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I work with people that need these!
That sounds, uhmm, fresh?
Nah, they’re all a bunch of a$$es. They could use a little freshening up.
Two aisles over are the twat fresheners.
Do you get a discount if you buy in bulk?
Sure! Just have that Verizon rep over there —->
assist you with calculating the discount.
I Peta not.
Aw, you don’t think Vickie can handle the math, either?
I’m more suspicious of the verizon rep being a sqishable.
Whoopsie — I accidenty “u”. I should send myself a card :/
And a spelling fail to boot.
A discount!? They are already four for a penny.
(.25 cents)
Sure, I guess you get a discount, but I think you fail butt if you need it
Maybe if you buy 40 you’ll get 4 free. You know…..That’d be 44 fresheners for 10 cents!
.25 cents? thats like… like… VERIZON MATH FAIL!
in any case thats .0025$ each.
BUT ITS A MATTER OF OPINION!
I’m confused here, are they eau de ass or is it for smelly asses to smell fresh… And in that case… What does a fresh smell like???
PS. How much are the twat fresheners???
PN, you won’t need one of those until you are post-op. You get a year’s supply from the hospital. No worries.
pipple under 25 are not alloed to poste heer!
Pimples under 25 are not allowed.
A quarter cent? That’s a hella good deal. I’ve been looking for one of these to go with my penis mightier.
I prefer to spend the extra on the sword…
hahaha!
i think by ‘ass. air fresheners’ whoever wrote it meant ‘assorted’ air fresheners and was just assking for trouble lol don’t let people be too hard on you
I think somebody doesn’t know how to spell “assorted”.
Was that the joke? Thanks for helping!
No problem. I do what I can.
Surely the joke is that they’ve not spelled/spelt fresheners correctly?
Anyway, as all Brits know, an ass is like a donkey or a mule.
I think someone’s got a case of the Thursdays.
Yeah.. ummm.. I’m going to go ahead and ass you to freshen up.. mkay?
Oh, *NOW* I get it.
No, they just suck at abbriviating it
There I was completely wasting, out of work and down
all inside it’s so frustrating as I drift from town to town
feel as though nobody cares if I live or die
so I might as well begin to put some action in my life
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
So much for the golden future, I can’t even start
I’ve had every promise broken, there’s anger in my heart
you don’t know what it’s like, you don’t have a clue
if you did you’d find yourselves doing the same thing too
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
You don’t know what it’s like
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law, breaking the law
Breaking the law
And now you need an Ass Air Freshener?
Is it .25 cents or .25 dollars?
And do they have a potato fragrance?
Yes, the scent is called “Bubble and Squeak”.
*sigh*
I do it for Fluffy.
Awww.. I’m getting all faklempt here Admiral..
nope, only scent available is rotten eggs and sulfur
actually, it does say 0.25 CENTS… so that would be a quarter of a penny
This was the same sale Walmart had at Christmas and it caused the stampede.
Its so obvious after a lawbreak EVERYBODY should have a fresh clean wipe!
Judas Priest! Great taste in music, danger!
Aaah, shut up, you twat!
Oh those bones, oh those bones,
oh those skeleton bones.
Oh those bones, oh those bones,
oh those skeleton bones.
Oh those bones, oh those bones,
oh those skeleton bones.
Oh mercy how they scare!
With the toe bone connected
to the foot bone,
and the foot bone connected
to the ankle bone,
and the ankle bone connected
to the leg bone.
Oh mercy how they scare!
Oh those bones, oh those bones,
oh those skeleton bones.
Oh those bones, oh those bones,
oh those skeleton bones.
Oh those bones, oh those bones,
oh those skeleton bones.
Oh mercy how they scare!
With the leg bone connected
to the knee bone,
and the knee bone connected
to the thigh bone,
and the thigh bone connected
to the hip bone.
Oh mercy how they scare!
Oh those bones, oh those bones,
oh those skeleton bones.
Oh those bones, oh those bones,
oh those skeleton bones.
Oh those bones, oh those bones,
oh those skeleton bones.
Oh mercy how they scare!
With the hip bone connected
to the back bone,
and the back bone connected
to the neck bone,
and the neck bone connected
to the head bone,
Oh mercy how they scare!
Oh those bones, oh those bones,
oh those skeleton bones.
Oh those bones, oh those bones,
oh those skeleton bones.
Oh those bones, oh those bones,
oh those skeleton bones.
Oh mercy how they scare!
With the finger bone connected
to the hand bone,
and the hand bone connected
to the arm bone,
and the arm bone connected
to the shoulder bone,
Oh mercy how they scare!
Oh those bones, oh those bones,
oh those skeleton bones.
Oh those bones, oh those bones,
oh those skeleton bones.
Oh those bones, oh those bones,
oh those skeleton bones.
Oh mercy how they scare!
With the shoulder bone connected
to the back bone,
and the back bone connected
to the neck bone,
and the neck bone connected
to the head bone.
Oh mercy how they scare!
Slow day in the failblog.
Yep.
What gave it away? The lack of posts or the really long one below this one dedicated to Fail?
Actually, the lack of mookie posts.
Ah, I see. Perhaps she’s sleeping off a hangover? Or she’s in the clink from misbehaving last night?
Mookie Post? Is that similar to a Flag Pole?
I guess, both are fun to slide down.
Yes, but pulling the string on a Mookie Post won’t lower the flag.
You sure that is not a flag? I see white, red and … eww.
black?
with a swastika in the middle?
I knew it! You’re Tom Cruise!
If the shoes fits.
If the shoe fits. If the shoes fit.. If the shoes throw fits? Or
throw themselves at a President?
No, you’re mistaken, Tom Cruise is scientology, not Nazi!
same thing isn’t it?
Mookie Post was that actress in “Night Court”.
The rib bone is connected to the arm bone.
The arm bone is connected to the head bone.
The head bone is connected to the leg bone.
The leg bone is connected to the hip bone.
The hip bone is connected to the arm bone.
The arm bone is connected to the rib bone.
The rib bone is connected to the leg bone.
The leg bone is connected to the hip bone.
The hip bone is connected to the head bone.
The head bone is connected to the rib bone.
The rib bone is connected to the leg bone.
The leg bone is connected to the arm bone.
I’m glad to see those 12 years of medical school that I’m busting my butt to put you through, is finally paying off.
This was after the accident.
*sigh*
I’m glad to see those 12 years of medical school that I’m busting my butt to put you through, is finally paying off.
In stereo!
Screw you, Failmonster, SCREW YOU!
*Shakes fist at nothing in particular*
That’s karma for mocking a learned member of the medical profession.
Karma? Fine, I’ll put you on my list.
My name is Chris.
I’m glad to see those 12 years of medical school that I’m busting my butt to put you through, is finally paying off.
I’m glad to see those 12 years of medical school that I’m busting my butt to put you through, is finally paying off.
I’m glad to see those 12 years of medical school that I’m busting my butt to put you through, is finally paying off.
I?m glad to see those 12 years of medical school that I’m
bursting my buttplug to plug it through, is finally paying off.
I’m glad to see. Those 12 years of medical school.. is finally
paying off. I’m bursting my buttplug over here, Johnson!
Stop replying to all my posts or i’ll get Baudelaire!
Mwuahahahahaha. No one else is on.. Who am I supposed
to reply to? Myself?
Hellooo?? Can you hear my self? Mic check.. One… Two..
Nope, sorry. No one’s home.
Yet the lights are on.
And you can hear the TV.
Judas Beef!
Charcoal-lined undies would put an end to this travesty!
that gives a new meaning to clearance
FIRST!
Fail
Faility fail fail fail.
they totally spelled freshners wrong! BWHAHAHA!!
Best. Fail. Ever.
Worst.
Observer.
Ever.
FAIL!
Fail in fail!!
You’re too fail to say fail
Fail!
Fail is not an adjective!
Fail isn’t really a noun either, but then where would this site be without that little twist on grammar?
How’s that fail I failed you with, failty?
Grammar’s getting old, she don’t twist like she used to. It’s why grampar keeps feeling up his nurse when she changes his diaper.
Fortunately for that nurse, however, they use these ass air freshners on ol’ grampar.
Not to mention its spelled ‘FRESHENER’
Not to mention it’s in Kmart
Not to mention it came from me
Not to mention they’re only .25 cents. Then again, I didn’t really expect better from Kmart than Verizon.
.25 cents = 1/4th cent!
Thus, that’s 4 for a penny!
400 per $1.00 is a helluva deal!
Wrong fail, bob. That belongs on the Verizon fail. And it’s really $25.00.
Can I ‘Join In’?
Only if you can hear me now.
If you hear me now
you take away the…
Not wrong fail.. Bob is combining fails to create super fails! Der.
I really think that’s just a matter of opinion.
Well I believe your matter is clogging my opinion, so scram!
The freshness or the ass smell?
I need one.
I was thrilled when I saw this! I’m just not sure if they hang from your belt, or need to be inserted. Either way – the neighborhood will be happy if I stock up on these.
I see no fail here. Only bargain.
The lines under the digits clearly emphasize this point….
I hope the Verizion people don’t moonlight here, lest it cost me $25 instead.
Yeah, but you could get them back by writing a check with a convoluted math problem to pay it.
Yeah your looking at the “Freshners” sign… The fail is the orange sweater in the background. Who the hell would wear something like that?
Convicts.
I can see you point, touche.
*your*
Would it help if I pointed?
Christopher? Is that you?
I thought you were pink.
I was kinda hoping nobody would notice teh difference.
I noticed ‘the’ difference.
I think it would be in your best *cracks knuckles* interests to not “notice” the difference.
That hurt your knuckles didn’t it?
Yeah, but its way more intimidating when I do it with the walnut craker while blankly staring you down.
Crake or Death?
(There must be a dearth of cake.)
Didn’t even notice, Admiral. Bukkit me.
SPLORCH!
Oh dearth…does that mean there’s no more cake?
No, but plenty of bukkit to go around.
*offers Dragon some fresh honey buns*
I’m sure she already has two.
I thought it was three?
*blink*
Walking out of FOOOOM! range, yet again.
Good move. I smell a rat. Or some other rodent-type.
Rodney Stranger, where?
^ Spleen. Can’t be rat/rodent-type. Must be what Chris put
in the Bukkit?
*vents Spleen*
I use that same excuse when I am feeling less than delicate.
Barack Obama
Perhaps a avid hunter with a shower problem? He can get both products he needs here.
The scent of a fragrant donkey would mask the human odor quite well.
*looks at name* O_O WHAT DID YOU DO WITH SKWERLLY BOB?!!
No squirrels where harmed in the making of my name, except for that one
but I think he was already dead…
Fart fresheners? I thought only Spencers sold those.
Assistant Air Fresheners?
Assassin Air Fresheners
Associate Air Fresheners
Assimilated Air Fresheners?
Assertive Air Fresheners?
Assigned Air Fresheners?
Assaulting Air Fresheners, obviously.
Asshole Air Fresheners?
An Assorted Assemblage of Air Fresheners.
Assiduous Air Fresheners?
Asspen Colorado Air Fresheners.
Assassinating Assapanics Air Fresheners.
Last warning man!
Last? I didn’t get a first?
go buy leviticus jewelry!
You got something against Assassinating American flying
squirrels with Air Fresheners????
Go read Leviticus 18:22, I think it applies to you.
Assorted. This sign, however, means a different type of ass. though. It’s donkey smelling
Nope, it clearly says “ass air freshners” because they “freshn” your farts (not sure where I learned to read trailer trash, let alone learned to speak it – should that bother me?). You fail.
Attention Kmart shoppers there is a blue light special on aisle 15. Ass fresheners 25 cents each for the next hour only.
Who was your math teacher in school, because I want to kill him/her for failing you. Look again, it’s .25 *CENTS* – that’s a quarter of a cent NOT 25 cents. You bought one, I bought 100. Your farts still smell and my shit doesn’t stink.
I’m so jalous.
Yeah, me too.
And hungry.
So that was Judy on that ass, not Sasa?
That’s Sasa-fras, lass! !
Spicy!!
The rootin’ tootin’ vicar needs an ass freshener.
Potato scented?
I’d think these would be useful for children that are cared for in dumpsters.
It’s funny because asses smell like poo.
It’s funny because asses smell like you
That sounds like the punchline of a “Soviet Russia” joke.
I want to punch whoever came up with the Soviet Russia line.
Yakov Smirnoff? That line is forming around the block.
Same with the guy who started the Chuck Norris meme.
*begins to shake… can’t… resist…*
In Sov13t Russia, bloc(k) forms around YOU!
See, how can these summations not make you smile?
*shakes Funnyboi by the hand*
Ah, my favorite =D
Man, those would do great in my ass.!
Please try and keep you posts clean.
I clean my post once a day.
Remember, wax on, wax off.
What, i remembered the period?
Thats “assorted”, nothing wrong about that!
If you’re cleaning your post, then it’s wax on, whacks off…
Thanks Jules, I think I’ve been doing it wrong! I thought it was whacks on, whacks off …
That’s … what she said?
She?!? Don’t kid yourself.
Some women are into that kind of thing.
While, at least the ones that hang around here.
I wouldn’t assume that.
But, I am sure it’s true.
I assure you it’s true!
We can all sit here and assume this and assure eachother that,
although that’s all time we could use getting those ass. air freshners,
at lowlow prices, that we so surely need.
who? chuck norrisses?
Chuck norrisas.
Kmart is usually a great store, way better than Target, but sometimes they do get a little goofy!
Omg…someone get this person a brain and some taste STAT!!
*shoves nuts inside Logician’s head*
Yay! Brains! :B Um.. Taste.. Taste.. Hmm.
*sprays “ass air freshners” in Logicians mouth”
Allll better.
-” +*
Thats gonna sting
Not if you try some of the lube you use with your potatoes. Crisco, I believe?
No use butter, because it is finger licking good!
I think this is another math fail. The Ass fresheners are labeled as a quarter of a cent (a coin which no longer exists).
It is. I see this everywhere. I once saw it on an Arby’s sign and MADE them give me a cookie for .79 cents… I tipped them the last .21 cents.
Where do you guys live, in Botswana? In the USA there’s plenty quarter cent coins!
WHAT?!? Share! PLZKTHXBAI.. Washington needs some more Quarter
cent coins!!!
ok, that’s it, i warned ya! Be prepared the next days when you cross the street!
I don’t cross streets. I cross rivers.. fields.. and sometimes dirt roads.
But never streets.
you better cross your fingers!
*crosses fingers* Ohhh!!! I’ve never crossed those before! Thanks!
What do I owe you? .25 cents?
that one sucked! Ok i let you live, gotta go! Cheers!
Yes! *keeps her .25 cents!* My precious…
That one was original and way better than the one before!
my uncle invented the half penny once (seriously, look up dan hurkett, there are whole websites in the coin collector community. It’s invariably the most insane thing I have ever seen)
Your uncle was a cheap bastard.
How is this a fail? I know plenty of people who need a rear pocket attachment for there jeans and some of this stuff.
My only question is: is it a suppository?
The word suppository should never be followed by a smileycon, son.
I guess it could be if you rolled like that. I’d just hang it in front of the door, so to speak – butt that’s because it’s a one way portal.
.
Except for that damned alien probe, of course. Butt it hurts enough already when it goes back inside …
FIRST!!!
An alternative for pepperspray
Oh, win! Nothing like being sprayed in the face with Ass.
Thought it was spelled Axe.
Can we get a penny’s worth of these for the nitwit with the “jalous” tat? (Fail fail fail fail fail!)
a quarter of a penny each… must have old verizon reps working there
It’s actually a double fail because .25 cents means those “Ass air fresheners” cost 12.5 cents.
.25 cents = 12.5 cents to you? You should work for Verizon!!!
I agree
.25 cents = $.0025
25 cents = $.25
(QED)
Quite the Educated Dog?
KMart = automatic fail no matter what the picture is of.
Didn’t you just end yer sentence inna thingy – yer not supposed to? Wait, I did it? Whose meds are these?
Quadruple fail!
1) Abbreviation
2) Spelling
3) Decimal usage
4) Kmart
Let’s see now, the pic was posted at 7 AM and you replied at 5:34 PM, so it took you over 10.5 hours to come up with all those fails. Did you do it on your own or did you have help? Do you know how so very proud we are of you?
The are great!
Shouldn’t you be over at Engrish?
Hurray for laziness.
*pokes John with a stick* Huh. Asleep. Those three words took it all out of him.
looks photoshopped
Funny, it doesn’t taste photoshopped…
WTF – WHAT THE FAIL!?!?!
Hey inspecter… go inspect your name. And your caps lock key. I think you’ll be up to your Ass. in case work for a while…
Fail? I can think of plenty of Ass. that could DEFINITELY use freshening.
LOL, priceless! Who cant use a good ass air freshener!
RT
http://www.online-anonymity.at.tc
My roommate should probably use these.
My nuts are itchy.
Sack scratchers– next aisle.
It’s a multiple FAIL – .25¢ is ¼ of a cent. Drives me nuts when I see this…
LOL
They freshen ass air. To make the farts smell better. Obviously.
it fails 3 times.. ass air fresheners, freshener is spelled wrong, and the price is .25 cents… as in 4 for a penny, as in $0.0025
I dont know whats worse, the fact that they need to pay .25 cents or that they shortened it to ass
No wonder they’re on clearance.