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Cheezburger Network Blog
Photos can be seen on Rotten.com.
How did you know my homepage?
Same way I know you’re not wearing any underwear.
You need to adjust your auto-focus, methinks. I am wearing underwear, it’s just an ultra tiny thong! Watch me floss with it.
^bump^ this is not a fail. One should always shoot the choir.
Blood sports are banned here.
Except for every fourth week…when we lay out the bath towels.
I’m glad you didn’t miss your period.
And I yours.
how can you shoot yourself and THEN shoot your choir?
It requires higher desire to fire at your choir after you, the employer, has hired a lawyer whom others admire
There’s something in the corners of your mouth. I hope that’s Shiraz.
Is that DrB? I thought it was the Joker.
Let me tell you how he got that scar…
You’d better wax, or he’ll be the Choker. Amateur.
Haha! Well no one likes a jungle.
“One in the hand is worth two in the bush.”
Other way around.
*wipes*
I did not peg you for a rear admiral.
Good thing too…there’s plenty of others here who’d appreciate your peg
I think you missed the point.
Don’t worry, I got your ref…just thought I’d open the thread for MrC and Bod
I was not poking fun of you.
I was just pushing-out of the thread.
Hey! Who left the back door open??
Dirty Sanchez.
I thought he plugged it like a dyke.
The fail is the order. You’re suppose to shoot the choir first, otherwise it does work out.
The other dilemma is how to send it to
them after you shoot yourself unless,
of course, you only shoot to maim.
Via web Cam.
I watched you walk away
Hopeless, with nothing to say
I strain my eyes
Hoping to see you again
This is my curse (the longing)
This is my curse (time)
This is my curse (the yearning)
This is my curse
There is love burning to find you
Will you wait for me?
Will you be there?
Your silence haunts me
But I still hunger for you
This is my curse (the wanting)
This is my curse (time)
This is my curse (the needing)
This is my curse
There is love burning to find you
Will you wait for me?
And still I want
And still I ache
But still I wait
To see you again
Dying, inside, these walls
Dying, inside, these walls
And I see your face in these tears
In these tears
And I see your face…
There is love
There is love
There is love
There is love
There is love
There is love
There is love
There is love
Are you really that much of an asshole that you insist on doing this fail after fail? Jesus Christ you need to just choke on your own pimple length dick.
Ry–I’ve got frosty beverages today. Want one? I find they take the edge off.
Do they knock the top off?
Sorry. I’m with Ry on this one. This guy gives me the pip.
Don’t forget Gladys.
THERE IS SPARTA!
There tree. There scary castle.
WHY are you talking like that?
I dunno, I thought you wanted to.
Combo win!
ohgod that site gave me nightmares for a month!! Dx
Lol nice
Lol twice
lol mice
rofl spice
cool lice
first! well, you only do it once…
But your FAIL delivers over, and over, and over…
maybe my name gives you a hint…
You spelled turdie wrong.
Firs-Damn it!
With your math skills, it’s no wonder you had problems with that pie chart.
*cuts a slice*
Anyone else want a piece?
*tries please-feed-me-cake dance again*
how much do you want?
Anything over 10″ is a bellyfull.
*perks*
Well, that’s about half.
That wasn’t me damn it! I do kind of suck at maths though…
Where can i see the result already sent in?
It’ll be ready from the path lab in the morning…but I’m pretty sure they won’t find any tadpoles.
first! .troll acting.
No cake for you!
*does the please-feed-me-cake dance*
No cake, but there is pie several post higher.
He prefers hair pie sans hair.
Hair pie sans hair is just … pie, right? To how many decimal places again?
When you are old enough to like girls, you will understand all about girls that wax and shave.
First!
FIRST TIME!
Ejaculatio praecox doesn’t count. You’re still a virgin.
lol good one xDD
first chubby!
*Grabs a blade* … and last chubby, incidently. *slice!
I never pegged you for a chubby chaser.
Forget the choir, let’s nail the Jehovah’s Witnesses.
I once met a Jehovah’s Witness who was also an atheist. He knocked on my door, and when I opened it, he just stood there and looked at me.
Is there anyone Mookie will not nail?
While besides me.
Highly doubtful…I don’t even like vag and I got nailed
I’m not sure. All I remember is waking up with to the smell of chloroform and watching Mookie toss a wadded-up $20 at me before leaving.
That reminds me – where’s my change?
I spent it on detox. I apparently have a bad reaction to roofies.
Damn you people are hard core.
I’ll have to take your word for it. I can’t remember any of it, though the tattoo’s give an inkling of what happened.
You have to meet a certain “standard” for her to nail you. It is a well known fact that Jehovah’s Witnesses are well hung.
Just like Jesus. That’s why Mookie nails them.
I Loled.
Don’t worry I’ll clean it up.
Don’t believe all the bathroom graffiti you read. I do not nail “everyone”, and I did NOT accidenty that urinal cake.
You mean for a good time, I can’t call you?
Maybe he witnessed more than he had anticipated. Were you naked?
No, but you’ve given me a great idea for the next time one of them knocks on my door….
*hurriedly joins the Jehovah’s Witness Club*
*sings*
Come and knock on our door….we’ve been waiting for you….
This is such a perfect set-up for a knock-knock joke, but I can’t bring myself to tell one.
Knock, knock.
who is there?
Beats.
‘I think I know where this is going, but I’ll play your game’
Beats who?
Beats me? Please?
kinky
*beats the shit out of DrB* Ohhh this is fun, who’s next?
The joke wasn’t that bad. The suspense waiting for the punchline built it up though.
Who’s there?
Ima.
Ima who.
Whoa…that has changed my view of you entirely…can my friend call you for a good time?
Are you in some way connected to a well known vicar?
Her father’s username is v-v-v-vicar.
*wonders if he can make a gagging-while-baptising joke?*
You summoned me?
Holy potato!
Ry was right…*amazed*…all roads
DO lead to potato!
You could have ended it at right. I am a woman afterall. We are always right.
Rule #2. If woman is wrong, see Rule #1.
I see you were a star pupil in obedience class.
…or you could put a hit on a Mormon.
a moomin?
*cowers*
*whispers* hey Mikey! you can hide over here!
Man you are so screwed!
*Sneaks and hides behind the magnificent mr. cuddles*
Stay there…I’ll let you know when the hit is taken off.
I saw that!
Don’t bend over cuddles! He has a potato.
Nothing like a good Irish meal. Start with the whiskey and end with the meat and potatoes.
*bangers the mash*
Pork pie?
Hide the cabbage?
I like the part that goes
‘As part of the environment for the 2009 NPM National Convention in Chicago, we will be projecting images of our members. . .’
I hope they put a sock on it.
It’s like projecting your voice on stage…you’ve just gotta breath properly and then share it with the audience.
Shoot yourself! I’m pretty sure the advice columnist wrote this ad.
fourteenth
first shoot!
*shoots firster*
shoot again. shoot some more and then post your pics
Oh, I get it! Shoot is a euphemism for masturbate…
Watch where you’re pointing that gun, Kemo Sabe.
Not in the face!
I see you’ve been attending Ryannon’s School for Boys.
Ass, gas, or grass, nobody passes for free at Ry’s School.
She said she would make me a man.
You mean like Professor Frankenfurter? Then you have to allow 6 to 8 weeks for delivery.
And take off that huge diaper – it’s unbecoming.
I like to be coming, or going. It does not matter.
He never graduated the “not in the hair” part and couldn’t move on to the “no mushroom printing” phase. His enthusiasm and age got the best of him.
I can’t help it. It was too heavy and I had to choke up.
I can handle my own equipment, thankyouverymuch.
While next time I will remember to bunt.
Mmmm bunt cake with a nice streussel swirl topping.
I am sure I can pop one up in a pinch.
I hope that’s not a loaf you are pinching.
Everything is a euphemism for masturbate.
Don’t forget to clean your gun after.
“Everything’s coming up roses.” Yep.
All roads lead to masturbation.
I M sure you’re right.
Your clicky is a road that doesn’t lead to masturbation.
I pulled over to the side of the road and masturbated when I saw it.
You make Jesus cry.
Just baby Jesus.
Juses loves you, just not in that way.
Yes he does, he’s just embarrassed to admit it.
I take it you have seen my butt plug.
It would help if you didn’t leave it as a centerpiece.
Christopher, check your Myspace page.
Where did you lose it Ry?
Next to the 5 pound bag of potatoes I am also missing.
“come again?”
Always.
With wings?
And a little wet-wipe for your vag.
And one for your mouth, sweets.
W…! I think I’ll go and feed the mushrooms now.
Whoopsadaisy. *wipes mouth*
I blame DrB’s bad influence.
It’s a bloody shame, it is.
You know what they call that in France?
Do tell. I can’t collect enough vulgar foreign language euphemisms.
Tuna melt, or if you prefer a Royal with cheese.
You have to clean the field if you want to play.
*plays with jules*
I like fetch.
Get with Mookie and you will learn to beg.
Do I get a treat?
Get with me and I’ll teach you to roll over.
*hides potato*
Should I sit?
Wait…wait…okay, now, sit!
…and sit kinda hard. Like you’ve fallen from a great height, say, hanging curtains.
This seems a bit shady.
“A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush?”
*Ponders
*Ponders Rosa*
Gun Smoke could also be a euphamism.
For the wet patch?
For the wet snatch?
I slept in the wet spot last night and I slept alone! I have to stop masturbating.
or invite friends.
Not related to this, but why won’t my image show up in posts? When I go to my profile page, I see it there. Please help! *begs*
Hmm, strange. Did you already try shooting the choir?
What profile page?
Turn side on Mikey.
You have an enitre page dedicated to the side of your face DrB? That’s a tad vain!
I think you misspelled vein.
I know I misspelled vane.
So you do this just for the fun of it?
No, it’s a punishment for being a bad moomin.
Bad, wicked, naughty Moomin.
Yes! Yes! He can take us! He can take ALL of us!
I think you misspelled van
gravatar.com
Clear cache. I don’t know what that means, but that’s what they always say. Clear cache.
Cache only, the cheques in the post.
Clear your browser cache, grasshopper.
See?
Is that really the answer?
Why would you doubt solid advice given on FB?
mainly bc i tried it also, and I still don’t see my icon
Oooh, hang on. Do you have an ICHC account which allows you to have an image on your cheezburger posts? Although the sites are under the same umbrella, it doesn’t work here. If you go to Gravatar.com, like DrB suggests, you can link an image to your email address.
Oh My. I just went to lolcats for the first time.
What language is that? Why is it funny? And nobody is flirting.
It’s like a sort of hell.
(actually I lie: one of the pictures made me laugh. I am a bad person)
Hello! I tried writing in lolcat in a message to a friend yesterday and even I didn’t know what I had written afterwards. Personally, I love the pictures.
Are we going to have to taze you for being a bad Bod?
Maybe…
*taze*
Have you been a bad Bod?
Oooooo!
Maybe…
*taze*
*taze*
Are you sorry?
Is that the truth? How do we know we can trust you?
A shady moomin would have mentioned parasols, not umbrellas. Don’t rain on my parade.
I’ve heard choirs like that.
Christ, where was this ad when I was in high school choir? The teacher made everyday feel like a potential murder/suicide pact waiting to happen.
Where you eventually shot?
Or did you eventually shoot the choir?
I just don’t get it. It’s a drug reference? Yuk.
Does it have to be in that order? Cause the choir would be home free…
Only if you FATALLY shot yourself. You could shoot yourself in the foot, then shoot the choir in the head …
What do they need “the results” of a choir-massacre-suicide for? Fresh organs? Dogfood? Satanic rituals?
I hope it’s dog food!
*wags tail*
theyre necrophiliacs.
they’re pedophiliacs.
They’re choirophobics.
You misspelled Satinic.
experienced much?
ST. Nick?
Nick ST.?
Stinck?
Saint Tan Nick, the hippie beach bum surfer saint.
LOL – the ONLY good response. Take a bow T.
Satin nic’s
Nic’s in white satin
Never leaves ’till he bends…
That’s too hard for me. I’ll ask Cheyney for help.
do you have to send the results in seperate boxes?
Scary dude, dont give these dumb kids of today any ideas!
RT
http://www.online-anonymity.at.tc
Lol btw, nice name
lol, funny thing is i’m actually GOING to this conference…national pastoral musicians… hahaha
Noooo! You have so much to live for! Don’t go there!
Watch your back!
…and cover you ace.
Send us PICTURES!
and Descriptions!
Oh, I can’t wait!
NPM is sometimes scary…
I tried to do this but it’s a trick. You can’t send the results after you shoot yourself.
figured that out all by yourself did you? [there is hope]
My nuts are itchy.
Why do you all insist that shooting yourself has to be fatal? Ever hear of shooting yourself in the foot?
youre freind can help or a gang member whatever floats youre boat.
….And thean Shoop the Woop…
you misspelled ‘da’
I wouldn’t shoot the whole choir. most are quite good. However there seems to always be one, very loud, very off key person who can never get the timing right who screws it up for everyone…audience included
Did you ever think maybe that one person was the only one who got it right and everyone else screwed up? Since you never really know, it’s best to shoot them all and let Gawd sort it all out.
At least this isn’t a fail from 2004.
As a church musician, I can (snobbishly) say that if you’re planning to go to the NPM convention, you probably should consider the instructions carefully (even though they’re given in the wrong order).
Catholic church, no doubt
Nice erik. Nice. LOL. jk. 4 failure. looks photoshopped.
I can totally see the fail, you gotta shoot the choir FIRST, then yourself… total FAIL.
I’d like to see the results….
wow, that HORRIBLE advice
http://www.lowbrowsophisticate.com/category/grady-ocorn
Awesome.
The grammar! It makes me bleed!
seems more like a suicide suggestion
I took the choir suggestion. The results : They all died.
You shot my girlfriend!!!!!!!!!!