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Cheezburger Network Blog
First
I wish I had thought of that.
He always struggles to find a street pole big enough to piss on.
This is funny because a gigantic crane fell over and hit a house. Why was there such a huge crane in a neighborhood? That question adds funny to the scene, it does not take funny away from the situation.
Prime example of thinking too much into the fail right here.
…and of stealing the first sentence! Funnyboi won’t be pleased!
Holy shit, for the first time I’m amazed by a failblog picture
Holy shit, for the first time I’m amazed by a maildog pitcher
Why are you talking to yourself? It’s not gonna work…
Same email address=same avatar
You is right! Notice how he also replied eactly one minutte after
True as night. Noticed how he defiled by accidenty the avatar.
in soviet russia, right is YOU!
I don’t talk to myself.
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hey hey hey! another knight! what country are you from?
*does not expect reply due to posting way late*
Maybe they were fixing another house and when they went to hit the other house they got that house.
Snorff urg snorgle snooot smurg
That says shut up, but I figured you might not understand the advanced English here.
Pete’s Dragon? smork smork smork!
This is the ultimate fail. Crane driver – you fail !!!!!
“It doesn’t seem physically possible!”
Who was the one you quoted? Bill Clinton?
Tub girl?
From season 1 of “Red vs Blue”.
Btw,
BREAK-DANCING CRANE FTW!!
Thats because it is not.
Of course it’s possible it would just take a huge amount of weight
More than likely a fibreglass swimming pool was being lifted into the backyard. Not a great deal of weight but at full jib and probably a flat angle. More than enough to tip a relatively light crane like that.
exactly – they were probably lowering the huge fat dude in the previous Fail photo into his bathtub or something, and the crane just couldn’t handle the amount of weight at that trajectory.
the good news is, the crane landed on bigboi, caused him to defecate about 300 lbs. of solid waste, and he’s now in line to become the next Jared at Subway.
it doesnt even take a huge amount of weight, the tires on those particular boom trucks even though extremely heavy are no where near as heavy as steel tracks. its a relatively light rig, even with the outriggers you would be surprised at how little weight it can lift, and the lower the angle the more likely it is to tip over. looks like they were either trying to get something over the house due to lack of rear access, or they were trying to install an air conditioner. even though thats anywhere from a 15-30 ton crane, its lifting capacity is nowhere near that especially if you are trying to achieve distance instead of height.
Not necessarily a huge amount of weight. See how far the boom
is extended? Leverage and a dose of weight. And a smidgeon of
stupid.
crane operator has the brace legs on the wrong side. indeed very possible when you’re an idiot.
it is possible, it just have to be lifting a heavy load far from it’s center of gravity, damn, too far.
Swedish Chef? Bork bork bork!
The one you love? Pork pork pork!
*snork snork snork*
*snark snark snark*? Is this the correct usage?
Mindy’s boyfriend? Mork Mork Mork!
SECOND. EVREYBODY THA POSTS AFTER ME IS A GAY NOOB
You do know that words typed by trolls mean nothing whatsoever? Ergo, your statement is complete and utter bullsh*t and will be ignored by everyone with a brain.
And the fact that YOU did not ignore it means what exactly?
PARADOX!
Paradox? How’s the cat, Mr Wolf?
TRANSFORM….EH AH OOO AH AH
He did ignore it, where “it” refers to the “Everyone who posts after me…”
If you want to redefine “it” to mean “the fact that the troll posted at all”, that’s your lookout.
Logic FAIL.
No, champ. It’s a wordplay on a combination of his name and a famous quantam physics paradox. Google it.
Um, ‘champ’, I was talking to M. Now maybe there’s a correlation between the name “M” and the idea of not ignoring things that everyone in left craptionia or wherever the h3ll you come from is familiar with, but out here in civilization it obviously isn’t as well known.
You’re a tooooooooollbaaaagg
Oh, wait! I almost forgot!
*TAZES*
Check
*CAGES*
Check
I got another one Bondfan!
Good! You’re coming on well, bassplaya!
Now, I’ll take over from here.
*shoves STFUNOOB into cage*
Boggy gets yet another toy!
Audience + Anonymity = JERK WAD
Thanks! I needed a troll like you to try out my mecha’s new & improved mega-tazers!! I just have to make sure to leave something for Boggy to play with.
Anyone wants to do the honors? *offers keys*
Would you like to sign the petition?
http://failblog.org/2009/02/21/crane-fail-4/?cp=all#comment-293385
Ah, I am not allowed to taze, I am a worse troll than you.
Neither would I want tazing.
I would just steal your mom.
Not his dad?
Orly?
ROTFL
bitchin wheelie
First!
*tazes both gnah and Mani and boots into FAIL BOG monster cage*
Boggy’s first toys of the day!
Fail.
I can see what that yellow crane had for lunch.
Did it give it gas?
I think it might’ve followed through.
And by “it might’ve followed through” I mean !@^#
Oh really? By “it might’ve followed through” I meant “it might’ve dropped a little hydraulic fluid on the driveway when the gas came out”.
When he said to renovate the house, I don’t think this is what he meant.
Extreme Makeover: Deconstruction Edition
Extreme Flipover: Crane Edition.
Extreme hangover: Where the f*ck are my brains Edition
Extreme Leftovers: Why the hell did I eat so much??? Edition
Extreme Takeover: Hitler Edition
Extreme Layover: Bangkok Airport Edition.
Extreme Bendover: I’ll show you a crane
Extreme Manhole Cover: I’ll show you a pothole.
Extreme Passover: Ultimate Seder Edition.
Extreme Christianity: I’ll show you a well hung God.
Extreme Christianity II: Experience the “Second Coming”
Extreme P0rnography: The mulitple coming.
Extreme typo misread: The mullet people coming.
Extreme Bestiality: Beauty and the Beast
pornography nested in Christianity win
Extreme apathy: That’s it, I’m going.
oh my
All that crane’s blood was pumped into it’s boom – poor thing wasn’t thinking right.
From the belly side of the crane, I would think it’s a female.
Oh, yeah. You can see the string if you look closely.
Then it’s a public decency fail too. She should wear underwear!
I know you padded in quietly, but I think you’re winging it now.
Oh ewww! Very unsanitary pun run!
In this case I consider myself lucky for not understanding it.
Nevermind, the pun-runs tend to come in cycles.
They do tend to run periodically.
All the menses participate.
Who made this bloody mess? *gets a napkin*
This is a GREAT pun-run.
*standing ovulation*
Whats a pun? *Asks for a demenstration.*
Ack… demenstruation.
… Refuses to face THAT particular bukkit.
Oh the mammaries of all the great pun runs.
You can never stop the pun runs. Resistance is fertile.
Beware of the men who pause pun runs.
They’ll just find a way to screw it up, as sperm usual.
Egg zack ly.
*gets dizzy*
Oooh…the womb is spinning…
I think you ovary exterted yourself. Sit down and have some oj.
Is there anything on the tubes?
Not really. I’m hoping to fall upon something good.
I can’t take it anymore. Zygotta get away from this thread!
Come on hammy, sure you aren’t gamete for more?
Vagtastic i have never been so entertained at a pun run this was by all means a great featus.
Yeah, that sure sucks.
Yeah did it now i can die in peace…
…inside Boggy’s highly acidic stomach.
Massive fail. =p
Yes. He was trying to pork that cute little pick up.
First!
Your name says it all.
You got one thing right.
First comment, first place?
HOW MANY MORE OF THESE FLIPPING FIRST TROLLS?! HOW MANY MORE?! ARGH!!!
*screams and runs out of room*
There there, it´s only about 50% of the Internet users =)
Boggy should be happy.
They don’t flip, so don’t worry! All they do is type F*rst, and think that they are cool. Pffft. Stupid trolls.
*tosses Roy to
BOGGY*nope. Rats
You consider yourself a rat? I suppose you have your reasons.
Among several other more socially acceptable pets, my kids decided they wanted a pet rat each. They’re really quite cute, you know. They’re not quite eating size yet.
There’s plenty of time until thanksgiving.
It’s funny, a lot of people consider hamsters the starter pet par excellance… But they’re nocturnal, bitey, brutish, and short. Rats are way, way cooler. Not to mention cleaner, smarter, and friendlier. Good choice!
But they won’t let you shave them and know better than to go into a tube lubed with KY. Hamsters and gerbils go in innocently, not knowing what’s at the other end.
You really are a party girl, aren’t you?
I have enjoyed my time on this planet to date, yes.
At what cost to the planet? I imagine a trail of carnage in your wake. Carnage in need of a ShamWow.
But if the carnage has a permanent smile in place is it a bad thing?
I don’t know. How about you put on this pirate costume and let’s find out.
*blows the man down*
OH YEAH!! Wait, sorry, I read that as : “blows the mailman down”. My bad.
*shakes mental image of kool aid man busting in on kinky pirate sex*
Sure you didn’t read fireman, Strategist? Or are you a mailman?
“party girl” would be an understatement.
Hamsters are retarded. They’re lumpy, slow little duh-beasts that just sit there
in their little Habitrail units and stuff seeds in their cheeks because they like to
hoard their food in their mouth for a long time before doing anything with it, which
if you think about it, probably realise is a rather disgusting habit. Not even a
relatively “stupid” rat will do this; it’s a hamster thing. Rats can learn their
names, become tame enough with proper training to sit on one’s shoulder while
one walks around, and the really smart ones get to recognise their keepers, if they
pay enough attention to them. The only reason people even bother with hamsters
at all is this ridiculous stigma rats have, even if they’re born in captivity, to some
people just because their wild, dirtier relatives exist. It’s just as stupid as hating
all people of a certain ethnicity because one of them was once a terrorist. Except
not really, because they’re just rodents. But nevermind. Hamsters Fail and thus
we have stupid things like Hampster [sic] Dance, which never ever should have
been allowed to exist,
Rofl. First.
Grab a gun. Shoot yourself in the head. I only advocate suicide this once.
And your Choir too!
Post the results.
And don’t forget the chips/crisps.
To ostracize or not to ostracize? Hmmm, I think I’ll ostracize xeno…
*kicks Xeno to BOGGY*
Play rough with him, ok? He needs to be taugh some decency, and not be a stranger.
But the crane was secured by those pylones on every bearer.
So HOW could this happen?
He was secured by Pylones?
Obviously the fail monster saw an epic opportunity to confuse some americans and just thoght what the hell.
It’s the neighbourhood dogs that I feel sorry for. Fancy that – the biggest tyres you’ve ever seen – oh so close, but oh so far…
Would be cool is there was another crane on the other side of the street, doing the exact same thing. Kinda like a synchronized crane flip.
*IF.. not IS…
Gotcha (clicky). I’ve got this irresistible urge to believe that they are wearing those special nose clips. You know, so they can smile while they’re doing it.
Ah, I see you have a case of the typo fairies today.
*takes away fairies with controller and puts into jar*
Thanks for giving me these!
All that’s needed is for the operator to try and lift something that’s heavier than the maximum weight the crane is capable of lifting. When the boom is fully extended, if you lift something over the limit, it’s going to tip the machine, regardless of the stabalizers. In this type of machine, it’s going to tip easier when the boom is off to the side like it is here.
I work for a company that makes construction equipment, the salesmen have to tell customers all the time not to lift more than the machine can take.
the salesmen have to tell customers all the time not to lift more than the machine can take.
——————-
You’d THINK that would be obvious.
Oh wait, sorry… there’s the problem. It involves THINKING… *sigh*
Sadly who ever made the crane is liable for the damages even though the operator was clearly at fault here and exceeded the maximum load. If you notice, the front outrigger leg on the left side is broken. Those are never supposed to break and if for any reason they do then it falls back on the manufacturer and not the (clearly stupid) operator.
I used to be a welder working on the booms for these types of crane trucks. We had one come in that had rolled … the operator was drunk, parked it on a muddy slope, and exceeded the load limit. Because one of the outrigger legs wasn’t welded properly my company had to pick up the cost of repairs.
I am a crane operator and I can see what this idiot did. Look at the outriggers(Extended pieces on the crane). The ones closest to the house are too close to the crane. If you try to lift almost anything with them that close, HANG ON you are going for a ride (and probably the unemployment line).
Wow.
I’d say! I think she’s giving that yellow crane a house-job.
…dirty.
Last?
No?
photoshop!
Don’t say that! It’s like telling a little kid that there is no Santa! Poor Failbloggers!
There’s no Santa? Then who’s been eating my cookies?
I’m calling the police.
I figured since they were there and going to waste and…
…you brought them to me for eating. Thanks dude!
You stole my cookies! And finished my sentence!
Keep the cookies, but I want my sentence back.now.
You shouldn’t've left it dangling like that.
Is it well-hung?
Not! I operated cranes very similar to this for 10 years and I’ve seen it happen. Never did it but helped get it back on all fours after it did. That’s totally real.
ummm, no. look at this picture, if you think this picture is authentic, I have friend who’s deposed Nigerian prince and all we need is $1000 to get him back in to the thrown…
Thrown where and how far?
No worries, CJ, I think the unbeliever has been abducted. That’ll teach him/her to doubt our Alien Overlords.
YOU HAVE FRIEND?!?
True. True. True.
Definitely Photoshop. The scale is wrong. The angles are wrong, the shadows are wrong. The car left in the driveway would not be there if a crane was working at the house. The crane would not just rest in that position.
WTF (What the fail).I don’t know how, but this is a big fail. I’m happy to live somewhere else.
Breakin 2′: Pneumatic Boogaloo.
Breakin reference FTW
*windmills away*
Middle!
No! Bondfan!! I got one! What do I do now?
Taze him! Then toss him in the cage!
*TAZE*
Check
*TOSSES IN CAGE*
Check
Alright now what? Can I hand him over to you Bondfan?
Yep. I’ll hand him to Boggy.
*puts on hazmat suit*
Thanks… I owe you one.
Any time. It’s my job to feed Boggy anyway.
Well, here goes.
*enters cage*
Heere, Boggy Boggy, Heeere, Boggy Boggy Boggy.
*waves troll around*
OMG. O_O
Is that a double O?
Double O nothing?
Double O seven?
Double O Face?
Double O Kay?
Double O Stuff (YUM Oreos)
Double O Cup? (OH, the huge mammaries!)
I didn’t realize there were two hindenburgs.
Christopher, you are just Mr. Combo Breaker today! :p
Great. Now I have to look forward to Mondays, because less trolls are around then. Thanks trolls!
*borrows Loz’s red pen*
Robodance gone wild.
Yes, looks like the vehicle decided to hit on the house.
Could always be an optical illusion…
…caused by a black hole in the house!
…or an optional illusion, if someone chooses to deny seeing it at all.
Isn’t that an optical delusion?
Might be, might not be; that makes it optional.
Touché
Double Touché Burger?
Hmm, yes please!
I’m not convinced it’s consensual.
The crane did that on purpose!
Uh oh ..sshh…… SHIT!
Honk? Honk honk honk
It looks like the support booms on the RH side were not extended all the way out, so it just fell over under the weight. i wonder who got the sack for that? lol
Either someone took the sack, or it’s a female crane.
It was probably neutered. People don’t want thousands of baby cranes running around without homes… You’ve gotta do what you’ve gotta do.
And if you don’t, Bob Barker will personally hunt you down and kick your ass.
Why? Is the Price not Right?
psst, BondFan,
*whispers*
Barker often used his game show (and its smiling leggy models) to advocate spaying and neutering pets.
F I R S T !
N O , Y O U A R E N O N O W H E R E N E A R F I R S T Y O U B R A I N L E S S T R O L L .
*cross out first no*
Bukkit, please.
I thought that was emphasis.
*pauses*
Yeah, emphasis. Definitely. That was for emphasis.
*shifty eyes*
Avoiding the bukkit 101…
I think I’ll start that class now. It’s for bukkitophobics.
For further lessons you should see Avis, Dragon or Ryannon. A bad teacher I would be.
*snork*
Don’t take that class from Avis…she spends so much time with the bukkit that she eventually got her very own.
AtB 101 includes a “how not to” section. Who could give better lessons than someone owning a bukkit?
I especially like the little hats on the crane’s “legs” (the ones that are in the air).. they look purdy!
So do I! Having gone through the effort, I think she looks quite fetching. I wonder if she’s got green headlights…
buba thinks this picture is taken from transformers 2.
Bondfan thinks buba should stop talking in the third person before bad things happen to him.
Arthur Eld thinks, therefore he is.
I cut, therefore you bleed.
When you cut me do I not blee… Oh, I do.
Not for long
Waiter: “Sir, would you like some cream for your coffee?”
Descarte: “No…I think not.”
*POOF!</b–Descarte disappears*
Waiter: “What the hell…??”
Waiter #2: “He thought not, therefore he isn’t.”
CRAP.
/bold tag
*sneaks in*
*carefully inserts two “s”*
*disappears*
Ooh, thank you. Fortunately, my head is already in the bukkit.
Gah! It looks like someone let the trolls out, and someone removed the concrete cover over the ICHC portal! Whoever did that: You let the typo fairies in! How could you!
*gets off soapbox*
*reseals the portal and leaves the feeble trolls to die*
Actually had a paramedic tell me that “all bleeding stops … eventually”
!!?? ;_;
what could happen to buba? buba’s not bad, don’t hurt him
Bondfan will give buba one last chance, and if he catches buba speaking in third person again, buba will become Boggy the bog monster’s favourite new toy.
Hammykins wonders why the third person offends BondFan so much.
Wouldn’t your comment just break your own rules?
cough*paradox*cough
Pair of docks?
Pair of ducks!
*quacks up*
Pair o’ dice.
*sunbathes*
Pair o’ sites.
*but likes this one much better than the cat one*
Pair o’ normal
*ignores the abnormal*
Pair o’ sails.
*raises the jib*
Pair o’ dimes.
*sees an inexpensive pattern here*
Pair o’ sols
*looks like rain*
Pair o’ mours.
*looks for Christopher*
Pair o’ bulls.
*it’s quite a story*
Pair o’ medics.
*it’s accidental*
Pari o’ Neils.
*I see them every spring*
Pair o’ dice.
*don’t eat the apples*
Merde.
Sacre le bleu.
Latrine!
Du Quois!
Pair-iodontist.
*to get to the root of the matter*
Pair o’ Covered Wagons
It’s Occidental
honey can you pass the hacksaw
Is anyone else wondering what’s on the other side of that crane?
Transformer WIN !
Transformer drunk, more like.
Lawn WIN! Full support provided without subsidence.
In this case it it would appear that the outriggers are extended and correctly deployed, if the load is outside the crane design envelope then gravity wins.
Last!
WARNING: The next person who uses the above word will be tazed on sight and devoured by Boggy, the resident Bog monster. There are no exceptions, I repeat, no exceptions.
Not even when the word is used in a full sentence? I think wit should also be a criteria!
Fine, I retract my last statement, and use of the word ‘last’ on its own, with no witty/inherent meaning, is illegal.
*steals ‘a’ and replaces with ‘on’*
Sorry Arthur– had to act on a singular pet-peeve of mine.
Warning: the next person to post after Dick Palmer will invalidate his statement, thereby creating a wormhole that will destroy the world.
But… that would mean this post…
Oh shi…
This is pretty comical looking!
Okay. I took your test. 44.8 wpm.
I did too. 50.6 wpm.
Hahaha I got 66 wpm, but I had 3 or 4 errors. Now I can’t get above 60 though.
0 errors, 65 wpm!
*does a little dance*
I am so good!
14 WPM!!!!11!!!!!1
I am teh best!
65.2 WPM
Im satisfied with that for now
Woot! Bumped it up to 70.4 wpm!
*does a little dance*
*makes a little love*
*gets down tonight!*
Grr… I can’t believe I only got 32 wpm the first time and 38.6 the second time. Probably because I always stop to correct my mistakes. But hey, that’s pretty good for someone who types one-handed!
Where is your other hand???
I usually sit on it. With very little fine motor control, typing with two hands just takes too much coordination.
Or you can go ahead and assume I sit on it for another reason.
I figured you might have lost it in a freak cement mixer accident. I know someone that lost his hand that way.
Woohoo! 77.4wmp! But I had plenty of errors.
108.4 wpm, 3 errors. WOOT!!
Hey there, k-k-k-katy! We missed you!
Wow, nice, katy!
I was proud that I managed 0 errors, 82.2 wpm but that’s awesome!
128.6
Do you use a normal keyboard?
yea, the standard black Dell kind…
But how many words did you get right?
Who needs accuracy? It’s all about the speed, man.
416.
.
If I add all of my attempts together.
How many attempts?
*cough*208*cough*
*cough*orwasit416?*cough*
How many were that?
i had 6 wrong words
Hey I wonder what velvet’s speed would be?
If only there was some way to get her to tell us.
Gravity win!
Well, that was one of the first fails to appear here. Remembrance day?
I really hope they don’t get their money back.
‘t would be rather funny.
95th…
Stunt Bonus!
Wow, now THAT would be enough to ruin yer day!
RT
http://www.anonymity.eu.tc
Just like spamming.
this is what HDR photography is made for!
holly shet!
Holy Shetland Islands?
Shetland Sheepdogs?
Shetland ponies?
How did this Shetland on my shoes?
O’Reilly don’t know.
That must have been one heck of a septic tank!
win fail
fail win
Is it not sucking Humans from the building using a straw?
Won’t someone think of the children?!
They were trying to drop something in the backyard with the crane maybe, but the base of the crane should have been on the driveway to get better leverage. They were lazy and/or stupid and left it in the street.
Or maybe they weren’t sure that the driveway would have taken that ginormous amount of weight?
The crane is thinking: “I will suck out your brains using bendy straws!”
Then of course it fell over
You gotta feel sorry for the crane operator, he must have nearly sh*t himself when that happened.
true.
breakdancing crane!
yea, omg, what a fail crane!
I was thinking the same thing :O
Thats what happens when you “Over-extend” yourself….
xD
Do I always get the sama avatar? >.<
same*
Unless you find the power within yourself to change it. Seek the Force!
Or go to gravatar.com. And seek the Force there.
I hope that we have done well, leading this young one on his way. I’d hate to see him fall to the dark side of the Force.
I am a she. >.<
Hopefully the homeowner will leave it there. Looks better than pink flamingos or those silhouettes of people bending over.
But, slightly more drafty during those winter nights.
Looks like so -.-;;
Lol
How stupid! LOL
Hun, Did we order a hot tub?
this pic is fake
I think you’re fake.
Your comment is fake
Your fake is fake.
Serious comment now:
All the attention the FIRSTers and the LASTers and all the other annoying trolls is just encouraging them. We had fewer of them before we started tazing and throwing them to the bog.
Reading the fails would be so much more fun if we didn’t have to scroll over all the tazing threads searching for an intelligent comment.
Echoes my thoughts exactly.
*Signs petition*
Sometimes it is very hard to resist. But since Ry kicked my ass for it, I will at least not respond to FIRSTers and LASTers directly. Give me that petition!
*signs*
I do not recall kicking anyone’s ass over anything. I just stated facts and sentiments that are felt by many and voiced by few. I get in trouble for that at times.
Yes. It’s called “taboo”.
Uh yeah no. It’s called having balls.
Surely that phrase only applies for boys? A more apt phrase would be “Having guts”.
Yes, but most people in the UK have a negative view of immigrants, and the only people voicing that are the BNP (British Nationalist Party) The Daily Mail (nicknamed “The Daily Heil”) and UKIP (UK Independence Party).
Be careful what you say.
I guess it is a good thing that I don’t live in the UK and don’t care what people in the UK use as a phrase. And since I am not an immigrant in my own country, I don’t even care about negative views of immigrants in any country, much less the UK.
Well, I don’t really care either, but what concerns me is that you think you know what’s on everybody’s mind. Surely you should play it safe?
Many does not equal everybody. And I am done answering to a child.
There arises another issue. Why do you treat me as a child? I am 15, almost an adult, and I would like to be treated as one. I cannot understand why you are so ageist.
Pardon me…
*inserts self into squabble*
*signs petition*
*edges back out of squabble*
Opps… I forgot to sign
*Signs petition*
*signs*
*sings*
Hey this is great and all, but I’m up for one last Taze-off in the next fail (after the snowboarding one). Is that cool with anyone?
Please yourself…but I am 100% with fluffy on this one.
Alright, I guess for the sake of Failblog I wont…
*sign, sign, pass*
*signs once, pass*
To Bassplaya:
How credible is the line “I’m up for one last Taze-off”? To further clarify my question, try to replace “Taze-off” with “cigarette”, “candybar” or “look at my favorite pornsite”.
*signs*
I wonder if a mace to the face would work… no, not the pepper spray…
*signs petition as Mickey Mouse*
Well, someone had to.
ps, thankyou for the linkage czuhc
never did anny of the tazing and bog throwing, i just wached, and waited until i could jump in… now i lost that chance… can i taze myself?
*signs*
*rustle of wings*
*soft patter of paws*
I see I’ve missed a bit while I was gone!
*signs*
Except that the proposal doesn’t have anything to do with reality.
There are not more trolls because you ‘fed’ them, or because they feel validated when they get tazed, or even because your prayers to jeebus backfired and now he h8ts you. There are more trolls because trolls are idiots doing what idiots do, and as this site attracts more people, it also attracts more idiots.
And even if your ‘feeding’ theory were correct, it wouldn’t matter. Because there will always be a fresh supply of idiots to complain and feed the first idiot’s ego.
So this proposal will accomplish exactly one thing: It will switch from people flaming the firsters to people flaming the people who flame the firsters.
Oh snap! Lets do that right now! What a change!
Thanks for sharing.
You’re welcome in the same spirit that you meant the thanks.
Just can’t watch a horde of buffoons racing in concert towards a cliff edge without saying “You know mate, that’s a cliff edge you’re charging towards”. I’m contrary like that.
While it’s true we cannot control the hordes of idiots that will come here, we can control what we (the regulars) do with them. There are plenty of threads in the past couple of months that are just one taze after the other, and it’s impossible to read anything funny or intelligent in those threads.
Tazes were funny at the beginning, but the novelty wore off pretty quickly, especially since it brought no results. It’s just tiresome and annoying.
*Signs petition*
But I am going to taze at least one troll before I start taze prohabition.
*signs*
BUT I SHALL
Haha, not that anyone actually remembers me…
SHOW MY SUPPORT for this petition thingy.
*erases “kicked my ass”, replaces with “taught me a valuable lesson”*
Better? You’re certainly not in trouble, as far as I am concerned. Hell, I wouldn’t dare to get into trouble with you!
*Delurks and looks around*
Hello! In full agreement with Fluffy & co-signers here. Scroll finger has been getting a lot more exercise lately.
*Signs petition and relurks*
Awww man! I just started tazing too! I guess your right though…
And for you above me, stop fighting over Failblog seniority.
Shut up and be funny again.
Sorry, Bassplaya.
*shuts up about seniority*.
Better?
*Puts on reading glasses*
Mmm, mmmh… Well, Fluffy really makes a point here. I’ll sign this petition.
*Signs*
Well, if you excuse me, I’ll be dismantling my ST-900XS. Maybe I’ll start a toaster factory with all the pieces.
okie, I’m in, I suppose
Newly on the market: 3 bedroom, 2.5 bath home on quiet street. Close to schools. Recent renovations include a new sky light. Needs a little work. Roof may leak a little when raining. Crane included in selling price.
Sugrr! She of the faint avatar! *hugs* Welcome back!
how much? Personally, I’d not take it unless you paid me.
does that mean the government gives me money on the negative value of the house?
Is it just me, or does this picture look totally fake. I don’t think I’ve seen something more photoshoped ever…
It’s just you.
No, it’s a total faker.
unbeliever, this is at least the second time you’ve said this. You wouldn’t happen to be…trolling, now would you?
Obvious photoshop is obvious.
Looks like a Transformers break-dance competition
LOL
FAKE
no, just old
Looks like the outriggers weren’t extended at all on the ‘house side’ of the crane, just fully extended on the road side. That and the fact the feet were planted on boards probably didn’t help.
No, the outrigger were extended but the hydraul cylinders couldn’t sustain the weight of the tipped over crane and broke/slid in.
Also, the foot on the leg closest to the camera is non-existent…
first
first is worst
bratwurst
hot dogs
sexual innuendo
failblog is just 4-chan.
Not a compliment btw.
Ha ha! Shitty American technology!
shit happens no matter if you are american or an evil foreigner. so shut up.
Apparently, good foreigners are off the hook.
or hookers.
and now we will start the traditional crappy sexual pun chain that will carry on for about 500 comments.
No way, there is nothing to pun about. But I love the crane rental ad below these comments.
If you don’t like it here, I would be more than happy to remove you from the premises. Really. Please.
Ha ha! You stupid American. Me own you big time, ha ha!
It’s dancing!
Ha cha cha cha, cha cha cha, cha cha *CRASH*
first
*bitchslaps*
that machine LOVES that roof!
http://www.lowbrowsophisticate.com/category/jack-grabber
Dear Foghat,
you suck. Seriously, no one likes you, no one clicks your spam links and everybody wishes that you stop.
Is this really the life you wanted to have when you were a child? Look at a childhood picture of yourself – don’t you disappoint that kid with what you’re doing today? Can’t you smell the rotten dreams of your youth?
Please go away and find yourself a job with some dignity. I know it’s hard these days, but the difficulties of a task can never be the excuse for not trying.
Yours (not really!)
Arthur Eld
that looks pretty cool
…freestylin’…
DECEPTICON WIN
LAST!!!
Excuse me for a minute.
*leaves room*
SCHEISSE NOCHMAL!!! Könnte eventuell mal EINER meiner Kommentare NICHT gefressen werden?!? REISS DICH MAL ZUSAMMEN, FAILBLOG!!!! Das ist KACKE, DIGGER!!!
*comes back*
Hrm, well – sorry. I had to do that.
The blogmonster…he likes you.
That’s not mutual. Worst of all: I tend to find my comments funnier when I write them than when I see them. Therefore I always think that the funniest comments I ever made end up being eaten by the blogmonster.
Well, I found your comment up there absolutely HIGH-larious!
Why thank you… *blushes*
Arthur, have you been watching Der Untergang? Just a thought.
Yes. But why are you asking?
*innocent look*
Well, when I saw those German words typed in such a vicious and forte manner, I noticed a resemblence to when Hitler loses it in Der Untergang.
I understood
.
Why “loses it”? That’s a perfectly normal German reaction when things go wrong!
So, if I am in Berlin, I know if a German’s angry when he suddenly blames everyone but himself? Thanks for the tip!
BFF, that was unkind and unfunny. What’s gotten into you today?
I think he misses his tazer.
Sorry, my cynicism is getting ahold of me. I’ll be careful in future.
*goes to sit in the corner and think about what he’s done*
I just don’t like it when you treat nice people like trolls, that’s all.
*gives BFF a cookie*
Don’t worry, it’s alright! In Berlin that’s indeed the typical reation – that’s where our government is…
*inserts c*
Bukkit, please?
Here you go.
*passes the bukkit*
Thanks.
*kerSPLOTCH*
Oh God, I think something in there was still alive…
*peers into bukkit*
Is that…Boggy’s breakfast? Oh no…
“typical creation”?
Hahaha! Good one
Sorry if I insulted you, Arthur. I really didn’t mean it.
.
I heard from my German teacher the Germans are never satisfied with their leader and always find something to complain about him or her. Is that true?
You didn’t.
.
Isn’t it everywhere like that? But actually, our chancellor is relativly popular, at least more popular than Gordon Brown is or Bush was. The political “class” as a whole – that’s another story…
Thanks. I never like to hurt people’s feelings unless they deserve it. No failblogger deserves it, except the trolls.
.
Gordon Brown was better as Chancellor than Prime Minister. Now that gun crime and knife crime are through the roof, the economy is heading towards depression and the immigration system is in chaos, it’s probably time to let the Conservatives have a go.
I’ve heard positive things about Angela Merkel. Apparently she’s really handling the economy well.
Not really. She is driven by other politicians, the press and the public opinion. She allows things to happen, although she doesn’t really want them. Good thing is that Germany has a strong industrial basis, that helps in times like this. Bad thing is we’re an exporting champion and therefore rely on other countries economies.
LAST!!!!
how in the holy hell did that happen lol
Seedy Underbelly of Housing Bubble exposed.
Trolled NOOBS were trolled. Obvious photoshop.
DAMN YOU BLOGMONSTER FOR EATING MY COMMENTS!!! DAMN YOU!!!
*shakes fist at screen*
Basil!
*jumps surprisedly*
Sorry, my dear.
Now where the hell is Manuel? MANWELL! MANWELL!
WHO the hell is Manuel?!
Clickie for the Manuel Wiki.
Que?
Someone call Robert Smith!
Looking for a cure? Are you contagious?
*scooootch*
Call the police! This contagion is giving me the CeeBie-GeeBies.
Me first! Gimme gimme!!!
yeah that one is photo shopped you can tell simply because they would never use that in a residential area and it looks really fake
way fake.. you will never see that in the residential area, and it looks fake as well
If you say it a third time you make it true.
…or the crane appears in his residential area!
Kind of like Beetlejuice?
I’m not sure. If Beetlejuice destroys houses then yes.
Beatle Guese?
Or, as a Mr. V Lenin puts it:
” A lie told often enough becomes the truth”
Actual truth, or perceived truth?
Truth, as dictated by the Ministry of Truth.
So, 2+2 = 5?
If the party says so, yes.
*puts on party dress*
*prepares the party line*
But the Bush administration is not in power anymore!
You can’t destroy the Cheney! It’s always there – waiting, watching… sometimes shooting friends in the face…
There’s something about that man that disturbs me. I think it’s the pure evil that oozes from every pore of his being.
Shh! The mind police are always alert! You don’t want to anger the Cheney! Big Cheney watches you!
Yes, that is a little disturbing. He would’ve been a top-notch Nazi or he might’ve served Attila well.
I can just imagine Cheney on horseback, trampling hapless peasants as he cackles maniacally at the village he just burnt down.
He would have made Machiavelli proud.
Actually, Machiavelli wasn’t as bad as he’s perceived today. He described, he didn’t advertise. But Machiavelli would most likely take Cheney as an example.
Cheney = Machiavelli. Reincarnation IS real.
*inserts “today”*
Machiavelli said (paraphrased) If you can’t make them love you, make them fear you.
I think Cheney took notes.
Cheney changed it a little to “If I can’t make them love me (and that will never happen!) I wil make them fear as much things as possible”. Damn, that worked pretty well!
He also said “Hey, if they don’t know, better for me!”
Cheney took ol’ Machi really seriously.
Brings to mind the adage “those who do not learn from history
are doomed to repeat it”. Here’s hoping we (society as a whole) learned this time. Any one taking bets on this?
No?
Didn’t really think so.
I suppose that’s the downside of the amazing US-American ability to look in the future…
I think we should have a book of THINGS NOT TO DO FROM HISTORY, such as:
1. Don’t invade Russia in the winter. Remember King Charles of Sweden? Napoleon? Hitler? Who next?
Make that: 1. Don’t invade Russia.
Arthur, … and see only what we want too?
Manuel? That book would have to have SEVERAL volumes.
Avis, the ability to renew (is that a word? I’m getting tired…) is a strenght that you should be proud of. Of course, it would be quite nice if it wasn’t needed too often. We’re having kind of the opposite here: We’re aware of the past and that sometimes hinders progress.
Um.. where ARE you?
And yes, it would be nice if we didn’t have to renew (it IS a word) so often . Especially considering how young a country we really are.
Check out some comments above, I may have reveald my whereabouts
.
Yes, that’s true and yes, you are. But you did it – again! Sure, re-electing Bush wasn’t a good idea (for the USA and the world). But I do think that eight years of Bush taught some lessons and eight years of Obama will proove that another way is possible. And better. Even when the conservative backlash comes, some things will not be changed back. Hey, your country was able to overcome Bush!
To re-elect someone you first have to elect them. We didn’t RE-elect that idiot. And we have yet to see if we can recover from the mess he made. I fervently hope we can.
And Arthur, I looked at some of those past comments. That’s where I can trace the bulk of my ancestry. Go far enough down the lineage and it’s Pomeranian, but still.
For a good laugh clickie the nickie. Assuming of course that it worked.
You’re right! My bad.
Alright, just this once I will be a prophet: You will recover. Ruins, scars, suffering? Yes, for sure. A return to how it was from 1990-2000? Nope. Greatness, taking on challenges with a smile – yep. It will take time, but you will make it. Have faith! If that’s not enough for you, then read about the past 100 years (or 200). The USA were in stormy waters quite often…
I like the way you think, Arthur.
There’s no clicky… and I didn’t really understand your comment
Thanks Dragon!
Avis – now I understand! Should have looked up Pomeranian before…
Apparently the link I tried didn’t want to work.
Most of my ancestry is German, though if you go far enough back in history it’s not so German as Pomeranian, (and the first one to make a joke about that, gets a GLOWER) according to my father’s family.
Then hello, distant relative
or Guten Abend Avis.
.
It was a really nice conversation but I have to sleep now (it’s almost half past two…). Thank you Dragon and Avis and sleep well! See you soon
G’night, Arthur! Sweet dreams.
The one thing I was happy about during the Bush administration was that, despite attempts by pretzels, Bush did not die. Because that would have made Cheney president.
For very large values of 2, yes.
*facepalm*
Only for very large values of 2.
its fake.. thats the third time lol.. first one didnt appear when i posted so i posted the second one
That’s a pretty good photoshop job as they included all the fluids spilling on the driveway and the fact that only one of the legs in the air kept its foot. And you can’t use the residential area argument, because that is exactly what might be used for installing a hot tub or similarly heavy/large item to be placed in the back of a house.
looks to be photoshoped
Center of Gravity Calculation Fail. Its not necessarily a question of how much weight was being lifted, as that is a function of the length of the extension boom and the angle from the outriggers that the the boom is located.
You know how jokes become less funny when explained? This is a reasonable facsimile of the very same principal.
I donno, I think this one is still pretty damn funny, explanation or no
It’s not a question of where he grips it, it’s a simple question of weight ratio.
Maybe if 2 cranes lifted it together…
I guess this is what a drive-by from the contractors’ union looks like…
They wouldn’t give in, even when they threatened to break their legs with trowels.
can’t you see that this is just a crane-transformer transformin’? dur.
Its clearly just break dancing and yet we all think it fell.
Ops.. I’m scare… What happened?
Heavy-Construction-Vehicle-Xgames WIN!
This is not physically possible. I am a physicist.
…does your dog bite?
…wait a minute…compare our avatars…what is your father’s family name?…
Not the first time I’ve heard of that happening, but that photo is full of WIN. ^_^
Run run run!It’s a decepticon!
*inserts self into thread*
LAST!!!
*runs away fast dodging tazer-wielding lunatics*
This photo is just being misinterpreted: the crane is simply demonstrating his mad BREAKdancing skilz…
hahahaha! this happened to my grandfather!!! LOLOLOLOL
DEFINITELY PHOTOSHOPPED
You think this is photoshopped because you cant make a crane breakdance better than this. >D
Where, exactly do you get an image of a crane from this angle TO photoshop it onto a house? Hmmm? HMMMMMM?????
Now THAT is an EPIC fail!!!
first!
Not a very good Photoshop job.
They should have changed the orientation of the cones and adjusted the shadowing.
Construction/Heavy Machinery FAIL
Amazing photo subject WIN
Seriously, i’d give one of my kidneys to spend just an hour with a camera and this baby.
STOP! HAMMERTIME!!
Transformer
Crane breakdances 80’s stylee!
That crane is OBVIOUSLY break dancing.
It looks like a breakdancing Transformer!
this is more than likely a photoshoped pic. very unlikely.
its like a malfunctioning transformer
I know it’s not a road roller but…
WRYYYYYY!
Stop. Hammer time
Transformer win
TRANSFORMERZZZZ!!!
Totally thought of that in the back of my mind.
Then decided that the composition was full of awesome.
Pretty sure this is a win.
That is actually epic oo;;
PRETTY COMPOSITON FAIL
Yay!
What fail – dude wanted a skylight…
Biggest fail I’ve seen in 11 pages, & I love it.
Ummm. Fake fail. How sad.
its easy to see its fake
EPIC FAIL!!!!!
what the hell was it trying to lift anyways?
must of been rather heavy
TRANSFORM
no no no hes transforming WIN
Is that crane break dancing?
TRANS4M3R WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
How Can They Do That?
shit ^_-
Barrel Roll?
A fail? Really? To me, pulling of a trick like that in a digger is classed as epic win.
Omg. Its the apocolyps. FLYING CRANES
damnit who taught the Decepticons how to breakdance
SICK ONE CRANE DRIVER!!! FML IF I WAS HIM!!!!
Latino crane? Hydraulics? Airbags? This and more on….
Crane Weekly at 11:00