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» 194 Failures in Communication
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Cheezburger Network Blog
The best rapes in town!
haha!
Classic…
Ask for our special weekly rapes.
I subscribe daily!
Wow! I don’t see why this is a fail. This company rules! We bought a beach side house from them for an amazing 60,000 dollars! Only problem was that they would come to our house every month, and talk to my mommy about stuff i didnt understand. Then my mommy would start screaming and hitting them. But I still loved it!
Did they touch you innapropiately?
Was it a N**ger house?
Was your realtor’s name Scott Campbell?
Is a realtor the same thing as an estate agent?
Yes, indeedy.
Raper Realty
If you don’t call the cops, I guess we can let you stay.
I’m a rapist…
And i jumped 40 feet to the ground using a garbage bag as a parachute on my website.
but this tops everything..
No, they just gave me big lollipops!
They’re located in North Carolina, and their area code is 828.
When you call, ask the Realtor to legally change his surname. That’ll be good for business.
Just for you!
Just for Jews?
Death to all Juice!
Death to all Bruce
Wayne
America will go to heal!
and the other one involved in the raping.
Thank god you are back darling, you were missed sorely a few fails ago.
Aw, thanks!
.
I’m having problems with my rental house and the current tenants. Rental houses are great…on paper. In reality, they’re a pain in the butt!
There is a really tasteless joke in that comment somewhere, I just know it.
Are they a pain the the butt like the potato?
.
That wasn’t tasteless…was it?
I find potatoes to be delicious, with proper preparation and condiments
Just watch out for the ones that taste like poo.
pootatoes!
i knew a guy named jeremy raper in high school.
“If they are a pain in the butt, you know you are doing it wrong”?
My name is Ryan Raper… Does this mean I fail?
Always has vacancy!
A good realtor fills vacancies rapidly and aggressively.
Do they ever do any promotion rapes? you know, two for price of one or something?
Yeah! BYOV [Bring your own victim]-Parties
Yeah, take a friend and get your first victim for free!
All you can rape on Tuesdays.
At the spankme building – where they offer a free Doucheeburger per musical raper!
At the spankme building – where they offer a free douchee burger per musical raper – for only 500 yen!
Damn failblog monster – ate my first comment. Grr. Ingnore the first one.
No. I’d prefer to ignore your second one. If you would like me to ignore the first one you must fill out form 8a3b, get it stamped 12 times and return t it by post to your local council. Thank you
Let’s all ignore the second one, that will show him!
Every home comes with a deep well in the cellar.
Hey your right! Our house has one! I looked down the hole though, i just see something sticky, but no water. Maybe i can drink this…
it puts the lotion on its skin
*waits for the hose*
*hands Mookie a rose*
Oh. Wait.
Fritzl approves.
Ouch, alter Ösi.
Das dürfte die übelste Beleidigung sein, die ich je gehört habe! Ich bin definitiv KEIN Ösi! Du… Du… Bayer!
Ich verstehe nicht, die Beleidigung.
I’m looking for the beastiality hotel, anyone know where that is?
Go down incest road, pass necrophilia mansion and you’re there.
You have to take back roads the whole way.
That pun was really forced…
Thinking about bestiality? Maybe it’s time to take the bull by the horns.
…and ride it all night!
Or, if you like baa-aa-aaad boys, there’s this criminal goat you might be interested in…
Should I be offended right now or something? Well, is it actual bestiality, when the goat’s an enchanted guy?
Eeeerm… Let’s settle with sodomy and put a lid on that discussion….
It’s near the milf storage
Errm.. It’s not that much of a fail, isn’t the actual word “RAPIST” ?
you know better :S
Trying to think of a legal business, where that company name would not be a fail. But I fail.
You have a rapist wit.
He rapes wits???
*huddles wits together*
*stands in front of them like a body guard*
Let’s see him get them now! Hah!
I’d be really careful there – I think Mookie said that the wit was the rapist and you have them all lined up behind you… 8-|
Metaphorically speaking, doesn’t that name apply to all realtors?
and lawyers?
And insurance providers?
And bankers?
And politicians.
and rapers.
And sword fighters.
And people who wrap stuff for you….wait, what?
And Eminem and Dr. Dre ….wait, what?
*gives berg the evil death stare*
Oh NO! not the evil death stare!
At least berg didn’t list engineers. He might have gotten the ‘fist of death’.
Indeed.
Wow, engineers and lawyers vilified in the same thread… There go all my friends…
You have friends? I thought you were a lawyer?
I kid, I kid, I jest I jest.
You know I am your “friend.” Oh, and your February payment is late.
That’s because I was not completely satisifed with the services you provided.
You satisfaction is all over my couch.
Did Blue forget to use his Shamwow again
No, he re-used it. Blech.
That would be an interesting infomercial for shamwow.
You jest what?
Notice no computer programmers where mentioned?
But where are telemarketers?
At the Billy Mays Workshop. You didn’t see the banner ad?
Telemarketers are just collection agents that dont have the balls to be collection agents.
They were eaten by the maggots…
well well. aren’t we a little sensitive…
now now. it’s ok.
everyone has a right to express themselves without feeling bullied by offended lawyers.
please don’t try to intimidate me. I wouldn’t want to be forced to use Kyle’s dad.
Did you just threaten me with a fictional TV character?
I’m not saying one more word until Mr. Broflovski gets here.
Ooookay then. *pats berg on the head* I’ll just leave you alone.
epic fail!
Nope. Statistically, nine of ten people enjoy gang rape
now that is just so twisted, ain’t it?
Those are the nine who are raping the tenth, right?
Ahh… every home comes free with a pedo bear wielding an E.T. finger.
They get the job done even if you don’t like it (or want it).
and they’ll tell you that you were asking for it.
And the folks in the religion of peace will stone you for it
Everybody must get stoned…
Yay!
*does inhale*
*sign, sign, pass* Ear.
Don’t just sit there, puff, puff, give man!
*puff, puff, pass*
*giggles*
*eats*
Mmmm…. stale Cheerios and flat diet Coke. This is the best ever…
*puff, puff… pass*
There’s such thing as diet cocaine? Wow man this must be some good shit.
*puff, puff* pass.
*giggle-snort*
Man I got da munchies…
Where’s DTI with the cookies when you need them?
Diana…! Wherefore art though, Diana?
*does stare at the sun*
*offers sunglasses to Arthur and WhoaNellie*
You both might need them.
Why? Is there an eclipse going on?
Y’know it’s not the fact that they rape you that bothers me so much as the lack of cuddling there at the end.
…grape? *innocent*
Cherry? *very innocent*
Cherry Bomb? *not innocent at all*
Where’d my cherry go? *lost innocence*
Linda Blair has it. *born innocent*
She only likes pea soup. *Innocence, it’s all you ever pleaded*
Tentacle grape?
Oh God. I made the mistake of Googling that. Turns out it’s real:
“Tentacle Grape is everything I love about hentai, but with a sweet grapey taste that makes it seem like everything’s going to be okay.”
hello
is there anybody in there?
i cant hear you
Thanks for the earworm, doosh.
That’s what I’m here for
I’m sure you’ve heard this before, but… wrong hole.
My bad, too many to choose from.
Just nod if you can hear me
Is there anyone at home…
I’ll go check…
*facepalm*
Forgot to change me name back….crap.
that hurt!
How many times do we have to tell you not to run with sharp objects WGM2?
123218482748921 times
i think that was the 123218482737890 th time
lalalalalala…
Come on, now.
I hear youre feeling down.
Well I can ease your pain,
Get you on your feet again.
Numb feeling starting………
hello i came to show you house or rape you lol
*subtracts one eagle*
Try again.
lol.
wonder what a good opening line would be for the realator
Rapers don’t need no stinkin’ pickup lines!
the homes come with those trapdoor sex-basements?
http://www.lowbrowsophisticate.com/category/jack-grabber
The sad part is that Raper is probrably the guys last name. “Hello my name is Guy Raper and this is my partner Peter File, we are here to do an interior inspection.”
love your name…a
I actually went to college with a guy named Jeremy Raper. He was from Australia, not that I think that means anything.
I lol’d
As opposed to Robert Stalker….
love your name.
nest fail.
But I didn’t see a bird on that fail!
That was tweet of you to reply to him.
It was a feather in his cap.
Let’s all try not to get in a flap about it.
Hey, I’m just winging it here.
Maybe we can rook Avis into helping us out.
Oh, I’m nothing to crow about.
I soar what you did there.
Egrets…we’ve had a few
Give them a call…
(828) 835-7334
Free rape quotes. Actually pretty reasonable, but thats what you would expect out in the boonies.
I don’t know if the name Raper naturally leads one to real estate, but we have a realty in Atlanta named Morris and Raper.
And in a nearby city of Macon, a lot of development is done by a company called Ramsbottom.
God forbid, if those Raper parts with Morris and join forces with Ramsbottom…
Ramsbottom Raper.
Rape her realtor? But I hardly know her realtor!
i’m sorry pls kill me now
You say FAIL. I say TRUTH.
You do have a point there.
Scary, I think I would run
http://www.be-anonymous.us.tc
Truth in Advertising Win!
Depends on whether you’re the buyer or seller. If you’ve got the money to buy, you can get a great deal right now. I’d buy if I had a bit more job security…
Uhh, rapist is the correct term for someone who rapes, Raper means nothing…
Why so defensive about what rapers are called?
There’s a crapload of Tom Raper RV billboards in Indiana
Yeah, I’ve seen those too. I don’t remember where in Indiana, I was in a Grayhound bus heading home from Virginia, but all I can remember thinking is “Where’s a camera when you need one?”
They may call themselves Raper Realty, but do they have enough experience in the field? If I did business with them only to find out they’re a by-the-seat-of-your-pants organization, I’d feel violated.
I cannot understand why the “Testimonial Fail” on this page is not on the front page:
http://failblog.org/vote/page/11/
Raper Realty Inc, out of NC. I heard they better watch out, they’re being closely watched by Whacker Holdings, LLC.
Is it just me or does the stylized ‘RR’ look like a red-hatted bishop? They’re not saying bishops are rapers are they??
That’s a job best left to the priests.
I believe it’s pronounced in French… “Rapé”
Sadly no. “Raper” is pronounced just like it looks. When I get sales calls people usually try to be polite and misprounounce it as “wrapper”. According to my father it’s some variant of “Roper”.
Omg I love his billboards!! My favorite is TOM RAPER — FEEL RIGHT AT HOME!
I like the “Raper Country” one. Uggh!
Personally, I like “Raper’s Rent-To-Own”.
anal Raper?
Anal Raper?
Sadly enough, in Asian countries, lots of idiots say raper when they mean rapper.
The same countries that translate “Songs in A Minor” as “Songs from the voice of an underage”
you cant help your last name
but maybe they could have made something up…
“I AM SO MOT A RAPER!”
Dale Doback
Step Brothers
OMG the first Fail from my town. HaHa!!!!!
LMAO, I actually have a teacher with that last name. Needless to say, my parents were weary of her at first, HaHa.
Raper is a very common name on the west-coast.
Yes! Tom Raper! I’ve seen those, too. They’re all over the place in Indiana or Ohio, idk which.
isn’t a person who rapes called rapist not raper…
What can I do to penetrate you in this new house today???
Testing 1, 2, 3