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Arthur Eld was here.
All your posts belong to mine.
Your post owns my post?
you must have been lied to also
Pretty much constantly am sure.
do you need the bukkit or was that intentional
That was intentional, but it’s grammatically wrong. I tend to type how I pronounce. Am unsure what the bukkit makes of this.
I’m pretty sure we can just solve this issue with a *SQUEEZE*
Heheh, that tickled! Now let’s *SQUEEZE* the moomin!
W00T! Nothing like a good ol’ fashioned *SQUEEZE!*
i think the worst part is its penis is hanging down o.O
lol my dog sleepwalks all the time…only when it hits the wall it stays asleep o.O
dude that’s not it’s penis, that’s the dog tail, dogs have a bit of a habbit when they are either thinking or hurt or they were scared, they put their tail down, but when hurt or scared, they put their tail between their legs…
…around the neck.
*swoops in, distracts Christopher with a SMOOCH*
*All anger leaves Christopher*
*Goofy smile*
You even think about hurting my moomin and you’ll find yourself on the business end of the worst *FOOOM!* of your life, mister.
Well, technically, I don’t believe that even the best FOOOM! of my life is a good thing.
The moomins are our friends! Besides, Mr. Cuddles totally had my back today.
Please don’t hurt my moomin Christopher!
I shouldn’t have to warn you Christopher that causing injury to a Moomin is grounds for dismissal. Since you and Avis have a failwedding to plan I wouldn’t be risking your employment at present if I were you.
To be fair, when I said “… around the neck”, I thought we were talking about squeezing willdog.
Actually, Christopher, the way I look at it, your “around the neck” comment was in direct response to McFail!!!!
RAWR. WINmonster was here
What’s with Christopher’s moomin rage?
Oh crud. I missed that there were multiple pages until just now.
Sorry Christopher.
Please disregard.
# Throw back the little ones
and pan fry the big ones.
Use tact, poise and reason
and gently *SQUEEZE* them. #
Pretty poetic for a rock
I think you’re gonna need it for a while yet.
who me?
Have a guess.
Hint – yes, you.
Couldn’t be. . .
Wouldn’t be…
then who…?
The TROLLS stole the cookie from the cookie jar!
Bettter, but not quite there.
ahhh what am i doing wrong
Look at all your capitals and punctuation to start.
Ohhhh. Sorry, I didn’t realize that you people were that picky. Is that better?
We’re going to be that picky if you keep pushing the bukkit.
I really am not qualified to say today. If you saw my posts on the intercourse fail, you’d see why. Hazarding a guess, yes, that’s better.
We aren’t really that picky but like Avis said, if pass the bukkit to someone else, be ready to use it yourself.
You didn’t? I’ve seen your comments quite often in the last couple of days. How come you didn’t realize?
*ignores aiki’s missing “you”*
*facepalm*
Why can’t I get any of this right today?!
*Reaches for bukkit, realizes it’s empty from excessive use*
Anyone got a spare?
Avis, the only thing more disturbing than your correcting of everybody’s spelling is the fact that you don’t appear to have a life other than on FAIL Blog.
I’m happy to give you a reprieve this time because you do TRY to not need it.
HOLD UP! I know you’re not dissing my Avis. Someone hold my shit! *starts taking jewelery off*
Umm… Let’s not go there willdog, that would be hazardous.
*Looks around to see if Christopher heard*
Just take the grace that Avis gave you and be happy. We’re all friends here.
*offers a cookie*
*takes p from mr. cuddles*
No, I’m not dissing Avis. I’m just getting disturbed.
He’s just miffed that he got called out on his double standard.
*squeezes Mr. Cuddles, but holds on*
It’s okay… let it go this time. It won’t happen again, right willdog?
A cookie for me! Is Christopher here?
*looks for hiding spot*
No one tell where I am.
Aiki, the reprieve was for you.
No, it won’t, don’t worry.
And Mr. Cuddles… did you mean shirt or shit?
Oh… Thanks for the reprieve Avis. That pudding was gross today.
I mean shit as a synonym for my earrings, necklace, and ring.
Gives Mr. Cuddles a great big cookie and a *SQUEEZE*!
Thank you!
*SQUEEZE* Anything for you Avis
I have question for any of you seasoned FB bloggers. How do you post things under your ICHC account? I am sick of having this little pink geometric shape as my avatar.
gravatar.com
Go to Gravatar dot com. Follow the instructions. It will take a a few minutes before it shows up here.
*doesn’t have an ICHC account*
Neither do I, Avis. I only come here.
Testing, testing….
DAMN IT!!!
You may need to clear your browser cache too. It may also take a little bit before it shows here.
It’s working now thewilldog.
Testing, testing…
Dang. That’s not my picture.
I’ll be back in half an hour. It better be working by then.
Looks like your picture to me.
Maybe the racoon got it?
Be careful around that slutty raccoon. It will gnaw your
dickface off!Yay, it did work! Was it there the whole time?
Yeah… Patience and an open mind are key here. Oh and sometime a deranged mind.
*waits for aikiwaza to notice his mistake*
I know, I know. *adds an “s”*
You may as well just give in to it, sweetie. If you keep going around correcting all your posts, the threads will soon be much too full!
You forgot the “s” again. (Finaly got the gravatar.com thing to work on my computer.)
Did you do that on purpose?
Mystraven? As in the games?
♫No one to talk to ….all by myself♫
♫No one to walk with…..I’m happy on the shelf♫
♫Ain’t mystraven……savin’ all my love for you♫
*squeeze!*
And a hardy squeeze back. How’s with you?
Oh my God! That wasn’t on topic. Profuse apologies.
Your squeeze wasn’t on topic either. I guess neither of us will ever catch on to the proper behavior. *sigh*
I’m proud to be a rebel.
♫She’s a rebel ’cause she never ever does what she should♫
Lack of capitalization, for one thing.
Lack of punctuation, for another.
If you are going to suggest that someone needs the bukkit, at least make an effort not to need one yourself.
Sorry, I guess I misunderstood the use of the bukkit.
Oh, here I thought that thing was a barf bucket. . . I will clean it off later. . .
*hands DAN FB money*
Now they belong to me!!!
You’ve been conned. DAN’s post owns the post, not DAN.
Argh!
*walks over to DAN and grabs the money, then throws it at the computer screen in an attempt to buy it from DAN’s post.*
Sorry Mikey, it won’t sell.
It’s probably for the best, his post’s value just droped anyway.
*tosses in her missing “p”*
*catches the “p” and runs away with it*
Get back her with that *shakes fist at mr. cuddles*
*drops off an extra “e” for McFail and runs away again with her “p”*
Son-of-a… I need to go have more coffee.
Make it hot chocolate instead and then come cuddle in front of the fire with me!
Done and done!
Reading this was better than watching a Looney Toons cartoon.
*squeeezes!* for all!
*SQUEEZE* Care to join us Dragonwriter? There is plenty of room in front of the fire.
I’d love to! Can I bring the Admiral with me?
Of course you can! The more the merrier
*SQUEEEZES in*
Ooh, can I join you?
I have cookies.
And I have freshly SQUEEEEZEd orange juice.
*SQUEEZES BFF* Absolutely!
I’ll take some with pulp.
*takes chance and doesn’t refresh, GRIN*
*SQUEEZES mr. cuddle* Someone could be suffocated from all this SQUEEZing.
Hi, gang. Just got here. What’s the reason for the squeezin’? And can I join in?
Who needs a reason for a squeezin’??
*squeeze!*
Squeezin’ is the reason for the season.
Welcome back thewilldog! *SQUEEZE*
*SQUEEZE*
Just call me willdog, someone already took it on gravatar.
But not here. Here you can go back to whatever you want.
Hmm… does it suit me? I think it makes me look fat.
*puts on good boyfriend costume* No, you look perfect
Try it without the lipstick.
Aww… thanks.
*Quick squeeze. Looks away embarrassed.*
Lipstick! I would have thought it was my mascara that put it overboard.
*squeezes Judy for remembering Captain Kangaroo*
*SQUEEZES Mr Cuddles*
You just look so damn cuddly, I can’t help myself…
Hehe! YAY!
So that’s how you do it!
Well, there goes our air of mystique…
Hammy, it doesn’t always work. And they can damned hard to catch.
Well, I don’t plan on trying it. My curiosity has been satiated, and that’s all I really wanted.
Are you talking about the nesting thing?
Yeah. I saw MikeyD do it once, and it’s been killing me ever since.
Me too. I just couldn’t find exactly what was doing it in the source code.
Must have been a painful experience, being killed so long.
Indeed. They say “curiosity killed the cat” as a warning againts being nosy, but I think what really happened was that the cat couldn’t stand not knowing, so it just killed itself.
He’s getting better!
Want some random quotations that are contradictory? Try “Seek and ye shall find” along with “curiosity killed the cat”.
I know at least 5 others
*observes empty hot chocolate mugs, and dying embers*
sigh
I missed another squeeze fest.
*pokes at coals*
*tiptoes in*
*SQUEEZE!*
*observes empty hot chocolate mugs and dying embers*
sigh
It looks like I missed another squeeze fest.
*sits and pokes coals*
The first sign of old age is repeating yourself.
Oops, doubles!
Wow; a surprise super squeeze rocks my world!
Bugger! It won’t let me say the same thing twice! *sigh*
That takes the fun out of it for me now.
Oh, no. Don’t be sad dragon.
*conjures fire resistant flowers with a sudden flourish*
I’m still getting the hang of this. In fact, I just discovered “show all”.
teehee
*snorkity*
…Need a *squeeze*?
Woops. That ^ was for jam.
*takes flowers*
Thank you! It can take a while to get used to things around here, I know. Here…cookies make things easier.
*offers cookie*
I’d love a squeeze. *squeeze*.
Thanks, just what the dragon ordered.
Mmmm, tasty.
*Suddenly finds failblogging to be natural and continues without further ado*
Thanks!
*offers to SQUEEZE and be SQUEEZED* *sips hot chocolate*
*takes TS20 up on her offer*
*SQUEEZE!*
Oooh! A SQUEEZE-fest-nest!
Here you go >> Multiple squeezes all around!
*Fans wings to stir the coals back to life*
I brought some mini marshmallows for the hot chocolate.
“p” anyone?
Geesh – ya gotta be quick in this jernt.
You spelled “up in hurr” wrong.
Ghey!!
He looked confused to me.
G-hey are you that professor guy from The Simpsons? Flavin!
All your base are belong to us!
no, just to me. they are mine alone, gimmie!
I think you meant “All your posts belong to ME*”
You know what that is originally from?
I sure hope so.
*scans the horizon for Arthur Eld*
*waves*
*hops on Arthur Eld’s back* Now lets ride off into the sunset!
*sits back to watch the reaction*
Are we talking nuclear fission or merely chemical?
I guess that depends on Arthur. I was thinking nuclear but I am know for being wrong.
*throws aiki up an “n”*
Thanks.
*takes “n” an inserts into previous post*
My grammar and spelling walked out on me today.
*hands aiki an entire spare alphabet, complete with punctuation accessory and optional grammar repair*
Use it well.
Many thanks! I will attempt to not need it!
At first, I read aiki’s comment as “My grammar and spelling wanked out on my today.”
It seemed strangely appropriate.
Nooo… No wanking on the job.
Just lay back on this couch and relax. Now what are your earliest memories?
Sometimes a wank is just a wank.
*wanks*
I MEAN *WINKS*!! Really!
I think that you’re loosing your grip.
She needs finishing school?
She would graduate cum laude, I am sure. (I think that I am getting a wee bit tacky)
No, I’d graduate Phi Beta Kappa-yo-ass!
…*snorkity*…
I made myself giggle.
*gallops off into sunset*
*realizes his broken ankle*
*hobbles*
*comes along with a stroller*
*pushes Artur Eld into the sunset*
*moves slightly back from sunset to avoid us getting burnt*
*SQUEEZE*
Arthur, what are you doing down here squeezing by yourself?
Probably squeezing in his sleep. Ah, will you look at that? He seems so happy! Shhh, let’s not wake him.
*puts blancket over Arthur’s shoulders and tiptoes away*
Arthur, you can’t do that at work!
*sneaks back in, removes c, tiptoes around bukkit, leaves Arthur’s office quietly and hangs note on door: Do Not Disturb *
*awakes*
Man, what a dream I had! Millions of people watching me in my sleep… Where does this blanket come from? Ah, who cares? Good morning, everybody!
Wow, it seems like that dog was having a “nocturnal emission”
This was one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen
This was on Yahoo yesterday! C’mon, man!
All over Twitter yesterday, too.
Video no longer available
Woah! That’s far too new for failblog.
I’ll watch it in a month then.
Here’s what else Twitter had to say to me about the sleepwalking dog (clickie).
To be completely fair, failblog does post videos up on their YT page a day or two before they do so on the site.
Hm…now I feel like I’ve been living under a rock, since I’ve never seen this before today.
*pout*
Don’t feel too bad. I haven’t seen it before today either, and I didn’t know about half of these sites.
I still haven’t seen it!
You didnt know about yahoo and twitter?
Were you living under a rock?
But…it wasn’t a rock!
No…it just FELT like a rock!
Wow, that’s a damn big lobster!
Actually, it was just sitting there on my head. You know…like a hat.
*smacks self*
Where was I? I forgot the point that I was making.
Weren’t you saying that someone in this town is trying to burn the playhouse down?
No, no…I think I was saying that if I were a carpenter, I’d hammer on my piglet…
*refuses to do a Beat Your Meat joke*
PLEASE DON’T. In an almost entirely unrelated topic, I went grocery shopping yesterday and there were dried figs called “Figlets!”
When you say “PLEASE DON’T”, do you want me to do a Beat Your Meat joke? Well I’m not going to because I haz class.
I’m hot for teacher?
Yes, you are.
Onto vote page yes…
Weeks till it goes on official mainpage >_<
It was on Dooce two days ago.
And on TheBloggess.
I heard Sean Penn’s making a movie of it. So he can compare the dog to the USA when he gets an Oscar for it.
I heard Sean Penn was cast to play the dog. He researching his character by eating dog food and pooping in the yard…wait – that’s no different than any other day at Sean Penn’s house
Sounds about right, actually.
You forgot about the part where Penn steals the Oscar from Mickey Rourke and then give him a “shout out” at the awards ceremony.
What a grouch.
I knew it would be up here as soon as I saw it, and I actually thought while I was watching it, “I wonder if anyone’s submitted this yet?”
sheesh, it was on goddamned CNN the other day!
Yeah, the Simpsons did it.
Well, their family motto IS, actually, “Not in the face!”
He was chasing a raccoon.
Or Lisa, who loves Dick.
So THAT’S what the raccoons name was!!
*inserts an apostrophe where needed*
I like how he stealthily creeped up on it before breaking into a full sprint
Lol, I guess he’s a Failblog regular.
yap.. its old!
Even the wienerless russian guy knows this one!
I guess that’s the Web for you. Post a funny one and WOOOOF!!, it’s all over the internet in no time.
Don’t start with the puns, that is just barking up the wrong tree.
This could be a ruff one.
I hope people won’t start whining about this.
If they do, they’ll be in the doghouse for sure.
Doggone it, I promised I would stop making puns!
New law says to clean up after your pun.
Well the leash you could do is try harder.
I don’t think we’ll be able to curb the puns on this one.
‘Kay–nine of us have voted to continue the pun-run. All opposed?
All those opposed collar out now!
I don’t think that will curtail the puns
They’re boned to run out eventually.
I’m getting hungry…anyone have some chow?
No, but I am dog-tired.
Lhasa your energy?
It takes a lot of energy when your husky.
When my husky what?
Sorry. Just doggin’ ya!
Have y’all been outside lately? Springlike! What a great dane the neighborhood!
Well I’ll be(agle) damned. It is Spring-like outside!
*puts to use the new complete alphabet repair kit that Nellie gave him and throws ‘ and e up into his last post*
Well, we can bury our differences i guess.
*like a St. Bernard dog, helps aikiwaza by capitalising “i”*
Argh… I’m just going to tuck my tail and run with it.
Me gramer is ofishaly gon tooday.
*smacks himself*
No smacking self during work hours!
Siriusly?
orioneously
Orion should put a leash on that dog star, for it is an
“evil portent, bringing heat
And fevers to suffering humanity.”
~ Homer
You’re quoting the Simpsons now? *shakes head in sadness*
Doctor! I didn’t know you watched the Simpsons!
Id have thought he preferred “Frasier”.
Okay, so I forgot to change it back.
Yeah, I was NEVER “Gumby” for 12 posts.
But…but…I saw what you did there!
I know, hammy was cute there. I hope it wasn’t an unconscious punctuation error.
Hee! An apostrophic complex, perhaps.
It was intentional. I’m sure the doctor would agree – there are no mistakes. Everything happens for a reason.
What a depressing thought.
S’okay…I don’t believe it anyway.
*hug*
You’re right, but my pun lake seems to have turned into a poodle. . . See what I mean!?
At least we don’t get pugnacious about it. I think.
Speaking of pugnacious, does anyone else have a fetish for cute guys with black eyes? I can’t find any I like on Google.
Would you settle for hazel/green/blue (depending on shirt color)?
I have big green eyes.
But I do like a giant bruise around a man’s. Losing a fight is sexy.
Umm…when you said “with black eyes” I was thinking “eyes so dark brown that they look black”.
But that…ewwww. Nononononono.
(I have big green eyes, too!)
you don’t have to tell me twice, baby
*runs into the door*
Never lost a fight. Never been in a fight. I once stopped a fight at the Seafair
Torch Light parade with a firm “Cool it!”. I think that I have a nasty glare. Weird.
… AND GIVES A GREAT BIG LOVING BLACK-EYED KISS TO DILETTANNTE ON HER BIRTHDAY … RIGHT NOW!!!!!
I know you do, Dragon, you’ve interrupted some lovin’ telling me
that:) But I know, that’s an odd fetish. And coyote, that’s nothing, AT ALL, to be ashamed of.
Fuzzy, how’s that eye looking? I’d ice it, but then it wouldn’t get blue…
ALL OVER KISSES ON YOU … and keep that ice cube traveling up and down and all around
Woot! Love you, baby.
Ok, in my defense it is often very difficult to tell the difference between your “lovin’” and a series of bizarre non-sequiturs understood by only two people on the board.
So I’m SORRY already!! And I’ll butt out of your bruise admiring now.
:p
You know what I’ll do with that ice cube.
I love you, Dragon, and I’m being silly. No need to “butt out”. Green eyes are not all that connect us, darlin’.
*licks the ice cubic area*
*licks the nice rhymes with cubic area*
♥ ♥ CUZ IT’S YOUR BIRTHDAY ♥ ♥
… and the icing on the cake is no lie
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
So where should I slide this Olynpic Ring?
To the innocent joy truth always just there…
while we doesn’t forget the JAMMIN’.
Aw, who loves a good strawberry jam. To the both innocent and not-so-innocent joy you give me *toasts*
I won’t hound you over your failure to keep your promise.
Stop baskering in your misery.
You said not to start with puns and, of course, made a dog pun. FAIL!
*facepalm*
(Whispers to Avis)
Does s/he know that was intentional?
*whispers back*
I doubt it.
*doesn’t bother whispering but belly laughs for all she’s worth*
Dat was funny.
*Squeezes Dragonwriter to stop her sides from splitting*
*performs a reverse-bunny and pulls himself into his own tophat*
*tophat falls to the floor and rolls underneath table*
Hm. I wonder if I could do that…
*tries*
Great. Now there’s a big hammykins-shaped hole in my hat.
“OHHH YEAHHHHH!” “Oh. oh.”
*backs slowly out of room*
aww poor doggie – hell of a way to wake up – he must have been chasing a tasty meal in the dream
I rolled over my doggie’s ear with my chair and she made the same noise. Possibly this doggie was getting rolled on?
Ouch… that can be called a painful wake up…
Ehm normal wake-up for me i guess…
So you lie on the floor when you sleep and kick your legs back and forth when you wake up?
made funnier since their name is grandma
Yeah, if grandma is on the floor kicking a leg, there’s a good chance she’s having a stroke.
or that she is having a good time all by herself!
That’s what scannerdan said, having a stroke. He didn’t specify what she was stroking…
hehehe
I think I’ll cover my ears now, as I really don’t want to know what grandma was stroking.
(“something about a McPussy”)
Would you like that Super Sized?
Dunno, ask Grandma.
Is that like a grilled cheese sandwhich?
*sammitch
Now THAT’S funny!
I think my mind is forever scarred by that image.
Give it time. There is plenty on here that will scar you. I’d start a secret account for funds to pay for the therapy you’ll need in the near future.
Good idea. I’ve seen some disturbing comments here. I just never used to post anything before.
Get used to that. We say all KINDS of mind scarring things here. Be careful of name links too, what has been seen cannot be unseen. There is no such thing as brain bleach. I’ve looked.
My favorite name link so far (^Clickie^)
For some reason YouTube doesn’t always work for me. Given the title of that particular gem, I think I’m happy I can’t see the video!
It’s completely safe for work. Ryannon had me in tears the day she posted that.
It’s funny. I had a small crowd behind me watching. They were laughing too.
The internet fairies won’t let me see it. I see the title and hear the sound, but no picture. The title leads one to believe it is… of questionable content.
I don’t get the title. I know what it means, but why for this particular video?
I watched at work. It’s okay for that. The questionable part will be your sanity after watching it.
Yeah, this used to by Ry’s link…
OxiClean and a ShamWow couldn’t even touch this one.
I concur with scannerdan. Here is my reaction:
*curls up into ball, rocking to and fro, murmuring “They’re not real people, they’re not real people*
*jots down “Pickle Surprise” in suspicious black notebook*
You have a notebook that acts suspiciously?
Yes, it’s been seen prowling around neighbo(u)rhoods, peering through peoples’ windows and checking for entryways.
Sounds like an episode of Supernatural, which incidentally is the reason I haven’t been failblogging as much lately.
OMG!!!!! You, too! I’m totally besotted by that show!
It totally shouldn’t have, but that comment made me laugh. And now I can’t stop!
You made me spit Pepsi at my computer! I lol’d too hard.
At least you didn’t spit Popsie at your computer.
What’s wrong with that? I run into the wall on a daily basis too.
8th lol, he ran straight into the wall
i laughed so hard
PERFECT example. If Beorn had his way, every post would look like this one.
bahahahaha that was hilarious!!
Poor Confused Dog Thinks:
“Damn! Where’d that field full of very slow rabbits go?”
Maybe squirrels. . .
*ponders skwerls sleepwalking in trees…*
Are yo sure he wasn’t chasing you in his dream.
Nah, looked to me more like he was running away from something than towards something… notice how hard that tail is curling between his legs right from when he starts sleep-running.
I just Lmao’d
Dito.
*hands aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa an extra ‘t’ and passes the bukkit*
The bukkit is busy today. Mostly thanks to me, but still…
Maybe we need a trough.
I don’t know if I could take that.
I’d be down with the trough, but only if ts filled with pig slop.
*takes scannerdan’s post out to the trough and finds extra ‘i’ and apostrophe*
All better! Maybe it’s more like a community chest for misplaced letters?
I’ve been skillfully dodging the bukkit today. I’ve made quite a lot of errors but either nobody has noticed *hopes* or nobody cares. Probably the latter!
I care to comma on your post. The bukkit is most commonly used as a self-policing mechanism.
Apostrophe she didn’t realize that.
Damn it! Self policing? My skillful dodging will have to come to a full stop then.
Swap it for an “a”! S/he has so many of ‘em.
sheesh, failblog is on the trailing edge these days
Omg Poor dog!
yet another originality fail.
this has been featured on collegehumor.com for a few days now.
on another note, if anything this is a sleepwalking win.
indeed, next time you go sleepwalking make sure to run off a cliff. j/k
You again! You’re not-so-cleverly disguising your spammer identity, you shill.
I understand that you used to be able to make good money in England shilling.
Yes, I hear the compencation was good.
RRRR!
*does victory dance*
I will pound you for pun-thievery!
RRRRRRRRR!!!!
Don’t you have some spanish galleons to hunt down?
Boo! Guinea do better than that, guys?
Francly, I think you’re a lira.
Hey! I dinar know what you’re talking about! Euro being mean.
I’m not going to let you drachma into another argument. If you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a yen for some olives.
You’re making me pencive.
Just a bit of quid pro quo.
A sterling observation.
I notice that you changed you avatar.
Another nurse pic for ya, I went as Elle from Kill Bill for Halloween.
Makes cents.
That dog has flees.
yay comment win!
Wow, I say that comment was Louse-y
I almost didn’t get it at first. Yay, comment win!
It wasn’t much of a head scratcher. . . Ok I will stop.
Sorry, sometimes I am retarded.
*removes the “sometimes” for insulting Avis*
Hey now BFF. He got his rebuke and is sorry and is going to not let it happen again.
*takes the sometimes from BFF, thinks it over, hands it back to BFF*
Well since you weren’t here…
I was skimming through the threads, so I probably skipped his apology. I suppose he should be forgiven, but still, calling Avis a “no-lifer”? Jeez.
Oh… I agree. It was a brash move. My comment sounded more menacing then I meant it too. Here is a beverage.
*Hands BFF a cooler of assorted drinks*
Now’ no alcohol unless I’m not looking!
*gets distracted by the fail and turns away*
Ooh! Beer!
*reaches towards alcohol when aiki suddenly turns this way*
Er, I mean, Sprite! Yeah, I’ll have some Sprite.
*turns back around facing away*
That’s what I thought you said.
I was more amused that I was accused of correcting everyones spelling and grammar when HE was the one pushing the bukkit!
It was humorous. I find it funny that everyone’s grammar got better there for a bit.
*looks at the posts again*
Except mine.
I’m sorry about that. I had mistakenly understood that the bukkit was intended for mistakes. I was just writing using abbreviations and shortcuts. By the way, I only asked if someone needed just once.
*inserts the word “just” after the word indended*
*pats Aiki on the back*
It happens to all of us.
*thinks again*
OK, it happens to ME all the time.
Not using proper grammar is a mistake here.
willdog, I’m glad you’re here. You’re almost as bad as me.
*lends willdog a “t” and “it” for further up*
Thanks aiki, I caught that ‘t’ right as I posted it, but I knew someone would say something. I didn’t notice that ‘it’ though.
I can’t keep up with all these random letters bouncing around. It’s confoozling me.
I think I just got hit by a flying V.
Look out! Ws and Xs incoming!
*ducks*
Jam, was it a Fender or a Strat? I always forget.
Twas a Gibson!
A flying V? I think it’s Gibson.
I can never remember stuff like that!
For future reference, a Strat is a model made by the Fender company.
Indeed! I have a lesser known type. It’s known as the Jampson Rattler.
Made from a Brantano shoe box and elastic bands the postman threw away. Awesome sound!
I always thought a <i?flying V was represented by the Mighty Ducks.
Failure italics above.
*passes the bukkit*
It’s also a model of guitar made by Gibson.
All I knew is it was a stringed instrument. I didn’t want to say guitar incase it was a bass. I don’t play either. Can you tell?
*sigh*
“in case”
*KERSPLORT*
You can have a bass guitar though not the flying V type. Well, I’ve never seen one anyway.
I play a little. Can’t read music to save my life though.
*kers* *doonk* Hmm anyone else notice the bukkit getting a little low?
Gibson used to make a Flying V bass for a short time, but I think Epiphone or someone still makes a V-shaped bass.
I got a bukkit bypass from WhoaNellie.
Cool. The things you learn on FB.
I don’t play bass because I’m too short and my arms won’t reach.
I have to play an acoustic 3/4 size. How pathetic!
Yeah, basses have huge frets. I have an acoustic six-string and twelve-string myself. I also play some cello.
Nice. I’d love to play the cello. In fact I’d love to have my own studio where an example of every instrument ever invented could be found and played.
It’s all a pipe dream though!
That would be AWESOME!
I’ve been fortunate to have received training on multiple instruments. Back in Australia, the school music classes gave us the option of violin or cello. Then, when I got to high school (here in Canada) our music class consisted entirely of wind instruments, so I chose the horn.
Just so long as you don’t toot your own horn TOO often. It leads to overstretched ego muscles.
So you got the horn? Fabulous.
I had a few violin lessons at school and passed the first couple of gradings but it wasn’t my thing.
I play keyboard (a little) but I always really wanted a grand piano. I’ve never had any proper lessons though.
My dad had a friend who showed me a few guitar chords but mostly it was self taught (hence why I’m shit at it).
I grew up listening to my dad play Scott Joplin…
*nostalgic sigh*
Sorry. I’ve been told I can get like that when I talk about music. I was never good at sports or anything, and I suck at things like history and English.
Tsk. I wasn’t talking about you! I was just making a “horn” joke so I could use the word “toot” without being vulgar.
*squeeze*
You are amongst the very least egotistical of the failbloggers!
Why, thank you!
*bows humbly*
I had to laugh at my P.E teacher, she wasn’t the sharpest tool in the box.
I skived the 2 hour session every Tuesday afternoon and she’d give me a 1 hour detention on Wednesday. The mind boggles!
Wow. That’s just…. wow.
Itch was better than yours
Darn your pun-making abilities! Now I’m hopping mad!
A plague on your jealousy!
@Admiral–have you seen my socks anywhere?
*GRIN!!!*
Let’s check the bell tower!
Ooops, now I’m a bit ticked that I didn’t continue the pun-run!
Don’t let it bug you…you made up for it.
(Heeeeee! We haven’t tried out the new four-poster yet!)
I’ll bee right there, honey!
*is all a-buzz!*
*gazes at the bed suspended from four bells high overhead*
*tingles with harmonic anticipation*
*peeks over the edge of the bed*
Well…? Are you coming up?
*lowers bell rope*
*quickly scales rope and slides under covers*
*looks into your eyes and wings some poetry*
“Bee to the blossom, moth to the flame;
Each to his passion; what’s in a name?”
You certainly know how to make a dragon-fly…
Hive missed your touch…
I see you’re waxing poetic…here’s a little something from my favorite wordsmith for you.
Where the bee sucks, there suck I;
In a cowslip’s bell I lie;
There I couch when owls do cry.
On the bat’s back I do fly
After summer merrily.
Merrily, merrily shall I live now
Under the blossom that hangs on the bough.
*Is on solid ground facing away from the lovers, but is playing a lovely song on the lute for effect*
*wads Emp up into a little ball, inserts a fuse into his potato hole, lights it on fire with a decisive *FOOM!* and lobs him out of the thread.
Tsk, tsk, Emp, you should never interrupt a Dragon and an Admiral romancing.
I still remember when I had my derier set alight.
Now, my lovely Dragon…
.
Tell me where is fancy bred,
Or in the heart, or in the head?
How begot, how nourishèd?
Reply, reply.
It is engender’d in the eyes,
With gazing fed;
and fancy dies, and fancy dies
In the cradle where it lies.
.
Let us all ring fancy’s bell;
I will answer; I will tell.
Between true friends, it does well.
Let’s continue, –ding, dong, bell.
Derrière.
*boots everyone out, locks door, closes shades*
Ahhh…lovely, my Admiral.
You, too, have come where the dim tides are hurled
Upon the wharves of sorrow, and heard ring
The bell that calls us on; the sweet far thing.
*deserved it but was just attempting to be nice* Guess I should have done it from afar.
Spelling FAIL!
“Fleas”= parasitic hopping insects
“Flees”= runs away
Understanding a joke FAIL!
Hahaha!
that’s the second time for him too, maybe we need to start up a failblog humor tutorial.
I already have him signed up for Remedial Humo(u)r 101. This guy is a desperate case!
Because it’s not like the dog fled or anything…
Do you possess anything in the way of a sense of humor, or have you simply found a subtle way to annoy? Either break out a dictionary or google the word “pun”.
I would lift up the dog and put him down on his feet ^^
*giggles*
I was thinking that
Put it on a tredmill. Great alternative energy source.
Rather inefficient. Dogs are carnivores, and generally would eat grass or grain-fed domesticated animals, and would waste a lot of the energy stored in the animal doing so. The animals they eat would also only contain a tiny fraction of the energy transmitted to their food from the sun.
Much better to just use solar panels, or at least bio-ethanol, if you want something organic.
Good God.
Did you check out his name, puppy?
Apropos.
He is also wrong.
And clearly trolling, or he would have picked a different handle. Handle these types roughly.
Haha
Really funny! Poor doggy hit his head.
I wouldlift him up and make him stand so hed` be runing and walking all around the house!
Ok now, act real cool and pretend nothing happened.
That’s what a cat would do.
Yep
“…I meant to do that.”
He is all like so what you all looking at?
What a nail-biting conclusion. . .
Help, I’m a Rock!
congrats, failblog, you were beaten to this one by yahoo.
nice going.
They don’t call it failblog for nothing.
*chuckles*
*cleans up chuckle* Watch where you spew. *winks*
Sorry. I didn’t realise I followed through.
Reali”z”ing stuff is hard when we do it out of habit.
Don’t use the bukkit I have a bump on my head it is getting pretty empty.
I don’t believe I make a habit out of following through. *checks to be sure*
*wonders what the sticky stuff on the floor is*
Also, I’m not about to put my head in a fishy bukkit for a Z, especially since I’m English. I refuse to give up my heritage.
I hear you. Although, as a Canadian, I am free to choose either S or Z.
Surely that’s like batting for both teams? *scoffs*
I prefer to think of it as a kind of “right to free speech”.
We are you are correct though we tend to lean more to the “zed”.
Yeah, I never know which to choose… I mean, S looks so much nicer, but I kind of feel sorry for Z because it’s such an unpopular letter…
To me when you are in the act of realising it should be “s” as it seems to be a more action packed kind of letter. But when you just realize something the “z” is more appropriate.
Was actually first writing to ask about your background, but as a Canadian the “s” for some reason did not sit well with me. Though I am quite sure you do not have a habit of following through that was more of a
reference to one’s habit of the spelling of realise. Which I now apologize for as I did not know of your place of origin. God bless the reds, for you helped shape us. *offers cookie with apologetic eyes*
*presents bashful cheeks as I know you love to pinch them*
*actually hopes you enjoy it*
Bless! *pinches Emperor’s cheeks*
There’s really no need for an apology; I’m actually very hard to offend.
I’ll take your cookie though as I do so love all things sweet. *nibbles and offers the Emperor a bite*
The lady (jam) and the tramp (moi) kind of sharing?
*nibbles slowly*
Count me in.
Lady? *falls off chair laughing*
Oh you’re priceless. I love it!
*made a funny? for real?* Is it something I said?
woops *viciously rips cookie away* Sorry I don’t share like that.
Bleaches out lady and tramp comment.
Look, we all have urges. Just go with it.
Not my fault the average male has 10 gay tendencies in his life.
I just refuse to give into the tendencies, I don’t know the rate for women but I think it was much higher.
Ps yet another case for gender disclosure.
Emp, Jam is indeed a female. She just was amused at the thought of being refered to as a “Lady”.
10?! Who the hell took that survey? Lies, there are WAY more.
Then her link mislead me *Embarrassed apologetically returns cookie with the look of a five year old who knows they have done something wrong.*
I did not want to say girl as that seems like I am calling her a child, and lady is informal but still respectful.
Ps i wasn’t counting the many types of urges. It is the amount an average guy experiences in his life.
*cough* *bullshit* *cough*
*guffaws loudly and falls off chair again*
Fortunately its true.
It was also beaten by MSN.
Is this his wiener at 0:22?
That’s what I was wondering. I don’t think he was chasing rabbits, I think he was chasing a lady-dog!
I think that was his tail. . .
Hard to say…
If it wasn’t his tail, then this dog is hung like a mule.
ok, wow. you need to go visit that guy in Russia with his raccoon…weirdo
ANATOMY FAIL!
It’s a TAIL.
(rhyming win!)
Not being able to tell the difference between a tail and a wiener could get you in trouble…
“Look! That man is wagging his tail in front of me!”
It’s a failblog fail… That is a dog having a seizure. My dog did that for 2 years before he died from it. Except he peed when he “ran” like that… fail
wow! I think i just died a little inside.
And the award for biggest comment thread killjoy goes to…
some dogs do dream like that. some do as you have said, but not all. relax a little. sorry for your loss
My dog barks and wags his tail in his sleep. If he does that, than dogs can sleep walk.
I saw this on the news here in Seattle yesterday, and they said that they took the video to a vet to ask them if this was in fact a seizure.
The vet made it very clear that if the dog (which in fact is said to be female) was acting like this only when asleep, then they most likely were NOT seizures.
Made me happy to know that!!
this is absolutely AWFUL.
i had a dog with epilepsy and he would do the exact same thing.
afterward he’d be disoriented and walk/run into walls.
that dog is having a seizure.
EPIC FAILBLOG FAIL.
If it was a seizure, it wouldn’t wake up from crashing into a wall.
I was going to post the same thing. My dog used to do that all the time. We also had to put him down because he was suffering from the seizures.
bAdummm!!! l-o-l
Awww, this is so adorable and yet so sad. What a horrible way to wake up!
This was pretty entertaining until he rammed into the wall…Poor doggy!
I would say that was most entertaining part.
I do feel bad for him. Such a way to wake up.
P.S. – thewilldog, you know that you can change your name to whatever you want as long as the email is the same right?
I think i fixed it.
There we go. Much better
Yup… looks good.
so yeah, that was when i fell out of my chair from laughing so hard.
Fake.
Oh yea, totally – can’t you see the strings tied to his legs?
Dumb
I know. His eyes are totally open the whole time. The whole thing’s staged.
I assume you’re one of those people who think the moon landing was staged by the people who shot JFK?
Detect sarcasm much?
I wonder how you train a dog to run into walls?
Feed your dog lots of metal.
Large electromagnet on other side of the wall.
Voila.
Option 2: Get smaller dog, throw smaller dog at the wall repeatedly in front of bigger dog.
*Note – only use this option if you have significant time on your hands
Time for many throws, or time to clean up the bits of smaller dog squished onto your wall…?
Yeah, there’s been a lot of dogs faking fails recently. It’s a big problem.
I agree – a staged publicity stunt for some European TV show! Look at the shadows on the wall, they’re all wrong!
…and thnx for the avatar-creating advice waaay up near the top of this thread!
What is that, by the way? It looks like a cross between John Lennon and Marcy.
Hahahahahahaha!
aww so cute!
Not so cute when he dreams about having to pee in the sleep…
Surely you ment håhåhåhåhåhå ?
Where does this belong?
(I found it at the bottom of the page)
Let’s tag along and see where it takes us
I think czuhc’s comment was for Norweigan Dude’s comment.
But so far, it hasn’t gone anywhere.
It may NOT go anywhere.
*turns to Czuhc’s comment*
You little good-for-nothing… Why don’t you get a job? You’re life’s going nowhere!
I wouldn’t go THAT far.
It’s time the little slacker started pulling his weight around here.
Wråf wråf
Øewåf
Ajix!
So there you are! Sorry people, this is from a very old conversation, dating from the time I had rough dealings with Norwegian pirates disguised as Santa Claus!
woah! sum one iz shure happie!
I’ve just discovered ths horrifying Lolcat comment. VMP, using this kind of language in normal conversation is strictly prohibited in these parts. OUT!
*marches VMP back to ICHC*
Fckin Brilliant =D x
not brilliant, but rather fuzzy. Nevertheless great.
Fuzzy=brilliant! You missed the concept entirely.
NOT funny!!!! Poor dog the person that clapped shot have their head smashed into the wall a few times see how funny it is then. Then again they’re stupid enough, they probably have had their head smashed into the wall a few times.
See? That’s how you do it. Now you try!
*films*
You could title it “When Care-Trolls Attack”
or: stupid wall, suddenly appeared in front of me, denied me of my dream.
And cut, print it, next scene! Wow, it’s going great.
hey, this is the most funny fail I saw for a long time. I will explain: most posts here are just sarcastic and cynical. For example, if an idiot pushes an old lady down the stairs is neither funny nor fail, it is just mean. But this one nobody does any harm, it is something it may happen to us all (yes, to humans, too) and this is why it is funny. I started laughing when the dog was running while lying, but when he got up and ran into the wall I exploded. Great! Give me more of this!
I actually saw this on CNN.com a few days ago. However, it’s still funny…
well, if you saw it twice then it is twice as funny, isn’t it?
who watches cnn, everything is photoshopped there
He’s watching to see if there are any more Nancy Grace fails.
Did he get the thing he was chasing is the question.
no, it it still there. behind the wall.
*snork*
I know already what a snork is. And maybe the dog (let’s call him Sleepy, OK?) was not chasing something, but was running away from something in his dream: running away from the man with the camera.
Chill, I was laughing. Your comment was funny.
Cheers, I hope so. I remember you, this is why i closed one eye when I wrote.
Remarks often made at my expense… guess I should try and shrug it off.
no, you are the trigger, and a trigger never know who is in front of the device.
Does not understand, so by me making the did he get it comment, your response, and avis compounded, is not a remark on myself?
yes, Sleepy was commenting your response compounded by Avis, not making the did “Left is right”. Knows, yes.
What I don’t understand what you are trying to say still. I don’t know if you are speaking above me on purpose or something but I’m just asking if your comment is meant as a joke about me.
more of a joke, yes, but not about you. Good hearted. Still smiling when thinking of Sleepy-
*Is relieved* Thanks for taking the time to dumb it down.
*pinches Emperor’s cheeks*
Mr Emperor sir, if I may?
Let it all flow around you and enjoy. People here are good natured, witty and like a bit of friendly banter. We come in peace!
The natural order of things is to poke and be poked as long as it’s all done with a tongue out.
*offers another bite of cookie*
*pokes jam with a tongue out*
You’ll poke your tongue out, kid!
Oh, and don’t try to stick your eyeball to a metal pole in the winter.
You’re not trying to poke me with your tongue are you BFF? That would just be ‘ton’silly!
Is this more magical advice hammy?
Emp, for the record that remark of mine was not at your expense. I thought Cosmos response was hysterical though.
No its fine Avis, you don’t have to worry. You earned your keep here so I heed your words, thanks for the consideration all the same.
*Smiles*
Consideration feels good for the soul.
She earned her KEEP?
Are you pondering what I’m pondering, Pinky?
I think so, but where would you get a scarf big enough for a giraffe?
Pinky: Russia! I’ve heard of that place! Isn’t it full of cheating, lying and backstabbing intrigue?
Brain: The Cold War is over, Pinky. Now Russia is a place of free-market capitalism.
Pinky: What’s free-market capitalism?
Brain: Erm… cheating, lying and backstabbing intrigue.
I was just describing the fact that she is a regular and needs not worry about a new person (aka me). Sheesh scrutinizing my words a little much there. They only want to be taken at face value.
Looks like this dog is having a seizure, in which case it is not funny but sad.
Wow, this isn’t depressing to anyone at all.
*SARCASM*
well, I hope not, dogs have strong skulls. And maybe the wall was just a dream. And maybe he did not wake up at all, but continued dreaming
yes, you are right. If it was a seizure, then it is indeed sad and not funny. See, how manipulateable we are, just give us a title and we believe what we see. And by the way: I am more of a cat lover, although I also like dogs, if they are big (I hate very small dogs)
Emp, for future reference NEVER interrupt Dragon and her Admiral. I’ve been dressed down for this myself. Even if you mean to be helpful, don’t.
(this post is at the bottom of the page for a reason)
*wonders where this will nest*
oops – sowwy
Right where it is.
*Pats out little flame still alit on shoulder* Yup I guess I learned that the hard way. Can someone lay those ground rules a bit better next time. My keister was set on fire because I didn’t know this unspoken rule. Before I o the unthinkable, does this apply to you and christopher as well?
Pretty much, except the punishment is a GLOWER.
I think you may have to watch out as well because you got between them as well. Or are their rules like free passes for regulars?
No.
So is hammy in danger, because I will offer my already singed carcass so that another Fber won’t suffer the same fate. I will be used as an example and a martyr for the hope of another future friend.
Too late, they kicked me and BFF out of the thread.
At least you didn’t get foomed. So all is ok then. Lesson learned the Pavlov way once again.
So…you’re saying that you didn’t know this thing that I explicitly stated in a conversation that you were a part of?? I honestly don’t know how to be clearer than to just come right out and say it…any ideas?
(Clickie name to be reminded of that conversation.)
Am I blind? Well either that or my LTML has returned. Well I guess I tunnel visioned to the pun run either that or I am retarded. Hoping for the prior. Well anyways I know now. My apologies If I ruined the mood for you two I was merely trying to create a nicer atmosphere.
I don’t know why but my comment is not appearing. Re-attaches. I guess I was blind. Because I swear that was never there, though I may have focused on the pun run more. Aside from that I learned my lesson and that is the important part. More than one interruption causes the two interrupting parties to be booted away. I am sorry if I spoiled it for you, was merely trying to set the atmosphere.
*offers warm and gooey cookie*
It was cold when I originally had it, but cooked to perfection in an unkown event.
Yup, and to go with the GLOWER is whatever Christopher decides to do to you.
Then to Avis and Christopher:
En ese caso, me disculpo a ambos usted por la interrupción. ¿Perdóneme?
*Holds out whole tray of fresh, hot cookies*
Hace algunas galletas frescas apenas para usted dos.
*Hopes she got that ^ right.*
You got no warning my friend. I got a hint beforehand so I was well informed.
BFF!!! Don’t compound the problem!! I don’t want to see you FOOMed!
Problem? What pr-AAAAAAH!!!
*disappears with burnt behind*
did anyone else notice that dog had a hard on at the end of the video?
i think it was more sleep humping…
A hard on? I’ve always just called it a tail.
ummmm… I did not. And y’know what else? I’m not even tempted to re-watch the video to see it.
Poor pup!
hey.. another video that was on todays big thing days ago… what do ya know?
Awwww, that was cute.
And on a related topic: Do you regular posters TRY to be 100 times more obnoxious than the average troll, or does it just come naturally? I’ve never seen such a large group of people try to impress each other with off-topic witticisms that just aren’t witty. At least the “first” posters generally only post once or twice for an entry.
“having a conversation” does not equal “try to impress each other”.
Oh yeah?? Check THIS out!
*flexes brain muscles*
I can bench press a 180 IQ with those babies!
*is impressed*
Yeah, it would be awesome if only “FIRST” people showed up, posted once or twice, and nobody else bothered. You can spell, so you could easily figure out not reading the comments would suit you better?
False dichotomy there, Kemo Sabe. One great alternative is this: Converse about the actual topic of the original post. Imagine that–commenting on the stuff that the comment board was set up to comment about!
The only reason I even noticed this is because the boards here are so very predictable:
1. someone comes along and says “first” followed by vehement denunciations of “first” posters and the same lame discussion about how annoying they are…
OR
1. someone comes along and doesn’t post “first” followed by numerous thanks to that person for not posting “first” and the same lame discussion about how annoying “first” posters are…
FOLLOWED BY
2. a long string of bad puns and silly word games…
THAT DEVOLVE INTO
3. smarmy/cutesy/”witty” conversations that make Seinfeld dialog sound like a dense philosophical treatise on the nature of suffering and death by comparison.
Of course, you’ll all do what you like. I just felt compelled to point out that for all the hollering about “first” posters that goes on here, most of the rest of the posts are equally lame–just longer.
“Converse about the actual topic of the original post…” Is this your idea of irony? Just wondering.
The video was cute. I said so. I sent it to my sister. I’d have typed a short personal narrative relevant to the original post–i.e., the video–but that obviously isn’t really the way things work here. In fact, if I followed the convention established by regular posters, I probably would have completely ignored the content of your message and tried to make some cute pun that compared “irony” to “ironing” or some such drivel.
As I said, you’ll do what you like. My motto is “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all. Unless people are being annoying ass hats.”
Ah yes…I saw how all the regulars were the ones who jumped into a community and started insulting you. Total, completely, and utter asshats, my goodness.
Personally, my motto is: if you can’t say something nice, sit next to me!
“…my goodness”? Wash your mouth out with soap this very minute young lady!
Oh, I’m so sorry…was I being an asshat??
*gets soap*
You never say anything that isn’t nice? What do you find funny? And again, if the tone here bothers you, why do you read the comments? The site doesn’t force you to click on them. You can even search only the G-rated ones, if you find ribbing and meanness offensive. There are many outs for you. If you don’t like the tone, or references, or conversations (and not everyone likes everything that goes on here, I assume), then just don’t worry yourself with them. I don’t blame you if you don’t like something, but just don’t bother with it!
If your motto is “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all”, why are you posting this drivel? This is a community of individuals that exercise their intelligence in many ways. We enjoy it. If we were limited to only “staying on topic”, there would be one post that said “A sleep walking dog ran into the wall. HA HA!!”.
You must be a sparkling light at gatherings.
The one thing you forgot to point out was that they are actually conversations much rather than just lines to annoy and incite. Generally if you have a conversation with friends that you have known for a while they will follow a certain repetitive format. That is the nature of any society FB being a prime example of a society. So yes patterns do appear, but all things in life have a specific pattern that they are accustomed to and comfortable with. That is life, these patterns change with time, maybe if people heed your voiced denonciations enough you may cause the repetitiveness to stop. Though that means you are inspiring chaos, nothing to be truly proud of.
No offense, but if FB is truly a “prime” example of a society these days, then I need to make preparations to off myself and have done with it.
And no, I’m not trying to inspire anarchy (lol). All I’d like to see is relevant, minimally intelligent conversation once in a while. Since all I’m going to get is the indignant defensive responses of guilty parties, I think I’ll cut my losses and move on. Good day!
Guilty parties, hardly. I am new here I cannot be considered to have been part of repetition since I added a new aspect. Though any collection of people with a similar goal in mind. A society is a group of humans characterized by patterns of relationships between individuals that share a distinctive culture and/or institutions. Which defends my prime example statement. Ignorance may be bliss but you cannot always run from the truth.
Seriously, it’s a dog running headlong into a wall. 600 posts about that would be either excruciating or from a canine psychology site.
Oscar Wilde and James McNeill Whistler were considered ” “prime” example of a society” in their day and would have no doubt enjoyed trying to keep up here.
Of the two options that you have presented yourself, I recommend A.
Oooh…can you imagine punning with Oscar Wilde?? I would have soooo loved that.
…Though I’d have to seriously brush up on my Latin.
Oscar Wilde and most of his contemporaries would put us all to shame. But it would be fun to try.
Oh, I think there are a few here…a VERY few…who could keep up with them.
…Though I’m not saying I’m one of them. Wilde would put me to shame right quick, I have no doubt.
Ah, but the challenge. The delightful challenge.
It would have been fun. To watch – I don’t think I’d have stood a chance.
Can you imagine their troll stomping abilities? Insulted and never know that it happened! If they were still about you couldn’t get them off of this site.
Possibly on the Latin, Dragon, but I still believe you would be a worthy contender to his wit! Pun-wise, that would be an exchange I would love to see.
Oh, good grief, Charlie Brown! I never changed my name back after “Captain Kangaroo fan”!
On that note, would you please, Dragon, respond to the Admiral for me ^^^ way up there. He thanked me for remembering Captain Kangaroo. Au contrare (sorry if that is wrong – I never took French), it is I who must thank him! His comment yesterday (re: Mister Moose and the ping pong alls) dished up memories that had long ago been forgotten. Afterwards, I went searching on YouTube, and ran across a plethora of them! Captain Kangaroo, Dancing Bear, Mr. GreenJeans, Kukla, Fran & Ollie – - it all came rushing back! It was a brief peek back into the childhood I had forgotten. I am grateful for the look back.
You are very welcome Judy. I’m glad it brought back fond memories for you!
Hee! It’s not necessary to use me as an intermediary, obviously!
And, since I was also raised on Captain Kangaroo, I enjoyed the trip down memory lane as well. *smooch*
Sorry, I was catching up on the fails today, and although I noticed you were still posting this time of the day, I hadn’t seen anything from the Adm. for hours.
P.S.: Remember Beany & Cecil???? That cracked me up yesterday when I ran across YouTube videos of that!!!!
I still find it hard to believe that Captain Kangaroo was ever a Marine. I like how to him we were always children, never kids. A gentle show with a gentle man.
Admiral! You’re on! Tell me, if you recall, did the grandfather clock on Captain Kangaroo have a name ? Or was it just “Grandfather Clock”? I could not find any clips that had the clock interacting with the Captain, but I do remember that, when he talked, his facial features moved.
Hee! I think it was just named Grandfather Clock!
Yup. That was his name.
*revs up memory machine*
OK, for those of us who are mid-late 50’s/early 60’s babes, who remembers:
GI Joe /Iwo Jima set?
Marx Toys lithographed tin dollhouses?
Marx Toys construction trucks?
Johnny West playsets?
Gumby & Pokey?
I had a Gumby and Pokey and was more into Jonny Quest than Johnny West.
Ooh, I’m a little too young for those. I played with Lincoln Logs, Tinker Toys, Fisher Price toys and my absolute favorite…the Lite Brite!
I got quite a shock from a Lite Brite when I was 5. It was, of course my own damn fault. I wanted to see it blink.
How about the Man From U.N.C.L.E. attache case with a real camera and periscope pistol.
Almost forgot Snippy Scissors.
Thanks for making me feel lovely 7 minutes before my 30th birthday. I love you guys.
Or, you know, like 5 minutes.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DILLY!!!
We love you, too.
*brings out Failcake*
*puts 30 candles on it*
Here…let me light these for you…
*FOOOOM!!*
…Ummm…let’s have pie instead.
Coyote! Man from U.N.C.L.E. – can you believe “Ilya Kuriakin” (sp?) is now “Ducky” on NCIS? And, believe it or not – - Robert Vaughan is now (among other things, hopefully), doing commercials for a local law firm in nearby Weirton, West Virginia???? I mean, really, how the heck do you get “The Man Fron U.N.C.L.E.” to be your spokesperson! Totally cool!
(P.S.: “Snippy Scissors?” Sorry, no recollection.)
It’s your birthday? *pops corks and steals a smooch and brings out the cake*
Judy-Ducky is the character that I most relate to. When I saw that he drives a car that I have lusting after for years (a Morgan) that sealed it.
You would have to be in your very late forties or early fifties to know about Snippy Scissors. They were plug-in scissors with vibrating blades for saftey. They worked great. Little four year old coyote spent hours sitting on the floor slicing up paper for no apparent use. No telling how many children were shocked.
Yay, Dragon, I like pie so much better!
Thanks. Can you guys give me some turning 30 advice? I’m feeling a little ugh.
Happy Birthday Dilly. *Presents birthday cupcake*
Thirty means that you have finally shed the last of the dreadful teens. Yes, it takes a decade to do that. You have a better handle on what is important in life.
It has been said that up to thirty you have the face you were born with. After that it is what you make of it. If you have lead a life of seeing life in a good light and been one who truly enjoys just being, your face will show this as beauty. As far as I know you from here, your face will show this.
Your confidence in yourself is now based in fact and not hopes.
The list goes on. Roughly for the length of a lifetime.
Enjoy existing.
Happy birthday.
My GAWD I’ve loved my thirties. Best. Decade. Ever. I’ve done more things, had more fun, and been able to appreciate it more fully than I ever could in my twenties. I have fewer insecurities, more accomplishments, more stable friendships, and MUCH better taste in everything, from food to furniture to men.
Relax, darlin’. You’re about to have the time of your life.
I still feel adolescent sometimes:) I’m happy to hear it gets better!
I do, too…but it gets more fun in your thirties.
*hug and smooch*
One never stops feeling adolescent on occasion.
What are you going to do, eh? Turn into a bear and eat us all up?
I’ve just realised it’s 20 past midnight. I shall now go to bed. ‘night, all!
*tries to store in memory that BFF is 8 hours ahead of FB time…and I’m 3…or am I 3 hours behind?*
*checks fail just posted*
*3 hours ahead. Fer-shure”
*which makes it only 10:56 here. Time for another beer!*
Bartender? Abstract? Richard? Can I get some service here????
I really love this website, but why do you all just spam the comments section with this crap? Nobody even comments on the vids/pics. At least nobody does “First!” anymore. That being said, I’m sure that dog feels like a total ass!
A sleep walking dog hit his head. HA HA.
Happy now? Learn what the Failblog community is about.
This is a more involved type of troll bothering us, I feel a bit taken, like I fell for it above. I think I might not pay attention in the future.
Indeed. I think they are just whiners who don’t have the mental capacity to keep up with us, so they request a “dumbing down” of the blog so they don’t feel quite as inadequate.
My students request the same thing of my assignments and my standards. I say “no” to them, too.
“Tried to make me let them be stupid, and I said NO NO NO!”
Dragon Meadhouse
Say what you will, but I feel like you guys are the ones who are “dumbing down” this site with your stupid talk about puns and harassing of other people. Do none of you work, or do you just sit here hitting refresh so you can be the first to snap off a witty comeback?
I have a hard time believing that you actually teach other human beings after seeing how much time you spend on such a website. Do you show your students what you find on this website to encourage them to stay in school?
I’m sure the dog doesn’t really care one way or the other.
FIRST
HELL YEAH YOU ARE
Hehe…so funny! My dog does that too, but he’s never ran into a wall
God that was hilarious. I stand by my opinion that dogs are fucking stupid, and cats rule. I love all animals, just prefer cats and birds over dogs.
Though dogs seem to be more loyal. Personal experience here as couple cats disappear weeks on end and return later wanting to be fed. At least my dogs have stood by us all the time. I just prefer dogs though I have no reservations against the other house pet varieties. Bonus story a cat once put its nail through my finger to the nail on the other side when I was 5.
Thats… great… *ehHem*… i actually own a couple of canadians. very loyal. kinda stupid. cute when they fight though.
You own players from montreal’s hockey team grats millionaire.
It’s a fail, but that doesn’t stop me from feeling bad for that doggie D: poor thing :/
This is hysterical!
However, I would have loved to see a person do this. I love stupid people.
http://www.eatabigone.wordpress.com
Oh gods – I really shouldn’t have laughed nearly as hard as that as I did. I love dogs. And yet… *starts laughing all over again*
Clearly I am a bad, bad person.
This is so sad. This IS a classic example of a dog having a seizure. It’s one thing to possibly tape this for your veterinarian to see but to release it for “humor” is such a cruel abusive act. One can only hope this individual thought enough of this dog to seek medical attention for it and not continue to make it a laughing matter. I am disappointed FAILED or anyone else supports this.
omg you retard its just having an insane nightmare! can’t you see it’s running in it’s sleep? the legs are meeting each other in the same place when it’s actually running. shut the fuck up you hippie piece of crack smoking shit
wtf? how can you argue that it’s not a seizure? are you a veterinarian? I seriously doubt it. I’ve working as a veterinarians asst for 10 years. This dog IS having a seizure. I’d bet my life, house, job and family on it. I SWEAR TO GOD, this is a canine grand-mal seizure.
Sorry, it is not. Have you ever seen a dog WALK during seizures?
During seizures, muscles spasm INVOLUNTARILY, and it’s not possible for the animal to walk, let alone RUN, which this dog does – and seizures don’t “just end” when you crash into a wall.
There are quite large numbers of dogs that show up at clinics everywhere after injuring themselves in their sleep – it’s possible for dogs to sleepwalk. Also, to fully diagnose a seizure, you would have to hook the animal up to machines, so how you can say – as an vet’s assistant with 10 years of experience who must KNOW what a dog is capable of in its sleep – that this is a seizure just by looking at a video is beyond me.
I’ve worked with animals all my life and became a vet 5 years ago, specializing in canines and mustelids.
Just because this, edited, video may not seem like a dog having a seizure to you, others have in fact seen the whole tape, and it is a dog seizure. Now, as a professional, I would hope that you would also know that just because humans have uncontrolled muscle spasms, doesn’t mean animals don’t. And you became a vet 5 years ago, have you picked up a book since? Or gone on any vet websites, because this issue has been addresses, and it is a seizure.
awwwwww……..
Poor puppers
FIRTS!!!!!!
Apparently, they’ll call anything a fail now.
Ah-dur-hur-hur! Look at that dog running in place in his sleep, he fails at sleep walking! Durp-durp-durp!
and you think that when you roll out of bed in your sleep your having a wild dream
This video just won the internets
Gravatar test
First!!
Oh dear..
hahaha
great
Everyone! Touch my moomin!
If you watch all the dog’s videos on youtube, it is painful clear this dog is having grand mal seizures, and the stupid owner is too much of am idiot to realize it, too busy reading all the giggles from people who don’t know any better. Not funny, not cute.
Are you aware of what a dog is capable of in its sleep?
As a vet specializing in canines, I am… and this dog is DREAMING. Dogs cannot stand up, let alone RUN during seizures…
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL XDD
POOR LIL DOG ROFL
Looks more like a seizure, which is hardly funny. I hope they get that poor dog to the vet just to be sure.
Wow, that was funny. He probably IS chasing a lady-dog. What a way to wake up. Reminds me a lot of my dog.
The REAL question is, why is somebody randomly taping their dog?
i laughed so much i peed a little
Fail because it’s a dog.
WTF?? I posted it about 1 week ago!
This dog is having a grand mal seizure. I’ve worked in a vet’s office for almost 10 years and seen enough of them to know. This is just sad and shouldn’t be on here.
This dog is having a seizure. Any one who’s ever seen a canine grand-mal seizure can verify. This is just sad.
Stop spamming a lie.
THE DOG IS DREAMING. NO ANIMALS CAN WALK DURING SEIZURES AS IT’S LIKE GETTING ZAPPED REPEATEDLY WITH AN ELECTRIC CURRENT.
There’s a reason why everyone with an epilepsy attack falls over, and it goes for canines too.
I’ve seen plenty of grand mal seizures in my office, and this isn’t it.
oh really? I think you’re a liar. I JUST HAD MY DOG PUT TO SLEEP. he drank anti-freeze and due to renal failure, started having seizures JUST LIKE THIS!!!!!! Stop acting like you’re the ‘canine seizure’ expert. If you were, you’d know there are MANY type of canine seizures. They don’t all look alike!!!! Idiot.
Oh, so we’re stuck at namecalling now? You sure you’re old enough to have 10+ years of vet. assistant experience? Just asking.
I’m not a seizure expert, but it’s common veterinary knowledge that a seizure – NO MATTER THE TYPE – is simply the brain that sends out a storm of electronic signals that make the muscles spasm UNCONTROLLABLY. “Uncontrollably” means that the animal has no control over its limbs, right? So it shouldn’t be able to stand up or run, correct? Well, look at what THIS pooch does!
Was your dog walking during his/her seizures? Because then, s/he’s the only dog in history that’s ever done that.
actually yes, dogs CAN stand up, bark and even run during seizures. The reason I’m ‘name-calling’ is because this exact behavior caused me a lot of pain and suffering and caused my dog death…. And still, people want to argue that it’s not a seizure.
JUST DO SOME RESEARCH before calling ME a liar! please?
If they stand up and bark, then it’s not classified as a seizure, but abnormal behavior. Seizures are when the brain sends electronic signals to the muscles so they move uncontrollably, and it still can’t be stopped by a blow to the head such as this unless it renders the animal unconscious. This however may be due to a language barrier. I’m Danish, and in Denmark, there’s a huge difference between “abnormal behavior” (sudden change in character, sudden biting/uncontrollable barking/etc) and “seizure” (uncontrollable spasms), and I’ve never heard that they should be classed together as just simply “seizures” in English even after working in the UK and Canada, but I might be wrong.
I have done my research or I would’ve never gotten my degree.
However, I’m sorry for your loss – I’ve lost quite a few pets to conditions that include seizures too, and it’s horrible to watch. But just because something reminds you of a seizure, it might not be – all I see in this video as a vet is typical, but exaggerrated canine sleeping behavior. However, if it upsets you because it reminds you of the seizures that your dog had, you’re also more likely to put it in the seizure category simply because that’s what it reminds you of.
Types of Seizures
Partial: This type of seizure only affects a small portion of the brain, so a loss of physical control would only be seen in specific parts of the body.
General: A general seizure involves the entire brain, therefore the entire body would display physical signs of the seizure.
Psychomotor: THIS TYPE OF SEIZURE IS is distinctly different from the types mentioned above. The outward signs are predominantly behavioral, such as BARKING and whining for no apparent reason, walking in circles or unusually aggressive behavior. A psychomotor seizure can sometimes be a warning signal that a partial or general seizure is on the way.
There are additional classifications for canine seizures depending on their source.
These include:
Primary: This classification is used when no actual cause of the abnormal brain activity can be diagnosed.
Secondary: This classification is used when there is an identifiable abnormality in the brain.
Reactive: This type of seizure happens when an essential healthy brain is exposed to outside forces such as toxins and accompanying illnesses.
The psychomotoric type seizures is what we classify as “abnormal behavior” – this also happens when a dog has rabies and suddenly becomes aggressive, etc.
However, this is not a psychomotoric seizure – psychomotoric seizures/abnrma behavior is random and has no purpose, whereas this dog had a purpose – to catch its prey (which unfortunately was imaginary and suddenly replaced by a wall
). There really ARE dogs that sleepwalk – it’s just a more extreme version of barking/kicking their legs in their sleep, after all.
If you still claim this is a seizure, we’ll just have to agree to disagree.
omg… i think the dog was horny, very end of video = HARDCORE BONER. dayum.
I’m sorry to have to tell you this, but tails can’t have boners.
That there is th doggie’s tail, not its pee-pee.
*the
Typing fail.
look, i posted!
Right!
Go get it, boy!
Is it just me or did anyone else see that dog has an erection… would that be a sex fail too?
Whatever. Epic Sleep Walking WIN.
Dogs are like retarded people.
Worst animal EVER.
At 1st i was like “he’s havin a seizure! why the HEAK DOSENT ANYONE HELP HIM!”
I have NEVER seen anything that funny before <3 love
Are you sure he wasnt just having a seizure?
did anyone else besides me notice the dog had a boner at the end of the vid?
I think that ‘boner’ was its tail.
my dog doez dat! Itz helza funny
That was awesome!
Looks like the dog is having a night terror.
I like his penis.
You do realize that dog is having a full blown seazure and that it could have died…. correct? It wasn’t sleep walking.
Lol do you see the dick of the dog?
OMG TOTAL SLEEPWALKING WIN!
Check that dog for a brain tumor…
hmm so dogs also get boners while dreaming
Here ya go!
Hey! Look at the dog at the end of the video. I think he was doing a…strange kind of dream haha (he has 3 back legs)
Penis!
LOL! Dog got a boner when he woke up! WET DREAMS FTW!
dude i don’t know if anyone noticed, but this should be renamed and put under mature content…. That dog is not sleep WALKING it is well …uhhh… well last i checked dogs didn’t have three back legs *points to the final seconds of the clip*
As I said to another dude it’s tail was between his leg, dogs do that when scared, hurt or when they are thinking.
haha and it runs into the wall. Hilarious!!!
His dick was sticking out…
You remind me of the babe.
That little thing between his legs is not his DICK it’s his TAIL!
those who say it’s his dick then you have been qualified to an
EPIC FAIL!
Oh sweet mother of god it hurts to laugh!
i even wee’d a little
and still laughing now
OMG!!
lol that has gotta hurt!
awww so cute, and so retarded
Amazing how most of these comments are people trying to be cute and have nothing to do with the fail they are commenting on.
that poor dog has night terrors, if it’s not given proper treatment, it could die.
THAT IS WIN!!!
hahaha very funny
I love finding comments at the bottom of the page! You never know where they’ll take you!
(if anywhere)
*bump*