps all over golf courses, they’re sunken or behind a mound for a reason! Why do you think the grass is soooo green! Fertilizer!
Chemicals. That’s why the grass is soooooo green.
Please rake when you’re done!
Thanks goodness I am a dog! Oh you might want to watch where you step.
Thank goodness I am a Skwerl!
*flicks tail and teases jules from a high limb*
Oh, you might want to watch who you’re under!
*runs up to tree and barks*
I’ll get you yet
*shakes paw*
*wanders by tree*
*looks askance at strangely loud dawg barking at strangely hatted skwerl*
*walks on by*
*pulls out .22″ long rifle, aims into tree*
Nooooo!!!
*pushes ethana2 aside, and bullet zooms into sky, hitting yesterday’s DRAGNOWRITER blimp*
*blimp goes down in flames*
That’s gotta hurt!
It’s a drag, no?
OH THE HUMANITY!!!
*sigh*
I had my very own, misspelled blimp, and now it’s gone.
*cries*
we will drag no writer before its time
::toasts a toasted blimp clear of cobwebs::
Sorry ethana2, but FailBlog is both a “Gun Free Zone” and an “Environmental Wacko Approved Skwerlly Animal Federal Protection Refuge.”
Your prison sentence will run concurrent with your life. Enjoy!
Yup. We’re all EWASAFPR’s.
You have to get the custom golf bag for that. Unfortunately, it’s much harder to do without anyone suspecting.
…unless you get the deluxe model with the wrap around curtain
I hope he screws the cap on tight, cuz it has to be put upside down in the golf bag.
Use a funnel.
that’s where the feco club comes in
ACT NOW! And get the FREE BALL WASHER Attachment at No Extra Charge!
Can I get it bundled with a ShamWow?
I don’t see why not.
Call now, and we’ll throw in a miniature ball waxer/shaver at virtually no additional charge!
its golf tee bag time
I also have no speakers, and I thought he was sticking his, um, pickle into the club and playing on. Like the pickle was supposed to give him better aim or something.
just like how the europeans do it!
*puts on anti – freaky hershey guy glasses*
I don’t see any basis for your statement.
All his basis are…
Never mind.
Be long (comes with towel).
you have no chance to survive make your tee time
Someone set us up the schlong.
At least you’d always be hoopy and know where your towel is.
Until Thursday, at least.
Ugh, just noticed it IS Thursday. I just can’t get the hang of this.
lol
European, I’m-a-peein’, everyone’s-a-peein’!
Capitalism is the only economic system that responds efficiently to the needs of society.
^ satisfied customer?
In Soviet Russia, hollow golf club pees into YOU!
You can guess it from the name….Uro Club.
*cough*UrinatingClub*cough* for the cueless.
“The Urinating Club for Men”
“Not only an I president of the Urinating Club for Men, I’m also a….”
*sob*
“Oh god, my life is so worthless! Someone beat me to death with a urine-filled five-iron, please!”
Can’t find it… will the Poo-filled Putter suffice?
dishonourable poo poo putter come with unfortunate cookie
IN BED?!
The Poo-Poo Putter is the next logical step.
AAGH! Killed by a squirrel with a poop-filled golf club!!
PEEK-A-POO!!! Uuucks!yoo nots dedTheGreatWhiteDope!Yoo juss stinkies!HA! HA! HAR! HAR! HAR! HAR!
*hoses down TheGreatWhiteDope*
Please, Boggy, the next time you do that do it in another room. The stench is unbearable!
Bloodhound fan?
Yum.
Can’t wait to get my own.
“Yum”
Gaaaah! What kinda sicko are you?
.
.
.
[if you're the right kind, maybe we should meet]
haha. the awesome kind… duhh.
wow, definitly fail right there. I can’t make it back to the club house, so I’ll pss in somthing that looks like a golf club. how about an empty water bottle.
no, you see, after you finish you can hand the uro club to your “buddy” and tell them it’s the new innovative water club to help with your swing.
Um… Why is it so warm Bob?
It’s been out in the heat so long. Now don’t you worry about its yellowness, that’s just..um…the colouring from the club’s interior!
DAMN!
Bob’s water club.}
*THINKS*
{I’m THIRSTY! I don’t have anything!
OH!
*sneakily takes club from Bob’s Bag*
Uhhh!
Guys! The Gator Aid in this club has gone bad it the sun!
Methinks you THINKS too much.
Or not enough… it’s really a toss-up.
Win. Win. Win.
You guys have obviously never been on a golf course before.
Fail. Fail. Fail.
You obviously have never had a dignity before.
*steals willdog’s ‘a’ and runs*
*starts chasing cuddles*
*stops and looks back at his previous post with confused look on his face*
What ‘a’?
The pointless one before ‘dignity’.
Oh come on, I liked that ‘a’. Give it back.
I guess I can give it back. But you have to catch me first!
*trips up cuddles and steals the ‘a’*
*hides it under his hat*
Fine, you can have it. I didn’t actually have a need for it.
Inserts ‘a’ back where it was.
I liked it that way too, will(dog).
Here take a one of mine =)
*sneaks up*
*steals the ‘a’*
*swaps willdog’s hat with a handful of leaves*
*scampers happily away*
Hmmm, nice hat!
Just so you know Skwerlly, I’m a bear and I can climb trees after you!
Let the skwerl hunt begin!
No… I didn’t know that! You LOOK like a sad lil’ puppy,
not ferocious at all!
Oooo, I am scared, *fake trembles*, do not cuddle me!
Aaaaaaah!
Don’t judge me!
You aren’t exactly the most intimidating person.
I know
I’d much rather *SQUEEZE* and *cuddle* anyway 
*chases tail*
*hides tail*
squirrels can be terrifying, I had one jump out of a tree and try to attack me once….now skwerlls, i don’t know about
They’re worse.
MUCH worse.
Plus, they have huge green friends…
WOOF! well hello there mr. cuddles the bear. how about you & i get to know each other a little better.
Oh, what f*** happened to my hat? It looks so different.
You didn’t let a golfer borrow it, did you?!?
I have no idea. One minute I’m wearing it, and the next minute it’s a pile of leaves.
Avis, The Pro Shop sells Golf Caps that are
made with removable scented liners,
(answering “what happens at #2 time?”).
*looks innocent… snickers… runs*
*lends willdog a “the”*
What, you no has a dignity? Thanks for helping keep lolspeak out of failblog, it is greatly appreciated.
I have a dignity (used to have more of them, but i traded them for gasoline…tough economic times and all) I can’t even read lolspeak let alone type it. crazy kids these days
Yes, but as Bondfan said, they are mostly 50 year old men and women. Work reaaaalll hard to picture that.
*remembers Jake’s old men in shower death trap*
I HAS A DIGNITY….Y u ask? i is in ur grammar skrewing wit it
It wasn’t a required course to get my degree, so why would I bother? Nothing but old dudes playing some sort of fancy sissy croquet-like game & they don’t allow dirt bikes.
thats a win in my book!
Is your book titled “the joys of public urinating”?
Well he is named “Ram Bonie.” Why one would want to ram one’s bone into a club is … unless … his book might beFight Club? Maybe there’s a 12-step for that particular struggle.
You just broke rules one AND two!
So wrong-really really wrong…..
But it feels so right…
…being with you here tonight…
*inserts ♪ ♪ in above post*
*inserts UroClub in above poster*
…and damn your ass is tight…
*hangs up Exit Only sign on back*
I have a tattoo back there that says “ALL WELCOME! NO CHARGE!”
Mine’s better: “Open For Business”
Much better anyway than “GTFO”
Not even free.
Not in MY Tree.
Not with THAT Bear!
NOT ANYWHERE!
I do not want him WhaoNellie,
I do not want mr. cuddles for free.
You don’t want that cuddles free?
You don’t want him in your tree?
Would you like him anywhere?
Or – to be clear – just not back there?
mr. cuddles has his friends
that allow him at their back ends,
but “Back there” is NOT for me,
or anyone else up in my tree.
Cuddling is great fun to do,
especially when gender count is 2.
“Hugging” men is as far as I will go
for I’m a MANLY Skwerl you know!
the more i get to know you. the more i like you!
Yeah because the cover makes it so much less obvious that you’re doing when the *ziiiip* sound fills the pristine air.
*what*
stupid 8am classes… mess me up all day.
Great now its ok for old men to piss in plain site at the golf course….
I wish I did not know this exists. I am going to see someone do this and be scared for life.
Take it easy they are just checking their clubs =)
* “clubs´´
scared or scarred? although i suppose either one is fitting… my initial response was “no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no …” …… you get the idea. and i then i had my greatest fear confirmed when i visited the website and realized it existed. yikes?
need to bulid a handy wipe dispenser into that club!! Yucky….
What if anybody find out, that i am pissing in the golf club??????
I mean the is the moment where the wiener have to be insert and remove.
whoaaa loook at the guy, hes trying to f**ck the holy golf club
Anyone know if babelfish can translate this for me?
Mr. cuddles, you sure are very critical of peoples gramar skills.
*throws up an ‘m’* What can I say, I hate bad grammar and punctuation.
*tosses up an apostrophe to go with the ‘m’*
I hate Kelsey Grammer
He’s not the only one!
*inserts apostrophe between l and s in “peoples”*
This blog is EXTREMELY critical of grammer, and don’t you forget it.
I can’t believe I missed the missing apostrophe! *swaps out ‘e’ for ‘a’ before anyone else notices*
It’s too late for that. his sentence is death by english class, to be carried out immediately.
*capitalizes ‘h’ and ‘e’*
Is “grammer” correct in UK? : P
Grammer crammer.
Ham, or graham with that?
Repeat my mantra – hammmm.
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
*runs away*
Sing huum to open your heart.
Immaculately true blue.
I see what you did there.
gaaaaaaahyatri mantram
My gramar and grampar don’t like bad grammar, either.
I bet grampar appreciates a bad gramar once in a while.
*cringes from the mental image that produces*
Skwerlly Bob
telled BOGGY“It be best if mr. cuddles & BOGGY not know what TheWatchman say.”
Come onmr. cuddles,let's go pway sumfin funs game!What would you like to play today BOGGY?
am dere anys Trolls are round?*picks up boulder and looks under it*
BOGGY nots finds any!
*stands stiff as a board*Wuts we cans does? BOGGY am board!
HA! HA! HAR! HAR! HAR! HAR!
Hahah! *SQUEEZE*
*giggles*
mr. cuddles,
Skwerlly sayed you not 'posed to pway in BOGGY shorts.
*wiggles*mr. cuddles
wunts to pway "PeeK-A-Poo"?COME HERE BOGGY! and take this;
“BOGGY the FailBOG Monster (owned by SB)”
and please quit messing things up!
OOP!mr. cuddles
wunts to pway "PeeK-A-Poo"?Don’t worry BOGGY, I’ll pretend I didn’t see anything!
pway "PeeK-A-Poo" is fun Fun Game!Yoo fines a baffroom wheres sumbody am be going Potty. Yoo sneeks up on the stall and BANGS on door reel lots hard.
BOGGY pokes him head over the wall and yell, "PEEK A POO!!!"AND din we RUNS!HA! HA! HAR! HAR! HAR! HAR!After you BOGGY. Where’s the nearest bathroom?
…and there have been reports of an increase in public toilet related deaths. Witnesses to these deaths confirmed a strange monster would creep up to the cubicles and shout something incomprehensible while jumping over the doors. Police are continuing their investigation.
HA! HA! HAR! HAR! HAR! HAR!PEEK-A-POO!!!!diss am funs game! peepulls makes a funnee face wen them heers BOGGY!
Comes onmr. cuddlesless fine anuther one!*bangs on stall door and yells PEEK A POO!* You’re right, this is fun!
*almost has heart attack*
Do you mind?!
*runs away really fast* hehehe!
*chases after mr. cuddles and Boggy*
I’ll get you!
*wonders why everyone is staring, then looks down*
Ah.
*pulls up pants*
*resumes running*
RUN BOGGY, RUN! We gained some ground while BFF was flashing all of the innocent bystanders.
*sprints towards mr. cuddles*
I’ll get you yet!
*falls into manhole*
AAAAAAAAAAaaahhh…
*helps BFF out of the manhole* You ok buddy?
HA! HA! HAR! HAR! HAR! HAR!Bond Frind falled down hoal!Falled in a big sewer hoal!
Uuucks! Now Bond frend smell likes POOO!
*picks up BFF and dunks him in a fountain a few times*
ALL CLEENS! Lettuce goes pway! Wheeeee!*BOGGY runs away toward next restroom facility*
Geesh.
Skwerl, ya gotta quit loaning BOGGY your keyboard like that.
He just TAKES it.
YOU WANNA TELL HIM “NO!” NEXT TIME?
Good point.
Nebber mind…
They should install a shit can in the caddy so you can discreetly take a dump with the illusion that you are checking your golf clubs….with your ass.
You’d have to take careful aim though…either that or a rather wide golf club. Take your pick.
It’s called the halfway house, USE IT!
No, it’s called the UroClub. And, no thanks; I prefer the bushes.
Oh, how incredibly sad. Just hop in the cart and drive to the club, granddad.
I’m thinking that if the urge to pee comes on THAT suddenly, maybe gramps should go visit his doctor.
I need an undo button, quick! I need to unsee what I thought I just saw.
We’re sorry, the button you have reached is not available at this time.
Missing button+desparate urge to urinate=not good.
Oh sorry, I forgot most guys do that standing up.
“Never do anything standing up …”
What?! You’re doing it wrong.
Post self-meatomy, there is only one form of doing it right.
You’ve watched it…YOU CAN’T UNWATCH IT!
After getting over the initial shock of the reality of this, I have a few questions.
1. When and where does one empty a golf club full of urine? I can imagine that would probably be worse than cleaning a litter box.
2. Is this a one-size-fits-all deal? I would hope then, that it is quite a bit wider than an average club to avoid anything getting stuck anywhere.
3. What is this non-porous material it is made out of? People are going to know what the hell is up when they hear tinkling in your golf club.
4. When will a female attachment be offered? Let’s not pretend only men play golf. What a sexist urologist.
I’m going to hold off on buying this until I get some answers.
Clickie.
I was kind of hoping for some actual information on the product.
I’m a little disappointed.
He just said he wanted answers.
What was I to do?
I was thinking something like this.
Clickie.
Um, yeah.
I wanted to know if it was an actual product or just a joke.
I don’t know which which I was hoping for.
Oh, it’s real.
http://uroclub.com/
5. Profit?
4. -> Just add the “shewee” and you are all set…not as discrete perhaps…
Thats the most fucked up product ever. I seriously cant believe that.
Nice one FailBlog!
I seriously can’t believe your abysmal lack of proper punctuation.
Remember, the apostrophe is your friend.
*shakes head and sends Dantes to the 6th level down*
Not harsh enough!
*pushes Dante into the 7th level*
There!
Sometimes. Except when you’re writing “its” and it comes up and stabs you in the back.
Extenuating circumstances, hammy, extenuating circumstances…
ummm ok. I seriously cant believe that you care so much about my punctuation. Dont worry about it
Oh my god, after so many warnings you still fail to use correct punctuation. AAAAAH!!!
*adds an apostrophe between the n and t in “dont” and “cant”*
Seriously, you’re testing me and WhoahNellie’s patience now.
*quietly hides superfluous ‘h’…*
*takes out a katana, chops the e of me and adds a y*
*watches as y slides elegantly by the m*
You have proved your Grammar hono(u)r, ImWithStupid.
*bows*
*tries desperately to not worry*
ACK!!!!!!!!
TWO MORE MISSING APOSTROPHES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Don’t worry about a thing. Every little thing’s gonna be alright now.
Hammykins, seriously now –
Are you a buffalo soldier?
Don’t you worry ’bout a thing,
don’t you worry ’bout a thing momma.
‘Cause I’ll be standing on the side
when you check it out.
comma police, arrest this man, he talk in lol-speak.
*throws jules up an ’s’*
*adds ’s’*
Hold on to it, you may need it again.
Oh I am sure I will. ’s’ is the bane of my existence.
Holy crap u guys are 10000x funnier that the video XD
Order now and you get a free Wunder Boner.
And a year’s supply of ShamWow…
What exactly would a years supply of ShamWow be? One set? Two? 50?
Just a couple.
Compare with a sponge. This lasts ten years. This lasts two weeks.
I dunno… it sells itself.
I dunno, Vince seems to be pimping it out on a regular basis.
*rubs eyes*
OH! ‘Pimping it out’! I read as ‘pumping’ …
I blame the Wunder Boner.
*Exactly* what is wrong with peeing in the woods? Just act like you are looking for a lost ball…beats the hell out of carrying a piss-filled club in your golfbag. What kind of mess would that make if you forgot to empty it, only to have it leak in your bag in a hot car trunk? Then you could wear piss smelling golf shoes, or the handles of your other clubs might need re-wrapping.
Just get some Depends and play through it…
tl;dr *stomps Jimmy into ground*
Yoo no not says so muches stoopid obvious stuffs! OK?*wanders by*
*picks up strange jimmy-shaped pancake*
…hmmmmmmmm…
*puts pancake back on ground*
*walks away humming something by the Black Keys*
*FALCON PAUNCHES Boggy* IMMA FIRIN MAH LAZOR!!! >8^O========
*FALCON PAUNCHES Boggy* IM’A FIRIN MAH LAZAH!!!! >8^O=============================================
*steals Jimmy’s asterisks and uses them*
Can’t wait to see the product they invent for when you need to take a shit. Fecoclub? maybe it would come with a bigger towel.
As someone that plays golf, I must say I have never had to pee extremely bad on a golf course ever ! Although, it could be because i’m really fat and i just sweat it all out…
[img]http://public.tektek.org/img/emotes/sick.gif[/img]
? Haha.
<img src=”http://public.tektek.org/img/emotes/sick.gif”
No…probably not…
What’s wrong with diapers now all a sudden?
That depends.
u have a point. i know this doesn’t involve me cuz i i’m a big boy now, but diapers are a viable solution. it’s too bad b/c racist old men who watch the o’relly factor religiously can’t afford diapers on the golf course anymore.
Still trying to get my head around golfing+can’t afford diapers=?wtf
Thank you!!
If you have that much difficulty holding it, maybe you should be investing in some good ol’ Depends.
well, that’s one real club less you can carry in your bag… you’re only allowed 14 clubs in the bag and this one definitely fits the definition of a club… after all, some pro got disqualified because he had a miniature golf club key ring ornament in his bag
thats crazy didnt hear about that!
definite hole in one.
You had better hope not!!
I don’t understand. So every time he needs to pee he is going to get out his pickle, while he is waiting his turn, and urinate in front of everyone? How is that better than urinating in the bushes? Sigh.
wtfrick
Frank can you hand me my wood?
- But Jim we’re on the green what would you need a wood for now?
*Jim winks to the camera*
So does it take two days until YouTube marks the video as pulled nowadays?
Holding your cock in a green bag in the middle of a field is way less embarrassing than going behind a tree!
Blue, no way… but green, sure.
The UROclub: “For old motherfuckers who officially have no shred of dignity left” TM
So you’ve gotta pee…You put on the stupid towel…Take the cap off this “must have” contraption & put it under said “included” towel…Whip out your tallywacker and try to piss in a hole the size of a half dollar…This is done without being able to see what your trying to hit because of said towel keeping things supposedly modest and proper…So now, you’re pissing all over the handle of this genius invention, your hand holding it, soaking the towel and most likely your pants and shoes! Besides being the laughing stock of your golf buddies who’ve now nicknamed you “Mr. Pissy” and who yell loudly for you to “Pull out your Piss Wedge” everytime you get remotely near a green to howls of gut-busting laughter, you get the distinct pleasure of smelling like an unflushed urinal all round and on a long, hot day?? JEEBUS!! You’ll be impressing everyone within 50 yards on those always backed up Par 3’s! Certainly a “must have”…Yeeeaaahhh…Rrriiiiigggghhhhtttt….
You had trouble getting potty trained as a kid, didn’t you?
So… you’re saying you currently own one?
That’s funny!
So, is this an actual product or a joke? Anyone know?
Oh. My. God.
Why didn’t I invent this?!
>.> Seriously, though, how did that board meeting go when someone pitched this?
yes, it’s very discreet, other than the fact that you’re pissing into a golf club. what the hell?!
how does the female version work?
Same product, alternate application.
The towel really wouldn’t work as well for us.
XD
ooops..
[color=white](click click)[/color]
fail
hm wait! worked!
but it didnt change the color…
double fail:\
oh shit!!! it’s leaving from the nose too!!
and i meant… ” worked”…
triple fail
!!!!!!!!!!!! >:O “” WORKED
LOL
NEVERMIND!!! >_<
Try using .
BFF, you know drugs won’t help.
Gah! That didn’t work.
Sigh. Bukkit please.
There are thousands of doctors that will disagree with you Hammy.
last attempt
WHY BLUE?! WHY BLUEEE? (now true last attempt)
<color??? :\
what is it?? :\
.
i tried to color the link and bold lol
adasdasdas
I have to ask…. attempt at what?
to make the number two on the golfclubto change the color of words on my replies to white :T
not white still… :\
maybe this will work?
Lol, nope, ‘font color=xxx’ doesn’t work.. Seems like the site uses limited html tags.
& … n … b … s …
It makes it appear as though you’re checking out your golf club?
I’m checking out my golf club with both hands at my waist under this convenient hand towel. Chyeah, okay.
What if it overflows?
Then boy, will your face be red!
If that happens, you should probably see a doctor.
that was really funny
Why dont you have a can under the towel and peepee in that–or you could just not care, you pay good money to golf, you should be allowed to urinate where ever you want.
After drinking 8 beer, the club will be overflowing with urine.
Really?
Come on, pee on a tree like the rest of the real golfers….Now if you can make something I can easily poop in, we can talk.
The Evil One suggests you just save the $50 (to help pay for your next round or beers afterward) and just help water the golf course…Then you don’t have to lie to your buddies about how your practicing your new, super secret grip under that stylish towel…And why your golf bag suddenly smells like hot piss!
LINK
The privacy shield hooks to the sides of the pants or belt and adds stability. This allows freedom of the hands to manipulate the club and zipper. The entire club is made of a non-porous material. Therefore, caring and cleaning is effortless!
The UroClub™ is intended to eliminate anxiety and any feeling of uneasiness on the course. It can be emptied at the nearest restroom or later on, when the golfer returns home.
Capacity: Over half a liter, twice the volume commonly urinated.
Length: Like a standard 7 Iron
U wonder hat went on UNDER the desks at he office the day this come out?
I*
What*
The*
Came*
You just did WHAT to the came?!
I accidenty the came.
and the the
And the I
…And the What….
…And Seriously…
…OH GOD THE COMBO’S GOT IT’S REVENGE…
I never liked those things. They’re almost as gross as Bugles. I didn’t know they were out for revenge, though, that’s upsetting news.
I may have to buy one of these…
I may have to try one of these…
So they`ve invented a club that takes the piss out of the player?
and tbh, i`d pay serious money to see a pro player use this to make a shot, as see what the commentators say.
why do white men like black holes so much?
Because black holes are the the tightest & best to get your white balls stuck into,,,
Wait we are still talking about golf right
The people that come up with ideas on how to improve golf and golf merchandise must be running out of ideas.
Mercerized UroClub? Sexy.
This CANNOT be true. For whoever’s sake
words cannot describe how much I want one of these!
Appears to be working on his short game.
Get in the hole!
If you aren’t a golfer, logic states you have to store this thing ‘reservoir’ down in your golf bag… …hope its got a tight seal.
I wish Dr. Manhattan had worn one of these in “The Watchmen.” Or at least a pair of undies… or a friggin’ fig leaf for crying out loud. Please! Someone… erase this flaccid blue-ish glowing schlong from my memory! Brain bleach! Brain bleach!
Ow man, it’s real? oO”
Lol this is rofl to the extreme
“no embarassing moments..”
I love that slogan
This just got mentioned on Radio 1.
A new way to sink your putz.
Ummmm… clubs go in the bag =grip down=, so if you cross-thread the top or simply forget to put it on tightly, you’ll also fill your expensive bag with whiz, possibly moistening your other club grips at the same time. Genius.
This was really funny where can i get this dick golf club lol
So what happens when you use it to play after going in it? lol…
That’s…terrible. Just awful. Who the hell thought that up and how?
This commercial seems so professional, but no way this can be real ..??
How can is be discreet with that green bag over your lap. Everyone who has seen this commercial would know you’re taking a piss.
I am curious about the amount of money the guy in the commercial was paid for doing that…
Yeahhh… somehow I don’t think that golf club idea is going to catch on…
i would rather have a sh*t club!
Lets see, im in the bunker… should I use my wedge or the one filled with my pee!!!
“Piss Wedge…Piss Wedge…Piss Wedge!!! Easy in, easy out!!”
rofl mao?
Wow – this can’t be real…can it?
WTF!!!???
I had to watch it again with the sound on to make sure it was a stupid as I thought
And the sad, sad, very sad thing is I actually worked for the call center that sold these things, can tell you what colors they come in, have been told what other ‘fun’ things they’ve been used for, and had to process the returned ones. There wasn’t enough ‘EW’ involved!
I can’t help but wonder how much money those men were paid to stand around and pee into a golf club…
I also can’t help but wonder why the hell they would WANT to be in an add for a uroclub. I mean, you have to REALLY lack a sense of dignity.
As this is a golf club, it would count against the 14-club limit that you are allowed to take onto the course according to the rules of golf. So, which club are you going to sacrifice to take this thing instead? Hmm.
In all the years I’ve been playing golf, there’s absolutely never any implied embarassment about peeing in the trees. It’s accepted as part of the game.
At least it’s better than their previous idea – the “crap bat”…
Never made it out of the minor leagues then I take it…
u have GOT to be kidding me
Dude…LOL
I wonder how many takes they had to get the announcer to stop laughing
The mistake was thinking that putting a golf club right in front of your crotch with a towel over it would make people think that you were “checking it out”.
This looks like an SNL spot
Will this put more force in your swing or what?
That’s like a all-in-one club.
I peed for 102ft…
you see, my problem is that if I owned that, I’d accidentally use it as an actual club…
stick ur club in the club xD
public leaking
Psych!
What on earth are you doing over here?
You screw around too much.
Stop screwing around!
fail
Where was te urination? O.o
I showed this to my mom. She bought it for my grandpa for his birthday. He loved it.
I hate my family.
OH its cool..
:sickly:
:green:
(“comments on”) Tour baby.